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View Full Version : What "girly" habits do you have? (or MAN-ly for the ladies)


BigVE
01-07-2005, 03:12 PM
As your average straight male I wonder what feminine (gay-ish) habits some of you other manly men may have, or if your a lady what kind of manly habits do you have? This was brought up today by a co-worker making fun of me for using hand lotion...yes, hand lotion. I told him "its winter and its dry air and you can have dry cracked almost bleeding knuckles if you want, Im using hand lotion." He laughed at me and then asked to use it too. I told him " I also use lip balm...is that gay-ish too????" He said "yeah, kinda." I didnt share the lip balm with him, that would be gay. ;) Whats your most "feminine" habit?

|Zach|
01-07-2005, 03:13 PM
Posting so much on an internet BB and conversing with the poster formally known as "SDChiefsfan"

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:14 PM
As your average straight male I wonder what feminine (gay-ish) habits some of you other manly men may have, or if your a lady what kind of manly habits do you have? This was brought up today by a co-worker making fun of me for using hand lotion...yes, hand lotion. I told him "its winter and its dry air and you can have dry cracked almost bleeding knuckles if you want, Im using hand lotion." He laughed at me and then asked to use it too. I told him " I also use lip balm...is that gay-ish too????" He said "yeah, kinda." I didnt share the lip balm with him, that would be gay. ;) Whats your most "feminine" habit?

I say "like" a lot.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 03:15 PM
I menstruate.

Mr. Laz
01-07-2005, 03:15 PM
carmex

Phobia
01-07-2005, 03:16 PM
I keep myself well groomed and tidy.... everywhere.

Nightfyre
01-07-2005, 03:16 PM
I clip my fingernails at least once a week.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:17 PM
I clip my fingernails at least once a week.
I don't see that as girly so much as a basic standard of hygiene.

CosmicPal
01-07-2005, 03:17 PM
I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body

Nightfyre
01-07-2005, 03:18 PM
I don't see that as girly so much as a basic standard of hygiene.
come live in MT for a month then. Youll learn different.

cheeeefs
01-07-2005, 03:18 PM
I have no feminine attributes

I'm the Alpha male

*whistles*

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:19 PM
I don't see that as girly so much as a basic standard of hygiene.

Funny. I don't clip my fingernails based on time. More on how long they are.

Come to think of it, I can't remember the last time I clipped my toenails, it being winter and all.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:19 PM
come live in MT for a month then. Youll learn different.
That just makes Montanans unkempt.

Now, if you got manicures once a week...

Nightfyre
01-07-2005, 03:20 PM
That just makes Montanans unkempt.

Now, if you got manicures once a week...
Thats a big no.

Predarat
01-07-2005, 03:20 PM
I dont have any I know of but Elvis Grbac Pees sitting down.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:20 PM
Funny. I don't clip my fingernails based on time. More on how long they are.

Me, too... but, I find it tends to happen about once a week.

stevieray
01-07-2005, 03:22 PM
I keep myself well groomed and tidy.... everywhere.

This is true. Nzoner and I waited an hour for Phil to get ready to go to Dallas at fourthirty in the morning.

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 03:22 PM
I say "like" a lot.
Like, why?

Saulbadguy
01-07-2005, 03:22 PM
I sit down when I pee.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 03:23 PM
I sit down to pee when I'm very drunk.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 03:23 PM
I sit down when I pee.

Hey you beat me to it. ROFL

BigVE
01-07-2005, 03:24 PM
Isnt the proper term "metro-sexual"? These might include: Eyebrow plucking, shaving body hair other than your face, "frosted tips" in your hair...anything you may have seen on Queer Eye. C'mon, you know who you are.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:25 PM
shaving body hair other than your face

It's for a good cause.

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:27 PM
Isnt the proper term "metro-sexual"? These might include: Eyebrow plucking, shaving body hair other than your face, "frosted tips" in your hair...anything you may have seen on Queer Eye. C'mon, you know who you are.

I shave my legs in the spring and summer months.

cheeeefs
01-07-2005, 03:28 PM
Isnt the proper term "metro-sexual"? These might include: Eyebrow plucking, shaving body hair other than your face, "frosted tips" in your hair...anything you may have seen on Queer Eye. C'mon, you know who you are.


Is it still gay to let your girlfriend pluck your eyebrows when you make a deal that every time she does it she owes you 6 sexual favors? I've never been so happy to have bushy eyebrows, even if letting her pluck them has some of teh gay in it.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 03:29 PM
shaving body hair other than your face

When you hit 40, hair starts popping out all over the place and you will be branded a freak if you don't eliminate it.

PastorMikH
01-07-2005, 03:29 PM
Can't really come up with anything substantial, but I have stopped and asked directions before. Does that count?

cheeeefs
01-07-2005, 03:29 PM
I shave my legs in the spring and summer months.

is this so you don't get nasty sweaty leg hair that you should wash every day?

Phobia
01-07-2005, 03:29 PM
This is true. Nzoner and I waited an hour for Phil to get ready to go to Dallas at fourthirty in the morning.

I knew you and Joe were watching, too.

Demonpenz
01-07-2005, 03:30 PM
cry after sex with men

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:30 PM
Is it still gay to let your girlfriend pluck your eyebrows when you make a deal that every time she does it she owes you 6 sexual favors? I've never been so happy to have bushy eyebrows, even if letting her pluck them has some of teh gay in it.

I don't see eyebrow plucking is being feminine. It's just good grooming. The sex is a bonus.

Phobia
01-07-2005, 03:30 PM
When you hit 40, hair starts popping out all over the place and you will be branded a freak if you don't eliminate it.


40?

Did you mean 30?

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:30 PM
I shave my legs in the spring and summer months.
Do you find that makes them easier to wash?

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:30 PM
is this so you don't get nasty sweaty leg hair that you should wash every day?

No, but that is a bonus.

PastorMikH
01-07-2005, 03:31 PM
cry after sex



Wow, so do most of the Raiders players - though there tears are probably from the mace.

BigVE
01-07-2005, 03:31 PM
It's for a good cause.


Im guessing its 'cause you gots a big 'ol bush and you need to keep it under control. ;) Hey, if it keeps the lady/ladies happy then do whatever it takes. Its only fair if I want/expect her to keep things neat and tidy then I should do the same, right? I hear ya'.

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:31 PM
Do you find that makes them easier to wash?

I don't know. It's not spring yet.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 03:31 PM
Can't really come up with anything substantial, but I have stopped and asked directions before. Does that count?

Fag.

cheeeefs
01-07-2005, 03:31 PM
oh! and btw BigVE. Come on now... show us the rest of the caption in your avatar:

"Let me buy you a drink!"

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:31 PM
40?

Did you mean 30?
Hell, I'm only 25 and there's hair growing places it don't belong.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 03:32 PM
Wow, so do most of the Raiders players - though there tears are probably from the mace.

Oh, my ... ROFL ROFL

PastorMikH
01-07-2005, 03:32 PM
Fag.



I hope your computer blows up.


:fire:

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 03:32 PM
40?

Did you mean 30?

No 30 is when the hair on your head stops growing, at 40 it starts coming out your ears and ass.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:32 PM
Im guessing its 'cause you gots a big 'ol bush and you need to keep it under control. ;) Hey, if it keeps the lady/ladies happy then do whatever it takes. Its only fair if I want/expect her to keep things neat and tidy then I should do the same, right? I hear ya'.

Bingo.

Phobia
01-07-2005, 03:32 PM
Hell, I'm only 25 and there's hair growing places it don't belong.

That's because your liver is 80.

stevieray
01-07-2005, 03:34 PM
I knew you and Joe were watching, too.

We were outside laughing about your thirty pairs of shoes.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:34 PM
No 30 is when the hair on your head stops growing, at 40 it starts coming out your ears and ass.
I must be a prodigy or something.

cheeeefs
01-07-2005, 03:38 PM
I say "like" a lot.

There is this woman in my History class who talks 100 miles a minute, and every other word is "like like like like" I'm as bored as a 2X4 in this class so my goal every day is to count her "likes" over the course of three days of counting the totals have been 68 27 and the record holding 174 in one day. She talked so much the day she got 174 (today;) that I also decided to make a subcategory, the most amount of likes in one round of explaning something, as well as timing the time that it took. she belted out 41 likes in 1 minute and 27 seconds of diatribe. I was amazed.

if it were a smaller class or she knew more then she does so she could actually add to more conversations I'm sure she could easily break 1,000 likes in one class period... she's that good.

Baby Lee
01-07-2005, 03:38 PM
What "girly" habits do you have?
He asks as I watch Gilmore Girls.

BigVE
01-07-2005, 03:39 PM
See what I mean? Todays "modern" men do alot more "grooming" than men did 20-30 years ago, and alot of this grooming would have been considered pretty gay back in "the old days". I know I could give my 'ol man a few tips: Pluck the uni-brow, clip the 1 1/2" nose hairs AND the 2" ear hairs. If I said a word to him he would slap me and call me pu$$Y. LOL

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 03:40 PM
I have this lesbian tendency of kissing women. :hmmm:

Phobia
01-07-2005, 03:40 PM
We were outside laughing about your thirty pair of shoes.

Yeah, this is as good a thread as any to reveal that tidbit.

I have a lot of shoes for a lot of different activities and I have another pair arriving on my front door any day.

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:41 PM
There is this woman in my History class who talks 100 miles a minute, and every other word is "like like like like" I'm as bored as a 2X4 in this class so my goal every day is to count her "likes" over the course of three days of counting the totals have been 68 27 and the record holding 174 in one day. She talked so much the day she got 174 (today;) that I also decided to make a subcategory, the most amount of likes in one round of explaning something, as well as timing the time that it took. she belted out 41 likes in 1 minute and 27 seconds of diatribe. I was amazed.

if it were a smaller class or she knew more then she does so she could actually add to more conversations I'm sure she could easily break 1,000 likes in one class period... she's that good.

She'd be dead if I were in that class.

stevieray
01-07-2005, 03:44 PM
Yeah, this is as good a thread as any to reveal that tidbit.

I have a lot of shoes for a lot of different activities and I have another pair arriving on my front door any day.

knitting with dog hair...?

I think most guys phils age and under have the greatest chance of being metrosexual.... Phil is much more like his mom than Dad.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:45 PM
I have this lesbian tendency of kissing women. :hmmm:
I'm calling bullshit.

Bob Dole
01-07-2005, 03:47 PM
knitting with dog hair...?

I think most guys phils age and under have the greatest chance of being metrosexual.... Phil is much more like his mom than Dad.

Bob Dole hopes she doesn't hear about that statement.

She's a sweet woman and deserves better from you, stevieray.

cheeeefs
01-07-2005, 03:48 PM
She'd be dead if I were in that class.
believe me I've almost dreamt about it.

I used to grit my teeth and shake my head and get all kinds of pissed off until I came up with the idea of counting them, it distracts me enough that it doesn't piss me off so much anymore

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 03:48 PM
When I drink a beer, I burp real loud.

Frankie
01-07-2005, 03:48 PM
In real cold winter days, I've been known to wear panty-hose (hate long johns) under my pants. But don't laugh, I only discovered this method after I read that some NFL players wear pantyhose under their gears for real cold day games.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 03:50 PM
In real cold winter days, I've been known to wear panty-hose (instead of long johns) under my pants. But don't laugh, I only discovered this method after I read that some NFL players wear pantyhose under their gears for read cold day games.

I'm kinda the same way, only instead of pantyhose I wear a garter belt and stockings.

stevieray
01-07-2005, 03:50 PM
She's a sweet woman and deserves better from you, stevieray.

Good point. phils dad is metrosexual.

JazzzLovr
01-07-2005, 03:50 PM
Bob Dole hopes she doesn't hear about that statement.

She's a sweet woman and deserves better from you, stevieray.

ROFL

Cannibal
01-07-2005, 03:51 PM
I say "like" a lot.

fag ROFL

Frankie
01-07-2005, 03:55 PM
If some you still consider cooking a woman thing, I admit I like to cook. Very much.

ChiTown
01-07-2005, 03:56 PM
I sit when I pee.........;)

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:56 PM
If some you still consider cooking a woman thing, I admit I like to cook. Very much.
Cooking's not girly unless you're wearing a frilly apron at the time.

Or, pantyhose.

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 03:56 PM
I'm calling bullshit.
Well Shit. :banghead:

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:56 PM
In real cold winter days, I've been known to wear panty-hose (hate long johns) under my pants. But don't laugh, I only discovered this method after I read that some NFL players wear pantyhose under their gears for real cold day games.

At this point, you may want to consider that some NFL players are gay...

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 03:57 PM
I sit when I pee.........;)
That seems to be pretty popular.

Donger
01-07-2005, 03:57 PM
If some you still consider cooking a woman thing, I admit I like to cook. Very much.

Grilling, not cooking.

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 03:59 PM
I'm kinda the same way, only instead of pantyhose I wear a garter belt and stockings.

ROFL

I forgot SK, I need to go add him to my list.

Frankie
01-07-2005, 03:59 PM
Grilling, not cooking.

Cooking, more than grilling, for me.... honey.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:01 PM
Cooking, more than grilling, for me.... honey.

That ain't right, pantywaist.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:02 PM
That ain't right, pantywaist.
Bah. Serious cooking is man's work. When you think of a great chef, do you picture a woman? Exactly.

They just leave the piddly shit to the broads.

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 04:06 PM
Bah. Serious cooking is man's work. When you think of a great chef, do you picture a woman? Exactly.

They just leave the piddly shit to the broads.

That's it. I quit. I refuse to make you Mac and Cheese anymore, you ungrateful, drunken, Starr Jones humpin' bastage.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:06 PM
Bah. Serious cooking is man's work. When you think of a great chef, do you picture a woman? Exactly.

They just leave the piddly shit to the broads.

Yeah, I was gonna edit and say, "unless you're a chef."

I'm just kidding, anyway. I love to cook, inside or on the grill. Mostly meats though. The wife handles the veggies and dessert.

Bob Dole
01-07-2005, 04:06 PM
Bob Dole complains a lot.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:07 PM
That's it. I quit. I refuse to make you Mac and Cheese anymore, you ungrateful, drunken, Starr Jones humpin' bastage.
Damnit! What're you doing here? You weren't supposed to see that.

Uh... I was talking about the other women... not you. You're different.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:07 PM
Bob Dole complains a lot.
I hear he has trouble unscrewing lids as well.

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 04:08 PM
Damnit! What're you doing here? You weren't supposed to see that.

Uh... I was talking about the other women... not you. You're different.

Well...ok. It's hard work pushing that little lever thingy on the little toaster thingy. Gimme a break.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:08 PM
Bob Dole complains a lot.

Sure, but can you take a compliment about your looks without saying, "Thanks, but...." and going on a diatribe about what you don't like about your body?

bogie
01-07-2005, 04:08 PM
I once screamed like a girl when Johnny Morton caught a pass.

ChiTown
01-07-2005, 04:09 PM
I once screamed like a girl when Johnny Morton caught a pass.

So did his boyfriend......

Frankie
01-07-2005, 04:09 PM
Bob Dole complains a lot.
BITCH!

;) :p

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:09 PM
Well...ok. It's hard work pushing that little lever thingy on the little toaster thingy. Gimme a break.
I know. But, you're one of the best at it. Quite talented, really.

Bob Dole
01-07-2005, 04:10 PM
Sure, but can you take a compliment about your looks without saying, "Thanks, but...." and going on a diatribe about what you don't like about your body?

Not really.

Bob Dole usually launches in to the problem arising from having an unusually large penis that tends to scare women.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:10 PM
Sure, but can you take a compliment about your looks without saying, "Thanks, but...." and going on a diatribe about what you don't like about your body?
I usually hear a diatribe about how it's supposedly "inappropriate" to slap her on the ass and say "nice pooper".

Sheesh. Women.

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 04:11 PM
When it's just me and my son in the room, I will fart really loud, blame him, and act extremely disgusted.


It's funny. Pisses him off.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 04:13 PM
So did his boyfriend......

Same guy.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:13 PM
Not really.

Bob Dole usually launches in to the problem arising from having an unusually large penis that tends to scare women.

You're obviously hanging out with the wrong type of women.

ChiTown
01-07-2005, 04:15 PM
When it's just me and my son in the room, I will fart really loud, blame him, and act extremely disgusted.


It's funny. Pisses him off.

Wow, I'm curiously aroused by that comment......

stevieray
01-07-2005, 04:15 PM
When it's just me and my son in the room, I will fart really loud, blame him, and act extremely disgusted.


It's funny. Pisses him off.

Until he brings home a girl who farts really loud and blames you, then acts disgusted.

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 04:16 PM
Until he brings home a girl who farts really loud and blames you, then acts disgusted.

Well..that would just be...well, gross.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:17 PM
I usually hear a diatribe about how it's supposedly "inappropriate" to slap her on the ass and say "nice pooper".

Sheesh. Women.

Just the difference between the sexes.

I was at a bar during my freshman year in college and this gal just walked up, grabbed my donger through my jeans, smiled and walked away. Got me thinking. I thoroughly enjoyed it (though she coulda finished) and I presume most guys would have to. But then, if the sexes were reversed, how many girls would the same reaction?

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:17 PM
Just the difference between the sexes.

I was at a bar during my freshman year in college and this gal just walked up, grabbed my donger through my jeans, smiled and walked away. Got me thinking. I thoroughly enjoyed it (though she coulda finished) and I presume most guys would have to. But then, if the sexes were reversed, how many girls would the same reaction?
You let her get away? WTF?

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 04:18 PM
Just the difference between the sexes.

I was at a bar during my freshman year in college and this gal just walked up, grabbed my donger through my jeans, smiled and walked away. Got me thinking. I thoroughly enjoyed it (though she coulda finished) and I presume most guys would have to. But then, if the sexes were reversed, how many girls would the same reaction?

Haven't you learned yet? Women can do whatever they want, men on the other hand will be blamed for everything.

It's the women's "movement" that brought us here.

stevieray
01-07-2005, 04:19 PM
Just the difference between the sexes.

I was at a bar during my freshman year in college and this gal just walked up, grabbed my donger through my jeans, smiled and walked away. Got me thinking. I thoroughly enjoyed it (though she coulda finished) and I presume most guys would have to. But then, if the sexes were reversed, how many girls would the same reaction?

donger shaves his legs and wants someone to spank his ass and say nice pooper....?

ChiTown
01-07-2005, 04:19 PM
Just the difference between the sexes.

I was at a bar during my freshman year in college and this gal just walked up, grabbed my donger through my jeans, smiled and walked away. Got me thinking. I thoroughly enjoyed it (though she coulda finished) and I presume most guys would have to. But then, if the sexes were reversed, how many girls would the same reaction?

You'd be spending time in the county jail for sexual assualt.

In reverse, after she'd grab your unit, you probably spent your time in the bar restroom manually finishing the job......

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:19 PM
You let her get away? WTF?

Yeah, I was still seriously dating my girlfriend from high school at the time.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 04:20 PM
When it's just me and my son in the room, I will fart really loud, blame him, and act extremely disgusted.


It's funny. Pisses him off.
When the kids were still home, I used to do that too and they would also get really pissed, wonder why? :hmmm:

Bob Dole
01-07-2005, 04:20 PM
Haven't you learned yet? Women can do whatever they want, men on the other hand will be blamed for everything.

It's the women's "movement" that brought us here.

Shouldn't you be in the kitchen baking Bob Dole a ****ing pie?

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 04:21 PM
Shouldn't you be in the kitchen baking Bob Dole a ****ing pie?

The only pie I'm giving you isn't coming out of the oven.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:21 PM
Yeah, I was still seriously dating my girlfriend from high school at the time.
That's the problem with girlfriends... they always get in the way of one night stands.

Luckily for me, no broad will put up with more for more than a few weeks. So, I'm pretty much always available for some fun.

You hear that ladies? I'm available. 100% No strings attached. Come on down.

Seriously.

*crickets*

sigh

stevieray
01-07-2005, 04:22 PM
The only pie I'm giving you isn't coming out of the oven.

no way.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:22 PM
The only pie I'm giving you isn't coming out of the oven.
Welp, looks like Dole wins.

Bob Dole
01-07-2005, 04:22 PM
The only pie I'm giving you isn't coming out of the oven.

Tease.

Jenny Gump
01-07-2005, 04:23 PM
Tease.

Whatever.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:25 PM
Haven't you learned yet? Women can do whatever they want, men on the other hand will be blamed for everything.

It's the women's "movement" that brought us here.

Heh.

Reminds me of a Chris Rock standup routine from Bigger & Blacker: "It ain't nothing when you women get offered d*ck. Sh*t. Every woman in here gets offered d*ck at least once a week; sh*t, once a day! 'Uh, can I help you with that?' = 'Can I help you with some d*ck!?'

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:26 PM
donger shaves his legs and wants someone to spank his ass and say nice pooper....?

What? Have I crossed the line again?

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:27 PM
That's the problem with girlfriends... they always get in the way of one night stands.

Luckily for me, no broad will put up with more for more than a few weeks. So, I'm pretty much always available for some fun.

You hear that ladies? I'm available. 100% No strings attached. Come on down.

Seriously.

*crickets*

sigh

ROFL

I've always been pretty monogamous. I can count the number of gals I've had on one hand.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:28 PM
ROFL

I've always been pretty monogamous. I can count the number of gals I've had on one hand.
Me, too.

How many times am I allowed to re-use fingers?

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:29 PM
Chris Rock: There are three types of women in the world:

A: Women that give NO head. Bye! See ya!
B: Women that give just enough head to shut ya up and my favorite
C: the women that want nothing more than to suck a d*ck.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:30 PM
Me, too.

How many times am I allowed to re-use fingers?

As many times as necessary to complete the count, of course.

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 04:30 PM
ROFL

I've always been pretty monogamous. I can count the number of gals I've had on one hand.
That's better than saying, "The number of girls I've had is my one hand."

:p

Frankie
01-07-2005, 04:30 PM
ROFL

I can count the number of gals I've had on one hand.
Lilliputians exist?... :shrug:

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:31 PM
A: Women that give NO head. Bye! See ya!

Whenever I meet one of those I look at her like a goddammed Betamax. "They still make you?"


Heh, I was once watching that special and Mom was in the room. Guess she wasn't comfortable listening to blowjob jokes with her son. She made me change the channel.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:32 PM
Lilliputians exist?... :shrug:

I don't know. I've never had one that I know of.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:33 PM
Whenever I meet one of those I look at her like a goddammed Betamax. "They still make you?"


Heh, I was once watching that special and Mom was in the room. Guess she wasn't comfortable listening to blowjob jokes with her son. She made me change the channel.

That really was a great show.

Frankie
01-07-2005, 04:35 PM
I don't know. I've never had one that I know of.
Oh never mind. Mine was a pretty lame joke..... Had to do with "all the gals" and "one hand."

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 04:35 PM
That's better than saying, "The number of girls I've had is my one hand."

:p

Thank you! I've been sitting here for 5 minutes trying to figure a way to make a masturbation joke about his line, and you got it. :)

bogie
01-07-2005, 04:35 PM
The only pie I'm giving you isn't coming out of the oven.

Bob Dole. She just grabbed you by the crotch! Don't let her get away!

Bob Dole
01-07-2005, 04:35 PM
Whatever.

Okay then.

See you about 11:30.

Nzoner
01-07-2005, 04:35 PM
ROFL

I've always been pretty monogamous. I can count the number of gals I've had on one hand.

Damn,and with a nik like Donger I woulda thought.........

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:36 PM
Okay then.

See you about 11:30.
Dang, you must really like cowpies.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:36 PM
Oh never mind. Mine was a pretty lame joke..... Had to do with "all the gals" and "one hand."

Yeah, I know.

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 04:36 PM
Thank you! I've been sitting here for 5 minutes trying to figure a way to make a masturbation joke about his line, and you got it. :)
I have a stroke of brilliance about once a year. :thumb:

This of course means I'm sunk until Jan 2006. :banghead:

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 04:37 PM
I have a stroke of brilliance about once a year. :thumb:

This of course mean I'm sunk until Jan 2006. :banghead:

I've had several brilliant strokes ... usually while viewing your sig pics.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:38 PM
Damn,and with a nik like Donger I woulda thought.........

It's not the quantity; it's the quality.






























Someone had to say it.

Frankie
01-07-2005, 04:39 PM
I have a stroke of brilliance about once a year. :thumb:
Earth year?

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:39 PM
Damn,and with a nik like Donger I woulda thought.........

BTW, we're not counting BJs and handjobs, are we? Those don't count.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:39 PM
It's not the quantity; it's the quality.

I'm more of a "Lower your standards, raise your average" kinda guy.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:40 PM
BTW, we're not counting BJs and handjobs, are we? Those don't count.
I don't think I *could* count those.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 04:40 PM
BTW, we're not counting BJs and handjobs, are we? Those don't count.

Especially not the ones you give yourself.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:41 PM
Especially not the ones you give yourself.
If I could give myself a BJ, I wouldn't have much motivation to leave the house.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 04:42 PM
If I could give myself a BJ, I wouldn't have much motivation to leave the house.

Especially if it smelled like pancakes.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:44 PM
If I could give myself a BJ, I wouldn't have much motivation to leave the house.

Has anyone else thought about buying one of the Craftmatic adjustable beds just to see if you could blow yourself? You know, you get that V going, and it's decision time.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:45 PM
I'm more of a "Lower your standards, raise your average" kinda guy.

As were my older brothers. They pounded some really questionable gals. I'm talking no teeth, and such.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:46 PM
Especially not the ones you give yourself.

Well, duh.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:46 PM
Especially if it smelled like pancakes.
I wonder if syrup stains are hard to get out of a bedspread...

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:47 PM
I'm talking no teeth

Yikes. I've never dipped that low.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:47 PM
I wonder if syrup stains are hard to get out of a bedspread...

Not if you don't let it dry.

Phobia
01-07-2005, 04:47 PM
As were my older brothers. They pounded some really questionable gals. I'm talking no teeth, and such.

No teeth? What's questionable about those standards? That's quality, right there.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:48 PM
Yikes. I've never dipped that low.

Yeah. I actually walked in on that one. Two of my oldest brothers and this one skank. Pretty vivid memory for a 12 year old. Hence the quantity versus quality thingy.

Phobia
01-07-2005, 04:49 PM
Yeah. I actually walked in on that one. Two of my oldest brothers and this one skank. Pretty vivid memory for a 12 year old. Hence the quantity versus quality thingy.

Ok - well, I don't think I could have a threesome with my brother. Nah - I couldn't.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:49 PM
Yeah. I actually walked in on that one. Two of my oldest brothers and this one skank. Pretty vivid memory for a 12 year old. Hence the quantity versus quality thingy.
She didn't offer to give ya little gumjob?

Frankie
01-07-2005, 04:51 PM
I was at a bar during my freshman year in college and this gal just walked up, grabbed my donger through my jeans, smiled and walked away. Got me thinking. I thoroughly enjoyed it (though she coulda finished) and I presume most guys would have to. But then, if the sexes were reversed, how many girls would the same reaction?

Hey Donger,... are you religious? If so, check out Deuteronomy 25.11. ;)

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 04:53 PM
I blow my nose excessively.

Oh and I like to stare at other men's penises. Although I doubt you'll find many girls at urinals.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:54 PM
Hey Donger,... are you religious? If so, check out Deuteronomy 25.11. ;)

What does heavy water have to do with religion?

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:54 PM
She didn't offer to give ya little gumjob?

Let's just say that she wasn't able to speak at the time.

Frankie
01-07-2005, 04:56 PM
What does heavy water have to do with religion?
Oh, you are not religious then.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 04:57 PM
Let's just say that she wasn't able to speak at the time.

Good God, was this an infant they were sodomizing?

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:57 PM
Ok - well, I don't think I could have a threesome with my brother. Nah - I couldn't.

It was apparently a rather common thing. Of course, now they're both married with kids, and I hold this knowledge over their heads with a smile.

I'd never narc on them, but a few years ago we were all together on some holiday, and somehow threesomes came up. They looked like they were going to faint.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 04:58 PM
I blow my nose excessively.

Oh and I like to stare at other men's penises. Although I doubt you'll find many girls at urinals.
Don't get me started GoatCheese :)

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 05:00 PM
I had an injury that makes my right pinky unable to bend correctly, I get some funny looks when I drink with my right hand in bars.

Frankie
01-07-2005, 05:04 PM
I had an injury that makes my right pinky unable to bend correctly, I get some funny looks when I drink with my right hand in bars.
Overdosed on Viagra?! Hey?

chiefs4me
01-07-2005, 05:05 PM
That's the problem with girlfriends... they always get in the way of one night stands.

Luckily for me, no broad will put up with more for more than a few weeks. So, I'm pretty much always available for some fun.

You hear that ladies? I'm available. 100% No strings attached. Come on down.

Seriously.

*crickets*

sigh


You might get better results if you posted a picture of yourself. And hey,,clothes are optional,,;)

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 05:07 PM
You might get better results if you posted a picture of yourself. And hey,,clothes are optional,,;)
:shake:

chiefs4me
01-07-2005, 05:07 PM
I blow my nose excessively.

Oh and I like to stare at other men's penises. Although I doubt you'll find many girls at urinals.


:banghead: sicko

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 05:09 PM
:banghead: sicko

It's an inside joke, girls. Why do you think they call me meatpeeker?

I don't REALLY like to stare at white men's penises.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:10 PM
You might get better results if you posted a picture of yourself. And hey,,clothes are optional,,;)
I've posted plenty pictures of me. Most recently just a few days ago.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 05:10 PM
Overdosed on Viagra?! Hey?


ROFL

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:11 PM
It's an inside joke, girls. Why do you think they call me meatpeeker?

I don't REALLY like to stare at white men's penises.
yea right, only black mens huh? :hmmm:

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 05:12 PM
yea right, only black mens huh? :hmmm:

Like I said, it's an inside joke. You should step off.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 05:12 PM
You might get better results if you posted a picture of yourself. And hey,,clothes are optional,,;)

There ya go Delt, she just grabbed your croch.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:13 PM
Like I said, it's an inside joke. You should step off.
Bullshit. It's always open season on you. For anybody. Noobs included.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:13 PM
There ya go Delt, she just grabbed your croch.
If she shaves her moustache I might consider it.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:14 PM
Like I said, it's an inside joke. You should step off.
no I will not. :harumph:

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:14 PM
Like I said, it's an inside joke. You should step off.

Ewwww! I'm communicating with a female that isn't Princess Layme or Senator Aboriginal!! Help!

chiefs4me
01-07-2005, 05:15 PM
There ya go Delt, she just grabbed your croch.



Oh really,, I didn't feel anything. ROFL

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:15 PM
Bullshit. It's always open season on you. For anybody. Noobs included.
:deevee: but,but,but, I got over 1000, :deevee:

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 05:17 PM
OK badgirl. If you want to know the story about the origins behind the name meatpeeker, ask someone.

Too bad the search feature is down. The thread might be in the HOF.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:19 PM
OK badgirl. If you want to know the story about the origins behind the name meatpeeker, ask someone.

Too bad the search feature is down. The thread might be in the HOF.
well tell me, then I will know. :hmmm:

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 05:21 PM
When it's just me and my son in the room, I will fart really loud, blame him, and act extremely disgusted.


It's funny. Pisses him off.
Note to self: Take Jenny off of "Want to meet" list.

chiefsfan58
01-07-2005, 05:45 PM
Got a perm... :-p

morphius
01-07-2005, 05:47 PM
I can't think of a damn thing.

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 05:47 PM
well tell me, then I will know. :hmmm:

No!

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 05:48 PM
I can't think of a damn thing.
Oh come on Poo ... err Hoo ... errr Morph. I heard you had man breasts.

:D

:p

Rain Man
01-07-2005, 05:49 PM
I have lesbian fantasies.

morphius
01-07-2005, 05:52 PM
Oh come on Poo ... err Hoo ... errr Morph. I heard you had man breasts.

:D

:p
Well, if you believe everything that Phobia says, you are going to start acting like goatcheese any second.

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 05:54 PM
Well, if you believe everything that Phobia says, you are going to start acting like goatcheese any second.
Oh sure, I give ya a little shit and you kick me in the balls! :cuss:

:p

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 05:55 PM
I have lesbian fantasies.

You wish you were a man?

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 05:57 PM
Well, if you believe everything that Phobia says, you are going to start acting like goatcheese any second.

Who said I believe everything Phil says?

He once told me I was banned.

tommykat
01-07-2005, 05:57 PM
Not really.

Bob Dole usually launches in to the problem arising from having an unusually large penis that tends to scare women.

:spock:ROFL

tommykat
01-07-2005, 05:59 PM
Can't really come up with anything substantial, but I have stopped and asked directions before. Does that count?

That actually counts as........Tammy yelling at you enough that you learned....;)

PastorMikH
01-07-2005, 06:00 PM
well tell me, then I will know. :hmmm:



He got on here one night and put up a post about checking out some dude at a urinal. You're an adult, that should be enough for you to connect the dots.

PastorMikH
01-07-2005, 06:01 PM
That actually counts as........Tammy yelling at you enough that you learned....;)



Her yelling at me would also explain her fat lip then wouldn't it?:fire:




(Disclaimer: The Pastor does not condone spousal abuse. He does however condone typing things that will get TK stirred up.)

tommykat
01-07-2005, 06:02 PM
Her yelling at me would also explain her fat lip then wouldn't it?:fire:

I thought that was botox...........ROFL

Calcountry
01-07-2005, 06:06 PM
As your average straight male I wonder what feminine (gay-ish) habits some of you other manly men may have, or if your a lady what kind of manly habits do you have? This was brought up today by a co-worker making fun of me for using hand lotion...yes, hand lotion. I told him "its winter and its dry air and you can have dry cracked almost bleeding knuckles if you want, Im using hand lotion." He laughed at me and then asked to use it too. I told him " I also use lip balm...is that gay-ish too????" He said "yeah, kinda." I didnt share the lip balm with him, that would be gay. ;) Whats your most "feminine" habit?
I cry like Dick Vermiel does.

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 06:07 PM
Shite, I almost forgot. I cry all the time during movies.

And I like watching romantic comedies. I won't buy 'em though.

tommykat
01-07-2005, 06:09 PM
Shite, I almost forgot. I cry all the time during movies.

And I like watching romantic comedies. I won't buy 'em though.

I have about 1 nerve left and you are taking that fast...........go away!:banghead:

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 06:11 PM
I have about 1 nerve left and you are taking that fast...........go away!:banghead:

What's the problem?

morphius
01-07-2005, 06:14 PM
Oh sure, I give ya a little shit and you kick me in the balls! :cuss:

:p
LOL! Sorry man, hehe. I have a mean response, but I'll let it slide.

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 06:15 PM
LOL! Sorry man, hehe. I have a mean response, but I'll let it slide.
Hey bud, as long as Im down, go ahead and kick me in the face. I dont mind. :p

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 07:10 PM
Hey bud, as long as Im down, go ahead and kick me in the face. I dont mind. :p
Look out, morph. I think you got a masochist on your hands. You're getting him excited.

4th and Long
01-07-2005, 07:12 PM
Look out, morph. I think you got a masochist on your hands. You're getting him excited.
meatpeeker? Is that you?

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 07:14 PM
meatpeeker? Is that you?
I ain't lookin' at your weiner, just your words. You're the one asking for physical abuse.

BigVE
01-07-2005, 07:15 PM
Is it just me or did this thread get just a BIT off topic? FYI...meatpeeking IS gay.

Ultra Peanut
01-07-2005, 08:32 PM
Weird that this thread popped up today. The people at the nail salon were asking me this as I was digging through my purse looking for my checkbook, and I was all, "I don't really think I have any 'girly' habits."

Wow, so do most of the Raiders players - though there tears are probably from the mace.You're officially the coolest pastor ever.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 09:03 PM
Weird that this thread popped up today. The people at the nail salon were asking me this as I was digging through my purse looking for my checkbook, and I was all, "I don't really think I have any 'girly' habits."



ROFL

Fried Meat Ball!
01-07-2005, 09:29 PM
Bah. Serious cooking is man's work. When you think of a great chef, do you picture a woman? Exactly.

They just leave the piddly shit to the broads.
I know I'm a little late, and I haven't read all the posts, but the "experts" (that some unknown scientist) say the reason men typically are better cooks (aka, chefs) is because men have more sensitive senses of taste and smell... they're simply better designed to be better cooks.

Anyway, I love to cook, too... am currently debating going to culinary school. But I don't wear frilly aprons... just pantyhose!

And I am very lovey-dovey with my cats...

And apprently I use the phrase "lovey-dovey."

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 09:31 PM
I know I'm a little late, and I haven't read all the posts, but the "experts" (that some unknown scientist) say the reason men typically are better cooks (aka, chefs) is because men have more sensitive senses of taste and smell... they're simply better designed to be better cooks.

Interesting theory.

I would've assumed it was just a vestige of the old "men work, women stay home" model of society... with the male domination lingering longer due to a woman who's really into cooking maybe being more apt to be a homemaker.

Donger
01-07-2005, 09:35 PM
Interesting theory.

I would've assumed it was just a vestige of the old "men work, women stay home" model of society... with the male domination lingering longer due to a woman who's really into cooking maybe being more apt to be a homemaker.

I call bullsh*t.

It's because men are more inclined to just get sh*t done. Men solve problems by working them, not by holding a f*cking committee to see how they are done.

Fried Meat Ball!
01-07-2005, 09:48 PM
I call bullsh*t.

It's because men are more inclined to just get sh*t done. Men solve problems by working them, not by holding a f*cking committee to see how they are done.
It's just something I read a long time ago... I don't have a link or anything to back it and I have no idea of the validity.

Donger
01-07-2005, 09:49 PM
It's just something I read a long time ago... I don't have a link or anything to back it and I have no idea of the validity.

Bah! Chicks.

Fried Meat Ball!
01-07-2005, 09:52 PM
While looking for a link, I read a couple of sites that said it was because it is extremely hard work (very long hours, bad shifts, heavy lifting, sweaty) and very competitive... that may be as much as anything.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 09:59 PM
While looking for a link, I read a couple of sites that said it was because it is extremely hard work (very long hours, bad shifts, heavy lifting, sweaty) and very competitive... that may be as much as anything.
Yeah... broads are lazy.

Frankie
01-07-2005, 09:59 PM
While looking for a link, I read a couple of sites that said it was because it is extremely hard work (very long hours, bad shifts, heavy lifting, sweaty) and very competitive... that may be as much as anything.

Hmmm, "sweaty".....

OK I didn't mean that.

Donger
01-07-2005, 10:02 PM
While looking for a link, I read a couple of sites that said it was because it is extremely hard work (very long hours, bad shifts, heavy lifting, sweaty) and very competitive... that may be as much as anything.

Again, bah.

Plenty of women work retail, which includes every ascpect of what you mentioned.

It's the fact that chef'ing is a results-oriented business. And it's time-constrained = men.

Fried Meat Ball!
01-07-2005, 10:17 PM
Again, bah.

Plenty of women work retail, which includes every ascpect of what you mentioned.

It's the fact that chef'ing is a results-oriented business. And it's time-constrained = men.
Now I'm not saying that that's the reason, but retail hours, sweat and work don't compare to what goes on in a professional kitchen... doesn't even compare. I've worked both and they're not even the same league.

When I said long hours, I meant 15-hour days... a hot room stocking groceries or whathaveyou is not the same as lifting boxes of food next to a stove, oven, or fire. The times of the shifts may not differ all that much, but the number of hours worked don't compare, nor do the environments.

BigVE
01-08-2005, 11:37 AM
Wow. Checking thru these posts there are lots of "girly" men around here.

badgirl
01-08-2005, 01:04 PM
Yeah... broads are lazy.
speak for yourself.

BigVE
01-08-2005, 01:09 PM
speak for yourself.


Oh...go bake a cake or something, but get naked first. ;)

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 01:10 PM
Oh...go bake a cake or something, but get naked first. ;)

Look at this sexist pig....badgirl, I will be more than satisfied with only one of the above. Your choice.

badgirl
01-08-2005, 01:13 PM
Look at this sexist pig....badgirl, I will be more than satisfied with only one of the above. Your choice.
What kinda cake do ya like?

BigVE
01-08-2005, 01:19 PM
What kinda cake do ya like?

I was going to ask for a piece of "pie" actually but I thought that may be inapproriate.

Uh...German chocolate is good.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 01:25 PM
What kinda cake do ya like?

Sex cake.

elvomito
01-08-2005, 01:37 PM
i wash my legs occasionally.
my dick smells like old spice body wash and not waffles.
i don't F*** anything that moves

David.
01-08-2005, 01:38 PM
I have earrings on my face :shrug:

ck_IN
01-08-2005, 02:11 PM
Probably my neatness fetish.

I have to have everything put away in its place and put away neatly not just thrown in a drawer. Doors have to be shut. The sink has to be empty. Papers and magazines have to be in their place. I wouldn't say I'm Felix Unger anal about it, but I'm probably close. Coworkers often comment on how it looks like nobody sits at my desk.

I hope they're only commenting on the neatness of it! :)

chiefs4me
01-08-2005, 02:32 PM
Probably my neatness fetish.

I have to have everything put away in its place and put away neatly not just thrown in a drawer. Doors have to be shut. The sink has to be empty. Papers and magazines have to be in their place. I wouldn't say I'm Felix Unger anal about it, but I'm probably close. Coworkers often comment on how it looks like nobody sits at my desk.

I hope they're only commenting on the neatness of it! :)



Weirdo,,:harumph:

Jenny Gump
01-10-2005, 11:52 AM
I drive a peach colored convertible. Oh wait...that's not boyish...

ENDelt260
01-10-2005, 11:56 AM
I accept free drinks from strange men at bars.

badgirl
01-10-2005, 11:58 AM
I drive a 1967 Nova SS gotta love it, is that boyish? :hmmm:

Jenny Gump
01-10-2005, 11:59 AM
I accept free drinks from strange men at bars.

Coincidence....me too.

Alton deFlat
01-10-2005, 12:00 PM
I fake orgasms. No, wait a minute.... that's not me.... who am I kidding.

ENDelt260
01-10-2005, 12:01 PM
I fake orgasms. No, wait a minute.... that's not me.... who am I kidding.
Know why women fake orgasms?

They think we care.

Alton deFlat
01-10-2005, 12:02 PM
Know why women fake orgasms?

They think we care.

Like the old saying goes, "it was good for me."

Jenny Gump
01-10-2005, 12:04 PM
They think we care.

Actually, we are faking that too.

ENDelt260
01-10-2005, 12:04 PM
Actually, we are faking that too.Thinking? Yeah, I always figured as much.

Alton deFlat
01-10-2005, 12:05 PM
Coincidence....me too.

...and where did you say you'd be tonight???

Jenny Gump
01-10-2005, 12:06 PM
Thinking? Yeah, I always figured as much.

Its a stretch, not quite rep-worthy, but I give it a "6".

Ari Chi3fs
01-10-2005, 03:19 PM
well, i pluck the hair between my eyebrows so that I dont have a monobrow... that is to make me look less like Bert.

Baby Lee
01-10-2005, 03:25 PM
I drive a 1967 Nova SS gotta love it, is that boyish? :hmmm:
SS?

BIG_DADDY
01-10-2005, 03:28 PM
I have very, very good hygiene, is that girlyfied?

ENDelt260
01-10-2005, 04:33 PM
I have very, very good hygiene, is that girlyfied?
Well.. the combing your hair... clipping your nails... that stuff's okay. It's your use of Massengil that has us concerned.