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View Full Version : Top 5 things you don't say to a cop....


badgirl
01-07-2005, 04:29 PM
#1 Gee, that's terrific! The last trooper gave me a warning, too!

#2 I pay your salary!

#3 You're not going to check the trunk, are you? (my sister probably said this right before they found pot residue and 16 thousand in cash in her trunk)

#4 Hey you must have been going 125 mph to catch me. Good Job!!

#5 Aren't you that guy from the Village People?
:thumb:

Rain Man
01-07-2005, 04:30 PM
#6 Don't I recognize you from the Rodney King video?

Dr. Facebook Fever
01-07-2005, 04:31 PM
"kiss my lily-white ass you stupid fvcking pig" doesn't go over so well either.


Not that I know.


:spock:

ChiTown
01-07-2005, 04:32 PM
"Holy, shit! I didn't think my Camry could do 78mph (in a 40)." True (drunken) story..

:banghead:

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:34 PM
Let's be positive. How about some tips on things you SHOULD say to the cops.

In some municipalities, "Tengo dinero" can be helpful.

Rain Man
01-07-2005, 04:36 PM
"Ha! You call that a gun? Check out THIS baby."

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:38 PM
In college I was the passenger when my big bro drove through a sobriety checkpoint. The cop asks, "Have you guys had anything to drink tonight?" To which my big bro replies, "I had a couple beers earlier with my cold medicine."

Seriously.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:41 PM
I'm always as polite as can be when confronted by an officer of the law.

Nowadays, anyway.

Bob Dole
01-07-2005, 04:42 PM
Bob Dole had a few last Thursday.

In response to a phone call where he stated, "Do you doubt I am a police officer?" Bob Dole replied, "All Bob Dole knows is that you're a stupid mother****er who is currently wasting his cell phone minutes."

Then when he showed up at the door.

Question: "Do you have any witnesses?"
Answer: "Do you understand chihuahua?"

Bob Dole can't remember the question and answer, but the dumbass got a "What about this situation do you find so ****ing chuckleworthy?"

And the grand finale:

"I am not swearing at you sir. I would appreciate it if you used a more civil tone."

"Bob Dole would appreciate it if some jackass wasn't standing here on his ****ing front porch asking stupid mother****ing questions. Bob Dole will take care of both our problems." Then Bob Dole walked back in the house.

He stopped knocking about 10 minutes later and left.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:42 PM
In college I was the passenger when my big bro drove through a sobriety checkpoint. The cop asks, "Have you guys had anything to drink tonight?" To which my big bro replies, "I had a couple beers earlier with my cold medicine."

Seriously.

ROFL

That's a new one. Did they even get him out of the car?

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:43 PM
Bob Dole had a few last Thursday.

In response to a phone call where he stated, "Do you doubt I am a police officer?" Bob Dole replied, "All Bob Dole knows is that you're a stupid mother****er who is currently wasting his cell phone minutes."

Then when he showed up at the door.

Question: "Do you have any witnesses?"
Answer: "Do you understand chihuahua?"

Bob Dole can't remember the question and answer, but the dumbass got a "What about this situation do you find so ****ing chuckleworthy?"

And the grand finale:

"I am not swearing at you sir. I would appreciate it if you used a more civil tone."

"Bob Dole would appreciate it if some jackass wasn't standing here on his ****ing front porch asking stupid mother****ing questions. Bob Dole will take care of both our problems." Then Bob Dole walked back in the house.

He stopped knocking about 10 minutes later and left.
ROFL

Saulbadguy
01-07-2005, 04:43 PM
slow day, huh?

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:45 PM
ROFL

That's a new one. Did they even get him out of the car?
Yep. Gave him a field sobriety test, and a brethalyzer. I forget what he blew, but he was under .10. Just sent him on his way with a "Have a nice night, sir."

He was being honest, too. He really did have a couple beers with some cold medicine.

I think I was like 19, and of course, drinking while riding in the car. I was scared shitless (I hadn't had many interactions with the cops back then). My big bro told me later he had to quit looking over at the car because the petrified look on my face was going to make him bust up laughing.

Donger
01-07-2005, 04:53 PM
Yep. Gave him a field sobriety test, and a brethalyzer. I forget what he blew, but he was under .10. Just sent him on his way with a "Have a nice night, sir."

He was being honest, too. He really did have a couple beers with some cold medicine.

I think I was like 19, and of course, drinking while riding in the car. I was scared shitless (I hadn't had many interactions with the cops back then). My big bro told me later he had to quit looking over at the car because the petrified look on my face was going to make him bust up laughing.

Wow. Would probably get you locked up now.

I've only ever been through one sobriety checkpoint, coming up the hill from the Plaza on Ward Parkway. I'd had way too much to drink, and actually hit some of the cones they had lined up. The cop asked me if I'd had anything to drink. The words of my brothers' popped into my head and said, "Yep, two beers." He just looked at me and said, "Okay, have a good night."

I've never driven while even buzzed since that night. Scared the crap out of me.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 04:54 PM
I really hate what cops used to do to me, I would be really drunk, back in the day, like 7 years ago, they would always trick me into coming outside my house, then bam, slap the cuffs on me and take me in for frigging public intoxication, hell I was in the house to start with and they would say "would you step outside please", my being drunk and stupid would walk right out the frigging door. This happened to me 3 times!!! YOu'd have thought I would have learned, but hey tequila does some crazy things. :banghead:

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:56 PM
Wow. Would probably get you locked up now.

I was with him one other time when he blew a .098 Cop said he was free to go, wasn't gonna give him a DUI, but he wasn't allowed to drive. We were in Salem, Missouri. The dipshit called the girl he was banging at the time back in Rolla to come get us. She came and got us, but that was effectively the end of that relationship.

The cop asked me if I'd had anything to drink. The words of my brothers' popped into my head and said, "Yep, two beers."

I remember claiming to have only had a couple once. Then I blew a .20 I don't think they believed me.

Here's a tip kids: driving home from penny draft night is a BAD idea.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 04:58 PM
I really hate what cops used to do to me, I would be really drunk, back in the day, like 7 years ago, they would always trick me into coming outside my house, then bam, slap the cuffs on me and take me in for frigging public intoxication, hell I was in the house to start with and they would say "would you step outside please", my being drunk and stupid would walk right out the frigging door. This happened to me 3 times!!! YOu'd have thought I would have learned, but hey tequila does some crazy things. :banghead:
I don't know if anyone's clued you in yet or not, but you should really know... that wasn't really a breathalyzer tube he pulled out the fly of his pants, either.

Sorry you had to hear it from me.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:00 PM
I don't know if anyone's clued you in yet or not, but you should really know... that wasn't really a breathalyzer tube he pulled out the fly of his pants, either.

Sorry you had to hear it from me.
I didn't blow anything till I got to the station, then I asked them what would happen if I refused and they said my license would be suspended, which didn't sound right since I wasn't driving. :cuss:

Calcountry
01-07-2005, 05:03 PM
#6 Don't I recognize you from the Rodney King video?
I'm in kind of a hurry officer, I have pork chops in the oven.

Calcountry
01-07-2005, 05:04 PM
Let's be positive. How about some tips on things you SHOULD say to the cops.

In some municipalities, "Tengo dinero" can be helpful.
That might work in Nogales.

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:04 PM
I didn't blow anything till I got to the station, then I asked them what would happen if I refused and they said my license would be suspended, which didn't sound right since I wasn't driving. :cuss:

Heh. My oldest brother worked at a gas station for years. Said he got more action there than from bars.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:13 PM
Heh. My oldest brother worked at a gas station for years. Said he got more action there than from bars.
The POLICE station. :rolleyes:

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:14 PM
That might work in Nogales.
Ding ding ding.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:15 PM
The POLICE station. :rolleyes:
I'm sure that's what they told you.

But, you really should know that real police badges aren't cloth and sewed on to the cop's shirt. And, they don't say "Conoco"

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:16 PM
The POLICE station. :rolleyes:

ROFL

I did know a gal in highschool that blew a cop to get out of a ticket. She was pretty hot, too.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:17 PM
ROFL

I did know a gal in highschool that blew a cop to get out of a ticket. She was pretty hot, too.
Didn't she know all she had to do was cry?

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:17 PM
I'm sure that's what they told you.

But, you really should know that real police badges aren't cloth and sewed on to the cop's shirt. And, they don't say "Conoco"
thats pretty funny. I'll rep ya even though the joke is on me. Sillly Boy!!! :p

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:17 PM
Didn't she know all she had to do was cry?

Didn't work.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:19 PM
Didn't work.
So, who broached the bj subject first? Her or him?

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:19 PM
So, who broached the bj subject first? Her or him?

She did.

go bowe
01-07-2005, 05:22 PM
I really hate what cops used to do to me, I would be really drunk, back in the day, like 7 years ago, they would always trick me into coming outside my house, then bam, slap the cuffs on me and take me in for frigging public intoxication, hell I was in the house to start with and they would say "would you step outside please", my being drunk and stupid would walk right out the frigging door. This happened to me 3 times!!! YOu'd have thought I would have learned, but hey tequila does some crazy things. :banghead:isn't that how cops get dates with cuties like you? :shrug:

Rain Man
01-07-2005, 05:22 PM
She did.


She sounds very resourceful.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:23 PM
isn't that how cops get dates with cuties like you? :shrug:
Normally I'm the one with the cuffs, but hey they beat me to it. :p

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:24 PM
I bet cops hate it when they've got the TV show "Cops" following them and a broad offers to blow them to get out of being arrested.

Wonder if they turn to the camera guy and say, "Hey... if I get her to blow you, too, you'll 'lose' this footage, right?"

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:25 PM
I bet cops hate it when they've got the TV show "Cops" following them and a broad offers to blow them to get out of being arrested.

Wonder if they turn to the camera guy and say, "Hey... if I get her to blow you, too, you'll 'lose' this footage, right?"
I hate those assholes on those cop shows, they chase somebody down the street, then 2 or 3 has to jump on him, knocking him down and crap, pisses me off. :mad:

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:27 PM
I bet cops hate it when they've got the TV show "Cops" following them and a broad offers to blow them to get out of being arrested.

Wonder if they turn to the camera guy and say, "Hey... if I get her to blow you, too, you'll 'lose' this footage, right?"

One of my neighbors/buddies is a state trooper. He said that it's actually pretty common (after making sure his wife wasn't within earshot). I suppose he could've been full of crap, but he seemed pretty sincere, almost embarassed. He's a really straight-laced guy.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:27 PM
I hate those assholes on those cop shows, they chase somebody down the street, then 2 or 3 has to jump on him, knocking him down and crap, pisses me off. :mad:
The easiest way to prevent cops from kicking your ass is to not run from them.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 05:28 PM
One of my neighbors/buddies is a state trooper. He said that it's actually pretty common (after making sure his wife wasn't within earshot). I suppose he could've been full of crap, but he seemed pretty sincere, almost embarassed. He's a really straight-laced guy.
Doesn't surprise me. All women are whores.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:29 PM
The easiest way to prevent cops from kicking your ass is to not run from them.
:hmmm: I'll have to remember that next time.

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:29 PM
I hate those assholes on those cop shows, they chase somebody down the street, then 2 or 3 has to jump on him, knocking him down and crap, pisses me off. :mad:

A little hint: if and when a cop orders one to get down, by all means do it. If not, one should expect to get taken down.

badgirl
01-07-2005, 05:31 PM
A little hint: if and when a cop orders one to get down, by all means do it. If not, one should expect to get taken down.
Some more useful information. :thumb:

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 05:32 PM
One time I got a speeding ticket in Kansas City. I asked the cop if he posted on Chiefsplanet. He said he did and then I told him I was GoChiefs. He gave me a $500 ticket and said if my car wasn't gone by the time he got in his he was going to go Rodney King on my ass.

Rain Man
01-07-2005, 05:32 PM
I hate those assholes on those cop shows, they chase somebody down the street, then 2 or 3 has to jump on him, knocking him down and crap, pisses me off. :mad:

If I was a cop, I'd just shoot them if they started running. You do that a couple of times, and put a new little 'running man' sticker on the side of the police car each time, and I'll bet the problem would solve itself.

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:33 PM
Some more useful information. :thumb:

Well, if that information was news to you, I've got plenty more.

Like, don't take deep breaths while underwater and sticking yourself in the eye with a fork is unpleasant.

siberian khatru
01-07-2005, 05:33 PM
One time I got a speeding ticket in Kansas City. I asked the cop if he posted on Chiefsplanet. He said he did and then I told him I was GoChiefs. He gave me a $500 ticket and said if my car wasn't gone by the time he got in his he was going to go Rodney King on my ass.

Bullshit. You blew him and you know it.

Count Zarth
01-07-2005, 05:34 PM
Bullshit. You blew him and you know it.

No he just asked me to take a peek.

Donger
01-07-2005, 05:34 PM
One time I got a speeding ticket in Kansas City. I asked the cop if he posted on Chiefsplanet. He said he did and then I told him I was GoChiefs. He gave me a $500 ticket and said if my car wasn't gone by the time he got in his he was going to go Rodney King on my ass.

You got off lucky. He was probably tempted to shoot you in the head and plant a gun in your hand.

LiL stumppy
01-07-2005, 07:02 PM
Normally I'm the one with the cuffs, but hey they beat me to it. :p

:shake: wow

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 07:03 PM
:shake: wow
Nothin' like finding out Dad's gf is a freak on a public bb, huh?

LiL stumppy
01-07-2005, 07:05 PM
I need to stop coming here...

LiL stumppy
01-07-2005, 07:07 PM
The easiest way to prevent cops from kicking your ass is to not run from them.

You may have to explain that better for her :p

Donger
01-07-2005, 07:08 PM
I need to stop coming here...

And your dad needs to stop coming there.

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 07:11 PM
Well, if that information was news to you, I've got plenty more.

Like, don't take deep breaths while underwater and sticking yourself in the eye with a fork is unpleasant.
A spork is even worse.

LiL stumppy
01-07-2005, 07:12 PM
And your dad needs to stop coming there.

Wow,honestly stop talking.Please. :rolleyes:

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 07:15 PM
And your dad needs to stop coming there.
ROFL

Uncle_Ted
01-07-2005, 07:40 PM
"I'd like a double cheeseburger, a supersize order of fries, and a large Coke."

Frazod
01-07-2005, 07:40 PM
Cop: Have you been drinking?

Me: No. Have you?

And obviously, I got the ticket.

Thieving bastard! :cuss:

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 07:49 PM
Cop: Have you been drinking?

Me: No. Have you?

And obviously, I got the ticket.

Thieving bastard! :cuss:
Heh.

I was once pulled over about 10am and the cop asked me how much I had to drink.

I was on my way home from an ex-gf's place, where I had spent the previous night... after much, much boozing. (Like 9 hours worth or so, IIRC) Anyway, I hadn't showered or brushed my teeth yet, so I'm sure I reeked of booze. I told him, no, I hadn't been drinking that morning, and explained the situation. He asked what time I quit drinking the night before. "Well, 1:30... when the bar closed." Glad he didn't ask me what time I started... I likely would've been too stupid to lie and would've blurted out, "Oh, 'bout 3pm" without thinking about it. Hell, for that matter, I'm kinda surprised he didn't ask about how my truck got from the bar over to the ex-gf's house...

Frazod
01-07-2005, 07:54 PM
Heh.

I was once pulled over about 10am and the cop asked me how much I had to drink.

I was on my way home from an ex-gf's place, where I had spent the previous night... after much, much boozing. (Like 9 hours worth or so, IIRC) Anyway, I hadn't showered or brushed my teeth yet, so I'm sure I reeked of booze. I told him, no, I hadn't been drinking that morning, and explained the situation. He asked what time I quit drinking the night before. "Well, 1:30... when the bar closed." Glad he didn't ask me what time I started... I likely would've been too stupid to lie and would've blurted out, "Oh, 'bout 3pm" without thinking about it. Hell, for that matter, I'm kinda surprised he didn't ask about how my truck got from the bar over to the ex-gf's house...

I've never been pulled over drunk (or post-drunk), although how I avoided it I don't know. I've gotten lots of tickets, but they were all for speeding - generally out in the middle of f#cking nowhere.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 07:56 PM
I've never been pulled over drunk (or post-drunk), although how I avoided it I don't know. I've gotten lots of tickets, but they were all for speeding - generally out in the middle of f#cking nowhere.
I never got pulled over drunk (amazingly), but I got followed home.

I'll never forget that stream of emotions... park in my spot... "Holy shit, I made it. I can't believe it." notice cop parked behind me in my rear view mirror.... "Well, f*ck. I'm going to jail."

Frazod
01-07-2005, 07:59 PM
I never got pulled over drunk (amazingly), but I got followed home.

I'll never forget that stream of emotions... park in my spot... "Holy shit, I made it. I can't believe it." notice cop parked behind me in my rear view mirror.... "Well, f*ck. I'm going to jail."

What did he do?

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:01 PM
What did he do?
Uh, he arrested me. That's when I got my DUI.

Frazod
01-07-2005, 08:02 PM
Uh, he arrested me. That's when I got my DUI.

Oops. :doh!:

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:03 PM
Oops. :doh!:
Yeah.

What was really shitty was the bar I was coming home from was really close to my apt. On future drinking trips there, I found out it was a $5 cab ride home.

Five f*cking dollars.

Yeah, I'm a genius.

Frazod
01-07-2005, 08:07 PM
Yeah.

What was really shitty was the bar I was coming home from was really close to my apt. On future drinking trips there, I found out it was a $5 cab ride home.

Five f*cking dollars.

Yeah, I'm a genius.

You still feeling the effects of that?

Amnorix
01-07-2005, 08:09 PM
Yeah.

What was really shitty was the bar I was coming home from was really close to my apt. On future drinking trips there, I found out it was a $5 cab ride home.

Five f*cking dollars.

Yeah, I'm a genius.

ROFLROFLROFLROFL

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 08:12 PM
Uh, he arrested me. That's when I got my DUI.
You made it all the way home and got a DUI right out in front of your house? Wild.

CosmicPal
01-07-2005, 08:13 PM
Yeah.

What was really shitty was the bar I was coming home from was really close to my apt. On future drinking trips there, I found out it was a $5 cab ride home.

Five f*cking dollars.

Yeah, I'm a genius.

Yep....

I've been pulled over fifty million times- two DUI's out of it all- both when I was under 21 and living in KC.

It's not worth the trouble to try to drive any more. If a bar is within walking distance today, it's good enough for me. Special occasions usually find me as a passenger in someone else's car OR a cab ride home.

We now have this outfit in Denver where you can pay these guys, Knight Riders, $25, and they will drive you home in YOUR CAR!

Freakin' sweet...now I can get all trashy and pick up some whore and pay some dude to drive us to my house while I fumble with her in the backseat of my own car...it's like being in high school all over again

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:14 PM
You still feeling the effects of that?
Eh, not really. If I were to get another within 5 years, the penalties are stiffer... I'm still in that five year window.. but, I don't plan to get another.

I think the points expired off my license after two years (a DUI maxes it out, any ticket I got after that and my license would've been gone), but I'm not sure. I suppose if I were to get a speeding ticket or something, I'd just call a lawyer and find out.

It may or may not be affecting my insurance... I sure never called my agent and told him what happened. Actually, when I got arrested was right after I moved to AZ. I didn't even have AZ car insurance yet (I previously had Shelter, and they don't operate in AZ). So, a couple days after the arrest I went down and bought car insurance right away... before it hit my record. So, I could at least get six months at pre-DUI rates (course, I totalled a truck in college, so that was still ridiculously high). I figured when they renewed it every six months they'd just re-run my record, but a college buddy of mine that is now an agent for the insurance company I have a policy with says that isn't necessarily what happens. Sometimes folks get away with something on their record for years. My next renewal was a little more expensive, but only a couple hundred. I sure wasn't going to call my agent at that point and say, "Hey, did you get that DUI on there?" I just wrote the check and kept my mouth shut. After five years have passed, if I don't like my insurance premium I may ask about it. But, I'll be damned if I'm making any changes to my car insurance before that happens.

CosmicPal
01-07-2005, 08:16 PM
You made it all the way home and got a DUI right out in front of your house? Wild.

When I was in rehab, one of the guys told me he got busted when he and his brother had been working on his car all day while drinking beer. That afternoon when they wanted to test the car, they simply pulled it out of the driveway just as a cop was driving by...needless to say, the cop pulled them over and that's how he ended up in rehab.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:16 PM
Yep....

I've been pulled over fifty million times- two DUI's out of it all- both when I was under 21 and living in KC.

It's not worth the trouble to try to drive any more. If a bar is within walking distance today, it's good enough for me. Special occasions usually find me as a passenger in someone else's car OR a cab ride home.

We now have this outfit in Denver where you can pay these guys, Knight Riders, $25, and they will drive you home in YOUR CAR!

Freakin' sweet...now I can get all trashy and pick up some whore and pay some dude to drive us to my house while I fumble with her in the backseat of my own car...it's like being in high school all over again
There's cab companies in Phoenix that'll give you a free ride back to the bar to pick up your car the next day.

I swear one time I heard Keitz talking about a tow service in KC that would come to the bar, pick you and your car up, and take the both of yas home. Riding home with a broad in the cab of a tow truck probably isn't as conducive to fooling around as your scenario, tho.

CosmicPal
01-07-2005, 08:19 PM
Eh, not really. If I were to get another within 5 years, the penalties are stiffer... I'm still in that five year window.. but, I don't plan to get another.

I think the points expired off my license after two years (a DUI maxes it out, any ticket I got after that and my license would've been gone), but I'm not sure.

After five years, you have to pay your attorney to get that DUI removed- and that is ONLY if you don't have a moving violation or of course, another DUI within that five year window.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:19 PM
When I was in rehab, one of the guys told me he got busted when he and his brother had been working on his car all day while drinking beer. That afternoon when they wanted to test the car, they simply pulled it out of the driveway just as a cop was driving by...needless to say, the cop pulled them over and that's how he ended up in rehab.
I used to know all kinds of f*cked up stories. As the years have gone by, memory has faded.

One guy I was in alcohol treatment classes with got his DUI from a horse cop. He was sitting in traffic on Mill Ave (where all the college bars are in Tempe) and the guy in the passenger seat starting puking the floorboard. Happened to be a cop on a horse next to them... he saw this, and had his PC. Bam, DUI.

I met another guy who got his when some jerkoff ran a red light and t-boned him. Imagine that... he didn't even break a traffic rule.. someone else f*cked up, and he ends up with a DUI as a result. I told him if I was hammered and some other dude hit me, and he was at fault, I'd probably have an assault charge on top of everything else.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:22 PM
After five years, you have to pay your attorney to get that DUI removed- and that is ONLY if you don't have a moving violation or of course, another DUI within that five year window.
Perhaps in Colorado.

My DUI conviction has already been "expunged". Happened six months afterwards, IIRC, when I kept my record clean. Lawyer didn't charge me any extra for it... included it in the original price. Just told me to call him in six months and he'd take care of it. That's exactly what happened.

The expunged thing doesn't really buy me anything, tho. The DUI is still on the books somewhere.. if I get another within 5 years, I get the penalties for a second DUI in a 5 year span. When the 5 years are up, I don't have to take any action. Course, by then, AZ could change their laws again.

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 08:24 PM
Why not pick up a sober chick so she can drive you home in your car.....oh, wait....nevermind.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 08:25 PM
got his DUI from a horse cop.


ROFL ROFL That would be worth it just to tell the Grandkids.

Lzen
01-07-2005, 08:26 PM
When I was about 18, I lived in this house with about 6 or 7 other guys. It was like Animal House, parties pretty much every night and big parties on the weekends. Anyway, I was taking some friends home who lived across town. I was probably more stoned than anything but, I'm sure I was plenty over the limit.

I just happened to drive by some cops who were looking around some buildings in N. Topeka with their spotlights. This was only a couple blocks away from our house.

They followed me over the bridge and then pulled me over. I was scared shitless but I tried to act cool. To my surprise, the cop came back with my license and let me go. They were looking for someone who robbed some place around where they were looking with their spotlights.

Only time I was ever pulled over while under the influence. Don't ask me how I got out of it, though.

Another funny thing about that house: I remember one big party we had. There was about 10-12 cop cars just waiting down the street (both ways) for anyone driving home from the party. I was so glad that I lived there and didn't have to drive anywhere. :D

Dartgod
01-07-2005, 08:26 PM
I met another guy who got his when some jerkoff ran a red light and t-boned him. Imagine that... he didn't even break a traffic rule.. someone else f*cked up, and he ends up with a DUI as a result. I told him if I was hammered and some other dude hit me, and he was at fault, I'd probably have an assault charge on top of everything else.
I was on 'shrooms once and got t-boned by some chick that ran a red light. She was so hammered she couldn't even stand up. I overheard the cops say "his eyes look a little funny but SHE'S going to jail".

F*cking ruined a good 'shroom buzz, that's for sure.

EDIT: One more thing about that. She offered me a BJ to let her run. Man, that one was hard to pass up, but I knew if I did I'd be the one going to jail.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:27 PM
Why not pick up a sober chick so she can drive you home in your car.....oh, wait....nevermind.
Haha.

Jerkface.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:28 PM
ROFL ROFL That would be worth it just to tell the Grandkids.
I disagree.

Lzen
01-07-2005, 08:31 PM
I met another guy who got his when some jerkoff ran a red light and t-boned him. Imagine that... he didn't even break a traffic rule.. someone else f*cked up, and he ends up with a DUI as a result. I told him if I was hammered and some other dude hit me, and he was at fault, I'd probably have an assault charge on top of everything else.

I was riding in a car with a couple friends. We had all been drinking and still had a lot of beer in the car with us. My friend driving got t-boned by some idiot who ran a red light. We were all freakin' trying to figure out what to do with all the beer we had (not only were we drinking, we were all under age).

Funny thing is that the car that hit us had beer pouring out the bottom of the passenger door. Of course, we made sure to point that out to the cops. We got to go after they had their accident report info. :)

ChiTown
01-07-2005, 08:32 PM
Hey, pull my finger...........

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:32 PM
I was riding in a car with a couple friends. We had all been drinking and still had a lot of beer in the car with us. My friend driving got t-boned by some idiot who ran a red light. We were all freakin' trying to figure out what to do with all the beer we had (not only were we drinking, we were all under age).

Funny thing is that the car that hit us had beer pouring out the bottom of the passenger door. Of course, we made sure to point that out to the cops. We got to go after they had their accident report info. :)
Well, haven't you just led a charmed life when it comes to intoxicated interactions with the police?

F*cker.

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 08:33 PM
Under Kansas law, expunged doesn't mean disappeared. It means the record is moved from the public record to a sequestered file that nobody but the gubment can access. It will shield you from prospective employers but not from the cops or any other gov. agency that might be considering hiring you. Felonies never just "go away".

Lzen
01-07-2005, 08:34 PM
Well, haven't you just led a charmed life when it comes to intoxicated interactions with the police?

F*cker.

Lol, yes. Like frazod, I'm still not sure how on earth I never went to jail. Luckily, I grew up and realized doing stuff like that was pretty stupid.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 08:34 PM
I disagree.

Just be glad you're not in Kansas. A few years back they changed the law so that they NEVER drop off your record. And any you had previous to the law that had dropped off your record, are now back on your record.

CosmicPal
01-07-2005, 08:34 PM
Perhaps in Colorado.



Actually, that applies to Kansas- at least when I was residing there. I haven't gotten a DUI in Colorado. As a matter of fact, I've never been pulled over for anything in Colorado- they're too busy beating people up.

I was in a car with a friend of mine who was on our league pool team. He was an African-American and had only a couple of drinks the entire night. As a matter of fact, his last drink before getting behind the wheel was a couple of hours before we took off to a party in downtown Denver.

Anyways, he gets pulled over. He wasn't speeding. He wasn't swerving. But, he was pulled over by several cops. I sat there in the car watching him pass every single roadside test they gave him when the female cop came up to me and told me I needed to walk home.

They gave him a DUI anyways...I was fuggin pissed! This was a clear case of racial discrimination and I simply laid it out as loud as I could on that Denver sidewalk. The cops surrounded me and threatened to haul my arse off to jail. Of course, I did what any normal American would do- I ended up walking home. I always felt bad for the guy- he was a really nice guy- and it was the first time I'd ever experienced such blatant discrimination...

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 08:35 PM
Under Kansas law, expunged doesn't mean disappeared. It means the record is moved from the public record to a sequestered file that nobody but the gubment can access. It will shield you from prospective employers but not from the cops or any other gov. agency that might be considering hiring you. Felonies never just "go away".
a) That's pretty much my understanding of what happened here. Sorry if I wasn't more clear.

b) I didn't have a felony. Tho, in Arizona, the third DUI within five years is a felony. You go to real prison for that one.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 08:41 PM
b) I didn't have a felony. Tho, in Arizona, the third DUI within five years is a felony. You go to real prison for that one.

We had the five year rule here too but now it's lifetime and any you had before the new law are now back on your record. Not sure how it works for out of state previous DUI's.

Ultra Peanut
01-07-2005, 08:42 PM
"Is it because I is black? You is a racialist!"

CosmicPal
01-07-2005, 08:45 PM
We had the five year rule here too but now it's lifetime and any you had before the new law are now back on your record. Not sure how it works for out of state previous DUI's.

Oh believe me, those dames at Mother's Against Drunk Drivers will be more than happy to get those out-of-states' back on your record in a jiffy...

DanT
01-07-2005, 09:21 PM
"Ha! You call that a gun? Check out THIS baby."

ROFL ROFL ROFL

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 09:34 PM
a) That's pretty much my understanding of what happened here. Sorry if I wasn't more clear.

b) I didn't have a felony. Tho, in Arizona, the third DUI within five years is a felony. You go to real prison for that one.
I think the third one is a felony in Kansas. Kansas wants everything to be a felony.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 09:35 PM
Kansas wants everything to be a felony.

I don't think they're alone in that.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 09:42 PM
I think the third one is a felony in Kansas. Kansas wants everything to be a felony.

Yep it is. I got one back in 81, then another in 83, then charged with felony DUI in 2002. Luckly beat the third one because the cop screwed up the paperwork so bad. He wrote it up as my third it should have been 2nd due to a diversion on the 1st. Thrown out of court. Needless to say after that scare I use the cab to the bar route now, if I go.

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 09:51 PM
"Is it because I is black? You is a racialist!"
Aha!! I knowed youse was black all along. Ise really gonna pick on ya now.

HemiEd
01-07-2005, 09:51 PM
Yep it is. I got one back in 81, then another in 83, then charged with felony DUI in 2002. Luckly beat the third one because the cop screwed up the paperwork so bad. He wrote it up as my third it should have been 2nd due to a diversion on the 1st. Thrown out of court. Needless to say after that scare I use the cab to the bar route now, if I go.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 09:55 PM
Old Town, so are you telling me the one that I got in 93 Kansas is on my record? They said it would be gone in 5 years if I was good. (lucky) They changed that?

Yes it is back on your record. They made it retroactive. Doesn't seem legal but they did it. If you get one now it will be counted as your 2nd.

**EDIT** If you got a diversion on your first it will drop off. Diversions don't count as DUI's after 5 years.

HemiEd
01-07-2005, 09:59 PM
Yes it is back on your record. They made it retroactive. Doesn't seem legal but they did it. If you get one now it will be counted as your 2nd.

ENDelt260
01-07-2005, 10:01 PM
I'm starting to wonder if a DUI is some sort of prereq for joining this board.

HemiEd
01-07-2005, 10:04 PM
I'm starting to wonder if a DUI is some sort of prereq for joining this board.

might be a common thread there they refer to as Obsessive/Compulsive?

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 10:04 PM
Well that kind of makes me a little fussy, the alkjfda;sja! :cuss:

Well not fussy any more, I had the diversion where they make you spend a few months humiliating yourself. Wheew, thanks.


Ya the diversion does not go on your state record as a DUI but if you get pulled over the officer won't see it as a diversion he will see it as a second DUI. DON'T TELL HIM YOU HAD THE DIVERSION. Let them charge you with a secound and it will get thrown out of court like mine did.

But mine were in three different counties in KS.

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 10:04 PM
Old Town, so are you telling me the one that I got in 93 Kansas is on my record? They said it would be gone in 5 years if I was good. (lucky) They changed that?
I'm not sure how that works. Rest assured that the 93 conviction will not "go away". But it used to be that there was a time limit under which they "expired" after X number of years when calculating repeat offenses.

Frazod
01-07-2005, 10:04 PM
I'm starting to wonder if a DUI is some sort of prereq for joining this board.

No, but driving drunk certainly seems to be.... :BLVD:

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 10:07 PM
I'm not sure how that works. Rest assured that the 93 conviction will not "go away". But it used to be that there was a time limit under which they "expired" after X number of years when calculating repeat offenses.

Believe me Skip, they all come back. The time limit is gone now when it comes to DUI convictions.

HemiEd
01-07-2005, 10:07 PM
Ya the diversion does not go on your state record as a DUI but if you get pulled over the officer won't see it as a diversion he will see it as a second DUI. DON'T TELL HIM YOU HAD THE DIVERSION. Let them charge you with a secound and it will get thrown out of court like mine did.

But mine were in three different counties in KS.

Skip Towne
01-07-2005, 10:14 PM
Oh believe me, those dames at Mother's Against Drunk Drivers will be more than happy to get those out-of-states' back on your record in a jiffy...
A buddy of mine got one and beat it due to the breathalayzer being out of certification date. He said the courtroom was full of "Mad Mothers" and he tipped his hat to them as he walked out.

HemiEd
01-07-2005, 10:15 PM
A buddy of mine got one and beat it due to the breathalayzer being out of certification date. He said the courtroom was full of "Mad Mothers" and he tipped his hat to them as he walked out.

What happened to the gold old days when a 12pack was good for a 100 miles?

The Pedestrian
01-07-2005, 10:16 PM
I've heard from a police officer that you don't want to say something like "It's a pleasant evening we're having, wouldn't you say?" Apparently, it's one of the things most commonly said by people who have something to hide.

Fried Meat Ball!
01-07-2005, 10:23 PM
Highway Patrolmen REALLY don't like it when you call them dumb motherf***ers while flipping them off with both fingers either... trust me.

tk13
01-07-2005, 10:26 PM
Highway Patrolmen REALLY don't like it when you call them dumb motherf***ers while flipping them off with both fingers either... trust me.
You know, I might be going out on a limb here, but I think you could replace the words "Highway Patrolmen" in that sentence with just about any respectable profession and it would still be true.

Fried Meat Ball!
01-07-2005, 10:27 PM
You know, I might be going out on a limb here, but I think you could replace the words "Highway Patrolmen" in that sentence with just about any respectable profession and it would still be true.
You're probably right, but my expertise is limited to the Missouri State Highway Patrol.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 10:31 PM
And never pass a cop and fling a half full beer into his drivers side window.

HemiEd
01-07-2005, 10:33 PM
And never pass a cop and fling a half full beer into his drivers side window.

And why would you want to waste half a beer anyway......

Frazod
01-07-2005, 10:34 PM
I'm really starting to wonder how many people have gotten DUIs.

Perhaps Kevin should post a poll. :D

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 10:35 PM
And why would you want to waste half a beer anyway......

Because it was my brother that pulled me over as a joke.

Fried Meat Ball!
01-07-2005, 10:37 PM
I'm really starting to wonder how many people have gotten DUIs.

Perhaps Kevin should post a poll. :D
Never gotten a DUI, but then I've only done it once.

Here's a story that unbelievable (and I swear on all that is good and holy that I'm not lying): I once got pulled over by a VERY upset police officer. It seems as though I was going 72mph in a 30mph residential, while passing someone at an intersection and blowing through a stop sign.

I got a warning.

Turns out, in that jurisdiction (perhaps the state, not sure) that if he'd have ticketed me for all the violations (speeding, careless & imprudent, passing within 100 ft. of an intersection, stop sign violation, and not using a turn signal) he'd have been required to arrest me. He didn't want to mess with the paperwork.

Frazod
01-07-2005, 10:39 PM
Never gotten a DUI, but then I've only done it once.

Here's a story that unbelievable (and I swear on all that is good and holy that I'm not lying): I once got pulled over by a VERY upset police officer. It seems as though I was going 72mph in a 30mph residential, while passing someone at an intersection and blowing through a stop sign.

I got a warning.

Turns out, in that jurisdiction (perhaps the state, not sure) that if he'd have ticketed me for all the violations (speeding, careless & imprudent, passing within 100 ft. of an intersection, stop sign violation, and not using a turn signal) he'd have been required to arrest me. He didn't want to mess with the paperwork.

The best kind of cop - lazy, hungry for donuts and past his quota. :thumb:

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 10:40 PM
Never gotten a DUI, but then I've only done it once.

Here's a story that unbelievable (and I swear on all that is good and holy that I'm not lying): I once got pulled over by a VERY upset police officer. It seems as though I was going 72mph in a 30mph residential, while passing someone at an intersection and blowing through a stop sign.

I got a warning.

Turns out, in that jurisdiction (perhaps the state, not sure) that if he'd have ticketed me for all the violations (speeding, careless & imprudent, passing within 100 ft. of an intersection, stop sign violation, and not using a turn signal) he'd have been required to arrest me. He didn't want to mess with the paperwork.

That is not unusual. Prolly shift change.

HemiEd
01-07-2005, 10:41 PM
Because it was my brother that pulled me over as a joke.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 10:45 PM
We went to a wedding one time in Dover, Deleware. We flew into Virginia Beach and drove up to Dover, four of us. ON the way back that night to Va Beach, (300 miles or something like that) we were having a contest at hitting signs with empties. I do not know how many times we stopped to refuel. Sure glad I outgrew that stuff!


Ahh the good ol days. Heck I miss em. Now you can't even get in a bar fight without a trip to the county jail.

Frazod
01-07-2005, 10:47 PM
We went to a wedding one time in Dover, Deleware. We flew into Virginia Beach and drove up to Dover, four of us. ON the way back that night to Va Beach, (300 miles or something like that) we were having a contest at hitting signs with empties. I do not know how many times we stopped to refuel. Sure glad I outgrew that stuff!

I always preferred shooting signs. I was pretty good at it, too. :bang:

go bowe
01-07-2005, 10:49 PM
Why not pick up a sober chick so she can drive you home in your car.....oh, wait....nevermind.ROFL ROFL ROFL

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 10:52 PM
I always preferred shooting signs. I was pretty good at it, too. :bang:


We used to rope em and drag them down the street with the sparks ah flying. Yeeee Haaaaaa!!! :)

alanm
01-07-2005, 10:54 PM
Why Cop Cars Have Bars

The rather inelegant arrest of a Texas groomsman

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/graphics/art3/0107051inside1.jpg JANUARY 7--Meet Jacob Soto. The 19-year-old Texas man was arrested New Year's Eve when a house party celebrating a buddy's wedding got rowdy. Soto, a groomsman at the nuptials, started running his mouth at cops responding to a noise complaint, and soon found himself in cuffs for allegedly being drunk and disorderly. That's when Soto began making what lawyers call "statements against your judicial interest," as detailed in the below Nacogdoches Police Department report. It's never a good idea to tell the fuzz that you: a) push a pound a week; and b) consider them to be pussy suckers. (2 pages)
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0107051copcar1.html

What would have been a simple charge of Drunk and disorderly and probably a $100 fine escalates into terroristic threats ect. Which will probably net him oh.... about 9 months in the county jail. It's nice to see he dressed up for the wedding. :)

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 10:56 PM
Why Cop Cars Have Bars

The rather inelegant arrest of a Texas groomsman

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/graphics/art3/0107051inside1.jpg JANUARY 7--Meet Jacob Soto. The 19-year-old Texas man was arrested New Year's Eve when a house party celebrating a buddy's wedding got rowdy. Soto, a groomsman at the nuptials, started running his mouth at cops responding to a noise complaint, and soon found himself in cuffs for allegedly being drunk and disorderly. That's when Soto began making what lawyers call "statements against your judicial interest," as detailed in the below Nacogdoches Police Department report. It's never a good idea to tell the fuzz that you: a) push a pound a week; and b) consider them to be pussy suckers. (2 pages)
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0107051copcar1.html

What would have been a simple charge of Drunk and disorderly and probably a $100 fine escalates into terroristic threats ect. Which will probably net him oh.... about 9 months in the county jail. It's nice to see he dressed up for the wedding. :)

Now he crossed the line from having fun to being psycopathic.

Spicy McHaggis
01-07-2005, 10:58 PM
I always preferred shooting signs. I was pretty good at it, too. :bang:

We used to hang out the window and chuck bricks at them. I learned more about physics that way than I did at any class in school.

OldTownChief
01-07-2005, 11:05 PM
We used to hang out the window and chuck bricks at them. I learned more about physics that way than I did at any class in school.

We used to grab shopping carts in parking lots and the passenger would hold on to them through the window while the driver would get the car going around 50 or so and we would let them go and bash them into something like another parked car or the shopping center. I have much respect these days as I've seen the errors of my ways come back to haunt me.

ENDelt260
01-08-2005, 12:22 AM
That is not unusual. Prolly shift change.
Heh... the best shift change story I know didn't happen to me, but my big bro.

Spring Break... Panama City Beach... My big bro is getting a hummer from a broad in his car in the parking lot of our hotel. Her friends figure out, and decide they need to intervene (f*cking friends). Gal sees them coming, and tells my big bro to take off. Drunken fool that he is, he does. They drive a ways, and then pull into some random driveway to get back to business. Some time passes, and a car pulls in behind them. Cop. Apparently, they were in HIS driveway. He'd just gotten off work, and was coming home. Needless to say, he did NOT want to f*ck with two drunk college students getitng busy at gawdknowswhattime in the morning it was. There were some empty beer cans in the car, so he wrote my big bro a ticket for an open container... determined she was the more sober of the two, and told her to drive back to the hotel.

ENDelt260
01-08-2005, 12:26 AM
We used to hang out the window and chuck bricks at them. I learned more about physics that way than I did at any class in school.
A fraternity brother of mine used to tell a story about a "hands on physics lesson" he picked up in HS.

Guess he and his buddies were fond of driving around smashing mailboxes. Their fondness waned the night they found a guy, apparently tired of having mailboxes destroyed, that filled one with concrete and mounted it.

Miles
01-08-2005, 12:28 AM
A fraternity brother of mine used to tell a story about a "hands on physics lesson" he picked up in HS.

Guess he and his buddies were fond of driving around smashing mailboxes. Their fondness waned the night they found a guy, apparently tired of having mailboxes destroyed, that filled one with concrete and mounted it.

Yep, they probably got a physics lesson from that one.

OldTownChief
01-08-2005, 12:35 AM
A fraternity brother of mine used to tell a story about a "hands on physics lesson" he picked up in HS.

Guess he and his buddies were fond of driving around smashing mailboxes. Their fondness waned the night they found a guy, apparently tired of having mailboxes destroyed, that filled one with concrete and mounted it.


ROFL We used to do that too. We would put fish bombs in them and use cigs as fuses to get away. We even put bolts in the lock holes of the boxes to hold them shut when they blew up.

Fried Meat Ball!
01-08-2005, 12:42 AM
We used to make homemade bombs to blow up -- we were all little pyros. Favorites included tennis balls filled with strike-anywhere match heads, powdered chlorine and brake fluid, and shotgun shells with corks/roofing nails glued to the primer ends....


Ahh.... the days.

OldTownChief
01-08-2005, 12:46 AM
We used to make homemade bombs to blow up -- we were all little pyros. Favorites included tennis balls filled with strike-anywhere match heads, powdered chloring and brake fluid, and shotgun shells with corks/roofing nails glued to the primer ends....


Ahh.... the days.

Thank God for the Statute of Limitations

Fried Meat Ball!
01-08-2005, 12:47 AM
Thank God for the Statute of Limitations
That's the thing... as much crap as we blew up, none of it was other people's stuff. It was always our own.

OldTownChief
01-08-2005, 01:10 AM
That's the thing... as much crap as we blew up, none of it was other people's stuff. It was always our own.

None of it was our own, it was always other peoples stuff. Bad upbringing I guess. I'm going to go kick my mom's ass.

Fried Meat Ball!
01-08-2005, 01:12 AM
None of it was our own, it was always other peoples stuff. Bad upbringing I guess. I'm going to go kick my mom's ass.
:)

None of us wanted to get busted... we had too many close calls prior to getting into really destructive stuff like bombs.

Rausch
01-08-2005, 01:18 AM
"Dude, I'm YOUR BROTHER! Let me the **** outta' here!!!" :cuss:

badgirl
01-08-2005, 08:15 AM
You made it all the way home and got a DUI right out in front of your house? Wild.
Well I heard, if you park and turn your car off and pull the keys out the ignition they cannot charge you with drinking while driving, that may have been before they started putting cameras in the police cars, has anyone else heard this? :hmmm:

badgirl
01-08-2005, 08:17 AM
The easiest way to prevent cops from kicking your ass is to not run from them.
Well, smartie, what if that cop has been stalking you for 4 mos then what huh? :cuss:

OldTownChief
01-08-2005, 08:20 AM
Well I heard, if you park and turn your car off and pull the keys out the ignition they cannot charge you with drinking while driving, that may have been before they started putting cameras in the police cars, has anyone else heard this? :hmmm:

The key is to get the keys out of the ignition, BUT If they saw you operating the vehicle to get where you took the keys out, your screwed. Camara or not, the judge will believe them.

badgirl
01-08-2005, 08:25 AM
Under Kansas law, expunged doesn't mean disappeared. It means the record is moved from the public record to a sequestered file that nobody but the gubment can access. It will shield you from prospective employers but not from the cops or any other gov. agency that might be considering hiring you. Felonies never just "go away".
well in TN when something is expunged, its gone, it wasn't a felony though, it was for lying to a cop, I went to a corrections officer academy in Tx and was worried that would show up cause I had been put on probation, and had done community service for it, but when I tried to get proof it had been expunged,they said that they had no record of it, that if it had been expunged there was no record to look up. ****The reason I lied wasn't my fault, it was my X-husbands :cuss:

HemiEd
01-08-2005, 08:35 AM
The key is to get the keys out of the ignition, BUT If they saw you operating the vehicle to get where you took the keys out, your screwed. Camara or not, the judge will believe them.

I had a buddy here in Illinois really get screwed on his third one. A rentacop got him! Did a citizens arrest, and called the cops. He had pulled into a parking lot and was walking down the street to get away. This Rentacop chased him down and held him! Cost him his license for five years!

badgirl
01-08-2005, 08:40 AM
My DUI story, I wasn't even driving!! Me and a girlfriend of my were coming home from a bar, she said Oh I'll drive (I was pretty wasted) so I'm like ok cool, well she said "Oh hell theres a cop behind us, she proceeds to pull into a taco bell parking lot, where she then said "get over here my license are suspended", I was so drunk I'm like "ok" duh, I get under the wheel. The officer comes up to the car and says "nice try ladies", they give us the sobrierty tests and told me to stand with one leg up and count from 30 backwards, I said "hell I can't do that sober, just take me to jail," they let that bitch call someone to come and pick her up, and they took my ass in. In court they officers luckily had wrote that they seen us change seats after the car was parked, the dropped the charge to a public intoxication, but I still had to do 48 hrs in the slapper and community service. I am glad those days are freaking gone!!! :(

CosmicPal
01-08-2005, 09:22 AM
The officer comes up to the car and says "nice try ladies", they give us the sobrierty tests and told me to stand with one leg up and count from 30 backwards, I said "hell I can't do that sober, just take me to jail"

Well, that was one of many mistakes you made there...never tell them to just take you to jail.

I had a major knee injury while skiing in Colorado years ago. Every time they pull me over, and I've been pulled over quite a bit, they request I walk a straight line. I simply inform them of my knees and every single time, they say, "OK" and give me another sobriety test- usually the pen.

One time though, I was so drunk the cop asked me to walk a straight line and I blurted out, "Ahhh, I couldn't even do dat when I'm sober." :banghead:

Fortunately, I perked up after my error and corrected myself and told them I'd be happy to take any of the other tests and ended up passing every single one of them. They shook their heads and let me go...

badgirl
01-08-2005, 09:25 AM
Well, that was one of many mistakes you made there...never tell them to just take you to jail.

I had a major knee injury while skiing in Colorado years ago. Every time they pull me over, and I've been pulled over quite a bit, they request I walk a straight line. I simply inform them of my knees and every single time, they say, "OK" and give me another sobriety test- usually the pen.

One time though, I was so drunk the cop asked me to walk a straight line and I blurted out, "Ahhh, I couldn't even do dat when I'm sober." :banghead:

Fortunately, I perked up after my error and corrected myself and told them I'd be happy to take any of the other tests and ended up passing every single one of them. They shook their heads and let me go...
I couldn't have passed none of their test, straight line, touch my nose nothing, I had been drinking Jaugameister. (probably not right) AND long island ice teas, they knew I was drunk I knew it, might as well not waster my time, I already knew I was going to jail. :deevee:

CosmicPal
01-08-2005, 09:37 AM
I couldn't have passed none of their test, straight line, touch my nose nothing, I had been drinking Jaugameister. (probably not right) AND long island ice teas, they knew I was drunk I knew it, might as well not waster my time, I already knew I was going to jail. :deevee:

Ok...that may be the case, BUT you should have told the officer the fact- and the simple fact is this- You weren't driving the vehicle! AND you're friend, who was driving on a suspended license, should have not been driving the vehicle. I'm not trying to harp on you here, and I know it's in the past and should be forgotten, but seriously- some people ultimately get themselves in so much more trouble than they already are.

I know this much is true- if my friend pulled over my car and then said, "Quick! Take the wheel...I've got a suspened license." I'd say, "Tough Sh*t! You knowingly took over MY vehicle without informing me of your suspended license. I'm not taking the hit for you."

badgirl
01-08-2005, 09:42 AM
Ok...that may be the case, BUT you should have told the officer the fact- and the simple fact is this- You weren't driving the vehicle! AND you're friend, who was driving on a suspended license, should have not been driving the vehicle. I'm not trying to harp on you here, and I know it's in the past and should be forgotten, but seriously- some people ultimately get themselves in so much more trouble than they already are.

I know this much is true- if my friend pulled over my car and then said, "Quick! Take the wheel...I've got a suspened license." I'd say, "Tough Sh*t! You knowingly took over MY vehicle without informing me of your suspended license. I'm not taking the hit for you."
I agree that was really stupid, I must have actually thought they wouldn't take me to jail :rolleyes: I called her before my court date to see if she would show up and tell them what happened duh, yea right, thankfully the cops wrote it in their report, so it didn't affect my license, I was ok with doing the 48 hrs, and keep my license without a record. I have had my license for 22 years and all I got is one speeding ticket, thats all i got caught with, as stupid as I have been in the past, this shocks me when I think of it. :sulk:

Idahojim
01-08-2005, 09:49 AM
Your eyes are glazed, sir. Have you been eating donuts?

Skip Towne
01-08-2005, 09:53 AM
I agree that was really stupid, I must have actually thought they wouldn't take me to jail :rolleyes: I called her before my court date to see if she would show up and tell them what happened duh, yea right, thankfully the cops wrote it in their report, so it didn't affect my license, I was ok with doing the 48 hrs, and keep my license without a record. I have had my license for 22 years and all I got is one speeding ticket, thats all i got caught with, as stupid as I have been in the past, this shocks me when I think of it. :sulk:
Why did they come to your house three times to lure you out of the house?

badgirl
01-08-2005, 09:56 AM
Why did they come to your house three times to lure you out of the house?
loud music, loud people that kinda crap, nosey neighbors, my kids were gone everyother weekend and 1 month of the summer and I had some parties, nothing bad just people getting together, not fighting and crap, oh and it didn't help the chief of police was my next door neighbor, as I said nosey ass neighbors always thinking they need sleep on Saturday night. Now I see where they were coming from. ZZZ

Skip Towne
01-08-2005, 09:58 AM
loud music, loud people that kinda crap, nosey neighbors, my kids were gone everyother weekend and 1 month of the summer and I had some parties, nothing bad just people getting together, not fighting and crap, oh and it didn't help the chief of police was my next door neighbor, as I said nosey ass neighbors always thinking they need sleep on Saturday night. Now I see where they were coming from. ZZZ
You really ARE a badgirl. :p

badgirl
01-08-2005, 10:01 AM
You really ARE a badgirl. :p
Oh I am just badgirl, I used to be REALLY BadGirl. Not a bad person, just always seemed to get caught in every damn thing I tried to do. I don't do anything now to get caught, I'm surprised I'm still breathing half the time. ROFL

CosmicPal
01-08-2005, 10:02 AM
loud music, loud people that kinda crap, nosey neighbors, my kids were gone everyother weekend and 1 month of the summer and I had some parties, nothing bad just people getting together, not fighting and crap, oh and it didn't help the chief of police was my next door neighbor, as I said nosey ass neighbors always thinking they need sleep on Saturday night. Now I see where they were coming from. ZZZ

I remember living in Mission, years ago, with a couple of buddies. We rented out this beautiful house, but we lived next to the worst freakin neighbor possible. We had a couple of parties and she'd call the cops on us each time. And it didn't stop there- hell, if we even had a girlfriend or just a friend come by for a visit- it was a party to her and she would call the police. We were never ticketed, and the police were getting frustrated as well.

Needless to say, a few months later we decided we couldn't win over her and moved. On moving day, one of my friends pitched a load in a brown paper sack and then emptied it in her mailbox. I'm sure she loved that little going away present...

badgirl
01-08-2005, 10:12 AM
I hate neighbors, I was moving a couple years back and i had absolutely no trouble with my neighbors till I was moving my last load of stuff out, it was dark and some people behind my house were shooting off fire works, this old lady came out on her porch and started screaming at me, said she was going to call the police if I didn't stop. Another fire work and she flew out her door again and screamed "Bitch!!" I just said call the law you hag, hell I wasn't doing nothing except moving, Now before someone says something about me calling a old woman a hag, she was like in her late 50's not like 80 or nothing, I wouldn't do that to a real elderly person, unless of course she really pissed me off :shrug:

chiefs4me
01-08-2005, 12:50 PM
Doesn't surprise me. All women are whores.



Just like all men are PIGS,,:harumph:

badgirl
01-08-2005, 01:06 PM
Just like all men are PIGS,,:harumph:
yea pigs, and by reading the other thread "little girly boys" ROFL

chiefs4me
01-08-2005, 02:17 PM
yea pigs, and by reading the other thread "little girly boys" ROFL



no kidding,,I can't believe all the girly girls we have on here. :hmmm:
the panty hose and shaving legs,,ROFL

StcChief
01-08-2005, 04:07 PM
Pulled over on a country road 4 underaged high school grads (circa 1975) about to leave for college with 12 pack & open beers.

County mounty patrol officer pulls us over...

We are scared $hitless. Hiding open beer under front seat of VW bug 12 pack in back seat hatch area.

Officer comes to drivers door.... Asks my buddy for license.

He knows the drivers dad, they partied with him on new years eve.

He says
"Have a nice night. better clean up the beer on floor boards boys...."

Rain Man
01-08-2005, 04:15 PM
We used to make homemade bombs to blow up -- we were all little pyros. Favorites included tennis balls filled with strike-anywhere match heads, powdered chlorine and brake fluid, and shotgun shells with corks/roofing nails glued to the primer ends....


Ahh.... the days.


Are you from Jerusalem by any chance?

R&GHomer
01-08-2005, 05:05 PM
Donít tell a Louisiana state patrol officer.

Boss Hog! You donít deserve an air conditioned squad car; you ought to be on horse back.

Landed me in the drunk tank with a nice sized bruise on my check. He didnít hit me, but pushed me forward on the hood really hard when he was putting the cuffs on.

4th and Long
01-08-2005, 05:11 PM
"Is that a taser in your pants are are you just glad to see m ..." *KERTHWIP*
*B*B*B*B*B*Z*Z*Z*Z*Z*Z*Z*Z*T*T*T*T*T*T*T*

it was a taser