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View Full Version : What movie role were you born to play?


Rain Man
01-08-2005, 05:36 PM
If the producers had cast you instead of some movie star, what role would have been your masterpiece of the movie theater?



Personally, I think I would have made an excellent dweeb character on The Breakfast Club back when I was 17. Anthony Michael Hall, look out.

Skip Towne
01-08-2005, 05:39 PM
Dick Hikok - In Cold Blood

stevieray
01-08-2005, 05:40 PM
Im not choosey. Something in Vegas with Ann Margaret.

4th and Long
01-08-2005, 05:41 PM
Im not choosey. Something in Vegas with Ann Margaret.
ROFL

Bob Dole
01-08-2005, 05:41 PM
Bob Dole is MacGuyver, damnit!

Phobia
01-08-2005, 05:45 PM
I could be Steven Seagal in Under Seige except I run like a man.

4th and Long
01-08-2005, 05:48 PM
I could be Joe Pesci in Good Fellas ... except I have a goatee ... and I don't want to play a role where I get greased. :shake:

OK maybe that's no the part for me after all.

Garcia Bronco
01-08-2005, 06:05 PM
I could be Joe Pesci in Good Fellas ... except I have a goatee ... and I don't want to play a role where I get greased. :shake:

OK maybe that's no the part for me after all.

"I don't know if you've heard. You been up there awhile and nobody came and told ya. I don't shine shoes no more. No more shines for Tommy."

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 06:05 PM
Luke Skywalker

4th and Long
01-08-2005, 06:08 PM
An Ewok
I fixed your post for you.

4th and Long
01-08-2005, 06:08 PM
"I don't know if you've heard. You been up there awhile and nobody came and told ya. I don't shine shoes no more. No more shines for Tommy."
ROFL

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 06:09 PM
I fixed your post for you.

Hey, he never got laid either. :D

I'm not short enough to be an Ewok, either.

Bob Dole
01-08-2005, 06:44 PM
Luke Skywalker

That would explain why your ****ing sister has you pussywhipped.

Freak.

Ari Chi3fs
01-08-2005, 06:46 PM
i was born to play the part of Dirk Diggler...except for the cocaine part and the blowing dudes at the end of movie...

Ari Chi3fs
01-08-2005, 06:47 PM
Also, "Jenna and Nikki Nova Love Ali Chi3fs" would have been a good role.

LiL stumppy
01-08-2005, 06:49 PM
Um I would have to say I would be the stud in any movie with a stud. :)

cdcox
01-08-2005, 06:50 PM
In 15 years, I could play Jack Lemmon's role in Glenngarry Glen Ross.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 06:53 PM
Also, "Jenna and Nikki Nova Love Ali Chi3fs" would have been a good role.

ROFL

Ali Chi3fs is a top 5 GoChiefs poster!

Rain Man
01-08-2005, 06:56 PM
That would explain why your ****ing sister has you pussywhipped.

Freak.

ROFL

Phobia
01-08-2005, 06:59 PM
Why is that Bob Dole post so funny? I want to know.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 07:00 PM
ROFL

I thought it was good. ROFL

Why is that Bob Dole post so funny? I want to know.


Luke's sister is Princess Leia. He pines after her for years, then finally discovers she's his sister. Harrison Ford then steals her away.

I tapped that ass when he was frozen in Carbonite, though.

Phobia
01-08-2005, 07:02 PM
I thought it was good. ROFL

Luke's sister is Princess Leia. He pines after her for years, then finally discovers she's his sister. Harrison Ford then steals her away.

I tapped that ass when he was frozen in Carbonite, though.

You expect me to believe that you boned Harrison Ford? Okay, I do.

Rain Man
01-08-2005, 07:04 PM
Why is that Bob Dole post so funny? I want to know.

The statement represents a nearly flawless juxtaposition of character development in cinematic form with character flaws in real life. Additionally, it represents an astute observation that takes the listener by surprise, yet rings with an element of truth, while also uncovering a heretofore unseen hint of sexual impropriety.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 07:05 PM
You expect me to believe that you boned Harrison Ford? Okay, I do.

ROFL

How did you know Han got frozen in Carbonite? NERD ALERT!

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 07:05 PM
The statement represents a nearly flawless juxtaposition of character development in cinematic form with character flaws in real life. Additionally, it represents an astute observation that takes the listener by surprise, yet rings with an element of truth, while also uncovering a heretofore unseen hint of sexual impropriety.

Run away with me.

Spicy McHaggis
01-08-2005, 07:06 PM
Derek Zoolander, I've always wanted to help people who can't read good and want to do other things good.

Phobia
01-08-2005, 07:07 PM
The statement represents a nearly flawless juxtaposition of character development in cinematic form with character flaws in real life. Additionally, it represents an astute observation that takes the listener by surprise, yet rings with an element of truth, while also uncovering a heretofore unseen hint of sexual impropriety.

Would you be disappointed if I claimed to understand perfectly what you just typed?

Phobia
01-08-2005, 07:08 PM
ROFL

How did you know Han got frozen in Carbonite? NERD ALERT!

Because that's what you just typed.

Dartgod
01-08-2005, 07:09 PM
Bob Dole is MacGuyver, damnit!
No, I should be MacGuyver. I once locked my keys in my car and broke in with an old license plate.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 07:11 PM
Because that's what you just typed.

Yeah, I'm stupid.

Garcia Bronco
01-08-2005, 07:11 PM
In 15 years, I could play Jack Lemmon's role in Glenngarry Glen Ross.

Great movie about sales.

Rain Man
01-08-2005, 07:12 PM
Would you be disappointed if I claimed to understand perfectly what you just typed?

Would you explain it to me?

siberian khatru
01-08-2005, 07:14 PM
Shelley Winters in "The Poseidon Adventure."

Phobia
01-08-2005, 07:16 PM
Would you explain it to me?

No. But I could if I weren't so damn lazy.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 07:16 PM
Would you explain it to me?

I understood every word. I bow before Rain Man's vocal superiority.

Garcia Bronco
01-08-2005, 07:16 PM
The statement represents a nearly flawless juxtaposition of character development in cinematic form with character flaws in real life. Additionally, it represents an astute observation that takes the listener by surprise, yet rings with an element of truth, while also uncovering a heretofore unseen hint of sexual impropriety.

Hmmmm....agreed.

Garcia Bronco
01-08-2005, 07:17 PM
I understood every word. I bow before Rain Man's vocal superiority.

That would be verbal.

Phobia
01-08-2005, 07:18 PM
That would be verbel.

Heh. Any relation to a gerbel?

Funny, but I didn't actually hear anything whilst reading Rainman's post. I'd say you're both mistaken.

Phobia
01-08-2005, 07:19 PM
You dirty rotten typo correcting SOB.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 07:20 PM
That would be verbal.


He ain't speakin.' But he's showing off his vocabulary. So I think it's vocal.

Dartgod
01-08-2005, 07:20 PM
Heh. Any relation to a gerbel?

Funny, but I didn't actually hear anything whilst reading Rainman's post. I'd say you're both mistaken.
Whilst?

Rain Man
01-08-2005, 07:21 PM
That would be verbal.

ROFL

That was funny because of the irony of correcting a mistake about word choice in a post where the poster was boasting about his reading comprehension skills.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 07:22 PM
ROFL

That was funny because of the irony of correcting a mistake about word choice in a post where the poster was boasting about his reading comprehension skills.

Don't make me hit you, Rain Man.

Rain Man
01-08-2005, 07:24 PM
You dirty rotten typo correcting SOB.

ROFL

That was funny because it represents the travails of attempting to make a humorous statement in an environment where the back-and-forth of repartee can be disrupted by retroactively changing one's previous statements.

Count Zarth
01-08-2005, 07:26 PM
ROFL

That was funny because it represents the travails of attempting to make a humorous statement in an environment where the back-and-forth of repartee can be disrupted by retroactively changing one's previous statements.

OK and I totally understood that.

Travails and retroactive in the same sentence. Wow.

In-depth research of past board entries would likely reveal that such stupendous usage of the english language has never been on exhibition before. And I bet that's the first time 'travails' has been used, too.

Braincase
01-08-2005, 09:26 PM
I'd nominate Taco John for the role of Luis Molina in "Kiss of the Spider Woman".

Phobia
01-08-2005, 09:30 PM
Whilst?

Would you prefer "whilest"?

http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?book=Dictionary&va=whilst&x=0&y=0

MOhillbilly
01-10-2005, 12:30 PM
Mongo

Saulbadguy
01-10-2005, 12:34 PM
Paul Allen

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 12:37 PM
Mongo

Sure you don't mean, "mango" from SNL?

MOhillbilly
01-10-2005, 12:39 PM
Sure you don't mean, "mango" from SNL?

4321

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 12:45 PM
4321

:p

I set you up for the Stuart Smalley opening, and you whiffed.... :shake:

MOhillbilly
01-10-2005, 12:55 PM
:p

I set you up for the Stuart Smalley opening, and you whiffed.... :shake:
A) im not very smrt
B) TV doesnt make me smrtr

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 12:58 PM
A) im not very smrt
B) TV doesnt make me smrtr

I know better, liar :p

MOhillbilly
01-10-2005, 12:59 PM
I know better, liar :p

i have beach front property for sale.

Alton deFlat
01-10-2005, 01:02 PM
Meat in "Porkys".

:D

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 01:03 PM
i have beach front property for sale.

Ozark, swampbottom land could be worth somethin' in a few decades...

e_train69
01-10-2005, 01:09 PM
Indiana Jones

or

Be in one of the popular deer hunting videos like "Mossy Oak", "Realtree", etc.

ZepSinger
01-10-2005, 01:11 PM
I coulda replaced Mark Wahlberg in 'Rock Star'.

Or at the very least played the 'pompous prick second guitarist'....

Z

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 01:11 PM
I coulda replaced Mark Wahlberg in 'Rock Star'.

Or at the very least played the 'pompous prick second guitarist'....

Z

Or the bass player in Spinal Tap?

ZepSinger
01-10-2005, 01:12 PM
Or the bass player in Spinal Tap?

Ah yes... minus the tinfoil-wrapped cucumber, of course.

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 01:14 PM
Ah yes... minus the tinfoil-wrapped cucumber, of course.

No "prop" needed, eh? ROFL

ZepSinger
01-10-2005, 01:15 PM
No "prop" needed, eh? ROFL

Nature's cucumber has been more than sufficient.
:)

Otter
01-10-2005, 01:21 PM
Prolly Bricktop from "Snatch" or Paulie from "Goodfellas". I got the young Joe Torrie look going for me.

Not sure if that's good or bad. :hmmm:

Frankie
01-10-2005, 01:47 PM
Bond.... James Bond




OK a shorter version. ;)

Frankie
01-10-2005, 01:48 PM
And.... slightly chubbier.

Spicy McHaggis
01-10-2005, 02:12 PM
Prolly Bricktop from "Snatch" or Paulie from "Goodfellas". I got the young Joe Torrie look going for me.

Not sure if that's good or bad. :hmmm:

I was thinking about going with Turkish but I've got too much hair right now.

Frankie
01-10-2005, 02:28 PM
And.... slightly chubbier.

And.... slightly older.

Rain Man
01-10-2005, 02:52 PM
And.... slightly older.

And instead of a hairy chest, you have a hairy back.

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 02:59 PM
And instead of a hairy chest, you have a hairy back.

Frankie, at an Anti-War Demonstration.

Mile High Mania
01-10-2005, 03:02 PM
Dante ... from Clerks, although the Randall role would fit quite well. Actually, either of those would have fit the MHM before the age of 30.

Not sure which would best fit now.

ENDelt260
01-10-2005, 03:04 PM
Dante ... from Clerks, although the Randall role would fit quite well. Actually, either of those would have fit the MHM before the age of 30.

Not sure which would best fit now.
Who would want to be Dante? He's a f*cking whiner.

Randall, on the other hand, just doesn't give a shit.

Mile High Mania
01-10-2005, 03:06 PM
Who would want to be Dante? He's a f*cking whiner.

Randall, on the other hand, just doesn't give a shit.

Well, now that wasn't the question.. what role did I want to play. Either of those characters would be easy and somewhat fun to play. Let's not make too much of this..

Count Zarth
01-10-2005, 03:08 PM
Skip Towne was born to play the role of the old man who dies on the pot with a boner.

ENDelt260
01-10-2005, 03:09 PM
Well, now that wasn't the question.. what role did I want to play. Either of those characters would be easy and somewhat fun to play. Let's not make too much of this..
Yeah, yeah... and you're not even supposed to be here today.

ENDelt260
01-10-2005, 03:09 PM
Skip Towne was born to play the role of the old man who dies on the pot with a boner.
Sounds about right.

Even dead he'll be getting laid more than you.

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 03:11 PM
Sounds about right.

Even dead he'll be getting laid more than you.

Cue, "Weekend at Bernie's"....

Dr. Facebook Fever
01-10-2005, 03:11 PM
I've always dreamed of a role as "man #5," "bartender," or "taxi cab driver with the hat."

ROYC75
01-10-2005, 03:11 PM
( me ) My wife and kids !

elvomito
01-10-2005, 03:14 PM
Rocco Siffredi

Frankie
01-10-2005, 04:00 PM
And instead of a hairy chest, you have a hairy back.

Hairy chest, yes. Hairy back.... well maybe.

Frankie
01-10-2005, 04:01 PM
Frankie, at an Anti-War Demonstration.
ROFL
OUCH

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 04:03 PM
ROFL
OUCH

:eek:

Wow, I was expecting neg rep....

:)

Frankie
01-10-2005, 04:08 PM
:eek:

Wow, I was expecting neg rep....

:)
Why? :shrug:

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 04:08 PM
Why? :shrug:

Your usual response when I razz you; my bad....

Frankie
01-10-2005, 04:17 PM
Your usual response when I razz you; my bad....

Not so. This was not out of line, tasteless, maliceous or below the belt. I do have a pretty good sense of humor if you must know. :)

tyton75
01-10-2005, 04:27 PM
I'm more of the satan spawn of the Godfather and Silent Bob

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 09:19 PM
Not so. This was not out of line, tasteless, maliceous or below the belt. I do have a pretty good sense of humor if you must know. :)

Maybe I'll just leave you alone over in DC.

That, or maybe I'll just stay out of DC entirely? Eh, nah.... :shake:

morphius
01-10-2005, 09:21 PM
I think I could make a good Dread Pirate Roberts.

ENDelt260
01-10-2005, 09:23 PM
I think I could make a good Dread Pirate Roberts.
Bullshit. Shut the f*ck up, Silent Bob.

Mr. Kotter
01-10-2005, 09:27 PM
Bullshit. Shut the f*ck up, Silent Bob.

Okay, "Woogie".... :p

Rausch
01-10-2005, 09:27 PM
I often feel like Spike Lee's character in "Do the Right Thing."

I think I could pull it off. As long as I kept my clothes on...

morphius
01-10-2005, 09:31 PM
Bullshit. Shut the f*ck up, Silent Bob.
F!@# ME! How the hell did I forget that one! Unbelievable.

KCWolfman
01-10-2005, 09:35 PM
I would love to play the Jimmy Stewart role in Mr. Smith Goes to Washington or Cary Grant in Arsenic and Old Lace.

KCWolfman
01-10-2005, 09:36 PM
I've always dreamed of a role as "man #5," "bartender," or "taxi cab driver with the hat."
Weren't you "guy by lightpost" in the crowd scene of Roller Coaster?

RedNeckRaider
01-10-2005, 10:05 PM
Edward J. Burns role in Ash Wednesday. Good guy with a bad past that won't go away.

Wallcrawler
01-10-2005, 10:05 PM
Peter Parker/Spider-Man

Barret
01-10-2005, 10:46 PM
The Big Lebowski - Walter Sobchak-

Walter Sobchak: Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules.

stumppy
01-11-2005, 12:06 AM
Just about anythng by John Holmes, or maybe Peter North.
My stage name would be Jake Slade.:D

Rausch
01-11-2005, 12:11 AM
Just about anythng by John Holmes, or maybe Peter North.
My stage name would be Jake Slade.:D

Ok, "Stumpy."

stumppy
01-11-2005, 12:13 AM
Ok, "Stumpy."

:D

Ya ever wonder why they call the really huge guy Tiny ????

Rausch
01-11-2005, 12:14 AM
:D

Ya ever wonder why they call the really huge guy Tiny ????

Because he's overcompensating?...

stumppy
01-11-2005, 12:17 AM
Ok, "Stumpy."

Just call me Jake.:D

Rausch
01-11-2005, 12:22 AM
Just call me Jake.:D

I'm not calling you anything, and you're not getting my phone number...

Help! I need an adult! :cuss:

stumppy
01-11-2005, 12:23 AM
I'm not calling you anything, and you're not getting my phone number...

Help! I need an adult! :cuss:

ROFLROFLROFL

Wanna be in the movies kid ????
ROFL

Frankie
01-11-2005, 09:05 AM
Bond..... James Bond!

Did I say that already? Oh, yeah.... Never mind!

Ultra Peanut
01-11-2005, 09:09 AM
Sideline & Special Teams Extra #91 in the "2004 Kansas City Chiefs Story."

cadmonkey
01-11-2005, 09:34 AM
I was born to play Will Hunting from "Good Will Hunting"

Otter
01-11-2005, 10:10 AM
I was born to play Will Hunting from "Good Will Hunting"

You have to be able to hammer out things like differential equations, encryption algorithms, string theory (and so on and so forth) in disgustingly simple and revolutionary solutions.

If your hanging out here with that ability we're gonna slap ya!

cadmonkey
01-11-2005, 10:13 AM
You have to be able to hammer out things like differential equations, encryption algorithms, string theory (and so on and so forth) in disgustingly simple and revolutionary solutions.

If your hanging out here with that ability we're gonna slap ya!


I'm an Architectural Engineer dude, you should slap me anyways!

bogie
01-11-2005, 07:02 PM
Butch Cassidy or The Sundance Kid