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View Full Version : If they named you the next Pope, what name would you take?


Rain Man
02-02-2005, 03:26 PM
Not meaning to jinx John Paul, but I have to ask.

The upcoming poll will include the only 25 names that have been used by popes since the year 1118.

You can also offer write-in votes of for your preferred pope name prior to the year 1118 by consulting this list. http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/12272b.htm
Due to the high tradition of the Catholic Church, you will not be allowed to take a name that has not already been used.

Poll coming, God willing.

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 03:27 PM
Heh... God willing.

Um, well since the poll hasn't been posted yet... of the top of my head I'm gonna choose Innocent. I think that's a pretty cool pope name.

I reserve the right to change if there's something cooler in your list.

Hoover
02-02-2005, 03:28 PM
Pope Omar Tito Santana


Arriba!!!!!!!!!!

siberian khatru
02-02-2005, 03:29 PM
Pope Guido Sarducci

Bob Dole
02-02-2005, 03:31 PM
POPEDelt260

Donger
02-02-2005, 03:33 PM
Due to the high tradition of the Catholic Church, you will not be allowed to take a name that has not already been used.

If that were the case, wouldn't they all have the same name?

Rain Man
02-02-2005, 03:33 PM
Boniface X would be kind of cool, and if I was Pope Marcellus III I could joke about "going medieval on your a**" and scare people. And Alexander IX has a nice ring to it as well.

But to me, there's a clear winner. I'm shocked that no one has snatched up Sixtus VI. That's just too cool. "I got my kicks, as Pope Sixtus VI."

siberian khatru
02-02-2005, 03:33 PM
Heh-heh. I like "Urban." I just imagine some pontiff wearing lots of bling-bling and traveling with a posse.

Hmm, come to think of it, that sounds like every pope.

beer bacon
02-02-2005, 03:34 PM
Battle Pope II

Brock
02-02-2005, 03:34 PM
Pope Kevin I.

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 03:34 PM
Boniface X would be kind of cool, and if I was Pope Marcellus III I could joke about "going medieval on your a**" and scare people. And Alexander IX has a nice ring to it as well.

But to me, there's a clear winner. I'm shocked that no one has snatched up Sixtus VI. That's just too cool. "I got my kicks, as Pope Sixtus VI."
I noticed that at the bottom of the list after I already voted for Innocent.

I gotta agree.. Sixtus VI is a ruling name.

siberian khatru
02-02-2005, 03:35 PM
Pope Eugene:

http://www.tvtome.com/images/people/16/1/92-6938-sm.jpg

Count Alex's Losses
02-02-2005, 03:35 PM
Sixtus VI is cool.

If I was pope I'd ban Jenson from the Catholic religion...then we could have threads about it here. :)

Skip Towne
02-02-2005, 03:35 PM
Well that sucks!!! Pope Skip IV has a nice ring to it.

Rain Man
02-02-2005, 03:35 PM
If that were the case, wouldn't they all have the same name?

As if that's the first time the Church has been hypocritical. Now stop thinking and follow the instructions.

Hoover
02-02-2005, 03:36 PM
Due to the high tradition of the Catholic Church, you will not be allowed to take a name that has not already been used.

So Pope John "I like Little Boys" Paul XXIX would be ok?

Hoover
02-02-2005, 03:37 PM
Why isn't Peter on the list?

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 03:38 PM
Why isn't Peter on the list?
The upcoming poll will include the only 25 names that have been used by popes since the year 1118.

Sheesh. Read the directions.

Pants
02-02-2005, 03:39 PM
Pius

siberian khatru
02-02-2005, 03:39 PM
Pope Marcellus:

http://www.tv-now.com/stars/ving.jpg

He's gonna get medieval on yo ass!

Rain Man
02-02-2005, 03:40 PM
Why isn't Peter on the list?


The last time a pope was named Peter was 67 A.D. Peter Brady was not a pope.

Donger
02-02-2005, 03:40 PM
As if that's the first time the Church has been hypocritical. Now stop thinking and follow the instructions.

Ah.

No wonder my Catholic in-laws look at me like I'm Satan hisself.

Dartgod
02-02-2005, 03:40 PM
You left off Pope Gaz III. I don't care if it's been used before or not. I like it...

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 03:41 PM
Ah.

No wonder my Catholic in-laws look at me like I'm Satan hisself.
The horns don't help...

Rain Man
02-02-2005, 03:41 PM
On the referenced website, I'm very curious why they don't include a biography on Pope Sylvester III (the 147th pope). He must've really ticked someone off.

Hoover
02-02-2005, 03:42 PM
Sheesh. Read the directions.
I CAN"T READ, are you happy now?

Donger
02-02-2005, 03:42 PM
The horns don't help...

Heh. Nor do the Pagan Sacrifice dances, complete with goat-skin leggings.

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 03:43 PM
Whoa... after reviewing some of the older names.... I think I gotta go with Pope Cletus.

Braincase
02-02-2005, 03:44 PM
Pope John 3:16. Or Pope Bobster.




I got nothin'.

Dartgod
02-02-2005, 03:45 PM
Whoa... after reviewing some of the older names.... I think I gotta go with Pope Cletus.
I hear he was a shitty tipper. What with the Nascar shirt, cowboy boots and missing teeth.

beavis
02-02-2005, 03:46 PM
Pope Poop?

PastorMikH
02-02-2005, 04:32 PM
One thing I noticed looking through that list, not many of those guys were pope for long periods. Pope John Paul has one of the longest terms served.

Rain Man
02-02-2005, 04:44 PM
I remember hearing somewhere not long ago that John Paul was 2nd in tenure or thereabouts. I was surprised to hear that, because it's not like he's been on the throne for 50 years or anything. I figured that out of all of the popes there'd be a few that lasted forever.

Maybe very few popes get elected at a young age, so it's hard to last two decades in the job.

PastorMikH
02-02-2005, 04:52 PM
I remember hearing somewhere not long ago that John Paul was 2nd in tenure or thereabouts. I was surprised to hear that, because it's not like he's been on the throne for 50 years or anything. I figured that out of all of the popes there'd be a few that lasted forever.

Maybe very few popes get elected at a young age, so it's hard to last two decades in the job.



I was coming up with him at #2 but I skimmed the list a bit. Looks like Pope Blessed Pius IX (1846-78) lasted the longest at 32 years. If John Paul has another 6 years in him he could pass that guy. With his health, he is looking really frail though.

Donger
02-02-2005, 04:53 PM
I was coming up with him at #2 but I skimmed the list a bit. Looks like Pope Blessed Pius IX (1846-78) lasted the longest at 32 years. If John Paul has another 6 years in him he could pass that guy. With his health, he is looking really frail though.

Not to mention that Pope Blessed Pius IX didn't have a Popemobile like JP does.

Rain Man
02-02-2005, 04:55 PM
I was coming up with him at #2 but I skimmed the list a bit. Looks like Pope Blessed Pius IX (1846-78) lasted the longest at 32 years. If John Paul has another 6 years in him he could pass that guy. With his health, he is looking really frail though.


Six years may be a bit of a reach, meaning no offense to the guy.

Donger
02-02-2005, 04:56 PM
I want one.

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 04:59 PM
Can a pope retire, or do they all serve until they're dead?

Bowser
02-02-2005, 04:59 PM
Heh-heh. I like "Urban." I just imagine some pontiff wearing lots of bling-bling and traveling with a posse.

Hmm, come to think of it, that sounds like every pope.

Yeeeeahhhhhhhh, boooooyyyyeeeeeeeee!!!!!

Donger
02-02-2005, 05:00 PM
Can a pope retire, or do they all serve until they're dead?

Yes. They call it "abdication," of course.

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 05:03 PM
Yes. They call it "abdication," of course.
Doesn't abdication has kind of a negative connotation to it?

Pants
02-02-2005, 05:05 PM
People didn't live long back in the day. If you were 40, you were old.

Donger
02-02-2005, 05:06 PM
Doesn't abdication has kind of a negative connotation to it?

Not to my knowledge.

I actually looked it up last night, after the wife asked me if JP could resign. The last Pope to abdicate voluntarily was in 1292 or something.

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 05:13 PM
Not to my knowledge.

Guess just every time I've heard the word it was in reference to some king abdicating his throne to marry a commoner or something.

jiveturkey
02-02-2005, 05:14 PM
Urban all the way...


Bitches!!!

Donger
02-02-2005, 05:21 PM
Guess just every time I've heard the word it was in reference to some king abdicating his throne to marry a commoner or something.

You're probably thinking of King Edward VIII of England.

He abdicated the British throne to marry a divorced American chick.

CosmicPal
02-02-2005, 05:28 PM
If I was named the new Pope, can I still drink beer in my boxers and warf down hot dogs while watching the Chiefs game on my big-azz Sony?

ENDelt260
02-02-2005, 05:29 PM
If I was named the new Pope, can I still drink beer in my boxers and warf down hot dogs while watching the Chiefs game on my big-azz Sony?
Not only could you do it, I'm pretty sure you could make every other Catholic in the world conform to that routine as well.

Braincase
02-02-2005, 05:38 PM
You do realize that with the Sixtus option, you essentially become Pope Sixtus Sextus.

JohnnyV13
02-02-2005, 06:32 PM
I would do what Pope John Paul I did and combine two pope-type names to create a new one.

Thus my Pope name would be Innocent John I.

Then I would declare that KC Chiefs football games qualify as valid sunday service attendence. Then I would repeal the celibacy requirements of the clergy and become the first pope to hit the singles bars since 600AD

Think about the the hotties that would LOVE to be able to say they were the first chick to be Mrs. Pope in nearly 2 millenia......

Maybe I would then have a reality TV show, "Who Wants to Marry the Pope?" and donate the revenue proceedes to the church.

Phobia
02-02-2005, 06:42 PM
Not to my knowledge.

I actually looked it up last night, after the wife asked me if JP could resign. The last Pope to abdicate voluntarily was in 1292 or something.

That's not necessarily true. Pope George O'Leary was fired in 2001.

Jenson71
02-02-2005, 06:46 PM
Not only could you do it, I'm pretty sure you could make every other Catholic in the world conform to that routine as well.

I don't think every Catholic goes to church everyday...Big shot. :harumph:

CosmicPal
02-02-2005, 06:56 PM
Not only could you do it, I'm pretty sure you could make every other Catholic in the world conform to that routine as well.

Well then, that settles it- My name would be Pope Chieficus IV

BigVE
02-02-2005, 07:28 PM
I would like Adrian, Joseph 1. Joe Adrian would suffice. ;)

Ultra Peanut
02-02-2005, 07:33 PM
Pius. It's alliterative, and it's funny.

Rain Man
02-02-2005, 07:34 PM
Think about the the hotties that would LOVE to be able to say they were the first chick to be Mrs. Pope in nearly 2 millenia......

Maybe I would then have a reality TV show, "Who Wants to Marry the Pope?" and donate the revenue proceedes to the church.

And think about the house. You'd take them to the Vatican on the third date, and they'd really be impressed even before you started showing them the bones of various saints.

Saulbadguy
02-02-2005, 07:35 PM
LeBron James II

DaneMcCloud
02-02-2005, 07:37 PM
Honorius V. That way I could be Pope Ho, for short. All the nuns would be my bitches.

Ultra Peanut
02-02-2005, 07:44 PM
Yeah, that's what I said, nig.Whatever, ho.

Big Chief Homer
02-02-2005, 07:50 PM
How about Daniel Pope

or Pope Onarope

kcfanintitanhell
02-02-2005, 08:10 PM
On the referenced website, I'm very curious why they don't include a biography on Pope Sylvester III (the 147th pope). He must've really ticked someone off.
I had to do it...
"A-A-A-D-R-I-I-I-A-A-A-N-N-N!!!

Braincase
02-02-2005, 08:47 PM
Pope John "Diceman" Gulfstream Bozak the Prime and Alpha

PunkinDrublic
02-02-2005, 10:03 PM
I wouldn't even give myself a name because as soon as I was named the next Pope my first act would be to abolish the vatican.

Ari Chi3fs
02-03-2005, 12:03 AM
Pope George Ringo I