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Spicy McHaggis
02-04-2005, 03:08 PM
You've ever told to a girl (or guy for the ladies) in order to hook up with them? I had a friend who I went to a party in Oregon with who spoke with an Irish accent and claimed to be from Dublin all night so this one girl would sleep with him. I bet him it wouldn't work. I lost.

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 03:09 PM
I would never lie to a woman.

Spicy McHaggis
02-04-2005, 03:12 PM
I would never lie to a woman.

Still ducking the girl you told you were a Doctor whose rich uncle just kicked it eh Endelt?

Saulbadguy
02-04-2005, 03:13 PM
"I scored 4 touchdowns in one game."

Donger
02-04-2005, 03:14 PM
Ha. American girls are suck suckers for foreign accents.

So I'm told, anyway.

* Edit: Yeah, that should have been "such suckers" not "suck suckers."

FloridaChief
02-04-2005, 03:14 PM
What's the Biggest Lie you've ever told to a girl

God, you're so smart--I could talk to you for days...

beavis
02-04-2005, 03:14 PM
"I scored 4 touchdowns in one game."
ROFL

That's quality.

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 03:15 PM
This won't hurt....

Donger
02-04-2005, 03:15 PM
I once told a girl in high school that I was Mel Gibson's cousin. Of course, I can do a damn good Aussie accent.

She wasn't very bright, but she had other fantastic attributes.

Spicy McHaggis
02-04-2005, 03:16 PM
This won't hurt....
ROFL thats wrong

Rain Man
02-04-2005, 03:17 PM
The biggest lie I ever told was to get away from a woman.

In a horrible, horrible mistake, I was engaged to a nutcase back in my early 20s. (She was a well-disguised nutcase, in my own defense.) When we finally broke up, she continued to call sporadically for a year or so. At some point, I got laid off from my job, and it was a big layoff - thousands of people. She called and asked if I'd been laid off, and I said yes. She asked if I was going to stay in St. Louis, and I said yes. Then I hung up the phone and finished loading the Ryder truck for Texas. I guess she never figured out where I moved, because I never got another call.

Joe Seahawk
02-04-2005, 03:18 PM
Back in about '88 or so I was drinking at Swannies with a buddy and some chick thought I was Jim Presley of the Mariners.. I never told her I was, but I let her believe it..;) Good times..

siberian khatru
02-04-2005, 03:18 PM
Back in about '88 or so I was drinking at Swannies with a buddy and some chick thought I was Jim Presley of the Mariners.. I never told her I was, but I let her believe it..;) Good times..

Did you strike out as many times as he did?

Joe Seahawk
02-04-2005, 03:20 PM
Did you strike out as many times as he did?
ROFL

Heh, I took a walk in this particular case..

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 03:27 PM
"I love you"

....I can't believe no one else has said it; rather, is willing to admit it.... :harumph:

Calcountry
02-04-2005, 03:29 PM
"I love you"

....I can't believe no one else has said it; rather, is willing to admit it.... :harumph:That is the first one that I thought of. :thumb:

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 03:30 PM
That is the first one that I thought of. :thumb:

Thankfully, none of 'em ever pulled that "Paradise by the Dashboard Lights" crap on me...heh.

Beatlemanu
02-04-2005, 03:31 PM
"I love you"

....I can't believe no one else has said it; rather, is willing to admit it.... :harumph:

I figured everyone had said that one, so I didn't bother...

Calcountry
02-04-2005, 03:32 PM
If the chick has a rack, you say, "you have a really nice personality, thats why I like you, really. Oh, and you are soooo smart."

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 03:43 PM
Thankfully, none of 'em ever pulled that "Paradise by the Dashboard Lights" crap on me...heh.
I suggest when you find yourself at a bar where someone's singing that song at karaoke, insert some well timed "Hell No!"s. I find it's real popular with the ladies.


Before we go any further, do you love me? Hell no!
Will you love me forever, do you need me Hell no!
Will you never leave me, will you make so happy for the rest of my life, will you take me away will make your wife?
Will you love me Hell no!

etc.

Demonpenz
02-04-2005, 03:46 PM
let me let me let me

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 03:46 PM
Heh. Wrong song.

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 03:47 PM
I suggest when you find yourself at a bar where someone's singing that song at karaoke, insert some well timed "Hell No!"s. I find it's real popular with the ladies.


Before we go any further, do you love me? Hell no!
Will you love me forever, do you need me Hell no!
Will you never leave me, will you make so happy for the rest of my life, will you take me away will make your wife?
Will you love me Hell no!

etc.

Damn; honesty works with some.....who'd have thunk it? ROFL

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 03:49 PM
Damn; honesty works with some.....who'd have thunk it? ROFL
Heh... one time a buddy of mine was all drunk and pokin' some broad... I guess partway through she got his attention and this exchange took place...

Her: "Do you even know my name?"
Him: "No."
Her: "Does it matter?"
Him: "No."

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 03:54 PM
Heh... one time a buddy of mine was all drunk and pokin' some broad... I guess partway through she got his attention and this exchange took place...

Her: "Do you even know my name?"
Him: "No."
Her: "Does it matter?"
Him: "No."

ROFL

Similarly, a buddy of mine...same situation, he claimed:

Her: "Do you like me?"
Him: "Well....I could get to like you."
Her: "Don't bother."
Him: "What? Why....this is....nice."
Her: "I'm just horny; and tryin' to make my boyfriend jealous."
Him: "Oh....good; same here."

ROFL

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 03:55 PM
ROFL

Similarly, a buddy of mine...same situation, he claimed:

Her: "Do you like me?"
Him: "Well....I could get to like you."
Her: "Don't bother."
Him: "What? Why....this is....nice."
Her: "I'm just horny; and tryin' to make my boyfriend jealous."
Him: "Oh....good; same here."

ROFL
He was trying to make his boyfriend jealous, too?

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 03:56 PM
He was trying to make his boyfriend jealous, too?

No kidding. ROFL

Big Chief Homer
02-04-2005, 06:11 PM
Married?!?!?me!?!?!ummm,NO

chiefs4me
02-04-2005, 06:53 PM
Oh honey, I've never seen anyone bigger...:rolleyes:

Darkwolfe
02-04-2005, 06:59 PM
I would never lie to a woman.
In stentorian foghorn tones:

B. S.

:moon:

Fried Meat Ball!
02-04-2005, 09:00 PM
I'm a cornerback for the Chiefs.





It didn't work.

Spott
02-04-2005, 09:02 PM
I used to tell women I was a CP moderator. For some reason, that line only seemed to work on fat chicks.

:)

Barret
02-04-2005, 09:16 PM
I'll still respect you in the morning.

Does that count???

SCTrojan
02-04-2005, 09:22 PM
I know this is a little sick, but a buddy of mine and I had two girls convinced that he was deaf and I was translating his signing into words. He took one of them home. The other girl said she had to get back to her boyfriend. Come to think of it, maybe she was giving me a line.

Joe Seahawk
02-04-2005, 09:23 PM
"don't worry.. I'll give you a warning"

:D

BIG_DADDY
02-04-2005, 09:26 PM
I had this friend who had this girlfriend I really wanted to hit. He knew I liked her so one day he asks me to do him a favor. He really wants to break up with her to be with this other girl and said if I thought I could close the deal to go ahead and try but I had to tell him if it worked out so he could break up without feeling guilty. His girl had always flirted with me so I told her to meet me for drinks after work one night like friends. She bit and long story short I told her anything I thought I had to in order to get her in the sack. That and a seriously steep bar tab later I closed the deal. I told him, he broke up and she hated me forever. Does that make me a bad guy?

Spott
02-04-2005, 09:29 PM
I had this friend who had this girlfriend I really wanted to hit. He knew I liked her so one day he asks me to do him a favor. He really wants to break up with her to be with this other girl and said if I thought I could close the deal to go ahead and try but I had to tell him if it worked out so he could break up without feeling guilty. His girl had always flirted with me so I told her to meet me for drinks after work one night like friends. She bit and long story short I told her anything I thought I had to in order to get her in the sack. That and a seriously steep bar tab later I closed the deal. I told him, he broke up and she hated me forever. Does that make me a bad guy?

Not in my book. Was it worth the bar tab?

Fried Meat Ball!
02-04-2005, 09:30 PM
HELL NO! You're not a bad guy, you were doing your friend a favor...

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 09:30 PM
... Does that make me a bad guy?

You could have the mods change your name to Big_Bad_Daddy, in a show of remorse?

BIG_DADDY
02-04-2005, 09:31 PM
Not in my book. Was it worth the bar tab?

Absolutely, I would have loved to tap that again. After cussing me out though I never saw her again. :banghead:

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 09:31 PM
Bros before hoes.

Spott
02-04-2005, 09:32 PM
Absolutely, I would have loved to tap that again. After cussing me out I never saw her again. :banghead:

So why was she mad at you? Her BF already wanted to break up with her.

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 09:33 PM
Bros before hoes.

Define "hoes"? :hmmm:

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 09:33 PM
Define "hoes"? :hmmm:
For the purposes of that saying, anyone of the fairer sex.

BIG_DADDY
02-04-2005, 09:35 PM
So why was she mad at you? Her BF already wanted to break up with her.

She blamed him leaving her on me, she was furious. After drilling her all night though I didn't have the heart to tell her she was set up. Besides it made things cleaner for my friend and I really did appreciate the invitation.

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 09:37 PM
For the purposes of that saying, anyone of the fairer sex.

Anyone? Hmmmm.... :hmmm:

That must be the influence of being in a fraternity. I can think of a few that might tempt me...though if you are talking real friend, you are right.

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 09:38 PM
Anyone? Hmmmm.... :hmmm:

That must be the influence of being in a fraternity. I can think of a few that might tempt me...though if you are talking real friend, you are right.
It's got nothing to do with being a fraternity. The point is you wouldn't sell out a friend for a piece of ass.

Fried Meat Ball!
02-04-2005, 09:42 PM
It's got nothing to do with being a fraternity. The point is you wouldn't sell out a friend for a piece of ass.
That completely depends on the piece.

Mr. Kotter
02-04-2005, 09:45 PM
It's got nothing to do with being a fraternity. The point is you wouldn't sell out a friend for a piece of ass.

'bro' infers "friend," so I agree. I originally interpreted it as male acquaintance/someone I "knew."

I'm with you now...

ENDelt260
02-04-2005, 09:46 PM
'bro' infers "friend," so I agree. I originally interpreted it as male acquaintance/someone I "knew."

I'm with you now...
It's just a funny little saying left over from college.

Toad
02-04-2005, 09:47 PM
A guy walks into a bar. He asks the tender the best way to pick up a chick. The tender replies that he has a sure fire line: "Tickle your ass with a feather?"

If she responds negatively, you reply- "I said, particularly nice weather?" If it works, then Bingo!

After 10 Budwiesers a woman sits next to him. Drunken, he truns to her and says, "Stick a feather up your butt!" She says, "excuse me?". He panics and says, "Oh...Uh...Sh!tty weather we're having."