View Full Version : Ralph the rooster ..........

03-30-2005, 02:02 PM
A farmer has about 500 hens, but no rooster, and he wants chicks. So he
goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster that
he would sell.

The other farmer says, "Yep, I've got this great rooster, named Ralph.
He'll service every chicken you got, no problem."

Well, Ralph the rooster costs $3,000.00 a lot of money, but the farmer
decides he'd be worth it. So, he buys Ralph.

The farmer takes Ralph home and sets him down in the barnyard, but first
he gave the rooster a pep talk. "I want you to pace yourself now.
You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of
money. Consequently, I'll need you to do a good job. So, take your
time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a chuckle.

Ralph seems to understand, so the farmer points toward the hen house and
Ralph takes off like a shot.

WHAM! !!! Ralph nails every hen in the hen house - three or four times,
and the farmer is really shocked.

After that, the farmer hears a commotion in the duck pen and, sure
enough, Ralph is in there.

Later, the farmer sees Ralph after a flock of geese down by the lake.
Once again - WHAM! He gets all the geese. By sunset he sees Ralph out
in the fields chasing quail and pheasants.

The farmer is distraught and worried that his expensive rooster won't
even last 24 hours. Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up
the next morning to find Ralph on his back out in the middle of the
yard, mouth open, tongue hanging out and both feet straight up in the
air. Buzzards are circling overhead.

The farmer saddened by the loss of such a colorful and expensive animal,
shakes his head and says, "Oh Ralph, I told you to pace yourself. I
tried to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself."

Ralph opens one eye, nods toward the buzzards circling in the sky and
says, "Sh hhh! They're getting closer."

03-30-2005, 02:13 PM
oldie, but goodie... :clap:

03-30-2005, 02:15 PM
lol... not bad

03-30-2005, 02:25 PM
I don't get it. How does a rooster talk? :)

03-30-2005, 02:58 PM
I thought Ralph was just trying to nail the farmer :shrug:

Skip Towne
03-30-2005, 03:05 PM
Roosters don't cost $3000.

Mr. Kotter
03-30-2005, 03:48 PM
Roosters don't cost $3000.

THAT rooster would.

Hammock Parties
03-30-2005, 03:55 PM
How big was the cock?

03-30-2005, 04:38 PM
How big was the cock?
Bigger than yours.

You would want to know.

I could go on... surely you did this on purpose.

Hammock Parties
03-30-2005, 04:39 PM
Bigger than yours.

You would want to know.

I could go on... surely you did this on purpose.

I don't have a cock. Why would I? I don't live on a farm.

03-30-2005, 04:43 PM
I don't have a cock. Why would I? I don't live on a farm.

We know that! LOL - J/K

I thought the Rooster tried to do the Farmers Wife and she killed it... Dam* Women... $3000 down the drain...

03-30-2005, 04:46 PM
His name is F$@kin Freddie and when approached in the yard he points up and says "Sh hhh! Pu$$y."