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Jenny Gump
04-19-2005, 08:10 PM
In a moment of weakness I let my son buy a hamster as a reward for improved behavior. WTF was I thinking? Apparently, hamsters never sleep, or for not longer than 17 seconds at a pop. They poop a lot too. Noisy mutha focker. I'm ready to plan it's demise and we've had it for one day. His name is Elvis. That's the only cool thing about him/her, whatever it is.

Help me. I'm an idiot.

Poll forthcoming.

Taco John
04-19-2005, 08:11 PM
Just let him loose in a park. Nature will take care of the rest...

Katipan
04-19-2005, 08:12 PM
Vodka looks an awful lot like water

|Zach|
04-19-2005, 08:12 PM
Take him to Harlow's

LiL stumppy
04-19-2005, 08:12 PM
dont kill it,its just a hampster

Stinger
04-19-2005, 08:13 PM
His name is Elvis. That's the only cool thing about him/her, whatever it is.




Put some Nacho cheese down on the ground by the railing.

NaptownChief
04-19-2005, 08:13 PM
Just take it back to the pet store and give it back to them for free....No sense in killing it and depriving Richard Gere of a potential sex toy.

Jenny Gump
04-19-2005, 08:13 PM
Vodka looks an awful lot like water

Awesome.

When I saw a chick had responded I was dreading a "You can't kill a cute rodent you heartless bitch" answer. You are a breath of fresh air.

Logical
04-19-2005, 08:14 PM
Just my opinion, but you are stuck for a while. Until your son becomes bored with the hamster which should happen fairly quickly. You could put a little rat poison in the hamsters cage, but your son will be heartbroken most likely at this early stage.

Jenny Gump
04-19-2005, 08:16 PM
Just my opinion, but you are stuck for a while. Until your son becomes bored with the hamster which should happen fairly quickly. You could put a little rat poison in the hamsters cage, but your son will be heartbroken most likely at this early stage.

Yeah, true enough. I am just in the planning stages of the whack, but I tell you, that hamster's going down.

tk13
04-19-2005, 08:17 PM
Put some Nacho cheese down on the ground by the railing.
ROFL Damn, I knew I'd be too late with that one.

HemiEd
04-19-2005, 08:18 PM
Ride it out, it will not take too long. It will be a tough thing for your son when it is gone. Someday you will look back at this as a fond memory I bet. :thumb:

Logical
04-19-2005, 08:31 PM
Yeah, true enough. I am just in the planning stages of the whack, but I tell you, that hamster's going down.
ROFL I don't think a hamster's head is big enough to lawn bowl with them.

Simplex3
04-19-2005, 08:35 PM
A little baby oil on the wheel will quiet the thing down nicely. Other than the wheel squeeking/banging what the hell kind of noise can one even make? It's not like a fart that small rattles any windows.

Logical
04-19-2005, 08:37 PM
A little baby oil on the wheel will quiet the thing down nicely. Other than the wheel squeeking/banging what the hell kind of noise can one even make? It's not like a fart that small rattles any windows.
Excuse the ignorance but don't hamsters squeak like other rodents?

Logical
04-19-2005, 08:38 PM
Excuse the ignorance but don't hamsters squeak like other rodents?

Richard Gere answer: Only if you don't use lube.

Simplex3
04-19-2005, 08:39 PM
Excuse the ignorance but don't hamsters squeak like other rodents?
I had hamsters and gerbils when I was a kid, none of them ever made any noise.

That damn wheel can be loud as f**k in the middle of the night if not properly lubed. One thing most people don't take into account when purchasing them: They're friggin' nocturnal. Duh... :rolleyes:

Logical
04-19-2005, 08:41 PM
I had hamsters and gerbils when I was a kid, none of them ever made any noise.

That damn wheel can be loud as f**k in the middle of the night if not properly lubed. One thing most people don't take into account when purchasing them: They're friggin' nocturnal. Duh... :rolleyes:

Thanks. This is what I get for using a setup line for my own jokes.

Jenny Gump
04-19-2005, 08:41 PM
Excuse the ignorance but don't hamsters squeak like other rodents?

It does when I squeeze it.

Skip Towne
04-19-2005, 08:42 PM
Yeah, true enough. I am just in the planning stages of the whack, but I tell you, that hamster's going down.
JennyGump you are a heartless bitch.....but then that may be why I'm attracted to you...damn you're mean.

Simplex3
04-19-2005, 08:42 PM
Thanks. This is what I get for using a setup line for my own jokes.
Uh, my bad. My incoming-felching-humor-meter isn't functioning right now. :shrug:

Logical
04-19-2005, 08:47 PM
It does when I squeeze it.
ROFL

BIG_DADDY
04-19-2005, 08:51 PM
Feed it to a snake, he will love it.

Jenny Gump
04-19-2005, 08:55 PM
Feed it to a snake, he will love it.

I don't have one of those....yet.

Bwana
04-19-2005, 09:08 PM
Let me know if they taste like chicken. *Shake and Bake*

Phobia
04-19-2005, 09:15 PM
I've found that a hamster can turn a pretty nifty spiral if you throw them in the dark....

at least I thought it was a spiral. My mechanics were perfect.

Inspector
04-19-2005, 09:16 PM
It does when I squeeze it.

Ok, now that was funny! ROFL

Phobia
04-19-2005, 09:21 PM
As I understand, hamsters that get out are attracted to the food which can catch in the bottom of disposal units in your sink. If one of them crawled down there, you'd really have no way of knowing about that in advance....

For that matter, I'd imagine it would be easy for one to confuse a hamster swimming in the toilet for a turd that hasn't quite settled from its maiden voyage.... If one were to mistake that hamster for a turd and the hamster got flushed, one would hope that the hamster could hold his breath for a sufficient amount of time as they've been known to do.

Of course, that's a shitty thing to do....

chiefs4me
04-19-2005, 09:21 PM
Why kill it...how about just returning it to the store or giving it away to someone. Could you really kill your sons pet?:hmmm:

ENDelt260
04-19-2005, 09:23 PM
Awesome.

When I saw a chick had responded I was dreading a "You can't kill a cute rodent you heartless bitch" answer. You are a breath of fresh air.
Nah, Mer's a really cool chick. I always get excited when I see she's replied to a thread as there's a decent possibility it relates to strippers.

Phobia
04-19-2005, 09:23 PM
Why kill it...how about just returning it to the store or giving it away to someone. Could you really kill your sons pet?:hmmm:

Only on an accident.

ENDelt260
04-19-2005, 09:25 PM
ROFL I don't think a hamster's head is big enough to lawn bowl with them.
Haha... just duct tape the bastard to the ground and run him over. I bet a good lawn mower, if you were lucky enough to have the blade hit him just right, would launch that f*cker forever.

Phobia
04-19-2005, 09:26 PM
I wonder what would happen if you glued the feet of a hamster to a bowling ball and proceeded to bowl a strike?

Zach, can you help us out here?

Ari Chi3fs
04-19-2005, 09:27 PM
Awesome.

When I saw a chick had responded I was dreading a "You can't kill a cute rodent you heartless bitch" answer. You are a breath of fresh air.


Yeah, Mer is a dope bitch, fo' sho.

ENDelt260
04-19-2005, 09:27 PM
I wonder what would happen if you glued the feet of a hamster to a bowling ball and proceeded to bowl a strike?

Zach, can you help us out here?
I imagine you'd get asked to leave the bowling alley.

Iowanian
04-19-2005, 09:28 PM
Give it a Navy Tornado.

Thats right.........Flush it.

Count Zarth
04-19-2005, 09:28 PM
Put out a bowl of antifreeze.

Iowanian
04-19-2005, 09:28 PM
Duct tape it to a pack of bottle rockets....

Jenson71
04-19-2005, 09:29 PM
It does when I squeeze it.

Keep doing that and for a longer time. Tell your son you just loved it to death... :shrug:

Iowanian
04-19-2005, 09:29 PM
Microwave

Phobia
04-19-2005, 09:29 PM
Put out a bowl of antifreeze.

I wish I had thought of that. Antifreeze has become the standard answer this week. Good stuff.

|Zach|
04-19-2005, 09:30 PM
I wonder what would happen if you glued the feet of a hamster to a bowling ball and proceeded to bowl a strike?

Zach, can you help us out here?
I would have to refer you to our league administrator for the official answer but score wise it is scored regular. Whatever you knock down is what you get. But you would be forced to quit after that so my advice would be to do it in the 10th frame and do not do it at Lunar Bowl.

www.LunarBowl.com

Ya, I have no shame.

chiefs4me
04-19-2005, 09:30 PM
Only on an accident.



You're asking for it...

Freekofnature
04-19-2005, 09:30 PM
Damn........... I hate tree hugging hippies and find the PETA annoying.......

But you guys are just sick.

Brando
04-19-2005, 09:31 PM
Microwave
Definately...nuke the fugger! They explode in there though, so do it at your outlaws or at the house of a neighbor that you don't like.

Count Zarth
04-19-2005, 09:31 PM
I wish I had thought of that. Antifreeze has become the standard answer this week. Good stuff.

HAHA PHOBIA I STOLE UR JOKE LMAO! OWNED!

Brando
04-19-2005, 09:33 PM
I wish I had thought of that. Antifreeze has become the standard answer this week. Good stuff.
Don't be throwing that in your cooking from now on. It's quite toxic from what I hear.

digi2fish
04-19-2005, 09:34 PM
accidently let a cat get in the house...

Brando
04-19-2005, 09:34 PM
HAHA PHOBIA I STOLE UR JOKE LMAO! OWNED!
The guy that actually already has Star Wars tickets thinks he owns someone. Wow..I think that I have seen it all.

Jenson71
04-19-2005, 09:34 PM
You're asking for it...

Just wondering, how does it make you feel knowing that you've more than likely stepped on and ended the life of an ant in your many years of living?

Iowanian
04-19-2005, 09:34 PM
the Flying Butt Pliers.........thats what Jaz would do.

big nasty kcnut
04-19-2005, 09:35 PM
Easy give it to a cat and let him eat it.

Brando
04-19-2005, 09:35 PM
Hey..Richard Gere is from Syracuse. I demand that you remove that option immediately.

BIG_DADDY
04-19-2005, 09:36 PM
I don't have one of those....yet.

Yet? I have had many snakes but don't anymore, a dog is about all I will deal with these days. Seriously bring him to the pet store they will take it in for free or use it as a feeder. That way your son feels good about giving him up for the new dog he's getting right?

Iowanian
04-19-2005, 09:37 PM
You should have Rich Scanlon crush it with his massive Tater sack.

Brando
04-19-2005, 09:39 PM
You should have Rich Scanlon crush it with his massive Tater sack.
Either that or take him to Iowa...I hear them thar women are fat and hungry up in them there parts. :thumb:

chiefs4me
04-19-2005, 09:42 PM
Just wondering, how does it make you feel knowing that you've more than likely stepped on and ended the life of an ant in your many years of living?


:rolleyes:.....we were'nt talking about a bug.




You have your opinion and I have mine..and you also have a button called ignore.

Jenson71
04-19-2005, 09:44 PM
:rolleyes:.....we were'nt talking about a bug.

You have your opinion and I have mine..and you also have a button called ignore.

Why would I ever get rid of such a huge source of entertainment?

Iowanian
04-19-2005, 09:49 PM
If you're into Cruel and Unusual......

Send it down to Texas, and have DP4Me Nag it to death.

Iowanian
04-19-2005, 09:51 PM
:rolleyes:.....we were'nt talking about a bug.




You have your opinion and I have mine..and you also have a button called ignore.

Its 4 days until the NFL Draft. I don't recall seeing any sign of you on ANY football thread. I'm guessing you're a popular Scat Target on the net.

Logical
04-19-2005, 09:58 PM
Haha... just duct tape the bastard to the ground and run him over. I bet a good lawn mower, if you were lucky enough to have the blade hit him just right, would launch that f*cker forever.

It is really too bad this has almost become lost humor.ROFL

Bowser
04-19-2005, 09:59 PM
Feed it to a snake, he will love it.

Winnah!

Jenny Gump
04-19-2005, 10:01 PM
Why kill it...how about just returning it to the store or giving it away to someone. Could you really kill your sons pet?:hmmm:

Look, I'm a realist. I look at the glass as half f*cked up. Truth is, yeah, it's probably going to die. When? I don't know yet. How? I don't know yet. If I go back to the pet store, I'm liable to leave with a ferret or some other stupid f*cked up pet. I'm just trying to get ideas. I'm all for killing it with the least amount of pain. But if you are asking me if the hamster gets a say in this, then no. The hamster's got no say. Unless of course, it started actually talking. That would be cool.

Brando
04-19-2005, 10:04 PM
Look, I'm a realist. I look at the glass as half f*cked up. Truth is, yeah, it's probably going to die. When? I don't know yet. How? I don't know yet. If I go back to the pet store, I'm liable to leave with a ferret or some other stupid f*cked up pet. I'm just trying to get ideas. I'm all for killing it with the least amount of pain. But if you are asking me if the hamster gets a say in this, then no. The hamster's got no say. Unless of course, it started actually talking. That would be cool.
I had a hamster talk to me once during college. He said, "KKKiiillll ME!"

Phobia
04-19-2005, 10:05 PM
Here's what you do. Buy 3 of the largest ballons you can find (3 footers). Fill them with helium. Rig a basket to the balloons. Just before sending them airborne, drop the hamster in the basket. If he's smart enough to stay put, somebody will adopt him at the end of the ride. If he jumps out at 1,000 feet he needs to learn to fly rather quickly.

In any case, you're in the clear. Good luck.

Phobia
04-19-2005, 10:06 PM
Look, I'm a realist. I look at the glass as half f*cked up. Truth is, yeah, it's probably going to die. When? I don't know yet. How? I don't know yet. If I go back to the pet store, I'm liable to leave with a ferret or some other stupid f*cked up pet. I'm just trying to get ideas. I'm all for killing it with the least amount of pain. But if you are asking me if the hamster gets a say in this, then no. The hamster's got no say. Unless of course, it started actually talking. That would be cool.

Reminds me of the ventriloquist, farmer, and the sheep....

"Them sheep are liars!!!"

Brando
04-19-2005, 10:07 PM
Here's what you do. Buy 3 of the largest ballons you can find (3 footers). Fill them with helium. Rig a basket to the balloons. Just before sending them airborne, drop the hamster in the basket. If he's smart enough to stay put, somebody will adopt him at the end of the ride. If he jumps out at 1,000 feet he needs to learn to fly rather quickly.

In any case, you're in the clear. Good luck.

What if you suck all the helium out before you let the balloons go?

I say drop it in the ladies room at work and position yourself to listen for the forthcoming scream.

Jenny Gump
04-19-2005, 10:08 PM
Here's what you do. Buy 3 of the largest ballons you can find (3 footers). Fill them with helium. Rig a basket to the balloons. Just before sending them airborne, drop the hamster in the basket. If he's smart enough to stay put, somebody will adopt him at the end of the ride. If he jumps out at 1,000 feet he needs to learn to fly rather quickly.

In any case, you're in the clear. Good luck.

BRILLIANT!

I could attach a note to it's foot that says "Searching for Richard Branson".

Phobia
04-19-2005, 10:08 PM
Hey - maybe you can convince the bells on her shoes lady at work that wearing hamsters on your shoes is a tradition in honor of mother's day.

Bowser
04-19-2005, 10:09 PM
Here's what you do. Buy 3 of the largest ballons you can find (3 footers). Fill them with helium. Rig a basket to the balloons. Just before sending them airborne, drop the hamster in the basket. If he's smart enough to stay put, somebody will adopt him at the end of the ride. If he jumps out at 1,000 feet he needs to learn to fly rather quickly.

In any case, you're in the clear. Good luck.

Reminds me of the story my dad told me about how they would take wild feral cats up in the B-17's, and toss them out the bomb bay.

I should have told Chiefs4me to close her eyes first........

Brando
04-19-2005, 10:10 PM
Reminds me of the story my dad told me about how they would take wild feral cats up in the B-17's, and toss them out the bomb bay.

I should have told Chiefs4me to close her eyes first........

For real huh? I've heard that they have women pilots now. I never knew that back in the day they had flying puss.

Phobia
04-19-2005, 10:11 PM
Reminds me of the story my dad told me about how they would take wild feral cats up in the B-17's, and toss them out the bomb bay.

I should have told Chiefs4me to close her eyes first........

Pick "wild" or "feral" - not both. This is so confusing sometimes.

Bowser
04-19-2005, 10:15 PM
Pick "wild" or "feral" - not both. This is so confusing sometimes.

Some were wild, others were feral.

Sheesh! Kids........

COchief
04-19-2005, 10:36 PM
Not a hippy, but assholes like you are the reason thousands of cats and dogs are killed every year. Some dumb twat goes out and buys one for their whiny brat and can't deal with the repercussions. I have had cats now for five years, there are many times I don't want to deal with clawed furniture, nasty litter boxes, or buying food...but I made the decision so I deal with it. You should try it.
Next time do a little research first.

Pants
04-19-2005, 10:41 PM
Not a hippy, but assholes like you are the reason thousands of cats and dogs are killed every year. Some dumb twat goes out and buys one for their whiny brat and can't deal with the repercussions. I have had cats now for five years, there are many times I don't want to deal with clawed furniture, nasty litter boxes, or buying food...but I made the decision so I deal with it. You should try it.
Next time do a little research first.

OH SNAP!

Stinger
04-19-2005, 10:45 PM
Not a hippy, but assholes like you are the reason thousands of cats and dogs are killed every year. Some dumb twat goes out and buys one for their whiny brat and can't deal with the repercussions. I have had cats now for five years, there are many times I don't want to deal with clawed furniture, nasty litter boxes, or buying food...but I made the decision so I deal with it. You should try it.
Next time do a little research first.

Well this this thread could get a little more interesting

*grabbing the popcorn*

Logical
04-19-2005, 10:46 PM
Not a hippy, but assholes like you are the reason thousands of cats and dogs are killed every year. Some dumb twat goes out and buys one for their whiny brat and can't deal with the repercussions. I have had cats now for five years, there are many times I don't want to deal with clawed furniture, nasty litter boxes, or buying food...but I made the decision so I deal with it. You should try it.
Next time do a little research first.Chiefs4me has a brother?

Bwana
04-19-2005, 10:47 PM
How to build a super fantastic HAMSTER gun

Materials: 4 foot section of 2 inch PVC pipe. 2 foot section of 4 inch PVC pipe. 4 inch to 2 inch reducer. 4 inch sewer plug. Electric barbeque starter. Screws, epoxy, hair spray and lots of potatoes that are larger than 2 inches in diameter. One nasty vile Hamsterhttp://platinumchromatography.com/Image/potato_2.jpg

Construction: Sharpen the end of the two inch diameter pipe, so that it will cleanly core a hamster when inserted. At about 4 inches from the other end, insert 3-4 screws in a pattern that will prevent the hamster from falling into the combustion chamber. Using the epoxy, glue the pipes to the reducer, and the sewer pipe end on the back of the gun. Drill two holes across from one another, and install the barbeque lighter, following the directions that come with the part. Note: Try to buy a two-wire push button, rather than a single wire model, as it is simpler to install. Use a nail or bolt to serve as the ground contact. (Canadian Tire has a nice one for about $11.00) Test the distance before you glue things into place, to make sure you consistently get a nice spark.Operation: Insert hamster into the barrel. Using a broom handle or similar, push the hamster down to the screws at the bottom. Unscrew the plug at the back, and give a short burst of hair spray. Note that the amount of fuel is VERY critical; too much will not ignite, and not enough will give you a poor shot. Other references suggest WD-40; try just about any aerosol, but avoid things like liquid oxygen, as PVC shrapnel is difficult to remove. AIM, and ignite. Once you are comfortable with the operation, try target shooting, distance records, and bazooka style shoulder launches. Our best shot is about 650 feet.

COchief
04-19-2005, 10:49 PM
Let it loose in the back yard wilderness [ 2 ] 8.00%
Fed-Ex it to Richard Gere signed "Love, the Dalai Lama" [ 6 ] 24.00%
Accidentally feed it some yummy rat poison snacks [ 2 ] 8.00%
You bought the damn thing, put up with it [ 13 ] * 52.00%
Ask Gaz. He knows everything. [ 2 ] 8.00%


The poll speaks for itself, I'm just man enough to say it.

Simplex3
04-19-2005, 11:00 PM
I still haven't heard what kind of noise the damned thing is making. You might be able to shut it up WITHOUT having to whack it.

Bwana
04-19-2005, 11:00 PM
The poll speaks for itself, I'm just man enough to say it.

That's only because my hamster gun didn't make the poll. :)

stumppy
04-19-2005, 11:24 PM
That's only because my hamster gun didn't make the poll. :)

True!

I wonder if the hamster should be painted some real bright color before launch ? That way you'd be able to see him just like a tracer.

ENDelt260
04-19-2005, 11:27 PM
I look at the glass as half f*cked up.

Awesome.

stumppy
04-19-2005, 11:36 PM
When he's in school kill the furry rat. Then tell him the People for the Evil Treatment of Animals gang broke into the house and took it.

1. You get rid of your problem.
2. You get to blame it on someone else.
3. Your son will forever hate PETA.



Or you could put up a "savetoby.com" type web site. Make the save/kill date about a week away. And the amount $10,000.00.

1. You get rid of your problem.
2. You make a few bucks.

trndobrd
04-19-2005, 11:41 PM
Take him out to a nice Italian restaurant. Make sure you take his car, and park near the entrance. You'll need to park your vehicle on a side street earlier in the day. At dinner, try to get a table close to the entrance, but away from any front windows. Order the veal. Discuss the weather, the new construction on the overpass, his children. Excuse yourself to go 'freshen up'. In the restroom, take a slug of cheap gin. Walk out of the restroom, walk up behind him, the BAM! give him a slug right behind the ear. When he falls to the floor give him another in the chest and one in the face, just to make sure. Walk out quickly, but don't run. Go out, drop the gun near his car, walk to yours. Get in, drive away quickly, but not too fast. You may have to drop out of sight for a few months. Avoid Vegas and Miami, his crew can probably track you down in those places.

Bwana
04-19-2005, 11:45 PM
True!

I wonder if the hamster should be painted some real bright color before launch ? That way you'd be able to see him just like a tracer.

True that would work well, or for a night launch, she could break out a sparkler or two and a peice of duct tape and make a night out of it. Hell, buy a keg, grill some steaks, invite the neighbors, have side bets on distance.

ENDelt260
04-19-2005, 11:46 PM
I'm just man enough to say it.

Yes, it certainly takes quite the man to call a gal a twat over the 'net.

Rausch
04-19-2005, 11:49 PM
Hamsters are sitting targets for about 200 different sicknesses and infections we shrug off every day.

Odds are the poor guy will have one of 'em get "wet tail" or the "shakes" within 2 years. Mine did.

I think that's when responsibility meant something for my young self. Telling some 8th grade kid he's got to go out and kill 7 hamsters. Have to, they'll die either way.

I killed the babies, bought vitamins, and just friggen prayed momma-hamster would hold on.

Nope. She didn't. She did squeel and suffer and whatnot for 3 days though. And THEN I decided I had no way around it....

stumppy
04-19-2005, 11:57 PM
True that would work well, or for a night launch, she could break out a sparkler or two and a peice of duct tape and make a night out of it. Hell, buy a keg, grill some steaks, invite the neighbors, have side bets on distance.


Oh man, nothing but good times.:thumb:
A cookout and kegger party. B.Y.O.H.

Bwana
04-20-2005, 12:00 AM
B.Y.O.H.

ROFL

WilliamTheIrish
04-20-2005, 12:09 AM
Let it loose in the back yard wilderness [ 2 ] 8.00%
Fed-Ex it to Richard Gere signed "Love, the Dalai Lama" [ 6 ] 24.00%
Accidentally feed it some yummy rat poison snacks [ 2 ] 8.00%
You bought the damn thing, put up with it [ 13 ] * 52.00%
Ask Gaz. He knows everything. [ 2 ] 8.00%


The poll speaks for itself, I'm just man enough to say it.

Man enough to say what?

Thus far, you haven't said shiot.

Loki
04-20-2005, 12:27 AM
lol... fed-ex to richard gere...

ROFL

Redcoats58
04-20-2005, 12:42 AM
I'm pretty sure this would work. If it is a little boy you have, I bet he would much rather have this cool gun then that squeaky little rodent. Just show him how to load it up, and paint a target on the side of a brick wall, but make sure you put a little helmet on the hamster so PETA doesn't come after you. :thumb:


http://www.ourvictorianhouse.com/Nuker/nuker%20001%20a.jpg

Fairplay
04-20-2005, 12:50 AM
Sell the little critter to a homo and tell him its a gerbil.

Cntrygal
04-20-2005, 08:42 AM
If you can stand having a snake around.... I'd get your son a COOL snake and feed the SISSY rat to the MANLY snake. He could even take the snake to show and tell. :thumb:

badgirl
04-20-2005, 09:01 AM
I bought my kids a farret about 2 years ago for xmas, the pet store guaranteed no odor, its glands had been removed, hell I ended up paid almost 400 bucks for the farret,cage, and all the crap it needed, one week later, that bastard was gone. I gave it, cage, everything away, I could have sold it, but it had a odor and I thought it may take a little while to sell it, so I gave it to a co worker, who evidentally don't care how her house smells.

I just give the hampster to someone who wants it for thier child, my kids were upset that I gave their xmas gift away a week after xmas, don't worry they'll get over it, its not a memory your son will end up in therapy over, heck buy him a new video game to replace it and he'll forget all about the hampster.

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 09:02 AM
FERRET

HAMSTER

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION BADGIRL

Iowanian
04-20-2005, 09:03 AM
fill a garbage bag with acetylene and O2, put the hamster inside.......run a gas trail or fuse to it. Get back and light it.

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 09:04 AM
fill a garbage bag with acetylene and O2, put the hamster inside.......run a gas trail or fuse to it. Get back and light it.

Or you could just flush the little bastard down the toilet...get real people.

Hell, hit him with a frying pan and throw him in the trash.

badgirl
04-20-2005, 09:04 AM
FERRET

HAMSTER

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION BADGIRL
I know shes got a hampster and I had a ferret, moron, I am telling her what to do with her damn hampster and what I had to end up doing with my kids freaking rodent.

Whats your freaking point GoChiefs? :hmmm:

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 09:05 AM
I know shes got a hampster and I had a ferret, moron, I am telling her what to do with her damn hampster and what I had to end up doing with my kids freaking rodent.

Whats your freaking point GoChiefs? :hmmm:

HAMSTER
HAMSTER GOD DAMMIT
NOT "HAMPSTER"

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION BADGIRL

KcMizzou
04-20-2005, 09:05 AM
FERRET

HAMSTER

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION BADGIRLI put my dirty clothes in the hampster.

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 09:06 AM
I put my dirty clothes in the hampster.

HAMPER

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION KCMIZZOU

Iowanian
04-20-2005, 09:07 AM
gochiefs, everyone knows how you would dispose of Lemiwinks.

badgirl
04-20-2005, 09:07 AM
Or you could just flush the little bastard down the toilet...get real people.

Hell, hit him with a frying pan and throw him in the trash.
Why the hell should she flush it down the toilet if she could give it to someones kid who would really want it?

Did your mom flush you down the toilet when she saw you, I bet she wish she had now.

KcMizzou
04-20-2005, 09:07 AM
HAMPER

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION KCMIZZOU
ROFL

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 09:07 AM
Why the hell should she flush it down the toilet if she could give it to someones kid who would really want it?

Did your mom flush you down the toilet when she saw you, I bet she wish she had now.

PLEASE READ THE TITLE OF THE THREAD

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION BADGIRL

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 09:08 AM
gochiefs, everyone knows how you would dispose of Lemiwinks.

I HAVE ALREADY MADE THAT JOKE
I MUST NOW INFORM YOU THAT YOU HAVE BEEN "OWNED"

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION IOWANIAN

badgirl
04-20-2005, 09:09 AM
OK OK HAMSTER. jEEEEZE :rolleyes:

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 09:10 AM
OK OK HAMSTER. jEEEEZE :rolleyes:

WELL DONE
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR UNDERSTANDING

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION BADGIRL

badgirl
04-20-2005, 09:11 AM
PLEASE READ THE TITLE OF THE THREAD

THANKYOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION BADGIRL
I read the thread, seems she can't control the kid so she buys a hamster, now she can't control the hamster, cause she didn't know nothing about them before she bought it.


Time to get rid of the hamster, and get out the belt.

Dartgod
04-20-2005, 09:51 AM
Not a hippy, but assholes like you are the reason thousands of cats and dogs are killed every year. Some dumb twat goes out and buys one for their whiny brat and can't deal with the repercussions. I have had cats now for five years, there are many times I don't want to deal with clawed furniture, nasty litter boxes, or buying food...but I made the decision so I deal with it. You should try it.
Next time do a little research first.
The poll speaks for itself, I'm just man enough to say it.
You need to locate one of these.


Oh, and don't forget to bring a quarter...

Jenny Gump
04-20-2005, 10:29 AM
Not a hippy, but assholes like you are the reason thousands of cats and dogs are killed every year. Some dumb twat goes out and buys one for their whiny brat and can't deal with the repercussions. I have had cats now for five years, there are many times I don't want to deal with clawed furniture, nasty litter boxes, or buying food...but I made the decision so I deal with it. You should try it.
Next time do a little research first.

I consider being called an asshole a compliment, especially if it groups me amongst those that make up the majority of responses to the thread. It would definitely be a step up for you. Obviously, you are too busy taking care of your persian pussy to realize that this is a joke. I appreciate you biting though. You were exactly the type of egregious, full-of-himself-type of sh*t for brains I was hoping to extrapolate from the proverbial woodwork with the content of the thread.

JimNasium
04-20-2005, 10:32 AM
Not a hippy, but assholes like you are the reason thousands of cats and dogs are killed every year. Some dumb twat goes out and buys one for their whiny brat and can't deal with the repercussions. I have had cats now for five years, there are many times I don't want to deal with clawed furniture, nasty litter boxes, or buying food...but I made the decision so I deal with it. You should try it.
Next time do a little research first.
Jesus, lighten up Francis. Life can be fun if you'll just chill out and learn to ****ing laugh once in a while.

mcan
04-20-2005, 10:43 AM
The most humane way to kill a small animal (and it's quick) is to turn on your car, and hold the animal near the exaust pipe until it quits moving. The animal can't breathe much CO2 before it dies. But it's not like drowning. It's rather calm. Anway, there won't be any evidence and you can just put it right back in it's cage until you hear the kid crying (cruel I know).

mcan
04-20-2005, 10:47 AM
I haven't read the thread, but are there people seriously trying to defend the right to life of a freaking hamster?

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 10:51 AM
Its 4 days until the NFL Draft. I don't recall seeing any sign of you on ANY football thread. I'm guessing you're a popular Scat Target on the net.



Listen up killer....no one said I had to post on the draft threads to be a member of this board.

Why in the hell would I want to post on the draft threads about the same ole shit..CP sucks, the chiefs suck, wah wah wah.....I am not drafting the players nor do I have any say in it what so ever. Now when the draft is over and said and done I will let you know what I think.

It has been 8 months...when are you gonna learn that no man tells me what I can and cannot do.:harumph:

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 11:17 AM
Its 4 days until the NFL Draft. I don't recall seeing any sign of you on ANY football thread. I'm guessing you're a popular Scat Target on the net.



I have no say in who we draft....and I am tired of hearing about you all hating on the chiefs and this and that player. I do read every draft thread though..didn't know you missed me so much...I will start posting more for you.:thumb:


But when are you gonna learn that no man tells me what I can and canot do...:harumph:

If you were smart a few months ago you would of been praying for hockey instead of laughing about them not playing....I would be on my stars board instead of here.ROFL

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 11:50 AM
Not a hippy, but assholes like you are the reason thousands of cats and dogs are killed every year. Some dumb twat goes out and buys one for their whiny brat and can't deal with the repercussions. I have had cats now for five years, there are many times I don't want to deal with clawed furniture, nasty litter boxes, or buying food...but I made the decision so I deal with it. You should try it.
Next time do a little research first.



:thumb:

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 11:53 AM
Well I repeated a post...what the hell is wrong with this board today.

PastorMikH
04-20-2005, 11:55 AM
Once you are comfortable with the operation, try target shooting, distance records, and bazooka style shoulder launches. Our best shot is about 650 feet.[/list]



Guy on our fire dept back in SW Kansas got to experimenting with air pressure. He made a metal chamber with a tire valve stem to air it up with, and a ball valve for a trigger. He put together a gun that the potato was still going up (very quickly I might add) when it went out of site.


I have one that I used to shoot at the canadian geese on our pond with when we lived in Missouri. Did a good job of scaring them off so they'd quit crapping in the mowed areas.

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 11:59 AM
Yes, it certainly takes quite the man to call a gal a twat over the 'net.





Well if anybody knows......it's you.:harumph:

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 12:01 PM
Well I repeated a post...what the hell is wrong with this board today.

ID-10T errors.

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 12:01 PM
I read the thread, seems she can't control the kid so she buys a hamster, now she can't control the hamster, cause she didn't know nothing about them before she bought it.


Time to get rid of the hamster, and get out the belt.




For some.......I guess it's easier to kill then take responsibilty..:)

MOhillbilly
04-20-2005, 12:06 PM
i hope you all fall in a well.

Logical
04-20-2005, 12:06 PM
I consider being called an asshole a compliment, especially if it groups me amongst those that make up the majority of responses to the thread. It would definitely be a step up for you. Obviously, you are too busy taking care of your persian pussy to realize that this is a joke. I appreciate you biting though. You were exactly the type of egregious, full-of-himself-type of sh*t for brains I was hoping to extrapolate from the proverbial woodwork with the content of the thread.

God, I think I am in love.

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 12:07 PM
DO NOT **** WITH THE WARHAMSTER!

http://mujweb.cz/Sport/fbchamsters/warhamster.jpg

|Zach|
04-20-2005, 12:08 PM
i hope you all fall in a well.
A well full of hot chicks.

Count Zarth
04-20-2005, 12:08 PM
God, I think I am in love.

ROFL

Chief Faithful
04-20-2005, 12:27 PM
Just drop him in the hall of any local elementary school during the day and watch Elvis get adopted.

Or, you could let fan4ever put it on a hook and go cat fishing.

Bwana
04-20-2005, 12:45 PM
Guy on our fire dept back in SW Kansas got to experimenting with air pressure. He made a metal chamber with a tire valve stem to air it up with, and a ball valve for a trigger. He put together a gun that the potato was still going up (very quickly I might add) when it went out of site.


I have one that I used to shoot at the canadian geese on our pond with when we lived in Missouri. Did a good job of scaring them off so they'd quit crapping in the mowed areas.

Nothing like a good launching toy Mike. :thumb:

fan4ever
04-20-2005, 12:57 PM
I'm not sure of how to kill a hampster, but as of last week, I can tell you about a hundred ways to kill a cat.

Mark M
04-20-2005, 01:06 PM
Mmmm ... hamster smoothies.

http://www.ish.nl/TRI_NYE/concert3.html

Hehehehe ...

MM
~~;)

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 01:13 PM
I consider being called an asshole a compliment, especially if it groups me amongst those that make up the majority of responses to the thread. It would definitely be a step up for you. Obviously, you are too busy taking care of your persian pussy to realize that this is a joke. I appreciate you biting though. You were exactly the type of egregious, full-of-himself-type of sh*t for brains I was hoping to extrapolate from the proverbial woodwork with the content of the thread.
Man, there was a lot of big words in there. What's up with breaking out the polysyllabics? You know most folks here are barely literate as it is.

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 01:18 PM
Well if anybody knows......it's you.:harumph:
Figured you'd catch that.

While I've called you a twat countless times, I've never claimed the act made me "a man". An asshole? A dickhead? A coarse, uncouth, tactless bastard? Sure. But, it sure doesn't take any stones, or a spine, or an above average character to fling misogynistic insults via a keyboard.

Jenny Gump
04-20-2005, 01:20 PM
Man, there was a lot of big words in there. What's up with breaking out the polysyllabics? You know most folks here are barely literate as it is.

Yeah, I am waiting to see if Badgirl owns a dictionary.

Jenny Gump
04-20-2005, 01:23 PM
I read the thread, seems she can't control the kid so she buys a hamster, now she can't control the hamster, cause she didn't know nothing about them before she bought it.


Time to get rid of the hamster, and get out the belt.

Maybe you should read it again. I said I bought him the hamster because he had improved his behavior. I'm sure you set up similar reward systems with your grandkids?

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 01:24 PM
Yeah, I am waiting to see if Badgirl owns a dictionary.
Owns one? Probably. Knows how to operate it? Well...

badgirl
04-20-2005, 01:27 PM
Maybe you should read it again. I said I bought him the hamster because he had improved his behavior. I'm sure you set up similar reward systems with your grandkids?
I have 1 grandkid and hes 3 wks old so no it I haven't yet, but for my kids sure I have, and as for the dictionary, nope, don't have one, if I did I may check my spelling more often, but this isn't a job interview, so who cares. :rolleyes:

morphius
04-20-2005, 01:27 PM
I consider being called an asshole a compliment, especially if it groups me amongst those that make up the majority of responses to the thread. It would definitely be a step up for you. Obviously, you are too busy taking care of your persian pussy to realize that this is a joke. I appreciate you biting though. You were exactly the type of egregious, full-of-himself-type of sh*t for brains I was hoping to extrapolate from the proverbial woodwork with the content of the thread.
Damn, I guess that means my thought of putting some plastic wrap over the top of the cage and running a pipe into the cage from your exhaust pipe is worthless now...

Katipan
04-20-2005, 01:27 PM
Maybe you should read it again. I said I bought him the hamster because he had improved his behavior. I'm sure you set up similar reward systems with your grandkids?

I dunno if buying your hamster a video game to assuage your guilt over poor choices is really going to work. :(

Unless you have a really smart hamster.

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 01:50 PM
Assuage?

Who the hell taught these women to read? It sounds like a couple of them were even allowed to go to school. What's this country coming to?

Iowanian
04-20-2005, 01:58 PM
Endelt.........In case you haven't been following along: "no man is going to be telling Dp4me what to do"

Chiefs4me,I demand you to look both ways before crossing the street. Do NOT Hold your breath until I say When. Do NOT make toast while you're in the tub.

Jenny Gump
04-20-2005, 02:00 PM
I have 1 grandkid and hes 3 wks old so no it I haven't yet, but for my kids sure I have, and as for the dictionary, nope, don't have one, if I did I may check my spelling more often, but this isn't a job interview, so who cares. :rolleyes:

Hey, you were the one who said I couldn't control my kid. Sounds like I handled the situation fine since I obtained the outcome I had hoped for. I'm not killing the hamster, it was a joke. For God's sake, some of you people need to lighten up.

Iowanian
04-20-2005, 02:01 PM
"If you call yo grandma Mom, and you mama Pam....you goin to Jail!"

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 02:04 PM
Endelt.........In case you haven't been following along: "no man is going to be telling Dp4me what to do"

She's not one of the ones I think was allowed to go to school. It's Mer and Jenny usin' the ten cent words.

Jenny Gump
04-20-2005, 02:04 PM
I dunno if buying your hamster a video game to assuage your guilt over poor choices is really going to work. :(

Unless you have a really smart hamster.

Well, little Elvis does shake his leg around when he sings. I don't know if you would consider him a "smart hamster" or not.

OldTownChief
04-20-2005, 02:05 PM
I'm not killing the hamster, it was a joke.

Damn, this thread just went to shit. I was anxiously awaiting the outcome. I would have voted to bash it's head in with a hammer. Oh well!! The average lifespan of a hamster is only 3 years.

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 03:01 PM
Hey, you were the one who said I couldn't control my kid. Sounds like I handled the situation fine since I obtained the outcome I had hoped for. I'm not killing the hamster, it was a joke. For God's sake, some of you people need to lighten up.


You got the response you wanted ..try using smiley's next time. I guess badgirl and I parent different then you... but I don't make a joke of killing my sons pets. But hey that's just me.:)

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 03:05 PM
She's not one of the ones I think was allowed to go to school. It's Mer and Jenny usin' the ten cent words.


I try and use only small words here on the planet. You know, so as not to make everyone look up my words like FC does.:thumb:

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 03:08 PM
Figured you'd catch that.

While I've called you a twat countless times, I've never claimed the act made me "a man". An asshole? A dickhead? A coarse, uncouth, tactless bastard? Sure. But, it sure doesn't take any stones, or a spine, or an above average character to fling misogynistic insults via a keyboard.



oh baby..I knew you would have a good excuse...ROFLbut I had no idea I would need a shovel to read it.....:)

Jenson71
04-20-2005, 03:13 PM
Listen up killer....no one said I had to post on the draft threads to be a member of this board.

Why in the hell would I want to post on the draft threads about the same ole shit..CP sucks, the chiefs suck, wah wah wah.....I am not drafting the players nor do I have any say in it what so ever. Now when the draft is over and said and done I will let you know what I think.

It has been 8 months...when are you gonna learn that no man tells me what I can and cannot do.:harumph:

Ah, you're forgetting that the people who run this board are men. They can make you stop posting at any second they chose.

FloridaChief
04-20-2005, 03:16 PM
I try and use only small words here on the planet. You know, so as not to make everyone look up my words like FC does.

Do you mean moi?

Dartgod
04-20-2005, 03:29 PM
You got the response you wanted ..try using smiley's next time. I guess badgirl and I parent different then you... but I don't make a joke of killing my sons pets. But hey that's just me.:)
Wow. All but two people here got the joke immediately. Of those that didn't get it, I'm not at all surprised you are one of them.

I suggest you head out now looking for that Sense of Humor Vending Machine that I posted earlier. However, in your case, I recommend a whole roll of quarters rather than a single one. :rolleyes:

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 03:38 PM
oh baby..I knew you would have a good excuse...ROFLbut I had no idea I would need a shovel to read it.....:)
An excuse? WTF are you babbling about? I'm not making excuses for anything.

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 03:50 PM
Ah, you're forgetting that the people who run this board are men. They can make you stop posting at any second they chose.


oh how could I forget it......I am reminded daily.:harumph:

Let them do what they want..look at the big picture for a second.....do you really think it's gonna kill me to be kicked of a message board.:)

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 03:54 PM
Do you mean moi?



;)

Jenson71
04-20-2005, 03:57 PM
oh how could I forget it......I am reminded daily.:harumph:

Let them do what they want..look at the picture for a second.....do you really think it's gaonna kill me to be kicked of a message board.:)

Yeah. All you do here is get backed up into a corner and try to fight your way out. What fun is that? Yet you keep coming back. Is it for the avators? I don't get it.

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 04:06 PM
Yeah. All you do here is get backed up into a corner and try to fight your way out. What fun is that? Yet you keep coming back. Is it for the avators? I don't get it.


:rolleyes:.......who is backed into a corner? I am having a great time or I wouldn't be here...:) I have made some really great friends on here.You all don't know who I see and talk to from this board outside of here... just as I don't know who you see or talk to from this board in real life. :rolleyes:


Thanks for being so concerned for me....:)

You will be the first to know when I get unhappy...:thumb:

Jenson71
04-20-2005, 04:37 PM
:rolleyes:.......who is backed into a corner? I am having a great time or I wouldn't be here...:) I have made some really great friends on here.You all don't know who I see and talk to from this board outside of here... just as I don't know who you see or talk to from this board in real life. :rolleyes:


Has anyone here really had a decent conversation with you? You always seem to be bitching about something to someone else. You spend a lot of time here, doesn't mean you like it. You accept the treatment (and love) from others that you think you deserve. That doesn't seem to be too high. And you also critize others for their parenting, yet you're on here all the time and average a near 17 posts per day. A person who spends so much time from their "real life" obviously can't be too overjoyed. And the rest of your paragraph makes little to no sense.

badgirl
04-20-2005, 05:06 PM
I didn't mean to sound like I was complaining about how Jenny raises her kid, I misread it and thought she bought the hamster to try to get him to behave better, that was my fault, I'm by far a perfect parent, but thank God my kids made it to become adults and made it out of the house safely, because I did raise them by myself for the past 10 years and I'm proud of them. :thumb: Sorry if I offended you Jenny, I misread your thread :(

Jenny Gump
04-20-2005, 05:55 PM
I didn't mean to sound like I was complaining about how Jenny raises her kid, I misread it and thought she bought the hamster to try to get him to behave better, that was my fault, I'm by far a perfect parent, but thank God my kids made it to become adults and made it out of the house safely, because I did raise them by myself for the past 10 years and I'm proud of them. :thumb: Sorry if I offended you Jenny, I misread your thread :(

It's okay. Sorry for snapping at you. I can be pretty hateful...and apparently I'm a twat too...but I guess you already knew that.

Logical
04-20-2005, 05:56 PM
Ah, you're forgetting that the people who run this board are men. They can make you stop posting at any second they chose.Actually one of them is a woman Jazzzlovr, and a very fine adminstrator at that.

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 05:57 PM
It's okay. Sorry for snapping at you. I can be pretty hateful...and apparently I'm a twat too...but I guess you already knew that.
You may be a twat, but you're OUR twat, gawddammit.

Jenny Gump
04-20-2005, 06:00 PM
You got the response you wanted ..try using smiley's next time. I guess badgirl and I parent different then you... but I don't make a joke of killing my sons pets. But hey that's just me.:)

Honestly, I find the constant use of smiley's to be somewhat passive aggressive. I prefer to let my posts do the talking. But then...that's just me. :thumb:

Jenny Gump
04-20-2005, 06:01 PM
You may be a twat, but you're OUR twat, gawddammit.

Ahhhh, shucks. I bet you say that to all the twats.

badgirl
04-20-2005, 06:02 PM
It's okay. Sorry for snapping at you. I can be pretty hateful...and apparently I'm a twat too...but I guess you already knew that.
Actually I didn't realize that, but if Endelt said it, well.......I know its a damn lie!!! :)

Jenson71
04-20-2005, 06:05 PM
Actually one of them is a woman Jazzzlovr, and a very fine adminstrator at that.

That's very true. And I like Jazzzlover as much as the rest. But, I really doubt she'd put up much of a fight if chiefs4me got the axe.

Coach
04-20-2005, 06:05 PM
Why not just give it to another kid or to the vet. I'm sure they'll do the rest. :shrug:

Skip Towne
04-20-2005, 06:11 PM
It's okay. Sorry for snapping at you. I can be pretty hateful...and apparently I'm a twat too...but I guess you already knew that.
You ARE a hateful twat. I like it!

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 06:17 PM
Has anyone here really had a decent conversation with you? You always seem to be bitching about something to someone else. You spend a lot of time here, doesn't mean you like it. You accept the treatment (and love) from others that you think you deserve. That doesn't seem to be too high. And you also critize others for their parenting, yet you're on here all the time and average a near 17 posts per day. A person who spends so much time from their "real life" obviously can't be too overjoyed. And the rest of your paragraph makes little to no sense.




Honey when you start paying my bills then I might care what you think.

Who gives a flying **** how many post I make a day. What do you do..sit around all day and count how many times everyone makes a post?:rolleyes:

I had a little more to say to you.....but really...who are you that I care to enlighten further.:harumph:


Now don't you have some homework to go do....ROFL

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 06:20 PM
Honestly, I find the constant use of smiley's to be somewhat passive aggressive. I prefer to let my posts do the talking. But then...that's just me. :thumb:




I will remember that from now on, when reading your posts. ;)

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 06:20 PM
Ahhhh, shucks. I bet you say that to all the twats.
Only the sweetes smelling ones, sugar snatch.

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 06:21 PM
That's very true. And I like Jazzzlover as much as the rest. But, I really doubt she'd put up much of a fight if chiefs4me got the axe.
She's likely to be the one wielding the axe.

Coach
04-20-2005, 06:24 PM
But, I really doubt she'd put up much of a fight if chiefs4me got the axe.

Or a chainsaw. (Texas Chainsaw Massacre)

Jenson71
04-20-2005, 06:34 PM
Now don't you have some homework to go do....ROFL

Implying that I'm a good student, a responsible and educated person? Ouch.

I try to do all my homework. Sometimes, I slack off on the math though. I have to watch that.

There are two easy ways of finding out a person's posts per day. One involves dividing and all that hard stuff so I'll spare you those details. The other is looking it up in a profile.

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 06:50 PM
Implying that I'm a good student, a responsible and educated person? Ouch.

I try to do all my homework. Sometimes, I slack off on the math though. I have to watch that.

There are two easy ways of finding out a person's posts per day. One involves dividing and all that hard stuff so I'll spare you those details. The other is looking it up in a profile.



Is the math hard for you? I have a senior or freshman that could help you out.;)


only 17 posts a day.....surely I have more then that to say.:)


Now go clean your room.......:D

keg in kc
04-20-2005, 06:52 PM
I'm too lazy to read this entire f*cking thread, so I'll just assume that someone else has already pulled out the freezer and rubber tubing option.

Logical
04-20-2005, 06:55 PM
Honey when you start paying my bills then I might care what you think.

.....ROFL Why do I have sincere doubts that this statement contains even a shred of truth?

badgirl
04-20-2005, 06:56 PM
IF I was really going to do away with a hamster, I'd do the old cat disappearing act and take it for a ride too, or feed the hamster to the cat and take the cat for a ride. :p

Jenson71
04-20-2005, 06:59 PM
Now go clean your room.......:D

Go clean the kitchen, dumb bitch.

keg in kc
04-20-2005, 06:59 PM
Why do I have sincere doubts that this statement contains even a shred of truth?People who really don't care don't generally feel any need to tell you over and over that they don't care.

Darkwolfe
04-20-2005, 07:02 PM
Put some Nacho cheese down on the ground by the railing.

That's just cold. :shake:

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 07:21 PM
Why do I have sincere doubts that this statement contains even a shred of truth?



I just showed that comment to my other half before he heads out the door. He said 2 things.......thats the damn truth and give that man a beer.ROFL

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 07:23 PM
Go clean the kitchen, dumb bitch.




ROFL.....it's already clean...next question.:rolleyes:

chiefs4me
04-20-2005, 07:24 PM
People who really don't care don't generally feel any need to tell you over and over that they don't care.





oooooooh coming from you....that hurts.:rolleyes:

Jenson71
04-20-2005, 07:27 PM
ROFL.....it's already clean...next question.:rolleyes:

It's clean when I say it's clean. There was no previous question. You're math skills are lacking. So is your English.

angel
04-20-2005, 07:28 PM
I'm too lazy to read this entire f*cking thread, so I'll just assume that someone else has already pulled out the freezer and rubber tubing option.
I, too am too lazy

Buy your son a pet snake. Less mess, takes care of the hamster. Two birds, one stone... so to speak

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 07:40 PM
I, too am too lazy

Buy your son a pet snake. Less mess, takes care of the hamster. Two birds, one stone... so to speak
You're not the first to suggest the snake solution... but, I think I should point out an obvious problem with that plan. Then she's gonna have to buy an even bigger pet to eat the snake. This shit never ends. Didn't you ever sing that song about the woman who swallowed the fly? Is that the fate you wish upon our favorite twat Jenny?

mcan
04-20-2005, 07:43 PM
You're not the first to suggest the snake solution... but, I think I should point out an obvious problem with that plan. Then she's gonna have to buy an even bigger pet to eat the snake. This shit never ends. Didn't you ever sing that song about the woman who swallowed the fly? Is that the fate you wish upon our favorite twat Jenny?


That reminds me of a Simpsons episode...

Skip Towne
04-20-2005, 07:45 PM
You're not the first to suggest the snake solution... but, I think I should point out an obvious problem with that plan. Then she's gonna have to buy an even bigger pet to eat the snake. This shit never ends. Didn't you ever sing that song about the woman who swallowed the fly? Is that the fate you wish upon our favorite twat Jenny?
Man, you're REALLY pressing your luck.

angel
04-20-2005, 07:45 PM
You're not the first to suggest the snake solution... but, I think I should point out an obvious problem with that plan. Then she's gonna have to buy an even bigger pet to eat the snake. This shit never ends. Didn't you ever sing that song about the woman who swallowed the fly? Is that the fate you wish upon our favorite twat Jenny?
Why did the woman swallow a fly? That's just gross.

Why would Jenny need to buy something to eat the snake? Snakes aren't smelly. This would solve her problem.

Katipan
04-20-2005, 07:48 PM
what :p the ROFL hell :) kind :rolleyes: of :clap: sick :thumb: ass :p creatures :harumph: eat :hmmm: snakes? :thumb:

Logical
04-20-2005, 07:50 PM
what :p the ROFL hell :) kind :rolleyes: of :clap: sick :thumb: ass :p creatures :harumph: eat :hmmm: snakes?

Roadrunners for one.:shrug:

Iowanian
04-20-2005, 08:03 PM
Eagles, Hawks, Mongoose, fish

Katipan
04-20-2005, 08:06 PM
Really i just wanted to use a bunch of smilies.

Although now I'm sad that out of all those animals, I've only seen a hawk and a fish.

And the hawk I saw at the zoo.

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 08:40 PM
Why did the woman swallow a fly? That's just gross.

I dunno. Perhaps she'll die.

Brando
04-20-2005, 08:44 PM
....let this thread die!

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 08:48 PM
I'm responding to this thread again solely to annoy Brando.

Patrick
04-20-2005, 09:06 PM
I'm responding to this thread again solely to annoy Brando.

x2


Stooges

sparkky
04-20-2005, 09:13 PM
Try renaming it "Super Bowl Hopes" and then send it to King Carl.

Brando
04-20-2005, 09:16 PM
I'm responding to this thread again solely to annoy Brando.
May you die of ghonnerea and rot in hell.

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 09:21 PM
May you die of ghonnerea and rot in hell.
Pretty sure I'm gonna rot in hell. And, there's a decent possibility I'll pick up the clap at some point. I don't think I'll die from it, though.

Brando
04-20-2005, 09:22 PM
Pretty sure I'm gonna rot in hell. And, there's a decent possibility I'll pick up the clap at some point. I don't think I'll die from it, though.
Hey man..stranger things have happened. Somehow you manage to get laid :thumb:

Simplex3
04-20-2005, 09:24 PM
Hey man..stranger things have happened. Somehow you manage to get laid :thumb:
That's an accurate statement if "somehow"="beer".

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 09:25 PM
Somehow you manage to get laid :thumb:

A vicodin, couple percocet, couple beers, and the panties just drop.

Skip Towne
04-20-2005, 09:31 PM
A vicodin, couple percocet, couple beers, and the panties just drop.
Aha, I knew it. You have to drug them to get them to screw you. You're really GoChiefs aren't you?

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 09:32 PM
Aha, I knew it. You have to drug them to get them to screw you. You're really GoChiefs aren't you?
No. Gochiefs would never take the initiative to drug a woman. That would require him to get within 100 yards of a live one.

Brando
04-20-2005, 09:37 PM
No. Gochiefs would never take the initiative to drug a woman. That would require him to get within 100 yards of a live one.
He sleeps within the clutches of his mama's panties every night.

Patrick
04-20-2005, 09:38 PM
It would also require him to loose his place in line for Episode III - The Return of the Chodes

Brian is more of a "rope and trunkspace" kind of guy, or at least that was my impression of him. Even moreso when I saw his brown van with "free candy" spray-painted on the side of it parked outside.

Katipan
04-20-2005, 09:41 PM
A vicodin, couple percocet, couple beers, and the panties just drop.

I think it's hot that you wear panties

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 09:55 PM
I think it's hot that you wear panties
Only on Wednesdays.

COchief
04-20-2005, 09:58 PM
I consider being called an asshole a compliment, especially if it groups me amongst those that make up the majority of responses to the thread.

I am saddened that you interpret being called an asshole a compliment, I sincerely feel for you if an asshole is a step up from where you currently reside in society's pecking order.
***BREAKING NEWS*** The majority of the respondents to your poll think you are an asshole!
"You bought the damn thing, put up with it [ 33 ] * 52.38% "

It would definitely be a step up for you. Obviously, you are too busy taking care of your persian pussy to realize that this is a joke.

The poll answers may be a joke, but it appears that you did in fact purchase a pet for your whiny little brat without doing any research what so ever. "Hi Jenny, I am the internet, I have vast resources of information available on any subject matter, and the amazing thing is...you are apparently oblivious to this, yet you are on me right now dumbshit!"

I appreciate you biting though. You were exactly the type of egregious, full-of-himself-type of sh*t for brains I was hoping to extrapolate from the proverbial woodwork with the content of the thread.

Interesting, I never thought multitudes of compliments from pasty internet nerds could have a real life effect on someone's self esteem. Amazingly, you appear to have the idea in your pretty little head that you possess intelligence. I do appreciate the fact you took twelve hours to look up and formulate those large words into a rambling run on sentence. I must laugh at your ridiculous mention of "content of the thread", the most worthwhile part certainly being your statement "I am an idiot".
As for the "shit for brains", if that is what you girls in the truck stops along I-70 refer to business analysts, who own their own businesses without holding a college degree in their twenties as, that is perfectly fine by me.

Oh and honey don't fret about the brutally honest punishment you have just endured, I am sure some high quality men will be PMing you shortly to reassure you of your astounding intellect.

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 10:00 PM
COchief strikes me as the sort of fellow who likes to stick his cock in hornets' nests.

|Zach|
04-20-2005, 10:03 PM
COchief strikes me as the sort of fellow who likes to stick his cock in hornets' nests.
ROFL

COchief
04-20-2005, 10:18 PM
COchief strikes me as the sort of fellow who likes to stick his cock in hornets' nests.

If someone is going to fling personal insults about, they should be prepared to deal the backlash.

Besides, I highly doubt the "sting" will come anywhere close to the severity of a hornet's nest.

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 10:24 PM
If someone is going to fling personal insults about, they should be prepared to deal the backlash.

You fired the opening volley.

Phobia
04-20-2005, 10:27 PM
If someone is going to fling personal insults about, they should be prepared to deal the backlash.

I agree. I got your back until Jenny reads this.

COchief
04-20-2005, 10:28 PM
^ True, I did speak the truth. I am not a peta freak by any means, but it only takes a half hour at the most to find out what you are in for with any pet.

Iowanian
04-20-2005, 10:30 PM
I think in response to COchief's rudeness.......you should pull a wing off of the rodent every week and mail it to his house.

COchief
04-20-2005, 10:34 PM
I really don't give a shit about any rodent. I feel this exact scenario is why so many cats & dogs are put to death every year. Some idiot takes their kid to a pet store, kid starts crying and the parent gives in and buys the cute little puppy/kitten. Then about a month or two later, after many carpet shittings, it's off to the humane society (death row).

And Iowanian, rudeness? I thought you were known as the most ruthless gunslinger on the planet. Is the Mrs. makin ya soft? JK, Jenny and the nerd battalion I can handle, but I don't think I want to mess with the master.

Phobia
04-20-2005, 10:38 PM
JK, Jenny and the nerd battalion I can handle, but I don't think I want to mess with the master.

Nerd battalion? Did you just say that outloud? Were you talking to metrolike and gochiefs? I'm pretty sure you must have been.

go bowe
04-20-2005, 10:39 PM
Honestly, I find the constant use of smiley's to be somewhat passive aggressive. I prefer to let my posts do the talking. But then...that's just me. :thumb:somewhat?

:banghead: :cuss: :rolleyes: :grr: :eek:

COchief
04-20-2005, 10:44 PM
Phobia, look at when I joined, you think I don't know about "them"?

Iowanian
04-20-2005, 10:49 PM
someone needs to resize their damn sig.

CO...I was just Effin with you....not trying to bruise your neck meat

ENDelt260
04-20-2005, 10:53 PM
JK, Jenny and the nerd battalion

Who?

COchief
04-20-2005, 10:55 PM
I think it was gobo that fugged up the thread.

Iowanian, the phrase "neck meat" makes me shiver for some reason.

Cntrygal
04-21-2005, 08:32 AM
You're not the first to suggest the snake solution... but, I think I should point out an obvious problem with that plan. Then she's gonna have to buy an even bigger pet to eat the snake. This shit never ends. Didn't you ever sing that song about the woman who swallowed the fly? Is that the fate you wish upon our favorite twat Jenny?


They could donate the snake to the zoo (and have her kid's name on the plaque) or let it live under the house.

chiefs4me
04-21-2005, 11:51 AM
I am saddened that you interpret being called an asshole a compliment, I sincerely feel for you if an asshole is a step up from where you currently reside in society's pecking order.
***BREAKING NEWS*** The majority of the respondents to your poll think you are an asshole!
"You bought the damn thing, put up with it [ 33 ] * 52.38% "



The poll answers may be a joke, but it appears that you did in fact purchase a pet for your whiny little brat without doing any research what so ever. "Hi Jenny, I am the internet, I have vast resources of information available on any subject matter, and the amazing thing is...you are apparently oblivious to this, yet you are on me right now dumbshit!"



Interesting, I never thought multitudes of compliments from pasty internet nerds could have a real life effect on someone's self esteem. Amazingly, you appear to have the idea in your pretty little head that you possess intelligence. I do appreciate the fact you took twelve hours to look up and formulate those large words into a rambling run on sentence. I must laugh at your ridiculous mention of "content of the thread", the most worthwhile part certainly being your statement "I am an idiot".
As for the "shit for brains", if that is what you girls in the truck stops along I-70 refer to business analysts, who own their own businesses without holding a college degree in their twenties as, that is perfectly fine by me.

Oh and honey don't fret about the brutally honest punishment you have just endured, I am sure some high quality men will be PMing you shortly to reassure you of your astounding intellect.


Wow......just wow.....has jenny seen this yet.

And who are you really COchief?

chiefs4me
04-21-2005, 11:52 AM
I really don't give a shit about any rodent. I feel this exact scenario is why so many cats & dogs are put to death every year. Some idiot takes their kid to a pet store, kid starts crying and the parent gives in and buys the cute little puppy/kitten. Then about a month or two later, after many carpet shittings, it's off to the humane society (death row).

And Iowanian, rudeness? I thought you were known as the most ruthless gunslinger on the planet. Is the Mrs. makin ya soft? JK, Jenny and the nerd battalion I can handle, but I don't think I want to mess with the master.



And Killer just took this.....no reply......:hmmm:

ExtremeChief
04-21-2005, 12:01 PM
Try renaming it "Super Bowl Hopes" and then send it to King Carl.



ROFL

Scaga
04-21-2005, 12:05 PM
Wait for the first REALLY hot day and put it's cage in direct sunlight. Only took one day. That's how my nephew's hamster bit it.

Or you could just hang it.

Jenny Gump
04-21-2005, 02:00 PM
***BREAKING NEWS*** The majority of the respondents to your poll think you are an asshole!


Why would I put that response in the poll if I didn't recognize my mistake. You and C4Me were the only ones to call me an asshole....asshole.

The poll answers may be a joke, but it appears that you did in fact purchase a pet for your whiny little brat without doing any research what so ever.

The whole thing was a joke spunk-breath. What's funny is that you blame me for all the cats and dogs who are put to death.

As far as insults, you were the one who called the respondents assholes, me a dumb twat, and my kid a whiny brat. You made a character assumption about my son, and that isn't cool. I just responded in kind as any mother would have. You didn't even read the f*cking opening post. I was rewarding him for improved behavior. He isn't a whiny brat. He had overcome something that was very difficult for him. I never said he had been a brat. The reward was my idea, not his.

Interesting, I never thought multitudes of compliments from pasty internet nerds could have a real life effect on someone's self esteem. Amazingly, you appear to have the idea in your pretty little head that you possess intelligence.

You are right, I have great self-esteem, but for all the right reasons. I am a successful, fit, and well-adjusted woman who is extremely intelligent. Hard to get a Master's Degree without that. I'm not trying to say that someone without a college education, such as yourself isn't intelligent, but I didn't get into this position level by lacking smarts. I've worked very hard to accomplish so much in so little time.

I must laugh at your ridiculous mention of "content of the thread", the most worthwhile part certainly being your statement "I am an idiot".

Many of my posts are indicative of my willingness to make fun of myself. You ought to try it sometime. Lighten up Francis.

As for the "shit for brains", if that is what you girls in the truck stops along I-70 refer to business analysts, who own their own businesses without holding a college degree in their twenties as, that is perfectly fine by me.

I take offense to that. I don't live anywhere near I-70.

I don't feel punished by your post, in fact, it was weak at best. I give you an E for effort though. My house has actually been the site of many dog and cat "dropoffs" because I live in the country and people know we will take care of the poor creature. His hamster's not dead, his rabbit's not dead, and his cat isn't dead......yet. Thanks for playing.

Jenny Gump
04-21-2005, 02:09 PM
You know...the little feller is kinda growing on me. He is very cute.

JimNasium
04-21-2005, 02:53 PM
You know...the little feller is kinda growing on me. He is very cute.
What a cute little bastard. Richard Gere will be contacting you soon.

chiefs4me
04-21-2005, 02:56 PM
Why would I put that response in the poll if I didn't recognize my mistake. You and C4Me were the only ones to call me an asshole....asshole.



The whole thing was a joke spunk-breath. What's funny is that you blame me for all the cats and dogs who are put to death.

As far as insults, you were the one who called the respondents assholes, me a dumb twat, and my kid a whiny brat. You made a character assumption about my son, and that isn't cool. I just responded in kind as any mother would have. You didn't even read the f*cking opening post. I was rewarding him for improved behavior. He isn't a whiny brat. He had overcome something that was very difficult for him. I never said he had been a brat. The reward was my idea, not his.



You are right, I have great self-esteem, but for all the right reasons. I am a successful, fit, and well-adjusted woman who is extremely intelligent. Hard to get a Master's Degree without that. I'm not trying to say that someone without a college education, such as yourself isn't intelligent, but I didn't get into this position level by lacking smarts. I've worked very hard to accomplish so much in so little time.



Many of my posts are indicative of my willingness to make fun of myself. You ought to try it sometime. Lighten up Francis.



I take offense to that. I don't live anywhere near I-70.

I don't feel punished by your post, in fact, it was weak at best. I give you an E for effort though. My house has actually been the site of many dog and cat "dropoffs" because I live in the country and people know we will take care of the poor creature. His hamster's not dead, his rabbit's not dead, and his cat isn't dead......yet. Thanks for playing.






Not trying to stir the pot..but you need to show me where I called you an asshole...:hmmm: I might not of agreed with the thread...but I don't seem to find my post where I called you an asshole...

Jenny Gump
04-21-2005, 03:01 PM
Not trying to stir the pot..but you need to show me where I called you an asshole...:hmmm: I might not of agreed with the thread...but I don't seem to find my post where I called you an asshole...

http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showpost.php?p=2415097&postcount=119

Your smiley implies agreement.

Rain Man
04-21-2005, 03:12 PM
My prediction is that unless Jennygump takes the hamster by surprise, the hamster will eventually prevail.

ENDelt260
04-21-2005, 03:22 PM
his cat isn't dead

How nice. Only nine years old and he's already got himself a little pussy.

Digital Takawira
04-21-2005, 03:24 PM
Damn........... I hate tree hugging hippies and find the PETA annoying.......

But you guys are just sick.

yeah, they're all pretty much going to hell.

then again, so am i but for entirely different reasons.

Calcountry
04-21-2005, 03:29 PM
In a moment of weakness I let my son buy a hamster as a reward for improved behavior. WTF was I thinking? Apparently, hamsters never sleep, or for not longer than 17 seconds at a pop. They poop a lot too. Noisy mutha focker. I'm ready to plan it's demise and we've had it for one day. His name is Elvis. That's the only cool thing about him/her, whatever it is.

Help me. I'm an idiot.

Poll forthcoming.Just give him to Uncle Bunny's feed store. He would make a great scoobie snack for a Snake. :D

Calcountry
04-21-2005, 03:30 PM
Just take it back to the pet store and give it back to them for free....No sense in killing it and depriving Richard Gere of a potential sex toy.ding ding, of course, I would sell it again. lmao

Calcountry
04-21-2005, 03:32 PM
Yeah, true enough. I am just in the planning stages of the whack, but I tell you, that hamster's going down.I could have told ya the little fuggers sleep in the day and play all night. All you ever have to do is PM me your pet questions. ;)

Calcountry
04-21-2005, 03:34 PM
Feed it to a snake, he will love it.$4.99 is the going rate, so, if she brought it to me, it would be the same as handing me a 5 dollar bill.

Calcountry
04-21-2005, 03:35 PM
As I understand, hamsters that get out are attracted to the food which can catch in the bottom of disposal units in your sink. If one of them crawled down there, you'd really have no way of knowing about that in advance....

For that matter, I'd imagine it would be easy for one to confuse a hamster swimming in the toilet for a turd that hasn't quite settled from its maiden voyage.... If one were to mistake that hamster for a turd and the hamster got flushed, one would hope that the hamster could hold his breath for a sufficient amount of time as they've been known to do.

Of course, that's a shitty thing to do....Believe me when I tell you this, they CANNOT withstand the force of the swirling water.

Calcountry
04-21-2005, 03:38 PM
Damn........... I hate tree hugging hippies and find the PETA annoying.......

But you guys are just sick.This from a freak of nature. :rolleyes:

Calcountry
04-21-2005, 03:45 PM
I read the thread, seems she can't control the kid so she buys a hamster, now she can't control the hamster, cause she didn't know nothing about them before she bought it.


Time to get rid of the hamster, and get out the belt.Next time, come to Uncle bunny.

Calcountry
04-21-2005, 03:48 PM
I have no say in who we draft....and I am tired of hearing about you all hating on the chiefs and this and that player. I do read every draft thread though..didn't know you missed me so much...I will start posting more for you.:thumb:


But when are you gonna learn that no man tells me what I can and canot do...:harumph:

If you were smart a few months ago you would of been praying for hockey instead of laughing about them not playing....I would be on my stars board instead of here.ROFLImagine theres no Hockey, You can if you try,

No crease, no Goalie, ....

Jenny Gump
04-21-2005, 03:50 PM
How nice. Only nine years old and he's already got himself a little pussy.

Even more impressive....he's six.

chiefs4me
04-21-2005, 03:51 PM
http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showpost.php?p=2415097&postcount=119

Your smiley implies agreement.


:rolleyes: