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View Full Version : If it's a beard, it's a d@mn good one.


Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 02:24 PM
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/7659808/

42 year old Cruise steals Katie Holmes from Chris Klein.

KCChiefsMan
04-29-2005, 02:27 PM
poor guy....kidman, cruz, holmes.....I'm sure there are many more I can't think of

jcroft
04-29-2005, 02:28 PM
Rosie O'Donnel.

jcroft
04-29-2005, 02:30 PM
Seriously, I think he was also married to Mimi Rogers, wasn't he?

beavis
04-29-2005, 02:30 PM
What a bastard.

HolmeZz
04-29-2005, 02:30 PM
CCA! CCA! CUTE COUPLE ALERT!

Nzoner
04-29-2005, 02:33 PM
Seriously, I think he was also married to Mimi Rogers, wasn't he?

According to the article,yes ;)

Ari Chi3fs
04-29-2005, 02:34 PM
my wife hooked up with a chick who looked like Katie Holmes before we were married. I have video footage. :)

Donger
04-29-2005, 02:36 PM
And gerbils everywhere have a collective sigh of relief.

Scaga
04-29-2005, 02:41 PM
my wife hooked up with a chick who looked like Katie Holmes before we were married. I have video footage. :)


Link???? :drool:

ROFL

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 02:42 PM
Seriously, I think he was also married to Mimi Rogers, wasn't he?
Mrs. Kensington. Rowr.

Demonpenz
04-29-2005, 02:42 PM
He had her at hello

chiefs4me
04-29-2005, 03:22 PM
Lucky wench....

Rain Man
04-29-2005, 04:00 PM
poor guy....kidman, cruz, holmes.....I'm sure there are many more I can't think of

And he's rich.

Life is truly unfair.

ENDelt260
04-29-2005, 04:13 PM
Am I the only one who has no idea what the thread title means?

Donger
04-29-2005, 04:15 PM
Am I the only one who has no idea what the thread title means?

Cool. I was going to raise my hand, but was waiting for some other dufus to do so first.

ENDelt260
04-29-2005, 04:18 PM
Cool. I was going to raise my hand, but was waiting for some other dufus to do so first.
That was my original plan, but I got tired of waiting. So, I volunteer to be the doofus this time.

RaiderH8r
04-29-2005, 04:19 PM
And gerbils everywhere have a collective sigh of relief.
Not as long as Richard Gere is on the hunt.
http://www.csps.minx.co.uk/epiimgs/409/sp409_butters.jpg

Lemmiwinks...NOOOOO!!!

CosmicPal
04-29-2005, 04:19 PM
Beard or no beard, that's one lucky SOB

Spicy McHaggis
04-29-2005, 04:24 PM
The reason for the Klein/Holmes breakup. Katie finally watched...

http://www.audiorevolution.com/gifs/dvdreviews/rollerball.gif

Seriously this movie is so bad that not even being completely ferschinckered makes it bearable.

htismaqe
04-29-2005, 04:47 PM
That was my original plan, but I got tired of waiting. So, I volunteer to be the doofus this time.

You guys seriously don't know what a "beard" is?

It's when a gay guy dates/marries a hot chick so as to look "not gay".

Kinda like when a weenie grows a beard to look like super tough guy.

Donger
04-29-2005, 04:49 PM
You guys seriously don't know what a "beard" is?

It's when a gay guy dates/marries a hot chick so as to look "not gay".

Kinda like when a weenie grows a beard to look like super tough guy.

Heh. No, I had no idea. I guess I'm not up-to-date on my homosexual nomenclature.

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 04:49 PM
Am I the only one who has no idea what the thread title means?
It's a long standing rumor that Tom LOOOOVES the cock. And all his arm candy is just a front for his public hunky image. The term 'beard' is a colloquialism for a woman who agrees to give the public impression that she is romantically involved with a closeted hwoah-moe.

ENDelt260
04-29-2005, 04:51 PM
Heh. No, I had no idea. I guess I'm not up-to-date on my homosexual nomenclature.
I'm with Donger on this one. I learned something new today.

dirk digler
04-29-2005, 04:52 PM
You guys seriously don't know what a "beard" is?

It's when a gay guy dates/marries a hot chick so as to look "not gay".

Kinda like when a weenie grows a beard to look like super tough guy.

I had no idea either. Thanks Parker.

For the record I just can't fathom Tom Cruise to be gay.

Mr. Laz
04-29-2005, 05:20 PM
It's a long standing rumor that Tom LOOOOVES the cock. And all his arm candy is just a front for his public hunky image. The term 'beard' is a colloquialism for a woman who agrees to give the public impression that she is romantically involved with a closeted hwoah-moe.
ya... i'm sure the 2 kids he had with nicole kidman were just for appearances.


maybe he borrowed someone else's cock to get the job done.

ENDelt260
04-29-2005, 05:23 PM
maybe he borrowed someone else's cock to get the job done.

Well, yeah, actually. They were adopted.

CosmicPal
04-29-2005, 05:23 PM
It's a long standing rumor that Tom LOOOOVES the cock. And all his arm candy is just a front for his public hunky image. The term 'beard' is a colloquialism for a woman who agrees to give the public impression that she is romantically involved with a closeted hwoah-moe.

Whoa....I didn't know this either.

I can see that, but what I don't get is how she would be planning on marrying someone, a straight guy even, and then breaking up with said fiance' only to be courting herself with a guy who is presumeably bi-sexual. That doesn't make sense. And don't tell me Tommy boy gave her a fat check for half a millon to court him- she can get the same dough from any of the other actors.

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 05:24 PM
ya... i'm sure the 2 kids he had with nicole kidman were just for appearances.


maybe he borrowed someone else's cock to get the job done.
I didn't say it was true. I said it was a long standing rumor. That fact stands irrespective of my endorsement or lack thereof, or the truth of the matter.
To that end, though. I worked with an attorney who swore that, when he was a desk man for an LA hotel, Cruise would sign in for the night with a parade of swishy dudes. I repeatedly told him I thought he was FOS, but he never wavered from his allegations.
I could care less either way.

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 05:25 PM
Whoa....I didn't know this either.

I can see that, but what I don't get is how she would be planning on marrying someone, a straight guy even, and then breaking up with said fiance' only to be courting herself with a guy who is presumeably bi-sexual. That doesn't make sense. And don't tell me Tommy boy gave her a fat check for half a millon to court him- she can get the same dough from any of the other actors.
That's precisely why I titled the thread "If it's a beard, it's a d@mn good one."
If anything, this is the development that settles it for once and for all that the rumors have been FOS, or at least the byproduct of some experimental phase earlier in his life.
I mean, how long have Bowie and Iman been married now? And he's had the most famous lips in rock and roll around his hangdown. ROFL ROFL

Logical
04-29-2005, 05:30 PM
The things you learn on the Planet.

Fool that I was I opened the picture and was wondering what the hell that title was all about.

Thanks for the education Parker and Baby Lee

Skip Towne
04-29-2005, 05:34 PM
The things you learn on the Planet.

Fool that I was I opened the picture and was wondering what the hell that title was all about.

Thanks for the education Parker and Baby Lee
I can't help but wonder how they came by this info. NTTAWWT

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 05:36 PM
I can't help but wonder how they came by this info. NTTAWWT
Umm, paying attention to the world around me.

Donger
04-29-2005, 05:38 PM
maybe he borrowed someone else's cock to get the job done.

Those kids are adopted, IIRC. So, yeah, he did. They borrowed the whole package.

Logical
04-29-2005, 05:39 PM
I can't help but wonder how they came by this info. NTTAWWT

I was looking for a discreet view of the bearded clam in that picture. I was really disappointed.

Skip Towne
04-29-2005, 05:41 PM
Umm, paying attention to the world around me.
Your world must be a little "different" than ours.

ENDelt260
04-29-2005, 05:42 PM
Your world must be a little "different" than ours.
Well, he does live in St. Louis, after all.

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 05:43 PM
Your world must be a little "different" than ours.
Well, I guess it's not a worry in Arkansas, because cows can't talk.

Mr. Laz
04-29-2005, 05:44 PM
Those kids are adopted, IIRC. So, yeah, he did. They borrowed the whole package.
ouch...


surely he wouldn't have that schweet redhead piece in his bed every night and not try to hit it a few times at least.

ENDelt260
04-29-2005, 05:45 PM
What in the world?

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 05:46 PM
What in the world?
I must've missed that episode of Seinfeld.

Donger
04-29-2005, 05:46 PM
ouch...


surely he wouldn't have that schweet redhead piece in his bed every night and not try to hit it a few times at least.

I've not dated in a while, but she looks blonde to me.

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 05:47 PM
I've not dated in a while, but she looks blonde to me.
She's naturally a strawberry blonde.

Donger
04-29-2005, 05:49 PM
She's naturally a strawberry blonde.

I'm probably the only person to have the immortal words of Booger in my head right now: "We have bush! We HAVE Bush!"

Baby Lee
04-29-2005, 05:51 PM
I'm probably the only person to have the immortal words of Booger in my head right now: "We have bush! We HAVE Bush!"
Poindexter - Aaahhhhkkk - aahhhh!!!!

BTW - Trivial fact. Louis' dad went on to pronounce "that'll do, pig" a decade later.

Donger
04-29-2005, 05:52 PM
Poindexter - Aaahhhhkkk - aahhhh!!!!

ROFL

My brothers had to explain that one to me.

Baby Lee
04-30-2005, 09:36 AM
And now, enjoy this article with the benefit of the subtext provided herein.

http://www.nypost.com/entertainment/45588.htm

htismaqe
04-30-2005, 10:19 AM
Well, I guess it's not a worry in Arkansas, because cows can't talk.

ROFL

htismaqe
04-30-2005, 10:20 AM
I can't help but wonder how they came by this info. NTTAWWT

Some of us have lived in larger more cosmopolitan areas, as opposed to your shack with the corrugated metal roof. :D

htismaqe
04-30-2005, 10:20 AM
That's precisely why I titled the thread "If it's a beard, it's a d@mn good one."
If anything, this is the development that settles it for once and for all that the rumors have been FOS, or at least the byproduct of some experimental phase earlier in his life.
I mean, how long have Bowie and Iman been married now? And he's had the most famous lips in rock and roll around his hangdown. ROFL ROFL

Come on, now. Bowie said long ago that it was all an act...Ziggy was bi-sexual, he wasn't. :D

Baby Lee
04-30-2005, 10:32 AM
Come on, now. Bowie said long ago that it was all an act...Ziggy was bi-sexual, he wasn't. :D
Actually, I was basing that tongue in cheek reference on whichever of Mick Jagger's ex-wives said that she found Dave and Mick naked and spooning, passed out drunk, in her/their bed.

Brock
04-30-2005, 10:35 AM
Whoa....I didn't know this either.

I can see that, but what I don't get is how she would be planning on marrying someone, a straight guy even, and then breaking up with said fiance' only to be courting herself with a guy who is presumeably bi-sexual. That doesn't make sense. And don't tell me Tommy boy gave her a fat check for half a millon to court him- she can get the same dough from any of the other actors.

She's dating the top male actor in the world. I'd say she upgraded her career instantly.

Baby Lee
04-30-2005, 10:43 AM
She's dating the top male actor in the world. I'd say she upgraded her career instantly.
I loved Pieces of April and loved her IN Pieces of April, but her movie career hasn't exactly skyrocketed.
I defy people to watch that movie and not 'get something in your eye' at the end.

Brock
04-30-2005, 10:48 AM
I loved Pieces of April and loved her IN Pieces of April, but her movie career hasn't exactly skyrocketed.
I defy people to watch that movie and not 'get something in your eye' at the end.


I would be willing to bet she's in a top flight movie by next summer. Hanging out with Tom didn't hurt Penelope Cruz at all.

Frazod
04-30-2005, 10:50 AM
Damn, she towers over Cruise. Either she's very tall or he's very short. Maybe both.

Baby Lee
04-30-2005, 10:53 AM
I would be willing to bet she's in a top flight movie by next summer. Hanging out with Tom didn't hurt Penelope Cruz at all.
She's talented in her own right. Can't stand her personally, but I recognize she's talented. And Vanilla Sky wasn't exactly a blockbuster. If anything she infused youth in the aging Cruise, much like Penelope 2.0, errr Katie will do.

Baby Lee
04-30-2005, 10:53 AM
Damn, she towers over Cruise. Either she's very tall or he's very short. Maybe both.
Tom is very short, perhaps as short as 5'3", 5'4". He's officially listed at 5'7", but that is a subject of wild speculation as well. You'll notice that his height is often listed as "sources say. . . "

Frazod
04-30-2005, 10:54 AM
Tom is very short, 5'3", 5'4".

Didn't know that. Christ, I'd tower over him.

htismaqe
04-30-2005, 11:57 AM
Actually, I was basing that tongue in cheek reference on whichever of Mick Jagger's ex-wives said that she found Dave and Mick naked and spooning, passed out drunk, in her/their bed.

I know, I was being facetious.

Let's see, he hung around with Jagger, Elton John, Iggy Pop, Freddie Mercury, Lou Reed, and was possibly the central figure in the early 70's glitter scene. And now he's trying to tell everybody he wasn't really bi, it was all just an act...

shaneo69
04-30-2005, 12:05 PM
I would be willing to bet she's in a top flight movie by next summer. Hanging out with Tom didn't hurt Penelope Cruz at all.

Isn't she in Batman Begins?

Bowser
04-30-2005, 12:05 PM
Man, I hope I get to be rich and famous when I hit my mid-life crisis!

Infidel Goat
05-03-2005, 09:33 AM
If it's a beard, it looks like Tom did his homework.

http://www.azcentral.com/ent/celeb/articles/0429holmes.html

"What seems more shocking than the age difference is the virginity issue. Ananova.com reports that Holmes, who has been dubbed Hollywood's 'mild child', has said that she's actually saving herself for Mr. Right and there'll be no sex before marriage."

--Infidel Goat