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View Full Version : Men: You think you have the perfect "unit"?


Simplex3
05-02-2005, 08:42 AM
******* ATTN GOAT: This article is not for you! ********

ROFL

http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=29&art_id=vn20050430105105766C772968#121

Wanted: model man for new dildo

April 30 2005 at 01:56PM

By Noor-Jehan Yoro Badat

First we cloned Dolly, now Willy. A cast kit with the name Clone-a-Willy is available on the Internet and is needed to enter a competition that promises to rock women's worlds and give the winner a head start.

According to the British tabloid Sun newspaper, "the hunt is on for the fella with the perfect manhood - to model for a new sex aid".

"Blokes who reckon they measure up will have to take a cast of their pride and joy at home, then send it to bosses at the sex shop chain Hustler Hollywood to be judged."

'The only time I'd ever put my penis in plaster ... would be if it was broken, like one's arm'
The winning entry, writes the paper, will be "the model for a series of battery-powered rubber replicas that may find their way into thousands of women's bedrooms".

Kits are available at www.hustlerhollywood.co.uk
The site says anyone interested in entering should "follow the instructions and, hey presto - a perfect replica of your proud member". It sells in Britain for 19,99 (R232).

Inquiries about its availability in South Africa proved fruitless.

Could it possibly be that Britain is afraid of competition from our better-endowed South African men?

When well-known comedian Marc Lottering was asked what he thought of the competition, his initial response was silence.

Then he good-naturedly said: "Please would you phone me back in 40 minutes because I was just having a curry for lunch, and as you were explaining it to me I was reaching out for my cucumber, so this doesn't make a good combination."

Later Lottering SMS'd a more succinct comment: "The only time I'd ever put my penis in plaster of Paris, with a sling from my neck, would be if it was broken, like one's arm. Ooh, interesting visual."

Satirist Peter Dirk-Uys, whose famous alter ego is Evita Bezuidenhout, laughed and said, "How fascinating, but "No, darling", he would not enter.

"People have too much time on their hands," Dirk-Uys remarked.

"Maybe we should make chocolates out of it and give it to the audience... It's a great idea, better than making war."

Phobia
05-02-2005, 08:46 AM
I ordered one and ended up having entirely too much plaster of paris.

JOhn
05-02-2005, 08:47 AM
I ordered one and ended up having entirely too much plaster of paris.
Well in that case I better order two kits. :)

Rain Man
05-02-2005, 08:48 AM
This would be a great honor, and the theoretical implications are staggering.

Braincase
05-02-2005, 08:49 AM
I got my kit...and got plastered by Paris.

Phobia
05-02-2005, 08:50 AM
Well in that case I better order two kits. :)

Yes, you had better. Or maybe just some extra plaster of paris. Heh heh. Dumbass.

siberian khatru
05-02-2005, 08:50 AM
This Unit was perfect on May 18, 2004:

http://www.decaturdaily.com/decaturdaily/sports/040519/perfect.jpg

Iowanian
05-02-2005, 08:53 AM
In effort to save them shipping costs, I'm going to just write them a letter telling them to add my entry, by stacking 2 beer cans, with a Red Delicious apple on top with a couple of twislers glued to the side.

that should be close enough.

SBK
05-02-2005, 10:13 AM
In effort to save them shipping costs, I'm going to just write them a letter telling them to add my entry, by stacking 2 beer cans, with a Red Delicious apple on top with a couple of twislers glued to the side.

that should be close enough.

ROFL--Twizzlers. HAHA.

Simplex3
05-02-2005, 10:25 AM
ROFL--Twizzlers. HAHA.
I didn't think they made blue twizzlers? :shrug:

SBK
05-02-2005, 10:27 AM
I didn't think they made blue twizzlers? :shrug:

I bet he passes out from blood loss to his head when he sports wood that thick.....

:)

Iowanian
05-02-2005, 10:29 AM
just run one down the bottom side, and wrap the other around like a double helix of the DNA pic....

thats your plaster cast Champion my friends. Hopefully your casts, won't be confused as a worm from the apple.

Phobia
05-02-2005, 10:30 AM
just run one down the bottom side, and wrap the other around like a double helix of the DNA pic....

thats your plaster cast Champion my friends. Hopefully your casts, won't be confused as a worm from the apple.

Since JOhn needs double the plaster, maybe he's a candidate.

SBK
05-02-2005, 10:32 AM
just run one down the bottom side, and wrap the other around like a double helix of the DNA pic....

thats your plaster cast Champion my friends. Hopefully your casts, won't be confused as a worm from the apple.

What kind of beer can? Im sure you'd need those Heineken mini kegs type cans right?

Simplex3
05-02-2005, 10:34 AM
I bet he passes out from blood loss to his head when he sports wood that thick.....

:)
From what, the effort of pumping that long?

http://www.cairotec.com/images/piUrology_MarkII2.jpg

morphius
05-02-2005, 10:36 AM
just run one down the bottom side, and wrap the other around like a double helix of the DNA pic....

thats your plaster cast Champion my friends. Hopefully your casts, won't be confused as a worm from the apple.
Whats really impressive is that it has hands and can type...

blueballs
02-23-2009, 03:44 PM
Damn it-the plaster of Paris fell off this morning
and I can't order another kit
oh well it took forever to get off anyway

Katipan
02-23-2009, 03:50 PM
I hear the plaster of Paris has gonorrhea.

Mr. Flopnuts
02-23-2009, 03:57 PM
Damn it-the plaster of Paris fell off this morning
and I can't order another kit
oh well it took forever to get off anyway

You did a forum search on the word member didn't you........

Count Zarth
02-23-2009, 03:58 PM
I missed this the first time.

Iowanian
02-23-2009, 03:59 PM
Holy shit that iow anian is a funny sona-bitch.

Buck
02-23-2009, 04:03 PM
Iowanian, why have you been adding a space to your name lately?

gblowfish
02-23-2009, 04:13 PM
April 2005?
Think we're a little late to get onto this bandwagon...