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View Full Version : Phil's "special purpose" is three inches long and tastes like cotton candy.


ENDelt260
08-27-2005, 11:06 PM
Remember kids, when you drink and dial... everyone loses.

tk13
08-27-2005, 11:08 PM
Including us now that you've decided to share that bit of news.

Mr. Kotter
08-27-2005, 11:15 PM
:spock:

:hmmm:

alanm
08-27-2005, 11:18 PM
I think I know. But I'm not sure I know as much as I think I think I know. :shrug:

luv
08-27-2005, 11:20 PM
At three inches, what purpose does it have? It may taste like cotton candy, but I'm on a diet.

Phobia
08-27-2005, 11:21 PM
Those broads wouldn't know 3 inches if it crashed into their tonsils.

luv
08-27-2005, 11:23 PM
Those broads wouldn't know 3 inches if it crashed into their tonsils.
Oh, are we using male measurements or metric?

Mr. Kotter
08-27-2005, 11:24 PM
Remember kids, when you drink and dial... everyone loses.


I'm gonna give Phil the benefit of the doubt.....he got really drunk tonight, bought a cotton candy flavored condom fo a night of fun; but he couldn't get the "soldier to attention" because he was three sheets to the wind.

Then the goofy dude called you to tell you, and to seek comfort for his failure to "perform"; and you, being the sensitive and empathetic confidante', of course....brought his dilemma to the board? :hmmm:

Heh. :shrug:

Phobia
08-27-2005, 11:31 PM
The real truth is Joe and I found a couple 280 lbs heifers and decided we'd call RyanB to see if he was interested in a sure thing for October. Heifer #1 decided to tell a goofy story about small penises. I showed her the real deal after the phone call was over.

Mr. Kotter
08-27-2005, 11:35 PM
The real truth is Joe and I found a couple 280 lbs heifers and decided we'd call RyanB to see if he was interested in a sure thing for October. Heifer #1 decided to tell a goofy story about small penises. I showed her the real deal after the phone call was over.

RyanB? Or Brian? ROFL

Phobia
08-27-2005, 11:37 PM
RyanB? Or Brian? ROFL

Heifer #1 asked his name and she got "Ryan" out of what he said. He told her to add a "B" and she came up with ryanB. Heh heh.

BigMeatballDave
08-27-2005, 11:38 PM
Those broads wouldn't know 3 inches if it crashed into their tonsils.
ROFL

Mr. Kotter
08-27-2005, 11:39 PM
Heifer #1 asked his name and she got "Ryan" out of what he said. He told her to add a "B" and she came up with ryanB. Heh heh.

Nice, LOL.

Maybe we can get them to plug the hole in our DL when we CUT Siavii's ass? :hmmm:

:banghead:

luv
08-27-2005, 11:45 PM
STFU

Mr. Kotter
08-27-2005, 11:46 PM
STFU

You're not one of those "it's not the size that matters" girls, eh?

:p

luv
08-27-2005, 11:48 PM
You're not one of those "it's not the size that matters" girls, eh?

:p
Nah, why stroke his ego? Well, maybe because of the lack of something else to stroke, I guess.

Phobia
08-27-2005, 11:48 PM
I'm just kidding. The heifers part of the story was for ryanB. These chicks were very nice looking, happily married broads.

luv
08-27-2005, 11:50 PM
I'm just kidding. The heifers part of the story was for ryanB. These chicks were very nice looking, happily married broads.
You're not corrupting them by having them read this filth, are you?

Phobia
08-27-2005, 11:54 PM
I'm pretty sure they corrupted me. I was attempting to be a perfect gentleman as I am known to be all night long. And then the game ended and they drank the rest of the beer and we called ryanB. They showed another side of themselves on the phone. I was shocked and apalled. I'm still reeling from the entire experience....

Mr. Kotter
08-27-2005, 11:56 PM
I'm pretty sure they corrupted me. I was attempting to be a perfect gentleman as I am known to be all night long. And then the game ended and they drank the rest of the beer and we called ryanB. They showed another side of themselves on the phone. I was shocked and apalled. I'm still reeling from the entire experience....

You gonna give us the play-by-play or not? :hmmm:

luv
08-27-2005, 11:56 PM
I'm pretty sure they corrupted me. I was attempting to be a perfect gentleman as I am known to be all night long. And then the game ended and they drank the rest of the beer and we called ryanB. They showed another side of themselves on the phone. I was shocked and apalled. I'm still reeling from the entire experience....
Oh stop your whining. Corruption is fun! :thumb:

Phobia
08-27-2005, 11:57 PM
You gonna give us the play-by-play or not? :hmmm:

I think that's been done.

Got drunk. Called Brian. Gave phone to drunk girls.

They said 3 inches. Brian posts thread.

Here I am.

luv
08-27-2005, 11:58 PM
I think that's been done.

Got drunk. Called Brian. Gave phone to drunk girls.

They said 3 inches. Brian posts thread.

Here I am.
Okay, uh, where does cotton candy flavored come into play in all this?

Phobia
08-28-2005, 12:00 AM
I'm really unsure. Cotton candy makes no sense to me. Maybe Joe knows.

Mr. Kotter
08-28-2005, 12:02 AM
I think that's been done.

Got drunk. Called Brian. Gave phone to drunk girls.

They said 3 inches. Brian posts thread.

Here I am.

Okay. Just thought you might be leavin' out some important details.....

luv
08-28-2005, 12:03 AM
Okay. Just thought you might be leavin' out some important details.....
I think he is. I'm not gonna hold my breath waiting to find out why cotton candy is mentioned in the thread title. :hmmm:

Phobia
08-28-2005, 12:04 AM
I don't think there are any other important details. My wife wasn't there. I'm guessing she'll come the next time because the broads really couldn't keep their hands off my fabulous body and dominant jersey. Chicks dig me. What can I say?

luv
08-28-2005, 12:06 AM
I don't think there are any other important details. My wife wasn't there. I'm guessing she'll come the next time because the broads really couldn't keep their hands off my fabulous body and dominant jersey. Chicks dig me. What can I say?
Alone with a bunch of drunk women without your wife? :shake:
You'll learn.

:p

Phobia
08-28-2005, 12:06 AM
I'm unsure where the cotton candy quip came from. Sounds fun to me, though.

luv
08-28-2005, 12:09 AM
I'm unsure where the cotton candy quip came from. Sounds fun to me, though.
Cotton canday flavored...nah.
Did you happen to eat cotton candy before visiting the restroom? :hmmm:

Mr. Kotter
08-28-2005, 12:10 AM
I'm unsure where the cotton candy quip came from. Sounds fun to me, though.

Heh...does Pink know?

tommykat
08-28-2005, 12:10 AM
Alone with a bunch of drunk women without your wife? :shake:
You'll learn.

:p

Pink puts up with alot of chit from him....What can I say? I know them both and they are a good couple.

luv
08-28-2005, 12:11 AM
Pink puts up with alot of chit from him....What can I say? I know them both and they are a good couple.
Isn't it past your bedtime? :p

Mr. Kotter
08-28-2005, 12:11 AM
Isn't it past your bedtime? :p



SHHHHHHHHh!

Don't scare her away; this could be fun....heh. :hmmm:

tommykat
08-28-2005, 12:13 AM
Isn't it past your bedtime? :p

Thought the same as I was being nice........:shrug: Something just came over me...ROFL

luv
08-28-2005, 12:13 AM
SHHHHHHHHh!

Don't scare her away; this could be fun....heh. :hmmm:
What would be fun is if I could talk her into going to the party Saturday at 37 forever weekend. She could drive up with me. Then go to the game with dad while I drive home on Sunday.

Mr. Kotter
08-28-2005, 12:14 AM
What would be fun is if I could talk her into going to the party Saturday at 37 forever weekend. She could drive up with me. Then go to the game with dad while I drive home on Sunday.

She isn't coming? Why not?

Phobia
08-28-2005, 12:14 AM
Heh...does Pink know?

I don't think so, but maybe she'll read this thread and resolve my ignorance.

luv
08-28-2005, 12:14 AM
Heh...does Pink know?
I wonder how much that body candy is? :hmmm:

luv
08-28-2005, 12:15 AM
She isn't coming? Why not?
I was still thinking of coming, but I don't want to go alone. I hadn't talked to her about it. Just thought of the idea.

Phobia
08-28-2005, 12:15 AM
Pink puts up with alot of chit from him....What can I say? I know them both and they are a good couple.

Yeah, she does. Heh heh. We make it work, though. Somehow.

Mr. Kotter
08-28-2005, 12:16 AM
I don't think so, but maybe she'll read this thread and resolve my ignorance.

Better yet, maybe she'll buy some of that over at Priscilla's..... :)

Mr. Kotter
08-28-2005, 12:16 AM
I was still thinking of coming, but I don't want to go alone. I hadn't talked to her about it. Just thought of the idea.

Kathy? :hmmm:

tommykat
08-28-2005, 12:17 AM
What would be fun is if I could talk her into going to the party Saturday at 37 forever weekend. She could drive up with me. Then go to the game with dad while I drive home on Sunday.

You paying??? I didn't drink at the last one.....go figure....BobDole was to blame as was Raush? and a few more that kept me up most of that night!
Love Fraz tho.....;) Just not Brads bed so much......whewwwww

luv
08-28-2005, 12:17 AM
Better yet, maybe she'll buy some of that over at Priscilla's..... :)
You guys have a Priscilla's too? Is the logo, "Where fun and fantasy meet"?

Phobia
08-28-2005, 12:18 AM
Bob Dole, Fraz, and Rausch kept you up most of the night?

Please, please, please come up this year.

luv
08-28-2005, 12:19 AM
You paying??? I didn't drink at the last one.....go figure....BobDole was to blame as was Raush? and a few more that kept me up most of that night!
Love Fraz tho.....;) Just not Brads bed so much......whewwwww
As you probably know, I just came into a little bit of extra cash. I could spare, what, $37 x 2? Something like that.

Mr. Kotter
08-28-2005, 12:19 AM
You guys have a Priscilla's too? Is the logo, "Where fun and fantasy meet"?

Eh....I think it's called Annabelle's here.....but I grew up in the KC area, and make it back for the games quite a bit.

Mr. Kotter
08-28-2005, 12:20 AM
You paying??? I didn't drink at the last one.....go figure....BobDole was to blame as was Raush? and a few more that kept me up most of that night!
Love Fraz tho.....;) Just not Brads bed so much......whewwwww

Can someone translate that for us? :hmmm:

ROFL

tommykat
08-28-2005, 12:20 AM
Bob Dole, Fraz, and Rausch kept you up most of the night?

Please, please, please come up this year.

ROFL I dare not touch this....

luv
08-28-2005, 12:22 AM
As you probably know, I just came into a little bit of extra cash. I could spare, what, $37 x 2? Something like that.
I could make it your early b-day present.

tommykat
08-28-2005, 12:24 AM
I could make it your early b-day present.

That's cool.......No can do..........I work Fridays and Saturdays now.........I'll take the few hundreds bucks I make instead. ;)

luv
08-28-2005, 12:26 AM
That's cool.......No can do..........I work Fridays and Saturdays now.........I'll take the few hundreds bucks I make instead. ;)
Okie dokie. I was thinking we could head down whenever you got off of work that Saturday. Never mind.

tommykat
08-28-2005, 12:34 AM
Okie dokie. I was thinking we could head down whenever you got off of work that Saturday. Never mind.

We would hardly make it there.............but it would be fun................more fun is Fri-Sun ;)

luv
08-28-2005, 12:35 AM
We would hardly make it there.............but it would be fun................more fun is Fri-Sun ;)
No way am I going by myself for a whole weekend. I'm still contemplating one night!

Nzoner
08-28-2005, 12:55 AM
I'm really unsure. Cotton candy makes no sense to me. Maybe Joe knows.

I know nothing.

morphius
08-28-2005, 01:05 AM
I don't think there are any other important details. My wife wasn't there. I'm guessing she'll come the next time because the broads really couldn't keep their hands off my fabulous body and dominant jersey. Chicks dig me. What can I say?
It was my "bedroom eyes" that got them in the mood, I just left the rest up to you.

Nzoner
08-28-2005, 08:50 AM
It was my "bedroom eyes" that got them in the mood, I just left the rest up to you.

Dude you should've followed through,Dana thought you were hot.

morphius
08-28-2005, 09:14 AM
Dude you should've followed through,Dana thought you were hot.
Damn it! I knew I should have broken out a cart wheel to lock the deal.

Cntrygal
08-28-2005, 09:32 AM
:spock:

I'm not sure what I've missed since I haven't been around..... and I'm not sure I want to find out.

JazzzLovr
08-28-2005, 09:33 AM
Can someone translate that for us? :hmmm:

ROFL

I was there, and I know what she meant, but I bet the real story would be a lot less entertaining than letting tommykat try to explain it.

:evil:

morphius
08-28-2005, 10:10 AM
I was there, and I know what she meant, but I bet the real story would be a lot less entertaining than letting tommykat try to explain it.

:evil:
Thanks again!!! You kind of disappeared on me and I couldn't thank you again.

JazzzLovr
08-28-2005, 10:16 AM
Thanks again!!! You kind of disappeared on me and I couldn't thank you again.

We went back to B5 for a little while before the game, then went into the stadium early. I had planned on dropping back by after the game, since our seats were at Gate H anyway, but then we ended up sitting near Stevieray and Weirdwolf for the second half, which is in the opposite end zone. So after the game, we just walked back with Stevie and his family to B5.

That Larry Johnson touchdown was right in front of ya, wasn't it? :)

Oh, and you're welcome again. :)

morphius
08-28-2005, 10:28 AM
We went back to B5 for a little while before the game, then went into the stadium early. I had planned on dropping back by after the game, since our seats were at Gate H anyway, but then we ended up sitting near Stevieray and Weirdwolf for the second half, which is in the opposite end zone. So after the game, we just walked back with Stevie and his family to B5.

That Larry Johnson touchdown was right in front of ya, wasn't it? :)

Oh, and you're welcome again. :)
Yes it was! I knew I should have stopped by B5 after the game.

Yosef_Malkovitch
08-28-2005, 11:16 AM
I like cheese!

ENDelt260
08-28-2005, 12:20 PM
The real truth is Joe and I found a couple 280 lbs heifers and decided we'd call RyanB

ROFL No, no... it's Ryab.

ENDelt260
08-28-2005, 12:23 PM
I'm really unsure. Cotton candy makes no sense to me. Maybe Joe knows.
The first girl told me your penis tasted like cotton candy. After she said it was only 3 inches long.

Baby Lee
08-28-2005, 12:23 PM
ROFL No, no... it's Ryab.
Captain Ryab!!!

Well call me Ishmael.

Baby Lee
08-28-2005, 12:25 PM
The first girl told me your penis tasted like cotton candy. After she said it was only 3 inches long.
So, it disappeared to nothingness on her tongue?

Phobia
08-28-2005, 12:25 PM
That girl was more obnoxious than me. Can you believe that?

Bowser
08-28-2005, 12:25 PM
So, it disappeared to nothingness on her tongue?

If she really was 280 lbs, I have no doubt about it.


:D

Bowser
08-28-2005, 12:26 PM
That girl was more obnoxious than me. Can you believe that?

You gotta work on that delivery, bub. :)

ENDelt260
08-28-2005, 12:27 PM
That girl was more obnoxious than me. Can you believe that?
No.

Lzen
08-28-2005, 12:57 PM
Oh, are we using male measurements or metric?

Metric inches. ;)

morphius
08-28-2005, 01:14 PM
No.
She climbed on top of a car to try to look into a port-a-pisser because some guy was inside changing and she did burp louder then Phobia too.

Morphius
Amazed what women find me "hot".

Lzen
08-28-2005, 01:15 PM
You paying??? I didn't drink at the last one.....go figure....BobDole was to blame as was Raush? and a few more that kept me up most of that night!
Love Fraz tho.....;) Just not Brads bed so much......whewwwww

http://instagiber.net/smiliesdotcom/cwm/cwm/eek2.gif

Nzoner
08-28-2005, 01:53 PM
She climbed on top of a car to try to look into a port-a-pisser because some guy was inside changing and she did burp louder then Phobia too.

Not to mention she told the girl with the guy changing she saw absolutely NOTHING.

pink
09-05-2005, 06:15 PM
Heh...does Pink know?
i do now.

Archie F. Swin
09-05-2005, 06:32 PM
username/posts

luv2rite/ 19
Mr. Kotter/ 14
Phobia/ 13

this thread is officially a circle jerk

chiefs4me
09-05-2005, 06:40 PM
i do now.





ROFL....busted

Herzig
09-05-2005, 06:58 PM
i do now.

Rut row raggy.