View Full Version : Prayer request...

09-25-2005, 04:47 PM
I never really imagined that I would make a post like this. I honestly donít really know what I expect by doing it Ė I think it will be a chance to vent a little and I suppose Iím looking for some supportive words. Over the years Iíve come to realize that we have some very, very caring, smart, supportive, intelligent and plain ol super people here. Iíve been fortunate enough to meet a few of you and that only reinforced my beliefs about this community.

Here we go Ė in the last two years my life has completely been turned up side down Ė some good and some very bad.

About 2 years ago I was recruited away from my former employer to one of our largest competitors. It was a very hard decision for a number of reasons but I packed my family up and moved to Chicago. The job has been wonderful Ė I fully expect it will be all I had hoped and expected.

Itís all gone down hill from there. It took about the entire 2 years to sell my home in Wisconsin and for about Ĺ of that time I had to pay two house payments and for those of you that live in Chicago Ė you know what homes cost here (I'm one step below the level where the company would buy the house outright). It was a very trying time financially but we made it. I now have more credit card debt than Iíve ever had in my life Ė itís nasty, but Iím working through it.

Then last Christmas my wife of 10 years told me she is tired of my shit and told me she was taking our kids and moving back to Wisconsin. In June she left. I know live alone in a 700 sq ft studio (from a 3000 sq ft home) and have my kids 2x a month. Weíve still not filed for divorce, but as the days go by, I wish she would. Iím tired and I just want it to be over.

And now, to top it all off, I found out yesterday that my father has lung cancer. Heís going to die. My mother has been hiding from me how sick heís been for a few weeks now and had it not been for my sister in law calling yesterday and telling me Iím sure my mom still would not tell me. I tried to call him today, but he wonít take my call. My dad is such a proud man and I know what heís thinking. Heís embarrassed and heís scared and he doesnít want me to know or worry about him because of all the things that have been happening in my life that last few months. My mother is so very upset and I think sheís having a very hard time but she too is worried about bothering me with all this.

I told her that I would fly down there (Joplin) tomorrow morning first thing but they will have nothing to do with it. My brother and his wife are there and taking care of their business (they own an industrial cleaning business), but they are demanding that no one else from the family be there. My dadís brothers and sisters donít even know yet how bad he is.

I tell you, Iím not sure what to do anymore. The last few weeks Iíve finally found a way to swallow my pride and started seeing a psychologist. Iíve joined a support group and I thought I was finally starting to find a way out of this mess. Iím exploring going back to school. Iím working on being social to my kidís mother and Iím finding ways to not be so mad all the time. Iím scared, Iím sad and Iím lost.

So, if you took the time to read to this point, I would only ask that you just pray for my mom and dad and all my family.


09-25-2005, 04:51 PM
Done. Hang in there bud, it will all work out in the long run. Best of luck to you and your family.

09-25-2005, 05:04 PM
Hang in there, and I will definitely send a prayer your way.

I think we all go through rough times, just some worse than others. It's how you handle it that makes a difference and will make you a better person for it.

the Talking Can
09-25-2005, 05:09 PM
Go see your father.

Given the situation you won't regret spending time with him, regardless of the defenses he's put up.

illness requires honesty from everybody...good luck, and good health to you and your family

09-25-2005, 05:16 PM
I agree with Talking. Go see your father before you regret it. I know I regretted not seeing my grandmother before she died. I hated myself for that, and still do to this day.

My prayers are with you bro.

Rain Man
09-25-2005, 05:26 PM
Gosh. Sorry to hear about it, wischief. It sounds like a rough time. Hang in there.

09-25-2005, 05:31 PM
My thoughts and best wishes are with you, Wis...

09-25-2005, 05:52 PM

My Father was recently diagnosed with lung cancer also....my advice is to go see him. They will tell you that everything is fine, but it's just pride talking.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers.....IM me if you want to chat about anything that they tell you about the treatments that they are doing at this time....I have read up on a great deal of this since they diagnosed my Dad.


09-25-2005, 06:05 PM
will most definately lift you and your family up in prayer. also i agree with the others, go see your dad.soon

Old Dog
09-25-2005, 06:08 PM
Prayers on the way. Go see your Dad. My guess is that you'll regret it later if you didn't. As for the money issues, things will work out in time. You said yourself that you're working through it. Take it one day at a time.

God be with you.

09-25-2005, 06:12 PM
No matter what your father is telling you, go see him, dont wait a minute longer.....and my prayers to you and your family.

09-25-2005, 06:12 PM
I didn't put this in my first post, but I agree with these guys, go see your dad, or you may end up regretting it down the road. Best of luck my friend.


09-25-2005, 06:15 PM
You need to get your kids back in your life-that is more important than a job. Move to where they live-period. Mu kids are my rock and helped me through a nasty divorce. Hang in there.

09-25-2005, 06:33 PM
You need to get your kids back in your life-that is more important than a job. Move to where they live-period. Mu kids are my rock and helped me through a nasty divorce. Hang in there.

But go to your Dad!!! Been through this, don't even think otherwise!!!!

09-25-2005, 06:42 PM
Done. Best of luck and hang in there. It's the tough times in life that make good times sweet.

09-25-2005, 06:55 PM
Prayers sent skyward bro......best of luck

father had cancer,made me even closer to my mom

Mr. Kotter
09-25-2005, 08:41 PM
Wow. I'm sorry for your difficult times. Life sure can hand us some tough cards sometimes.

I'll put your family in our family's prayers. Take it one day at a time; and try to keep a positive attitude--as difficult as it may be.

Best wishes.

09-25-2005, 08:52 PM
Sorry for your problems with cancer and your wife.
Prayer to you and your family.

09-25-2005, 09:05 PM
My thoughts and Prayers go out to you and your family. I don't know what your theological beliefs or upbringing is, but the fact that youíre asking for prayer suggests that you know in where your help lies. Just remember God will not allow you to go through more than you can handle if you have your trust in Him. Sorry for the sermon. God Bless, Bud and hang in there it will eventually get better.

KS Smitty
09-25-2005, 09:12 PM
I never really imagined that I would make a post like this.

Those of us that have never do, Wis, but most of the replies make us glad we do. Prayers to you and yours.

I have to agree with everyone else, go see your Dad, everything you do will bring some relief to not only him but to your mom and brother. Personal comment: if I had not taken it upon myself to go to Mom and Dad's when I did no one would have said boo, but this type of thing needs to be "shared" for lack of a better word.

On your marriage, I am so sorry that happened, but it sounds like your resigned to it's ending. Again echoing other comments, please do your best to keep in contact with your kids, try not to let the break-up affect your treatment of them and your wife. I have had no experience in this, but I wish you luck.

09-25-2005, 10:00 PM
I will be sure to send some words to The Man upstairs. Hang in there, bud. Best wishes.

J Diddy
09-25-2005, 11:04 PM
You got it.

Archie F. Swin
09-25-2005, 11:23 PM
Does your Dad live in Lawton, or do you not have any family there anymore?

09-26-2005, 12:13 AM
Man, what a bummer. Thoughts and prayers go out to you and yours. I like to believe that things happen for a reason, even when the reason might escape us...hang in there pard.

09-26-2005, 12:38 AM
You're going through a pretty tough time it sounds like. I'll keep your future in my prayers

09-26-2005, 12:46 AM
You got it. Stay strong.

09-26-2005, 01:43 AM
Done. You take care my man and bless you and your family. Things will be ok I hope. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Keep your chin up and be strong !

09-26-2005, 03:08 AM
you got it

09-26-2005, 05:48 AM

You will be in my thoughts.

Has minimal problems by comparison.

09-26-2005, 07:25 AM
My thoughts and prayers are with you. There might some good that comes from all of it. It sounds like the problems with your Dad could really help you in other areas of your life. Good luck to you, and I hope everything takes a turn for the better.

09-26-2005, 08:03 AM
consider it done, no one deserves to have stuff like that to happen.

Keep your head up, things will get better .

09-26-2005, 08:19 AM
I prayed for you, your father, your family, marriage, kids, etc...

Hang in there bro. I have a friend whose parents live in Wisconsin and his father has lung cancer. He was very aloof and prideful at first too. But my friend kept with it. He kept going to see him in Wisconsin (my friend lives in Dallas). Over time, the barriers came down and he has a pretty good friendship with his father now.

Iron Chef
09-26-2005, 08:31 AM

09-26-2005, 08:35 AM

I'm really sorry to hear about all this, especially the news about your Father. I had to say goodbye to my Dad (cancer) 3.5 years ago. I found a lot of solace in the amount of time I got to spend with my Dad in the last years of his life. I encourage you to try and do that as well.

You and your family are in my prayers. You're a tough guy, and I know that you will find your way through these troubled times. Stay positive and keep going to those support group meetings.


PS - If it helps, I'll let you kick my a$$ the next time I get to Chicago;)

09-26-2005, 08:43 AM
chin up and don't give up.
best of luck to you and your family.

09-26-2005, 09:18 AM
Prayers for your family.

It's always darkest before dawn - which may sound like an old saying - which it is - but it is also frequently very true.

Hang in there - it will get better.

09-26-2005, 10:31 AM
Hang in there man. You did the right thing by joining a support group. Be sure to take help from others, you'll eventually see that others care about you which could help change your life if you let it.

09-26-2005, 11:09 AM
Done for you, Mom, Dad, the kids, and even your kid's mother.
I'm not very religious, but I believe in the power of prayer. (positive thinking) That stuff works!

09-26-2005, 11:54 AM
Hang in there. I don't know your relationship with your Dad. If he's like mine, he wants what's best for you and that's why he's saying don't visit because he's worried about you. Therefore, if it will make you feel better to see him, you should do that because he wants what's best for you.