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View Full Version : The Night Before the Donk Ass Kicking - by GoChiefs


Claynus
09-25-2005, 10:52 PM
'Twas the night before the Donk Ass Kicking, when all through Motel 6
Not a player was stirring, not even Eric Hicks

The playbooks were closed in their binders with care
In hopes that big plays soon would be there

The O-line were nestled all snug in their beds
While visions of pancake blocks danced in their heads

And Dick in his jammies, ready for a cry
Had just walked the field at stinky Mile High

When out near Invesco there arose such a clatter
Dick looked up in the sky to see what was the matter

Back to the field he flew like Fast Eddie
Ran on to the sideline, he was feeling quite heady

When, what to Dick's watering eyes should appear
But a chop-blocking line, and a coach that was queer

With a little old quarterback, so lively and quick
Any pass he threw was sure to be a pick

More rapid than eagles, Dicks weapons they came
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name

"Now Dante! Now Gonzo! Now Priest and Big Johnson!"

"On Patrick! On Sammy! On Kendrell and Johnson!"

"To end of the end zone! To the quarterback's call!"

"Now blitz away! Blitz away! Blitz away all!"

So back to the sideline these Donk killers flew
With plannings of sacks, and and interceptions too

And then in a twinkling, Dick heard from the tunnel
A defensive coach who knew how to pummel

Dick flashed a quick grin, and was turning around
Down the path came Gunther, like a ravenous hound

He was dressed all in red, from his head to his toe
And his glasses were yellow, but mainly for show

A bundle of plays he had clutched in his grip
The Donkos offense he was ready to rip

He had a good plan, to attack Denver's soft underbelly,
His primary weapon? A defensive tackle named jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly road grader.
Dick laughed when he saw him, 100 times as big as raiderhader

A wink of Gun's eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave Dick to know he had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And pored over his gampelan; then turned with a jerk,

And laying his glasses aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the tunnel he rose;

He sprang to his bus, to his defense gave a whistle,
And away they all drove, soon to be chewing Donk gristle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"HAPPY DONK ASS-KICKING TO ALL!
AND TO ALL, A GOOD NIGHT!"

ChiefFripp
09-25-2005, 10:56 PM
When, what to Dick's watering eyes should appear
But a chop-blocking line, and a coach that was queer






ROFL

SNR
09-25-2005, 11:09 PM
Back to the field he flew like Fast Eddie
Ran on to the sideline, he was feeling quite headyRan out of rhymes, didn't ya?

Still good though. Loved the queer coach line.

Claynus
09-25-2005, 11:12 PM
Ran out of rhymes, didn't ya?


You should have seen some of the lines I rejected.

In fact, I had to redo the first half of it when I realized talking about Arrowhead would be a total jinx since it's in Denver.

Kerberos
09-26-2005, 05:40 AM
Nice Read Cheese.

:thumb:


.

mikey23545
09-26-2005, 05:47 AM
Geez, I can't believe I've had to give you rep twice in the last week or two...But the queer coach line sealed the deal...

ROFL

Ari Chi3fs
09-26-2005, 05:59 AM
funny stuff.

on another note, ChiefFripp should post on every thread.

cookster50
09-26-2005, 06:56 AM
Nice read.

Claynus
09-26-2005, 11:49 AM
:D

SoCalBronco
09-26-2005, 11:52 AM
I feel obligated to post my reply from the Mane:

It was the night before game day,
with Bob on the computer, insisting as usual, that he wasnt gay.

He couldnt wait to see his Chiefs, he was hoping for utter domination
Ignoring the fact, that as a 23 yr. old parent's basement living virgin, his life was an abomination

He felt confident in Trent Green, he knew the coaching staff would come through,
little did he know that in 24 hours the Planet would be melting down, full of chants of "boo....boo".

Willie Roaf's gonna play, you Donk's are idiots he'd say,
only to find out that his entire OL couldnt even hold the real DJ at bay.

Bob calls our coach a queer and says Plummer's good for a few "pick six"
yet this is the same guy on the Planet who once said "only a guy like me could like chix with dix"

Bailey's overrated and Plummer's just a stupid putz?
Get real, GoChiefs, why dont you get off of Vermeil's Nuts.

Sitting in his bed, late at night, surrounded by his Star Wars toys
Fretting about the Chiefs Monday Night chances you say? Nah..he's just thinking of boys.

Priest's gonna run wild, LJ's gonna roll you, tomorrow night's gonna be so damn cool,
Wake up, Meatpeeker, by this time tomorrow you'll be exposed yet again as a blathering fool.

Donger
09-26-2005, 11:55 AM
I feel obligated to post my reply from the Mane:

It was the night before game day,
with Bob on the computer, insisting as usual, that he wasnt gay.

He couldnt wait to see his Chiefs, he was hoping for utter domination
Ignoring the fact, that as a 23 yr. old parent's basement living virgin, his life was an abomination

He felt confident in Trent Green, he knew the coaching staff would come through,
little did he know that in 24 hours the Planet would be melting down, full of chants of "boo....boo".

Willie Roaf's gonna play, you Donk's are idiots he'd say,
only to find out that his entire OL couldnt even hold the real DJ at bay.

Bob calls our coach a queer and says Plummer's good for a few "pick six"
yet this is the same guy on the Planet who once said "only a guy like me could like chix with dix"

Bailey's overrated and Plummer's just a stupid putz?
Get real, GoChiefs, why dont you get off of Vermeil's Nuts.

Sitting in his bed, late at night, surrounded by his Star Wars toys
Fretting about the Chiefs Monday Night chances you say? Nah..he's just thinking of boys.

Priest's gonna run wild, LJ's gonna roll you, tomorrow night's gonna be so damn cool,
Wake up, Meatpeeker, by this time tomorrow you'll be exposed yet again as a blathering fool.

ROFL

Although, I'm relatively sure I heard a few 'boos' in Denver last week.

wazu
09-26-2005, 12:22 PM
gochiefs and SoCal both win.

ChiefsFanatik88
09-26-2005, 12:35 PM
Rofl

Iowanian
09-26-2005, 01:01 PM
Eagerly pecking their keyboards, orangemane
they cry during Inros....Starting at RB,
that fat lard Ron Dayne

Jake as their QB, rolls to the flat
2 KC Lbers crush with a splat.
Our Johsons' are Big, Fast and quick like a cat

Donk fans and spider think the donks win for certain
After this loss they're hiding at home,
under their mama's, nasty meat curtains.

they hate sex their sisters and punch out their wives
A sorry existence, are donky fans lives.

Camaro and mullet and sister jokes silenced.
They've never seen Linebackers, play with such violence
With this loss their season, is effectively done
Now Donk fans signing up, for Smack 101.

Not even cheating on salary or chop blocking line
prevents Vermeil from enjoying...
his Victory Wine.

Now Step aside Donk fans and give me some room
You've had your ass kicked again
by the Keyboard of Dooooooooooooooom.

jidar
09-26-2005, 01:02 PM
Nice work!

fan4ever
09-26-2005, 01:50 PM
I want to know what these guys do for a living; having the time for re-writing poetry. I did think the rhyming "Johnson" with "Johnson" was brilliant, however.

:p

Iowanian
09-26-2005, 01:51 PM
Spider has nothing and nothing is new
His only smack in a tubesock..covered in goo

Gripping his thimble with finger and thumb
not knowing his smack is tired and dumb.

He'll watch tonights game, with really cheap booze
Employment an option but one he won't choose.

Its not spider's fandom that makes his thimble orange
Its cheetos, no job and downloaded pRon.

picasso
09-26-2005, 01:53 PM
One thing that SoCalBronco disregarded to post,
Was that Madden would proclaim “That the quarterback… is… TOAST!”

Again and again he would say the same thing,
The more that he’d say it the more it would sting.

“I tell ya that Johnson he’s BOOM up the middle!
I’m not surprised, Denver’s defense can do very little!”

Then finally reality would start to set in,
That the season was finished before it would begin.

So away would go Madden with Priest’s face on his bus,
as a chicken wing falls silent and settles in dust.

Iowanian
09-26-2005, 02:06 PM
The parking lot silent
Orangeforce one plays a sad song
the funeral procession
for the young season gone.

A loss to the Chiefs
Awaiting the Riot
If a mouse were to fart
the tention would light it.

Meck holding T@co, Crying in beer
Post season hopes over before they were here.
Your man hugs were Cool, pregame ES..PN
The Pain of your loss, sport Center's top 10.

picasso
09-26-2005, 02:09 PM
The parking lot silent
Orangeforce one plays a sad song
the funeral procession
for the young season gone.

A loss to the Chiefs
Awaiting the Riot
If a mouse were to fart
the tention would light it.

Meck holding T@co, Crying in beer
Post season hopes over before they were here.
Your man hugs were Cool, pregame ES..PN
The Pain of your loss, sport Center's top 10.

Love it!!! :clap:

GoTrav
09-26-2005, 02:31 PM
funny stuff.

on another note, ChiefFripp should post on every thread.

no kidding. I lose my train of thought for about ten seconds and can't.scroll.down

best line: When, what to Dick's watering eyes should appear
But a chop-blocking line, and a coach that was queer

good stuff

onescrewleftuntwisted
09-26-2005, 02:46 PM
ya'll got way to much time on your hands, got the dead poets in here

Taco John
09-27-2005, 03:22 AM
Ouch.

Claynus
09-27-2005, 03:28 AM
Ouch.

Eh. It'll be nice to have this for yearly posting. Tradition.

I should come up with a nice Arrowhead edition.

Kerberos
09-27-2005, 05:16 AM
Ouch.


Go ahead and ride high on the win last night..... Remeber what happened last year at Arrowhead?

Payback is a bitch ain't it!... I'm feeling some of it right NOW.


:D


Prepare for round two in December and don't forget to bring the crow.





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