View Full Version : Week 2 Doggity Report: Chiefs/Raiders

09-26-2005, 08:33 AM
Mr. Doggity's been in New Orleans helping with safety stuff for cleanup and recovery workers. He just got back this weekend, so this Doggity Report is late, but that's cool. You can read previous Doggity Reports at http://www.georgeblowfish.com/Mrdoggity2005.html

The Doggity Chiefs Report
Week 2 - 2005
Chiefs vs Convicts from Anonymous Virus Software Coliseum ("The Hole") -
Oakland, CA.
Kansas City - 23; San Quentin - 17

From a satellite dish at a tavern in the middle of nowhere. Sorry for the
long delay, but this was a particularly challenging work week. As always,
you can find the Doggity Reports from this and previous years at
www.georgeblowfish.com <http://www.georgeblowfish.com/> ! And visit "Radio Blowfish"- Music, comedy and stuff you never thought you'd hear on the radio. If you know others who might want to get this report in the 'junk' folder of their e-mail inbox - send me their addresses so we can add them to the rapidly expanding number of people who have nothing better to do than read the Doggity Report each week. Remember our privacy policy - "We won't give your address to any African prince needing a loan."

Overview - I wouldn't call it the best effort the Chiefs could muster, but
it was good enough to get a division win, on the road, in "The Hole". The
offense looked hesitant at first, relying on Jordan Black to cover Trent's
blindside and blow open the left side running attack. Let's just say Jordan
is a nice backup, but he's no Willie Roaf. The officiating stunk out loud -
and a couple of those blown calls helped KC. Both teams had TD's called back by penalties. The Raiders were the Raiders - dumb penalties, ill-timed meltdowns and choke-jobs. They are the Chris Farley of the NFL -- amazing amounts of talent, hellbent on self-destruction. Even still, the Chiefs showed more guts, more poise and better coaching. Together that was enough to both pull out the W and cover the spread.

Offense - You could tell that this offense was never really comfortable with
Jordan Black at left tackle. This unit lives on the left-side running game,
and it was never there in this contest. In addition, Oakland's D-coordinator
Rob (Son of Buddy) Ryan threw the playbook at the weakened KC line. There were some really squirrelly formations. Several times Ryan set his defense with just two down linemen and five linebackers. Washington and Sapp are effectively a four man line anyway. Warren Sapp and Ted Washington are very large humans. They dominated the fleet but comparatively petite Casey Weigmann. The vaunted Holmes/Johnson dynamic duo had to fight for every inch of real estate, but in the end, they were able to chew nearly 35 minutes offt the clock. That meant less time with Moss and Jordan on the field. The one area that really seemed to shine was the ability of Trent to get the ball to Gonzo and Chris Horn exactly when and where he needed to, to get critical first downs. Not nearly the fireworks we expect from this offense, but plenty good enough to get the job done.

Defense - They got burned a few times. Randy Moss, Jerry Porter and Lamont Jordan can do that to you. But for the second straight week they put the running game in a jar and screwed on the lid. Jordan was only able to scrape up 59 yards rushing. Ten of Oakland's 71 rushing yards came from Kerry "Todd" Collins running for his life. I'll take those yards. Their most impressive stand, I felt, was after the Samie Parker fumble in the fourth quarter. In an instant, it went from a drive that could have iced the game to a chance for the Raiders to comeback. But the erratic Collins and some good defense stalled that drive on downs at the end. The main thing is, the defense held in the fourth quarter when it mattered.

Special Teams - Tynes was as accurate as the former first-round pick, Sea
Bass for the Raiders, so not too bad. The punts were again very good. But
again, coverage was bad. I have no idea why Marc Boerigter has been inactive the last two games. The special kids could use him out there. The bone-head play of the day came when Jerome Woods threw a totally unnecessary block in the back, away from the play, negating an 84 yard TD return by Dante Hall.

The AFC West -
KC Chiefs - 2-0 going into Denver looks pretty sweet.

Denver Donkeys - Luck be a dumb blonde tonight. Somehow, despite a wretched performance by the Donkey offense, Drew Brees managed to gift wrap this game
for them.

East Bay Convicts - This is a team that defines wasted talent. They are
sloppy, undisciplined and cannot play as a team. Randy Moss is more a
distraction than a playmaker.

San Diego Bolts - Rough day for Drew and the boyz. They owned this one and coughed it up at the last minute. Marty just can't seem to win in the thin air, no matter which logo is on his hat.

Throw Him A Bone Award -
The game-bone has to go to Trent Green. His super-cool, methodical and
deadly accurate operation of this offense simply wore down the heavy and
plodding Oakland D. Even without his security blanket, Willie Roaf, Trent
got it done.

The Doggity Dog -
This week's recipient of the coveted paper upside the muzzle goes to "former pro-bowler" Jerome Woods. His special teams performance looks like a guy who lost his starting job and now he's sulking and going through the motions - oh, wait, he is! His slopping blocking cost Dante a score and his poor coverage skills makes me wonder why he isn't in streets rather than Bo.

Ms. Priscilla's Recipe Box's "Tailgate Recipe of the Week" -
A fan-favorite segment from the past two years is the tailgate recipe of the week - a feature suggested by Dr. Bob's better half before the start of the 2003 season. In her honor, it will bear her name this season.

Blowfish Cajun Chili Dogs. A little send up for our good friends in the gulf
states... MMMM....good. Since the Chiefs are on the road this week, you can make this at home:

Blowfish likes All Beef Ballpark franks, but Hebrew Nationals are good too.
Boil a pot of water, when it gets to a rolling boil, shut off the heat, put
the dogs in, cover the pot, let 'em steam. They'll be plump and perfect when it comes time to "bun" them.

The Chili:
1 lb coarse ground lean beef (or ground turkey).
Brown the meat with 2 tablespoons of worsheshire sauce.
When brown, drain grease.
Fold in the following:
1 bottle (6 or 8 oz) Chili Sauce
2 tablespoons of mustard
1 packet chili powder (Williams or whatever's on sale) add water, only use
1/3 of the water recommended on the packet.
1 tablespoon of either Old Bay or Gates & Sons BBQ seasoned salt

The secret ingredient...

4 heaping tablespoons of Jack Miller's Cajun BBQ Sauce.
This stuff is not BBQ sauce. It's something else, trust me. Sucks on BBQ, GREAT in chili. Buy it here: http://www.jackmillers.com/

If you can't get this, use a teaspoon of Tabasco or Louisiana Hot Sauce.

Turn heat down, let this simmer for about 10 minutes.

Bun the dog, smother with chili. Then top with shredded sharp cheddar and chopped Vidalia Onion. Wash down with Red Creme Soda.

Who Dat Make Dem Chilidogs?

Excellent Tip: take a Tagamet or a Pepsid about a half an hour before you
eat this, and DON'T eat it right before bedtime. It'll hurt you real bad.
Otherwise, yum yum yum.

Send your recipes to the Dog, by e-mail or fax them to 913-831-1307.

Special Note:
This season, the Doggity Report would like to focus on the good work done by our friend Phil Kloster and all the folks at the "37 Forever" Foundation. 37 Forever was founded in 1999 to honor the memory of Joe Delaney, a former Chiefs RB who perished in a drowning accident after entering the water in an effort to save three children. Only one child survived and Joe Delaney could not swim. Joe Delaney was inducted into the Chiefs Ring of Fame in 2004, perhaps in part due to the exposure brought about by the efforts of 37 Forever.

The 5th Annual 37 Forever Banquet will be held Friday, October 14th from 7PM to 11 PM at the Pony Express Brewing Company in Olathe. There will be a live band, dinner, and beer provided. Chiefs affiliated celebrities have been invited and we're certain to have a great time. All proceeds put
local, at risk youth through our swim and water safety program.

37 Forever is currently seeking local leadership to assist in growing the
organization. For more information about 37 Forever or to purchase tickets to the Banquet, please contact Phil Kloster at (816)665-1208 or

Next week -
Monday Night Football from the Thin Air when the 2-0 Chiefs take on the 1-1 Donkeys.

Your faithful scribe,
Mr. Doggity

09-26-2005, 09:46 AM
The Doggity Dog -
This week's recipient of the coveted paper upside the muzzle goes to "former pro-bowler" Jerome Woods. His special teams performance looks like a guy who lost his starting job and now he's sulking and going through the motions - oh, wait, he is! His slopping blocking cost Dante a score and his poor coverage skills makes me wonder why he isn't in streets rather than Bo.

Abso-freakin-lutly. Pay attention to last week's game and this nails it. He DOES look like he's going through the motions. Dress Bo.