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View Full Version : What would the world be like if farts emitted an appropriately colored gas cloud?


John_Wayne
11-03-2005, 10:52 AM
You couldn't claim that the dog did it any longer.
You couldn't silent fart in an elevator any longer.

Rain Man
11-03-2005, 11:11 AM
I bet that our eyes would have evolved to see in infrared.

listopencil
11-03-2005, 12:03 PM
Mine do. Don't yours?

Saulbadguy
11-03-2005, 12:03 PM
Mustard gas.

Rain Man
11-03-2005, 12:05 PM
They'd have to make computer screens much brighter.

BagoobaChief
11-03-2005, 02:37 PM
This guy would have been taken more seriously....

Pueblo, Colorado (Denver Post):

An inventor from Colorado has created the world's first fart-proof underwear.

Buck Weimer says his airtight knickers have a replaceable charcoal filter to remove bad gas before it escapes. The undies, called Under-Ease, are on sale over the internet.

Buck, from Pueblo, said he thought up his invention after his wife 'let go a bomb' in bed one night. Buck, 62, and Arlene, 57, suffer from Crohn's disease, an inflammatory bowel syndrome.

In both men and women's styles, the underwear, made from a soft, airtight, nylon-type fabric, is designed for people with chronic flatulence. Elastic is sewn around the waist and both legs.

The removable filter - which looks similar to the shoulder pads placed in women's clothing - is made of charcoal sandwiched between two layers of Australian sheep's wool.

Buck says the charcoal filter isn't too bulky but could capture the bad-smelling gas and allow the non-smelling gas - hydrogen and oxygen - to pass through.

It was developed from gas masks worn by coal miners, reports the Denver Post.

They come as boxer shorts for men and panties for women and sell for $24.95 (18). Replacement filters cost about 7. They are sold with the motto: "Wear them for the ones you love."

The Weimars say flatulence is still a touchy subject for most people. Almost every sale has come via their site.

Katipan
11-03-2005, 02:40 PM
I would like mine to be pink

Rain Man
11-03-2005, 02:41 PM
I would like mine to be pink


...at first.

John_Wayne
11-03-2005, 02:46 PM
Do you think colored fart gas could cause WWIII or bring world peace? I think the potential is there.

Amnorix
11-03-2005, 02:49 PM
This guy would have been taken more seriously....

Pueblo, Colorado (Denver Post):

An inventor from Colorado has created the world's first fart-proof underwear.

Buck Weimer says his airtight knickers have a replaceable charcoal filter to remove bad gas before it escapes. The undies, called Under-Ease, are on sale over the internet.

Buck, from Pueblo, said he thought up his invention after his wife 'let go a bomb' in bed one night. Buck, 62, and Arlene, 57, suffer from Crohn's disease, an inflammatory bowel syndrome.

In both men and women's styles, the underwear, made from a soft, airtight, nylon-type fabric, is designed for people with chronic flatulence. Elastic is sewn around the waist and both legs.

The removable filter - which looks similar to the shoulder pads placed in women's clothing - is made of charcoal sandwiched between two layers of Australian sheep's wool.

Buck says the charcoal filter isn't too bulky but could capture the bad-smelling gas and allow the non-smelling gas - hydrogen and oxygen - to pass through.

It was developed from gas masks worn by coal miners, reports the Denver Post.

They come as boxer shorts for men and panties for women and sell for $24.95 (18). Replacement filters cost about 7. They are sold with the motto: "Wear them for the ones you love."

The Weimars say flatulence is still a touchy subject for most people. Almost every sale has come via their site.


Donger ought to hand these out as gifts to people he has business lunches with...

Reaper16
11-03-2005, 03:14 PM
Donger ought to hand these out as gifts to people he has business lunches with...
ROFL ROFL

Iowanian
11-03-2005, 03:26 PM
My office is a hue of an entire rainbow of fruit flavors right now.

I know what Charlie must have seen when he walked into Wonkaville.

pooopa lumpa doopadee doo.....

Biohazard
11-03-2005, 03:26 PM
Buck says the charcoal filter isn't too bulky
Yeah that would make for an interesting conversation, uuuummm honey did you forget where the bathroom was again?

John_Wayne
11-03-2005, 06:12 PM
Pffffffffffffffffffttttt! :fart:

whoops


sorry

Rain Man
11-03-2005, 06:16 PM
Pffffffffffffffffffttttt! :fart:

whoops


sorry


http://www.yikes.com/pat/eric/green_cloud_swirl.jpg

mikey23545
11-03-2005, 06:16 PM
My office is a hue of an entire rainbow of fruit flavors right now.

I know what Charlie must have seen when he walked into Wonkaville.

pooopa lumpa doopadee doo.....


It's bad news if you're getting lumpas...

PastorMikH
11-03-2005, 08:04 PM
Interestingly enough, when I was on the fire dept up in Kansas we got a thermal imager which shows temperature changes on a view screen. Yes, we did, one night we were playing around with the camera and a guy passed gas walking away from us and you could visably see the cloud on the camera.

Phobia
11-03-2005, 08:07 PM
I would like mine to be pink

I'll speak to her about that option. FWIW, I'm in favor.

Lonewolf Ed
11-03-2005, 08:15 PM
You couldn't claim that the dog did it any longer.
You couldn't silent fart in an elevator any longer.

I am making a German dinner soon, consisting of pork chops with about eight different spices including paprika, thyme, mustard seed, and black pepper which are cooked with carrots, onions, and garlic, then transferred to a Dutch oven with German oktoberfest beer, sauerkraut, more spices, ham hock, and polska kielbasa. It is served the next day, reheated. I wonder what colors that would make. :hmmm:

Iowanian
11-03-2005, 08:15 PM
Either My farts look marvelous, Or I'm a stoner in a technicolor dreamcoat*



*whatever the fug that is.

John_Wayne
11-03-2005, 09:22 PM
I am making a German dinner soon, consisting of pork chops with about eight different spices including paprika, thyme, mustard seed, and black pepper which are cooked with carrots, onions, and garlic, then transferred to a Dutch oven with German oktoberfest beer, sauerkraut, more spices, ham hock, and polska kielbasa. It is served the next day, reheated. I wonder what colors that would make. :hmmm: :eek:

Douche Baggins
11-03-2005, 09:25 PM
I pulled the covers over my head and had a nice ass-bake last night.

onescrewleftuntwisted
11-04-2005, 02:31 AM
I pulled the covers over my head and had a nice ass-bake last night.


ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL

John_Wayne
11-04-2005, 07:30 AM
I pulled the covers over my head and had a nice ass-bake last night. :Lin: Raiduhs :Robinson: :whackit:

Saulbadguy
11-04-2005, 07:39 AM
I pulled the covers over my head and had a nice ass-bake last night.
It's called a dutch oven.

Douche Baggins
11-04-2005, 07:40 AM
It's called a dutch oven.

Is that what that's called? Good to know.

Dutch ovens rule!

onescrewleftuntwisted
11-04-2005, 07:44 AM
it just got realy wrong in here

Douche Baggins
11-04-2005, 07:46 AM
Don't lie. There isn't a person on this earth who doesn't enjoy the smell of their own farts.