Christmas Presents thread

[ENDelt260]

.

[KCFalcon59]

Jesus says you need to dust.

[Saulbadguy]

That's pretty cool, but not as cool as Buddy Christ.

http://www.graphittidesigns.com/shop/files/images_backup/t_82171.jpg

[Saulbadguy]

Tivo with IR blaster over a digital cable box..haha...old school.

[ChiefsfaninPA]

I hope Jesus doesn't have allergies.

[Saulbadguy]

I hope Jesus doesn't have allergies.
How could he? He's JESUS! LOL!

[Bwana]

WTH is that to the left of Jesus, a crack pipe / TV remote all in one combo? :hmmm:

[MOhillbilly]

Jesus says you need to dust.

hes smokin something....

[RedDread]

Jesus says you need to dust.

You win this thread.

[Hammock Parties]

This is going to make it difficult for ENDelt to jerk off to Cinemax without feeling guilty.

[Katipan]

This is going to make it difficult for ENDelt to jerk off to Cinemax without feeling guilty.

I doubt it

[PastorMikH]

Jesus says you need to dust.



No, Jesus is saying that END needs to have Mer come over and dust for him.

[Baby Lee]

This is going to make it difficult for ENDelt to jerk off to Cinemax without feeling guilty.
Naw, it'll just give him something to aim his 'ending' at.

[Saulbadguy]

Naw, it'll just give him something to aim his 'ending' at.
ROFL

Get low, get low, get low get low get low!

[Katipan]

No, Jesus is saying that END needs to have Mer come over and dust for him.

Don't put those dirty ideas in his head.

[johnson&surtain]

Do any of you think that the chiefs will get a win over the giants

[Mr. Kotter]

You shoud probably rename the thread, the "Holiday Present Thead"....to avoid potentially offending non-Christians.

[alanm]

It's a wireless ethernet adapter. It's how my Tivo is on my network.
You're going to start a fire and melt Jesus. And then you're going to hell. ROFL

[SPchief]

ROFL

[alanm]

Yeah, THAT's why I'm going to hell.
The other stuff you can debate with St. Peter at the pearly gates. But melting a bobblehead Jesus ain't one of them. :)

[Hammock Parties]

Yeah, THAT's why I'm going to hell.

It's the straw that broke the camel's back.

[ChiefsFire]

Yeah, THAT's why I'm going to hell.
I thougt it had something to do with you,a bottle of bacardi 151,and a handful of blind midgets...

[ChiefsFire]

Hey, those midgets were consenting adults, all right?
yea but i dont think the bottle consented....

[ChiefsFire]

The bottle's what convinced all of us to consent.
yea but bottles arent made to be used like that...

[Katipan]

So this is what sexual banter between 2 men looks like.

[ChiefsFire]

So this is what sexual banter between 2 men looks like.
yea

its ur dream come true,TWO men talking about sex

[ChiefsFire]

ChiefsFire is a man?!?!?
uhhhhh lemme check..

[ChiefsFire]

uhhhhh lemme check..
yep

[milkman]

So this is what sexual banter between 2 men looks like.

Make it stop! :eek:

[ChiefsFire]

You sure?
if ya wanna see my junk dude,just ask...

[Katipan]

Make it stop! :eek:

I'll draw Endelt's attention. You get ChiefsFire.

[Mr. Kotter]

I'll draw Endelt's attention. You get ChiefsFire.

Next time he's drunk with you, I suspect he'll want to show you the Bobblehead Jesus in his jeans.

[Katipan]

And just how are you going to do that?

short skirts and beer

[Katipan]

Next time he's drunk with you, I suspect he'll want to show you the Bobblehead Jesus in his jeans.

I'll be too busy dusting.
I always do what my pastor tells me to do.

[ChiefsFire]

short skirts and beer
you saying Delt wears shortskirts when he drinks beer?

[Mr. Kotter]

There's a very large deterrant to that sort of behavior.

Eh, buy him some really good stiff Scotch.....and play quarters with him, while you are chuggin' those beer shots.

[Mr. Kotter]

I'll be too busy dusting.
I always do what my pastor tells me to do.

Pastor? That's what the call the bouncers at those joints these days? :hmmm:

[Katipan]

you saying Delt wears shortskirts when he drinks beer?

my powers of persuasion are frightening

[ChiefsFire]

Pastor? That's what the call the bouncers at those joints these days? :hmmm:
id go to that church

hey Mer,what time is "service" christmas eve??

[Mr. Kotter]

id go to that church

hey Mer,what time is "service" christmas eve??

I wonder if they do the midnight service thing with candles while singing Silent Night..... :hmmm:

[Katipan]

I wonder if they do the midnight service thing with candles while singing Silent Night..... :hmmm:

you really picture me being the silent type?

[ChiefsFire]

I wonder if they do the midnight service thing with candles while singing Silent Night..... :hmmm:
wonder how the collection plate works...dollar bills only??

[Mr. Kotter]

you really picture me being the silent type?

Hell, no. I said singing the song....heh.

[4th and Long]

I thougt it had something to do with you,a bottle of bacardi 151,and a handful of blind midgets...
Hey, ... Delt can't help it if he gets more ass that a toilet seat. Dont be jealous.

[ChiefsFire]

unfortunately, now you can't get any closer than 4ft from the choir girls.

F*ck you, city of Scottsdale.
4 ft?????

holy chit

whats the point?

[ChiefsFire]

Hey, ... Delt can't help it if he gets more ass that a toilet seat. Dont be jealous.
ohhhhhhhhh

4th still has some sandpaper caught in his asscrack


still funny

[Katipan]

wonder how the collection plate works...dollar bills only??

It's certainly more complicated than offering to flop your banana at heterosexual men on the internet.

[Mr. Kotter]

unfortunately, now you can't get any closer than 4ft from the choir girls.

F*ck you, city of Scottsdale.

Four feet. Damn...that's Nazi-like. You'd think 8 inches ought to be about right.

[ChiefsFire]

Bout an inch shorter than it was before.
hahaha


oh wait....owwwww

[4th and Long]

Bout an inch shorter than it was before.
Is there a market for a guy to get a job, running around with a ruler, checking distances between perky nipples and the customers?

[Katipan]

Is there a market for a guy to get a job, running around with a ruler, checking distances between perky nipples and the customers?

There's a whole special division of government.

[4th and Long]

There's a whole special division of government.
I'm in the wrong Goddamn line of work. I spend all day helping to ensure quality of life when instead I could be eyeball to nipple with strippers. This sucks.

[4th and Long]

You can have that job, 4th... but you also have to go into all the Tempe bars and pluck cigarettes out of rowdy drunks' mouths.
Will they let me smoke on the job?

[ChiefsFire]

I'm in the wrong Goddamn line of work. I spend all day helping to ensure quality of life when instead I could be eyeball to nipple with strippers. This sucks.
i hear the boob job doesnt offer insurance,screw it

[4th and Long]

i hear the boob job doesnt offer insurance,screw it
Well shit ... :cuss:

[Katipan]

I'm in the wrong Goddamn line of work. I spend all day helping to ensure quality of life when instead I could be eyeball to nipple with strippers. This sucks.

You also have to get private shows as part of your job.

[4th and Long]

You never get sick when you have a job you love going to.
The man makes a valid point. Plus, if they let you drink on the job, with enough alcohol, you can kill just about any disease that may come your way ... well ... except liver disease of course.

[ChiefsFire]

wow

we have totally trashed your Christmas Presents Thread

boobs always make a good present i think

[Katipan]

And massages?

hmmm. I dunno.

Why babe? Feeling battered and bruised?

[Katipan]

The man makes a valid point. Plus, if they let you drink on the job, with enough alcohol, you can kill just about any disease that may come your way ... well ... except liver disease of course.

I bet you'd eat the buffet food too.

[4th and Long]

You also have to get private shows as part of your job.
The perks keep rolling in. :hmmm:

I half tempted to go put together some Photoshopped badge or official ID card for this job. Course I can see Delt getting hammered, printing the thing out, laminating it, putting it in his wallet and showing up at a strip club with a ruler to check distances in his new official capacity.

[Katipan]

The perks keep rolling in. :hmmm:

I half tempted to go put together some Photoshopped badge or official ID card for this job. Course I can see Delt getting hammered, printing the thing out, laminating it, putting it in his wallet and showing up at a strip club with a ruler to check distances in his new official capacity.

...

yeah. and he likes fat chicks too.

[4th and Long]

I bet you'd eat the buffet food too.
:shake:

[4th and Long]

...

yeah. and he likes fat chicks too.
Be that as it may, as I said earlier, he still gets more ass than a toilet seat.

[Katipan]

Yeah.... I'm real sore right.... there.

Whoa.... the more you rub it, the stiffer it gets.

That's a unique gift I share with 10,000,000 other women and 2 or 3 men.

[Katipan]

Be that as it may, as I said earlier, he still gets more ass than a toilet seat.

Geez, End. You get an offer of dick pictures from one man, and brown nosing from another.

You pull more internet ass than anyone I've ever met.

[4th and Long]

Is your monthly bill for being my PR rep due?
I really need to stop drinking now.

[milkman]

I'll draw Endelt's attention. You get ChiefsFire.

I'll pass.
ChiefsFire isn't my type.

[Mr. Kotter]

JennyGump ain't got shit on me.

Her tits are perkier. They have to be.

[Mr. Kotter]

Mine are hairier.

You say that like that's a plus.

[Mr. Kotter]

Some girls think so.

Really? Send a couple to SD.

[Katipan]

I only really have any say with one and she's not going anywhere.

Hogtied in your closet, huh baby?

[ChiefsFire]

I'll pass.
ChiefsFire isn't my type.
im everbodys type motherF****

[ChiefsFire]

Some girls think so.


girls with penises

[Brando]

Speaking of Christmas presents Brian...are you coming up to steal mine again this year?

[Inspector]

I'll be too busy dusting.
I always do what my pastor tells me to do.

Wish I were your pastor.

[Katipan]

Wish I were your pastor.

I know damn well what a communion wafer looks like, and I won't be tricked into getting on my knees and sticking out my tongue for just any old thing again.

[milkman]

I know damn well what a communion wafer looks like, and I won't be tricked into getting on my knees and sticking out my tongue for just any old thing again.

I sure as hell hope "any old thing" isn't a Skip reference.

[PastorMikH]

So END, did she come over and dust for you today?

[Katipan]

Place is still a mess. I think it's time to put an old Iowanian saying into practice.... "Spare the rod..."

I never did like that guy.

[Katipan]

You don't want to get the rod, huh?

Which one of us is spoiled?

[Saulbadguy]

Present #2.... everyone in the company got one of these...

.
Are those pears really that good?

[Saulbadguy]

They didn't even take the price tag off.

[Boozer]

348

Wonder if it has the 1980s Chiefs game against the Jets with the dozen or so laterals on the KO return to end the game?

[Saulbadguy]

Channukah Harry was good to me this year.

http://www.thegrillstoreandmore.com/image/products/big-pics/7595.jpg
http://timstvshowcase.com/jayandsilentbobdvd.jpg
http://www.variety.com/graphics/photos/storypics/disc_airplane.jpg

[Saulbadguy]

I haven't watched it yet...sounds like it could be entertaining.

[Saulbadguy]

What is it? Do they watch episodes of Degrassi Jr High and make fun of it MST3K style?
There is a "Degrassi: The Next Generation" show that is on now. It features some of the old Degrassi Jr High kids, but now they are grown up, and are teachers at Degrassi high. We were forced to watch Degrassi Jr high in middle school, but i havent seen any of the new episodes.

This DVD has 4 episodes of Degrassi: Next Generation that feature Jay and Silent Bob in them. My best analogy would be: Think of an episode of Beverly Hills 90210 with J & SB in it.

[Saulbadguy]

I think so.

Heh. The Airplane "Don't call me shirley edition" comes with a mail in offer for "Otto the Auto-pilot". You know that, inflateable auto-pilot thing from the movie. I want to get it and put it on my chair when im away from my desk at work. That would piss my boss off.

[Saulbadguy]

By the way...http://www.clerks2.com/

[Nzoner]

Although I got it from a buddy for my birthday(the 26th) I had to show this guy.He sings parts of ZZ Top's LaGrange and even does the "haw haw haw"

http://www.gemmy.com/products/largeImage/21262.jpg