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View Full Version : ScreenIt.com: Talk about knowing your enemy


NewChief
01-20-2006, 01:02 PM
If you didn't know, screenit.com is a website where concerned parents can see the content of movies, which I think is an awesome idea. What is really weird is just how graphic and descriptive the screenit people get when they're talking about what the movie contains. Here's a sampling from Brokeback Mountain (this should also give all of you whose wives and girlfriends are trying to drag you to see it ammunition for not going):
http://www.screenit.com/movies/2005/brokeback_mountain.html#sn
We see Ennis shirtless.

With Jack in the foreground of the shot, we see Ennis out of focus in the background. We can tell he's nude as he's crouched down washing himself (including his crotch that's facing away from the camera), but beyond seeing his out-of-focus, bare butt, we don't see anything else.

Ennis tells Jack, "You may be a sinner, but I haven't had the opportunity" (presumably meaning he's a virgin).

After a night of drinking, Ennis decides to sleep outside, but after his fire dies down, he's freezing and Jack tells him to join him in the warmer tent. As they lie side by side, Jack pulls Ennis' arm around him and then tries to kiss him several times, but Ennis is slightly resistant (pushing him away, but obviously interested). Jack's pants are then undone and he turns with his rear toward Ennis who pulls down Jack's pants (we briefly see the side of his bare butt). Ennis then undoes his own pants, spits on his fingers (for lubricant) and then puts his hand down toward his crotch (we don't see the actual act). We then see him thrusting behind Jack (rear entry anal intercourse) with related sounds, but no nudity or full shots of the encounter.

We see the side of Jack's bare butt as he's squatted down, washing his clothes.

After their sexual encounter, Ennis says, "I ain't queer," with Jack quickly chiming in, "Me neither."

While Jack is shirtless, Ennis kisses and then gets on top of him in their tent and they kiss some more, but we don't see the implied sex act.

From a distance, Joe sees Ennis and Jack playfully cavorting outdoors, shirtless.

While in their car at the drive-in, Alma pulls Ennis' hand over her shoulder down to her clothed breast or belly (possibly signaling she's pregnant -- they later have kids).

After realizing Ennis and Jack are gay, Joe won't give Jack another job, using slang for what he assumes they did (something sounding like "while you stem the rose").

Ennis and Alma passionately kiss on their bed, with him groping her clothed breast. He then gets on top and passionately kisses her and then rolls her over, either for rear entry vaginal or anal intercourse (we don't see the actual contact).

At a fireworks display, some drunken men loudly talk about "p*ssy" and humping.

At a dance, Lureen realizes Jack likes him, but being slightly frustrated that he's not doing anything about it, asks him, "What are you waiting for, a cowboy mating call?"

Lureen and Jack passionately kiss and then get into the backseat of a car where they continue. She asks if she's going to fast, and he jokingly replies that fast or slow, he likes the direction she's going. She then removes her top (we see her in her bra that shows cleavage) and then removes that, allowing full views of her bare breasts as she's on top of him.

We see Jack and Ennis lying front to back in a motel bed, presumably after sex (both are shirtless).

From a long distance, we see Jack and Ennis jumping from a short cliff, completely nude, into a body of water (we see full frontal and rear nudity -- but again from a distance).

We see a couple in bed with the man on top, views of the woman's bare breasts and hear sounds of heavy breathing. The woman says she's behind in her pills (presumably birth control).

Ennis meets up with a male street prostitute and then walks off with the man, presumably for sex.

A waitress shows cleavage.

A married man comes on to Jack, saying they should go off to a cabin for a getaway.

Jack admits to having an affair with another person (he tells that to Ennis).

Jack tells Ennis that unlike him, he can't make it on "a few high altitude f*cks a year" (referring to their relationship).

Saulbadguy
01-20-2006, 01:03 PM
Hilarious.

JBucc
01-20-2006, 01:03 PM
couldn't you pick another movie?

NewChief
01-20-2006, 01:10 PM
The 40 Year Old Virgin Profanity count is also funny:

http://www.screenit.com/movies/2005/the_40_year_old_virgin.html#ib

Phrases: "F*ck you" (said as a cough), "F*cked up," "Kiss my big brown f*cking ass," "Go f*ck a goat," "F*cking ass," "F*ck it," "He's a f*cking virgin," "F*cker," "Mr. Schwinn f*cking Armstrong," "What the f*ck /are you talking about?" "F*ck that," "F*ck me in the *sshole" (nonsexual, said as an exclamation), "That's f*cked up," "Nipple f*ck" (nonsexual, said as an exclamation), "You wait for it to grow into a plant, then you f*ck the plant," "F*ck your mother," "F*cking bitch," "Are you f*cking retarded?" "Who the f*ck are you?" "Back the f*ck off," "Get the f*ck out /of my room/here," "F*ck-buddy," "She's a f*cking grandma," "I could not give a f*ck," "Britney Spears sh*t," "Holy sh*t," "And all that sh*t," "Bullsh*t," "Scares the sh*t out of me," "Shut up you f*cking jerk," "Get out of the f*cking road," "That's f*cking crazy," "That guy needs to get laid," "I'd be nailing her," "Me so horny, me love you long time" (said with a stereotypical Asian accent), "Your d*ck is my d*ck," "Betty C*cker," "Who wants penis cake?" "You're not getting in my pants acting like that," "Hood rats" (loose women), "Hos" (whores), "Harry Tw*tter" (instead of Harry Potter), "Jack Black c*ck," "Boner," "School of c*ck," "Whack off" (masturbate), "Hurtin' for a squirtin,'" "Ho fo' sho" (whore for sure), "You got a hummer from a trannie" (erection from a transvestite), "My man's gonna get it on tonight," "You're putting the p*ssy on the pedestal," "I need some poon," "Such a smart ass," "Stupid ass," "Nasty ass," "Nasty freak," "Are you gay?" "Balls" and "Nuts" (testicles), "Shut up," "Sucker," "Forty's the new twenty," "Immature little bitch," "You're the bitch," "Jerk off" (verb and noun), "Jeez," "My bad," "What the hell?" "Screw" (nonsexual), "****** up," "Pubes" (pubic hair), "It looks mantastic," "Hot ass girl," "Quit whining like a bitch," "You're a whore," "You sick son of a bitch," "You should keep your ho on a leash," "Such a bad ass," "She-devils," "You're gay for saying that," "Ass-kisser," "Losers," "Don't be a negro," "Be my ******," "Jew-fro," "Don't screw with that," "Club rat" and "That girl is a freak."

Saulbadguy
01-20-2006, 01:11 PM
ROFL

# In the bedroom, Bateman (who's running a video camera) tells Christie to take off her robe and Sabrina her dress (we then see most of her bare butt in her thong underwear). As he rattles on about singer Phil Collins and his songs, Bateman orders Sabrina to do a "sexy dance" and for Christie to get on the bed (where we see her bare breasts hanging down inside her loose-fitting lingerie). He then tells Sabrina (about Christie's rear), "Don't just stare at it, eat it." We then see various quick shots of him having sex from behind both women, their bare breasts, his full frontal nudity, and him having sex with one of them with her leg up over his shoulder (all with movement and sounds). Later, we see his bare butt when he gets out of bed and one of the women's bare butt and breasts.

# Bateman repeatedly stabs a homeless man in an alley with a knife (the insertion isn't seen) and then stomps down on the man's small dog, killing it (we see his motions and hear the dog squeal, but don't see the actual impact).
# Blood splatters all over Bateman's face as he repeatedly strikes another man with an ax (we don't see that impact).
# A woman's nose is bloody when she leaves after a night of sex with Bateman and another woman.
# We see a severed woman's head in a bag in Bateman's fridge.
# In bed with Christie and Elizabeth and having sex with the latter, Bateman emerges from under the sheets with blood all over his mouth and the sheets as well (implying he killed Elizabeth). Christie then tries to escape from the apartment and finds various dead and rather bloody bodies along the way. Bateman, who's covered in blood, tries biting her on the leg and she kicks him in the face and escapes. He then comes after her with a chainsaw and eventually drops it down a stairwell where it strikes her (we don't see the actual impact) and we then see blood spilling out onto and spreading across the floor.
# Bateman picks up a kitten and acts as if he's going to shoot it, but instead shoots a woman who scolds him for what he's doing.
# Bateman shoots at police who shoot back at him. He hits (and wounds or kills) one of them and a police car explodes.
# Bateman shoots another man dead and blood splatters out onto the wall behind the victim.
# Bateman shoots another man dead.
# We see various sketches and drawings in Bateman's appointment book that depict various violent acts.

siberian khatru
01-20-2006, 01:13 PM
I love that site, have been using it for a couple of years now when trying to decide if the kids can see a movie or not (usually whether a PG-13 is appropriate or not).

John_Wayne
01-20-2006, 01:19 PM
This website sounds funny, but it's a good info for a parent to have. In today's movies, PG, PG-13 and R don't mean what you think they mean sometimes.

NewChief
01-20-2006, 01:28 PM
I love that site, have been using it for a couple of years now when trying to decide if the kids can see a movie or not (usually whether a PG-13 is appropriate or not).

Yeah, it's an absolutely awesome site, and I think it performs a wonderful service that I will use when my kid gets old enough to start going to the movies. I just think some of their descriptions are funny.

Fish
01-20-2006, 02:19 PM
http://www.rock103.com/pages/crew/pics/brokeboro.jpg

Ultra Peanut
01-20-2006, 02:26 PM
Sounds like a less retarded CAPalert.