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blueballs
01-03-2009, 06:55 PM
suicide/Matrix

Ebolapox
01-03-2009, 07:33 PM
hmmmmm... a bit of research gleaned the following info--

matrix (according to his CP profile): grad student, lives(ed) in kirksville, referred by a friend, last activity was 3/7/2006 (was banned). had 0.34 posts/day

hamas (according to his CP profile): teacher, lives in kirksville (per other user), referred by google, joined on 1/25/2006. has 21.79 posts/day

conclusion: inconclusive. IPs apparently the same, hamas' join date is BEFORE matrix's last activity, but that doesn't mean a whole lot, as he may have seen a ban in his future. their posting styles are similar, but not overly so. it's possible that his posting style evolved, as most of our styles evolve.

Ebolapox
01-03-2009, 07:35 PM
although it's a BIT suspicious that hamas hasn't posted in this thread to clear the air. anybody met hamas at one of the CP functions? does he look like the pictures of john matrix?

Delano
01-03-2009, 07:43 PM
Did Hamas Jenkins have a different username prior to the current moniker?

Skip Towne
01-03-2009, 07:43 PM
I've made pointed barbs about a bag of dogshit to Hamas and never got a reaction. I think they are the same guy.

Ultra Peanut
01-03-2009, 07:48 PM
HAMAS MY CAHSIN

WE GO BOWLING CAHSIN?

NOT NOW, CAHSIN! I'M BUSY!

Mr. Flopnuts
01-03-2009, 07:51 PM
Phobia knows Mensa.

kstater
01-03-2009, 07:53 PM
Whats the deal with this guy? Ever picture he is holding a sack of dog shit

ROFL

Valiant
01-03-2009, 07:56 PM
While you Mongolian clusterf*cks were typing away on Chiefsplanet, I was out exercising the dog around the local cemeteries in the KC metro, scouting potential locations. That way, when all you sad sack f*cks kick the bucket, I’ll know where to dump the shit.

Hell, I may even relieve myself a bit as well.

http://zogby.blogspot.com/saddam%20urine.jpg

Death, Taxes, and John Matrix owns your soul. Now go douche your boss’s cum out of your skank bitch’s gash.

http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e128/BlackJackSavage/JohnFMatrix.jpg

Ahaha.. I almost forgot about this worthless piece of trash..

Is it Hamas??? explains a lot..

Ebolapox
01-03-2009, 07:58 PM
ROFL

I love the white-outed index finger.

Mr. Flopnuts
01-03-2009, 07:58 PM
LMAO He looks like Shane McMahon.

Mr. Flopnuts
01-03-2009, 07:58 PM
MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY!!!!!!



HERE COMES THE MONEY!

Delano
01-03-2009, 07:59 PM
ROFL

I love the white-outed index finger.

That is epic.

Thanks Clay.

Stanley Nickels
01-03-2009, 08:07 PM
Ahaha.. I almost forgot about this worthless piece of trash..

Is it Hamas??? explains a lot..

That girl's biceps are the size of her head.

Or, should I say, her head is the size of her biceps.

Either way, it's disproportionate

Ultra Peanut
01-03-2009, 08:07 PM
MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY!!!!!!



HERE COMES THE MONEY!CHING CHING, BLING BLING

PATTIN' POCKETS

Ebolapox
01-03-2009, 08:20 PM
Oh fuck!

Ari Chi3fs
01-03-2009, 08:34 PM
This is epic. Hah hah a... If Hamas is this douche, I will laugh. What an unfolding of hilarity.

DaneMcCloud
01-03-2009, 10:32 PM
There's no way Hamas is Matrix.

I just can't believe that is true.

KcMizzou
01-03-2009, 10:34 PM
There's no way Hamas is Matrix.

I just can't believe that is true.Agreed.

If so, it'd be the greatest troll rehabilitation in Chiefsplanet history. (Granted, I know there have been a few.)

Ultra Peanut
01-03-2009, 10:39 PM
There's no way Hamas is Matrix.

I just can't believe that is true.I can actually completely buy it, but the mere thought makes me want to bury my head in sympathy shame.

Bowser
01-03-2009, 10:42 PM
Eh, if it's true, I don't really care. Like KC Mizzou said, it would be one of the greatest turnarounds by a poster, ever.

Love him or hate him, Hamas today is quality entertainment, and one of the better posters around here.

Skip Towne
01-03-2009, 10:46 PM
I can actually completely buy it, but the mere thought makes me want to bury my head in sympathy shame.

Me too but he's a MUron so why is anybody surprised?

OnTheWarpath58
01-03-2009, 10:47 PM
I can actually completely buy it, but the mere thought makes me want to bury my head in sympathy shame.

This.

Mr. Flopnuts
01-03-2009, 10:50 PM
How many people from Kirksville MO are in MENSA? Seriously. I thought everyone knew Hamas was John Matrix.

Skip Towne
01-03-2009, 10:51 PM
And before he was Matrix, he was Black Jack Savage. I remember that because FAX called him Black Jack Sausage. Hilarious.

Mr. Flopnuts
01-03-2009, 10:54 PM
How many people from Kirksville MO are in MENSA? Seriously. I thought everyone knew Hamas was John Matrix.

Maybe this came off as pretentious. It wasn't my intention. I'm just shocked because I thought this was pretty common knowledge.

Bowser
01-03-2009, 11:07 PM
How many people from Kirksville MO are in MENSA? Seriously. I thought everyone knew Hamas was John Matrix.I guess I never paid enough attention to the Matrix identity to notice. I can definitely see similarities in the posting styles, though.

Maybe this came off as pretentious. It wasn't my intention. I'm just shocked because I thought this was pretty common knowledge.Why you always got to be a dick?


:p

KcMizzou
01-03-2009, 11:24 PM
Eh, if it's true, I don't really care. Like KC Mizzou said, it would be one of the greatest turnarounds by a poster, ever.

Love him or hate him, Hamas today is quality entertainment, and one of the better posters around here.This.

You may, or may not, consider him a jackass... but he's certainly not the jackass he started as...

The same is true of many posters here...

Mr. Flopnuts
01-03-2009, 11:32 PM
This.

You may, or may not, consider him a jackass... but he's certainly not the jackass he started as...

The same is true of many posters here...

I don't know a lot of posters that haven't had a meltdown thread at one time or another. Myself included. I think Hamas is an awesome poster so I just assumed it was the dirty little secret that CP swept under the rug.

stevieray
01-04-2009, 08:15 AM
It's him.

Skip Towne
01-04-2009, 08:19 AM
It's him.

Sure looks like it.

Delano
01-04-2009, 08:23 AM
This is a very good case against the permanent IP ban.

If the mods were heavy-handed like other places (orange mane), the planet lexicon would be bereft of 'kill yourself.'

Ebolapox
01-04-2009, 11:41 PM
it's interesting, hamas matrix's last activity was on 1/3/08 ~10:59 pm (IIRC)... hope this of all things hasn't chased him away. even if it IS him, it should really matter. he's made a huge turnaround, and it appears that he should have thick enough skin to get through the barrage of 'john matrix' jokes he's going to go through.

DaneMcCloud
01-04-2009, 11:42 PM
How many people from Kirksville MO are in MENSA? Seriously. I thought everyone knew Hamas was John Matrix.

Apparently, two.

I still find it hard to believe.

Mr. Flopnuts
01-04-2009, 11:43 PM
it's interesting, hamas matrix's last activity was on 1/3/08 ~10:59 pm (IIRC)... hope this of all things hasn't chased him away. even if it IS him, it should really matter. he's made a huge turnaround, and it appears that he should have thick enough skin to get through the barrage of 'john matrix' jokes he's going to go through.

Is that you in your avatar?

DaneMcCloud
01-04-2009, 11:44 PM
Is that you in your avatar?

LMAO

SPATCH
01-04-2009, 11:45 PM
Apparently, two.

I still find it hard to believe.

actually, truman state --which is located in kirksville-- has been called "the harvard of the midwest". it's a very good school.

Ebolapox
01-04-2009, 11:56 PM
Is that you in your avatar?

.

Mr. Flopnuts
01-04-2009, 11:57 PM
LMAO You should've put a cheeto over the white outed finger.

Ebolapox
01-05-2009, 12:08 AM
LMAO You should've put a cheeto over the white outed finger.

oh yeah?

Frazod
01-05-2009, 12:13 AM
actually, truman state --which is located in kirksville-- has been called "the harvard of the midwest". it's a very good school.

It's a little hard to sell that "Harvard of the Midwest" bit when you're stepping in cow shit two miles in any direction. LMAO

SPATCH
01-05-2009, 12:16 AM
It's a little hard to sell that "Harvard of the Midwest" bit when you're stepping in cow shit two miles in any direction. LMAO

not my words.... they used to send me letters when i was in high school and they quoted that shit on some of their brochures

DaneMcCloud
01-05-2009, 12:17 AM
It's a little hard to sell that "Harvard of the Midwest" bit when you're stepping in cow shit two miles in any direction. LMAO

ROFL

I'd like to know how many of those people from the "Harvard of the Midwest" are running multi-national companies.

What are the name of the schools in question?

Where the fuck is Hamas?

Frazod
01-05-2009, 12:22 AM
not my words.... they used to send me letters when i was in high school and they quoted that shit on some of their brochures

I know. I'm from Kirksville. Truman (or Northeast Missouri State University, as it used to be called) is my alma mater. Or would be, if I hadn't gone broke after a semester and went in the service.

DaneMcCloud
01-05-2009, 12:24 AM
I know. I'm from Kirksville. Truman (or Northeast Missouri State University, as it used to be called) is my alma mater. Or would be, if I hadn't gone broke after a semester and went in the service.

Would St. Louis University be considered "Harvard of the Midwest"?

I always heard (when I lived in Kansas) that it was a good school.

Frazod
01-05-2009, 12:25 AM
Would St. Louis University be considered "Harvard of the Midwest"?

I always heard (when I lived in Kansas) that it was a good school.

I have no idea.

Ebolapox
01-05-2009, 12:26 AM
Would St. Louis University be considered "Harvard of the Midwest"?

I always heard (when I lived in Kansas) that it was a good school.

it's a good school, but not harvard of the midwest. that would be washington university in st. louis. VERY good school, the prestige of an ivy league school without the endowment and pomp. SLU is good, but it's very difficult to beat wash U.

cdcox
01-05-2009, 12:35 AM
it's a good school, but not harvard of the midwest. that would be washington university in st. louis. VERY good school, the prestige of an ivy league school without the endowment and pomp. SLU is good, but it's very difficult to beat wash U.

Yep, on Washington U.

I have heard that Truman University is the Harvard of the Midwest, but I've only heard that within Missouri. That school doesn't have much reputation outside of Missouri. I suppose it is a decent liberal arts school, but most of those are known regionally, not nationally.

Phobia
01-05-2009, 12:45 AM
How many people from Kirksville MO are in MENSA? Seriously. I thought everyone knew Hamas was John Matrix.

No kidding. Why is everybody surprised.

Frazod
01-05-2009, 12:50 AM
I don't think Hamas is actually from Kirksville - he just went to school there. He's not a native "Kirkatoid" as the college students call them.

I'm really not a Kirkatoid, either. I lived there less than three years.

DaneMcCloud
01-05-2009, 12:53 AM
No kidding. Why is everybody surprised.

If true, I would have never associated that classic "poop thread" with Hamas.

Maybe I didn't pay enough attention to Matrix or Black Jack Sausage.

Frazod
01-05-2009, 12:57 AM
Well, I don't really give a shit if he was Matrix or not. Hamas is one of my favorite posters. If he was Matrix, he's learned from his earlier mistakes, and that's fine with me. There are many solid citizens here who started off as complete douchebags.

Phobia
01-05-2009, 12:57 AM
If true, I would have never associated that classic "poop thread" with Hamas.

Maybe I didn't pay enough attention to Matrix or Black Jack Sausage.

I had no choice. He's not in my fan-club whatsoever. He's used much of the same language and rantings to crap on me with both accounts so I'd recognize it anywhere.

Frazod
01-05-2009, 12:58 AM
And another thing - nothing Matrix did, EVER, was anywhere near as bad as the shit Midnight Scumbag does regularly.

Again - why has he not been banned?

Ebolapox
01-05-2009, 01:00 AM
Well, I don't really give a shit if he was Matrix or not. Hamas is one of my favorite posters. If he was Matrix, he's learned from his earlier mistakes, and that's fine with me. There are many solid citizens here who started off as complete douchebags.

This.

Phobia
01-05-2009, 01:06 AM
The "solid citizen" descriptor is being used pretty liberally but whatever.

Frazod
01-05-2009, 01:09 AM
The "solid citizen" descriptor is being used pretty liberally but whatever.

To each his own, I guess.

Phobia
01-05-2009, 01:23 AM
To each his own, I guess.

Heh. I'm getting old and prudish. His over-the-top crudeness doesn't impress me. Like you said, different strokes.

Dick Bull
01-05-2009, 01:44 AM
Heh. I'm getting old and prudish. His over-the-top crudeness doesn't impress me. Like you said, different strokes.

sounds like that fatchatter wore you to a frazzle

Skip Towne
01-05-2009, 08:23 AM
I like the new cuss words he makes up. But yes, he is crude.

Fairplay
01-05-2009, 08:52 AM
I have a hard time believing Matrix is Hamas.

Mainly because Hamas would back up his facts.

But Hama's is cool in my book. I like his in your face approach.

Ebolapox
01-05-2009, 08:53 AM
I have a hard time believing Matrix is Hamas.

Mainly because Hamas would back up his facts.

But Hama's is cool in my book. I like his in your face approach.

the fact that he hasn't posted or had any activity since 1/3/09 (about the time this really came out and spread like wildfire) is very suspect.

eazyb81
01-05-2009, 09:00 AM
actually, truman state --which is located in kirksville-- has been called "the harvard of the midwest". it's a very good school.

The only people that call Truman the "Harvard of the midwest" are Truman students.

Phobia
01-05-2009, 09:04 AM
the fact that he hasn't posted or had any activity since 1/3/09 (about the time this really came out and spread like wildfire) is very suspect.

Not really. It's the way he operates. I've called him Matrix in the past and he just ignores it.

Donger
01-05-2009, 09:16 AM
Here's an IP lookup report for John Matrix. I'll let everyone draw their own conclusions.

He likes XXX porn?

Demonpenz
01-05-2009, 09:21 AM
it's so easy /axel rose voice.

Fairplay
01-05-2009, 10:16 AM
Not really. It's the way he operates. I've called him Matrix in the past and he just ignores it.

Will the real Matrix please stand up.

Sure-Oz
01-05-2009, 10:28 AM
Damn, i really thought Hamas was a pissed off Carl Weathers!

Ultra Peanut
01-05-2009, 01:09 PM
Straight outta Chatsworth!

Chillin' on my butt cause I've only got one nut!
*gun noises*
Look out, little homie with a machine gun!
*gun noises*
Know what I'm sayin'? Know what I'm sayin'?

Short Leash Hootie
01-05-2009, 01:11 PM
I'm pretty sure they aren't the same person - I've asked Hamas point blank before and he said no. I think it's just the Kirksville thing that puts that idea in people's heads.

Shit...

If Hamas is from Kirksville, and Matrix is from Kirksville...they are the same person. Their posting style is EXACT...go look at some of the other Matrix threads...he makes the same 'intellectual' attacks that Hamas uses in all of his posts.

It's the same guy. I was wondering about Kirksville...if Hamas is from Kirksville...it's the same guy. I guarantee it.

Short Leash Hootie
01-05-2009, 01:13 PM
Maybe they just live in the same neighborhood, or something.

Or maybe they are just the same person.

Go look at some of Matrix' threads in the H.O.C.

They post the exact same way...firing 'clever' insults with intellectually charged metaphors...

Short Leash Hootie
01-05-2009, 01:15 PM
Ahaha.. I almost forgot about this worthless piece of trash..

Is it Hamas??? explains a lot..

Dude...it is.

That's EXACTLY how Hamas posts...

He uses those ridiculous metaphors to prove his points and make himself look smarter than the person he is arguing with/trying to make stupid.

I'd be $1000 that it's Hamas...and that's about the entire amount of money I have to my name.

Ultra Peanut
01-05-2009, 01:16 PM
I think your "Repost" key is stuck.

Donger
01-05-2009, 01:17 PM
Dude...it is.

That's EXACTLY how Hamas posts...

He uses those ridiculous metaphors to prove his points and make himself look smarter than the person he is arguing with/trying to make stupid.

I'd be $1000 that it's Hamas...and that's about the entire amount of money I have to my name.

Heh: "the breadth of your domain does approach that of Alexander the Great."

Doesn't Hamas have a penchant for Die Hard?

Short Leash Hootie
01-05-2009, 01:21 PM
I think your "Repost" key is stuck.

You'd think if he's MENSA...he'd be smart enough not to post the same exact way as one of the biggest trolls this site has ever seen.

Like Flopnuts said, I thought everyone pretty much assumed he was Matrix and didn't care...their posting styles are IDENTICAL.

The fact they are both listed from Kirksville...I didn't know that. Simply makes it a 100% match.

So you guys are bowing to a guy who won't even clean up his own dog's shit!

Haha...and the dude is always shitting on people with ugly significant others...that broad he's posing with is NOT cute.

Ultra Peanut
01-05-2009, 01:24 PM
Thanks for continuing to make the same obvious point over and over again.

It's better than making the same retarded point over and over again, I guess.

Short Leash Hootie
01-05-2009, 01:25 PM
Thanks for continuing to make the same obvious point over and over again.

It's better than making the same retarded point over and over again, I guess.

No problem.

Frazod
01-05-2009, 01:27 PM
You'd think if he's MENSA...he'd be smart enough not to post the same exact way as one of the biggest trolls this site has ever seen.

Like Flopnuts said, I thought everyone pretty much assumed he was Matrix and didn't care...their posting styles are IDENTICAL.

The fact they are both listed from Kirksville...I didn't know that. Simply makes it a 100% match.

So you guys are bowing to a guy who won't even clean up his own dog's shit!

Haha...and the dude is always shitting on people with ugly significant others...that broad he's posing with is NOT cute.

Even if he is the same person, he's still far less of a douchebag than you are.

Phobia
01-05-2009, 01:32 PM
I don't think it's necessary to tear Hamas down. He's obviously made an adjustment to his online persona in order to be accepted and there's nothing wrong with that.

There are probably dozens of others in that situation. The only thing I've taken umbrage with is the "model citizen" implication. But I do commend Hamas for recognizing and taking action.

I also think the reason behind Hamas and Hootie's dislike for one another is because they're so much alike. If Hootie were capable of an adjustment then they could be twinkies.

Ultra Peanut
01-05-2009, 01:36 PM
It was "solid citizen," and I would consider being a top five percenter to be solid.

Donger
01-05-2009, 01:37 PM
It was "solid citizen," and I would consider being a top five percenter to be solid.

Top five percent of what?

Mr. Flopnuts
01-05-2009, 01:41 PM
Well, I don't really give a shit if he was Matrix or not. Hamas is one of my favorite posters. If he was Matrix, he's learned from his earlier mistakes, and that's fine with me. There are many solid citizens here who started off as complete douchebags.

This.

I was one of them. Some people, like myself, had absolutely zero experience with internet chat boards when signing up here. Culture shock, and some intralessons to say the least. Hamas is solid in my book.

Short Leash Hootie
01-05-2009, 01:42 PM
I don't think it's necessary to tear Hamas down. He's obviously made an adjustment to his online persona in order to be accepted and there's nothing wrong with that.

There are probably dozens of others in that situation. The only thing I've taken umbrage with is the "model citizen" implication. But I do commend Hamas for recognizing and taking action.

I also think the reason behind Hamas and Hootie's dislike for one another is because they're so much alike. If Hootie were capable of an adjustment then they could be twinkies.

Nah...I only jab back at others who take their shots at me, first...Hamas believes he's above everyone...thus making him a douche bag.

Mr. Flopnuts
01-05-2009, 01:44 PM
I don't think it's necessary to tear Hamas down. He's obviously made an adjustment to his online persona in order to be accepted and there's nothing wrong with that.

There are probably dozens of others in that situation. The only thing I've taken umbrage with is the "model citizen" implication. But I do commend Hamas for recognizing and taking action.

I also think the reason behind Hamas and Hootie's dislike for one another is because they're so much alike. If Hootie were capable of an adjustment then they could be twinkies.

LMAO I like them both, but that's funny.

Ultra Peanut
01-05-2009, 01:47 PM
Top five percent of what?Posters.

There's a top five percent. And then the next five.

And then shit.

Donger
01-05-2009, 01:48 PM
Posters.

There's a top five percent. And then the next five.

And then shit.

Based on what? Post count?

Ultra Peanut
01-05-2009, 01:49 PM
Based on what? Post count?If you have to ask, you're in the bottom 90.

Donger
01-05-2009, 01:50 PM
If you have to ask, you're in the bottom 90.

That's nice. So, what is it based on?

Skip Towne
01-06-2009, 07:48 AM
So Hamas is still AWOL?

Baby Lee
01-06-2009, 08:17 AM
That's nice. So, what is it based on?

Obscure youtubes.

Donger
03-17-2009, 10:33 PM
So Hamas is still AWOL?

So it would seem.

Mr. Kotter
03-17-2009, 10:37 PM
I'm still shocked that I didn't figure out Matrix was....Hamas. I'm losin' my touch. LMAO

KcMizzou
03-17-2009, 10:39 PM
I'm still shocked that I didn't figure out Matrix was....Hamas. I'm losin' my touch. LMAOMeh, at this point, I don't care.

DeezNutz
03-17-2009, 10:45 PM
Would St. Louis University be considered "Harvard of the Midwest"?

I always heard (when I lived in Kansas) that it was a good school.

Wash U in St. Louis.

Now that's a top-tier academic institution.

DeezNutz
03-17-2009, 10:55 PM
This.

Dude, your new sig scares me for some reason.

I have to refocus to recognize what the hell this enormous metal something with Playstation graphics is supposed to be...

Mecca
03-17-2009, 10:57 PM
Dude, your new sig scares me for some reason.

I have to refocus to recognize what the hell this enormous metal something with Playstation graphics is supposed to be...

It's a big metal vagina.

DeezNutz
03-17-2009, 11:00 PM
It's a big metal vagina.

This sounds more promising than a putter, so I'm going with your suggestion.

OnTheWarpath58
03-18-2009, 07:46 AM
Dude, your new sig scares me for some reason.

I have to refocus to recognize what the hell this enormous metal something with Playstation graphics is supposed to be...

Yeah, I had to cut off the neck, or resize would have looked like shit.

Just picked it up a few days ago, haven't even had a chance to take it our yet.

Scotty Cameron, FTW.

DeezNutz
03-18-2009, 07:59 AM
It's a good looking piece of equipment.

You'll have to let me know how it plays.