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View Full Version : If you got sent to prison...


Rain Man
03-09-2006, 06:33 PM
All joking aside (for poll purposes, anyway - have at it in the thread), when a person goes to prison, what do you think are the odds of them becoming, you know, someone's date to the penal prom?

Mile High Mania
03-09-2006, 06:34 PM
I'd say it's damn near a given unless you're the size of Hulk Hogan with the demeanor of the Undertaker.

Claynus
03-09-2006, 06:35 PM
You just have to kick someone's ass on the first day.

Reaper16
03-09-2006, 06:36 PM
I know for me: it'd be almost inevitable, with my tragically skinny frame and gorgeous long hair. I would find whatever I could and start stabbing people. They'd respect the crazy eye, at least for awhile.

seclark
03-09-2006, 06:37 PM
You just have to kick someone's ass on the first day.
said the new b@tch on the block.
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Mile High Mania
03-09-2006, 06:37 PM
You just have to kick someone's ass on the first day.

You'd be somone's prison girl on the bus ride to the prison.

Chiefaholic
03-09-2006, 06:40 PM
You'd be somone's prison girl on the bus ride to the prison.
ROFL :clap:

Claynus
03-09-2006, 06:43 PM
You'd be somone's prison girl on the bus ride to the prison.

I'm a lover, not a fighter. :shrug:

bogie
03-09-2006, 06:44 PM
Although I do still have the ass of a 20 year old, I think I'm old enough now that maybe big bad prisoner wouldn't be interested in me. I'm sure there are many young pink boys to choose from. I hope I never have to find out.

Claynus
03-09-2006, 06:45 PM
Just stuff your ass full of razor blades.

seclark
03-09-2006, 06:48 PM
Just stuff your ass full of razor blades.
are you supposed to do this before or after you kick someone's ass?
myself, i think i'd have a hard time, fighting like that.
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Skip Towne
03-09-2006, 06:48 PM
Just stuff your ass full of razor blades.
You better hope you've lost your boyish charm.

Mile High Mania
03-09-2006, 06:49 PM
gochiefs... I believe you would have "squeal like a pig" in your future

http://www.columbia.edu/itc/tc/cstudies/imagesequence/deliverance2/deliverance_2_6.jpg


This guy would write "owned" on your lower back...
http://www.columbia.edu/itc/tc/cstudies/imagesequence/deliverance2/deliverance_2_17.jpg

Claynus
03-09-2006, 07:01 PM
This guy would write "owned" on your lower back...
http://www.columbia.edu/itc/tc/cstudies/imagesequence/deliverance2/deliverance_2_17.jpg

If I'm gonna get ****ed in the ass it is NOT gonna be by a guy like that!

Mile High Mania
03-09-2006, 07:05 PM
I'm pretty sure they're not going to offer the right of first refusal...

Mr. Laz
03-09-2006, 08:21 PM
You just have to kick someone's ass on the first day.
you dumbass ROFL

Halfcan
03-09-2006, 08:25 PM
Child molesters and rapist, the chance is 100%

Young punks-90% or greater

Bad azzes like me 0%-lol,

I have a friend in jail for murder-he has been safe, but the young kids-get passed around for cigerettes. You are someones bitch and they wil,l loan you out for smokes.

FAX
03-09-2006, 08:27 PM
It would be sad if you were only worth one swisher sweet butt.

FAX

listopencil
03-09-2006, 08:29 PM
I wonder if the show "Brokeback Mountain" in prison?

DJay23
03-09-2006, 08:30 PM
If I'm gonna get ****ed in the ass it is NOT gonna be by a guy like that!
You sound almost eager to get poked in your big brown eye.

Claynus
03-09-2006, 08:32 PM
It was a Ferris Bueller reference.

kcfanintitanhell
03-09-2006, 08:33 PM
Been there, done that. I did hard time for a grand total of three months before I got shipped off to a minimum security detail to finish off my 9 months. I just made it a point not to become friends with anyone, period. I made no eye contact, nothing. Of course I knew that I was not gonna be around for the next 10 years or so, and that made it a lot easier.
I knew of some 20-somethings that were in for a long time that took the bitch route, but I was totally out of that circle. God help them.

Halfcan
03-09-2006, 08:53 PM
You sound almost eager to get poked in your big brown eye.

There's a news flash, also we cut Warfield, Elvis is dead, and the Titanic sunk.

Halfcan
03-09-2006, 08:54 PM
It was a Ferris Bueller reference.


I love that movie, I skipped school, and saw it.

Iowanian
03-09-2006, 08:55 PM
0%


.....without taking a savage, savage beating.

58-4ever
03-09-2006, 09:04 PM
I would simply never wipe or wash my ass. Shit would constantly just run down my leg. I would be the most disturbing piece of ass in the joint.

Iowanian
03-09-2006, 09:08 PM
thats a pretty good strategy 58...

melbar
03-09-2006, 09:17 PM
I'd defianately rather :whackit: Than :moon: :hump: with a dude anyday!
I'm a big guy, but If I ever go , I'm NOT Bathing! No deodorant , I may even stop wiping. Thats gonna have to be one sick f---er! :drool: with a lot of friends!

Halfcan
03-09-2006, 09:26 PM
I'd defianately rather :whackit: Than :moon: :hump: with a dude anyday!
I'm a big guy, but If I ever go , I'm NOT Bathing! No deodorant , I may even stop wiping. Thats gonna have to be one sick f---er! :drool: with a lot of friends!

Sadly-I think they like it stinking. If a guy is going to assrape ya-I don't think he is worried about not wiping. Sick ****ers in prison-that is where you would find them.

Chiefnj
03-09-2006, 09:27 PM
Your first night in Pelican Bay they knock out your front teeth so you can't bite down.

Halfcan
03-09-2006, 09:30 PM
Your first night in Pelican Bay they knock out your front teeth so you can't bite down.

That was in that movie about the guy getting ready to go to jail.

Nightwish
03-09-2006, 09:50 PM
A friend of mine from Springfield got out of prison back in the late 90s after doing several years at Moberly and "The Walls" in Jeff City. He said that prison rape is one of the bigger myths out there. Yes, it happens, but not nearly as commonplace as the movies and media like to portray. It's not a given that if you're small, or weak, or too nice, that you're gonna end up somebody's bitch. There are enough people in there that are willing to give it up, that most of the rough customers don't go ass-hunting the way most people think they do. If you mind your own business, and keep out of others' affairs, you'll generally be alright. Of course, that was in the 90s, and he may have just gotten lucky (because he is a pretty good sized guy), but according to him, it's just not nearly as much a problem as people like to think it is.