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View Full Version : what to do about a **** at work


John_Locke
05-06-2006, 11:52 PM
we have this new **** at work who tries to stir the shit. Most of us have been there over 4 years, she has been here 6 months. She thinks she is high and mighty because she is a trust fund baby. She is in everyone's business and if she perceives something she thinks will get someone in trouble, she presses the issue. She is zeroing on one person a week and trying to cause trouble. Give me some cool ways to turn the shit back on her without spatter.

Phobia
05-06-2006, 11:53 PM
Antifreeze.

luv
05-06-2006, 11:56 PM
Slip a roofie in her coffee. Then place her in a compromising position on a urinal in the men's restroom.

jspchief
05-06-2006, 11:56 PM
Antifreeze./thread over

listopencil
05-06-2006, 11:57 PM
Just kill her and get it over with.

John_Locke
05-06-2006, 11:57 PM
Antifreeze.

naw, don't want to actually hurt her, just want her shit to backfire. She is a bitch and **** from hell. Eventually everyone will see through her shit, it is happening now, but it is slow and I want some fun

Simplex3
05-06-2006, 11:57 PM
Wow, nobody has "stab her in the face" yet?

Baconeater
05-06-2006, 11:58 PM
Call her a n00b and give her some neg rep.

luv
05-06-2006, 11:58 PM
naw, don't want to actually hurt her, just want her shit to backfire. She is a bitch and cu nt from hell. Eventually everyone will see through her shit, it is happening now, but it is slow and I want some fun
Whoa. Watch circumventing the word blocker thing. You can get banned for that.

John_Locke
05-06-2006, 11:59 PM
Whoa. Watch circumventing the word blocker thing. You can get banned for that.


sorry, I will try to fix it. I didn't know

Halfcan
05-06-2006, 11:59 PM
Put a dead pig in her attic.

jspchief
05-07-2006, 12:00 AM
Whoa. Watch circumventing the word blocker thing. You can get banned for that. http://www.enexgee.net/pics/gif/uckf.gif

listopencil
05-07-2006, 12:01 AM
sorry, I will try to fix it. I didn't know




I've found that the best thing to do is just type in whatever you are going to type and let the filters edit you. Everyone knows what you mean and you don't go over the line.

tk13
05-07-2006, 12:02 AM
Weigh her telephone down gradually by putting nickels inside her handset each day, then one day take them all out and watch her knock herself out with the phone.

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:02 AM
Listen, here it is. You sign her work email address up for some nasty porn. Something German with poop. Everything you can find. Get that email box jammed up. If you can get on her computer and actually click some of the links all the better. Tubgirl would make a nice desktop background, don't you think?

Then just let your boss in on how she was saying all kinds of crap about wanting you to s**t all over her in the bathroom after everyone else left. Game, set, match.

John_Locke
05-07-2006, 12:11 AM
Listen, here it is. You sign her work email address up for some nasty porn. Something German with poop. Everything you can find. Get that email box jammed up. If you can get on her computer and actually click some of the links all the better. Tubgirl would make a nice desktop background, don't you think?

Then just let your boss in on how she was saying all kinds of crap about wanting you to s**t all over her in the bathroom after everyone else left. Game, set, match.


now that is kinda interesting,

but pretty elaborate. and I couldn't get on her computer.

Phobia
05-07-2006, 12:13 AM
You may wish to call Wayne Brady in on the job.

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:14 AM
now that is kinda interesting,

but pretty elaborate. and I couldn't get on her computer.
You just aren't motivated enough. Let me know when you actually care.

John_Locke
05-07-2006, 12:17 AM
You just aren't motivated enough. Let me know when you actually care.


I do care, I just can't afford to lose my job in the process.

I just don't like trouble makers

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:23 AM
I do care, I just can't afford to lose my job in the process.

I just don't like trouble makers
This is what I'm talking about. See, I don't screw around with half measures and things the victim may laugh about later. If someone isn't going to be injured then the prank isn't worth pulling off. I can get you on her computer, but you have to be serious about this.

jAZ
05-07-2006, 12:23 AM
Whoa. Watch circumventing the word blocker thing. You can get banned for that.
Since when? Has someone been banned for this? It's been going on for years. You are the first I've ever heard suggest the threat of banishment.

jspchief
05-07-2006, 12:24 AM
Since when? Has someone been banned for this? It's been going on for years. You are the first I've ever heard suggest the threat of banishment.quicksurfer got a two day vacation for it.

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:25 AM
Since when? Has someone been banned for this? It's been going on for years. You are the first I've ever heard suggest the threat of banishment.
He was specifically attacking the "c" word, however.

luv
05-07-2006, 12:26 AM
quicksurfer got a two day vacation for it.
Oh, was that all? I thought it was a week or something.

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:27 AM
Oh, was that all? I thought it was a week or something.
No, COCO got the weeker.

greg63
05-07-2006, 12:28 AM
Lock her in bathroom.

luv
05-07-2006, 12:28 AM
No, COCO got the weeker.
Ah. Well, now that I'm up to speed...

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:28 AM
Lock her in bathroom.
Gee, you're pure f**king evil.


:rolleyes:

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:29 AM
Ah. Well, now that I'm up to speed...
You're on speed? Maybe she was right about Springfield...

jAZ
05-07-2006, 12:29 AM
Interesting. Thanks for the info.

luv
05-07-2006, 12:31 AM
You're on speed? Maybe she was right about Springfield...
Not even....

Alcohol is my only drug of choice. Unless I'm sick, but then it's usually something OTC.

greg63
05-07-2006, 12:32 AM
Gee, you're pure f**king evil.


:rolleyes:

It's all I could think of. :shrug:

Phobia
05-07-2006, 12:34 AM
Since when? Has someone been banned for this? It's been going on for years. You are the first I've ever heard suggest the threat of banishment.

Ask Ali Chiefs about it.

Baconeater
05-07-2006, 12:35 AM
Oh, was that all? I thought it was a week or something.
You were correct.

http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showpost.php?p=3187750&postcount=770

ENDelt260
05-07-2006, 12:37 AM
quicksurfer got a two day vacation for it.
A week, actually.

Justin, Phil set the precedent awhile back with Ali, I believe. I think there may have even been a thread announcing it as policy.

ENDelt260
05-07-2006, 12:37 AM
No, COCO got the weeker.
You've got 'em reversed.

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:38 AM
You've got 'em reversed.
So many dumbasses, so little care...

ENDelt260
05-07-2006, 12:38 AM
So many dumbasses, so little care...
Indeed.

luv
05-07-2006, 12:41 AM
You were correct.

http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showpost.php?p=3187750&postcount=770
Wow, maybe I pay more attention than I think I do.

big nasty kcnut
05-07-2006, 12:43 AM
Here what you do go get a condom ripped it in half place condom package in her desk. email the boss she been doing it with guys and a few girls in the office and she keep the condom package as memory of her booty calls.

John_Locke
05-07-2006, 12:52 AM
Here what you do go get a condom ripped it in half place condom package in her desk. email the boss she been doing it with guys and a few girls in the office and she keep the condom package as memory of her booty calls.


now that is cool. I like that one! Also very convincing due to her "friendships" with some of the younger guys.

jAZ
05-07-2006, 12:52 AM
A week, actually.

Justin, Phil set the precedent awhile back with Ali, I believe. I think there may have even been a thread announcing it as policy.
I don't mind, I just missed all of the annoucements I guess. Anyway so one of my practices in this way is to substitute characters for letters. For example: s#it, sh!t, f*ck, bi+ch, etc. Any of that over (or pushing) the line?

milkman
05-07-2006, 12:54 AM
I don't mind, I just missed all of the annoucements I guess. Anyway so one of my practices in this way is to substitute characters for letters. For example: s#it, sh!t, f*ck, bi+ch, etc. Any of that over (or pushing) the line?

Why is any of that necessary?

If I call you a dumb****, and you don't know what I called you, then you ARE a dumb****.

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 12:54 AM
now that is cool. I like that one!
The problem is it's weak and she's going to turn that around and kick your ass with it by f**king the boss.

If you come in soft she is going to beat you down. You can't go up against a rabid dog scared, they can smell the fear a mile away. The only way to beat someone like this and not get splattered yourself is to go all out right from the start. Come in with a level of fury and a single-mindedness that they don't expect. Put that b**ch back on her heels and never let up until she's gone.

luv
05-07-2006, 12:56 AM
I don't mind, I just missed all of the annoucements I guess. Anyway so one of my practices in this way is to substitute characters for letters. For example: s#it, sh!t, f*ck, bi+ch, etc. Any of that over (or pushing) the line?
Shit and bitch are not censored.

Phobia
05-07-2006, 12:58 AM
I don't mind, I just missed all of the annoucements I guess. Anyway so one of my practices in this way is to substitute characters for letters. For example: s#it, sh!t, f*ck, bi+ch, etc. Any of that over (or pushing) the line?

Substitution has generally been accepted. Bi+ch looks like you're circumventing. But bitch and shit aren't even filtered words. The best rule of thumb is to just type what you mean and let the filters catch what has been deemed inappropriate on this site.

ChiefsKing
05-07-2006, 01:10 AM
plant drugs in her purse, then have cops come to job and arrest her. Or plant drugs in her car, then call her plates into cops. To get in her car, wait until a day when it starts to rain. Tell her you are going to roll up your windows and volunteer to roll hers up too, she will think you are being nice. Then plant drugs in her car and send that bitch to prison and out of your life for the next 5-10 years with good behavior.

Simplex3
05-07-2006, 01:13 AM
plant drugs in her purse, then have cops come to job and arrest her. Or plant drugs in her car, then call her plates into cops. To get in her car, wait until a day when it starts to rain. Tell her you are going to roll up your windows and volunteer to roll hers up too, she will think you are being nice. Then plant drugs in her car and send that bitch to prison and out of your life for the next 5-10 years with good behavior.
:clap:

Very, very nice.

I'd like to change my earlier post from poop porn to kiddie porn. Jail time is what she needs.

greg63
05-07-2006, 01:15 AM
plant drugs in her purse, then have cops come to job and arrest her. Or plant drugs in her car, then call her plates into cops. To get in her car, wait until a day when it starts to rain. Tell her you are going to roll up your windows and volunteer to roll hers up too, she will think you are being nice. Then plant drugs in her car and send that bitch to prison and out of your life for the next 5-10 years with good behavior.

ROFL :thumb:

greg63
05-07-2006, 01:24 AM
Shit and bitch are not censored.One of those two are not technically curse words even though it is widely used that way.

Bitch is as we all know a female breeding dog.

Phobia
05-07-2006, 01:27 AM
The other isn't even a word; it's an acronym: S.H.I.T. = Ship High In Transit. It's an old naval term used to convey to those loading fertilizer in the bottom of old wooden ships that had a tendency to leak over the course of a voyage to place high of the bottom.

That's the dumbest thing I've ever read. Please tell me you're kidding.

greg63
05-07-2006, 01:35 AM
That's the dumbest thing I've ever read. Please tell me you're kidding.

Well I'm sure that it is the dumbest thing you've ever read and I'm sure you feel as if I wrong; it is what I've heard as a factual matter, and perhaps I am wrong. I'm just quite certain you know for a fact that the information I have been given is erroneous since you obviously know all things.

Nite Planet.

Phobia
05-07-2006, 01:37 AM
You're not wrong, you're just naive. Stop reading emails from your stupid friends who are too stupid not to forward complete crap to you. Heck, I have a shred rule invoked on my own uncle who forwards garbage emails like that to me. If you got it via email, it's probably not factual at all. Especially if it came from a stupid friend from Kansas.

ChiefsKing
05-07-2006, 01:39 AM
:clap:

Very, very nice.

I'd like to change my earlier post from poop porn to kiddie porn. Jail time is what she needs.


Ha ha. Now that is funny!

greg63
05-07-2006, 01:43 AM
You're not wrong, you're just naive. Stop reading emails from your stupid friends who are too stupid not to forward complete crap to you. Heck, I have a shred rule invoked on my own uncle who forwards garbage emails like that to me. If you got it via email, it's probably not factual at all. Especially if it came from a stupid friend from Kansas.

ROFLROFL

…Hard to argue with that. You're right about me being naive; I have a tendency to believe things that come from sources I trust. I'm just tired right now and am taking everything entirely too personal, so I off to bed.

tk13
05-07-2006, 01:44 AM
You're not wrong, you're just naive. Stop reading emails from your stupid friends who are too stupid not to forward complete crap to you. Heck, I have a shred rule invoked on my own uncle who forwards garbage emails like that to me. If you got it via email, it's probably not factual at all. Especially if it came from a stupid friend from Kansas.
Oh. I guess I shouldn't forward you that letter the King of Nigeria sent me then. Nevermind.

Ebolapox
05-07-2006, 01:45 AM
This is what I'm talking about. See, I don't screw around with half measures and things the victim may laugh about later. If someone isn't going to be injured then the prank isn't worth pulling off. I can get you on her computer, but you have to be serious about this.

hmmm... wasn't aware maddox posted on this board...

Phobia
05-07-2006, 01:46 AM
Oh. I guess I shouldn't forward you that letter the King of Nigeria sent me then. Nevermind.

I think I have that one. I don't know why I even check email any longer. It's 99.99% garbage. Email used to be a really cool tool. Now it's garbage.

ENDelt260
05-07-2006, 01:49 AM
I think I have that one. I don't know why I even check email any longer. It's 99.99% garbage. Email used to be a really cool tool. Now it's garbage.
I love my gmail account.

Rausch
05-07-2006, 01:50 AM
we have this new **** at work who tries to stir the shit. Most of us have been there over 4 years, she has been here 6 months. She thinks she is high and mighty because she is a trust fund baby. She is in everyone's business and if she perceives something she thinks will get someone in trouble, she presses the issue. She is zeroing on one person a week and trying to cause trouble. Give me some cool ways to turn the shit back on her without spatter.

Sit back and watch her wreck herself.

It's not a matter of if, but when.








And then consider what enjoying the pain of someone else says about YOU...

jAZ
05-07-2006, 01:56 AM
Well I'm sure that it is the dumbest thing you've ever read and I'm sure you feel as if I wrong; it is what I've heard as a factual matter, and perhaps I am wrong. I'm just quite certain you know for a fact that the information I have been given is erroneous since you obviously know all things.

Nite Planet.
http://www.snopes.com/language/acronyms/shit.asp

Rausch
05-07-2006, 01:59 AM
I love my gmail account.

I'm sure it's like Cell compared to landline, but I don't want more, I want less.

I want to live in that 2 acre spot Mr. Miyagi had...

jAZ
05-07-2006, 02:00 AM
http://www.snopes.com/language/acronyms/shit.asp
Claim: The word "shit" comes from an acronym for "Ship High in Transit."

Status: False.

(snip)

The word shit entered modern English language derived from the Old English nouns scite and the Middle Low German schite, both meaning "dung," and the Old English noun scitte, meaning "diarrhea." Our most treasured cuss word has been with us a long time, showing up in written works both as a noun and as a verb as far back as the 14th century.

Scite can trace its roots back to the proto-Germanic root skit-, which brought us the German scheisse, Dutch schijten, Swedish skita, and Danish skide. Skit- comes from the Indo-European root skheid- for "split, divide, separate," thus shit is distantly related to schism and schist. (If you're wondering what a verb root for the act of separating one thing from another would have to do with excrement, it was in the sense of the body's eliminating its waste — "separating" from it, so to speak. Sort of the opposite of today's "getting one's shit together.")

Rausch
05-07-2006, 02:03 AM
Claim: The word "shit" comes from an acronym for "Ship High in Transit."

Status: False.

(snip)

The word shit entered modern English language derived from the Old English nouns scite and the Middle Low German schite, both meaning "dung," and the Old English noun scitte, meaning "diarrhea." Our most treasured cuss word has been with us a long time, showing up in written works both as a noun and as a verb as far back as the 14th century.

Scite can trace its roots back to the proto-Germanic root skit-, which brought us the German scheisse, Dutch schijten, Swedish skita, and Danish skide. Skit- comes from the Indo-European root skheid- for "split, divide, separate," thus shit is distantly related to schism and schist. (If you're wondering what a verb root for the act of separating one thing from another would have to do with excrement, it was in the sense of the body's eliminating its waste — "separating" from it, so to speak. Sort of the opposite of today's "getting one's shit together.")

And EXACTLY why you notice a difference in how the Scottish (who don't hate Krauts) and the English (who do hate Krauts) pronounce the word...

el borracho
05-07-2006, 03:53 AM
I suggest you go to work and do your job and pay no special attention the this person. :evil:

ZootedGranny
05-07-2006, 04:18 AM
Why don't you act like an adult and solve the problem by talking it out...and then halfway into the conversation kick her through a plate glass window.

Rausch
05-07-2006, 05:14 AM
Why don't you act like an adult and solve the problem by talking it out...






...and then halfway into the conversation kick her through a plate glass window.

ROFL

Braincase
05-07-2006, 06:55 AM
Tap it, then tell everybody at work that her snatch stinks.

Skip Towne
05-07-2006, 07:26 AM
I think you are all overlooking the obvious. Turn this project over to MoHillbilly. Not only does he have extensive experience in this sort of thing but he will attack the project with glee.

Bwana
05-07-2006, 08:27 AM
Let me know if it remains a problem and I will give you a tip or two that will take her mind away from work and keep her busy. :)

Phobia
05-07-2006, 08:42 AM
Let me know if it remains a problem and I will give you a tip or two that will take her mind away from work and keep her busy. :)

Like anybody is going to fall for the large foreign object in the pile of leaves gag again....

Bwana
05-07-2006, 08:45 AM
Like anybody is going to fall for the large foreign object in the pile of leaves gag again....

:evil: My idea would require a little dumpster diving, but would yield longer term results to the Mark than a trip to Bobs tranmission service.

Baby Lee
05-07-2006, 08:57 AM
Weigh her telephone down gradually by putting nickels inside her handset each day, then one day take them all out and watch her knock herself out with the phone.
Wow, more sad than funny when you read them all in a row like that.

greg63
05-07-2006, 09:38 AM
http://www.snopes.com/language/acronyms/shit.asp

Thanks for the info. I recant. :thumb:

ChiefsKing
05-07-2006, 10:56 AM
according to snopes, the word "tips" doesn't mean To Insure Prompt Service. Always thought that is what it meant. Very interesting.

Ari Chi3fs
05-07-2006, 11:17 AM
Ask Ali Chiefs about it.

Yeah Phil was Billy Bada.ss ****er.

Skip Towne
05-07-2006, 11:22 AM
Yeah Phil was Billy Bada.ss ****er.
I don't remember that. What happened?

Otter
05-07-2006, 11:31 AM
I don't remember that. What happened?

Ali Chief kept circumventing the word filter so Phil put a bowl of antifreez on his desk at work.