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View Full Version : So, the wife kicked me out of the house


booyaf2
06-09-2006, 10:59 AM
for the weekend. . . .

What should a guy do with his free time.

Predarat
06-09-2006, 11:02 AM
I say go get laid. Preferable by her best friend or sister. If not any chick you would pick up at a bar or somewhere will do. If worse comes to worse fork over 200$ for a call girl.

Rain Man
06-09-2006, 11:02 AM
Go to sea, and return to her on Sunday night with tales of great adventure and derring-do.

Predarat
06-09-2006, 11:04 AM
Oh, if she has cats dont forget to sneak inside in the middle of the night and put out a bowl of antifreeze.

ck_IN
06-09-2006, 11:05 AM
There's always a Gay Pride parade somewhere.

It might make her think twice about kicking you out again.

JBucc
06-09-2006, 11:06 AM
Have sex with her sister

Iowanian
06-09-2006, 11:06 AM
moltov cocktail.

OnTheWarpath58
06-09-2006, 11:08 AM
Have sex with her sister

Don't forget to videotape it.......

Rain Man
06-09-2006, 11:10 AM
Ride the rails, and discover the America that most of us don't see.

Donger
06-09-2006, 11:12 AM
for the weekend. . . .

What should a guy do with his free time.

That depends. What did you do that led her to such drastic measures?

BIG_DADDY
06-09-2006, 11:13 AM
Have sex with her sister ROFL

Rain Man
06-09-2006, 11:14 AM
Catch bin Laden, and then don't share the $25 million reward with her.

ck_IN
06-09-2006, 11:15 AM
Become Sims personal trainer and whip him into shape.

cookster50
06-09-2006, 11:16 AM
Do what you normally do, go over to Gaz's house and make sweet homo love to each other.

Calcountry
06-09-2006, 11:24 AM
Go to sea, and return to her on Sunday night with tales of great adventure and derring-do.I can tell, you must have read a lot as a child. ;)

BWillie
06-09-2006, 11:26 AM
Go to the Zoo, flip off the monkeys.

dtrain
06-09-2006, 11:27 AM
Finally fufill your dream of getting your nipples pierced!

KCTitus
06-09-2006, 11:28 AM
It's too bad there isnt any football on this weekend, you could make a weekend of it watching nothing but college and NFL...

JBucc
06-09-2006, 11:28 AM
Do the thing where you put a paper bag full of doodoo on the doorstep and light it on fire.

SLAG
06-09-2006, 11:28 AM
you could call phobia and make him turn your wife fat...


or you could play rock paper Sisciors

ck_IN
06-09-2006, 11:31 AM
Find a corner and become a man-whore for any woman looking for a good time.

booyaf2
06-09-2006, 11:32 AM
She don't have any sisters. So that won't work. None of her friends are doable either.

ChiefsFire
06-09-2006, 11:33 AM
go to Best Buy and make yourself at home in the home theater area and enjoy all the flat screen tvs

ck_IN
06-09-2006, 11:34 AM
Go to a Jaguar dealership and keep test driving models until they throw you out.

BWillie
06-09-2006, 11:36 AM
Do the thing where you put a paper bag full of doodoo on the doorstep and light it on fire. ROFL I was gonna say that lol.

She called the shit poop!

KCTitus
06-09-2006, 11:41 AM
Go to a Jaguar dealership and keep test driving models until they throw you out.

LOL...the local Mercedes dealer has a Maclaren SLR roped off in the showroom. They wont let you test drive it...bastards.

ChiefFan31
06-09-2006, 11:50 AM
Ever seen Harold and Khumar??

Party like NPH did :)

JimNasium
06-09-2006, 11:54 AM
Oh, if she has cats dont forget to sneak inside in the middle of the night and put out a bowl of antifreeze.
He could always just stab her in the face.

greg63
06-09-2006, 11:56 AM
So, the wife kicked me out of the house

Oh, I know; post a thread about it here on the Planet and ask us all what you should do?


....Never mind.

Rain Man
06-09-2006, 11:57 AM
Pretend you're a ghost, and scare her out of the house. But don't try it if you see a van parked out front with a bunch of young people and a brown dog.

big nasty kcnut
06-09-2006, 12:57 PM
Go to a porno shoot and be a stunt penis.

ck_IN
06-09-2006, 01:14 PM
<i>LOL...the local Mercedes dealer has a Maclaren SLR roped off in the showroom. They wont let you test drive it...bastards.</i>

Oh those wacky Germans! That's why I said Jaguar. I like their cars better anyway and the Brits are far too polite to tell you to get the F out. At least for the first 10 or so test drives.

jlscorpio
06-09-2006, 01:37 PM
go over to quiksurfer's place

DanT
06-09-2006, 01:50 PM
Pretend you're a ghost, and scare her out of the house. But don't try it if you see a van parked out front with a bunch of young people and a brown dog.


ROFL

Rain Man
06-09-2006, 01:50 PM
Write a poignant, heartbreaking book about the experience, and then take it to a New York publishing house and get a seven-figure advance and then go on Oprah to promote it, but only if it's true, and then for the rest of your life go around with money and a reputation for eloquently expressing your great sadness.

sedated
06-09-2006, 01:51 PM
rent a hotel room and throw a party for the entire ChiefsPlanet family

KCChiefsMan
06-09-2006, 01:52 PM
have kids? if not, there's nothing to worry about...just go to vegas and spend a crap ton of money on gambling, hookers and drinks and come back later next week. If you have kids....probably better think twice

Bootlegged
06-09-2006, 01:54 PM
Ever seen Harold and Khumar??

Party like NPH did :)


No way, NPH wouldn't do that.

Iowanian
06-09-2006, 02:52 PM
Go to Vegas. Send her a poloriod of your head between more plastic tittahs than a manequin warehouse.

rad
06-09-2006, 03:27 PM
Go to sea, and return to her on Sunday night, August 10, 2007 with tales of great adventure and derring-do.

Fixed your post :D

Halfcan
06-09-2006, 03:28 PM
Go to the Ballet, than spend the rest of the weekend at church.

jspchief
06-09-2006, 03:31 PM
moltov cocktail.Hey, that could be the new antifreeze. Fits right in with the "kinder, gentler" theme we've adopted.

BucEyedPea
06-09-2006, 03:32 PM
Examine your behavior and take some responsibility for it.
Then go home and apologize with some flowers. :)

rad
06-09-2006, 03:32 PM
He could always just stab her in the face.

With a soldering gun?

blueballs
06-09-2006, 03:44 PM
post your address
no reason some of
us can not hit it

Predarat
06-09-2006, 03:46 PM
key her car.

Ari Chi3fs
06-09-2006, 03:51 PM
go to a strip club with Moooo. He is quite the party animal.

Rain Man
06-09-2006, 04:24 PM
You should prowl the neighborhood naked with a wild-eyed look.

ChiefFripp
06-09-2006, 04:28 PM
Have a friend of yours with a different build than you sneak in with a hockey mask and hover over her bed with a ten inch knife. Think about how long you'll be able to have that smug smile on your face after she begs for you to come back.

Bob Dole
06-09-2006, 05:03 PM
Examine your behavior and take some responsibility for it.
Then go home and apologize with some flowers. :)

Leave it to a woman to jump to the conclusion that he did something bad to prompt this, rather than her just wanting him out of the house so she could have her MLM meetings without fear of him farting.

BucEyedPea
06-09-2006, 05:11 PM
Leave it to a woman to jump to the conclusion that he did something bad to prompt this, rather than her just wanting him out of the house so she could have her MLM meetings without fear of him farting.
:harumph: ROFL

Not necessarily something bad...just sometimes both sides do things.

Bob Dole
06-09-2006, 05:12 PM
:harumph: ROFL

Not necessarily something bad...just sometimes both sides do things.

Maybe she should be buying the flowers and apologizing.

sedated
06-09-2006, 05:17 PM
Maybe she should be buying the flowers and apologizing.


:rolleyes:

If I had a nickel for every time a woman apologized...I'd be broke



(excluding the times where she follows the apology with, "I have a headache")

BucEyedPea
06-09-2006, 05:18 PM
Maybe she should be buying the flowers and apologizing.

No, no, no. Man must make first move...then wife can own up, if needed.
Chivalry is called for here.

But buy a man flowers? :hmmm:

Bob Dole
06-09-2006, 05:24 PM
No, no, no. Man must make first move...then wife can own up, if needed.
Chivalry is called for here.

But buy a man flowers? :hmmm:

That's not chivalry. That's bullshit.

Can't a guy like flowers? How about chocolate?

BucEyedPea
06-09-2006, 05:33 PM
That's not chivalry. That's bullshit.

Is not!

Can't a guy like flowers? How about chocolate?

Yes, chocolate is gender neutral as well as an aphrodesiac!
:D

Bob Dole
06-09-2006, 05:44 PM
Is not!

Insisting that the man make the first move when the woman screwed up is most definitely bullshit.

Of course, that may be the reason Bob Dole is single...

BucEyedPea
06-09-2006, 05:47 PM
Insisting that the man make the first move when the woman screwed up is most definitely bullshit.

If the wife screwed up....but this has not been established.


Of course, that may be the reason Bob Dole is single...

If you assume the wife did it first, perhaps.

Bob Dole
06-09-2006, 05:53 PM
If you assume the wife did it first, perhaps.

That's always been the case. Bob Dole has no reason to believe it will ever be otherwise.

BucEyedPea
06-09-2006, 05:54 PM
That's always been the case. Bob Dole has no reason to believe it will ever be otherwise.

That sad! :(

Goddess Tara
06-09-2006, 09:04 PM
Ok, since I didn't see anyone else ask, why did she kick you out?

4th and Long
06-09-2006, 09:08 PM
Ok, since I didn't see anyone else ask, why did she kick you out?
Pay attention. http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showpost.php?p=3250303&postcount=10

Goddess Tara
06-09-2006, 09:14 PM
Pay attention. http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showpost.php?p=3250303&postcount=10


I never said I read thoroughly. :p

Jesus
06-09-2006, 09:47 PM
for the weekend. . . .

What should a guy do with his free time.
What any gentlemen would do. Go to the bank/store ask for some "ones" for change. And head to the closest gentlemen's club that has passed a health inspection recently. I still have dreams about Mary Magdalen. What a rack she had.

Halfcan
06-09-2006, 10:19 PM
I never said I read thoroughly. :p


With a body like yours-you don't need to read-lol

Mr. Flopnuts
06-09-2006, 10:25 PM
She don't have any sisters. So that won't work. None of her friends are doable either.


If she doesn't have doable friends then she must be pretty hot. What is it about hot chicks with fat friends? Go find some poonan. You'll be fine.

Goddess Tara
06-09-2006, 10:30 PM
With a body like yours-you don't need to read-lol


Have I told you I love you lately Half? :hail:

dtebbe
06-09-2006, 10:34 PM
Lucky bastard.

Count Zarth
06-09-2006, 10:39 PM
Go back into the house, you pussy. Declare that you are lord and master of your domain. Then proceed to watch TV in your underwear with a bag of Lays.

blueballs
06-09-2006, 11:24 PM
go live in your
mom's basement

chefsos
06-09-2006, 11:32 PM
Assuming this is the result of a fight or something, and she specified a day or time that you're allowed back into your own damn home, if I'm you I don't show up until at least 24 hours after she thinks I will. During that 24 hours I don't answer the phone, and after it's over I walk right the **** back into that place like I own it.

Pardon me, I'm a little irritated by this stuff, and I'm twice divorced. So you may want to ignore any and all advice from me.

Psyko Tek
06-09-2006, 11:39 PM
hey I got kicked outr last week
wanna be roomies????

this to will pass

Nzoner
06-10-2006, 12:13 AM
Assuming this is the result of a fight or something, and she specified a day or time that you're allowed back into your own damn home, if I'm you I don't show up until at least 24 hours after she thinks I will. During that 24 hours I don't answer the phone, and after it's over I walk right the **** back into that place like I own it.

Pardon me, I'm a little irritated by this stuff, and I'm twice divorced. So you may want to ignore any and all advice from me.

Pardon nothing,I've yet to be divorced but I agree 100%,in fact wtf is this even getting kicked out in the first place.

dtrain
06-10-2006, 12:39 AM
Post her cell # on the planet so we can prank call her forever.

J Diddy
06-10-2006, 12:41 AM
Go back into the house, you pussy. Declare that you are lord and master of your domain. Then proceed to watch TV in your underwear with a bag of Lays.

he said lay, huh huh, like he's ever had a lay

Count Zarth
06-10-2006, 12:44 AM
he said lay, huh huh, like he's ever had a lay

Does it really matter what I say? You wouldn't believe me.

J Diddy
06-10-2006, 12:45 AM
Does it really matter what I say? You wouldn't believe me.

I'm just flipping ya some shit. Calm down sparky.