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View Full Version : Secret military plans revealed!!!


noa
06-13-2006, 12:37 PM
You gotta hand it to us, we had some truly original ideas.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/4174519.stm?alt


US military pondered love not war

The unconventional proposals were made by the US Air Force

The US military investigated building a "gay bomb", which would make enemy soldiers "sexually irresistible" to each other, government papers say.

Other weapons that never saw the light of day include one to make soldiers obvious by their bad breath.

The US defense department considered various non-lethal chemicals meant to disrupt enemy discipline and morale.

The 1994 plans were for a six-year project costing $7.5m, but they were never pursued.

The US Air Force Wright Laboratory in Dayton, Ohio, sought Pentagon funding for research into what it called "harassing, annoying and 'bad guy'-identifying chemicals".

The plans were obtained under the US Freedom of Information by the Sunshine Project, a group which monitors research into chemical and biological weapons.

'Who? Me?'

The plan for a so-called "love bomb" envisaged an aphrodisiac chemical that would provoke widespread homosexual behaviour among troops, causing what the military called a "distasteful but completely non-lethal" blow to morale.

Scientists also reportedly considered a "sting me/attack me" chemical weapon to attract swarms of enraged wasps or angry rats towards enemy troops.

A substance to make the skin unbearably sensitive to sunlight was also pondered.

Another idea was to develop a chemical causing "severe and lasting halitosis", so that enemy forces would be obvious even when they tried to blend in with civilians.

In a variation on that idea, researchers pondered a "Who? Me?" bomb, which would simulate flatulence in enemy ranks.

Indeed, a "Who? Me?" device had been under consideration since 1945, the government papers say.

However, researchers concluded that the premise for such a device was fatally flawed because "people in many areas of the world do not find faecal odour offensive, since they smell it on a regular basis".

Captain Dan McSweeney of the Joint Non-Lethal Weapons Directorate at the Pentagon said the defense department receives "literally hundreds" of project ideas, but that "none of the systems described in that [1994] proposal have been developed".

He told the BBC: "It's important to point out that only those proposals which are deemed appropriate, based on stringent human effects, legal, and international treaty reviews are considered for development or acquisition."

Rain Man
06-13-2006, 01:04 PM
I really wish we would pour more resources into developing a temporary lipstick lesbian bomb.

Donger
06-13-2006, 01:12 PM
Someone in the DoD had been watching too much Python.

HC_Chief
06-13-2006, 01:15 PM
Someone in the DoD had been watching too much Python.

"ooh, I'l ssscratch yer eyes out! Y'er a fairy Mary!"

Inspector
06-13-2006, 01:16 PM
"people in many areas of the world do not find faecal odour offensive, since they smell it on a regular basis".


So that's who was hanging around my house.....

HarryParatestes
06-13-2006, 01:22 PM
I seem to recall this story from a few years ago...?


Hell....it must have already been used on the Greek Army!

DJJasonp
06-13-2006, 03:17 PM
The deadly joke warfare was so dangerous in preparation.....men could only work on one word at a time....

One man accidentally read three words and was in a coma for 3 weeks....

(I'm paraphrasing of course....but you gotta love Monty Python!)

Rain Man
06-13-2006, 03:21 PM
But seriously, if the DoD invented an involuntary lesbianism bomb, it would stop all aggression dead. Given a choice between watching two women make out and getting into a gun battle, all of the men would throw down their arms in a heartbeat.

BIG_DADDY
06-13-2006, 03:48 PM
Gay Bomb. ROFL

Brock
06-13-2006, 03:49 PM
It was tested on Denver.

crispystl420
06-13-2006, 04:35 PM
It was tested on Denver.
and obvioulsy passed with flying colors if John Elaway is any indication!

crispystl420
06-13-2006, 04:37 PM
Yeah it's obviously quite effective too if john elway is any indication of it effects.
Also I know Elway is a proper noun and should be capitilized. I just choose not to cuz he's a beotch

BIG_DADDY
06-13-2006, 04:48 PM
It was tested on Denver.

ROFL That would explain their new legislation.

Adept Havelock
06-13-2006, 05:45 PM
Check out WW 2's Bat Bomb.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bat_bomb

Cochise
06-13-2006, 05:49 PM
A substance to make the skin unbearably sensitive to sunlight was also pondered.


That one is still a damn good idea.

BigOlChiefsfan
06-13-2006, 09:21 PM
"No, General, I didn't say the Iranian Army won't leave without their wounded. I said after we drop this, the Iranian Army won't leave their buddy's behind"