"All Idiot Team" Player Groupings

[Bob Dole]

As requested, this seperate and distinct thread that is loosely associated with the other thread but needs a place of its own so as not to clutter up the other thread that deals with signings and other related decisions that don't really fit in this topic so should be relegated to the other topic that already exists elsewhere on the BB which is more appropriate for that type of discussion while this one is for addressing naming of our "player grouping."

(Just trying to ramble like an idiot...)

Bob Dole submits "Big Penguin" for the name of our one-back offensive set.

[KCTitus]

Albatross for our 2TE/I formation set.

[Mi_chief_fan]

How about "ignore the gunners" on punt returns.

[Bob Dole]

Bob Dole assumed that every Special Teams grouping would be called "Giant Brain Fart."

[Dartgod]

For our short yardage situations, I suggest we run our "If a tree falls in the forest..." package.

[Phobia]

I think Giant Brain Fart would be appropriate for a unit which features the punter/kicker as leading tackler.

[Mark M]

Okay, this info is now in three separate threads. Just want to cover all of my bases.

"Hungry Hippo" for two TE sets.

"Farting Fleas" for our 3 WR grouping.

"Kill Ken" could be a zone blitz, but we just stand there yelling out facts and stats, thus confusing the other team.

MM
~~Could do this for hours.

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One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.
--George W. Bush

[Mi_chief_fan]

How about our 5 wide set. We could call it "Elvis Dies!"

[Phobia]

Any package that "features" a pulling G should be called "Scrambling Swine".

[Bob Dole]

How about Kurt's still-in-the-design-phase 1-2-8 defensive set?

[Phobia]

Bob - how bout 0U812?

[Bob Dole]

Bob Dole was thinking more along the lines of "Big Bend" or "Good Googly Moogly."

[Mi_chief_fan]

Here's a blitz package: the one legged coyote. Drop all 4 d-linemen into coverage, 2 linebackers, and blitz the 3rd.

[Bob Dole]

But remember, the players have to be instructed to give away the blitz package well before the snap. When the QB lines up under center, the 4 linemen need to turn their backs to the line of scrimmage and run full speed in the opposite direction.

[Cannibal]

This is funny as hell.

You guys took his idea and ran with it. He must hate it.

[Baby Lee]

How about the 'Marquis de Sade' package. That's where, when the crowd noise nearly has the opposing QB losing his mind [ready to fumble the snap, throw and int, call TO, curl up like a baby], Chester 'the snap count molester' jumps offsides.
This infuses a sense of gratitude in the opposing QB [a mental mastery of sorts] that Chester will be able to exploit later in the game.

[Bob Dole]

Sadist.

[Mi_chief_fan]

How about the "Demi Moore", as in "the seventh sign." After The ball is hiked, all backs & receivers huddle in the backfield. When the huddle breaks, each person makes a block, except one. The one who doesn't stuffs the ball under his jersey, ala a pregnant Demi, and sneaks his way for a touchdown. Brilliant!

[58Forever]

Don't forget the "Elvis has never won a playoff game." package....that's where you play one QB the entire game except on the most imporant play of the game and then you bring in Marcus Spears to be QB...of course it would be a pass play...to himself...

[svuba]

The Season is not even over yet, and Bob Dole has already gone off the deep end.

Last year it took until after the draft for the majority of posters to loose what little cognitive abilities they possesed, this year you have all gone stark raving mad before the regular season games are even over, this has to be some kind of record.

IT IS GOING TO BE A LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG OFFSEASON!!

[Bob Dole]

Please excuse Bob Dole--Bob Dole has been drunk for approximately 47 days now.

[Iowanian]

how about "the three little pigs" our version of the wishbone...plays could be called "bacon right, bacon left...pork chop counter, fatback trap, etc.."

[TheFly]

Don't forget a couple of other alignments:

The Three Stooges backfield alignment. Hike the ball and watch all three argue who was supposed to get it.

The Andre Bad Check Rison alignment. Hike the ball and send the receivers out to get a car stereo in the parking lot.

The Bam Morris alignment. Make sure that white powder laid down for the chalk lines is very potent!

The Bart Simpson alignment. Butt heads. <BR>

[ct]

In honor of our favorite Packfan, who apparently got this started, I'll christin
our bread-n-butter running play The FudgePacker; run it right up Grunny's A$$!!!

ct
have i missed the cut for this team already?

[Mark M]

coryt--
We need another TE and a DT. Also, OLBs are needed.

Take your pick. I'll add you to the roster (since Bwana seems too busy with suits, teeth and strutting like a pimp on the sidelines).

MM
~~Welcomes another teammate.

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One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.
--George W. Bush

[HC_Chief]

I want to be a starting HB! Please, oh please give me 4 carries (where I tear off 60 yards) then bench me for three games!! I beg of you, please!!! http://www.chiefsplanet.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

[mlyonsd]

Did I make the cut? On the other thread I asked to be the kick returner!

I figure after about 9 or 10 months I will be able to figure out what the hell Stock is trying to tell me.

[Mark M]

HC--
I guess we can use you in our RBBC...it works so well for the Chiefs. You'll be our "Greg Hill" back.

mly--
Yes. You are our KR/PR. Just don't let the ball bounce off of your head. :D

Another play idea:

The Sweet A$$ Sneak: I'll have Cameron Diaz hike me the ball and then I'll just bump into her from behind about a dozen or so times. I guarantee we'll gain at least 8 inches.

MM
~~Getting way out of control (it's the DayQuill, I swear).


[This message has been edited by Mark M (edited 12-19-2000).]

[mlyonsd]

On defense you could call the '1st and 5' set in honor of Chester.

Have the DT walk through the line before the ball is snapped and get down into stance nose to nose with the RB.

[This message has been edited by mlyonsd (edited 12-19-2000).]

[DiscoJones]

Since I'm on D, I'd like to offer up the "Twilight Zone" coverage scheme out of the 4-3. 1 safety deep-middle, 1 safety short-middle, blitz all DL and LBs while corners go pick up on the cheerleaders.

Also have the "Tow Away Zone" and "Cover 2-women" schemes to plan....

[LD for KC]

How about the, "If you sweat you sit" backfield.

or the "penciled in granite" offensive plan.


LD for KC

[Bwana]

"Take your pick. I'll add you to the roster (since Bwana seems too busy with suits, teeth and strutting like a pimp on the sidelines)."

Hmmmm? Well if that's the way it's going to be, I'll need the hat with the feather to go with the $1900 suits. :>0 Can we work that into the budget?<P>