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View Full Version : Have you ever milked a cow?


HemiEd
11-03-2006, 10:47 PM
Just Curious how many of you have had the experience. Saw a movie the other night that had a milking instructional section. If you have not done it, you should try it sometiime.

Lets hear your milking stories.

DaFace
11-03-2006, 10:48 PM
no

Logical
11-03-2006, 10:57 PM
Why, did it turn you on?

HemiEd
11-03-2006, 11:01 PM
Why, did it turn you on?

Um, no I was 7 when my Farmer Uncle showed me how.

Easy 6
11-03-2006, 11:02 PM
Yeah, i've groped the udders of a few cows in my day ;)

Nzoner
11-03-2006, 11:05 PM
I hate farms

Bill Parcells
11-03-2006, 11:06 PM
Just Curious how many of you have had the experience. Saw a movie the other night that had a milking instructional section. If you have not done it, you should try it sometiime.

Lets hear your milking stories.
http://www.slingsnarrows.com/images/buckwheat.jpg

HemiEd
11-03-2006, 11:07 PM
Yeah, i've groped the udders of a few cows in my day ;)

I bet you are glad you have had the experience. I asked the owner of our company the same question about her kids. She said their school had a fieldtrip that had them do it. :)

Archie F. Swin
11-03-2006, 11:07 PM
milked a goat, and drank the room temp milk...not real happy about that

Nzoner
11-03-2006, 11:08 PM
Roy:Hey, I hope you don't mind, I got up a little early, so I took the liberty of milking your cow for you. Yeah, it took a little while to get her warmed up, she sure is a stubborn one, whew.
[Takes a drink from the bucket]
Mr. Boorg: We don't have a cow. We have a bull.
Roy: I'm gonna brush my teeth.

Easy 6
11-03-2006, 11:08 PM
I bet you are glad you have had the experience. I asked the owner of our company the same question about her kids. She said their school had a fieldtrip that had them do it. :)


It didnt happen on a farm to the best of my recollection :)

HemiEd
11-03-2006, 11:10 PM
Roy:Hey, I hope you don't mind, I got up a little early, so I took the liberty of milking your cow for you. Yeah, it took a little while to get her warmed up, she sure is a stubborn one, whew.
[Takes a drink from the bucket]
Mr. Boorg: We don't have a cow. We have a bull.
Roy: I'm gonna brush my teeth.

LMAO

Frazod
11-03-2006, 11:11 PM
I can distinctly remember doing it, but I can't remember where or when, other than being very young.

I also remember drinking the fresh-from-the-cow milk. Very nasty if you're accustomed to the pasteurized stuff.

Nzoner
11-03-2006, 11:13 PM
I also remember drinking the fresh-from-the-cow milk. Very nasty if you're accustomed to the pasteurized stuff.

No shit,I remember as a kid mom tried to trick me and put it in a regular milk container,one bite of my cereal and I about puked.

StcChief
11-03-2006, 11:14 PM
Farm girls yes.

HemiEd
11-03-2006, 11:14 PM
I can distinctly remember doing it, but I can't remember where or when, other than being very young.

I also remember drinking the fresh-from-the-cow milk. Very nasty if you're accustomed to the pasteurized stuff.


I lived with them for a year, we had that stuff every morning after they seperated the cream. I preferred the eggs.

Frazod
11-03-2006, 11:17 PM
The last episode of Jericho had a scene where a town native gave a bowl of cereal with straight cow milk to a city girl. She took one bite and instantly put the bowl down. Funny (and accurate) scene.

Nzoner
11-03-2006, 11:20 PM
http://tinyurl.com/y6p655

milkman
11-03-2006, 11:21 PM
I don't milk the cows.

HemiEd
11-03-2006, 11:22 PM
http://tinyurl.com/y6p655

ROFL quit it!

Bill Parcells
11-03-2006, 11:29 PM
For Ed ;)
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TinyEvel
11-03-2006, 11:47 PM
No, but I've baled hay.

(I was going to add a joke about being ready to milk a cow, thanks to the old, "European grip" but decided not to)

PastorMikH
11-04-2006, 12:16 AM
I have a time or two.

It really isn't as difficult as some people make it out to be.

PastorMikH
11-04-2006, 12:23 AM
No, but I've baled hay.

(I was going to add a joke about being ready to milk a cow, thanks to the old, "European grip" but decided not to)


I've done just about everything on cattle beside preg-checking. The vet earns his $ on that one. Done everything in the hay field except actually bale it. I've also climbed in a tractor and gone from first discing to planting and spraying anhydrous.

Not to much I haven't gotten at least a little experience on farm-wise at this point. I'd actually love to have my own farm but that is pretty tough to do if you don't inherit land.

Stewie
11-04-2006, 12:59 AM
A little milk for your coffee? NSFW

<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/9znEZkKetZc"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/9znEZkKetZc" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

el borracho
11-04-2006, 01:36 AM
Oooh! Are you trying to lure Endelt out of hiding?

Kerberos
11-04-2006, 04:55 AM
Yeah, i've groped the udders of a few cows in my day ;)




Oooh! Are you trying to lure Endelt out of hiding?


My thoughts EXACTLY el borracho. ROFL



.

Bwana
11-04-2006, 06:12 AM
Oh hell yes.

Coach
11-04-2006, 06:36 AM
I've done just about everything on cattle beside preg-checking. The vet earns his $ on that one. Done everything in the hay field except actually bale it. I've also climbed in a tractor and gone from first discing to planting and spraying anhydrous.

Not to much I haven't gotten at least a little experience on farm-wise at this point. I'd actually love to have my own farm but that is pretty tough to do if you don't inherit land.

As 15 years of working at the farm, that's about what I do as you mentioned, along with the vet doing the breeding as well.

Done everything in the hay, including baling it, as well as the tractors and harvesting.

Owning farm land and the required needs for farming is tough to do, especially consider some unscheduled events like tractor break-downs, combine break-downs, cow(s) somehow escaping the pastures, etc etc.

The good thing is when a farmer gets to the retirement age, and in the process of selling the cows, land, and the farm = good money.

HemiEd
11-04-2006, 06:59 AM
I'd actually love to have my own farm but that is pretty tough to do if you don't inherit land.


The good thing is when a farmer gets to the retirement age, and in the process of selling the cows, land, and the farm = good money.


Setting on a tractor, with no cell phone out in the booneys sounds pretty appealing on many occasion to me.

Fairplay
11-04-2006, 07:04 AM
Farm girls yes.


Heh. :clap:

oldandslow
11-04-2006, 07:36 AM
I grew up on a dairy farm. Our family milked cows every morning and evening for over 40 years. My dad did not miss a milking - 28 years straight.

Things changed a lot from the time I was little when we would milk several cows by hand, strain it through a cheesecloth looking thing into 100 lb milk cans and take them to a local milk plant every other day.

By the time Dad retired, he hooked up a cow to a milking machine that took the milk into a pipeline and then into a bulk tank. Then a tanker truck from the milk company would pick it up.

There is nothing better than raw milk straight from the cow - except in the springtime when wild onions are out. There is nothing worse than raw milk tainted with the taste of onion.

One of the saddest memories that I have was when we literally dumped 1000's of gallons of milk into a ditch for about a month. Dad was a big Granger guy (probably where I get my Union sympathies) and in the late 50's milk prices went down the tubes - seriously the farmers were getting pennies for 100 lbs, about 8 gal, - yet milk in the store kept rising in price. The Grangers got together and decided to hold out production for a month or two until the milk prices came back up. It was ugly and the milk company made all kinds of threats, but in the end it worked.

I'll stop with my stories. But yes, I have milked many cows.

Hog Rider
11-04-2006, 07:38 AM
Yeah, i've groped the udders of a few cows in my day ;)

The one with only one teat - that was no cow!

And that wasn't milk! ROFL

Fairplay
11-04-2006, 07:41 AM
Thats a good story oldandslow.

I remember reading about the milk dumping by the farmers in history class.
I thought the same thing. That must have been painful to literally dump out what you make a living off of.

Lzen
11-04-2006, 08:15 AM
I grew up in the city. But I do have relatives that live(d) in the country on farms. I remember visiting them when I was a kid and they showed me how to milk the cow. I also remember trying goat milk once and it sucked.

Chiefs_Mike_Topeka
11-04-2006, 08:29 AM
Never milked a cow;

But milked my sister's cat.

PastorMikH
11-04-2006, 09:01 AM
Setting on a tractor, with no cell phone out in the booneys sounds pretty appealing on many occasion to me.



I was on a tractor in the OK panhandle. The radio on the tractor couldn't even find a channel a lot of the time. It was AWESOME!

There are days I definetly miss that!

HemiEd
11-04-2006, 09:05 AM
I was on a tractor in the OK panhandle. The radio on the tractor couldn't even find a channel a lot of the time. It was AWESOME!

There are days I definetly miss that!

My Dad has some ground up around Oberlin, Kansas that he now leases out. This Chicago Rat Race promotes some serious regrets that I know absolutely nothing about farming at times.

HemiEd
07-20-2007, 03:41 PM
I grew up on a dairy farm. Our family milked cows every morning and evening for over 40 years. My dad did not miss a milking - 28 years straight.

Things changed a lot from the time I was little when we would milk several cows by hand, strain it through a cheesecloth looking thing into 100 lb milk cans and take them to a local milk plant every other day.

By the time Dad retired, he hooked up a cow to a milking machine that took the milk into a pipeline and then into a bulk tank. Then a tanker truck from the milk company would pick it up.

There is nothing better than raw milk straight from the cow - except in the springtime when wild onions are out. There is nothing worse than raw milk tainted with the taste of onion.

One of the saddest memories that I have was when we literally dumped 1000's of gallons of milk into a ditch for about a month. Dad was a big Granger guy (probably where I get my Union sympathies) and in the late 50's milk prices went down the tubes - seriously the farmers were getting pennies for 100 lbs, about 8 gal, - yet milk in the store kept rising in price. The Grangers got together and decided to hold out production for a month or two until the milk prices came back up. It was ugly and the milk company made all kinds of threats, but in the end it worked.

I'll stop with my stories. But yes, I have milked many cows.

Nice story, I just heard them talking about milking cows on Sirius NFL channel. LMAO

tmax63
07-20-2007, 05:21 PM
When i was a little kid (4-5) I kept an empty pop bottle in the barn and would milk my afternoon snack from old "Buttermilk". Grew up on the farm and still have it in partnership with my brother in MO and live on 40 acres in CO. Have pretty much finished the haying here in CO as I do for myself and hire out to several neighbors who don't have the equipment.

KcMizzou
07-20-2007, 05:33 PM
Never milked a cow;

But milked my sister's cat.You can milk anything with nipples.

go bowe
07-20-2007, 07:42 PM
You can milk anything with nipples.yep, that's right...

i'd like to see someone try to milk a female gorilla one time...

btw, whatever happened to the convict routine?

did you grow some hair on your head or something?

KcMizzou
07-20-2007, 07:48 PM
btw, whatever happened to the convict routine?

did you grow some hair on your head or something?Nope.. I still hear it from time to time.

It seems that shaved heads and goatees are "in" on the Planet now, though.

I kinda faded into the overweight, bald, bearded, middle-aged set.

Bob Dole
07-20-2007, 07:52 PM
Bob Dole hasn't milked one, but he's killed a few dozen with a penetrating captive bolt pistol. Does that count?

Mile High Mania
07-20-2007, 07:53 PM
Is this code for... chubby chasin'?

KcMizzou
07-20-2007, 07:58 PM
Is this code for... chubby chasin'?If so, can I change my vote?

greg63
07-20-2007, 08:15 PM
You can milk anything with nipples.

I have nipples Greg; can you milk me?

KcMizzou
07-20-2007, 08:16 PM
I have nipples Greg; can you milk me?Exactly.

LMAO

greg63
07-20-2007, 08:18 PM
Exactly.

LMAO

:D

HonestChieffan
07-20-2007, 08:40 PM
You boys need to come on down. Got about 3/4 mile of fence to build. We can manage the cell phones..no problem.

HemiEd
07-20-2007, 09:26 PM
yep, that's right...

i'd like to see someone try to milk a female gorilla one time...



I would pay to see that, with binoculars.