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View Full Version : The Old Man (Me) Vs The Sea (tree stump)


AZORChiefFan
03-03-2008, 07:09 PM
Can't use dynamite, or a big truck and chain or even anti-freeze.

In the fall of 1999 I moved into my town home. In the front 'yard' there is this orange tree. I think cool I'll have oranges. Unfortunately this orange tree would not bear fruit suitable for eating as it turned out to be an 'ornamental orange tree' or some such. So a couple times a year instead of reaping the bounty of my tree I got to pick rotting fruit up off the ground. It's thorny so even pruning was a pain in the ass. It's also on the north west side of my property so it didn't even provide me with beneficial shade of any sort.

A few years later I am dating a girl whose dad has some nice power tools. So he came over and we chopped that PoS down. Leaving a 1.5 - 2' stump.

A couple days ago I finally decided to remove this stump the best I could. Having been to various home improvement I decided on a chemical stump remover. I had ben talking about it for years and finally my current GF's dad sends me a corded drill to use. I only have a cordless drill that just doesn't have the torque and the battery would have worn out 10-15 min of use. The directions on the package calls for drilling many holes from the top and sides and then pouring the powder in the holes. Seems simple enough. I have a 1.25" drill bit (a full .25" bigger than the package suggested so that's gotta be better) Unfortunately this bit isn't made to drill
deep holes. So I go back to the Hardware store and the guy working there says I should use an auger type bit. Biggest one they have for this drill is 1" so I am back to the size suggested on the package. I come home tonight and start drilling. Seems to be going much quicker. But not quick enough.

I now realize I am going to have to cut the stump closer to the ground than it is now or I am going to be drilling holes till next spring.

OK went to Lowes and bought a pruning saw 19" of tree shredding metal teeth. Cut about 3-4 inches above the ground then proceeded to drill holes. Think I may have burned out the clutch on my GF's dads drill so I ordered a new one to replace (same brand newer model). Barely met the man and I am f'ing up his drill not to mention what I do to his daughter. Oh did I mention he hunts, has a cabin up north of Phoenix and does his own taxidermy? I am dead. Well I drilled the requisite holes and filled with the stump killer. Now I wait 4 weeks or so then it's kerosene and let it soak for a couple weeks. Then it's party time!!!!:rockon::BLVD:

Hydrae
03-03-2008, 07:13 PM
Hey, you can't just stop a story in the middle so you can watch some stupid college basketball game! :cuss: We demand entertainment. Now, not later!

Skip Towne
03-03-2008, 07:27 PM
Stumppy probably knows how.

Ari Chi3fs
03-03-2008, 07:34 PM
For all entertainment, one must go to FatChatter.com

Ari Chi3fs
03-03-2008, 07:34 PM
For all entertainment, one must go to FatChatter.com

Skip Towne
03-03-2008, 07:54 PM
For all entertainment, one must go to FatChatter.com

We heard you the first time.

Rain Man
03-03-2008, 09:10 PM
Have you tried stuffing Mentos and Diet Coke into the stump?

ClevelandBronco
03-03-2008, 09:18 PM
Just keep drilling until the stump is one big hole.

88TG88
03-03-2008, 09:20 PM
fire ?

Otter
03-03-2008, 09:22 PM
Have you tried stuffing Mentos and Diet Coke into the stump?

When I was a kid we used baking soda and vinegar...uphill both ways in 3 feet of snow.

:cuss:

AZORChiefFan
03-03-2008, 09:26 PM
Just keep drilling until the stump is one big hole.

"That's what she said" - Michael Scott

AZORChiefFan
03-03-2008, 09:27 PM
fire ?

That's the last step gonna have me a stump burnin' party.

MIAdragon
03-04-2008, 08:11 AM
This is how its done.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxk_BD80Fyg

KC Kings
03-04-2008, 08:42 AM
I had a couple of maple tree stumps that I drilled holes into and poured a bottle of root killer in there. I waited a month, poured another bottle down there, and then waited over the winter. The next spring the top was soft and I easily hacked it a few inches below ground level and covered it with dirt.

vailpass
03-04-2008, 09:10 AM
That's the last step gonna have me a stump burnin' party.

Watch out for Sheriff Joe:)
You know how they feel about fire in these parts.

Bob Dole
03-04-2008, 05:49 PM
Just drill a couple of 1/2" holes as deep as the longest bit you can find. Fill them with kerosene. Every few days, go back and fill them again. After it's absorbed about 5 gallons, drop a match in the hole and let it burn for a week or so.

Hydrae
03-04-2008, 06:07 PM
Actually, I have heard that pouring molasses on stumps works. The ants come along for the molasses and wind up destroying the stump in the process.

How you get rid of the ants later might be an issue though. :D

MIAdragon
03-04-2008, 06:24 PM
Go rent one of these.

http://www.northlandchippers.com/images/sp2000left.JPG

bogey
03-04-2008, 06:46 PM
I recommend an illegal alien.

MIAdragon
03-04-2008, 06:56 PM
I recommend an illegal alien.


well of course, to operate the machine in the post above.

AZORChiefFan
03-04-2008, 08:13 PM
I recommend an illegal alien.

Oh I tried. But I think my ball cap with I.N.S. kept them away for some reason?