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View Full Version : Funny Stuff 1968 Vs. 2008


CosmicPal
05-04-2008, 12:04 PM
I found this article in our local community paper. Thought it was interesting. It was posted in the "Funnies" section, but I found it to be a more disturbing reflection upon society rather than comedic.

1968 VS. 2008

Scenario: Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.

1968: Vice principal comes over to look at Jack’s shotgun. He goes to his own car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.

2008: School goes into immediate lock-down and the FBI is called. Jack is hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario: Jeffrey won’t be still in class, disrupts the other students.

1968: Jeffrey sent outside to sit in the hall. Later, he is allowed to return to class and does not disrupt the class again.

2008: Jeffrey is diagnosed with ADD and given massive doses of Ritalin. He becomes a zombie. School receives money from the state because Jeffery has a learning disability.

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1968: Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman and community leader.

2008: Billy’s dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is placed in foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist convinces Billy’s sister that she remembers being abused herself, and their dad ends up in prison.

Scenario: Mark has a headache and brings aspirin to school.

1968: Mark takes a couple of aspirins during lunch and headache goes away.

2008: Police called. Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario: Pedro fails English in high school.

1968: Pedro goes to summer school where he doesn’t feel so overwhelmed, passes English, and goes off to college.

2008: Pedro’s cause is taken up by the state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against the state school system and Pedro’s English teacher. English banned from the school curriculum. Pedro is given a diploma anyways but ends up mowing lawns for a living ‘cause he can’t speak English.

Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover fire-crack e r from the 4th of July. He puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and proceeds to blow up a fire ant hill.

1968: Ants decimated.

2008: Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, Homeland Security, and the FBI called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates parents; siblings are removed from the home; computers are confiscated. Johnny’s dad goes on Terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario: Bobby falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher who hugs him to comfort him.

1968: In a short time, Bobby feels better and goes on playing with the kids.

2008: Teacher is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces three years in a state prison. Bobby undergoes several years of therapy.

milkman
05-04-2008, 12:08 PM
Yep, we have become a really ****ed up society in a relatively short time.

Adept Havelock
05-04-2008, 12:13 PM
Sad but true.

Demonpenz
05-04-2008, 12:13 PM
1968: Demon isn't born yet
2008: Demon reads stupid forwards

dj56dt58
05-04-2008, 12:24 PM
I dont get it..why is Bobby still having recess 40 years later? And he's still crying over a scraped knee when he has to be over 50 years old? Pussy

CosmicPal
05-04-2008, 12:25 PM
Sad but true.

Precisely. That was my initial reaction from reading the article. And to think it was posted in the "Funnies" section of the paper.

milkman
05-04-2008, 12:26 PM
I dont get it..why is Bobby still having recess 40 years later? And he's still crying over a scraped knee when he has to be over 50 years old? Pussy

Must be Goatse's dad.

CosmicPal
05-04-2008, 12:28 PM
1968: Demon isn't born yet
2008: Demon reads stupid forwards

2008: Had Demon actually read the very first sentence of this article, he'd understand that this was taken from the local community newspaper, and not an email forward.

Rain Man
05-04-2008, 12:29 PM
1968: Led by an innovative coach, an aggressive scouting system, and anchored by an all-time great defense and pulverizing offense, the Chiefs prepare themselves for a historic Super Bowl run.

2008: Jared Allen is traded away by the Chiefs because Carl Peterson has more important things to do than negotiate with him.

Basileus777
05-04-2008, 12:30 PM
Interesting article, even if most of the examples are too exaggerated to be anything but satire.

Pablo
05-04-2008, 12:31 PM
2008: Had Demon actually read the very first sentence of this article, he'd understand that this was taken from the local community newspaper, and not an email forward.Eh...not much difference really, you'd get just about the same content from an e-mail forward as the "article" provided.

Pablo
05-04-2008, 12:33 PM
1968: Led by an innovative coach, an aggressive scouting system, and anchored by an all-time great defense and pulverizing offense, the Chiefs prepare themselves for a historic Super Bowl run.

2008: Jared Allen is traded away by the Chiefs because Carl Peterson has more important things to do than negotiate with him.

2008: CP makes the correct decision and trades JA away to a team that wants to pay him $70 million and give us great draft picks.

2010: Chiefs begin to look like a real football team again.

Rain Man
05-04-2008, 12:36 PM
1968: Hank Stram matriculates Chiefs down the field.

2008: Herm Edwards flustrates all Chiefs on the field.

Rain Man
05-04-2008, 12:38 PM
2008: CP makes the correct decision and trades JA away to a team that wants to pay him $70 million and give us great draft picks.

2010: Chiefs begin to look like a real football team again.

1968: Rain Man has no problem with GonzoRox88.

2008: Rain Man puts GonzoRox88 on his hit list.

milkman
05-04-2008, 12:39 PM
2008: CP makes the correct decision and trades JA away to a team that wants to pay him $70 million and give us great draft picks.

2010: Chiefs begin to look like a real football team again.

1974:Chiefs trade Curly Culp to Houston Oilers, because Lamar Hunt is to cheap to pay him what he's worth.

2008:Chiefs trade Jared Allen, becasue the risk is too steep for the cost.

Seems like the Cheifs actually did the right thing this time around.

Pablo
05-04-2008, 12:39 PM
1968: Rain Man has no problem with GonzoRox88.

2008: Rain Man puts GonzoRox88 on his hit list.

1968: Rain Man should have had no issue with GonzoRox88, as GonzoRox88's father was only two years old.

2008: Gonzo buys pistol for protection.

Rain Man
05-04-2008, 12:48 PM
1968: Rain Man should have had no issue with GonzoRox88, as GonzoRox88's father was only two years old.

2008: Gonzo buys pistol for protection.


1968: Rain Man feels young and strong, and the world is his oyster.

2008: Rain Man feels very old as he realizes he's talking to someone whose FATHER is younger than him.

Demonpenz
05-04-2008, 12:52 PM
did they give you stimulus checks in 1968?

cdcox
05-04-2008, 12:53 PM
I'm older than someone, who is older than someones father. Whoever can top me is going to feel really old.

Frazod
05-04-2008, 12:53 PM
1968: Frazod is younger than Rainman
2008: Frazod is STILL younger than Rainman

:evil:

milkman
05-04-2008, 12:56 PM
I'm older than someone, who is older than someones father. Whoever can top me is going to feel really old.

Ever hear of Skip?

Zebedee DuBois
05-04-2008, 01:09 PM
I just don't remember all those kids going on to college in 1968....unless they had a low number in the draft lottery.

Rain Man
05-04-2008, 01:19 PM
did they give you stimulus checks in 1968?

They tied my check to bombs and gave it to people in Hanoi!

blueballs
05-04-2008, 01:38 PM
this thread demands a 40 ouncer

Reerun_KC
05-04-2008, 01:44 PM
1968: Hank Stram matriculates Chiefs down the field.

2008: Herm Edwards flustrates all Chiefs on the field.
ROFL

Thread Closed!!!

CosmicPal
05-04-2008, 02:22 PM
1968: Chiefs motto displays a dominating figure of a Native American Indian wielding an ax and superimposed upon four states as a respectful reminder of the those who inhabited the area.

2008: The name "Chiefs" is considered racist and unethical.

Rain Man
05-04-2008, 02:45 PM
I wonder how many of these changes are because Jack, Jeffrey, Mark, Pedro, Johnny, and Bobby were 16 years old in 1968, and 56 years old in 2008. When a 56 year-old man shows up in a high school parking lot with a gun, of course the principal is going to get upset.

Skip Towne
05-04-2008, 08:20 PM
1968: Rain Man feels young and strong, and the world is his oyster.

2008: Rain Man feels very old as he realizes he's talking to someone whose FATHER is younger than him.

Get used to it.

SNR
05-04-2008, 10:35 PM
2008: Glenn Dorsey is drafted

2028: Glenn Dorsey admitted to NFL HOF with 12 Super Bowl rings, 5,000 sacks, and 12 million tackles... all with the Chiefs

Ultra Peanut
05-04-2008, 11:15 PM
Scenario: Black guy really has to go to the bathroom.

1968: http://i25.tinypic.com/9gg5dv.gif

2008: Black guy poops to his heart's content.

I miss the good ol' days. :(

POND_OF_RED
05-04-2008, 11:32 PM
2008: Glenn Dorsey is drafted

2048: Glenn Dorsey wins his 32nd Superbowl MVP award. After the game he announces his retirement at the age of 63. He thanks his love for the game and modern medicine for allowing him to enjoy the thrill of victory for so long.

FYP