PDA

View Full Version : Food and Drink A church down the street from me just opened an espresso stand


Mr. Flopnuts
05-22-2008, 09:10 AM
So I decided to go down and have a sugar free fat free vanilla latte at 135 degrees. (You people love Seattleites. Just admit it.) Anywho, I got down there and was greeted by a warm smile from a middle aged woman.

I said, "I just wanted to come down and personally welcome the newest drug dealers to the neighborhood and get my first fix."

"We're by no means drug dealers, just about everyone drinks coffee these days." The barista chuckled.

"Sure. But the bible clearly states that we should treat our bodies as temples and not indulge in anything addictive and unhealthy for our system. While I understand a level of tolerence in the Christian church, it does shock me to see you out here peddling the stuff. Sugar free non fat vanilla latte at 135 degrees please."

"............$2.50"

I was just funnin with her, but I don't think she likes me anymore. I'll have to go see her again tomorrow, the coffee was excellent.

Rain Man
05-22-2008, 09:14 AM
Ask her tomorrow if they're paying taxes since they're operating a private sector business, or whether they're immorally using their church status as a shield.

smittysbar
05-22-2008, 09:17 AM
HOLY COW

Skip Towne
05-22-2008, 09:17 AM
Ask if they are remitting the sales tax to the state.

boogblaster
05-22-2008, 09:18 AM
Ask and you'll receive ...

chasedude
05-22-2008, 09:26 AM
"In Caffeine We Trust"

Adept Havelock
05-22-2008, 09:29 AM
Ask her tomorrow if they're paying taxes since they're operating a private sector business, or whether they're immorally using their church status as a shield.

My thoughts exactly.

Maybe they can open a Bar and Grill in the evening. After all, almost everyone eats and drinks. :shrug:

I'll have the House Wine and the "Fisher of Men" mixed grill, please.

HOLY COW

Sorry, we are all out. Try the Hindu temple down the street. :p

Joie
05-22-2008, 09:31 AM
Act more and more addicted every time you go down there. Tell her you've joined support groups and are reading books but just can't help it. You NEED the stuff.

Joie
05-22-2008, 09:32 AM
My thoughts exactly.

Maybe they can open a Bar and Grill in the evening. After all, almost everyone eats and drinks. :shrug:

I'll have a Bloody Mary and the "Fisher of Men" mixed grill, please.

They could also sell cigarettes because almost everyone smokes. And condoms because almost everyone, married or not, has sex.

MTG#10
05-22-2008, 09:39 AM
Theres a coffee house/church in Springfield called "Nu Brew" or something like that. Almost the entire congregation are punk kids with blue or green hair.

Joie
05-22-2008, 09:44 AM
Theres a coffee house/church in Springfield called "Nu Brew" or something like that. Almost the entire congregation are punk kids with blue or green hair.

Is the coffee free? If so, that's why most of the congregation is present every Sunday.




If the coffee isn't free...does that count as your contribution to the collection plate?

Spicy McHaggis
05-22-2008, 09:47 AM
You should have asked for a 200 degree latte and when she handed it to you, thrown the scalding caffeinated milk in her face screaming, "HEATHENS!!! HEATHENS IN THE TEMPLE!!!"

MTG#10
05-22-2008, 09:50 AM
Is the coffee free? If so, that's why most of the congregation is present every Sunday.




If the coffee isn't free...does that count as your contribution to the collection plate?

No its not free. Its a coffee house. Its a church also. you dont have to go to the services to go buy coffee there.

Simply Red
05-22-2008, 10:11 AM
"In Caffeine We Trust"

:LOL::thumb:

Amnorix
05-22-2008, 10:15 AM
Ask her tomorrow if they're paying taxes since they're operating a private sector business, or whether they're immorally using their church status as a shield.

You would not believe how disgustingly rampant this is. It really aggravates me, and undermines support for what otherwise is a reasonably decent idea (religious organizations being tax exempt).

Joie
05-22-2008, 10:19 AM
No its not free. Its a coffee house. Its a church also. you dont have to go to the services to go buy coffee there.

Never thought I'd hear of a church-coffehouse.




What next? The Church of McDonalds?

NewChief
05-22-2008, 10:28 AM
Never thought I'd hear of a church-coffehouse.




What next? The Church of McDonalds?


Almost all of the megachurches have coffee houses and gift shops in them. The lobby of CoR in KC looks like you just walked into an airport or mall.

Joie
05-22-2008, 10:34 AM
Almost all of the megachurches have coffee houses and gift shops in them. The lobby of CoR in KC looks like you just walked into an airport or mall.

Oh my. When I was a kid, the only time you got refreshments in church was if the Sunday School teacher brought them or there was a potluck after services.

Bob Dole
05-22-2008, 10:35 AM
Never thought I'd hear of a church-coffehouse.




What next? The Church of McDonalds?

Six Flags over Jesus here in Texarkana has had a trendy coffeehouse attached to it for a couple of years.

ChiTown
05-22-2008, 10:48 AM
Brew onto others, as you would want them to brew onto you.............

Pablo
05-22-2008, 10:59 AM
Yeah, there are two larges churches here in St. Joe, population 75,000.

Both have coffee and gift shops.

Kerberos
05-22-2008, 11:13 AM
They could also sell cigarettes because almost everyone smokes. And condoms because almost everyone, married or not, has sex.


In Goat Cheezes defense I think they should also carry some kind of quick hand lube and some handi wipes.

Joie
05-22-2008, 11:15 AM
In Goat Cheezes defense I think they should also carry some kind of quick hand lube and some handi wipes.

Good point. Should probably have a pron section too.

Kerberos
05-22-2008, 11:23 AM
Good point. Should probably have a pron section too.

By the time they take all of these suggestions they might as well put up a building and call it "The Holy Grail Convenience Corner"

Joie
05-22-2008, 11:31 AM
By the time they take all of these suggestions they might as well put up a building and call it "The Holy Grail Convenience Corner"

The Holy Grail Convenience Corner and Worship Center



Don't forget. it is a church. o:-)

Claynus
05-22-2008, 11:31 AM
I hate big God.

Groves
05-22-2008, 11:36 AM
They should go all the way like these guys.

http://www.larknews.com/may_2008/secondary.php?page=1

Larknews.com is like the Onion, but it's us Christians laughing at ourselves (along with everyone else, appropriately).

sedated
05-22-2008, 12:23 PM
When I was a kid, the only time you got refreshments in church was if the Sunday School teacher brought them or there was a potluck after services.

what about those little bread discs they give to everyone at the end of mass?

acesn8s
05-22-2008, 12:46 PM
No its not free. Its a coffee house. Its a church also. you dont have to go to the services to go buy coffee there.
I think I have been there before. I think it was called Starbucks.

Mr. Flopnuts
05-22-2008, 01:53 PM
Act more and more addicted every time you go down there. Tell her you've joined support groups and are reading books but just can't help it. You NEED the stuff.

LMAO That's fun. I'm going too.

Joie
05-22-2008, 03:58 PM
what about those little bread discs they give to everyone at the end of mass?

I'm not Catholic...so we never had mass. In fact the only time I've ever been to mass it was a funeral.



I suppose if you want a Catholic Coffeehouse Church it would be appropriate, although scones might go better with the coffee.

Jenson71
05-22-2008, 04:45 PM
I suppose if you want a Catholic Coffeehouse Church it would be appropriate,

It would absolutely not be appropriate.

Rain Man
05-22-2008, 04:50 PM
I think I have been there before. I think it was called Starbucks.

A Jewish friend of mine said that his temple has a StarofdavidBucks now.