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View Full Version : Food and Drink Warning, mass e-mail content: Wal-Mart wine.


Radar Chief
06-11-2008, 09:50 AM
And the repost Nazi’s can suck it. I thought it was funny and don’t care if it’s reposted.

Wal-Mart announced that they will soon be offering customers a new discount item: Wal-Mart's own brand of wine. The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo Winery of California, to produce the spirits at an affordable price, in the $2-5 range. Wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of Wal-Mart brand into their shopping cart, but "there is a market for cheap wine", said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing. She continued, "But the right name is important." Customer surveys were conducted to determine the most attractive name for the Wal-Mart brand. The top surveyed names in popularity are:
10. Chateau Traileur Parc
9. White Trashfindel
8. Big Red Gulp
7. World Championship Riesling
6. NASCARbernet
5. Chef Boyardeaux
4. Peanut Noir
3. I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!
2. Grape Expectations
And the number 1 name for Wal-Mart Wine...
1. Nasti Spumante
According to Micken, "The beauty of Wal-Mart wine is that it can be served with either white meat (Possum) or red meat (Squirrel)."

FAX
06-11-2008, 09:53 AM
Awesome.

FAX

StcChief
06-11-2008, 09:54 AM
ROFL their gonna put 'Dirt Cheap' Cigs/Beer under

blueballs
06-11-2008, 09:55 AM
arbor mist blackberry is the only reason to buy Wally World wine

KCChiefsMan
06-11-2008, 09:56 AM
lol! love it

Radar Chief
06-11-2008, 10:38 AM
I like the top ten but #1 is a bit of a let down. #7 & #3 are the best, IMO.

Adept Havelock
06-11-2008, 10:54 AM
LMAO Nice find. Thanks.

Rausch
06-11-2008, 10:57 AM
arbor mist blackberry is the only reason to buy Wally World wine

...

http://scienceblogs.com/purepedantry/upload/2006/07/2020.jpg

FAX
06-11-2008, 11:10 AM
The left out Tube Sake.

FAX

Radar Chief
06-11-2008, 12:04 PM
...

http://scienceblogs.com/purepedantry/upload/2006/07/2020.jpg

That’s the first thing I thought of. :thumb:

Adept Havelock
06-11-2008, 12:08 PM
Stolen from Monty Python:

WINE EXPERT:
A lot of people in this country pooh-pooh Australian table wines. This is a pity as many fine Australian wines appeal not only to the Australian palate but also to the cognoscenti of Great Britain.

Black Stump Bordeaux is rightly praised as a peppermint flavoured Burgundy, whilst a good Sydney Syrup can rank with any of the world's best sugary wines.

Château Blue, too, has won many prizes; not least for its taste, and its lingering afterburn.

Old Smokey 1968 has been compared favourably to a Welsh claret, whilst the Australian Wino Society thoroughly recommends a 1970 Coq du Rod Laver, which, believe me, has a kick on it like a mule: eight bottles of this and you're really finished. At the opening of the Sydney Bridge Club, they were fishing them out of the main sewers every half an hour.

Of the sparkling wines, the most famous is Perth Pink. This is a bottle with a message in, and the message is 'beware'. This is not a wine for drinking, this is a wine for laying down and avoiding.

Another good fighting wine is Melbourne Old-and-Yellow, which is particularly heavy and should be used only for hand-to-hand combat.

Quite the reverse is true of Château Chunder, which is an appellation contrôlée, specially grown for those keen on regurgitation; a fine wine which really opens up the sluices at both ends.

Real emetic fans will also go for a Hobart Muddy, and a prize winning Cuivre Reserve Château Bottled Nuit San Wogga Wogga, which has a bouquet like an aborigine's armpit.

King_Chief_Fan
06-11-2008, 12:47 PM
ROFL their gonna put 'Dirt Cheap' Cigs/Beer under
ROFL competition for the 30 dime wine

InChiefsHell
06-11-2008, 12:52 PM
arbor mist blackberry is the only reason to buy Wally World wine

:spock: