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View Full Version : Poop I just went Ginsu on a Fly all Mr. Miyagi style.


Ari Chi3fs
07-08-2008, 10:21 AM
This fly was all flying.

The wall was off yellow, with no wall hangings.

That mofo never had a chance.

First,

I smacked it with my left hand and made it bounce off wall, it came back at me... caught it with my right hand.... shook it vigorously, then threw it on the floor and stomped it little ass.

It didn't have a fighting chance.

http://www.mentalfloss.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/miyagi.jpg

ChiTown
07-08-2008, 10:23 AM
I see you are putting that KU diploma to work for you........

;)

Ari Chi3fs
07-08-2008, 10:24 AM
Im a ninja man. Don't hate. Besides, imagine what a ninja like me could do a Wildcat!?

blueballs
07-08-2008, 10:27 AM
rinse hands with vinegar and water

Skip Towne
07-08-2008, 10:32 AM
You a bad mofo

Gonzo
07-08-2008, 10:41 AM
You have beginner luck.

Hog Farmer
07-08-2008, 12:56 PM
You didn't hurt your vagina did you ?

Braincase
07-08-2008, 01:09 PM
Can't vouch for your "wax on", but few would doubt your expertise in "whacks off".

kepp
07-08-2008, 01:09 PM
I see you are putting that KU diploma to work for you........

;)

I believe that would be called going "While Owl" on the fly.

Fire Me Boy!
07-08-2008, 01:17 PM
I've done something similar with my pee stream. TWICE!

FAX
07-08-2008, 01:21 PM
Impressive.

I once smacked the crap out of a wasp with a 9 iron. That wasp doesn't come around here any more, I can tell you that.

Also (and I'm very, very proud of this), I once struck a squirrel right square on the forehead with a Fruit Wheat from a distance of about 16 yards.

FAX

seclark
07-08-2008, 01:23 PM
Also (and I'm very, very proud of this), I once struck a squirrel right square on the forehead with a Fruit Wheat from a distance of about 16 yards.

FAX

the hell is a fruit wheat?
sec

FAX
07-08-2008, 01:28 PM
the hell is a fruit wheat?
sec

They are a boxed cereal product, Mr. seclark. Little shredded wheat squares pumped full of fruit glom, like strawberry or blueberry. I haven't seen any peach ones.

I was having breakfast and, ever alert, noticed this squirrel eating all the seeds out of the bird feeder in the back yard. So, I grabbed a fruit wheat, sauntered John Wayne style out onto the back deck, and nailed that little bastard right between the eyes from a great distance. The beautiful and witty Mrs. FAX witnessed the event and was very impressed, I can tell you.

FAX

seclark
07-08-2008, 01:34 PM
They are a boxed cereal product, Mr. seclark. Little shredded wheat squares pumped full of fruit glom, like strawberry or blueberry. I haven't seen any peach ones.

I was having breakfast and, ever alert, noticed this squirrel eating all the seeds out of the bird feeder in the back yard. So, I grabbed a fruit wheat, sauntered John Wayne style out onto the back deck, and nailed that little bastard right between the eyes from a great distance. The beautiful and witty Mrs. FAX witnessed the event and was very impressed, I can tell you.

FAX

i'm in awe of your cereal chucking abilities...was it still crunchy, or soggy from milk?
sec

Fire Me Boy!
07-08-2008, 01:34 PM
They are a boxed cereal product, Mr. seclark. Little shredded wheat squares pumped full of fruit glom, like strawberry or blueberry. I haven't seen any peach ones.

I was having breakfast and, ever alert, noticed this squirrel eating all the seeds out of the bird feeder in the back yard. So, I grabbed a fruit wheat, sauntered John Wayne style out onto the back deck, and nailed that little bastard right between the eyes from a great distance. The beautiful and witty Mrs. FAX witnessed the event and was very impressed, I can tell you.

FAX

Not as impressive as hitting one with your pee stream. And the little buggers I hit were NOT just sitting on the toilet. No, they were buzzing around inside the bowl.

:harumph:

Damn FAX... stealing my thunder.

FAX
07-08-2008, 01:46 PM
i'm in awe of your cereal chucking abilities...was it still crunchy, or soggy from milk?
sec

I'm no heathen, Mr. seclark. It was fresh out of the box. And, not to brag or anything, but it isn't easy to nail a squirrel square in the noggin with a Fruit Wheat from that distance since a Fruit Wheat is not particularly aerodynamic. It is a square with little ridges all over where they mush the wheat together to form each individual cereal thing using some kind of special Fruit Wheat construction process at the factory.

No doubt, it would be a whole lot easier with Breakfast Boomerangs.

FAX

seclark
07-08-2008, 01:49 PM
No doubt, it would be a whole lot easier with Breakfast Boomerangs.

FAX

or a bowl of oatmeal.
sec

FAX
07-08-2008, 02:03 PM
Not as impressive as hitting one with your pee stream. And the little buggers I hit were NOT just sitting on the toilet. No, they were buzzing around inside the bowl.

:harumph:

Damn FAX... stealing my thunder.

I understand, Mr. Fire Me Boy!. But, what you have to realize is that the Way of the Fruit Wheat requires years of discipline and complete and total sacrifice to the art. Only those who are willing to forego their past lives and dedicate themselves fully to the Fruit Wheat technique can hope to one day acquire the skill, patience, and ability to master the Fruit Wheat.

FAX

chasedude
07-08-2008, 02:13 PM
I understand, Mr. Fire Me Boy!. But, what you have to realize is that the Way of the Fruit Wheat requires years of discipline and complete and total sacrifice to the art. Only those who are willing to forego their past lives and dedicate themselves fully to the Fruit Wheat technique can hope to one day acquire the skill, patience, and ability to master the Fruit Wheat.

FAX

Imagine if it was really a fruit wheat that David threw to slay Goliath? :LOL:

FAX
07-08-2008, 02:22 PM
Imagine if it was really a fruit wheat that David threw to slay Goliath? :LOL:

The thing is that a Fruit Wheat may not be able to actually slay anybody, Mr. chasedude. This one just bounced off the squirrel's stupid, fuzzy head. The way I figure it, squirrels are constantly getting pegged on the bean by falling acorns and stuff and he probably just thought it was one of those.

FAX

Skip Towne
07-08-2008, 02:28 PM
Impressive.

I once smacked the crap out of a wasp with a 9 iron. That wasp doesn't come around here any more, I can tell you that.

Also (and I'm very, very proud of this), I once struck a squirrel right square on the forehead with a Fruit Wheat from a distance of about 16 yards.

FAX
You'd have gotten better yardage with a 4 iron.

Hog Farmer
07-08-2008, 02:47 PM
About 3 months ago I shot a Jack Rabbit in the head at 100 yards. Thats not that big a deal except for the fact it was running full stride from left to right. My brother was witness. Shot it with a .17 caliber with a sweet 17 scope. Even I was amazed!

Skip Towne
07-08-2008, 02:49 PM
About 3 months ago I shot a Jack Rabbit in the head at 100 yards. Thats not that big a deal except for the fact it was running full stride from left to right. My brother was witness. Shot it with a .17 caliber with a sweet 17 scope. Even I was amazed!

Hogwash.

Stryker
07-08-2008, 03:01 PM
From youtube

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCdJMMQw1Mc

Stryker
07-08-2008, 03:06 PM
Personally, I like the tennis serve method. Horse flys, bumble bees, dirt dobbers, whatever flys and is annoying. Let them get in range and heave up a fly swatter as demonstrated below:

http://www.tigers.ru/inters/tennis/pete_serve.jpg

Booyaka!