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View Full Version : Prayer Request My god...what have I done?


DaFace
09-28-2008, 09:33 AM
Earlier this week, my wife asked me if I would mind inviting her family over today to watch the game. For some reason, I said yes. Now, in only a couple hours, a small crowd will descend upon my abode. Now let's look at the characteristics of the group who will be here (excluding myself):

Approximate ages:
6, 12, 16, 23, 26, 26, 33, 50ish (3)

Gender distribution:
Female (8), Male (2)

Football knowledge level:
Low (6), Medium (3), High (1)

Amount of "off-topic" chatter during the game:
Low (2), Medium (3), High (5)

Favorite team:
Broncos (9), Lions (1), Chiefs (0)

:eek:

I fear for my life. Or theirs.

Ari Chi3fs
09-28-2008, 09:36 AM
Rain man must be proud at the way you break down demographics.

Tuckdaddy
09-28-2008, 09:38 AM
Rain man must be proud at the way you break down demographics.

It was impressive.

DaFace
09-28-2008, 09:38 AM
Rain man must be proud at the way you break down demographics.

Perhaps. Maybe I should have included some charts.

Frazod
09-28-2008, 09:47 AM
Serves you right for moving to Denver.

Demonpenz
09-28-2008, 09:49 AM
I ****ing hate watching with people who aren't obsessed with football. I hate this one in GENERAL

random guy... RUN YOUR ROUTE BEYOND THE STICKS

I rewind my dvr and that safty is sitting on that first down marker and has inside help from the middle linebacker. Thus only way to get open is cutting route of short.

kstater
09-28-2008, 09:50 AM
You could look at it this way, you have at least 5 women to gawk at.

DaFace
09-28-2008, 09:52 AM
You could look at it this way, you have at least 5 women to gawk at.

I could. But then I'd be gawking at my wife (PBJ), her two sisters (:(), her mom (:shake:), and her aunt (:Lin:).

trndobrd
09-28-2008, 10:01 AM
Here's the plan. Tivo the game. Pull out the old VCR and dig out a game you taped back in 1997 to play for your audience. They won't know the difference and you can go back and watch the game in peace after they leave.

It's that or fill a sock full of nickels and enforce strict "no talking" rule.

DaFace
09-28-2008, 10:02 AM
Here's the plan. Tivo the game. Pull out the old VCR and dig out a game you taped back in 1997 to play for your audience. They won't know the difference and you can go back and watch the game in peace after they leave.

It's that or fill a sock full of nickels and enforce strict "no talking" rule.

Ooohh...that's an idea. I DID record the 1994 Montana magic game when it was on the other day. Think they'd notice if they were suddenly watching Elway and Montana duke it out?

Vegas_Dave
09-28-2008, 10:04 AM
Dumb dumb dumb dumb
Dumb dumb dumb dumb
DUUUMMMMBBBBB

Bearcat
09-28-2008, 10:06 AM
I'd say whenever the Broncos score or stop the Chiefs, you could try to turn everyone on the lonely Lions fan by laughing and pointing and yelling "OMFG, at least we aren't the Lions!".... but, since Matt Millen was fired, they at least have some hope. And they won't lose their bye week as bad as we'll lose to Denver. Yeah, you're f***ed.

kstater
09-28-2008, 10:09 AM
Mock the Denver fans by yelling IN-COM-PLETE at the top of your lungs every time Hutard misses a pass.

milkman
09-28-2008, 10:09 AM
I'd say that when you agreed, you had a Herm ****ing Edwards moment.

DaFace
09-28-2008, 10:10 AM
I'd say that when you agreed, you had a Herm ****ing Edwards moment.

ROFL

I should confess that, generally, I like my in-laws. They're not "asshole" Donkey fans or anything. But still...I almost hope that they put us out of our misery early so that I can just laugh it off.

Bearcat
09-28-2008, 10:10 AM
I ****ing hate watching with people who aren't obsessed with football. I hate this one in GENERAL

random guy... RUN YOUR ROUTE BEYOND THE STICKS

I rewind my dvr and that safty is sitting on that first down marker and has inside help from the middle linebacker. Thus only way to get open is cutting route of short.

I think that would be a 'medium'... the worst game time experience I've had was the first half of the Syracuse/Kansas NC game. A friend and her boyfriend, who are very knowledgeable, and 3 older women who had no freakin' clue what was going on. They were just chatting about random crap, talking about cute players, and making fun of us two guys for being "so intense".

Luckily we left at halftime and went to a much, much, much better atmosphere.

Good luck, DaFace. :(

kstater
09-28-2008, 10:12 AM
Or, just start drinking. Heavily.

'Hamas' Jenkins
09-28-2008, 10:12 AM
You have only one solution:

kill yourself.

DaFace
09-28-2008, 10:14 AM
Or, just start drinking. Heavily.

Oh, there's no question on that one. Maybe I should get started early... :hmmm:

ClevelandBronco
09-28-2008, 10:16 AM
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/EYbUCvz1LYE&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/EYbUCvz1LYE&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

HypnotizedMonkey
09-28-2008, 10:44 AM
good luck with that! lol

Lonewolf Ed
09-28-2008, 10:51 AM
Here's the plan. Tivo the game. Pull out the old VCR and dig out a game you taped back in 1997 to play for your audience. They won't know the difference and you can go back and watch the game in peace after they leave.

It's that or fill a sock full of nickels and enforce strict "no talking" rule.

With 8 women in the room, good luck with the no talking rule. You won't be able to hear the game at all!

Ebolapox
09-28-2008, 10:51 AM
brilliant move, einstein.

MichaelH
09-28-2008, 10:52 AM
I look at it this way and please take no offense. First, be happy that you have family close by or are close enough to stop in and watch a game. My family is 625+ miles away. Second, be happy you get to see the game. I'm stuck with the Falcons/Panthers game on FOX and nothing on CBS until 4:00. Although if it's anything like the last 3 this season, drinking heavily and hitting on your wife's aunt might be the thing to do. ;)

KCUnited
09-28-2008, 10:58 AM
Non lethal doses of antifreeze? Misery loves company.

Bowser
09-28-2008, 11:00 AM
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/EYbUCvz1LYE&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/EYbUCvz1LYE&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Stop stealing the good ideas! :D

RedNeckRaider
09-28-2008, 11:05 AM
It would be bad enough to be out numbered by fans of a rival team favored to beat your team in your home. Adding women who know nothing about football talking trash on your team....well sucks to be you! If I were in your shoes about an hour before kickoff I would tell the wife I need to run to the store, I would turn my cell phone off head to a sports bar and watch the game there.

Bowser
09-28-2008, 11:08 AM
Might I suggest this, Face (and a call in to Rain Man tomorrow)....

mesmith31
09-28-2008, 11:17 AM
In this situation it seems as if there is only one way out...."Honey, I am going to run and get some pizza and beer" Then stop by the sports bar for at least 2/3rds of the game.

alanm
09-28-2008, 11:27 AM
Da, If you have another TV in another room take the other guy and watch the game in peace while the women yak it up. That's the only way you'll be able to watch the game. Take it from experience.

Rain Man
09-28-2008, 11:31 AM
(Ring, ring)

DaFace: Hello?

Rain Man: I need you today for some observational research.

DaFace (to family): Gosh, guys. My boss needs to me for an observational research project. I have to go meet with him.

Rain Man: Bring pizza.

Mr. Laz
09-28-2008, 11:38 AM
Gender distribution:
Female (8), Male (2)

Favorite team:
Broncos (9), Lions (1), Chiefs (0)

yikes!

FAX
09-28-2008, 11:40 AM
I like the bag of nickles idea. Load up and start swingin'.

FAX

DaFace
09-28-2008, 01:37 PM
Wow...so far so good! Even if we lose this one, it's been a pleasant first half!

dtebbe
09-28-2008, 01:56 PM
Donkey estrogen overload alert! ROFL

DT

chiefs4me
09-28-2008, 02:45 PM
Wow...so far so good! Even if we lose this one, it's been a pleasant first half!




the in laws are at your house and the chiefs aren't playing horrible...you have already invited them for the next game haven't you..:D

Phobia
09-28-2008, 02:48 PM
Honestly though, I would categorize your football knowledge as better than "low", daface.

DaFace
09-28-2008, 03:35 PM
At the risk of inviting endless ridicule...

http://img254.imageshack.us/img254/4187/broncoscp0.jpg

Note the beer spill on my right shoulder as I jumped up following the Chiefs' final touchdown. You can harldly tell that I'm wearing a goofy Chiefs felt helmet with a normal "baseball" cap on top. Not to mention the Chiefs pajama pants.

Wow. A fun day after all. They're all distraught, which makes me happy. :)

Der Flöprer
09-28-2008, 03:36 PM
You did good. That's what you did.

MIAdragon
09-28-2008, 03:38 PM
NICE!

BigOlChiefsfan
09-28-2008, 03:49 PM
Maybe I should have included some charts.

http://americandigest.org/piechart.jpg

My favorite piechart

Bowser
09-28-2008, 04:04 PM
At the risk of inviting endless ridicule...

http://img254.imageshack.us/img254/4187/broncoscp0.jpg

Note the beer spill on my right shoulder as I jumped up following the Chiefs' final touchdown. You can harldly tell that I'm wearing a goofy Chiefs felt helmet with a normal "baseball" cap on top. Not to mention the Chiefs pajama pants.

Wow. A fun day after all. They're all distraught, which makes me happy. :)

This screams "avatar".

Buehler445
09-28-2008, 09:34 PM
ROFL @ this thread (with emphasis on the prayer thread label).

I'm glad your afternoon turned out well for you. Where can I get me one of those hats?

evolve27
09-28-2008, 09:39 PM
This is absolutely amazing.

HypnotizedMonkey
09-29-2008, 01:55 PM
nice armpit sweat cover-up story! ROFL

DaFace
09-29-2008, 01:56 PM
nice armpit sweat cover-up story! ROFL

Heh...that would have less of a mess. I got it all over my couch, too, though you can't see it in the pic.

Hog Farmer
09-29-2008, 02:05 PM
WOW! 9 Donko fans. Did you get thrown out of your own house. You must have felt silly being the only happy camper!

HypnotizedMonkey
09-29-2008, 02:12 PM
Heh...that would have less of a mess. I got it all over my couch, too, though you can't see it in the pic.

Chiefs TDs can lead to messy moments. I almost shat myself. :)

Ari Chi3fs
09-29-2008, 02:15 PM
nice. Glad you were able to witness the sadness of sooo many donko lovers.

Midnight_Vulture
09-29-2008, 02:21 PM
Oh man I would talked so much smack.

chasedude
09-29-2008, 02:22 PM
<object width="425" height="344">

<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/EYbUCvz1LYE&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></object>

Nice reference exactly what I was thinking... Rep


And you may ask yourself, am I right... am I wrong? And you may ask yourself my god... what have I done?

Dartgod
09-29-2008, 03:02 PM
Oh man I would have taxed them bidges
Fixed it...