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Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:28 PM
Welcome!

Reerun_KC
11-16-2008, 10:29 PM
Welcome, BUT

http://images.ibsrv.net/ibsrv/res/src:www.ls1tech.com/get/forums/images/smilies/threadworthlesswithoutpics.gif

Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:29 PM
We are picking out a username as we speak!

Reerun_KC
11-16-2008, 10:29 PM
:rockon:

StcChief
11-16-2008, 10:29 PM
good for her.... someone else to abuse.

Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:30 PM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:30 PM
This thread will lead to hilarity I'm sure.

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:30 PM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

See what I mean!

boogblaster
11-16-2008, 10:31 PM
Don't you usualy call her "my left-hand" ...

blueballs
11-16-2008, 10:32 PM
use both hands and have a threesome

Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:33 PM
real life situations with us

Dr. Facebook Fever
11-16-2008, 10:33 PM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

Well there goes my question.

Rausch
11-16-2008, 10:34 PM
Worst fucking idea you've ever had. Easily...

Ari Chi3fs
11-16-2008, 10:34 PM
Hall of Fame material!!





TAGS: demonpenz has a very small penis, its an "inny", Fail Whale

Reerun_KC
11-16-2008, 10:34 PM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

Dude!:spock:

DeezNutz
11-16-2008, 10:35 PM
Is she a three-input woman?

Mr. Kotter
11-16-2008, 10:35 PM
Don't you usualy call her "my left-hand" ...

Rosie. Heh. She has four sisters.....


<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/cBXHZNSUtyg&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/cBXHZNSUtyg&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

StcChief
11-16-2008, 10:35 PM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate lookingso your bag broke ROFL

stumppy
11-16-2008, 10:35 PM
I feel it is my duty, since I'm one of the few who have taken this roller coaster ride with Sybill at the switch, to offer a small bit of advice.


Bad Idea !





My conscience is clear.

blueballs
11-16-2008, 10:36 PM
stole Thigpen's girl
you scoundral

Bugeater
11-16-2008, 10:37 PM
Worst ****ing idea you've ever had. Easily...

Not even, this could be exactly what the Planet needs.

Rausch
11-16-2008, 10:38 PM
so your bag broke ROFL

His bag will after this...

I
I
I
I
I
V

Frazod
11-16-2008, 10:38 PM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

I hope sex is something you can live without for awhile. LMAO

Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:39 PM
yay

Reerun_KC
11-16-2008, 10:39 PM
I hope sex is something you can live without for awhile. LMAO

ROFL

booger
11-16-2008, 10:40 PM
(.)(.)

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:40 PM
I hope sex is something you can live without for awhile. LMAO

Plenty of unfortunate looking people have sex, just no one wants to think about it or see it.

DeezNutz
11-16-2008, 10:41 PM
Plenty of unfortunate looking people have sex, just no one wants to think about it or see it.

98% of the people I see during the day are fucking ugly. I'm guessing some of them have sex.

boogblaster
11-16-2008, 10:42 PM
Sorry Demonhand , welcome to the Planet, may your fingers never grow old or become rough and dry ....

Rausch
11-16-2008, 10:42 PM
Plenty of unfortunate looking people have sex, just no one wants to think about it or see it.

Indeed.

But usually the prelude isn't "Hey, we're both fucking ugly, let's slap hips and sweat a little..."

Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:42 PM
barry manilow is on

DeezNutz
11-16-2008, 10:43 PM
Indeed.

But usually the prelude isn't "Hey, we're both ****ing ugly, let's slap hips and sweat a little..."

True. It's usually, "Wanna turn off the lights?" Followed with a very quick, "Sure."

Buehler445
11-16-2008, 10:43 PM
ROFL

This thread has some SERIOUS potential

Reerun_KC
11-16-2008, 10:44 PM
ROFL

This thread has some SERIOUS potential

For a serious disaster!

DeezNutz
11-16-2008, 10:44 PM
barry manilow is on

I'm sure the follow up will show you earning your redwings...

booger
11-16-2008, 10:44 PM
Yay!!1! Tomato soup day

Buehler445
11-16-2008, 10:44 PM
barry manilow is on

Dude, you gotta mark that shit on the calendar!

J Diddy
11-16-2008, 10:45 PM
barry manilow is on


Holy fucking shit


ROFL

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:45 PM
Indeed.

But usually the prelude isn't "Hey, we're both fucking ugly, let's slap hips and sweat a little..."

I should try that as a pickup line.

Rausch
11-16-2008, 10:46 PM
98% of the people I see during the day are ****ing ugly. I'm guessing some of them have sex.

I'm also thinking they do it far more often than they should...

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:46 PM
98% of the people I see during the day are fucking ugly. I'm guessing some of them have sex.

If you're including me in this I will have to kill you.

booger
11-16-2008, 10:46 PM
Plenty of unfortunate looking people have sex, just no one wants to think about it or see it.

He should know guys...........he is living proof of this :)

Reerun_KC
11-16-2008, 10:46 PM
I'm also thinking they do it far more often than they should... ROFL

Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:46 PM
to sleep

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:47 PM
He should know guys...........he is living proof of this :)

How dare you....

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:47 PM
I'm also thinking they do it far more often than they should...

You know what always messes with my head? When you see a really hot chicks parents and they're both butt ugly.

Rausch
11-16-2008, 10:48 PM
I should try that as a pickup line.

Highly ineffective.

I wasn't always the charming and debonair man you see before you today...

badgirl
11-16-2008, 10:49 PM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

Oh my God I cannot believe you just said that and knowing she is going to join, when she reads that you are in the doghouse for a while.:spock:

DeezNutz
11-16-2008, 10:49 PM
You know what always messes with my head? When you see a really hot chicks parents and they're both butt ugly.

True. When her mom is a fucking cow, and then you're struck with the realization that it's only a matter of time.

booger
11-16-2008, 10:50 PM
How dare you....

At least your not Claythan and concieved from buttsex

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:50 PM
At least your not Claythan and concieved from buttsex

LOL...hey that's how I avoid kids!

Rausch
11-16-2008, 10:50 PM
You know what always messes with my head? When you see a really hot chicks parents and they're both butt ugly.

Recessive genes.

Has to be...

DeezNutz
11-16-2008, 10:51 PM
At least your not Claythan and concieved from buttsex

There it is again. Random posters linking Mecca and anal sex.

Rausch
11-16-2008, 10:52 PM
LOL...hey that's how I avoid kids!

Heh.

If only I'd listened to grandpa Rausch...

booger
11-16-2008, 10:52 PM
LOL...hey that's how I avoid kids!

the evacuate before you ejaculate technique is risky

Bugeater
11-16-2008, 10:52 PM
Oh my God I cannot believe you just said that and knowing she is going to join, when she reads that you are in the doghouse for a while.:spock:
http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/attachment.php?attachmentid=72732&d=1189472093

Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:52 PM
OMG DELISH

StcChief
11-16-2008, 10:53 PM
Indeed.

But usually the prelude isn't "Hey, we're both ****ing ugly, let's slap hips and sweat a little..."you freakin' german.... what a bad visual.

DeezNutz
11-16-2008, 10:54 PM
OMG DELISH

Never hard. Drinking cock. It's starting to come together...

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:55 PM
the evacuate before you ejaculate technique is risky

It doesn't matter if you're having butt sex...

booger
11-16-2008, 10:56 PM
It doesn't matter if you're having butt sex...

Tell that to claythan's parents

booger
11-16-2008, 10:57 PM
Give her a walrus demonpenz

Rausch
11-16-2008, 10:57 PM
the evacuate before you ejaculate technique is risky

That's not some $#it where I'm going to fuck around until practice makes perfect...

boogblaster
11-16-2008, 10:58 PM
Go Queef was the result of butt-sex ... I had him figured as something that happened when animals are locked-up together too long and they cross-breed ...

J Diddy
11-16-2008, 10:58 PM
It doesn't matter if you're having butt sex...


I try to avoid the corn during porn....

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:58 PM
Tell that to claythan's parents

Well under this thought......gay people can have kids!

booger
11-16-2008, 10:59 PM
That's not some $#it where I'm going to **** around until practice makes perfect...

Thank the lord for pearl necklaces

Mecca
11-16-2008, 10:59 PM
I try to avoid the corn during porn....

You know all the pornstars I like do alot of anal work, not surprising eh?

Demonpenz
11-16-2008, 10:59 PM
mcstufferson

booger
11-16-2008, 11:00 PM
Well under this thought......gay people can have kids!

It's the only explanation of his existance

booger
11-16-2008, 11:01 PM
Is that a plunger?

That won't bring the sperm back out.

Rausch
11-16-2008, 11:01 PM
you freakin' german.... what a bad visual.

Boo!

http://www.subvulture.com/archive/ugly_goth_couple.jpg

blueballs
11-16-2008, 11:02 PM
It's a Demonpenz and Ari
race off to see who hits 100 post first
Skip cries

Rausch
11-16-2008, 11:04 PM
You know all the pornstars I like do alot of anal work, not surprising eh?

And it finally happened, we agree on something.

Mecca
11-16-2008, 11:07 PM
And it finally happened, we agree on something.

LOL, you know I have a bit of an abrasive at times personality but I'm pretty mellow most people here probably agree with me about alot more stuff than they realize.

But hey Tory Lane for the record.

StcChief
11-16-2008, 11:09 PM
Boo!

http://www.subvulture.com/archive/ugly_goth_couple.jpgROFL but deserving....

a 100 post thread in the making.

Rausch
11-16-2008, 11:13 PM
LOL, you know I have a bit of an abrasive at times personality but I'm pretty mellow most people here probably agree with me about alot more stuff than they realize.

But hey Tory Lane for the record.

I like the classics.

Juli Ashton or that red head Chloe something...

SPchief
11-16-2008, 11:14 PM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

Well this thread is gonna get good.

Mecca
11-16-2008, 11:14 PM
Oh do you like Kylie Ireland then, she does alot nastier stuff now.....

I always like Asia Carrera.

booger
11-16-2008, 11:14 PM
If she's really dirty she will ask you to stick one hand up her butt and the other in her 'Gina. Next if she asks you to start clapping and making seal noises you know she is really "the one".

Fish
11-16-2008, 11:34 PM
Love.......

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Rausch
11-16-2008, 11:51 PM
If she's really dirty she will ask you to stick one hand up her butt and the other in her 'Gina. Next if she asks you to start clapping and making seal noises you know she is really "the one".

If you can force a grasper up each pipe, dude, she's not the one for me.

Darth CarlSatan
11-17-2008, 12:08 AM
Oh do you like Kylie Ireland then, she does alot nastier stuff now.....

I always like Asia Carrera.

Asia was awesome; she LIVED to fuck.

Darth CarlSatan
11-17-2008, 12:11 AM
If she's really dirty she will ask you to stick one hand up her butt and the other in her 'Gina. Next if she asks you to start clapping and making seal noises you know she is really "the one".

"And Dudley Dawson TAKES IT TO THE HOLE"!

:doh!: Ska-Duump-BA!

Darth CarlSatan
11-17-2008, 12:20 AM
yay

Demonpenz is GOD.

Tribal Warfare
11-17-2008, 12:24 AM
Oh do you like Kylie Ireland then, she does alot nastier stuff now.....

I always like Asia Carrera.

my personal favs in the mid to late 90's were Sydnee Steele and Gina Ryder

BWillie
11-17-2008, 12:25 AM
Girlfriends suck dude. I somehow acquired about a week ago. I am getting old and lazy. At least she cooks me eggs and cleans my house. I think that is what did me in.

Darth CarlSatan
11-17-2008, 12:31 AM
my personal favs in the mid to late 90's were Sydnee Steele and Gina Ryder

Sylvia Saint was cool before she started getting all ass to mouth skanky...:shake:

KcMizzou
11-17-2008, 12:32 AM
Girlfriends suck dude. I somehow acquired about a week ago. I am getting old and lazy. At least she cooks me eggs and cleans my house. I think that is what did me in.Reminds me of this article.

This dude always reminds me of EnDelt, because of the picture.




I Guess I Got A Girlfriend

The Cruise
By Jim Anchower

Hola amigos. What's shakin'? I know it's been a long time since I rapped at ya, but the waters are not always smooth in Lake Anchower. The brakes on my Festiva were starting to whine and grind, which really pissed me off. If it's not one thing, it's another with that car. I was gonna sell it and let someone else have the headache of fixing the brakes, but then gas went up to $3 a gallon, and my Festiva gets like 35 miles to the gallon. These gas prices can suck my ass. I remember when it used to cost $12 to fill up my car.

So, I had them fix the brakes, and I spent a day giving her a tune-up myself. Changed the plugs, the wires, filters—everything. I even wiped off all the crap on the engine. I hate getting started on that stuff, but once I'm up to my elbows in oil, nothing feels better. Now it's in great shape, which is more than I could say for me.

You may think that my life is pretty sweet, and who could blame you? Usually, Jim Anchower drives where he wants, drinks what he wants, tokes when he wants, and doesn't take much shit from anyone unless he absolutely has to. But lately, things have changed in a big way.

My summer was packed full of hanging out, keeping Ron from accidentally burning his place down, and getting together with Wes, which has been hard to do since he moved. Anyway, a few days ago, there was a knock on the door while I was trying to find my keys so I could make a beer run. I opened the door, and this woman was standing there.

Now, I had no idea who she was. All I knew was that I had five minutes to get to the liquor store before it closed, and someone I don't know is in my way. Plus, I might have forgotten to pay some bill she was there to collect, in which case I wouldn't have beer money anymore, so I told her this is a bad time and tried to get past her. That's when I noticed she was carrying a 12-pack of Miller Genuine Draft. If she's a bill collector, she knows how to get my attention.

She told me that she was sorry for throwing up on my floor. Then I remembered who she was. She was one of those chicks Ron and his friend Rob brought over to my place to watch Dude, Where's My Car? a couple months back. They were all pretty wasted, and this girl, Debbie, puked all over my floor. It was disgusting. It was all I could do to throw a shopping circular or two over it and wait for it to dry.

I told her it was cool, but I still have to get to the store. She told me that the MGD was for me, and she had another 12-pack in her car. For the first time, I took a good look at her. She's not Pamela Anderson hot or anything, but she's all right to look at. So I invite her in.

So this chick, who I barely know, walks past me and starts making herself at home. She put the 12-pack in the fridge, right on top of the pizza from two days ago. She grabs herself a beer, don't even offer me one, then sits down on my couch and turns on the TV. In my book, that's a hell of a way to say you're sorry, but I let it slide since she brought beer.

We were talking some and watching whatever was on. She seemed cool enough. She was able to keep up with me, beer for beer. I wasn't really paying much attention to the TV. I had a girl on my couch that was probably good to go, if I could figure out how to get the engine running.

I couldn't even remember the last time I dipped the wick, so I was thinking about what I did last time that worked, only I didn't get a chance to make a move. Before I could even come up with something, she was all over me.

Now, I don't want you making any judgments on me. I did what any man would do in my position: bumped uglies. I ain't going to tell you any more details than that. All I'll say is, she sure as hell wasn't puking that night. I mean, she got up to use the bathroom once or twice, but I don't think she puked or anything.

The next morning, I woke up thinking she was gone. I don't like a lot of snuggle bunny shit, so I was glad I had some space to get my head together, which was hard because I was pretty hung over. I went to the kitchen, and there was Debbie going through my cupboards. I asked her what the hell she was doing, and she told me that she was looking for coffee. I told her that I don't have any.

That would be enough for most anyone, but not her. She just kept rummaging through my shit without answering me, as if she didn't believe me. I told her that there was a gas station two blocks away and maybe she could just pop down there and pick some up. That seemed reasonable to me, but not to her. She turned and looked at me like she was going to rip my head off, and said that if I was a man, I'd get my ass down to that gas station and pick her up the biggest coffee they had with cream and sugar.

I didn't even know what to say. I believe in being a gentleman and all, but I don't usually have someone yelling at me first thing in the morning. I was about to say that when she reached in the cupboard and threw a pot at me. That was all the encouragement I needed. I went down to the gas station and got two coffees, one for me and one for her.

I got back and she was sitting on the couch flipping channels. She hung out for a while and watched TV, finally leaving at 2:30. But before she left, she said if I had plans that night, I better change 'em, 'cause we were going to a movie.

Seriously, I like getting some trim, but I'm not too big on having to look after someone else. See, I like to play it by my rules. No compromises, no remorse. I don't need no one to tell me when to be home and what we're doing this weekend. She drops by unannounced with beer once or twice a week, then expects me to drop everything so we can get busy? Hell, I'm not a machine.

Jim Anchower has to have some space. I can't have Debbie telling me where to go and what to do. I figure I can only take another month or so of this before I let her go. Don't worry, I'll let her down easy. I'm king of the breakup. I just need to get some weed in the system first so I can get myself in the zone.

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/41456

Tribal Warfare
11-17-2008, 12:36 AM
Sylvia Saint was cool before she started getting all ass to mouth skanky...:shake:

She was cool and another was/is Dasha. I hear ya with the point blank disappoint, I have the same issue with Devon. She was smoking hot when she first started, Now she looks like has anorexia with a bad nose job.

Darth CarlSatan
11-17-2008, 12:42 AM
She was cool and another was/is Dasha. I hear ya with the point blank disappoint, I have the same issue with Devon. She was smoking hot when she first started, Now she looks like has anorexia with a bad nose job.

Well Sylvia and this other face time Brunette were from the Czech Republic, and having lived in Prague for a year myself, I can tell you that there are NO politics when it comes to fucking; it's just fucking, and if you're good at it you'll do a lot of it.
And it's one of several reasons you'll always hear me advocate for eastern and western Europe; they get a LOT of shit right over there socially and culturally.

:toast:

Kerberos
11-17-2008, 05:24 AM
You know what always messes with my head? When you see a really hot chicks parents and they're both butt ugly.

Recessive genes.

Has to be...


Come on guys ... Don't you remember your basic math?

Two negatives make a positive!!!!11!1!!

I think?

:hmmm:

Kerberos
11-17-2008, 05:31 AM
Oh do you like Kylie Ireland then, she does alot nastier stuff now.....

I always like Asia Carrera.


Man all them chicks give themselves enemas and duche' before they have some skinbus ramming their cornh0le.

Would you want to see corn when you pulled out?

cookster50
11-17-2008, 05:46 AM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

Lol, for real!

ROYC75
11-17-2008, 06:53 AM
haha I think she would kill me if I posted pictures, she is somewhat unfortunate looking

:eek::eek:HOLY COW :eek::eek:

Bad start, dog house material already. Already penalized before the game starts.

:doh!:

Coach
11-17-2008, 11:37 AM
So, is this the gal?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v498/dartsoccer8/Ellie035.jpg

Good luck.

gblowfish
11-17-2008, 12:08 PM
AAAAAAGH MY EYES!!!!!

Not that two bagger again.

Better that his "girlfriend" inflates.

morphius
11-17-2008, 12:14 PM
And here I figured your right hand had been posting all along...

Demonpenz
11-17-2008, 12:17 PM
I am actually a lefty when it comes to handling myself. I don't know what it is with being hungover and pulling the goalie, yesterday I went on a wacking bender. I got up to 4 then I think I had a mild stroke. I am still seeing fuzzy in my right eye

Goapics1
11-17-2008, 12:18 PM
I am actually a lefty when it comes to handling myself. I don't know what it is with being hungover and pulling the goalie, yesterday I went on a wacking bender. I got up to 4 then I think I had a mild stroke. I am still seeing fuzzy in my right eye

TMI.

Buck
11-17-2008, 12:28 PM
Reminds me of this article.

This dude always reminds me of EnDelt, because of the picture.


http://www.theonion.com/content/node/41456

So, it comes from the Onion, but is it a real article?

If so, thats pretty fucking weird.

Skip Towne
11-17-2008, 12:41 PM
We need a pic of the new Planet member.

Mr. Plow
11-17-2008, 12:45 PM
So, is this the gal?

Good luck.

Dude brah.....stop posting those pics, brah.

Mecca
11-17-2008, 12:48 PM
Well Sylvia and this other face time Brunette were from the Czech Republic, and having lived in Prague for a year myself, I can tell you that there are NO politics when it comes to fucking; it's just fucking, and if you're good at it you'll do a lot of it.
And it's one of several reasons you'll always hear me advocate for eastern and western Europe; they get a LOT of shit right over there socially and culturally.

:toast:

Nikita De-nise? I have to type it that way due to the filter.

Hog Farmer
11-17-2008, 12:50 PM
We need a pic of the new Planet member.


No we don't!!!!!!!!!

Skip Towne
11-17-2008, 12:54 PM
No we don't!!!!!!!!!

Why not? Beat with the ugly stick?

Hog Farmer
11-17-2008, 12:57 PM
I've got a feelin she fell from the very top of the Ugly Tree and hit every single branch on the way down.

Demonpenz
11-17-2008, 01:08 PM
She would punch you guys for what you are saying if she didn't have limited movement in her arms

Mecca
11-17-2008, 01:12 PM
She would punch you guys for what you are saying if she didn't have limited movement in her arms

Handjobs are out eh?

Demonpenz
11-17-2008, 01:14 PM
Handjobs are out eh?

sort of. I usually just put my hands over her hand. and stroke

Hog Farmer
11-17-2008, 01:29 PM
She would punch you guys for what you are saying if she didn't have limited movement in her arms



OK! I take back what I said earlier!

WE NEED PIC"S!!!!!!!!!!

Chiefs Pantalones
11-17-2008, 01:36 PM
I welcomed her to my planet last night

fuck someone already said that

ROYC75
11-17-2008, 01:38 PM
I've got a feelin she fell from the very top of the Ugly Tree and hit every single branch on the way down.

ROFL :doh!:

RJ
11-17-2008, 02:45 PM
sort of. I usually just put my hands over her hand. and stroke


That's a good idea, otherwise she might feel left out.