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View Full Version : Food and Drink Brazil nuts. What good are they?


TinyEvel
11-29-2008, 10:05 PM
It's holiday time folks.

That means it's that time of year for the bowl of "mixed nuts" in every family function, office function, bank function, function function, conjunction function, etc. etc. etc.

Personally, I like the peanuts. They are the working man's nut. Many a nut-seeker will fish out the cashews and almonds like a cat who has suddenly come upon a fishing boat who then eschews its Cat-Chow. But I like the peanut. It's plentiful, familiar, and I know what I'm going to get.

CAN WE PLEASE KICK THE PERSON'S ASS WHO TAKES ALL THE CASHEWS AND NOTHING ELSE??!!!

Nothing makes me more angry than a bowl of mixed nuts with no cashews. That means some friggen nut-prospector came in there with his thumb and forefinger and plucked all the precious cashews from the bowl. That person is the Grinch who stole the nut mixture :cuss:

Brazil nuts: WTF??!! Who decided that a thumb-sized piece of Formica makes a good nut to eat? Who the hell put Brazil nuts in the bowl? Ikea?!!
I am convinced the nut cartels inserted Brazil nuts into the bowl for mere volume means alone. They are filler nuts.

When I was a kid, an adult once found me weeding the nut bowl of the Brazil nuts and he proclaimed, "Ah, the Camel Toes! Yes, get them out of there, boy!"

CAMEL TOE NUTS!!!! Finally, a nut right up there with pu$$ylips-showing pants! :clap:

Yes, of course. Stack em up and let's eat them by the pound!

My final argument against Brazil nuts...Where do they exist anywhere OTHER than the mixed nut bowl?

Roasted cashews: check!
Pecan pie: check!
Peanut butter: Check!
Hazelnut coffee: check
Almonds in salad: check
Brazil nuts in.....
Hello?......
Buehler???

Brazilnut????


The worst thing to come out of Brazil EVARRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!
:cuss:

NUTS!

StcChief
11-29-2008, 10:08 PM
Tye are Good... we won't go their non-PC name.

luv
11-29-2008, 10:09 PM
If you're a peanut guy, then wouldn't you want those who take the cashews and almods out to go first? By the time you get there, all that will be left will be the peanuts. First time I heard them called Brazil Nuts, I didn't know which ones they were. My mom always called them something else.

Saulbadguy
11-29-2008, 10:09 PM
They are good for breaking the ice when you want to tell racist jokes to your friends.

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:09 PM
Tye are Good... we won't go their non-PC name.I know exactly what you mean.

Ugh...lol :shake:

TinyEvel
11-29-2008, 10:11 PM
Oh noes! I'm just kind-of hazily remembering a racist thing about them. Not camel toes, but....

I HATE YOU RACIST JERKS!

ALL THE MORE REASON TO BAN BRAZIL NUTS ALTOGETHER!!!!


(I voted for OBAMA so suck it! MY NUTSACK, THAT IS!!!!!!)

TinyEvel
11-29-2008, 10:12 PM
My avatar is fugging you up right now...ADMIT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ultra Peanut
11-29-2008, 10:12 PM
NO GOODERS GET OFF MY PORCH

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:13 PM
My avatar is fugging you up right now...ADMIT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!That avy always fucks me up. I love it.

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:13 PM
NO GOODERS GET OFF MY PORCHThat one too.

Rain Man
11-29-2008, 10:15 PM
Brazil nuts are the most versatile of nuts. They're tasty, they're filling, they can be used as doorstops, and in a pinch they can even become a weapon. I can't tell you how many times I've been bailed out by a handy Brazil nut.

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:17 PM
Brazil nuts are the most versatile of nuts. They're tasty, they're filling, they can be used as doorstops, and in a pinch they can even become a weapon. I can't tell you how many times I've been bailed out by a handy Brazil nut.Jam a Brazil nut in a motherfucker's eye socket, and they will take notice.

Mr. Kotter
11-29-2008, 10:18 PM
I won't tell you what my Grandma used to call Brazil nuts.... :shake:

Simply Red
11-29-2008, 10:19 PM
This is hidden racism.

luv
11-29-2008, 10:19 PM
I won't tell you what my Grandma used to call Brazil nuts.... :shake:

Probably the same thing my mom always called them.

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:19 PM
I won't tell you what my Grandma used to call Brazil nuts.... :shake:We know... and here I thought it was just my twisted family.

luv
11-29-2008, 10:19 PM
This is hidden racism.

What are you talking about?

Rain Man
11-29-2008, 10:19 PM
Jam a Brazil nut in a mother****er's eye socket, and they will take notice.

When skillfully applied to a prisoner's sciatic nerve, a little pressure from a Brazil nut can also quickly get you information on troop strengths and dispositions.

Mr. Kotter
11-29-2008, 10:21 PM
Probably the same thing my mom always called them.

I just can't imagine people being that....stupid..... :banghead:

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:22 PM
When skillfully applied to a prisoner's sciatic nerve, a little pressure from a Brazil nut can also quickly get you information on troop strengths and dispositions.You're like a video game version of James Bond. That's what I like about you.

Remind me to stay on your good side.

luv
11-29-2008, 10:22 PM
I just can't imagine people being that....stupid..... :banghead:

My mom comes from a small hick town in northern Missouri. It's just what it was.

Baconeater
11-29-2008, 10:22 PM
This is hidden racism.

Hidden? TinyE is clearly a racist.

Simply Red
11-29-2008, 10:24 PM
What are you talking about?

It's an old thread, duh...

Simply Red
11-29-2008, 10:25 PM
http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=132459&highlight=hidden+racism

Mr. Kotter
11-29-2008, 10:25 PM
My mom comes from a small hick town in northern Missouri. It's just what it was.

My Grandma grew up in the 1930s and 40s in Wyoming, and western Kansas....same M.O. It is, what it is....

Just hard to understand from our perspective (I hope).... :doh!:

Mr. Flopnuts
11-29-2008, 10:28 PM
If you're a peanut guy, then wouldn't you want those who take the cashews and almods out to go first? By the time you get there, all that will be left will be the peanuts. First time I heard them called Brazil Nuts, I didn't know which ones they were. My mom always called them something else.

I live in liberal Seattle WA and I heard the non pc name for these nuts long before I knew their actual name. Not from my midwestern family either. No, it was the Californians that lived next door.

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:29 PM
Hidden? TinyE is clearly a racist.He's a PS3 extremist! He's got the robes and everything.

Did you notice that he's bald? Just last week he curb-stomped a young innocent 360 fan.

He's got to be stopped.

Mr. Flopnuts
11-29-2008, 10:29 PM
Jam a Brazil nut in a motherfucker's eye socket, and they will take notice.

LMAO

luv
11-29-2008, 10:30 PM
LMAO

Looks like you're getting caught up.

Mr. Flopnuts
11-29-2008, 10:31 PM
Looks like you're getting caught up.

I got a visual.

cdcox
11-29-2008, 10:32 PM
Don't even tell me that these family favorites aren't part of your regular menu?

Apple Brazil Nut Squares
Brazil and Cashew Nut Roast with Chestnut Stuffing
Brazil Nut and Cocoa Parfait
Brazil Nut Bark
Brazil Nut Bars
Brazil Nut Bread Pudding
Brazil Nut-Butterscotch Brownie
Brazil Nut Christmas Fruit Cake
Brazil Nut Cookies

Brazil Nut Corn Coated Pork
Brazil-Nut Date Cake
Brazil Nut Korma
Brazil Nut Mousse
Brazil Nut Torte
Brazilian Nut Crunch
Brigitte's Brazilian Nut Crunch
Buttered Brazil Nuts
Chicken in Shrimp and Almond Sauce with Brazil Nuts
Coconut Quindins with Brazil Nuts
New York Style Cheesecake with Brazil Nut Crust
Orange and Brazil Nut Loaf
Orange Brazil Nut Tart
Pappardelle with Rocket and Brazil Nut Pesto
Salad of Charred Brazil Nuts and Walnuts with Avocado
Soy-Brazil Nut Burgers
Spinach with Brazil Nut Topping
Torta De Castanha Do Para (Brazil Nut Cake)
Vatapa Fish Soup with Coconut Milk and Brazil Nuts
Wild and Brown Rice Salad with Roasted Brazil Nuts
Xim-Xim De Galinha

blueballs
11-29-2008, 10:33 PM
If you're into healthy eating
Brazil nuts are your friend -unsalted
lower cholestorol and keep you thin

Simply Red
11-29-2008, 10:34 PM
If you're into healthy eating
Brazil nuts are your friend -unsalted
lower cholestorol and keep you thin

are they good?

Mr. Flopnuts
11-29-2008, 10:36 PM
are they good?

Is it acceptable for a caucasian person to eat Brazilian nuts? I'd be curious to hear the opinions.

blueballs
11-29-2008, 10:38 PM
are they good?

nuts and seeds contain the good fats
oh -and are loaded with zinc
zinc puts the steel in your rod

blueballs
11-29-2008, 10:40 PM
it's the salt they load on them that make them bad for you

Ultra Peanut
11-29-2008, 10:40 PM
That one too.http://i35.tinypic.com/rk8vwy.gif

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:41 PM
Is it acceptable for a caucasian person to eat Brazilian nuts? I'd be curious to hear the opinions.If you call them "brazil nuts", why not?

I seriously used to think my grandma was a huge racist, because she called them that. Now I'm thinking it was just the common vernacular. I know it doesn't make it right, but it eases my mind a bit.

Rain Man
11-29-2008, 10:41 PM
You're like a video game version of James Bond. That's what I like about you.

Remind me to stay on your good side.


Interesting bit of trivia: during the Mau Mau Insurrection of the 1950s, the British tortured prisoners by putting a hard-boiled egg up between their legs and then forcing their legs together. Apparently the pressure on the sciatic nerve caused the prisoners to immediately offer up the requested information.

Presumably these were male prisoners. I'm not sure it would work on female prisoners since, well, the eggs would've mysteriously disappeared due to witchcraft or something.

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:42 PM
http://i35.tinypic.com/rk8vwy.gifLMAO

Go Mac.

Sweet karate moves.

KS Smitty
11-29-2008, 10:47 PM
Brazil nuts also known as a racially offensive toe are one of the most nuritious nuts readily available. They are high in selenium, copper and magnesium.

Baconeater
11-29-2008, 10:49 PM
I start every morning with a nice tall glass of magnesium.

blueballs
11-29-2008, 10:49 PM
good for the brain
which explains why they don't appeal to Tiny
ha ha

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:52 PM
Brazil nuts also known as a racially offensive toe are one of the most nuritious nuts readily available. They are high in selenium, copper and magnesium..

Baconeater
11-29-2008, 10:52 PM
.

,

Mr. Flopnuts
11-29-2008, 10:54 PM
If you call them "brazil nuts", why not?

I seriously used to think my grandma was a huge racist, because she called them that. Now I'm thinking it was just the common vernacular. I know it doesn't make it right, but it eases my mind a bit.

Cross thread humor.

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:55 PM
,I tried to attach a pic. Didn't work.

Meh, it wasn't that funny anyway.

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 10:55 PM
Cross thread humor.I clearly need to spend more time here.

(God help me)

Baconeater
11-29-2008, 10:56 PM
I clearly need to spend more time here.

(God help me)

It's at the top of the front page.

Simply Red
11-29-2008, 11:01 PM
Does anyone have anything before I head to bed?

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 11:04 PM
Does anyone have anything before I head to bed?What do you want?


Shall I dance for ya?

It aint pretty.

TinyEvel
11-29-2008, 11:07 PM
Bythway, my ballsack is about the size of a tennis ball.
Just sayin.
They should cal them TinyE nuts.

blueballs
11-29-2008, 11:09 PM
Midnight_douche grabs a handful of brazilian nuts
before straddling and revving his potent crotch rocket

TinyEvel
11-29-2008, 11:11 PM
Brazil nuts also known as a racially offensive toe are one of the most nuritious nuts readily available. They are high in selenium, copper and magnesium.

Yes, but how much Beryllium do they contain??

TinyEvel
11-29-2008, 11:13 PM
Introducing our mascot...MISTER BRAZILNUT!!!!!!

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 11:17 PM
Introducing our mascot...MISTER BRAZILNUT!!!!!!That girl's expression says it all. LMAO

Skip Towne
11-29-2008, 11:25 PM
Probably the same thing my mom always called them.

Is there a firework that is a cousin to them?

blueballs
11-29-2008, 11:28 PM
strange
I've heard a chocolate covered candy
called by that name

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 11:28 PM
Is there a firework that is a cousin to them?LMAO


I'm pretty sure there is. We called them "Whistlers", though.

TinyEvel
11-29-2008, 11:38 PM
You know, I started this thread because I was sincerely disappointed in this nut's inclusion to the "mixed nuts" bowl, and now it has brought up all kind of racist memories from all you Southern/Midwest people.

SHAME ON YOUR RACIST FAMILIES!!!!

I wanted to hate on a nut, not a race.

I'm sorry I ever started this thread. I'm MOVING TO CANADA!!!

(Or, maybe Amsterdam)

KcMizzou
11-29-2008, 11:49 PM
You know, I started this thread because I was sincerely disappointed in this nut's inclusion to the "mixed nuts" bowl, and now it has brought up all kind of racist memories from all you Southern/Midwest people.

SHAME ON YOUR RACIST FAMILIES!!!!

I wanted to hate on a nut, not a race.

I'm sorry I ever started this thread. I'm MOVING TO CANADA!!!

(Or, maybe Amsterdam).

Rain Man
11-29-2008, 11:51 PM
I read once that planting Brazil nut trees on your property boundaries can prevent attacks by hordes of howler monkeys. Sure enough, I have them in my yard and have never been attacked by a single howler monkey, much less a horde.

KcMizzou
11-30-2008, 12:02 AM
I read once that planting Brazil nut trees on your property boundaries can prevent attacks by hordes of howler monkeys. Sure enough, I have them in my yard and have never been attacked by a single howler monkey, much less a horde.My Grandpa used to say his pomeranian was an elephant dog, when i was a kid.

"You see any elephants around here?"

J Diddy
11-30-2008, 01:05 AM
brazil chicks dig em

BigMeatballDave
11-30-2008, 07:40 AM
I love Cashews.

penguinz
11-30-2008, 07:48 AM
A peanuts and cashews are not nuts!

BigMeatballDave
11-30-2008, 07:56 AM
A peanuts and cashews are not nuts!Why is a cashew not a nut?

penguinz
11-30-2008, 07:59 AM
Why is a cashew not a nut?Because it is a seed. It grows at the end of the cashew apple.

TinyEvel
11-30-2008, 08:13 AM
Isn't a nut a seed? Pine nuts seem like seeds. Or is it a legume?

We need to get to the bottom of this folks. Our holiday joy is in jeopardy.
and we'd better do it quick before this afternoon, when all the "We killed/blew-it versus the Raiders" threads will push the great nut debate onto page two.

Delano
11-30-2008, 08:20 AM
Isn't a nut a seed? Pine nuts seem like seeds. Or is it a legume?

We need to get to the bottom of this folks. Our holiday joy is in jeopardy.
and we'd better do it quick before this afternoon, when all the "We killed/blew-it versus the Raiders" threads will push the great nut debate onto page two.

Legumes are members of the Fabaceae family which includes the edible seeds: lentils, peanuts, peas, soybeans.

Legumes also include valuable forage crops like alfalfa and clover. Acacia trees are considered legumes.

Legume seeds are also called pulses.

penguinz
11-30-2008, 08:24 AM
Isn't a nut a seed? Pine nuts seem like seeds. Or is it a legume?

We need to get to the bottom of this folks. Our holiday joy is in jeopardy.
and we'd better do it quick before this afternoon, when all the "We killed/blew-it versus the Raiders" threads will push the great nut debate onto page two.All nuts are seeds, but not all seeds are nuts. Nuts are both the seed and the fruit, and cannot be separated. Seeds come from fruit, and can be removed from the fruit, like almonds, cashews and pistachios, which were once inside fruit.

Delano
11-30-2008, 08:25 AM
From Wikipedia:

The Brazil nut is a large tree, reaching 3045 metres (100150 ft) tall and 12 metres (36.5 ft) trunk diameter, among the largest of trees in the Amazon Rainforests (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amazon_Rainforest). It may live for 500 years or more, and according to some authorities often reaches an age of 1,000 years.

Despite their name, the most significant exporter of Brazil nuts is not Brazil but Bolivia, where they are called almendras (literally 'racially insensitive toes').

While cooks classify the Brazil nut as a nut (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nut_%28fruit%29), botanists consider it to be a seed (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seed) and not a nut, since in nuts the shell splits in half with the meat separate from the shell.

TinyEvel
12-02-2008, 12:40 AM
From Wikipedia:

While cooks classify the Brazil nut as a nut (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nut_%28fruit%29), botanists consider it to be a seed (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seed) and not a nut, since in nuts the shell splits in half with the meat separate from the shell.

PWNED!