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View Full Version : Life Military Folks: Describe a Captain.


Rain Man
03-17-2009, 10:52 PM
I was walking home tonight, and ended up walking next to a soldier as we crossed a street. He was in full battle dress with the camo and boots and stuff (though no gun or helmet or anything).

He looked at me and said hi. I said hi back.

Then he said, "Are you a captain?"

I said, "What?"

He said, "Are you a captain?"

I literally looked down to see what I was wearing, and it was nothing remotely military looking: khaki pants, half-dressy shoes, and a black fleece.

I said, "Like in the army?"

"Yeah."

"No. But why are you asking?"

He shrugged and said, "You just look like a captain."

So...what does a captain look like? Was he just marveling at my natural sense of heroism, along with the leadership I exude? Or are Captains smarmy little losers who get shot in the back the first time they lead their troops out of the trench?

And I'm 46 years old, and constantly reminded that I look older. Aren't captains younger? What does that mean?

If he said, "you look like a general", I could understand that it's probably a compliment, in that I look like I could lead large numbers of men in an invasion of Europe. But what is a captain, and is it good or bad?

Iowanian
03-17-2009, 10:53 PM
Captain Crunch, Captain Kangaroo......or if you were standing on a curb like pirate....Captain Morgan?

Were you wearing a silly hat and feather?
http://maureena.net/Images/Captain_Morgan1.JPG

KC Jones
03-17-2009, 10:53 PM
that's a code word for the don't ask don't tell policy

:evil:

Iowanian
03-17-2009, 10:55 PM
Maybe he was a spy and that was the code to find out if you had the secret document.


Do you look like Slugworth from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? He may have been trying to sell the forumla for the Everlasting Gobstopper.

http://www.geocities.com/tkbezerra/slugworth.jpg

DeezNutz
03-17-2009, 10:58 PM
Permission to board, captain?

http://www.strangerdangerdistro.com/misc_pics/butt_thumb.jpg

Donger
03-17-2009, 10:58 PM
What was his rank? Officer or enlisted man?

Donger
03-17-2009, 10:59 PM
It was probably Jay Cutler, BTW.

Rain Man
03-17-2009, 11:16 PM
What was his rank? Officer or enlisted man?

I meant to mention that. I think he was an enlisted man, but I'm not sure. He didn't have any insignia on his uniform.

Donger
03-17-2009, 11:23 PM
I meant to mention that. I think he was an enlisted man, but I'm not sure. He didn't have any insignia on his uniform.

Not even on his collar? Or his shoulder(s)?

badgirl
03-17-2009, 11:27 PM
Maybe he just left army surplus, maybe hes just delusional, pretending to be in the army. Therefore calling you Captain really means nothing.:hmmm:

Mr. Kotter
03-17-2009, 11:30 PM
Maybe they were Navy folks...a Captain in the Navy is almost a General in the Army. :hmmm:

jjjayb
03-18-2009, 01:10 AM
Were you dressed like this?

http://www.retroland.com/retroblog/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/revnorlnscover.jpg

Count Alex's Losses
03-18-2009, 01:15 AM
He was gay. "Are you a captain?" is gay code for "I want you to be on top."

If you were gay, and wanted to copulate, the appropriate response would be, "present your poop deck."

bdeg
03-18-2009, 01:20 AM
I'd guess he hasn't seen too many generals in his day. Captain is pretty respectable, you were probably wearing what a captain might wear out of uniform and looked confident.

Reaper16
03-18-2009, 01:21 AM
He was gay. "Are you a captain?" is gay code for "I want you to be on top."

If you were gay, and wanted to copulate, the appropriate response would be, "present your poop deck."
Parents: watch out for your kids sending text messages that read "AYAC?" or "PYPD."

XXXshogunXXX
03-18-2009, 02:00 AM
army captains are around 25-32 years old, O3. I doubt he meant that, unless you look like youre under 35.

Navy Captains, are like army colonels, around 40 - 50 years old. If he was in the army, I doubt thats what he was thinking.

He was probably reffering to something gay.

cdcox
03-18-2009, 02:06 AM
Navy Captains, are like army colonels, around 40 - 50 years old.

Rain Man, were you wearing Old Spice?

He was probably reffering to something gay.

Rain Man, were you wearing Old Spice?

T-post Tom
03-18-2009, 02:06 AM
Asking a stranger "Are you a captain?" is the same as cross-stall foot touching in public bathrooms. NTTIAWWT

Count Alex's Losses
03-18-2009, 02:11 AM
ARE YOU A CAPTAIN?

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OQJOqSI4X4c/SDbha-cVLhI/AAAAAAAADFI/-geLtTJEQWA/s400/sexy+sailors.jpg

XXXshogunXXX
03-18-2009, 02:27 AM
Rain Man, were you wearing Old Spice?



Rain Man, were you wearing Old Spice?

I mustve missed something, I dont get it.

Barret
03-18-2009, 02:42 AM
It sounds like the guy was just out of boot camp. If he didnt have any insignia or stripes on then he is a recruit or going to a costume party or something.

Also Shogun is correct, If you remember MASH, Honeycutt and Pierce were both Army Captains. They were always getting crapped on by Major Burns or Major Hotlips.

Navy Captain think of Hunt for Red October and Captain Ramius and the Captain of the USS Dallas. Both older but in charge of a lot more stuff.

TinyEvel
03-18-2009, 02:43 AM
That was either

1) he is ghey and that was some code for hooking up.
2) he remembered you as moderator of a Captain Morgan tag line focus group circa 2005.
3) He's a fan of Dead Poet's Society but flubbed the quote.


I'm guessing option 1. Unless, of course, you were wearing a cartoony blue hat and fake moustache, whereas the appropriate line should have been...Are you a Cap'n?

SCTrojan
03-18-2009, 07:59 AM
With the new Army Combat Uniform, it's difficult to see the rank. They don't wear anything on the collar, the rank insignia is placed square in the middle of the chest. With the new coloring, it tends to blend in.

As for him guessing you were a captain - it was probably the khakis and the black fleece. The black fleece coat can be worn with the uniform and doesn't require any insignia. A lot of folks wear it with civilian clothes, especially when they are traveling, since it saves on packing space - one coat for both in uniform and in civilian clothes. And khaki pants are almost an Army standard for officers in a casual setting.

Just a guess, though.