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bogey
05-04-2009, 12:41 PM
I'm 51 years young, I have a 25 year old here at work that wants to race me. I used to be REALLY fast. I haven't raced anyone for 25 years or more. I never, I repeat, never lost a race when I was younger. Everybody in the office is betting on the kid. In my mind, I'm still 25 and I think I can beat him. I'm going to take all bets from the office. I'll let you know how I do because I know you're very interested.
That is all.

Demonpenz
05-04-2009, 12:43 PM
been meaning to use my medical insurance anyways

Katipan
05-04-2009, 12:47 PM
What's the race? A 5K? A little lap around the parking lot? Does it involve office chairs and stairwells?

bogey
05-04-2009, 12:47 PM
The little bugger just came in to my office. I asked him when he wanted to race and he said "whenever you think it's best for your health". Now I'm getting a little concerned.

Jenson71
05-04-2009, 12:47 PM
I have a feeling we're going to be seeing a "Having surgery on my dislocated hip" thread in a couple of weeks.

bogey
05-04-2009, 12:48 PM
What's the race? A 5K? A little lap around the parking lot? Does it involve office chairs and stairwells?

Oh I should have said that. It's just a sprint. Probaly a 40 yard dash or something.

Katipan
05-04-2009, 12:49 PM
Oh I should have said that. It's just a sprint. Probaly a 40 yard dash or something.

O.k. I advise you to run as fast as you can until the finish.

bogey
05-04-2009, 12:49 PM
O.k. I advise you to run as fast as you can until the finish.

Got it.

Fish
05-04-2009, 12:51 PM
Have you considered doping?

Jenson71
05-04-2009, 12:54 PM
Crush a Flexeril into his coffee.

Or antifreeze.

Dicky McElephant
05-04-2009, 12:55 PM
Push him down when the race starts......and then jog to victory. Either that or go all Nancy Kerrigan and break his knee 10 minutes before the race.

Delano
05-04-2009, 12:55 PM
You should be able to cut .25 off your forty time if you pull your walker behind you instead of pushing it out front.

Fritz88
05-04-2009, 12:55 PM
The little bugger just came in to my office. I asked him when he wanted to race and he said "whenever you think it's best for your health". Now I'm getting a little concerned.

Sounds like a little DBag to me.

Do you think you can handle a sprint?

I think you may beat him if it involved running a longer distance.

If you have not run in a long time, I recommend you spend at least a month running every other day to build up your stamina and strength, then race the little bugger.

Rooster
05-04-2009, 12:56 PM
I just keep thinking of the Seinfeld episode when Jerry was in a foot race with a former classmate from his childhood.:)

bogey
05-04-2009, 12:57 PM
Have you considered doping?

Only on special occasions. I used to smoke dope all the time though.

bogey
05-04-2009, 12:58 PM
Push him down when the race starts......and then jog to victory. Either that or go all Nancy Kerrigan and break his knee 10 minutes before the race.

I'm considering a couple of false starts just to wear him down a little.

bogey
05-04-2009, 12:59 PM
You should be able to cut .25 off your forty time if you pull your walker behind you instead of pushing it out front.

yuck, yuck

Katipan
05-04-2009, 12:59 PM
Only on special occasions. I used to smoke dope all the time though.

This is pretty special... It's not like Carl Lewis is coming by to challenge you.

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:00 PM
Sounds like a little DBag to me.

Do you think you can handle a sprint?

I think you may beat him if it involved running a longer distance.

If you have not run in a long time, I recommend you spend at least a month running every other day to build up your stamina and strength, then race the little bugger.

This is going to happen today.

Fish
05-04-2009, 01:00 PM
Only on special occasions. I used to smoke dope all the time though.

:D

Not exactly the intended humor I was going for, but that works. Let me revise along your thought line: Offer the other kid some pot, I bet he'll forget about the race in search of jalapeno cheezits and you'll win on a forfeit.....

Dicky McElephant
05-04-2009, 01:01 PM
This is going to happen today.

You're fucked. Bring plenty of Ensure to the race. :D

Demonpenz
05-04-2009, 01:04 PM
Only on special occasions. I used to smoke dope all the time though.

40 yard hash

seclark
05-04-2009, 01:04 PM
beware:

DeezNutz
05-04-2009, 01:06 PM
Eat something spicy and make sure you're running toward the nearest entrance to your office.

It will be just like you're at home. Muscle memory will kick in.

Fat Elvis
05-04-2009, 01:07 PM
I'm 51 years young, I have a 25 year old here at work that wants to race me. I used to be REALLY fast. I haven't raced anyone for 25 years or more. I never, I repeat, never lost a race when I was younger. Everybody in the office is betting on the kid. In my mind, I'm still 25 and I think I can beat him. I'm going to take all bets from the office. I'll let you know how I do because I know you're very interested.
That is all.


Do you know how I know you are gay?

Because you are Carl Lewis.

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:10 PM
:D

Not exactly the intended humor I was going for, but that works. Let me revise along your thought line: Offer the other kid some pot, I bet he'll forget about the race in search of jalapeno cheezits and you'll win on a forfeit.....

I got it. Just trying some old school humor.

Rain Man
05-04-2009, 01:12 PM
It's always a bad idea to make race an issue in the workplace.

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:12 PM
beware:

I'm going to stretch before I race him.

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:19 PM
It's always a bad idea to make race an issue in the workplace.

He is a hispanic guy.

Fat Elvis
05-04-2009, 01:27 PM
If it has been 25 years since you've raced anyone, you might want to run the 40 yards and then throw up on his shoes.

Coogs
05-04-2009, 01:28 PM
Anybody see Rich Eisen run the 40 at the combine? And then when it was super-imposed vs some of the football players? That is what I am seeing in my mind.

BTW bogey, I am 52. Kick this dudes azz for us oldtimers! :toast:

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:31 PM
If it has been 25 years since you've raced anyone, you might want to run the 40 yards and then throw up on his shoes.

If it was some kind of a long distance race, I would be screwed, but come on, 40 yards? Even I can run 40 yards as long as there's a marlboro waiting for me at the end.

Pablo
05-04-2009, 01:36 PM
He is a hispanic guy.Pay some co-workers to dress up in INS gear and then pop out about halfway through your race and stand at the predetermined end point. Flawless victory on your part.

Katipan
05-04-2009, 01:37 PM
This could be a great show concept for SPIKE.

Rain Man
05-04-2009, 01:40 PM
If it was some kind of a long distance race, I would be screwed, but come on, 40 yards? Even I can run 40 yards as long as there's a marlboro waiting for me at the end.


Be sure to light one up at the starting blocks. The only thing more humiliating than losing a race to a guy twice your age is to lose when he's running the race with a cigarette in his mouth.

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:41 PM
He raced 2 other guys here last week. He smoked one of them and barely beat the other. The one he barely beat is a skinny little guy. The one he smoked is in his early 30's.

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:42 PM
Be sure to light one up at the starting blocks. The only thing more humiliating than losing a race to a guy twice your age is to lose when he's running the race with a cigarette in his mouth.

I was planning on smoking one just before we race. It's only 40 yards.

Rooster
05-04-2009, 01:48 PM
You guys should race with flippers on just to make it interesting.

Rain Man
05-04-2009, 01:50 PM
I was planning on smoking one just before we race. It's only 40 yards.


No, during. Or at least be holding it while you run. It'd be great taunting material if you win, and it'd be an excuse if you lose.

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:55 PM
You guys should race with flippers on just to make it interesting.

:)

bogey
05-04-2009, 01:55 PM
No, during. Or at least be holding it while you run. It'd be great taunting material if you win, and it'd be an excuse if you lose.

Very good point.

Gonzo
05-04-2009, 02:14 PM
http://www.richardcorman.com/images/special_olympics_001.jpg

Iowanian
05-04-2009, 02:15 PM
Don't pop a hammy.

bogey
05-04-2009, 02:17 PM
http://www.richardcorman.com/images/special_olympics_001.jpg

I don't wear glasses.

ziggysocki
05-04-2009, 02:19 PM
Make sure to let him win, he will take way more shit for beating an old guy... other dudes in the office will be like, "WOW! Now you should challenge the six year old girl at the daycare across the street."

Coogs
05-04-2009, 02:22 PM
Here is the Rich Eisen 40 video. This is funny as heck. And sorry bogey, this is what is running through my mind. :shrug:

http://www.steelersdepot.com/blog/2009/02/rich-eisen-40-yard-dash/

Mr. Flopnuts
05-04-2009, 02:25 PM
No offense dude, but my money is on the kid.

DeezNutz
05-04-2009, 02:31 PM
Is this event going to be up on YouTube soon?

Infidel Goat
05-04-2009, 02:38 PM
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Seriously, though, just channel your best Willie Gault:

Willie Gault at 48 (http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/news?slug=li-gault050109)

and good luck...

bogey
05-04-2009, 02:42 PM
No offense dude, but my money is on the kid.

No offense taken. How much money?

RJ
05-04-2009, 02:59 PM
Be sure to light one up at the starting blocks. The only thing more humiliating than losing a race to a guy twice your age is to lose when he's running the race with a cigarette in his mouth.


And a can of beer in his hand, never spilling a drop.

Rain Man
05-04-2009, 03:05 PM
Here is the Rich Eisen 40 video. This is funny as heck. And sorry bogey, this is what is running through my mind. :shrug:

http://www.steelersdepot.com/blog/2009/02/rich-eisen-40-yard-dash/


Wow. The simulcast thing is amazing.

warrior
05-04-2009, 03:12 PM
40 yard hash

Nice ROFL

Skip Towne
05-04-2009, 03:16 PM
I'm betting on the kid. I'm 64 and can't run anymore. It's just kind of a controlled stumble

Mr. Flopnuts
05-04-2009, 03:27 PM
No offense taken. How much money?

If I bet you, I would have to root against you. Not only that, but I don't know nearly enough about either one of you. I'm basing my prediction purely on physics. I hope you come back and serve me up a shit sammy. I'll be pulling for you.

Skip Towne
05-04-2009, 03:32 PM
When is post time?

Fritz88
05-04-2009, 03:35 PM
This could be a great show concept for SPIKE.

I am not being sarcastic but you may want to pitch that to them, it might just work.

rockymtnchief
05-04-2009, 03:37 PM
I'm going to stretch before I race him.

I used to run a 4.65 and I was curious if I still could. So I went straight to the track and ran a 5.05. A week later I decided to warm up first and ran a 4.84. So warm up and get limber, THEN stretch and race. You'll be a lot faster and risk less injury. Ride a bike or jog/sprint for 20 minutes first. Good luck!:thumb:

seclark
05-04-2009, 03:41 PM
have you raced the young whipersnapper yet, bogey?
sec

Fritz88
05-04-2009, 03:45 PM
I used to run a 4.65 and I was curious if I still could. So I went straight to the track and ran a 5.05. A week later I decided to warm up first and ran a 4.84. So warm up and get limber, THEN stretch and race. You'll be a lot faster and risk less injury. Ride a bike or jog/sprint for 20 minutes first. Good luck!:thumb:

You are right. Many people have the misconception that they need to stretch before they do intense activities. While stretching is important, getting a little warm up (5-10 min of mild jogging until some sweat starts to come on your forehead) then stretch.

rockymtnchief
05-04-2009, 03:54 PM
You are right. Many people have the misconception that they need to stretch before they do intense activities. While stretching is important, getting a little warm up (5-10 min of mild jogging until some sweat starts to come on your forehead) then stretch.

I feel age catching up to me. I need at least 20 minutes of riding on flat terrain before I can hit the mountains on my bike. I used to just get out and take off. Not anymore. Same with running. I'll walk 20 minutes at a fast pace before I even try to run.

damaticous
05-04-2009, 04:00 PM
First with the Seinfeld reference. :)

Fritz88
05-04-2009, 04:09 PM
I feel age catching up to me. I need at least 20 minutes of riding on flat terrain before I can hit the mountains on my bike. I used to just get out and take off. Not anymore. Same with running. I'll walk 20 minutes at a fast pace before I even try to run.

As long as you sweat it, it will have positive effect on your body. Just get out and exercise.

You are doing just that.

bogey
05-04-2009, 06:13 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I won. I am quite sure I pulled a muscle in the back of my right leg, and some kind of muscle in my stomach. But I absolutely beat the whipper snapper. I had a good start, and held the lead throughout. There was so much hype built up before the race happened that we had an audience. 51 is the new 21 mother fuckers! He was a good loser. I feel good, except for the torn muscles.

Donger
05-04-2009, 06:15 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I won. I am quite sure I pulled a muscle in the back of my right leg, and some kind of muscle in my stomach. But I absolutely beat the whipper snapper. I had a good start, and held the lead throughout. There was so much hype built up before the race happened that we had an audience. 51 is the new 21 mother ****ers! He was a good loser. I feel good, except for the torn muscles.

You went Tonya Harding on him?

bogey
05-04-2009, 06:22 PM
You went Tonya Harding on him?

I did do one false start. But it was accidental.

rockymtnchief
05-04-2009, 06:22 PM
Good job ya ole bastard!

bogey
05-04-2009, 06:28 PM
Good job ya ole bastard!

If it wasn't for my bad back, weak stomach muscles, high cholesterol, pulled leg muscle and gray hair, I'd be hot shit.

WilliamTheIrish
05-04-2009, 06:37 PM
When is post time?

LMAO

I'm hearing the sound of the trumpet that calls the horses before the Derby.

Infidel Goat
05-04-2009, 07:10 PM
First with the Seinfeld reference. :)

Post #49. :p

Delano
05-04-2009, 07:42 PM
If it wasn't for my bad back, weak stomach muscles, high cholesterol, pulled leg muscle and gray hair, I'd be hot shit.

Don't forget the whistle when you talk. :p

Rain Man
05-04-2009, 07:43 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I won. I am quite sure I pulled a muscle in the back of my right leg, and some kind of muscle in my stomach. But I absolutely beat the whipper snapper. I had a good start, and held the lead throughout. There was so much hype built up before the race happened that we had an audience. 51 is the new 21 mother ****ers! He was a good loser. I feel good, except for the torn muscles.


Awesome! Did you have the cigarette in your mouth? Please tell me you had the cigarette in your mouth.

stlchiefs
05-04-2009, 07:51 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I won. I am quite sure I pulled a muscle in the back of my right leg, and some kind of muscle in my stomach. But I absolutely beat the whipper snapper. I had a good start, and held the lead throughout. There was so much hype built up before the race happened that we had an audience. 51 is the new 21 mother ****ers! He was a good loser. I feel good, except for the torn muscles.

Congrats old man. :clap:

JimNasium
05-04-2009, 08:30 PM
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Infidel Goat
05-04-2009, 09:13 PM
You went Tonya Harding on him?

One of my (female) co-workers once conflated Tonya Harding and Tara Lipinski. I now try to ridicule her as much as possible for it. She's a Mavs fan so I told her this morning that the Mavs couldn't win unless she went Tara Lipinski on Carmelo Anthony...

Coogs
05-04-2009, 11:14 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I won. I am quite sure I pulled a muscle in the back of my right leg, and some kind of muscle in my stomach. But I absolutely beat the whipper snapper. I had a good start, and held the lead throughout. There was so much hype built up before the race happened that we had an audience. 51 is the new 21 mother fuckers! He was a good loser. I feel good, except for the torn muscles.

:toast:

Damn. I am impressed.

Coogs
05-05-2009, 09:00 AM
Are you sore this AM?

Even if you are, I would guess you are probably still feeling pretty good.

seclark
05-05-2009, 09:19 AM
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I won. I am quite sure I pulled a muscle in the back of my right leg, and some kind of muscle in my stomach. But I absolutely beat the whipper snapper. I had a good start, and held the lead throughout. There was so much hype built up before the race happened that we had an audience. 51 is the new 21 mother ****ers! He was a good loser. I feel good, except for the torn muscles.

congrats, but i warned you.

bogey
05-05-2009, 11:54 AM
Don't forget the whistle when you talk. :p


That right there is some funny shit.

bogey
05-05-2009, 11:58 AM
Awesome! Did you have the cigarette in your mouth? Please tell me you had the cigarette in your mouth.

I'm so sorry, I did not. I took this race seriously. The kid had pizza delivered before the race. He said he might have a piece while he was running. I made him race before he had lunch.

bogey
05-05-2009, 12:00 PM
<object width="512" height="296"><param name="movie" value="http://www.hulu.com/embed/y-mNDkWeqvTW4FZOCSsPmQ"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.hulu.com/embed/y-mNDkWeqvTW4FZOCSsPmQ" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowFullScreen="true" width="512" height="296"></embed></object>

I wish I could figure out how to see this.

kepp
05-05-2009, 12:00 PM
How many stripes did your shoes have?

bogey
05-05-2009, 12:07 PM
Are you sore this AM?

Even if you are, I would guess you are probably still feeling pretty good.

I am sore. And yes, people are coming in to the office and congratulating me. Honestly, I'm loving it.

bogey
05-05-2009, 12:08 PM
congrats, but i warned you.

I know, I know.

Monty
05-05-2009, 02:01 PM
I'm so sorry, I did not. I took this race seriously. The kid had pizza delivered before the race. He said he might have a piece while he was running. I made him race before he had lunch.

So, he had your ass as an appetizer..... ROFL

Well done!!

bogey
05-05-2009, 02:13 PM
So, he had your ass as an appetizer..... ROFL

Well done!!


I handed him his ass as a hors d'oeuvres.

Rooster
05-05-2009, 02:25 PM
I am sore. And yes, people are coming in to the office and congratulating me. Honestly, I'm loving it.

:clap: That's awesome bogey. Way to go! :D