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View Full Version : Poop I swallowed the tab on my soda...


rambleonthruthefog
06-06-2009, 01:08 PM
my soda was hard to open so i had to fidget with the tab quite a bit. the soda opened and the tab fell in. i didn't think anything of it until i accidentaly swallowed it. what should i do?

am i gonna die?

kstater
06-06-2009, 01:11 PM
/http://mahopa.de/bilder/lustige-forenbilder/sit-in-the-corner-dumbass.jpg

milkman
06-06-2009, 01:20 PM
I've heard anti-freeze will resolve the tab in the stomach issue.

Buehler445
06-06-2009, 01:22 PM
http://www.theboxset.com/images/reviewcaptures/612capture_tombstone03.jpg

the Talking Can
06-06-2009, 01:23 PM
it will slice an opening the length of your intestine, but otherwise, you're fine....

Fairplay
06-06-2009, 01:24 PM
Dissect your poop the next two bowel movements, Poop on a paper towel. It should all be out eventually..

kstater
06-06-2009, 01:24 PM
Actually, I retract my previous post. You're brilliant. You now have the basis for a lawsuit against the makers of the soda company. Go get you some free money.

MagicHef
06-06-2009, 01:43 PM
Just drink some mercury.

Mercury readily combines with aluminium to form a mercury-aluminium amalgam when the two pure metals come into contact. However, when the amalgam is exposed to air, the aluminium oxidizes, leaving behind mercury. The oxide flakes away, exposing more mercury amalgam, which repeats the process. This process continues until the supply of amalgam is exhausted, and since it releases mercury, a small amount of mercury can “eat through” a large amount of aluminium over time, by progressively forming amalgam and relinquishing the aluminium as oxide.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercury_(element)

DaFace
06-06-2009, 01:48 PM
I'd definitely be calling your doctor at least. That could do some pretty bad things to your GI tract I'd think.

Mr. Krab
06-06-2009, 01:49 PM
http://img181.imageshack.us/img181/4345/morans.jpg

rambleonthruthefog
06-06-2009, 01:53 PM
I'd definitely be calling your doctor at least. That could do some pretty bad things to your GI tract I'd think.

our friend is a dr. he said that bout 90% of foreign objects swallowed, pass. Even more if there are no sharp or rough edges. he said i'd most likely be just fine, but recommended that i go to the ER anyway. i'm gonna count on luck and mineral oil instead. but by all means, please continue to make fun of me.

StcChief
06-06-2009, 01:54 PM
smooth move....Ex-Lax.

Just Passin' By
06-06-2009, 01:56 PM
our friend is a dr. he said that bout 90% of foreign objects swallowed, pass. Even more if there are no sharp or rough edges. he said i'd most likely be just fine, but recommended that i go to the ER anyway. i'm gonna count on luck and mineral oil instead. but by all means, please continue to make fun of me.

Don't you watch House? This could lead to any number of problems resulting in multiple cardiac arrests. If you don't get to a hospital that has a curmudgeon for a diagnostician, you could be in real trouble.

wild1
06-06-2009, 02:07 PM
Finger in the throat ought to fix it.

BigVE
06-06-2009, 02:08 PM
Despite the warnings I never really thought this ever happened to real people. Dang.

Pants
06-06-2009, 02:13 PM
Could cause appendicitis, I would think.

Mr. Krab
06-06-2009, 02:14 PM
Despite the warnings I never really thought this ever happened to real people. Dang.
Never doubt the human condition.

http://addictedtostupidity.com/_wizardimages/stupidity.jpg

Spicy McHaggis
06-06-2009, 02:20 PM
I know life is hard sometimes, but this too shall pass.

DeezNutz
06-06-2009, 02:47 PM
Spitters are quitters. I applaud you for not giving up on the soda.

(eat some bread)

Zebedee DuBois
06-06-2009, 02:53 PM
Don't waste money on visits to the doctor or hospital.

Go down to the airport and get them to let you lay on the carry-on baggage inspector's conveyor belt. The inspector can tell you the progress of the tab.

Oh..don't forget to remove your shoes.

Ultra Peanut
06-06-2009, 03:08 PM
he said i'd most likely be just fine, but recommended that i go to the ER anyway. i'm gonna count on luck and mineral oil instead.AMERICAN HEALTH CARE SYSTEM

Bowser
06-06-2009, 03:13 PM
Are we to assume that you spill coffee from McDonalds on your crotch on a regular basis as well, despite the WARNING - COFFEE IS HOT! stickers everytwhere?

Mecca
06-06-2009, 03:13 PM
This is what we call natural selection.

prhom
06-06-2009, 03:27 PM
You'll probably make it. When I was 5 I swallowed a jack (like the old game of jacks) and didn't tell anyone because I was scared they would cut me open to get it out. I'm 28 now and haven't died yet. Still, I'm curious why you didn't pour out the soda and drink it from a glass? Sometimes when I open a glass beer bottle the neck breaks and gets glass in the beer. Has that ever happened to you? If if does, I would recommend just throwing that beer away.

rambleonthruthefog
06-06-2009, 03:30 PM
You'll probably make it. When I was 5 I swallowed a jack (like the old game of jacks) and didn't tell anyone because I was scared they would cut me open to get it out. I'm 28 now and haven't died yet. Still, I'm curious why you didn't pour out the soda and drink it from a glass? Sometimes when I open a glass beer bottle the neck breaks and gets glass in the beer. Has that ever happened to you? If if does, I would recommend just throwing that beer away.

i was driving when it happened. i said F it, surely i wont swallow it. its very unlike me to do something so stupid, but there ya have it.

Ari Chi3fs
06-06-2009, 03:31 PM
Perhaps we should sticky this thread? Ill miss you, whoever you are.

Mecca
06-06-2009, 03:35 PM
You break glass beer bottles opening them? What the fuck kinda technique do you use a hammer?

KCChiefsMan
06-06-2009, 03:42 PM
he said i'd most likely be just fine, but recommended that i go to the ER anyway.

he recommended that you go to the ER while you were already at the DRs? He must get a cut of the min. $3,000 visit to the ER.

prhom
06-06-2009, 03:43 PM
You break glass beer bottles opening them? What the **** kinda technique do you use a hammer?

It's pretty rare, but it usually seems to happen to microbrews that need a bottle opener. I think the bottles have been slightly damaged in transit, and then the force of the bottle opener just finishes it off. That's never happened to you? Do you normally drink out of cans or twist tops? That may explain it right there. I've probably had three or four bottles do this to me.

prhom
06-06-2009, 03:44 PM
i was driving when it happened. i said F it, surely i wont swallow it. its very unlike me to do something so stupid, but there ya have it.

I probably would have done the same thing if I was driving. Hope you pull through.

JuicesFlowing
06-06-2009, 04:17 PM
Don't you watch House? This could lead to any number of problems resulting in multiple cardiac arrests. If you don't get to a hospital that has a curmudgeon for a diagnostician, you could be in real trouble.

At least it's not Lupus ...?

Baconeater
06-06-2009, 04:19 PM
please continue to make fun of me.
Idiot.

Buck
06-06-2009, 04:21 PM
what kind of soda was it?

Mecca
06-06-2009, 04:30 PM
what kind of soda was it?

Tab.

DeezNutz
06-06-2009, 04:33 PM
Tab.

http://magicmanrusty.com/embed/martymcfly.jpg

kstater
06-06-2009, 04:37 PM
It's pretty rare, but it usually seems to happen to microbrews that need a bottle opener. I think the bottles have been slightly damaged in transit, and then the force of the bottle opener just finishes it off. That's never happened to you? Do you normally drink out of cans or twist tops? That may explain it right there. I've probably had three or four bottles do this to me.

You must be doing it wrong. I've never broken a bottle opening it. I almost exclusively drink non-twist off bottled beer. The fact that you've done it multiple times leads me to believe that you are in fact not bright enough to drink beer.

Pants
06-06-2009, 04:46 PM
Hope you pull through.

LMAO

Bwana
06-06-2009, 04:53 PM
.

Coach
06-06-2009, 05:03 PM
Despite the warnings I never really thought this ever happened to real people. Dang.

The way our society is right now, nothing ceases to suprise me. People "accidently" swallowing a pop tab? Check.

cabletech94
06-06-2009, 05:13 PM
Is there an AIDS tree around where you live.
I recommend running into it multiple times.
That should knock everything loose.

Rain Man
06-06-2009, 06:19 PM
There was a scientist in the old days who proved the concept of digestion by tying meat to a string, swallowing the meat, and then pulling it up later to show that the meat had been partially digested. Did you by any chance have a string tied to the tab?

Fairplay
06-06-2009, 06:23 PM
Tell us if your die so we can post a sticky.

Raised On Riots
06-06-2009, 06:24 PM
Actually, I retract my previous post. You're brilliant. You now have the basis for a lawsuit against the makers of the soda company. Go get you some free money.

Best post in the thread. Legitimate, plausible; go get that bread, Fred.

Ultra Peanut
06-06-2009, 06:25 PM
At least it's not Lupus ...?Stop deflecting. It's never lupus.

Fish
06-06-2009, 06:30 PM
Just another way that soda will fucking kill you......

Raised On Riots
06-06-2009, 06:39 PM
Just another way that soda will fucking kill you......

If I could walk about with a Dr. Pepper IV, I would.

Because it's "good".

Fish
06-06-2009, 07:12 PM
If I could walk about with a Dr. Pepper IV, I would.

Because it's "good".

A Dr. Pepper IV would be the death of you in no time. It's so damn acidic it's a wonder it doesn't eat through the cans and bottles before you can drink it... It has a pH of 2.9. 2.9! That's as bad as 12oz. of vinegar. Does that sound appealing? The only reason it doesn't taste like vinegar is because it has nearly 10 tsp of sugar in every can. 10 tsp of sugar is bad enough one it's own...

For reference, battery acid has a pH of 1.0.

Of course this does explain most of your posting habits....

Raised On Riots
06-06-2009, 07:14 PM
A Dr. Pepper IV would be the death of you in no time. It's so damn acidic it's a wonder it doesn't eat through the cans and bottles before you can drink it... It has a pH of 2.9. 2.9! That's as bad as 12oz. of vinegar. Does that sound appealing? The only reason it doesn't taste like vinegar is because it has nearly 10 tsp of sugar in every can. 10 tsp of sugar is bad enough one it's own...

For reference, battery acid has a pH of 1.0.

Of course this does explain most of your posting habits....

LMAO

Damn you Fish; you will PAY FOR YOUR INSOLENCE!!!

88TG88
06-06-2009, 08:23 PM
lol

good one

Rain Man
06-06-2009, 08:44 PM
I'm in the mood for a Dr. Pepper now.

Raised On Riots
06-06-2009, 08:46 PM
You can't deny Pepper-Power.

cdcox
06-06-2009, 09:59 PM
A Dr. Pepper IV would be the death of you in no time. It's so damn acidic it's a wonder it doesn't eat through the cans and bottles before you can drink it... It has a pH of 2.9. 2.9! That's as bad as 12oz. of vinegar. Does that sound appealing? The only reason it doesn't taste like vinegar is because it has nearly 10 tsp of sugar in every can. 10 tsp of sugar is bad enough one it's own...

For reference, battery acid has a pH of 1.0.

Of course this does explain most of your posting habits....

You do realize that the pH scale is a log scale and that means Dr. Pepper is only 1/100th as acidic as battery acid.

Iowanian
06-06-2009, 10:02 PM
You'll know when it passes.


As the tap pops through your rusty sheriff badge, it'll make the "pssssssssssssst" sound of an opening generic cola can.


Drinking enough coke might disolve it................it'll clean a dirty battery cable.

cdcox
06-06-2009, 10:04 PM
I'm amazed that some one 1) couldn't open a soda without breaking off the tab, 2) couldn't avoid dropping it into the soda and 3) couldn't avoid swallowing it. Congratulations on the trifecta.

cabletech94
06-06-2009, 10:36 PM
I'm amazed that some one 1) couldn't open a soda without breaking off the tab, 2) couldn't avoid dropping it into the soda and 3) couldn't avoid swallowing it. Congratulations on the trifecta.

Best post of this thread.


That's it everybody. Thread is done!

cdcox wins.

Good night!!!!!

Demonpenz
06-06-2009, 11:27 PM
don't die plz we got to many sticky's

Raised On Riots
06-06-2009, 11:35 PM
don't die plz we got to many sticky's


LMAO

rambleonthruthefog
06-07-2009, 12:43 AM
I'm amazed that some one 1) couldn't open a soda without breaking off the tab, 2) couldn't avoid dropping it into the soda and 3) couldn't avoid swallowing it. Congratulations on the trifecta.

i'm not proud:doh!:

pr_capone
06-07-2009, 01:07 AM
So did you pass the tab or are you bleeding out of your ass?

rambleonthruthefog
06-07-2009, 01:31 AM
So did you pass the tab or are you bleeding out of your ass?

update coming soon!

Pioli Zombie
06-07-2009, 07:49 AM
Drugs or Alcohol must have been involved. You have to notice you are doing this in time to gag it up unless you are hammered or you have the throat opening the size of Monica Lewinsky or George Michael.
Posted via Mobile Device

rambleonthruthefog
06-07-2009, 09:47 AM
done and done. got rid of that puppy on my first "try".:thumb:
this ought to be a better day. Next time i do something this f'n stupid i'll be sure to post it so you people can get a few more cheap laughs.

Baby Lee
06-07-2009, 09:58 AM
done and done. got rid of that puppy on my first "try".:thumb:
this ought to be a better day. Next time i do something this f'n stupid i'll be sure to post it so you people can get a few more cheap laughs.

No one told you that tab had been dipped in CancerAIDSAutoeroticasphyxiation?

Skip Towne
06-07-2009, 10:09 AM
done and done. got rid of that puppy on my first "try".:thumb:
this ought to be a better day. Next time i do something this f'n stupid i'll be sure to post it so you people can get a few more cheap laughs.

We appreciate it

Rain Man
06-07-2009, 02:17 PM
At least you didn't end up hanging in Bangkok with a rope around your genitals. That would be much more embarrassing.

Fairplay
06-08-2009, 08:54 AM
At least you didn't end up hanging in Bangkok with a rope around your genitals. That would be much more embarrassing.

That is messed up. I think foul play is involved. Lets get of our CSI units from tv over there ASAP.


Reminds me Michael Hutchence. I liked their music. But now even the songs remind you of his death a little. So sad.

penguinz
06-08-2009, 10:23 AM
Let this be a lesson that you should not put that crap in your body to begin with. Switch to water and you will be much happier. ;)

Fish
06-08-2009, 11:53 AM
You do realize that the pH scale is a log scale and that means Dr. Pepper is only 1/100th as acidic as battery acid.

Yes I understand that. And the fact that Dr. Pepper is over 100,000 times more acidic than water doesn't make it sound any better...

100,000 times more acidic than water, but only 1/100 as acidic as battery acid. Mmmmmm...

Terrible for you.....

Fairplay
06-08-2009, 12:50 PM
Some needs to swallow a AA battery or something. Then post that you just did it.

Then we take guesses what time it comes out the other end. That would be a fun contest. Full of suspense and drama.

Winner gets bragging rights.

cdcox
06-08-2009, 12:57 PM
Yes I understand that. And the fact that Dr. Pepper is over 100,000 times more acidic than water doesn't make it sound any better...

100,000 times more acidic than water, but only 1/100 as acidic as battery acid. Mmmmmm...

Terrible for you.....

The pH of the stomach can be as low as 1.0. At that pH neither of the major weak acids in soda (phosphoric or carbonic) add any significant acidity to your stomach, since they won't ionize to contribute a proton.

I'm not a soda drinker (maybe one a month) but I avoid them due to the empty calories, not the acidity.

Fish
06-08-2009, 01:39 PM
The pH of the stomach can be as low as 1.0. At that pH neither of the major weak acids in soda (phosphoric or carbonic) add any significant acidity to your stomach, since they won't ionize to contribute a proton.

I'm not a soda drinker (maybe one a month) but I avoid them due to the empty calories, not the acidity.

And that stomach acid is confined to the gastrointestinal tract for a reason. Hence the damage and extreme pain of a stomach ulcer when that stomach acid gets into any place other than the stomach. The problem isn't the acid from the soda being in your stomach, it's the fact that it courses through the rest of your body first and is absorbed by the body along the way.

Did you know that when our body pH is acidic, it promotes illness and poor health? Acidic pH level in human body fluids are prime environment for bacteria, virus, other undesirable menace and even cancer cells to grow.

While almost everything we do ,including our life style and our diets contributes to our body acidity, the long term effects of soda are devastating to our body. In fact it take 32 glasses of alkaline water at a pH of 9 to neutralize acid from one 12 oz. cola or soda. When you drink sodas, the body will use its own stored alkaline buffers which are mainly calcium from the bones and DNA to raise the body's alkalinity levels, especially to maintain proper blood alkaline pH levels. Acidic blood levels can cause death!

Scientists and doctors have found tht over 150 degenerative diseases are linked to acidity, including cancer, diabetes, arthritis, heart disease, gall and kidney stones,osteoporosis, hypertension, memory loss and many more. All diseases thrive in an acidic, oxygen poor environment.

Acidity, sugars and artificial sweetners can shorten life. Acidosis, lack of nutrients (minerals and vitamins), poor diets and improper digestion contributes to most degenerative diseases. Doctors have found degenerative diseases like osteoporosis, diabetes, arthritis...etc., in younger age group than before.

tooge
06-08-2009, 02:09 PM
stick your finger up your ass. If you dont feel anything, then stick your finger down your throat, or, maybe its the other way around. Oh, well, I forget. Just stick your finger up your wife/girfreinds ass.