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View Full Version : Movies and TV Who's the 21'st President?!?!


notorious
06-21-2009, 04:23 AM
Who's the 21st President?!?!


Go F%$@ yourself!

Die Hard With a Vengeance 1994

Post your favorite movie lines.

notorious
06-21-2009, 04:27 AM
The Last Boyscout is the opitmay of movie quotes IMHO.

pr_capone
06-21-2009, 04:29 AM
Now you know this don't look natural Coach. now you know it don't... I look like I just jacked off an elephant.

Smed1065
06-21-2009, 04:30 AM
Replace this thread?

Smed1065
06-21-2009, 04:32 AM
Round up the usual suspects!

crazycoffey
06-21-2009, 04:36 AM
Brooks was here
so was Red

Smed1065
06-21-2009, 04:38 AM
Get 1 right first, Oh LOL

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 05:30 AM
Brooks was here
so was Red

"Red was here"

Can be found embroidered on all his granddaughters underwear.
Posted via Mobile Device

Slainte
06-21-2009, 05:46 AM
I know you gentlemen have been through a lot, but when you find the time, I'd rather not spend the rest of this winter TIED TO THIS FUCKING COUCH!

Crush
06-21-2009, 06:18 AM
Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

crazycoffey
06-21-2009, 06:26 AM
"Red was here"

Can be found embroidered on all his granddaughters underwear.
Posted via Mobile Device

It was "Brooks was here" and "so was Red", but I get the joke (don't blast me baby poo.....)

crazycoffey
06-21-2009, 06:27 AM
Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

Animal house

"forget it, he's on a roll....."

Smed1065
06-21-2009, 06:37 AM
He didn't have my lawyer.

crazycoffey
06-21-2009, 06:44 AM
why am I here? my lawyer fucked me! We're all innocent, didn't you know that?

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 06:52 AM
Who knew she had a brain to damage? I should have pushed her from a higher floor.

The great Christopher Walken in Batman Returns.
Posted via Mobile Device

Smed1065
06-21-2009, 06:54 AM
why am I here? my lawyer fucked me! We're all innocent, didn't you know that?

See previous post............

LOL Its a system.

Smed1065
06-21-2009, 06:56 AM
why am I here? my lawyer fucked me! We're all innocent, didn't you know that?

America now?

Stirring shit!!!!!!

Surprise.

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 06:59 AM
Sell crazy somewhere else. We're all stocked up.
Posted via Mobile Device

crazycoffey
06-21-2009, 07:01 AM
See previous post............

LOL Its a system.

America now?

Stirring shit!!!!!!

Surprise.

perhaps you lost me; I thought I had your first "previous" quote just misquoted. I only tried to right that ship. I didn't know the ship was the Titantic......

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 07:05 AM
I once had a daycare provider ask if it was ok if my kids watch Titanic. Yeah sure, show my 5 year old people screaming and drowning for 2 hours. Brilliant.
Posted via Mobile Device

crazycoffey
06-21-2009, 07:23 AM
I once had a daycare provider ask if it was ok if my kids watch Titanic. Yeah sure, show my 5 year old people screaming and drowning for 2 hours. Brilliant.
Posted via Mobile Device

Like Bambi is so much better....

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 07:28 AM
Like Bambi is so much better....

Bambi is nothing now. You hear a shot. Mufasa dying in Lion King is much worse. And you're comparing Bambi to Titanic? If Bambis mom was shown screaming and yelling while she was drowning and then 200 other dear were seen being sent to a slow freezing death in the Atlantic for a couple of hours well sure ok.
Posted via Mobile Device

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 07:29 AM
Perhaps next week she could show the kids Schindlers List.
Posted via Mobile Device

Baby Lee
06-21-2009, 07:38 AM
Perhaps next week she could show the kids Schindlers List.
Posted via Mobile Device

Jerry! How could you? During Schindler's List?

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 07:47 AM
Jerry! How could you? During Schindler's List?

That was classic. Making out during Schindlers List. I always thought it would be funny, in a push the envelope sort of way, to stand up in the middle of Schindlers List and start yelling "Comedy my ass!!!! This isn't funny!!!!!! You bastards told me this was a comedy!!!!!!"
Posted via Mobile Device

Baby Lee
06-21-2009, 07:57 AM
That was classic. Making out during Schindlers List. I always thought it would be funny, in a push the envelope sort of way, to stand up in the middle of Schindlers List and start yelling "Comedy my ass!!!! This isn't funny!!!!!! You bastards told me this was a comedy!!!!!!"
Posted via Mobile Device

Reminds me of a thread over at AVClub, they were reviewing some small movie about, IIRC, a rape and subsequent abortion, 'Lake of Fire' or something like that, and the comments section was a running gag of how furiously and enthusiastically viewers were beating the meat to the scene.

Buehler445
06-21-2009, 08:32 AM
Son, we live in a world that has walls and those walls need to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lieutenant Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago and curse the Marines; you have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives and that my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use then as the backbone of a life trying to defend something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest that you pick up a weapon and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Baby Lee
06-21-2009, 08:35 AM
Son, we live in a world that has walls and those walls need to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lieutenant Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago and curse the Marines; you have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives and that my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use then as the backbone of a life trying to defend something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest that you pick up a weapon and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Dude where's my car?

ClevelandBronco
06-21-2009, 08:38 AM
"The doctor explained that her insides were a rocky place, where my seed could find no purchase."

Kerberos
06-21-2009, 08:40 AM
"Charlie Don't Surf"

Baby Lee
06-21-2009, 08:48 AM
"The doctor explained that her insides were a rocky place, where my seed could find no purchase."

Do they blow up into funny shapes?
No, . . Lessin' you consider round funny.

ClevelandBronco
06-21-2009, 08:52 AM
Do they blow up into funny shapes?
No, . . Lessin' you consider round funny.

ROFL

crazycoffey
06-21-2009, 09:07 AM
Perhaps next week she could show the kids Schindlers List.
Posted via Mobile Device


I remember making a joke, standing in an elevator in Germany (munich, heidelberg, wherever). There was a plaque of some sort, naming the company that made/installed the elevator. I read this plaque and sited that I was offended because of my jewish heritage. The plaque read "Schindler's Lift"

BigRichard
06-21-2009, 09:16 AM
Say hello to my little friend!

crazycoffey
06-21-2009, 09:20 AM
Say hello to my little friend!

scarface

CoMoChief
06-21-2009, 09:47 AM
This town needs an enima.

Jack Nicholson - as the Joker in Batman

CoMoChief
06-21-2009, 09:49 AM
" A gook, a mexican, and a colored walk into a bar. Bartender walks up to them and says...get the fuck out of my bar."

Clint Eastwood.
-Gran Torino

DJay23
06-21-2009, 09:55 AM
"...or maybe it was the nude, gay, art show that took place in my room last night."

Buehler445
06-21-2009, 12:10 PM
"I KILLED YOUR CAT YOU DRUGGEE BITCH"
Posted via Mobile Device

whoman69
06-21-2009, 12:22 PM
In 1941 Slim Pickens swallows a compass that came in a box of cracker jacks. The japs who captured him have a broken one. They try to feed him laxatives and he says, "You ain't gettin' shit out'a me."

whoman69
06-21-2009, 12:35 PM
Oh, and BTW its Chester Arthur.

GoHuge
06-21-2009, 01:07 PM
What are your pleasures? What do you like to do? I don't know.....play chess.....screw. Well lets play chess!

cardken
06-21-2009, 01:19 PM
The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! -Rocky Balboa (2006)

cardken
06-21-2009, 01:53 PM
"Would you like to play a game?"-WarGames

unothadeal
06-21-2009, 02:01 PM
STRAIGHT JACKIN' saves you that mad cream!

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 02:12 PM
In 1941 Slim Pickens swallows a compass that came in a box of cracker jacks. The japs who captured him have a broken one. They try to feed him laxatives and he says, "You ain't gettin' shit out'a me."
OMG I forgot about that movie. Most underated film EVER. When they are stuck on top of the Farris Wheel, the old man, the Jerry Lewis-like kid and his dummy. And the kid comes to rescue them and the old man yells "Thank Christ!!"

Just perfect.
Posted via Mobile Device

Sully
06-21-2009, 02:43 PM
Do they blow up into funny shapes?
No, . . Lessin' you consider round funny.

Son, you've got a panty on your head.

KCChiefsMan
06-21-2009, 02:47 PM
"you're like this big f*cking bear man, with these big fangs and claws and all you have to do is go over there and kill the little bunny, but you don't know how to."

Baby Lee
06-21-2009, 03:36 PM
Son, you've got a panty on your head.

Why do you say you feel "trapped" in a man's body?


Well, sometimes I get them menstrual cramps real hard.

"Bob" Dobbs
06-21-2009, 03:39 PM
Ted, have you ever been face down in the mud, and been kicked in the head with an iron boot? Of course you haven't! No one has! It's a stupid question! Forget I even asked!

digger
06-21-2009, 03:53 PM
As good as it gets " Sell crazy somewhere else. We're all stocked up.",
The Shawshank Redemption " Brooks was here
so was Red" " why am I here? my lawyer ****ed me! We're all innocent, didn't you know that?",
A few good men" Son, we live in a world that has walls and those walls need to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lieutenant Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago and curse the Marines; you have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives and that my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use then as the backbone of a life trying to defend something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest that you pick up a weapon and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.".

chasedude
06-21-2009, 05:47 PM
I wanted to see exotic Vietnam... the crown jewel of Southeast Asia. I wanted to meet interesting and stimulating people of an ancient culture... and kill them. I wanted to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill!

"Bob" Dobbs
06-21-2009, 05:51 PM
What's a Nubian?

Reaper16
06-21-2009, 07:20 PM
I'M THIRTY-SEVEN?!?

rad
06-21-2009, 07:42 PM
"If you're staring at me, it better be because I'm the goddamn suspect. Because if I don't get some good leads soon, you're all gonna be demoted into something that's gonna require touching shit with your hands."

Pioli Zombie
06-21-2009, 07:45 PM
Put that coffee down!! Coffee is for closers.
Posted via Mobile Device

rad
06-21-2009, 07:45 PM
"I KILLED YOUR CAT YOU DRUGGEE BITCH"
Posted via Mobile Device

Boondock Saints

rad
06-21-2009, 07:46 PM
I'M THIRTY-SEVEN?!?

Clerks

"Bob" Dobbs
06-21-2009, 07:46 PM
"I'm not even supposed to BE here today!"

rad
06-21-2009, 07:46 PM
I wanted to see exotic Vietnam... the crown jewel of Southeast Asia. I wanted to meet interesting and stimulating people of an ancient culture... and kill them. I wanted to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill!

Full Metal Jacket

kstater
06-21-2009, 07:58 PM
You're out of your element.

Dayze
06-21-2009, 08:08 PM
"I mean, it's like 'how much more black can this be'? ....and the answer is....'none, more black'".

"Spinal Tap"

Dayze
06-21-2009, 08:17 PM
"There he is"!

"what...behind the rabbit"

<pause>

"It is the rabbit"


"....that's no ordinary rabit. he's a killer. He's the most fowl-tempered rodent, cruel and bad tempered rodent you've ever set eyes on"!

"You twit; I almost soiled my armor I was so scared"

"Look; that's no ordinary rabbit. he's got a viscious streak a mile-wide. It's a killer"!

"What's he gonna do, nibble your bum"?

"He's got huge, sharp......well, he can leap about....LOOK AT THE BONES"!

Sully
06-21-2009, 09:23 PM
No one may get this... It's from a weird movie I saw last week...


"because I'm a pimp. And pimps don't commit suicide."

ohiobronco2
06-21-2009, 09:30 PM
Are you finished with the questioning, Callahan?
Hypothetical situation, huh? All right, I'm standing on the street corner, and Mrs. Grey there comes up and propositions me. She says if I come home with her, for $5 she'll put on an exhibition with a Shetland pony...
If this is your idea of humor, Inspector...
All right, what are you trying to do here, Callahan?
I'm just trying to find out if anybody in this room knows what the hell law is being broken, besides cruelty to animals.


Well, when an adult male is chasing a female with intent to commit rape, I shoot the bastard. That's my policy.
Intent? How did you establish that?
When a naked man is chasing a woman through an alley with a butcher's knife and a hard-on, I figure he isn't out collecting for the Red Cross!

ohiobronco2
06-21-2009, 09:37 PM
What are you doing here?
I came to wake you up. I'm your new partner remember?
Kid get out of here. And forget that partner crap.
But Captain Tyler said...
Tell Tyler to shove it.

You really didn't think I'd leave... without making sure you were dead?

You lose!


If you come back in, I'll hit you with so many rights you'll be begging for a left.

ohiobronco2
06-21-2009, 09:37 PM
Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, Chief. We was comin' back from the island of Tinian to Leyte... just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in 12 minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. 13-footer. You know how you know that when you're in the water, Chief? You tell by looking from the dorsal to the tail. What we didn't know, was our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, Chief, sharks come cruisin', so we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know, it was kinda like old squares in the battle like you see in the calendar named "The Battle of Waterloo" and the idea was: shark comes to the nearest man, that man he starts poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark go away... but sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark he looks right into ya. Right into your eyes. And, you know, the thing about a shark... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be living... until he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red, and despite all the poundin' and the hollerin', they all come in and they... rip you to pieces. You know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men. I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand. I know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday morning, Chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player. Boatswain's mate. I thought he was asleep. I reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up, down in the water just like a kinda top. Upended. Well, he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon, the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us. He swung in low and he saw us... he was a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper. Anyway, he saw us and he come in low and three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and starts to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened... waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water; 316 men come out and the sharks took the rest, June the 29th, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

ohiobronco2
06-21-2009, 09:49 PM
Lois Griffin: Peter, it's just a phase. You've gone through a few yourself, you know.
Brian Griffin: Yeah, like those two weeks you spent narrating your own life.
Peter Griffin: [flashback] I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Lois had placed in front of me. Of course, I would never tell her how disgusted I was with her cooking, but somehow I think she knew. Lois had always been full of energy and life, but lately I had begun to grow more aware of her aging. The bright, exuberant eyes that I had fallen in love with were now beginning to grow dull and listless with the long fatigue of a weary life.
[Lois slugs Peter, knocking him out - cut to nighttime]
Peter Griffin: I awoke several hours later in a daze.

ChiefJustice
06-21-2009, 09:57 PM
As your leader, I encourage you from time to time, and always in a respectful manner, to question my logic. If you're unconvinced that a particular plan of action I've decided is the wisest, tell me so, but allow me to convince you and I promise you right here and now, no subject will ever be taboo. Except, of course, the subject that was just under discussion. The price you pay for bringing up either my Chinese or American heritage as a negative is... I collect your fucking head. Just like this fucker here. Now, if any of you sons of bitches got anything else to say, now's the fucking time!
[pause]
I didn't think so.

RedDread
06-22-2009, 12:12 AM
"Why's everything always gotta be a f***ing tragedy with you???"

Dayze
06-22-2009, 10:07 AM
"The doctor explained that her insides were a rocky place, where my seed could find no purchase."

"Well, sometimes I get the menstreal cramps REAL hard"

Sully
06-22-2009, 10:12 AM
Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the way the world ends. Not with a whimper, but with a bang. But there is hope. In the end we can be reassured by one undeniable truth. Nobody rocks the cock like Krysta Now. And I mean nobody.

tooge
06-22-2009, 12:25 PM
"It puts the lotion on its skin." (blabbering fat girl.....) "It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose. That's right precious, it gets the hose."

tooge
06-22-2009, 12:27 PM
"You ever seen a grown man naked?" Man I love those stupid old airplane lines.

shitgoose
06-22-2009, 12:39 PM
"Oh, please dear! I've got news for you: the Supreme Court has roundly rejected prior restraint!"

Walter, this isn't a first amendment thing

Sir, if you don't calm down I'm going to have to ask you to leave

Lady, I've got friends who died face down in the muck so we could enjoy this family restaurant

Alright, I'm leaving. Sorry Ma'am

Dude, don't leave. This affects all of us!

Our basic freedoms!

I'm staying. Finishing my coffee"

shitgoose
06-22-2009, 12:47 PM
You must be out your goddamn mind! Joe Louis is the greatest boxer that ever lived. I'll be with you boys in a minute. He was better than Cassius Clay, he was better than Sugar Ray, and that new dude--what's his name? Mike Tyson?--looks like a bulldog; he was better than him too.

What about Rocky Marciano?

Oh, there they go. There they go, every time I start talkin 'bout boxing, a white man got to pull Rocky Marciano out their ass. That's their one, that's their one. Rocky Marciano. Rocky Marciano. Let me tell you something once and for all. Rocky Marciano was good, but compared to Joe Louis, Rocky Marciano ain't shit.

He beat Joe Louis' ass.

That's right, he did whoop Joe Louis' ass.

Joe Louis was seventy five years old when they fought.

I don't know how old he was, but he got his ass whooped.

Joe Louis had come out of retirement to fight Rocky Marciano and he was seventy six years old. Joe Louis is always lying about his age. He lie about his age all the time. One time Frank Sinatra came in here and sat in this chair. I said Frank 'you hang out with Joe Louis, just between me and you, how old is Joe Louis.' You know what Frank told me, he said "Hey, Joe Louis is 137 years old." A hundred and thirty-seven years old!

Oh. Man, you ain't never meet no Frank Sinatra.

**** you, **** you, and **** you! Who's next?!

Buck
06-22-2009, 12:49 PM
"I mean, it's like 'how much more black can this be'? ....and the answer is....'none, more black'".

"Spinal Tap"

Endless choices from this movie...

Slainte
06-22-2009, 12:54 PM
http://auteurs_production.s3.amazonaws.com/stills/10601/ExtermiAngel_w.jpg

CoMoChief
06-22-2009, 01:01 PM
HEY THERE WERE SKITTLES IN THAT BAG!!!!!!!!!!!:cuss:

Donger
06-22-2009, 01:11 PM
P-51! Cadillac of The Sky!

Garcia Bronco
06-22-2009, 01:12 PM
Parenthood

Helen (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001848/): It sounds like a boy Garry's age needs a man around the house.
Tod (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000206/): Well, it depends on the man. I had a man around. He used to wake me up every morning by flicking lit cigarettes at my head. He'd say, "Hey, asshole, get up and make me breakfast." You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, or drive a car. Hell, you need a license to catch a fish! But they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.

Dartgod
06-22-2009, 01:35 PM
You know something Joan, if you didn't have a pussy there'd be a bounty on your head.

And you are a schizophrenic, psychopathic, maladjusted social misfit who is clearly in the middle of a very deep homosexual panic.

So you want to dance or what?

shitgoose
06-22-2009, 03:00 PM
No, seriously dude, he's a sex offender, with a record. Did six months in Chino for exposing himself to an eight year old. Had to go door to door and tell everyone he was a pederast.

What's a pederast Walter?

Shut the fuck up Donny.

Mr. Plow
06-22-2009, 03:12 PM
Go F*CK yourself San Diego.

Gonzo
06-22-2009, 03:15 PM
Head on a stick....

Thread ovah

Rausch
06-22-2009, 04:04 PM
You see life is like that. We change, that's all. You see, the guy I am now is not the guy I was then. If the guy I was then met the guy I am now he'd beat the shit out of me. Those are the facts.

David Roby: Tell me something, Bro - Why do you allow him in here?
Miles Roby: I think he just comes in here to make sure I know there's no hard feelings.
David Roby: He steals your wife, and there's no hard feelings?
Miles Roby: Some sins trail their own penance.

Pastor: I know what you're feeling, my boy. Look at it this way, he's gone to a better place.
Lonnie Bannon: I don't think so... not unless dirt is a better place than air.

Turkey Creek Jack Johnson: Why you doin' this, Doc?
Doc Holliday: Because Wyatt Earp is my friend.
Turkey Creek Jack Johnson: Friend? Hell, I got lots of friends.
Doc Holliday: ...I don't.

Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need.

...

Pioli Zombie
06-22-2009, 04:38 PM
What do you mean I'm funny?
Posted via Mobile Device

MOhillbilly
06-22-2009, 04:42 PM
You gunna skin that Smoke Wagon, ur just stand there and bleed?

rad
06-22-2009, 07:58 PM
"If you're staring at me, it better be because I'm the goddamn suspect. Because if I don't get some good leads soon, you're all gonna be demoted into something that's gonna require touching shit with your hands."

Nobody got this......huh.

Eagle Eye (Billy Bob Thorton)

digger
06-22-2009, 08:07 PM
As your leader, I encourage you from time to time, and always in a respectful manner, to question my logic. If you're unconvinced that a particular plan of action I've decided is the wisest, tell me so, but allow me to convince you and I promise you right here and now, no subject will ever be taboo. Except, of course, the subject that was just under discussion. The price you pay for bringing up either my Chinese or American heritage as a negative is... I collect your ****ing head. Just like this ****er here. Now, if any of you sons of bitches got anything else to say, now's the ****ing time!
[pause]
I didn't think so.


Kill Bill Vol. 1

digger
06-22-2009, 08:15 PM
You must be out your goddamn mind! Joe Louis is the greatest boxer that ever lived. I'll be with you boys in a minute. He was better than Cassius Clay, he was better than Sugar Ray, and that new dude--what's his name? Mike Tyson?--looks like a bulldog; he was better than him too.

What about Rocky Marciano?

Oh, there they go. There they go, every time I start talkin 'bout boxing, a white man got to pull Rocky Marciano out their ass. That's their one, that's their one. Rocky Marciano. Rocky Marciano. Let me tell you something once and for all. Rocky Marciano was good, but compared to Joe Louis, Rocky Marciano ain't shit.

He beat Joe Louis' ass.

That's right, he did whoop Joe Louis' ass.

Joe Louis was seventy five years old when they fought.

I don't know how old he was, but he got his ass whooped.

Joe Louis had come out of retirement to fight Rocky Marciano and he was seventy six years old. Joe Louis is always lying about his age. He lie about his age all the time. One time Frank Sinatra came in here and sat in this chair. I said Frank 'you hang out with Joe Louis, just between me and you, how old is Joe Louis.' You know what Frank told me, he said "Hey, Joe Louis is 137 years old." A hundred and thirty-seven years old!

Oh. Man, you ain't never meet no Frank Sinatra.

**** you, **** you, and **** you! Who's next?!

Coming to America

Lumpy
06-22-2009, 09:28 PM
"Don't f**k with me fellas. This ain't my first time at the rodeo."

shitgoose
06-23-2009, 06:57 PM
By the time college rolls around I'll be like the Iron Chef of pounding vaj.

Baby Lee
06-23-2009, 07:59 PM
This one deserves so much more than words on a page/screen.

Fireworks in earnest at 6:15, apres 7:00, le deluge.

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jjchieffan
06-23-2009, 09:10 PM
"The doctor explained that her insides were a rocky place, where my seed could find no purchase."

Raising Arizona, Nicolas Cage

acesn8s
06-23-2009, 09:35 PM
Where all the white women at? http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/confused/confused0058.gif (http://www.mysmiley.net/freesmiley.php?smiley=confused/confused0058.gif)

greg63
06-23-2009, 10:17 PM
"I'll bite your legs off"