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DaKCMan AP
07-02-2009, 11:10 AM
Hiring managers shared these 43 memorable interview responses:<o></o>
Why did you leave your last job? <o></o>
1. "I have a problem with authority." - Carrie Rocha, COO of HousingLink<o></o>
Tell us about a problem you had with a co-worker and how you resolved it
2. "The resolution was we were both fired."- Jason Shindler, CEO, Curvine Web Solutions<o></o>
What kind of computer software have you used?
3. "Computers? Are those the black boxes that sit on the floor next to the desks? My boss has one of those. He uses it. I don't have one. He just gives me my schedule and I follow it." - Greg Szymanski, director of human resources, Geonerco Management, Inc<o></o>
What are your hobbies and interests?
4. [He said] 'Well, as you can see, I'm a young, virile man and I'm single -- if you ladies know what I'm saying.' Then he looked at one of the fair-haired board members and said, 'I particularly like blondes.'" - Petri R.J. Darby, president, darbyDarnit Public Relations<o></o>
Why should we hire you?
5. "I would be a great asset to the events team because I party all the time." - Bill McGowan, founder, Clarity Media Group<o></o>
Do you have any questions?
6. "Cross dressing isn't a problem is it?" - Barry Maher, Barry Maher & Associates<o></o>
7. "If you were a fruit, what fruit would you be?" - Megan Garnett, Articulate Leadership Team, Articulate Communications Inc.<o></o>
8. "What do you want me to do if I cannot walk to work if it's raining? Can you pick me up?" - Christine Pechstein, career coach<o></o>
9. "I was a Chamber of Commerce Executive once hiring a secretary. [The candidate asked] 'What does a Chamber of Commerce do?'" - Mary Kurek, Mary Kurek, Inc. Visibility Consulting<o></o>
10. "Can we wrap this up fairly quickly? I have someplace I have to go." - Bruce Campbell, vice president of marketing, Clare Computer Solutions<o></o>
11. "What is your company's policy on Monday absences?" - Campbell<o></o>
12. "If this doesn't work out can I call you to go out sometime?" - Christine Bolzan, founder of Graduate Career Coaching<o></o>
13. "How big do the bonuses really get once you make associate? I hear it's some serious cash." - Bolzan<o></o>
14. "[The candidate asked,] 'Can my dad call you to talk about the job and the training program? He is really upset I'm not going to medical school and wants someone to explain the Wall Street path to him.' The dad did call. Then that dad's friends called and I ended up doing a conference call with a group of concerned parents ... long story." - Bolzan<o></o>
15. "If I get an offer, how long do I have before I have to take the drug test?" - Bolzan<o></o>
16. "When you do background checks on candidates, do things like public drunkenness arrests come up?" - Bolzan<o></o>
17. "Can I get a tour of the breast pumping room? I heard you have a great one here and while I don't plan on having children for at least 10 or 12 years, I will definitely breast feed and would want to use that room."- Bolzan<o></o>
18. "So, how much do they pay you for doing these interviews?" - Jodi R.R. Smith, Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting<o></o>
Why are you leaving your current job?
19. "Because I (expletive) my pants every time I enter the building." - Abbe Mortimore, Human Resources Manager, True Textiles, Inc.<o></o>
20. "I was fired from my last job because they were forcing me to attend anger management classes." - Smith<o></o>
Why are you looking for a job?
21. "Cigarettes are getting more expensive, so I need another job." - Pechstein<o></o>
22. "My parents told me I need to get a job so that is why I'm here." - McGowan<o></o>
Why do you want to work for us?
23. "Just for the benefits." - Jennifer Juergens, JJ Communications<o></o>
24. "My old boss didn't like me, so one day, I just left and never came back. And here I am!" - Matt Cowall, communications manager, Appia Communications<o></o>
25. "I saw the job posted on Twitter and thought, why not?" - Rebecca Gertsmark Oren, Communications Director at The Rudd Center for Food Policy and Obesity<o></o>
What are your assets? (as in strengths)
26. "Well, I do own a bike." - Pam Venné, principal, The Venné Group <o></o>
What are your weaknesses?
27. "I get angry easily and I went to jail for domestic violence. But I won't get mad at you." - Pechstein<o></o>
28. "I had a job candidate tell me that she often oversleeps and has trouble getting out of bed in the morning." - Linda Yaffe, certified executive coach<o></o>
29. "I am an alcoholic and do not deserve this job." - Deb Bailey, owner, Power Women Magazine & Radio Show<o></o>
30. "I'm really not a big learner. You know ... some people love learning and are always picking up new things, but that's just not me. I'd much rather work at a place where the job is pretty stagnant and doesn't change a lot." - Michaele Charles, Voice Communications<o></o>
When have you demonstrated leadership skills?
31. "Well my best example would be in the world of online video gaming. I pretty much run the show; it takes a lot to do that." - Rachel Croce<o></o>
Is there anything else I should know about you?
32. "You should probably know I mud wrestle on the weekends." - Venne<o></o>
When can you start?
33. "I need to check with my mom on that one." - Bolzan<o></o>
Use three adjectives to describe yourself
34. "I hate questions like this." - Katrina Meistering, manager of outreach, National Fatherhood Initiative<o></o>
Tell of a time you made a mistake and how you dealt with it
35. "I stole some equipment from my old job, and I had to pay for its replacement." - Meistering<o></o>
Have you submitted your two weeks' notice to your current employer?
36. "What is two weeks' notice? I've never quit a job before, I've always been fired." - Meistering<o></o>
Random responses
37. "One guy [said] 'it would probably be best' if I didn't run a background check on him. Of course, I did, and learned all about his long, sordid past of law-breaking. Our client actually offered him a job as a staff accountant, but quickly retracted the offer when I had to tell them all about his recent arrest for a meth lab in his basement." - Charles<o></o>
38. "[A] guy said he did not have a mailing address, as he was living in a gypsy camp at the airport." - Sandra L. Flippo, SPHR<o></o>
39. "I went into the lobby to pick up a candidate. As he stood up, his trousers fell to the floor! [He said] 'Oh, my gosh -- they told me I needed a suit for the interview. I've got no money -- so I borrowed this thing. It's too big!'" - Beth Ross, executive and career coach<o></o>
40. "Wow -- I'm not used to wearing dress shoes! My feet are killing me. Can I show you these bloody blisters?" - Bolzan<o></o>
41. "May I have a cup of coffee? I think I may still be a little drunk from last night." - Smith<o></o>
42. (During a telephone call to schedule the interview) "Can we meet next month? I am currently incarcerated." - Smith<o></o>
43. "[A candidate] was asked whether he could advocate impartially on behalf of the various universities he would be representing since he had attended one of them. He responded, 'Well, I don't like to poop where I eat, but I thought my education sucked, so I certainly wouldn't put that school above the others.'" - Darby<o></o>
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http://jobs.aol.com/articles/2009/07/17/43-things-actually-said-in-job-interviews/?ncid=AOLCOMMjobsDYNLprim0001&icid=webmail|wbml-aol|dl4|link3|http%3A%2F%2Fjobs.aol.com%2Farticles%2F2009%2F07%2F17%2F43-things-actually-said-in-job-interviews%2F%3Fncid%3DAOLCOMMjobsDYNLprim0001 (http://jobs.aol.com/articles/2009/07/17/43-things-actually-said-in-job-interviews/?ncid=AOLCOMMjobsDYNLprim0001&icid=webmail%7Cwbml-aol%7Cdl4%7Clink3%7Chttp%3A%2F%2Fjobs.aol.com%2Farticles%2F2009%2F07%2F17%2F43-things-actually-said-in-job-interviews%2F%3Fncid%3DAOLCOMMjobsDYNLprim0001)

Pestilence
07-02-2009, 11:21 AM
What are your assets? (as in strengths)
26. "Well, I do own a bike." - Pam Venné, principal, The Venné Group

Midnight_Vulture?

When have you demonstrated leadership skills?
31. "Well my best example would be in the world of online video gaming. I pretty much run the show; it takes a lot to do that." - Rachel Croce

Hootie?

DaKCMan AP
07-02-2009, 11:25 AM
My favorites:

Hiring managers shared these 43 memorable interview responses:
Why should we hire you?
5. "I would be a great asset to the events team because I party all the time." - Bill McGowan, founder, Clarity Media Group
Do you have any questions?
7. "If you were a fruit, what fruit would you be?" - Megan Garnett, Articulate Leadership Team, Articulate Communications Inc.
Why are you leaving your current job?
19. "Because I (expletive) my pants every time I enter the building." - Abbe Mortimore, Human Resources Manager, True Textiles, Inc.
What are your weaknesses?
27. "I get angry easily and I went to jail for domestic violence. But I won't get mad at you." - Pechstein

Hydrae
07-02-2009, 01:24 PM
What are your assets? (as in strengths)
26. "Well, I do own a bike." - Pam Venné, principal, The Venné Group

Midnight_Vulture?

When have you demonstrated leadership skills?
31. "Well my best example would be in the world of online video gaming. I pretty much run the show; it takes a lot to do that." - Rachel Croce

Hootie?

"I am a Fiddy at Halo so I rule and you should hire me!"

Ebolapox
07-02-2009, 01:33 PM
ROFL

that's good shit.

Otter
07-02-2009, 01:38 PM
Christine Bolzan sounds like a fun person to swap stories with, she made quite a few of those quotes.

Rain Man
07-02-2009, 01:42 PM
Is there anything else I should know about you?
32. "You should probably know I mud wrestle on the weekends." - Venne


This one is actually a great strategy.

Scorp
07-02-2009, 01:48 PM
Do you have any questions?
6. "Cross dressing isn't a problem is it?" - Barry Maher, Barry Maher & Associates


Claythan?

Mr. Flopnuts
07-02-2009, 02:04 PM
What makes you think you're qualified for this position?

I really don't like your tone. How do you people not know how to properly address a 50 at Halo? /Hootie

Demonpenz
07-02-2009, 02:13 PM
I admit right up front I don't like people and I don't deal with them well

Phobia
07-02-2009, 02:33 PM
I hired a guy as a temporary sub-contractor once. He KNEW it was just for that one job but wanted it to turn into something permanent. It was during that job that he disclosed to me that he was suing his former employer for work comp and that he didn't tell me but he shouldn't be carrying heavy things due to a back injury - he'd been schlepping toilets and drywall all week. Then he disclosed that the court appearance he'd told me was for an expired license was actually for a suspended license, DUI, and leaving the scene.

He wasn't back the next day. Crazy thing is that he calls me looking for work every couple months and when I tell him no he refers me to acquaintances. The last guy he sent me is working out really, really well right now.

Deberg_1990
07-02-2009, 02:53 PM
I admit right up front I don't like people and I don't deal with them well

Make sure you wear that Wolf shirt to your next interview. That should help.

RJ
07-02-2009, 02:57 PM
Years ago I managed a restaurant and was looking over some applications to hire a new dishwasher. You know the part that asks if you've ever been convicted of a crime, and if so please describe? Here was one answer.....

Yes.

"I fount a stolen cash register and was carged with it."

I'll never forget that answer or that spelling.

RJ
07-02-2009, 02:59 PM
I admit right up front I don't like people and I don't deal with them well


They'd probably find out eventually anyway.

Deberg_1990
07-02-2009, 02:59 PM
Years ago I managed a restaurant and was looking over some applications to hire a new dishwasher. You know the part that asks if you've ever been convicted of a crime, and if so please describe? Here was one answer.....

Yes.

"I fount a stolen cash register and was carged with it."

I'll never forget that answer or that spelling.

since when is spelling a prerequiste for washing dishes? :)

RJ
07-02-2009, 03:05 PM
since when is spelling a prerequiste for washing dishes? :)


I actually interviewed the kid, but I found someone else who had never fount a stolen cash register.

The ability to tolerate miserable work conditions was way more important than spelling.

Demonpenz
07-02-2009, 03:06 PM
washing dishes sucks, but I will never forget how good that shower felt afterwards

Rain Man
07-02-2009, 03:40 PM
I hired a guy as a temporary sub-contractor once. He KNEW it was just for that one job but wanted it to turn into something permanent. It was during that job that he disclosed to me that he was suing his former employer for work comp and that he didn't tell me but he shouldn't be carrying heavy things due to a back injury - he'd been schlepping toilets and drywall all week. Then he disclosed that the court appearance he'd told me was for an expired license was actually for a suspended license, DUI, and leaving the scene.

He wasn't back the next day. Crazy thing is that he calls me looking for work every couple months and when I tell him no he refers me to acquaintances. The last guy he sent me is working out really, really well right now.


So he asks if you have work and you say no, and then he asks if you need someone else and you say yes, and he sends you good workers? I'm thinking this guy takes a hint pretty slowly.

Phobia
07-02-2009, 03:42 PM
So he asks if you have work and you say no, and then he asks if you need someone else and you say yes, and he sends you good workers? I'm thinking this guy takes a hint pretty slowly.

I straight up tell him that I'm not going to use HIM. But he keeps calling. He's my pro-bono recruiter. I'll keep answering the phone too.

Rain Man
07-02-2009, 03:46 PM
I straight up tell him that I'm not going to use HIM. But he keeps calling. He's my pro-bono recruiter. I'll keep answering the phone too.

Have you considered starting a headhunter business on the side? Next time he calls, tell him you need a Certified Public Accountant with 6 to 10 years of experience working on corporate tax law, and see how he does.

Katipan
07-02-2009, 03:55 PM
I was so comfortable in my last interview that I referred to the AEs that I babysat as "sweetly retarded". And then clenched my ass cheeks for a look of absolute disgust on my interviewers face.

Turns out her husband is a Boston badass that refers to everyone that way.

Best job I've ever had.

listopencil
07-02-2009, 06:15 PM
And then clenched my ass cheeks


Pics?