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crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 03:36 PM
Guess that makes this a piss thread!
Just woke up about two hours ago, hernia surgery was a success, but I can't leave till I pee. Tried twice, I know I have to, but nothing....

On my GF's I phone in the hospital, isn't technology wonderful?
Oh-drugs are pretty cool too; percocet.

Fritz88
07-06-2009, 03:37 PM
think of Gonzo, it'll flow smoothly.

Ultra Peanut
07-06-2009, 03:42 PM
YOU WILL NEVER, EEEEEEEEEEEEEVER
PEE
. . .
AGAAAAAAAAAYN!

crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 03:47 PM
Quick, someone make the sounds of a bubbling brook, a whispy waterfall, a raging roaring river, the sound of a water fountain, and hiss like a snake; all at the same time!

Buehler445
07-06-2009, 03:48 PM
Glad you're surgery went well.

FWIW I drank an iced coffee and a giant pepsi yesterday while I was driving back and had to pee HORRIBLY bad.

(Does that help)
Posted via Mobile Device

ziggysocki
07-06-2009, 03:49 PM
Stage fright!

crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 03:50 PM
Ten thousand casino dollars to the first person to make me pee, or conveince my girl that "milking it" will actually help.

CrazyPhuD
07-06-2009, 03:50 PM
Just don't cross the streams.

crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 03:51 PM
Stage fright!

I know

CrazyPhuD
07-06-2009, 03:51 PM
Are you allowed to drink beer? Lots of it? If so that will make you pee. Afterall everyone knows you never buy it, you only rent it.

Rooster
07-06-2009, 03:53 PM
Ten thousand casino dollars to the first person to make me pee, or conveince my girl that "milking it" will actually help.

ROFLROFL

booger
07-06-2009, 03:53 PM
i saw a program on discovery health that had a dude that had a similar procedure and he pooped out of his weiner as a side effect for a couple of weeks.

better ask a nurse about that and get back to us right away.

crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 03:58 PM
Glad you're surgery went well.

FWIW I drank an iced coffee and a giant pepsi yesterday while I was driving back and had to pee HORRIBLY bad.

(Does that help)
Posted via Mobile Device

two cranberrys, a sprite, on my third apple juice and a half a cup of the worst coffe I've ever tasted (I think they brewed it sometime last week!) and I feel like I gotta go, but nothing....

LaChapelle
07-06-2009, 04:00 PM
Coffee. If you drink something hot, your body doesn't need to get it to body temperature. It goes out quicker.

crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 04:02 PM
i saw a program on discovery health that had a dude that had a similar procedure and he pooped out of his weiner as a side effect for a couple of weeks.

better ask a nurse about that and get back to us right away.

ROFL
maybe this can be a poop thread!!!

crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 04:05 PM
Coffee. If you drink something hot, your body doesn't need to get it to body temperature. It goes out quicker.

I tried, but seriously this coffee was horrible tasting! I almost drank the whole cup, on to my fourth apple juice

booger
07-06-2009, 04:06 PM
ROFL
maybe this can be a poop thread!!!

you gotta ask one of the nurses if that is true. Say an old Dr. friend told you so.

also ask all the nurses to see their knees. Tell them you need to find the head nurse and you can tell becuase that one has knee pads and gives the bj's.

gblowfish
07-06-2009, 04:10 PM
Turn up the volume!
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ae1RqLvO4a8&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ae1RqLvO4a8&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

stumppy
07-06-2009, 04:18 PM
Ten thousand casino dollars to the first person to make me pee, or conveince my girl that "milking it" will actually help.


I'll tell you the same thing Brunhilda the nurse told me after my surgery. You can't leave until you pee. If you can't get things flowing pretty soon we're going to have to use a catheter. :eek: About 20 mins later I took care of business. She seemed a bit disappointed.

booger
07-06-2009, 04:20 PM
i think i know why you can't pee.

Take off the condom. Your brain waves get confused when you try to pee with a condom on.

hope this helps.

Gracie Dean
07-06-2009, 04:21 PM
turn on the sink full blast and run the water



have your girl softly go up and down your spine close to your butt

more down than up

booger
07-06-2009, 04:22 PM
just like christy ricci in blacksnake moan?

Halfcan
07-06-2009, 04:38 PM
best wishes to a speedy recovery

DenverChief
07-06-2009, 04:40 PM
warm soda will make you pee fast

Skip Towne
07-06-2009, 04:42 PM
Whoa! I just took a big healthy piss. Almost 38 seconds worth!!

booger
07-06-2009, 04:45 PM
ROFL
maybe this can be a poop thread!!!

tell them your pissed cause you now have to wipe your pecker after you go and you want to talk about the money back guarantee.

CrazyPhuD
07-06-2009, 04:49 PM
How about falling asleep with your hand in warm water?

sd4chiefs
07-06-2009, 05:19 PM
I tried, but seriously this coffee was horrible tasting! I almost drank the whole cup, on to my fourth apple juice

I had the same problem after my first hernia surgery and they finally had to use a catheter. That's a tube that they stick up your dick. :deevee:

bevischief
07-06-2009, 05:28 PM
How about falling asleep with your hand in warm water?

ROFL

bevischief
07-06-2009, 05:29 PM
I had the same problem after my first hernia surgery and they finally had to use a catheter. That's a tube that they stick up your dick. :deevee:

ROFL

bevischief
07-06-2009, 05:29 PM
On a serious note hope all goes well.

bevischief
07-06-2009, 05:32 PM
See if this helps...

crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 05:32 PM
Well, I guess I owe the nurse the money, she came out with the ultrasound thingy to check how much I had in there, and I know it was alot, I could feel the pressure. She said if I was full and still didn't go she was going to do the catheter thing, like you guys said. I had to sit on the edge of my seat with the piss jug, but I got some out, and was able to go home, sans-penistube.

ROFL at the funny comments, and thanks for the well wishes. I'm home, eating soup and getting ready to pop a vicoden and a stool softener. I'll be back if I end up pooping on myself and drawing on the wall with it or something.....

cdcox
07-06-2009, 05:36 PM
Did you have a catheter? If so the reason you can't pee is that you have a big scab inside your wiener that is clogging up all the plumbing.

booger
07-06-2009, 05:51 PM
Well, I guess I owe the nurse the money, she came out with the ultrasound thingy to check how much I had in there, and I know it was alot, I could feel the pressure. She said if I was full and still didn't go she was going to do the catheter thing, like you guys said. I had to sit on the edge of my seat with the piss jug, but I got some out, and was able to go home, sans-penistube.

ROFL at the funny comments, and thanks for the well wishes. I'm home, eating soup and getting ready to pop a vicoden and a stool softener. I'll be back if I end up pooping on myself and drawing on the wall with it or something.....

please draw a poop starfish and post a pic.

thanks in advance.

Ultra Peanut
07-06-2009, 05:53 PM
Well, I guess I owe the nurse the money, she came out with the ultrasound thingy to check how much I had in there, and I know it was alot, I could feel the pressure. She said if I was full and still didn't go she was going to do the catheter thing, like you guys said. I had to sit on the edge of my seat with the piss jug, but I got some out, and was able to go home, sans-penistube.

ROFL at the funny comments, and thanks for the well wishes. I'm home, eating soup and getting ready to pop a vicoden and a stool softener. I'll be back if I end up pooping on myself and drawing on the wall with it or something.....http://j.photos.cx/jerichoclap-a7c.gif

crazycoffey
07-06-2009, 05:55 PM
Did you have a catheter? If so the reason you can't pee is that you have a big scab inside your wiener that is clogging up all the plumbing.

No, it was a hernia surgery, so they put alot of that area to sleep and the bladder is one of the last things to "wake up"

please draw a poop starfish and post a pic.

thanks in advance.

I'll do my best....

booger
07-06-2009, 05:58 PM
if i think it's pretty enough i will print out the pick of the poop starfish and hang it on the fridge.