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Count Zarth
11-21-2009, 07:19 AM
Confirm, deny or ridicule, ladies?

http://fabandfurious.com/?p=187

1. Saying “I love you” immediately before, during, or following sex doesn’t count.

2. Real men drive stick shift.

3. I will leave if you lie.

4. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).

5. I’m convinced I’m pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so.

6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear.

7. “Fine” is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.

8. Most of the time when I fantasize, it’s about you.

9. I’m terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her.

10. I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you.

11. I expect you to call me.

12. Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants. (This one is funny! bwahahaha!)

13. I’m scared of losing my independence.

14. I’m more forgiving of you than I really should be.

15. Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick.

16. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I’m not. (See directly above.)

17. If I’m not having sex with you, I’m… a.) …having a fat day. b.) …not feeling “connected” to you. c.) …blackmailing you to get something I want.

18. Shoes determine whether you’re fashionable or not.

19. I own a Debbie Gibson CD, and I’m not afraid to use it.

20. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.

21. A man I love plans the occasional fancy-schmancy dress-up date and impromptu weekend getaways, and he buys my favorite candy in advance when we’re just going to the movies.

22. You look hot in hooded clothing items.

23. You should never tell me what to do.

24. If I slept over, you owe me breakfast.

25. My breasts love much licking and sucking.

26. If you ask me out directly, I will say yes.

27. I’m very impressed when you ask for my advice.

28. I’m unimpressed with a man who doesn’t take the lead.

29. I want to be Madonna.

30. Women get urinary-tract infections easily, so watch (and wash) your fingers.

31. I’m in heaven when you hold my hand.

32. You’re sexy when you’re shaving, fixing things, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, driving, eating a peach, holding a baby.

33. I need to hear how you feel about me. Often. Tell me now.

34. When in doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.

35. Surprises, especially gifts for moi = more loving.

36. I want to be the best thing that ever happened to you–and for you to recognize this.

37. If I’m not feeling loved, I will start looking….

38. Discussion of ex-gf’s and ex-bf’s should be avoided at all times.

39. I like it when you tell me what you’re thinking, even if you don’t know yourself.

40. Celebrating our anniversary, even if it’s only been a few months, earns major bonus points.

41. I love it when you’re sweaty.

42. It’s best to consult your gal pals for gift ideas.

43. A lady should always be greeted with kisses.

44. I like porn.

45. I love holding your bum in the palms of my hands.

46. Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public.

47. It’s cheating as soon as you’re doing something with her that you wouldn’t want me to see, hear, read…

48. For the record: I’d rather you break up with me than cheat.

49. I remember everything about our relationship.

50. You should know all this and more without my telling you.

JD10367
11-21-2009, 07:21 AM
22. You look hot in hooded clothing items.

http://www.cultureby.com/trilogy/images/2007/11/02/bill_belichick.jpg

CoMoChief
11-21-2009, 07:53 AM
http://www.cultureby.com/trilogy/images/2007/11/02/bill_belichick.jpg

HAHAHAHA i wish you posted him in the cut-off one. Thats even better.

CaliforniaChief
11-21-2009, 08:28 AM
http://www.cultureby.com/trilogy/images/2007/11/02/bill_belichick.jpg

Rule #51: If you make an ungodly amount of money I'll throw out all of the other 50 rules and be yours forever. Even if you do cut your own hoodie sleeves.

Bane
11-21-2009, 08:30 AM
Rule #51: If you make an ungodly amount of money I'll throw out all of the other 50 rules and be yours forever. Even if you do cut your own hoodie sleeves.

Yeah no shit!!!ROFL

Fritz88
11-21-2009, 08:38 AM
too much shit

Blindside58
11-21-2009, 08:55 AM
Men -
1. We love Oral Sex
2. Don't lose the remote control
3. Cold Beer Heals all emotional and physical wounds
4. We love Oral Sex

LaChapelle
11-21-2009, 09:15 AM
Is your dick in her mouth all the time to where she can't talk
then let her free her hands from your balls to write it down

jjjayb
11-21-2009, 09:27 AM
Confirm, deny or ridicule, ladies?

http://fabandfurious.com/?p=187

1. BLAH BLAH BLAH

Jesus, did anyone actually read all of that. I made it to about line 3 before I realized I don't really give a shit.

Count Zarth
11-21-2009, 09:30 AM
Jesus, did anyone actually read all of that. I made it to about line 3 before I realized I don't really give a shit.

You'd be a better mate and lover if you took the list seriously.

Fairplay
11-21-2009, 09:54 AM
Jesus, did anyone actually read all of that. I made it to about line 3 before I realized I don't really give a shit.



Tell me about it. To many rules.

RJ
11-21-2009, 09:58 AM
You'd be gay if you took the list seriously.



FYP

Sure-Oz
11-21-2009, 10:00 AM
FYP

agreed...no one thinks about any of that shit or gives a shit, esp talking to a woman

Baby Lee
11-21-2009, 10:27 AM
Men -
1. We love Oral Sex
2. Don't lose the remote control
3. Cold Beer Heals all emotional and physical wounds
4. We love Oral Sex

I'm challenging Adam Corolla to the crown, no one on earth receives oral as good as me.

luv
11-21-2009, 10:37 AM
Did a man write these?

#6 - deifinitely yes
#29 - definitely no

Donger
11-21-2009, 10:53 AM
Did a man write these?

LMAO

I had the same thought about ten or so in.

Rain Man
11-21-2009, 11:29 AM
Well, at least I've got #41 covered.

Demonpenz
11-21-2009, 11:37 AM
why can't people use fine correctly? Would you rather have a good wine or fine wine, rather have a good car fine car

Rain Man
11-21-2009, 11:49 AM
why can't people use fine correctly? Would you rather have a good wine or fine wine, rather have a good car fine car

Would you rather have Larry Fine or Moe Howard?

scott free
11-21-2009, 12:43 PM
too much shit

LOL, exactly... chicks, they're just like Bill Murray in 'What About Bob'... 'I WANT I WANT!, I NEED I NEED!'.

Men could trim that huge list down to about 3 things that they need to know about us.

bayarealightning
11-21-2009, 12:51 PM
Confirm, deny or ridicule, ladies?

http://fabandfurious.com/?p=187



23. You should never tell me what to do.

I just wonder why this doesn't work both ways!?

LaChapelle
11-21-2009, 12:55 PM
#1) Stop being playdough

Raised On Riots
11-21-2009, 02:28 PM
Too much work for Planet attention-span.

jjjayb
11-21-2009, 04:04 PM
You'd be a better mate and lover if you took the list seriously.

Coming from the 40 year old virgin? I've been happily married for 10+ years. I don't need a bullshit list to tell me how to be a great mate and lover.

Count Zarth
11-21-2009, 07:41 PM
Coming from the 40 year old virgin? I've been happily married for 10+ years. I don't need a bullshit list to tell me how to be a great mate and lover.

Your wife is miserable, though.

jjjayb
11-21-2009, 07:58 PM
Your wife is miserable, though.

Nope. She's very happy. I just got her a new vacuum. Now she'll have more time to do the ironing and cooking. ;)

Count Zarth
11-21-2009, 08:23 PM
Nope. She's very happy. I just got her a new vacuum. Now she'll have more time to do the ironing and cooking. ;)

She's crying inside. When was the last time you even had a blowjob?