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El Jefe
03-18-2010, 07:52 AM
I was thinking about something last night, last night was the first time that I cried in front of my girlfriend. I didn't know what to think of it at first, but I couldn't help it. It did make me feel less masculine, but I've been going through a rough patch. I've always kept things in, but between my dad's heart attack, my mothers sickness, my cousins downward spiral, and the shakey finances of our family business, I just couldn't. My mother's been very sickly for about 10 plus years, and she has had some very dark thoughts, that's all I will say on that. My cousin who is like my brother was shipped out to Nevada by his mother to his crazy father. I have been there for him his entire life, but last summer he started walking his own path, drinking, sexing, smoking weed, he's only 16. He called me one night crying saying how depressed he was and how he needed my help. He called me crying and sobbing to me asking me to fix it, and I couldn't fix it. It really crushed my spirit, so I opened up to my girlfriend about it, and for the 2nd time in adulthood I cried. Anyone else going through a rough patch? Just looking for some prayers for my family, this has taken a huge toll on the family.

tymania
03-18-2010, 07:57 AM
No shame in crying man… Life gets you down sometimes, everyone goes through it in some shape or form. Life is a constant circle of ups and downs. Its all about how you bounce back up that makes life worth living. I am sorry to hear about your situation, sounds really rough. I have gone through my share of rough patches in my life.. one rough patch, when my parents got divorced and my father died shortly after, I went through therapy for sometime on that one, and it helped. I am a firm believer in leaning on someone when you need someone to talk to, it will tear you apart if you hold everything inside.

Hope everything starts to turn around for you here real soon!

Chiefs=Good
03-18-2010, 07:58 AM
My prayers are with you man. Can't say that i have the same levels of problems in my life as you of late. Seems to me that your entitled to cry. Hang in there...

El Jefe
03-18-2010, 08:26 AM
Thanks fellas, I appreciate it.

Bwana
03-18-2010, 08:49 AM
It's all good, hang in there partner.

DaKCMan AP
03-18-2010, 08:53 AM
I was thinking about something last night, last night was the first time that I cried in front of my girlfriend. I didn't know what to think of it at first, but I couldn't help it. It did make me feel less masculine, but I've been going through a rough patch. I've always kept things in, but between my dad's heart attack, my mothers sickness, my cousins downward spiral, and the shakey finances of our family business, I just couldn't. My mother's been very sickly for about 10 plus years, and she has had some very dark thoughts, that's all I will say on that. My cousin who is like my brother was shipped out to Nevada by his mother to his crazy father. I have been there for him his entire life, but last summer he started walking his own path, drinking, sexing, smoking weed, he's only 16. He called me one night crying saying how depressed he was and how he needed my help. He called me crying and sobbing to me asking me to fix it, and I couldn't fix it. It really crushed my spirit, so I opened up to my girlfriend about it, and for the 2nd time in adulthood I cried. Anyone else going through a rough patch? Just looking for some prayers for my family, this has taken a huge toll on the family.

Just keep pushing through and you'll make it to the other side. I'm going through a rough patch right now too, although when put in perspective it's not as severe as what you describe. Mine has a few pressures/stress mechanisms but most of it is a breakup a couple days ago. Just focus on the positives and rely on your friends (and for you, your gf) to rally around you and give you strength. There's no shame in crying. It's an outlet, an expression of emotion and it means that you're alive, that you care and that you feel - all good things, IMO.

Hydrae
03-18-2010, 09:05 AM
Prayers and thoughts for your entire family.

Is there any chance your cousin could stay with you while he finishes school? Sounds like you might be a better parental figure than the father.

MTG#10
03-18-2010, 09:07 AM
Nothing wrong with crying man. Its been almost a year since my life was torn apart and I cried about it today. Not in front of anyone, wont do that but that's just me. Hang in there.

Short Leash Hootie
03-18-2010, 09:10 AM
Nothing wrong with crying man. Its been almost a year since my life was torn apart and I cried about it today. Not in front of anyone, wont do that but that's just me. Hang in there.

but your "roster" is much more impressive because of it

PhillyChiefFan
03-18-2010, 09:14 AM
Thoughts and prayers for you bud.

I know how it feels, I really do. No shame in crying. When my mother was going through deep depression and had suicidal thoughts, I had a pilar of a wife and strong ties with friends that I didn't turn to to talk to. Bottled it up, and winded up breaking down one day. Now I know better and I learned from it. Trust me, there is no shame in talking about what's on your mind.

MTG#10
03-18-2010, 09:16 AM
but your "roster" is much more impressive because of it

Im not sure Im following you...if you mean my sex life, Im not happy with it. I would rather have one person that I actually care about than a bunch of skanks any day.

Short Leash Hootie
03-18-2010, 09:22 AM
Im not sure Im following you...if you mean my sex life, Im not happy with it. I would rather have one person that I actually care about than a bunch of skanks any day.

to each their own I suppose

MTG#10
03-18-2010, 09:25 AM
to each their own I suppose

One day you will fall in love and it will change your outlook.

Short Leash Hootie
03-18-2010, 09:27 AM
One day you will fall in love and it will change your outlook.

hopefully not with a family member like the last time

Mr. Plow
03-18-2010, 09:42 AM
Going through a rough patch myself with my mom right now. Like you, I've been holding it all in, but I honestly don't know how much longer I can.

Keep your head up and like others have said, lean on those people close to you for support.

bevischief
03-18-2010, 09:46 AM
Going through a rough patch myself with my mom right now. Like you, I've been holding it all in, but I honestly don't know how much longer I can.

Keep your head up and like others have said, lean on those people close to you for support.

This.

Katipan
03-18-2010, 09:49 AM
You don't need a specific reason to cry. It's just a catalyst.
We (women) often use it to feel better.

Talking to your girlfriend helped you, I bet your brother talking to you helped him. If thats all you can do right now, it's still plenty.

MOhillbilly
03-18-2010, 09:57 AM
sissy. you atleast turned some depeche mode on first right?

Ebolapox
03-18-2010, 09:59 AM
hopefully not with a family member like the last time

Que?

Saulbadguy
03-18-2010, 10:02 AM
sissy. you atleast turned some depeche mode on first right?

First :eek: then ROFL

Jilly
03-18-2010, 10:13 AM
You don't need a specific reason to cry. It's just a catalyst.
We (women) often use it to feel better.

Talking to your girlfriend helped you, I bet your brother talking to you helped him. If thats all you can do right now, it's still plenty.

yep. it's healthy, and I bet your girlfriend was truly blessed by your being vulnerable with her

Short Leash Hootie
03-18-2010, 10:13 AM
Que?

lol

Phobia
03-18-2010, 10:21 AM
Don't worry about a thing. I've cried at least twice. First time was in boot camp and they sent us into a building full of chemical gas. Second time, I had a large stick of wood protruding from my calf.... no, wait - I didn't cry that time. I'm pretty sure I cried another time though.

Seriously though, I can cry on command. I do it sometimes for a laugh. Can you believe Keanu Reeves has work and somebody with my skill-set does not?

boogblaster
03-18-2010, 10:29 AM
Like your thread .. LIFE .. sometimes we get fed turds and other times we get T-bones .. It works that way for most of us .. Hang in bud things seems to cycle ..

ziggysocki
03-18-2010, 10:34 AM
Don't worry about a thing. I've cried at least twice. First time was in boot camp and they sent us into a building full of chemical gas. Second time, I had a large stick of wood protruding from my calf.... no, wait - I didn't cry that time. I'm pretty sure I cried another time though.

Seriously though, I can cry on command. I do it sometimes for a laugh. Can you believe Keanu Reeves has work and somebody with my skill-set does not?

CS tears in the gas chamber are the most cleansing. ROFL Seriously @ the OP; Some people cry, some people punch stuff. Others don't say a word to anyone. Whatever works for you... don't add shame to the list of shit bugging you.

El Jefe
03-18-2010, 12:19 PM
CS tears in the gas chamber are the most cleansing. ROFL Seriously @ the OP; Some people cry, some people punch stuff. Others don't say a word to anyone. Whatever works for you... don't add shame to the list of shit bugging you.

True.

rambleonthruthefog
03-18-2010, 12:24 PM
any man who is afraid to cry is less of a man. being vulnerable and allowing your emotions to flow out is healthy, as long as you don't make a habit of it. as for the rest, good luck. keep your shoulders straight, eyes forward staring down the world that will never quit coming. listen to some good music, i always start out with truckin by the grateful dead.

petegz28
03-18-2010, 12:35 PM
Don't ever feel like less of a man because you cried. Real men cry. Some more easily than others but nonetheless. It does your body and mind good to get it out. Crying is a human emotion and we all do it. I don't care what other people say, all men cry at times.

Buehler445
03-18-2010, 01:12 PM
Shit happens dude. Don't worry about it. Seriously.

Just be the best man you can be each and every day.
Posted via Mobile Device

MOhillbilly
03-18-2010, 01:25 PM
He called me one night crying saying how depressed he was and how he needed my help. He called me crying and sobbing to me asking me to fix it, and I couldn't fix it. It really crushed my spirit, so I opened up to my girlfriend about it, and for the 2nd time in adulthood I cried. Anyone else going through a rough patch? Just looking for some prayers for my family, this has taken a huge toll on the family.

Bigman, I hope my post made you smile abit. I feel you to the core of who I am when you say i wish i could 'FIX' things, seems like i been tryin to do that all my like w/ mixed results.
But sometimes my man you gotta just take care of yourself.
To answer you ? about who else is goin through a rough patch.
This is an email my mom sent me.

If you wanna talk Vato Loco 2 Vato Loco smoke me

--I know you don't check this very often and that is fine. I am not going to tell you anything you don't already know. You are my strong, proud wonderful son. I have loved you since the first morning when I realized you were coming into my life and I will love you to my last breath. I will always be here for you no matter what my plans were -- you come first.

If you need funds to get ***** out of your house let me know. I can't send money to keep you going - I think if you two are going to work things out the money part is important. But if you decide that you are done and need $ for a u-haul, or to keep you eating let me know.

and if you decide that the two of you are going to try to make another go of it. That is ok with me too. Only you can decide when and if. Like I told you last night son, make a plan. Don't let you emotions over-ride your good sense. And no hitting

Love you
Mom

Katipan
03-18-2010, 01:42 PM
Bigman, I hope my post made you smile abit. I feel you to the core of who I am when you say i wish i could 'FIX' things, seems like i been tryin to do that all my like w/ mixed results.
But sometimes my man you gotta just take care of yourself.
To answer you ? about who else is goin through a rough patch.
This is an email my mom sent me.

If you wanna talk Vato Loco 2 Vato Loco smoke me

--I know you don't check this very often and that is fine. I am not going to tell you anything you don't already know. You are my strong, proud wonderful son. I have loved you since the first morning when I realized you were coming into my life and I will love you to my last breath. I will always be here for you no matter what my plans were -- you come first.

If you need funds to get ***** out of your house let me know. I can't send money to keep you going - I think if you two are going to work things out the money part is important. But if you decide that you are done and need $ for a u-haul, or to keep you eating let me know.

and if you decide that the two of you are going to try to make another go of it. That is ok with me too. Only you can decide when and if. Like I told you last night son, make a plan. Don't let you emotions over-ride your good sense. And no hitting

Love you
Mom

Your mommy is badass.

MOhillbilly
03-18-2010, 01:54 PM
Your mommy is badass.

Yes she is.

There was an escaped convict out our way circa 1980. She picked me up from the bus stop shotgun in tow.

FAX
03-18-2010, 02:20 PM
I've always been pretty stoic, but I can hear a particular piece of music at a particular time and spontaneously tear up without warning. It's a feeling as though a part of my soul is missing or something.

But, I did weep like a baby before I got married. Thought I was going to die or go permanently insane. Sex with only one woman for the rest of my life? What in the name of Victoria's Secret was I thinking? Oh, my God.

I told the beautiful and witty Fiance FAX that I stubbed my toe real bad.

FAX

big nasty kcnut
03-18-2010, 02:21 PM
I cry sometime it's just happen your not any less of a man to do it. I'm sturggling with bills right now and trying to make a name for myself in the blogging thing. It's hard but you'll get through it.

patteeu
03-18-2010, 02:25 PM
hopefully not with a family member like the last time

WTF? Is your sister hot or something? Dude.

Cntrygal
03-18-2010, 02:28 PM
I'm not impressed with 2010 at all. This year has sucked.