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View Full Version : Life Smellympics - Round 6 - The Final Four


Rain Man
05-11-2010, 06:27 PM
Okay, in the Final Four we're going with a Survivor format. There are four smells left in the running, all true heavyweights in the olfactory field.

You will vote for three of the four. The lowest vote total in this round gets eliminated and then we go again with the top three.

LetsSignRussell
05-11-2010, 06:29 PM
omg. wheres the rain?

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 06:31 PM
omg. wheres the rain?

It rained out the entire barbecue, so we went inside for cookies.

Baconeater
05-11-2010, 06:32 PM
It should be smooth sailing for bacon with BBQ out of the way.

Pestilence
05-11-2010, 06:36 PM
It should be smooth sailing for bacon with BBQ out of the way.

This.

I see a finals between Bacon and Cinnamon Rolls.

cdcox
05-11-2010, 06:37 PM
I hope the meatabators will follow me in voting option 5. How will the carboholics respond to that! Bacon is fine, but there is a point to be made.

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 06:42 PM
This.

I see a finals between Bacon and Cinnamon Rolls.



All of these are deserving finalists, but freshly baked bread should by all rights be the runaway winner. I'd be willing to bet that heaven smells like freshly baked bread.

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 06:45 PM
I hope the meatabators will follow me in voting option 5. How will the carboholics respond to that! Bacon is fine, but there is a point to be made.


Here, have a cinnamon roll. It'll make you feel better.

http://johnsonscorner.com/upload/Cinnamon_Roll_for_Web_page_with_background.jpg

Pestilence
05-11-2010, 06:46 PM
All of these are deserving finalists, but freshly baked bread should by all rights be the runaway winner. I'd be willing to bet that heaven smells like freshly baked bread.

Heaven smells like the air after rain.

Reaper16
05-11-2010, 06:47 PM
I refuse to vote in this rigged competition made empty, flaccid, by the agenda-over-Democracy of the man we trusted to be fair in these Smellympics, one Mr. Rain Man.

Were I to cast a ballot amongst these four choices I would vote for freshly baked bread.

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 06:47 PM
Heaven smells like the air after rain.

Hmm, good point. With all the clouds, I bet you're right.



And just in case you meaturbators get any ideas, none of the finalists are wearing jewelry.

vailpass
05-11-2010, 06:47 PM
Heaven smells like the air after rain.

Yep with a hint of gunpowder-sprinkled pussy wafting under your nose every now and again.

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 06:48 PM
I refuse to vote in this rigged competition made empty, flaccid, by the agenda-over-Democracy of the man we trusted to be fair in these Smellympics, one Mr. Rain Man.

Were I to cast a ballot amongst these four choices I would vote for freshly baked bread.


Mmmmm, bread coming out of the oven, and then a chunk of cold solid butter that goes on right before you bite into it. It's enough to make a fellow forget about barbecue.

Reaper16
05-11-2010, 06:50 PM
Mmmmm, bread coming out of the oven, and then a chunk of cold solid butter that goes on right before you bite into it. It's enough to make a fellow forget about barbecue.
I can see where someone who doesn't live in Kansas City would say that.

mlyonsd
05-11-2010, 06:51 PM
For a cancer fund raiser of a 25 yearl old girl a couple of years back I baked 88 loaves of cinnamon swirl bread.

That being said I think bacon wins.

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 06:54 PM
I can see where someone who doesn't live in Kansas City would say that.

It's time to put politics behind us and support our party's candidate. Bread needs our help! Do it for the country. Do it for the children. Do it for the right to rightfully call bread the greatest smell ever.

LetsSignRussell
05-11-2010, 06:55 PM
EVERYONE VOTE FOR BREAD

mlyonsd
05-11-2010, 07:02 PM
Bread is a fine smell. But only as a pretext to frying bacon where a true homemade BLT with fresh tomato is made.

Any bread will do, but you can't have that first garden fresh BLT without bacon.

LetsSignRussell
05-11-2010, 07:03 PM
yes rain man. what kind of bread?

alnorth
05-11-2010, 07:04 PM
Bread is a fine smell. But only as a pretext to frying bacon where a true homemade BLT with fresh tomato is made.

Any bread will do, but you can't have that first garden fresh BLT without bacon.

actually, I think breakfast, salads, etc have all demonstrated that bacon does quite well without having to share the spotlight with bread.

Count Alex's Wins
05-11-2010, 07:04 PM
Meat is beaten!

CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES FOR THE MOTHERFUCKING WIN!!!

http://www.iblogwhatieat.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/niki-jenessa-eating-cookies.jpg

alnorth
05-11-2010, 07:05 PM
Meat is beaten!

CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES FOR THE MOTHER****ING WIN!!!

http://www.iblogwhatieat.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/niki-jenessa-eating-cookies.jpg

dream on. Bacon will triumph over all. I don't think even a single united BBQ candidate would have beaten dead pig flesh.

Count Alex's Wins
05-11-2010, 07:06 PM
SEX APPEAL! SEX APPEAL!

http://us.123rf.com/400wm/400/400/Dndavis/Dndavis0909/Dndavis090900080/5515768.jpg http://i.imgur.com/kBi2k.jpg (https://addons.mozilla.org/firefox/1174) http://comps.fotosearch.com/comp/BLD/BLD028/woman-eating-chocolate_%7EBLD055805.jpg

CrazyPhuD
05-11-2010, 07:08 PM
Are the cookies 'special'?

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 07:09 PM
How often do you eat bread instead of bacon, though? They don't call bacon the staff of life. You don't go to a friend's house to "break bacon" together. Money isn't called bacon. Priests don't thank god for their daily bacon. You don't work to put bacon on the table.

Bread is not just part of our life. It's part of our culture. It's part of our speech. It's part of our very fiber. And in great part that's due to the smell.

Did I ever mention that my dad was a bread delivery man when I was a kid, and that my mother worked in the bread store at the same time? Mmmmm, those were the days.

As a bit of trivia, in those days the bread ties were actual metal ties with a colored coating on them. The bakery's secret (this was Tastee Bread if you remember them) was that the colors of the ties changed every day. This meant that the delivery men could look at a loaf and know when it was made so they could rotate the stock on the store shelves.

mlyonsd
05-11-2010, 07:12 PM
actually, I think breakfast, salads, etc have all demonstrated that bacon does quite well without having to share the spotlight with bread.

Exactly.

On a side note, do voters actually understand they are just voting for cinnamon rolls, and not caramel rolls? Big difference. You can get cinnamon rolls out of a tube made by that pasty white fat boy named Pillsbury.

Bacon comes from an animal that has to endure the hardships of a hog yard....fighting off competition at the food trough. Fighting off disease just so they can sacrifice themselves for your 'two eggs, hashbrowns, bacon crisp, and whatever kind of bread you have that isn't stale'.

Baconeater
05-11-2010, 07:14 PM
You don't work to put bacon on the table.

Not true, you can bring home the bacon.

Reaper16
05-11-2010, 07:15 PM
It's time to put politics behind us and support our party's candidate. Bread needs our help! Do it for the country. Do it for the children. Do it for the right to rightfully call bread the greatest smell ever.
I will do no such thing. I will not unite with you, sir. I don't wish to associate myself with cheating abusers of power. Besides, barbecue is the greatest smell (a stance agreed upon by myself and the gerrymandered majority of ChiefsPlanet).

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 07:21 PM
Not true, you can bring home the bacon.


Oh. Touche.

mlyonsd
05-11-2010, 07:22 PM
How often do you eat bread instead of bacon, though? They don't call bacon the staff of life. You don't go to a friend's house to "break bacon" together. Money isn't called bacon. Priests don't thank god for their daily bacon. You don't work to put bacon on the table.

Bread is not just part of our life. It's part of our culture. It's part of our speech. It's part of our very fiber. And in great part that's due to the smell.

Did I ever mention that my dad was a bread delivery man when I was a kid, and that my mother worked in the bread store at the same time? Mmmmm, those were the days.

As a bit of trivia, in those days the bread ties were actual metal ties with a colored coating on them. The bakery's secret (this was Tastee Bread if you remember them) was that the colors of the ties changed every day. This meant that the delivery men could look at a loaf and know when it was made so they could rotate the stock on the store shelves.

No offense to your parents but if you have to come up with a catch brand name like "Tastee" you've already lost the battle.

Bacon is bacon.

Interesting about the ties though...didn't know that.

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 07:24 PM
I will do no such thing. I will not unite with you, sir. I don't wish to associate myself with cheating abusers of power. Besides, barbecue is the greatest smell (a stance agreed upon by myself and the gerrymandered majority of ChiefsPlanet).

Your cause is lost. You are the equivalent of an unmarried Mohican. Come to bread and help it claim the throne. I realize that you're scared, you're angry, maybe even a little hurt. Your world was rocked today by the deconstruction of a lifetime myth that you were probably taught by your parents and grandparents. But with this pain comes enlightenment and progress. Step out of the darkness and into the light of bread.

mlyonsd
05-11-2010, 07:27 PM
I will do no such thing. I will not unite with you, sir. I don't wish to associate myself with cheating abusers of power. Besides, barbecue is the greatest smell (a stance agreed upon by myself and the gerrymandered majority of ChiefsPlanet).

Give it a rest. Wood smoke is a carcinogine just like tobacco. Are you on record as saying smoking in bars or a restaurant is ok? Because smoking meat in your own driveway and having it waft over to the neighbor's yard while their kids are playing is the same thing.

Consistent1
05-11-2010, 07:37 PM
Hootie told me the thing he likes smelling the most is the sweet scent of alcohol on teenager's breath. He also mentioned something he soaks a rag with, but I can't remember it.
Posted via Mobile Device

Count Alex's Wins
05-11-2010, 07:46 PM
How often do you eat bread instead of bacon, though?

Well, actually, humans are now eating chicken in place of bread, with bacon in the middle.

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 07:53 PM
It looks like two things I love, bread and cookies, are locked in a death match. This is painful, kind of like being forced to watch my two grandmothers fight to the death with hatchets and saws. Man, I hated family reunions as a kid.

cdcox
05-11-2010, 07:54 PM
Bacon is nothing but instant BBQ, sans sauce.

bevischief
05-11-2010, 08:00 PM
What happened to bbq?

cdcox
05-11-2010, 08:01 PM
What happened to bbq?

Lies, deceit, treachery.

Baconeater
05-11-2010, 08:03 PM
Bacon is nothing but instant BBQ, sans sauce.
And I love it for that.

bevischief
05-11-2010, 08:03 PM
Lies, deceit, treachery.

Wait who was doing the bribing?

kstater
05-11-2010, 08:04 PM
My protest worked. It really really worked. It's the first time I've accomplished something here.

Zebedee DuBois
05-11-2010, 08:07 PM
Bread, rolls, and cookies will go through the ordeal meat experienced in the last dance.

Bread, indeed, is the foundation of life (after mankind matured from a strictly meat only diet, and quit telling those homo erectus nttawwt jokes) A wonderful inviting smell. Of course, cinnamon is basically that same bread smell - but with added cinnamon - so- a superior version. Cookies? c'mon. no one can actually smell the chocolate chips when they're baking.

Reaper16
05-11-2010, 08:23 PM
Your cause is lost. You are the equivalent of an unmarried Mohican. Come to bread and help it claim the throne. I realize that you're scared, you're angry, maybe even a little hurt. Your world was rocked today by the deconstruction of a lifetime myth that you were probably taught by your parents and grandparents. But with this pain comes enlightenment and progress. Step out of the darkness and into the light of bread.
Ohhohohohoho, how delightful. Imperialist rhetoric is the last recourse of the power-drunk. You used your might to crush the spirit of so many people and you expect them to abandon what comes naturally to their people in favor of your ways, your cultural touchstones. Well here's a newsflash for you, Imperialist: post-colonial literature shows us how a colonized people will overthrow their captors and find renewed faith in the traditional ways of the land. Your victory in the short term will bankrupt you both financially and spiritually. You have gerrymandered barbecue out of the finals but heed my warning, for it will come true sooner than you think: Try and separate a man from his soul and you will only strengthen him while you lose your own.

Give it a rest. Wood smoke is a carcinogine just like tobacco. Are you on record as saying smoking in bars or a restaurant is ok? Because smoking meat in your own driveway and having it waft over to the neighbor's yard while their kids are playing is the same thing.
Cancer gives kids character. If you don't give your own kids cancer then you will have failed as a parent.

*Serious post: equivocating wood smoke with cigarette smoke is stupid and makes you stupid.*

RJ
05-11-2010, 08:26 PM
I'll say it again.....travishomockery.

DeezNutz
05-11-2010, 08:26 PM
Give it a rest. Wood smoke is a carcinogine just like tobacco. Are you on record as saying smoking in bars or a restaurant is ok? Because smoking meat in your own driveway and having it waft over to the neighbor's yard while their kids are playing is the same thing.

Just relax. Can you smell me now?

http://memyselfmeningioma.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/burning-wood.jpg

Pablo
05-11-2010, 08:52 PM
This poll makes me a sad panda.

Goddamn BBQ was too savory for it's own good. Bacon better win this bitch by a landslide.

Cuz fuck cookies, that's why.

RJ
05-11-2010, 09:02 PM
Those are all four fine aromas, but this smell-off looks like it came from fans of some effete, latte sipping liberal team. I feel like I accidentally stumbled onto a 49'ers board. I bet that freshly baked bread is sourdough and the bacon is turkey bacon.

teedubya
05-11-2010, 09:23 PM
Heaven smells like the air after rain.

You are wrong.

Heaven smells like smoked bacon cinnamon rolls after the rain, fresh out of the oven.

Pablo
05-11-2010, 09:25 PM
Those are all four fine aromas, but this smell-off looks like it came from fans of some effete, latte sipping liberal team. I feel like I accidentally stumbled onto a 49'ers board. I bet that freshly baked bread is sourdough and the bacon is turkey bacon.This ain't no goddamn commie pinko fag board.

Groves
05-11-2010, 09:47 PM
Because smoking meat in your own driveway and having it waft over to the neighbor's yard while their kids are playing is the same thing.

I'm sure this is why cigarette smoke also made the elite 8?

RJ
05-11-2010, 09:48 PM
This ain't no goddamn commie pinko pillowbiter board.


The hell it's not! You ever read the DC forum? That place is filled with commie pinko pillowbiters. And they all hate barbecue almost as much as they hate an honest day's work for an honest day's pay.

Rain Man
05-11-2010, 09:56 PM
Those are all four fine aromas, but this smell-off looks like it came from fans of some effete, latte sipping liberal team. I feel like I accidentally stumbled onto a 49'ers board. I bet that freshly baked bread is sourdough and the bacon is turkey bacon.

Oh gosh, I love sourdough.


Maybe this was the wrong post-quote to mention that, though.

RJ
05-11-2010, 10:09 PM
Oh gosh, I love sourdough.


Maybe this was the wrong post-quote to mention that, though.


Yep, I love sourdough too......WITH A HALF POUND OF SLICED BRISKET AND SOME BARBECUE SAUCE PILED ON IT!!!!




Sorry, I got a little carried away.....

Pablo
05-11-2010, 10:11 PM
I'm a huge fan of HICKORY SMOKED sourdough bread.

LetsSignRussell
05-11-2010, 10:15 PM
bread ftw

alnorth
05-12-2010, 12:34 AM
Yep, I love sourdough too......WITH A HALF POUND OF SLICED BRISKET AND SOME BARBECUE SAUCE PILED ON IT!!!!




Sorry, I got a little carried away.....

geez, where the hell do you think this is? Kansas City?

patteeu
05-12-2010, 08:16 AM
Well, actually, humans are now eating chicken in place of bread, with bacon in the middle.

LMAO Bread is obsolete, but bacon endures.

http://images.stltoday.com/blogzone/off-the-menu/files/2010/04/KFC-Double-Down.jpg

mlyonsd
05-12-2010, 10:30 AM
*Serious post: equivocating wood smoke with cigarette smoke is stupid and makes you stupid.*

Whoa....I used to think you were all smart and stuff. Chemistry class must have been something you flunked or didn't take.

Although wood smoke conjures up fond memories of sitting by a cozy fire, it is important to know that the components of wood smoke and cigarette smoke are quite similar, and that many components of both are carcinogenic


The EPA estimates that a single fireplace operating for an hour and burning 10 pounds of wood will generate 4,300 times more PAHs than 30 cigarettes. PAHs are carcinogenic.


http://www.ehhi.org/woodsmoke/health_effects.shtml

The U.S. EPA estimates the cancer risk from wood smoke is twelve times greater than that from equal amounts of tobacco smoke.

http://burningissues.org/smoke.htm

Of course my post was just in jest but when you throw the stupid card and all.....

patteeu
05-12-2010, 10:33 AM
Speaking of burnt flesh

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/43/86616191_f267fc7fa5.jpg

Reaper16
05-12-2010, 12:27 PM
Whoa....I used to think you were all smart and stuff. Chemistry class must have been something you flunked or didn't take.





http://www.ehhi.org/woodsmoke/health_effects.shtml



http://burningissues.org/smoke.htm

Of course my post was just in jest but when you throw the stupid card and all.....
Where are the studies about the amount of wood smoke generated by small lump charcoal (which is what we're talking about)? Furthermore, do you links account for the cocktail of chemicals in cigarettes that differentiate its smoke from wood smoke?

mlyonsd
05-12-2010, 01:07 PM
Where are the studies about the amount of wood smoke generated by small lump charcoal (which is what we're talking about)? Furthermore, do you links account for the cocktail of chemicals in cigarettes that differentiate its smoke from wood smoke?

No, I was talking about wood smoke as in caused by real wood burning. Like in 'meat on a smoker'.

Maybe we just got our smokes crossed.

Rain Man
05-12-2010, 01:52 PM
Speaking of burnt flesh

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/43/86616191_f267fc7fa5.jpg



Is that from the last chiefsplanet bash?

Reaper16
05-12-2010, 02:40 PM
No, I was talking about wood smoke as in caused by real wood burning. Like in 'meat on a smoker'.

Maybe we just got our smokes crossed.
Everything you linked is about large amounts of wood being burned, such as in a fireplace. Fireplaces, of course, funnel the smoke up above roof level. Smokers don't use large chinks of firewood, they use lump charcoal - which is small and has been exposed to high temperature to get chemicals out.

mlyonsd
05-12-2010, 02:49 PM
Everything you linked is about large amounts of wood being burned, such as in a fireplace. Fireplaces, of course, funnel the smoke up above roof level. Smokers don't use large chinks of firewood, they use lump charcoal - which is small and has been exposed to high temperature to get chemicals out.

Well you'd be flat out wrong about how most things are smoked but go ahead.

Reaper16
05-12-2010, 03:11 PM
Well you'd be flat out wrong about how most things are smoked but go ahead.
At home, which is what we're talking about, people mostly use lump charcoal with small fruit wood chunks. I don't know how that is supposed to be worse than cigarette smoke.

mlyonsd
05-12-2010, 03:35 PM
At home, which is what we're talking about, people mostly use lump charcoal with small fruit wood chunks. I don't know how that is supposed to be worse than cigarette smoke.

I don't recall saying it was worse that cigarette smoke.

I did post some links that make the claim that burning wood is worse than cigarettes though. I'll let you argue with them.

Like I said, my post was in jest, sorry you took it so seriously.