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Saccopoo
06-08-2010, 11:24 AM
1. Facial Hair
- Sure, it makes a man a man, and I feel sorry for the poor, testosterone challenged schmucks who can't grow one, but it's a pain in the ass, whether you grow one or choose not to grow one. Why you ask? Because:

a. Ingrown hairs in my beard.
- Try digging out a pile of six or seven barbed wire thick stubs that have decided to get together and wreak havoc on your epidermal. Then try doing that while working your way through a forest of growth that's thicker and less forgiving than the Congo underbrush. And they are usually in places where you can reach, see and subsequently self-operate on like some 17th century Turkish field medic.

b. The Stink
- Beards stink. Dead skin. Leftover food particles. Gruel that seeps in from the corners of your mouth that trickles out as you sleep. Liquids - of various kinds. You just can't wash all that shit out from a full beard - ever.

c. The Shave
- Chicks cry long and hard about having to shave their legs. Boo ****ing hoo. You can put on pants, hose or whatever. You don't even have to shave the goddamn things. Try taking a sharp as hell razor to your most visible and noticeable part of your body every goddamn day. And then having to worry about if that razor was just used by your chick on her legs and your face end up looking like a teenage extra from a Halloween XIX flick.

d. Blowing your nose
- Try cleaning that shit up properly with a full beard and mustache.

2. Balls
- They might as well have two Faberge eggs down there, right out in front, as awkwardly placed as possible. At least other animal species properly evolved so that they ran on all fours and their best stuff was somewhat protected.

3. Penis
- Super. Girls get a nice rack and their sex ugly tucked up and hidden from view. Guys get this floppy, dangly hunk of meat wiggling around. And try living with this thing through your junior high and high school years and attempting to figure out how you are going to hide the boner you just got every six minutes or so.

4. Man Stink
- Guys smell. Bad. Like exponentially worse than chicks. We walk briskly to catch the elevator and we're pumping out a stench that rivals the festered ass on a menstruating skunk. Our feet get funky within minutes of confinement. And our balls always stink, no matter how many times a day we wash them, which isn't many. In fact, most guy never really properly wash their balls anyway.

5. Back Hair
- While the ability of a man to grow a full beard is nearly the pinnacle of "manliness," a guy who is able to grow a shag rub on the top of his traps is a wonder to behold. Women love to run their fingers through this man forest. They love to have us lie on our stomachs and pour baby oil over our lats and lovingly massage the thick pubic like clumps of hair, swirling it into patterns and vague geometric shapes that would have made Jackson Pollack proud.

Pestilence
06-08-2010, 11:26 AM
Ummm......don't grow a beard.

And you bitch a lot......are you sure you're really a man?

Bugeater
06-08-2010, 11:27 AM
Oh, I properly wash my balls. Over and over and over again.

Crush
06-08-2010, 11:28 AM
6. Ass Hair

Crush
06-08-2010, 11:28 AM
The best part of the shower, in my opinion, is washing the balls.

Crush
06-08-2010, 11:29 AM
Mainly, because it brings sweet relief from the crabs.

gblowfish
06-08-2010, 11:29 AM
I thought I didn't have to wash my legs?

Ebolapox
06-08-2010, 11:31 AM
let's be completely honest: you were contemplating putting 'the chiefs not drafting a LT every fucking year' on your list.

Detoxing
06-08-2010, 11:34 AM
Ummm......don't grow a beard.

And you bitch a lot......are you sure you're really a man?

LMAO

vailpass
06-08-2010, 11:35 AM
Between this and your posts in the True Blood thread I just have to ask: did it hurt when you had your butt-cherry popped?

MOhillbilly
06-08-2010, 11:36 AM
to all who bitch.
your man card revocation notice is in the mail.

Saccopoo
06-08-2010, 11:37 AM
6. Ass Hair

Ain't that the truth. About once a month I've got to take a pairing knife and try to cut through the tangles and knots in my ass crack as they get all worked together and start pulling each other out. That's some uncomfortable shit right there.

MOhillbilly
06-08-2010, 11:38 AM
The best part of the shower, in my opinion, is washing the balls.

yours or his?

vailpass
06-08-2010, 11:38 AM
Ain't that the truth. About once a month I've got to take a pairing knife and try to cut through the tangles and knots in my ass crack as they get all worked together and start pulling each other out. That's some uncomfortable shit right there.

:D Alright, is your whole persona here a schtick? If so congrats, it's a good one.

Saccopoo
06-08-2010, 11:39 AM
Between this and your posts in the True Blood thread I just have to ask: did it hurt when you had your butt-cherry popped?

You're the Sally who's all teared up about someone criticizing your Vampire Bill made for TV chick flick. Talk about vaging it up. Tell your boyfriend to massage your labia. It will make you feel much better.

Phobia
06-08-2010, 11:39 AM
This seems to be written from the perspective of a bi-sexual man. He prefers a man but wants his man to be as fem as possible.

I have balls and I love them. They're my favorite toys and they're always available to scratch and caress. What an amazing gift from God!

The only part to which I can relate is the back hair. That's not fun but by the time that stuff starts coming in you should have already been able to trick a quality woman into marrying you so it's not really that big of a problem for me.

Saccopoo
06-08-2010, 11:41 AM
:D Alright, is your whole persona here a schtick? If so congrats, it's a good one.

Consider it my personification of my inner Sybil(s). If you can't have fun on the intranets, why bother?

vailpass
06-08-2010, 11:42 AM
You're the Sally who's all teared up about someone criticizing your Vampire Bill made for TV chick flick. Talk about vaging it up. Tell your boyfriend to massage your labia. It will make you feel much better.

Criticizing is one thing, dragging your poop-covered mouth all over it is another. Seriously, what kind of man talks like this? When you sneeze does semen come out of your nose?:

Women in todays society are basically deprived of romance, passion and adventure. (Blame Gloria Steinem I guess.) The Anne Rice version of vampires, which has been utilized, bastardized and over-emphasized over the past two decades, appeals to these notions (or lack thereof of these notions) as they are romanticized in such shows as True Blood, Twilight and the like. The fictitious portrayal of the potential for undying love through a modern medium allows the third party recipient a chance to achieve a certain, acceptable level of stimulation and satisfaction of the "I" (ego) without having to worry about the real life ramifications on the "uber I" or super ego (if you buy into the basic concepts of Freudism).

And I get the campyness of the show. However, I do think that it goes overboard and it doesn't have the same level of control and refinement of other HBO produced series with regards to production values, directorial oversight or acting subtleties.

From what I heard, it nearly didn't make it in terms of getting past the first couple of episodes, as it had the lowest initial viewers of any HBO original series. However, I think that the wider ranging social issues (as mentioned above), the popularity of the genre and the "low-brow" approach used in the acting and directing of the show appealed to a broader general viewing audience than what was initially anticipated. Once the "tabloid" publications and internets blogosphere picked up on that, the proverbial ball was rolling.

Crush
06-08-2010, 11:43 AM
yours or his?


Walked right into that one.

Chiefs Rool
06-08-2010, 11:43 AM
how about
1. Men have to work for a living. Working sucks, unless you own your own company you are bound to be miserable at your job. Every woman on earth has the potential to not have to work, they just have to not get fat and look pretty and can always find a rich guy to marry and later divorce and get half of his money.

2. Men don't have any control in any relationship, even though we are the superior species, we let women treat us like crap.

vailpass
06-08-2010, 11:43 AM
Consider it my personification of my inner Sybil(s). If you can't have fun on the intranets, why bother?

Shit, I don't think you are kidding with the things you say.
Then again, who the hell could really be that way?
You are either insane or play a mean game of yank-the-chain.

Ebolapox
06-08-2010, 11:45 AM
how about
1. Men have to work for a living. Working sucks, unless you own your own company you are bound to be miserable at your job. Every woman on earth has the potential to not have to work, they just have to not get fat and look pretty and can always find a rich guy to marry and later divorce and get half of his money.

2. Men don't have any control in any relationship, even though we are the superior species, we let women treat us like crap.

gender, not species. you're a moron. it's not like we're talking about god-damned penguins for fuck's sake.

Saccopoo
06-08-2010, 11:47 AM
You are either insane or play a mean game of yank-the-chain.

Hmmm...I'll have to think about that for a while. Can I get back to you on this?

luv
06-08-2010, 11:50 AM
did u seriously complain about shaving?
Posted via Mobile Device

vailpass
06-08-2010, 11:51 AM
Hmmm...I'll have to think about that for a while. Can I get back to you on this?

By all means, take your time. Perhaps this little verse will help you focus:


Roses are red,
Violets are blue
I'm schizophrenic
And so am I

MOhillbilly
06-08-2010, 11:52 AM
did u seriously complain about shaving?
Posted via Mobile Device

yes he did.

NOW TAKE WHATS LEFT OF HIM!!!!

Chiefs Rool
06-08-2010, 11:53 AM
gender, not species. you're a moron. it's not like we're talking about god-damned penguins for ****'s sake.

oh come on, that's what I meant you don't have to try and correct me. Are you that guy who goes around correcting everyone's grammar?

KCrockaholic
06-08-2010, 11:56 AM
Your balls won't always stink if you shave them. Or if you wash properly.

Rigodan
06-08-2010, 12:04 PM
Things I hate about being a man

1. Pansies that give the rest of a bad name.
2. ....

No, that's pretty much it. Being a man is a great thing. More men need to embrace it and stop being pansies.

Amnorix
06-08-2010, 12:12 PM
It's a standing joke in my house for me to say "reason number XYZ that I'm glad I'm not a woman" in response to some random complaint of my wife's about woman stuff.

I can't fathom the aggravation of being a woman. No thanks.

Johnny Vegas
06-08-2010, 12:13 PM
our balls always stink because we fart sitting down

Pablo
06-08-2010, 12:22 PM
My balls are awesome. So is my dick. I really, really like having both of them. You'll never hear me complain about these things as they are far and away the parts of my anatomy I care the most about. Shave them and wash them; and your balls won't become nasty stench-sacs.

I have to shave; and that kind of sucks. But I can grow handlebars if I want and that kicks ass.

Being a man is about 10,000 x better than the alternative. I don't want to push blood out a hole in my body for a week each month, and I sure as hell don't want to have to wake up in the morning and **** with my hair and make-up for an hour. Shaving might suck sometimes, but it takes about 1/10 of the time of a woman's morning routine.

In short, being a man is ****ing awesome and there is nothing to hate about it.

Plus, I can fart whenever I like and if there is another man within ten feet; he'll either laugh or give me a high five. This is awesome too.

vailpass
06-08-2010, 12:23 PM
Being a man means you can like pussy, enjoy pussy, without having a pussy.
Top shelf.

MoreLemonPledge
06-08-2010, 12:24 PM
I hate not being able to have sex with another man without somebody calling me gay.

OnTheWarpath58
06-08-2010, 12:26 PM
The only thing I hate about being a man?

Hearing other so-called "men" complain about anything about being a "man."

luv
06-08-2010, 12:43 PM
Are you sure you're not a woman?

You complain about having a beard and you complain about shaving it.

Make up your mind!

rad
06-08-2010, 12:49 PM
Regardless, I laughed at the OP.

"We walk briskly to catch the elevator and we're pumping out a stench that rivals the festered ass on a menstruating skunk."

LMAO

Rain Man
06-08-2010, 01:38 PM
Our oppressive society doesn't allow men to loiter inside women's locker rooms.

Detoxing
06-08-2010, 01:44 PM
I dont know about you Sack-of-poo, but my balls smell like Old Spice.

Dayze
06-08-2010, 02:08 PM
In a business casual dress code environment, being required to wear dockers, nice shoes, polo/golf shirts etc..

Meanwhile, females (older ones) where the equivelant of pajamas to work / or sweat suits.

This lady wore fleece pants today with (I sh*t you not) water shoes/sandals, and a zip up hoodie thing.

i think she's the female equivelant to Milton Waddams.

no one is really sure what she does.

luv
06-08-2010, 02:10 PM
In a business casual dress code environment, being required to wear dockers, nice shoes, polo/golf shirts etc..

Meanwhile, females (older ones) where the equivelant of pajamas to work / or sweat suits.

This lady wore fleece pants today with (I sh*t you not) water shoes/sandals, and a zip up hoodie thing.

That sounds like something you need to take up with management.

Iowanian
06-08-2010, 02:10 PM
Did a guy on this website really just complain about having a cock-n-balls?

Silly bitch, you're obviously a natural born bronco fan.



The ONLY downside to being a man I can think of is a prostate exam, anything else and you're just a pussy.

OnTheWarpath58
06-08-2010, 02:13 PM
The only thing I hate about being a man?

Hearing other so-called "men" complain about anything about being a "man."

Did a guy on this website really just complain about having a cock-n-balls?

Silly bitch, you're obviously a natural born bronco fan.



The ONLY downside to being a man I can think of is a prostate exam, anything else and you're just a pussy.

I stand corrected regarding the use of a bolded "anything" in the above post.

Let the record show that "anything but a prostate exam" should have been the verbiage used.

BWillie
06-08-2010, 02:36 PM
I can't beat women. I don't know what the big deal is. That part sucks about being a man. Some chick can throw projectiles at you, attack you, you just have to "take it".

MOhillbilly
06-08-2010, 02:42 PM
I can't beat women. I don't know what the big deal is. That part sucks about being a man. Some chick can throw projectiles at you, attack you, you just have to "take it".

i had a fella tell me that ' punching a girl is like punching a pillow '.

DMAC
06-08-2010, 02:47 PM
6. Ass HairI have to move it out of the way before I shit. It's much easier that way.

morphius
06-08-2010, 03:02 PM
While I hate shaving and extra body hair, NOBODY ever, "enters me", and I don't have a period.

luv
06-08-2010, 03:05 PM
You guys should try having to shave your legs when they're burnt.

Iowanian
06-08-2010, 03:27 PM
You guys should try having to shave your legs when they're burnt.

I'm not queer or a body builder...get out of here with that shit and get me a bomb pop out of the freezer when you're done with the dishes. Thanks.

sedated
06-08-2010, 03:29 PM
In a business casual dress code environment, being required to wear dockers, nice shoes, polo/golf shirts etc..

Meanwhile, females (older ones) where the equivelant of pajamas to work / or sweat suits.

This lady wore fleece pants today with (I sh*t you not) water shoes/sandals, and a zip up hoodie thing.

this seems to be pretty common. women in my office often wear plain-colored t-shirts, cargo pants, and one woman wears crocs every day.

but they also have an unspoken pressure to avoid repeating an outfit for months, whereas men can rotate the same 5 outfits.

luv
06-08-2010, 03:36 PM
I'm not queer or a body builder...get out of here with that shit and get me a bomb pop out of the freezer when you're done with the dishes. Thanks.

Sure thing! I'll also change the channels on the tv for you until you find the remote.

Ebolapox
06-08-2010, 03:37 PM
oh come on, that's what I meant you don't have to try and correct me. Are you that guy who goes around correcting everyone's grammar?

I corrected no grammar. I corrected use of a word: you can argue intent all day long, but who are we to guess that you actually know the (not so) subtle distinction between gender and species? there are a lot of willfully ignorant people out there, you may just be another one for all we know.

BossChief
06-08-2010, 03:42 PM
Did a guy on this website really just complain about having a cock-n-balls?

Silly bitch, you're obviously a natural born bronco fan.



The ONLY downside to being a man I can think of is a prostate exam, anything else and you're just a pussy.

by the sounds of his post, that may be his favorite part...

Pants
06-08-2010, 03:47 PM
The things I hate about being a man? Ummm, that would be NOTHING.

Iowanian
06-08-2010, 03:51 PM
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teedubya
06-08-2010, 03:52 PM
http://www.carnagecorp.com/pub/pictures/thread-is-gay.jpg

FAX
06-08-2010, 03:58 PM
Dang, Mr. Saccopoo. That's quite a list. Perhaps you should consider the "Ms. Ultra Peanut" solution to your woes?

FAX

KurtCobain
06-08-2010, 04:07 PM
how about
1. Men have to work for a living. Working sucks, unless you own your own company you are bound to be miserable at your job. Every woman on earth has the potential to not have to work, they just have to not get fat and look pretty and can always find a rich guy to marry and later divorce and get half of his money.

2. Men don't have any control in any relationship, even though we are the superior species, we let women treat us like crap.

Sounds like you have a shitty home life.

Saccopoo
06-08-2010, 04:28 PM
Dang, Mr. Saccopoo. That's quite a list. Perhaps you should consider the "Ms. Ultra Peanut" solution to your woes?

FAX

Does her diet remove back hair?

LaChapelle
06-08-2010, 04:51 PM
The price of button fly jeans

stevieray
06-08-2010, 05:25 PM
1.this thread
2.this thread
3.this thread
4.this thread
5.this thread
6.this thread
7.this thread
8.this thread
9.this thread
10.this thread

redhed
06-08-2010, 05:36 PM
The Metrostink in the 1p is so strong, you can smell it from google spider.
Either shave or don't.

FAX
06-08-2010, 05:38 PM
The important thing is that you learn to love yourself for who you are, Mr. Saccopoo.

Even though you might have back hair. Even though you might stink like a long-dead, diseased rat. Even though you might awaken in a strange room and embarrass yourself by blindly searching for a bathroom in the middle of the night causing you to jam your enormous erection clear through an interior wall like some kind of human jackhammer with a super powered penis of steel, you have to just accept yourself.

FAX

Sweet Daddy Hate
06-08-2010, 06:36 PM
I can not relate to this thread.

boogblaster
06-08-2010, 07:01 PM
I hate nothing of manhood .. I was blessed being a man .....

ArrowheadHawk
06-08-2010, 07:15 PM
http://www.funnyforumpics.com/forums/this-thread-sucks/11/Thread-Gay-Disturbing.jpg

Pestilence
06-08-2010, 07:24 PM
I feel sorry for the poor, testosterone challenged schmucks who can't grow one, but it's a pain in the ass, whether you grow one or choose not to grow one. Why you ask? Because:


What's funny is those poor, testosterone challenged schmucks that you feel sorry for......more than likely feel sorry for you because you're a bitch who doesn't like being a man.

threebag02
06-08-2010, 07:24 PM
Do you towel your asshole when HE is done or do you just let it ooze out while you sleep?

ArrowheadHawk
06-08-2010, 10:02 PM
Do you towel your asshole when HE is done or do you just let it ooze out while you sleep?

ROFL

Thig Lyfe
06-08-2010, 11:21 PM
http://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gif
http://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gif
http://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gif
http://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gifhttp://i47.tinypic.com/vl64h_th.gif

Saccopoo
06-08-2010, 11:59 PM
While I hate shaving and extra body hair, NOBODY ever, "enters me", and I don't have a period.

The period thing would suck, but when I think about it, she always seems to get a lot more "umph" and enjoyment out of the "entering" part than I did. At least initially. Actually, not even initially. Almost the whole time up until climax. Or at least my climax.

So, thinking about it, maybe the "entering" thing is actually not so bad...

Just thinking about it from a alternate reality perspective you know...

Saccopoo
06-09-2010, 12:01 AM
The important thing is that you learn to love yourself for who you are, Mr. Saccopoo.

Even though you might have back hair. Even though you might stink like a long-dead, diseased rat. Even though you might awaken in a strange room and embarrass yourself by blindly searching for a bathroom in the middle of the night causing you to jam your enormous erection clear through an interior wall like some kind of human jackhammer with a super powered penis of steel, you have to just accept yourself.

FAX

But can't we all dream, just a little FAX? Just a little?

Saccopoo
06-09-2010, 12:16 AM
What's funny is those poor, testosterone challenged schmucks that you feel sorry for......more than likely feel sorry for you because you're a bitch who doesn't like being a man.

Pest, you poor, sorry bastard. This wasn't a post to denigrate you personally. I didn't mean to castigate you individually because you can't grow a beard, or back hair, or either one.

And I love being a man. Love it. I embrace my manhood with utter, uber menschness.

All I was saying is that, as a man, I am faced with certain things that the rest of society doesn't realize as situational problemalities that are gender based in context.

A surplus of body hair, ingrown hair on such surplusness, jangley delicate reproductive organs, body stink...

These things are things that are a man's burden. If I could change human physiological evolution and give these "gifts" to the female of the species...

Perhaps I would.

Perhaps not.

Perhaps it was a commentary on the current North American trend of physical perfection as a media centered idiosyncrasy.

Maybe, just maybe, I'm completely secure in myself and wanted to see how many insecure men were on this board who would obviously overreact to such a post.

Maybe I was so enthralled with the "Why I Like to be a Man" post that I threw out a point/counterpoint post that embraced manhood in all it's manhoodiness, but yet went so far to the opposite extreme that it so invoked a stern, (a)typical reaction from this board that we expected to achieve, which was obviously achieved.

Phobia
06-09-2010, 12:29 AM
Maybe, just maybe, I'm completely secure in myself and wanted to see how many insecure men were on this board who would obviously overreact to such a post.


I'm completely insecure. Definitely. But I don't have a problem with passive aggressiveness. It's my mother's favorite technique so I'm well accustomed.

Thig Lyfe
06-09-2010, 12:41 AM
Maybe, just maybe, I'm completely secure in myself and wanted to see how many insecure men were on this board who would obviously overreact to such a post.


Spazzing out over anything that approaches or even hints at something other than strict heteronormativity is par for the course for CP.

BWillie
06-09-2010, 01:07 AM
I don't understand why women bitch about shaving their legs. Most women have very little hair on their legs to begin w/ or it's not very thick and it comes off w/ ease. I have a steel bristled forest of beard hair that I HAVE to shave w/ the grain first and then kind of side ways not against the grain otherwise I bleed all to hell. Then I can't shave for at least two more days. If I shave w/ the grain only, people bitch that I didn't even shave.

Phobia
06-09-2010, 01:08 AM
Spazzing out over anything that approaches or even hints at something other than strict heteronormativity is par for the course for CP.

Way to stick up for your boyfriend, Cowboy.

Sweet Daddy Hate
06-09-2010, 03:19 PM
Way to stick up for your boyfriend, Cowboy.

ROFL

Pushead2
06-09-2010, 03:32 PM
what a fag

threebag02
06-10-2010, 07:30 PM
Remember to pull your tampon before you run to first. We don't want you to trip and scrape your delicate little knees.

thurman merman
06-10-2010, 08:43 PM
1. Facial Hair
- Sure, it makes a man a man, and I feel sorry for the poor, testosterone challenged schmucks who can't grow one, but it's a pain in the ass, whether you grow one or choose not to grow one. Why you ask? Because:

a. Ingrown hairs in my beard.
- Try digging out a pile of six or seven barbed wire thick stubs that have decided to get together and wreak havoc on your epidermal. Then try doing that while working your way through a forest of growth that's thicker and less forgiving than the Congo underbrush. And they are usually in places where you can reach, see and subsequently self-operate on like some 17th century Turkish field medic.

b. The Stink
- Beards stink. Dead skin. Leftover food particles. Gruel that seeps in from the corners of your mouth that trickles out as you sleep. Liquids - of various kinds. You just can't wash all that shit out from a full beard - ever.

c. The Shave
- Chicks cry long and hard about having to shave their legs. Boo ****ing hoo. You can put on pants, hose or whatever. You don't even have to shave the goddamn things. Try taking a sharp as hell razor to your most visible and noticeable part of your body every goddamn day. And then having to worry about if that razor was just used by your chick on her legs and your face end up looking like a teenage extra from a Halloween XIX flick.

d. Blowing your nose
- Try cleaning that shit up properly with a full beard and mustache.

2. Balls
- They might as well have two Faberge eggs down there, right out in front, as awkwardly placed as possible. At least other animal species properly evolved so that they ran on all fours and their best stuff was somewhat protected.

3. Penis
- Super. Girls get a nice rack and their sex ugly tucked up and hidden from view. Guys get this floppy, dangly hunk of meat wiggling around. And try living with this thing through your junior high and high school years and attempting to figure out how you are going to hide the boner you just got every six minutes or so.

4. Man Stink
- Guys smell. Bad. Like exponentially worse than chicks. We walk briskly to catch the elevator and we're pumping out a stench that rivals the festered ass on a menstruating skunk. Our feet get funky within minutes of confinement. And our balls always stink, no matter how many times a day we wash them, which isn't many. In fact, most guy never really properly wash their balls anyway.

5. Back Hair
- While the ability of a man to grow a full beard is nearly the pinnacle of "manliness," a guy who is able to grow a shag rub on the top of his traps is a wonder to behold. Women love to run their fingers through this man forest. They love to have us lie on our stomachs and pour baby oil over our lats and lovingly massage the thick pubic like clumps of hair, swirling it into patterns and vague geometric shapes that would have made Jackson Pollack proud.

6. Being expected to catch softballs that are hit to third base.

The Bad Guy
06-10-2010, 09:02 PM
Saccoshit cries like a bitch little girl constantly on this board. I'm amazed he doesn't have a huge set of beef curtains.

luv
06-10-2010, 09:04 PM
Remember to pull your tampon before you run to first. We don't want you to trip and scrape your delicate little knees.

Tripping on his tampon? That's a long string.

threebag02
06-11-2010, 07:18 PM
Thanks Luv, it's proportionate.

ChiefButthurt
06-11-2010, 07:25 PM
Ain't that the truth. About once a month I've got to take a pairing knife and try to cut through the tangles and knots in my ass crack as they get all worked together and start pulling each other out. That's some uncomfortable shit right there.

I call bullshit.

Guru
06-12-2010, 04:36 AM
to all who bitch.
your man card revocation notice is in the mail.THIS