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vailpass
06-22-2010, 05:05 PM
North Korean Soccer Coach Talks to 'Dear Leader' Via Invisible Phone
Hundreds of Chinese Hired to Root for North Korea at World Cup
By RUSSELL GOLDMAN
June 17, 2010


The North Koreans know a thing or two about secret programs, and the country's latest claim is a mysterious phone that allows Dear Leader Kim Jong-il help coach the team from afar.

North Korean manager Kim Jong-Hun reportedly gets coaching advice directly from the country's diminutive dictator via an invisible cell phone.

According to ESPN.com the coach has claimed he gets "regular tactical advice during matches" from Jong Il "using mobile phones that are not visible to the naked eye."

"Jong Il is said to have developed the technology himself," coach told ESPN.com.

While the stealth phone might be the latest of the North Korean leader's inventions -- in 2004 he claimed to have invented the hamburger -- it's just one in a series of oddball details to emerge from the country's first presence at the World Cup tournament in 44 years.

Trying to recreate some of the magic that led them to an historic victory over Italy the in 1966 World Cup, the North Koreans played No.1-ranked Brazil on Tuesday.

While losing to Brazil, the underdogs managed a face saving showing, 2-1 score.

Cameras caught a contingent of North Korean supporters in the stands cheering eagerly, each dressed exactly the same in a red shirt and cap and waving North Korean flags.

It's not certain, however, that any of those flag waving fans were North Korean.

In May, 1,000 Chinese nationals were essentially rented by the government of North Korea to sit in the stands and cheer, according to Xinhua, the official Chinese news agency.

Given that few citizens of the impoverished nation could afford to attend the games, or would be allowed to leave the country, the North Korean Sports Committee gave tickets to Chinese nationals, many of them actors and singers, to attend the event, Xinhua reported.


North Korean World Cup Team Brags of 'Self Reliance'
Additional tickets were sold to Chinese willing to support North Korea, according to Reuters.

In addition to the fans, the team's star player is also a foreigner impersonating a North Korean.

On Tuesday, striker Jong Tae-se became the international symbol of North Korean patriotic fealty when a television camera caught him weeping as the North Korean anthem played before the game. The only problem with that story: Tae-se isn't North Korean.

Born and raised in Japan to South Korean parents, the striker has never lived in North Korea and plays for a Japanese pro team. Each time he plays for the North Korean side, he goes to the North Korean embassy in Tokyo and turns in his South Korean passport for a North Korean one.

When he returns to Japan, he goes back to the embassy and switches passports again.

Nevertheless, North Koreans are proud that at least their coach is one of their own, said Han Park, director of the Center for the Study of Global Issues at the University of Georgia.

"They are proud of fact they did not employ a foreign coach. They didn't spend a dime on that. It is their own knowledge of the game, their own skill," he said.

A mixture of what Han called "the principal of self reliance" and just "not having any money" led the North Koreans to become inadvertent viral video stars.

Where many of the foreign teams who arrived in South Africa arranged for private training facilities with state of the art equipment, the broke North Koreans opted for using a public health club.

A video posted to YouTube shows the team working out at a South African gym, as confused patrons look on and fascinated players ask South African gym-goers to pose for photographs.

So far no North Koreans back home have seen any of the games, and those hoping to catch a glimpse of the competition must wait as the deal to bring live coverage of the cup came apart in the wake of a military dispute between North and South Korea.

South Korea yanked its agreement to provide free television broadcasts of the games to the North following the sinking of a South Korean navy ship in March.


North Korea Lost Coverage of World Cup After Sinking of South Korean Ship
A tape of Tuesday's game against Brazil will likely be shown on state-run television since North Korea secured broadcast rights to World Cup telecasts from the Asia-Pacific Broadcasting Union.

"The hype around the World Cup is not the same in North Korea as in open societies," said Han Park, director of the Center for the Study of Global Issues at the University of Georgia.

"The average person is not very well informed of these games," Han said. "To the extent that they have a reason to be proud, the leadership will selectively reveal information to the people."

All media in North Korea is tightly controlled. Only a small number of people own televisions. In the capital Pyongyang, all homes come equipped with state-produced radios which cannot be turned off.

North Korea was selected to play in Group G, the so-called "Group of Death" that includes some of the world's best squads including Brazil, Portugal and Cote d'Ivoire.

They next play Portugal on June 21.



Copyright 2010 ABC News Internet Ventures

Donger
06-22-2010, 05:10 PM
I've heard that he's also an "Internet expert," has fresh lobsters flown in to his train daily (doesn't like to fly), is a movie buff (something like 15,000 movies in his collection) and has a penchant for cognac.

Oh, and he's bat-sh*t crazy as well with a physics package (albeit a crappy one).

chefsos
06-22-2010, 05:13 PM
A tape of Tuesday's game against Brazil will likely be shown on state-run televisionAfter some ham-handed editing, no doubt. They'll go home with some fucking dollar store punch bowl and tell their people it's the World Cup.

KCUnited
06-22-2010, 05:26 PM
Substitute "North Korea" with "Oakland", "Chinese nationals" with "Work release program" and this article could've been about Al Davis.

Crush
06-22-2010, 05:31 PM
http://www.tribalfootball.com/north-korea-chose-7-0-thrashing-first-live-broadcast-925341

North Korea chose 7-0 thrashing for first live broadcast

23.06.10 | Ian Ferris
READ MORE NEWS ON: Cristiano Ronaldo (http://www.tribalfootball.com/category/leagues/spanish-liga/real-madrid/cristiano-ronaldo), Ronaldo (http://www.tribalfootball.com/category/leagues/spanish-liga/real-madrid/ronaldo), World Cup (http://www.tribalfootball.com/category/leagues/world-cup)
<iframe allowtransparency="true" class="iframe-ad szcwaekbncjxmqtktaxc szcwaekbncjxmqtktaxc szcwaekbncjxmqtktaxc" src="http://www.tribalfootball.com/sites/default/files/iframe_ads/e626f4007f8a316ae7cfe18730126a80.html" style="border: 0pt none;" width="300" frameborder="0" height="250" scrolling="no"></iframe>
North Korea carried the <abbr title="">World Cup (http://www.tribalfootball.com/category/leagues/world-cup)</abbr> clash with Portugal live but a hail of goals from the European side left the commentator speechless, South Korean media reported.

A commentator expressed disappointment when Portugal scored their first goal 29 minutes into the first half, according to South Korean media that monitored the broadcast.

The North Koreans should have been more alive to the forward threat posed by <abbr title="">Cristiano Ronaldo (http://www.tribalfootball.com/category/leagues/spanish-liga/real-madrid/cristiano-ronaldo)</abbr>'s team, he said. "If we play our own style of game, we will be able to score."

The hopes were soon to be shattered. Portugal added an avalanche of six goals in the second half to knock the scoreless North out of the tournament.

The broadcast ended immediately after the final whistle.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-22-2010, 05:34 PM
I'd love to get my hands on one of those invisible phones, err, I mean not visible to the naked eye phones.

GoHuge
06-22-2010, 05:37 PM
Oh I wish the "Supreme Leader" would pull a Jim Jones on himself and his entire crew. I get so sick of them saying they are going to annihilate the US and South Korea. Wish some country would call bullshit and smoke their ass. I can't believe every country in the world listens to this moron in high heels shaking his fist while doing whatever the hell he wants. I feel terrible for the people of the country, but we need to continue to sanction these bastards into the Stone age until they straighten up. The sad part about it is the citizens (use that term loosely) of North Korea think the United States is the devil and the only information they recieve is shovel fed by the minister of propaganda. They have no clue what the world is about.

mikey23545
06-22-2010, 05:40 PM
All media in North Korea is tightly controlled. In the capital Pyongyang, all homes come equipped with state-produced radios which cannot be turned off.


God, don't let Obama see this idea.

Lonewolf Ed
06-22-2010, 05:47 PM
This invisible phone is merely the first step in his development of an invisible DEATH RAY GUN!! We must surrender to the North Korean super genuis now, while we still have some quality of life left. Kimchi, anyone?

Rain Man
06-22-2010, 06:01 PM
the kims are (were) a two-man army. is there nothing they can't do?
Posted via Mobile Device

R&GHomer
06-22-2010, 06:19 PM
LOL.... Invisible phone. Every time I think Kim Il has reached the pinnacle of stupidity he goes and raises the bar. That country is so screwed.

Ebolapox
06-22-2010, 06:23 PM
he must give shitty advice.

vailpass
06-22-2010, 06:46 PM
LOL.... Invisible phone. Every time I think Kim Il has reached the pinnacle of stupidity he goes and raises the bar. That country is so screwed.

He's great isn't he? It's hard to believe he's real. Dude is a walking parody/stereotype/lampoon.

Like the time he got 4 holes-in-one the first time he played golf.

And everyone around him is so scared of him they go along with his batshit-crazy like it was the truth.

Marcellus
06-22-2010, 07:21 PM
All media in North Korea is tightly controlled. In the capital Pyongyang, all homes come equipped with state-produced radios which cannot be turned off.


God, don't let Obama see this idea.

Ummm, unplug it?

CrazyPhuD
06-22-2010, 07:27 PM
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Sam Hall
06-22-2010, 07:40 PM
I wrote a 30-page paper about North Korea, and the things I found were appalling. Kim's Internet connection is stolen from China. That country has no infrastructure whatsoever and there are concentration camps. There's also famine everywhere and most citizens can't afford shoes. People have been executed in that country for making international phone calls.

memyselfI
06-22-2010, 07:45 PM
I just hope those players don't suffer because of their poor performance on the soccer field.

GoHuge
06-22-2010, 10:35 PM
I just hope those players don't suffer because of their poor performance on the soccer field.Well at least it's not as bad as Iraq. Saddam's sons use to make soccer players jump off of water towers and break their legs for losing a match. You want to talk about incentive to win!! Glad those fuckers are taking dirt naps.

googlegoogle
06-23-2010, 03:20 AM
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Pants
06-23-2010, 11:05 AM
The invisible phone must've been broken during the Portugal match. Dear Leader couldn't give the coach tactical help and the poor guys lust 7-0.

vailpass
06-23-2010, 11:32 AM
The invisible phone must've been broken during the Portugal match. Dear Leader couldn't give the coach tactical help and the poor guys lust 7-0.

No doubt. Was it the phone that was see-through or North Korea's goal keeper?