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View Full Version : Life No one is safe. Scary family story.


Count Zarth
07-03-2010, 06:03 PM
So I had a phone conversation with my uncle today, and it was pretty scary. It made me realize that even if you think you are safe and nothing bad could ever happen to you, shit can still go down. It's a scary world we live in.

My aunt and uncle live in an upper-middle-class neighborhood. They are surrounded by well-off people, lots of families. There is a high school not a mile down the road. There is a police and fire station right around the corner. Basically they live around lots of rich white people who have never committed a felony in their life, in one of the safest suburbs in America. They are about as far away from the ghetto as you can get short of living in a private, gated community.

Last Wednesday morning my uncle was robbed at gunpoint.

In his own driveway.

It was 5:30 AM and he was getting in his truck. He had his back turned to the street, when he heard someone say "turn around, please."

He turned around and a 6-2, 300-pound black man wearing a ski mask was standing in the driveway. At first, my uncle thought it was some kind of joke, or a SWAT team was in the area and taking care of a problem. When he realized it wasn't, and realized the guy had a gun, he told the guy "get out of here."

The thief pointed the gun at my uncle and asked him for the money in his wallet. My uncle gave him $40, and then the thief said "get in your car. We're going to the ATM."

Knowing that getting in a car with this guy and going anywhere probably wasn't a great idea, my uncle activated the alarm on his car. The thief then produced a knife and brandished it at my uncle, telling him to turn off the alarm. He did so.

Clearly, this guy wasn't going to be chased off so easily. But my uncle still wasn't dumb enough to get in a car and go anywhere with a criminal. This is where he apparently began thinking about how to escape the situation.

"My debit card is inside."

He led the thief inside. Then, as he passed the window of the room where his dog sleeps, he shouted the words "BAD GUYS!" This is the command for his dog to go berserk.

As soon as his dog went off, barking so loudly and angrily it woke up the neighbors, he ran for his bedroom, slammed the door, and grabbed his shotgun. He pointed it at the closed door and yelled "IF YOU TRY TO COME THROUGH THIS DOOR, I WILL SHOOT TO KILL."

The dog stopped barking and my uncle came out of the bedroom (after his wife called 911). The thief was gone. The police arrived, but were unable to find the escaping thief despite the fact they had secured the neighborhood exits (there's a small forest that leads to a back road behind my uncle's house, that's probably where the guy went).

Anyway, my uncle was lucky to escape only $40 poorer. His dog was praised by the police, and his neighbor now owns a mastiff. Other neighbors bought guns. My uncle and aunt are getting concealed weapon permits and installed new lighting around their home. Now my aunt watches my uncle leave for work with a gun in one hand and a phone in the other.

Because even in one of the safest neighborhoods in America, you can be robbed at gunpoint IN YOUR OWN DRIVEWAY.

gblowfish
07-03-2010, 06:06 PM
I kinda wondered what Ryan Sims was up to these days....

Glad your Uncle was unharmed. I'm afraid crime is going to get a lot worse with so many people out of work now.

LetsSignRussell
07-03-2010, 06:07 PM
bugeater?

Bacon Cheeseburger
07-03-2010, 06:07 PM
black man
http://creepygif.com/images/full/10.gif

MIAdragon
07-03-2010, 06:10 PM
WTF the guy already had a gun on him and THEN pulled a knife? I also call BS on the cat asking for him to turn around "please".

LetsSignRussell
07-03-2010, 06:11 PM
and the dog having a "bad guy" command :spock:

Count Zarth
07-03-2010, 06:11 PM
WTF the guy already had a gun on him and THEN pulled a knife? I also call BS on the cat asking for him to turn around "please".

What do you want to bet the gun wasn't even loaded?

CrazyPhuD
07-03-2010, 06:12 PM
It was obama, he needed some more money to fund some welfare projects for illegal immigrants.

DeezNutz
07-03-2010, 06:12 PM
Fortunately, your uncle had the four things that no man should be without:

A pair of balls.
Quick wit.
A good dog.
And a loaded gun.

Count Zarth
07-03-2010, 06:14 PM
Fortunately, your uncle had the four things that no man should be without:

A pair of balls.
Quick wit.
A good dog.
And a loaded gun.

Yeah I was pretty amazed he thought that clearly through it, he's never been held at gunpoint before, or served in the military. He said he didn't even have an adrenaline crash. He went to work later that morning. ROFL

Buck
07-03-2010, 06:15 PM
Damn. Scary stuff there dude.

Bane
07-03-2010, 06:18 PM
He's a fucking idiot for pulling a knife out after already having a gun.......Your uncle should have made him eat both of them.

Count Zarth
07-03-2010, 06:19 PM
He's a fucking idiot for pulling a knife out after already having a gun.......Your uncle should have made him eat both of them.

Uncle is not exactly a trained martial artist. He could pass as a sumo wrestler, though.

kstater
07-03-2010, 06:26 PM
JW's carry guns?

The attention whore is strong with this one.

Count Zarth
07-03-2010, 06:29 PM
JW's carry guns?


Some do. Why not?

CosmicPal
07-03-2010, 07:05 PM
His dog was praised by the police, and his neighbor now owns a mastiff. Other neighbors bought guns. My uncle and aunt are getting concealed weapon permits and installed new lighting around their home. Now my aunt watches my uncle leave for work with a gun in one hand and a phone in the other.



The whole neighborhood is going crazy over one incident. Why don't they just build a moat around the neighborhood and fill it with with electric eels and gators while they're at it.

Mr. Flopnuts
07-03-2010, 07:19 PM
I'm sorry to hear it dude. It's crazy out there right now. You know what went down at my place a month ago.

cabletech94
07-03-2010, 07:24 PM
how did a black dude get into a white neighborhood?

weird?























c'mon, i'm joking.
still waiting for the gochiefs punchline.

Bane
07-03-2010, 07:27 PM
how did a black dude get into a white neighborhood?

weird?























c'mon, i'm joking.
still waiting for the gochiefs punchline.




I was waiting for......Yeah right,like a black guy would say please.ROFL

Phobia
07-03-2010, 07:33 PM
Clearly, your uncle had to account for the 2 lap-dances he'd experienced the night before. Great story.

cdcox
07-03-2010, 07:42 PM
The whole neighborhood is going crazy over one incident. Why don't they just build a moat around the neighborhood and fill it with with electric eels and gators while they're at it.

I'd fill the moat with anti-freeze and pit bulls. The pit bulls might need scuba suits, though.

BWillie
07-03-2010, 08:00 PM
I probably would have just ran. Chances are I'm faster than a 300 lbs dude. But then again, he's black. Tough predicament. What a pickle.

Hog Farmer
07-03-2010, 08:24 PM
I wish to God that would happen to me ! I haven't killed anything in months.

BigChiefFan
07-03-2010, 08:29 PM
Fortunately, your uncle had the four things that no man should be without:

A pair of balls.
Quick wit.
A good dog.
And a loaded gun.
Sounds like the prerequesites of a John Wayne movie.

BTW, that's good advice.

milkman
07-03-2010, 09:52 PM
I wish to God that would happen to me ! I haven't killed anything in months.

Come on.

We all know you're a pig lover, not a fighter.

FAX
07-03-2010, 10:50 PM
I was at a baseball game tonight. Our seats were in the reserved section on the first base line. In the top of the fourth, a young girl who was seated in the row just in front of me pulled up her top and flashed her bra-clad tittahs at the players on the field. This was reserved seating. Not general admission. The seats had backs. No obstructions. Mr. GoChiefs is right. No one is safe. Anywhere.

FAX

Psyko Tek
07-03-2010, 11:44 PM
I wish to God that would happen to me ! I haven't killed anything in months.

go kill a 6 pack
you'll feel better

teedubya
07-04-2010, 12:31 AM
I was at a baseball game tonight. Our seats were in the reserved section on the first base line. In the top of the fourth, a young girl who was seated in the row just in front of me pulled up her top and flashed her bra-clad tittahs at the players on the field. This was reserved seating. Not general admission. The seats had backs. No obstructions. Mr. GoChiefs is right. No one is safe. Anywhere.

FAX


OH THE HUMANITY!!!!

Lonewolf Ed
07-04-2010, 12:42 AM
and the dog having a "bad guy" command :spock:

"Rend" or "savage" is a much better command.

Fat Elvis
07-04-2010, 10:07 AM
Yeah, right....

Let's get the facts straight.

Instead of "black guy," try "pastey white guy who likes to post pictures of himself on male modelling sites"....

...and instead of "uncle," insert, "old lady"...

...and rather than "driveway," go with, "cart path on the golf course near my house"...

...and lets be honest, it wasn't, "ran away," it was, "got my ass handed to me by that old lady"...

...and the neighbors didn't go out to buy guns, did they? They went out to get new video cameras so that they can hopefully catch you pulling that shit next time and posting it on YouTube.

-King-
07-04-2010, 10:14 AM
Yeah, right....

Let's get the facts straight.

Instead of "black guy," try "pastey white guy who likes to post pictures of himself on male modelling sites"....

...and instead of "uncle," insert, "old lady"...

...and rather than "driveway," go with, "cart path on the golf course near my house"...

...and lets be honest, it wasn't, "ran away," it was, "got my ass handed to me by that old lady"...

...and the neighbors didn't go out to buy guns, did they? They went out to get new video cameras so that they can hopefully catch you pulling that shit next time and posting it on YouTube.

:LOL:ROFL

Sweet Daddy Hate
07-04-2010, 12:44 PM
At least the robber said "please"...

mikeyis4dcats.
07-05-2010, 08:14 AM
what a pathetic lie

Sweet Daddy Hate
07-05-2010, 08:22 AM
what a pathetic lie

If that GC's Uncle, I've got a 40 and some Wings on Snap Delivery!

Bwana
07-05-2010, 08:55 AM
I'd fill the moat with anti-freeze and pit bulls. The pit bulls might need scuba suits, though.

Good plan, but don't forget about about the burning aids trees! If the guy gets past the pits and the anti-freeze, the aids trees will get him every time.

boogblaster
07-05-2010, 09:52 AM
12 gauge pump

Tylerthigpen!1!
07-05-2010, 11:10 AM
Good plan, but don't forget about about the burning aids trees! If the guy gets past the pits and the anti-freeze, the aids trees will get him every time.

Where do the nuthooks fit in?

Useful Idiot
07-05-2010, 11:18 AM
story needs more explosions and bewbs.

Bwana
07-05-2010, 12:50 PM
Where do the nuthooks fit in?

You use the nut hooks right after you catch the thug and before the aids tree gets the better of him. Hell, I guess you could also whip out the hooks and hang him from the aids tree before it burns as well, as a solid "plan B". :shrug: