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View Full Version : Food and Drink RANT: Alabama ABC can kiss my fuckin' ass, rat bastard giant pieces of shit.


Fried Meat Ball!
12-17-2011, 08:42 PM
Fucking Alabama laws... for $20, I can legally conceal and carry a firearm just by showing the sheriff's department my driver's license once a year.

But the fucking ABC board won't let me get WINE shipped to my house. If I want a shipment from a vineyard, I have to file paperwork every time I want it done, then I have to have it shipped to an ABC store where I can pay them tax.

Fuck them!

I'm seriously debating rejoining my wine of the month club and having it shipped to my parents in Missouri.

:#

Fried Meat Ball!
12-17-2011, 08:43 PM
File this under "I miss my wine of the month club, and I'm pissy about it."

notorious
12-17-2011, 08:43 PM
Stop wining.

milkman
12-17-2011, 08:45 PM
File this under "I miss my wine of the month club, and I'm pissy about it."

I'd say stop your wining.

Fried Meat Ball!
12-17-2011, 08:45 PM
Apparently, I'm responsible enough to carry a FREAKING GUN in my pants, but I can't get wine shipped to me.

Fried Meat Ball!
12-17-2011, 08:45 PM
I'd say stop your wining.

Repost.

milkman
12-17-2011, 08:45 PM
Stop wining.

Fuck you.

Fuck you right in the ass with a dirty toilet brush.

milkman
12-17-2011, 08:46 PM
Apparently, I'm responsible enough to carry a FREAKING GUN in my pants, but I can't get wine shipped to me.

So, does your wife ever ask "Is that a gun in your pants?"

Fried Meat Ball!
12-17-2011, 08:47 PM
So, does your wife ever ask "Is that a gun in your pants?"

Sometimes. Occasionally she'll ask if it's cocked.

notorious
12-17-2011, 08:47 PM
**** you.

**** you right in the ass with a dirty toilet brush.


Frisky mood tonight? LMAO

Frazod
12-17-2011, 08:48 PM
SEC! SEC!

Demonpenz
12-17-2011, 08:48 PM
sorry for your loss

Kyle DeLexus
12-17-2011, 08:49 PM
Simple solution is to go with a Jelly of the Month Club instead.

notorious
12-17-2011, 08:51 PM
Simple solution is to go with a Jelly of the Month Club instead.

K-Y?


We might need it tomorrow when GB comes to town.

milkman
12-17-2011, 08:53 PM
Sometimes. Occasionally she'll ask if it's cocked.

Sorry that she has to ask that.

Tried Viagara?

milkman
12-17-2011, 08:53 PM
K-Y?


We might need it tomorrow when GB comes to town.

LMAO

Kyle DeLexus
12-17-2011, 08:56 PM
K-Y?


We might need it tomorrow when GB comes to town.

I was thinking blueberry, raspberry, or something like that, but whatever floats your boat.

Buck
12-17-2011, 08:57 PM
Welcome to most states in the union.

Gonzo
12-17-2011, 08:57 PM
What does the local tv station have to do with making liquor laws?
Posted via Mobile Device

Bearcat
12-17-2011, 09:00 PM
I'm seriously debating rejoining my wine of the month club and having it shipped to my parents in Missouri.

:#

#whitepeopleproblems

notorious
12-17-2011, 09:01 PM
FMB, you're in Ala-fucking-Bama.


http://ts4.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=1504205474943&id=887ad0946ca6ac20b2560ab421f0bfa9

Fried Meat Ball!
12-17-2011, 09:04 PM
What does the local tv station have to do with making liquor laws?
Posted via Mobile Device

Alcoholic Beverage Control (ABC)

Fried Meat Ball!
12-17-2011, 09:06 PM
Welcome to most states in the union.

Wrong, there's only like 13 states that disallow direct shipments.

Rain Man
12-17-2011, 09:08 PM
This is probably the worst thing about Alabama.

Buck
12-17-2011, 09:10 PM
Wrong, there's only like 13 states that disallow direct shipments.

I meant by electoral votes.

RJ
12-17-2011, 09:29 PM
Start a bumper sticker campaign.

"You can have my pinot noir when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers"

You gotta use tactics those people understand.

Rain Man
12-17-2011, 09:34 PM
What if you buy wine that has a rebel flag on the label? It seems like they'd allow that.

Captain Obvious
12-17-2011, 09:42 PM
That damn Obama...

RJ
12-17-2011, 09:43 PM
What if you buy wine that has a rebel flag on the label? It seems like they'd allow that.

Wine is also permissible if the bottle will fit on your pickup's gun rack.

KC Tattoo
12-17-2011, 09:46 PM
I was thinking blueberry, raspberry, or something like that, but whatever floats your boat.

There's only one man who would dare to give me the raspberry~ Lonestar!!

teedubya
12-17-2011, 10:23 PM
RIP Wine. :(

Ebolapox
12-17-2011, 10:24 PM
would you like some cheese with that....wine?

Guru
12-17-2011, 10:27 PM
When did you move to Alabama?

Caseyguyrr
12-17-2011, 10:28 PM
move to missouri, they honestly dont give a shit what you do

Rain Man
12-17-2011, 10:32 PM
Wine is also permissible if the bottle will fit on your pickup's gun rack.

That seems reasonable. Good safety policy.

Gonzo
12-18-2011, 12:08 AM
Alcoholic Beverage Control (ABC)

http://i563.photobucket.com/albums/ss80/Gonzo_photos/Smle.jpg
Posted via Mobile Device

Baby Lee
12-18-2011, 03:09 AM
Simple solution is to go with a Jelly of the Month Club instead.

Or syrup, I prefer jelly.

|Zach|
12-18-2011, 03:13 AM
SEC! SEC!

LMAO

Fried Meat Ball!
12-18-2011, 06:16 AM
When did you move to Alabama?

August 2010.

move to missouri, they honestly dont give a shit what you do

Lived there for more than 20 years, I know.

rageeumr
12-18-2011, 06:47 AM
FMB, you're part of the problem. People have been saying "FUCK THE ABC'S" for years in Alabama, and that's how you end up here:

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/305395/thumbs/r-EDUCATION-RANKINGS-large570.jpg

Luke
12-18-2011, 07:11 AM
Perhaps you should consider making your own wine? It is a fairly simple process. With a little practice you can graduate to clear liquid involving copper tubing.

Fried Meat Ball!
12-18-2011, 08:10 AM
FMB, you're part of the problem. People have been saying "**** THE ABC'S" for years in Alabama, and that's how you end up here:

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/305395/thumbs/r-EDUCATION-RANKINGS-large570.jpg

http://s3.amazonaws.com/kym-assets/photos/images/original/000/000/681/what-you-did-there-i-see-it.thumbnail.jpg

Guru
12-18-2011, 08:26 AM
August 2010.



Lived there for more than 20 years, I know.What happened to the gig you had in SC?

Fried Meat Ball!
12-18-2011, 08:44 AM
What happened to the gig you had in SC?

Still with the same company, but promoted to corporate. Corp HQ is in Alabama.

RedNeckRaider
12-18-2011, 08:45 AM
I moved to North Carolina in Aug of 2010 and the south is a very different place. When I first moved here I had no idea what an ABC store was. The 2nd time I went to one was on a Saturday night. I pulled in at 7:05 pm and was stunned to find out it was closed until Monday. Yep here in Kinston they don't want people buying liquor at all hours of the night! I also tried moonshine for the first time and it packs a punch although it tastes terrible. The locals make it with peaches and other fruits that I am told tastes much better. I will take their word for it :eek:

Guru
12-18-2011, 09:21 AM
Still with the same company, but promoted to corporate. Corp HQ is in Alabama.

thats great FMB. Congrats!!!

Fried Meat Ball!
12-18-2011, 09:29 AM
thats great FMB. Congrats!!!

Thanks!

Reaper16
12-18-2011, 09:48 AM
FWIW, I get beer shipped directly to my house in Alabama all the time. Yes, its against the law to do so. No, no one at FedEx ever gives a shit that I'm doing something I'm not supposed to.

Okie_Apparition
12-18-2011, 09:56 AM
alkey

Slainte
12-18-2011, 10:00 AM
FWIW, I get beer shipped directly to my house in Alabama all the time.

I have liquor (mostly SMS) mailed to me constantly via the Armed Services Postal Service (APO) which is technically illegal but, like your circumstance, the who-gives-a-shit-about-it factor is in full effect. No problems.

alnorth
12-18-2011, 01:45 PM
Thankfully, the only regulation in Iowa is that it must be signed for by an adult who does not appear to be drunk. If I miss the Fedex or UPS guy, I can just go pick it up.

Fried Meat Ball!
12-19-2011, 08:43 AM
FWIW, I get beer shipped directly to my house in Alabama all the time. Yes, its against the law to do so. No, no one at FedEx ever gives a shit that I'm doing something I'm not supposed to.

Where do you get it shipped from?

htismaqe
12-19-2011, 08:46 AM
These laws are so hilarious...

My aunt and uncle live in Texas, in the Red River valley. They're 5 minutes from Oklahoma and live in a dry county.

On the north bank of the river, on the highway, is a massive liquor store. On the south bank of the river (the Texas side), there's a huge adult book store (it's illegal in Oklahoma).

ROFL

Fried Meat Ball!
04-18-2012, 11:03 AM
So just a follow up on this... for the past week or so, I was determined to get this worked out between the wine company and the ABC store.

The ABC store was adamant that they have to have this stupid form filled out for every shipment; the wine company was adamant that they really didn't want to do it.

Well, I was curious... if a box shows up at the ABC store without the form, this can't have been the first time. So I called and asked what they do if a box of wine shows up without the form, and they gave me the runaround about having to have the form to file paperwork, and if they don't get the form they have to call Central Office and yada yada yada.

So I called the ABC Enforcement division. I told the lady the story and what the local store had told me. She said, and this is a direct quote, "Honey, I don't care about the stupid form. I care about the tax."

Now she's stepped in and called the ABC store and flat told them the form doesn't matter, to use their brains. If a box of wine shows up, it's already been paid for. It's shipped to me in their care, get in touch with me and give me the wine. I'll give them their $1.50 and be on my way.

Long story short, 12 bottles of various wines will be headed my way every three months beginning in early May.

PBJ

Frazod
04-18-2012, 11:10 AM
This is basically the same thing I have to do if I order a gun online.

Only this is.... wine.

:shake:

Fried Meat Ball!
04-21-2012, 06:53 AM
I could have reached through the phone yesterday and punched someone. I've spent hours trying to work with this wine company, the ABC store and the ABC division of the AL government, and some asshole in shipping decides after everyone else OKs it that they won't ship to me. The only way I can get wine from them is to have it shipped out of state (despite them admitting they ship to people's homes, which is illegal; the issue is I want to have it shipped to an ABC store and do things right). Ugh.

Fine. If that's the way they want to play it, none of my money. I'll take the money I'd planned to use for the wine of the month club and spend it at a local wine shop. Probably will get better wines that way anyway, since I'll get to know the wine dude and he'll get to know my tastes.

Just PISSES ME OFF. :banghead: :cuss:

Pasta Giant Meatball
04-21-2012, 07:13 AM
Amurica folks

Fish
04-21-2012, 07:55 AM
First world problems...

The Dawg
04-21-2012, 10:31 AM
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BrimMyOoEDA

Fried Meat Ball!
04-21-2012, 10:35 AM
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BrimMyOoEDA

You suck at posting.

Bump
04-21-2012, 10:39 AM
lol, does Alabama not have a very good variety of wine at liquor stores?

Frazod
04-21-2012, 10:44 AM
I could have reached through the phone yesterday and punched someone. I've spent hours trying to work with this wine company, the ABC store and the ABC division of the AL government, and some asshole in shipping decides after everyone else OKs it that they won't ship to me. The only way I can get wine from them is to have it shipped out of state (despite them admitting they ship to people's homes, which is illegal; the issue is I want to have it shipped to an ABC store and do things right). Ugh.

Fine. If that's the way they want to play it, none of my money. I'll take the money I'd planned to use for the wine of the month club and spend it at a local wine shop. Probably will get better wines that way anyway, since I'll get to know the wine dude and he'll get to know my tastes.

Just PISSES ME OFF. :banghead: :cuss:

You should just stick to moonshine.

Nightfyre
04-21-2012, 10:49 AM
I think I'll shop at my Class six while I'm here.

Fried Meat Ball!
04-21-2012, 10:55 AM
lol, does Alabama not have a very good variety of wine at liquor stores?

Depends on where you go. The place I'm going now - Filet and Vine - is one of the better wine shops in the state. I was a member back in South Carolina and enjoyed the club, so I was adamant about going back to them.

Now that I'm over that since apparently something is trying to prevent me from re-joining the club, I'm diggin' the idea of being able to get to know the wine guy and getting suggestions that are better tailored to my and my wife's tastes.