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View Full Version : Prayer Request I'm currently in the theater about to see the new Twilight with the wife


Chiefs Pantalones
11-15-2012, 05:05 PM
Special event before it comes out tonight. Man-card gone.

3rd&48ers
11-15-2012, 05:05 PM
Turn in your man card

Mr. Flopnuts
11-15-2012, 05:06 PM
Yeah. It is gone. Forever. You could've kept it until you came on a fucking football message board to brag about it fag.

Mr. Flopnuts
11-15-2012, 05:06 PM
Is your wife's penis bigger than yours?

BigMeatballDave
11-15-2012, 05:06 PM
Is she carrying your testicles in her purse?

Pestilence
11-15-2012, 05:07 PM
My wife is going with her friends. I volunteered to watch our three kids.


You're a bitch.

lewdog
11-15-2012, 05:07 PM
If you are getting laid/bj for this then your man card can be restored!

Mr. Flopnuts
11-15-2012, 05:08 PM
If you are getting laid/bj for this then your man card can be restored!

He's married. It's not like he's getting any for this. Not unless he also tucked his t-shirt into his jeans.

Flachief58
11-15-2012, 05:09 PM
So, does she ever let you wear your dick out in public or does she keep it locked in the safe & only let's you wear it on special occasions? :evil:

bevischief
11-15-2012, 05:10 PM
JFC. Grow a pair.

Buehler445
11-15-2012, 05:11 PM
If you are getting laid/bj for this then your man card can be restored!

It would have to be pretty massive. Like letting you do some crazy position she wouldn't let you do before.

Or her sister or something.

TheGuardian
11-15-2012, 05:11 PM
Man card obliterated.

keg in kc
11-15-2012, 05:11 PM
Steak-and-blow-job week sounds like a fair trade for this. No, wait, make that steak-and-blow-job month.

lewdog
11-15-2012, 05:12 PM
He's married. It's not like he's getting any for this. Not unless he also tucked his t-shirt into his jeans.

ROFL

Probably a definite t-shirt tucker-inner!

DeezNutz
11-15-2012, 05:12 PM
So, does she ever let you wear your dick out in public or does she keep it locked in the safe & only let's you wear it on special occasions? :evil:

This is complete bullshit. She always lets him bring his dick, but he's required to store it in his ass.

KCUnited
11-15-2012, 05:14 PM
Does she also thumb your anus when you eat her out?

WV
11-15-2012, 05:16 PM
On opening night? Ron White wants to talk to you.

http://cdnet.myxer.com/tn/c/654072/big/?t=20081219200947

Chiefs Pantalones
11-15-2012, 05:16 PM
I hate you guys.

notorious
11-15-2012, 05:16 PM
Why in the hell would someone post this?

WV
11-15-2012, 05:17 PM
I hate you guys.

But your wife hates you, so there. :p

The Poz
11-15-2012, 05:20 PM
2 hours is nothing. I worked on this for 6 months.

Chiefs Pantalones
11-15-2012, 05:21 PM
I went to the restroom and it was the emptiest I've ever seen it. I wonder why. The estrogen is so thick you can taste it.

I better get it 4 times a day for the next 5 years.

bevischief
11-15-2012, 05:21 PM
I hate you guys.

Just wait till the night crew is done with you...

Dr. Facebook Fever
11-15-2012, 05:22 PM
You realize that when you give her the high hard one tonight she's going to be thinking about the guys in the movie, right? Hell probably for the next month.

aturnis
11-15-2012, 05:23 PM
Special event before it comes out tonight. Man-card gone.

May God have mercy on your soul...

lewdog
11-15-2012, 05:23 PM
I better get it 4 times a day for the next 5 years.

You are married, it doesn't work that way anymore.

And please untuck that t-shirt!

saphojunkie
11-15-2012, 05:24 PM
Sneak out and go see Argo.

Buehler445
11-15-2012, 05:25 PM
I think Laz posted some nudes of Kristen Stewart. You should definitely look at those during the movie to keep penis shrivel to a minimum.

LoneWolf
11-15-2012, 05:25 PM
Are you a member of Team Jacob or Team Edward? Are you planning on pulling the popcorn trick to get even?

bevischief
11-15-2012, 05:26 PM
You realize that when you give her the high hard one tonight she's going to be thinking about the guys in the movie, right? Hell probably for the next month.

Ask her how the Vampires get a hard with no blood and a beating heart?

saphojunkie
11-15-2012, 05:26 PM
I hear when the vampires go into sunlight they sparkle! Isn't that fabulous?!



http://www.majhost.com/gallery/SL17/Random/killyourself.gif

bevischief
11-15-2012, 05:27 PM
Just tell us it sucks no matter what...

Buehler445
11-15-2012, 05:28 PM
I hear when the vampires go into sunlight they sparkle! Isn't that fabulous?!



http://www.majhost.com/gallery/SL17/Random/killyourself.gif

ROFL

Al Bundy
11-15-2012, 05:31 PM
If you are getting laid/bj for this then your man card can be restored!

Only if it is coming from his wife's hottest female friend.

notorious
11-15-2012, 05:33 PM
Only if it is coming from his wife's hottest female friend.

Yep.

siberian khatru
11-15-2012, 05:37 PM
Why in the hell would someone post this?

That was my first thought.

Some things are best left a secret: Killing that hitchhiker outside San Antone, eating boogers and going to see Twilight with the wife.

redhed
11-15-2012, 05:42 PM
Son, I am dissapoint.

Deberg_1990
11-15-2012, 05:46 PM
Theres no pussy on this earth with enough power to get me to pay money to watch sparkly vampires.
Posted via Mobile Device

Bump
11-15-2012, 05:46 PM
if she doesn't give you sex or a BJ after you should divorce her

3rd&48ers
11-15-2012, 05:48 PM
Only if it is coming from his wife's hottest female friend.

And while he is doing her you will be doing her man.. ButtPirateROFL

3rd&48ers
11-15-2012, 05:49 PM
Theres no pussy on this earth with enough power to get me to pay money to watch sparkly vampires.
Posted via Mobile Device

I wouldn't go that far

Bugeater
11-15-2012, 05:50 PM
There isn't enough facepalm for this.

redhed
11-15-2012, 05:53 PM
if she doesn't give you sex or a BJ after you should divorce her

This is before, during, and after territory.

bevischief
11-15-2012, 05:53 PM
Just ban him because of the shame.

Fish
11-15-2012, 05:54 PM
The Chiefs fail less than you do. Think about what you've done....

If you don't feel up your wife's friend and post pics of it, you're not getting back in the club.

Al Bundy
11-15-2012, 05:54 PM
And while he is doing her you will be doing her man.. ButtPirateROFL

You certainly have a thing for man on man stuff.... You can come out of the closet, fuckface.

ChiefsHawk
11-15-2012, 05:58 PM
i got head in the movie theatre watching little stewart in the 8th grade...how ironic

redhed
11-15-2012, 06:00 PM
Richard Simmons' machismo > CPantalones

loochy
11-15-2012, 06:00 PM
Super gay

Count Zarth
11-15-2012, 06:03 PM
Your wife wants to have sex with Edward.

DeezNutz
11-15-2012, 06:18 PM
Chiefs fans are making fun of you for this. Just let that sink in for a second.

KCUnited
11-15-2012, 06:21 PM
Cassel's testosterone level > Yours

La literatura
11-15-2012, 06:22 PM
i got head in the movie theatre watching little stewart in the 8th grade...how ironic

Stuart Little?

rad
11-15-2012, 06:25 PM
I hear when the vampires go into sunlight they sparkle! Isn't that fabulous?!



http://www.majhost.com/gallery/SL17/Random/killyourself.gif

Why can't they at least make it look like the slide cycles? How does a bullet fire from a semi-automatic pistol without the........oh nm.

Simply Red
11-15-2012, 06:26 PM
Special event before it comes out tonight. Man-card gone.

NOW THIS is a cool thread!!!!!!!

ChiefsHawk
11-15-2012, 06:26 PM
Stuart Little?

that might be it. didnt pay attention til a horse came on the screen

rad
11-15-2012, 06:28 PM
Cassels QB skills > pantalones

Tebows throwing motion > pantalones

One Direction > pantalones

Toothy BJ's > pantalones


Keep 'em goin' guys.......

DeezNutz
11-15-2012, 06:28 PM
that might be it. didnt pay attention til a horse came on the screen

Gross.

Munson
11-15-2012, 06:29 PM
I hope your wife lets you PIIHB for having to watch such a shitty movie.

ChiefsHawk
11-15-2012, 06:34 PM
Gross.

thats a eric berry comment

Dr. Facebook Fever
11-15-2012, 06:34 PM
I don't regret anything I've ever posted anymore.

Thanks Vanilla!

Simply Red
11-15-2012, 06:37 PM
thats a eric berry comment

fuck you is a eric berry comment

lewdog
11-15-2012, 06:38 PM
The fact that he isn't posting during the movie means this queer is fucking watching that shit!

Dave Lane
11-15-2012, 06:44 PM
She better swallow tonite, and tongue clean anything she missed

Dr. Facebook Fever
11-15-2012, 06:45 PM
The fact that he isn't posting during the movie means this queer is ****ing watching that shit!

Maybe Kristen Stewart is naked a lot.......?

Just trying to give a bro the benefit....

Bwana
11-15-2012, 06:45 PM
Dear God! :shake:

redhed
11-15-2012, 06:57 PM
The way Wilford Brimley pronounces 'diabetes' > CPantalones

Flachief58
11-15-2012, 07:02 PM
Shaving your balls with a chainsaw > Pantalones

Flachief58
11-15-2012, 07:04 PM
Pioli's draft picks > Pantalones

listopencil
11-15-2012, 07:07 PM
You no longer get to make fun of anyone, for anything, ever.

notorious
11-15-2012, 07:07 PM
Pioli's draft picks > Pantalones

Push.

chefsos
11-15-2012, 07:27 PM
It's OK. Just don't lose your grip on that laptop or tablet or smartphone or whatever you're using there, because tears can be slippery.

whoman69
11-15-2012, 07:29 PM
The only way I would watch a Twilight movie is if the producers switched it to porn, then I probably still wouldn't watch.

KCUnited
11-15-2012, 07:30 PM
Hope Solo's butthole thinks watching a Twilight movie is too painful to endure.

kcpasco
11-15-2012, 07:36 PM
My wife tried to get me to go this weekend and I said hell no.

I'm gonna go watch Lincoln or Argo by myself instead.

Bowser
11-15-2012, 07:47 PM
http://i.imgur.com/N3UFe.jpg

Bowser
11-15-2012, 07:48 PM
Hope Solo's butthole thinks watching a Twilight movie is too painful to endure.

LMAO

Dr. Facebook Fever
11-15-2012, 08:03 PM
Hope Solo's butthole

I was distracted and didn't read the rest.

Buehler445
11-15-2012, 09:27 PM
Did you make it out alive? I'm going to assume you're having a threesome with her hot friend.

Chiefs Pantalones
11-15-2012, 10:07 PM
I made it. I'm pretty sure I'm gay now after seeing that crap. Lol

Dr. Facebook Fever
11-15-2012, 10:12 PM
I made it. I'm pretty sure I'm gay now after seeing that crap. Lol

Please don't put your old avy back up.

JD10367
11-16-2012, 06:19 AM
The first few reviews of the film were positive. People were worried it might actually be good. But then the rest of the reviews came in, and it's now down to 55% on Rotten Tomatoes. Order in the Universe is restored.

okoye35chiefs
11-16-2012, 07:25 AM
My wife is going with her friends. I volunteered to watch our three kids.


You're a bitch.

Me too. Told her go with your other over 30 year old women who dream of an 18 year old kid but when men dream about Miley we are pigs? How the hell does that work.

Home with the 3 kiddos and I will gladly watch the Lion King for the 456th time with them!!!

Pablo
11-16-2012, 07:40 AM
I made it. I'm pretty sure I'm gay now after seeing that crap. Lol

Yeah we're pretty sure you're gay too.

Deberg_1990
11-16-2012, 07:48 AM
The first few reviews of the film were positive. People were worried it might actually be good. But then the rest of the reviews came in, and it's now down to 55% on Rotten Tomatoes. Order in the Universe is restored.

These last two were actually directed by a talented and respected guy. Bill Condon. He was obviously brought in to class up the material a little bit.

durtyrute
11-16-2012, 07:49 AM
There is another twilight? Are they trying to set a record for gheyness?

Radar Chief
11-16-2012, 07:55 AM
I made it. I'm pretty sure I'm gay now after seeing that crap. Lol

Red Box will have The Expendables 2 for rent Nov. 20th. It may be your only hope.