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View Full Version : Chiefs Open Letter To Branden Albert


Direckshun
03-11-2013, 04:08 PM
Dear Branden,

I've been told recently by somebody you communicate with that you do peruse ChiefsPlanet periodically. That you do pay attention to what's said here, and you are interested in what fans have to say about the team and yourself, personally. Your remarks in a recent interview lead us to believe that you're also good friends with Donald Stephenson, that you love KC, and that you believe you are a left tackle's left tackle.

Let me just put this out there: we here at ChiefsPlanet, we're the good guys.

We've been in your corner since 2008, not all of us loving your initial selection but all of us fully appreciating how well you've held down that left edge for the parade of garbage QBs you've had to protect, from Brody Croyle to Damon Huard to Tyler Thigpen to Tyler Palko to Brady Quinn and yes, Matt Cassel (who I know you have to be a professional and stand behind, but we totally know better, brother). All the while, every other Chiefs site but this one was littered with fans who've wanted to draft a new LT and move you somewhere else.

In 2010, it was draft Russell Okung, move Albert inside! In 2011, the other Chiefs sites were rooting for Bryan Bulaga -- move Albert to right tackle! In 2012 there was some movement for Riley Reiff? What!? I guess you were supposed to become a blocking tight end at that point, I have no idea.

The point is, not us. Never. ChiefsPlanet overwhelmingly stood behind you at LT for going on five years now. C'mon, you check this place. You know the love here is strong.

I bring this up, because we here at ChiefsPlanet need you to pull a solid for us: we need you to sign long-term. Like, really soon. Like within the next few weeks soon. This may be asking too much, but we have no other options at this point: when you close this internet browser, you need to pick up the phone and tell your dude to get this deal done. Meet halfway, give them something if they give you something, agree to some escalators or whatever, he's the smart guy and I'm just an idiot. But the sentiment stands, let's lock this up.

We want this locked up for several reasons. The first of which: we like you. We like you a lot. You're nimble enough in space to negate most passrushers but you shred folks like a fucking grizzly in the run game. Not a lot of left tackles can do both, and basically none of them do it as well as you do. (And certainly neither of the dudes atop this particular draft class don't.) So if nothing else, understand that there's been no more ardent supporters of Branden Albert, and that the rest of this fanbase has caught up with us.

The second reason: we have the 1st overall pick this year! And we are totally elated to have it, because it never happens to Kansas City. This is legitimately a opportunity for you to play on a perennial playoff team (as well as us to root for one). And the way things have fallen, you oddly have a key responsibility in that: if you sign a long-term deal to remain the Chiefs' left tackle, the Chiefs won't have to burn a 1st overall selection on either Texas A&M's Luke Joeckel or Central Michigan's Eric Fisher trying to keep the offense in the same spot, and can instead focus on bringing in a dynamic player that will make the team better.

The suspicion of many on this board is that West Virginia QB Geno Smith is on Andy Reid's radar -- think of how refreshing it would be to block for two #1 overall picks over the course of your next contract (Geno and Alex Smith). You signing makes all of this possible. If you do not sign, it becomes less possible, maybe even impossible. You are our hail mary to stave off Luke Joeckel. God, Branden, can you believe they want to draft a right tackle with the #1 overall? That's what they want to do. WHAT!?

Not if you're the man, though. And we'll all mark the day you signed as the day those fears were put to rest, and this team's climb to championship-level success began.

If you do not sign, Reid will go with Joeckel or Fisher. Donald Stephenson will not even get a fair shot at right tackle, when we both know he deserves to man the spot. And you'll play all year under the fucking franchise tag, which we all totally hate around here, only to face this same stupid drama all over again next year.

If you do sign, you will be basking in KC barbeque for the rest of your career with a team loaded with talent under nobody other than Andy Reid. Stephenson almost certainly gets a chance to man the right spot, and the Chiefs are freed up to take the best QB this draft has to offer, which hopefully they'll choose to do.

It's on you, man. We want you here. You hopefully want to stay here. It's a match. And we can do this whole year-long dance under the franchise tag where we find a way to talk ourselves out of it, or we can get to the dotted line and keep what's working. And what's more, the sensible move here is the one that immediately escalates this team's chances at competing on a championship level.

You're pretty close to our last hope for that this offseason. Get on the phone, man.

Just get on the phone.

DeezNutz
03-11-2013, 04:10 PM
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mds9eaB2y51qi9d7mo1_500.gif

MagicHef
03-11-2013, 04:12 PM
How often do you go through keyboards?

Der Flöprer
03-11-2013, 04:12 PM
Mr. Flopnuts endorses this message.

Brock
03-11-2013, 04:13 PM
Could not have said it better.

KCrockaholic
03-11-2013, 04:14 PM
Well. Alrighty then.

KCrockaholic
03-11-2013, 04:15 PM
If only he had a twitter we could send this to him.

-King-
03-11-2013, 04:18 PM
Dafuq? LMAO

Sorter
03-11-2013, 04:19 PM
http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/slow-clap-gif.gif

TambaBerry
03-11-2013, 04:20 PM
I agree 100% I love me some Albert, I never understood why people are labeling him as a guard. The guy is a beast at tackle and we smart fans love him. Give him the money Chiefs so we don't have to waste a pick on a position that we have filled.

DA_T_84
03-11-2013, 04:20 PM
If only he had a twitter we could send this to him.
I bet he still checks twitter.

People should post this link with the hashtag #brandonalbert and #chiefs

Hoover
03-11-2013, 04:23 PM
http://d22zlbw5ff7yk5.cloudfront.net/images/cm-36243-050bffabb05dbf.gif

Sorter
03-11-2013, 04:23 PM
http://i.imgur.com/52kVK.gif

hometeam
03-11-2013, 04:23 PM
I bet he still checks twitter.

People should post this link with the hashtag #brandonalbert and #chiefs

Done~

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>An open letter to <a href="https://twitter.com/search/%23BrandonAlbert">#BrandonAlbert</a> from the heart of <a href="https://twitter.com/search/%23chiefsnation">#chiefsnation</a> <a href="http://t.co/pWEiJruH4t" title="http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=271000">chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.…</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/search/%23chiefs">#chiefs</a></p>&mdash; Cody Hodge (@hometeamKC) <a href="https://twitter.com/hometeamKC/status/311226387669344256">March 11, 2013</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

DTLB58
03-11-2013, 04:26 PM
If only he had a twitter we could send this to him.

LMAO

Nice letter btw, :thumb:

ChiliConCarnage
03-11-2013, 04:27 PM
I wonder how long until someone makes a fake Branden Albert account and starts responding.

Direckshun
03-11-2013, 04:32 PM
Done~

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>An open letter to <a href="https://twitter.com/search/%23BrandonAlbert">#BrandonAlbert</a> from the heart of <a href="https://twitter.com/search/%23chiefsnation">#chiefsnation</a> <a href="http://t.co/pWEiJruH4t" title="http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=271000">chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.…</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/search/%23chiefs">#chiefs</a></p>&mdash; Cody Hodge (@hometeamKC) <a href="https://twitter.com/hometeamKC/status/311226387669344256">March 11, 2013</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

It's Branden Albert, btw.

hometeam
03-11-2013, 04:36 PM
It's Branden Albert, btw.

WOOPS :P I fix

Hoover
03-11-2013, 04:36 PM
It's Branden Albert, btw.
http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/Mitt-Romney-Laughing.gif

ThatRaceCardGuy
03-11-2013, 04:42 PM
YES!

nychief
03-11-2013, 04:43 PM
Well this is a colossal waste of time.

ClevelandBronco
03-11-2013, 04:43 PM
You trolling or is this a serious and pathetic attempt to communicate with a guy who shouldn't give a flying fuck what your input is?

-King-
03-11-2013, 04:44 PM
LMAO

Scrawny Armed Alex Smith
03-11-2013, 04:44 PM
You trolling or is this a serious and pathetic attempt to communicate with a guy who shouldn't give a flying **** what your input is?

Trust me, he reads stuff here. He cares.

Big news coming in the next couple days. I can't go in depth with things...
Very nice letter.

ClevelandBronco
03-11-2013, 04:45 PM
Trust me, he reads stuff here. He cares.

I'm not saying that it's impossible that he's that stupid.

-King-
03-11-2013, 04:45 PM
Trust me, he reads stuff here. He cares.

.

I honestly hope he doesn't. LMAO @ Letting some fans on a message board dictate how you negotiate your 50+ million dollar contract.

ClevelandBronco
03-11-2013, 04:46 PM
I honestly hope he doesn't. LMAO @ Letting some fans on a message board dictate how you negotiate your 50+ million dollar contract.

Yeah, that's the thing.

Scrawny Armed Alex Smith
03-11-2013, 04:47 PM
I'm not saying that it's impossible that he's that stupid.

Can you please do us a favor and shutup? Please don't ruin this thread.
I'm asking nicely. Just stop.

Chief_For_Life58
03-11-2013, 04:49 PM
hey branden. if youre reading this. Sup dawg?

ClevelandBronco
03-11-2013, 04:49 PM
Can you please do us a favor and shutup? Please don't ruin this thread.
I'm asking nicely. Just stop.

Gee, that doesn't really sound nice.

Fuck you.

Chief_For_Life58
03-11-2013, 04:51 PM
oh branden another thing. you think you could stop big dan saleaumua from getting by you?

Garcia Bronco
03-11-2013, 04:52 PM
Also add to the letter that real men are Hokies.

nychief
03-11-2013, 04:56 PM
PS. we want to fuck you hard. txt us.

-King-
03-11-2013, 04:56 PM
I wonder if Branden likes Chinese food.




Hey Branden, do you like chinese food?

ct
03-11-2013, 05:06 PM
Props to the OP! Well done, and I concur 100%!

Brock
03-11-2013, 05:09 PM
Well this is a colossal waste of time.

Thats different from the rest of the board somehow.

Iowanian
03-11-2013, 05:16 PM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f273/Cristian619/Misc%209/Tyrion-Lannister-peter-dinklage-28016431-292-256.gif

KCDC
03-11-2013, 05:32 PM
Agreed.

They can also remove the franchise tag and screw you, so you need to sign long term BEFORE the draft!

J Diddy
03-11-2013, 05:35 PM
When did Gochiefs hack Direckshun's account?

PRIEST
03-11-2013, 05:38 PM
Mr. Flopnuts endorses this message.







This

saphojunkie
03-11-2013, 05:42 PM
You trolling or is this a serious and pathetic attempt to communicate with a guy who shouldn't give a flying **** what your input is?

Why not? You're doing both.

wazu
03-11-2013, 05:44 PM
Branden,

Everything Direkshun said is both true and wise. Sign the deal. For me.

Pasta Giant Meatball
03-11-2013, 08:23 PM
Any response?

nychief
03-11-2013, 08:33 PM
Did he send us a dick pic yet?

Easy 6
03-11-2013, 08:47 PM
Wow, nice thread, wish i'd thought of doing it... suffice it to say that the people who know what in the hell they're talking about have respected Branden Albert for years.

We're lucky to have a guy of his caliber manning the left side, as i've said many times before... he just seems to get a little better every single year, not only that, but all of these years he's been almost a ghost as far as media presence, which in this day and age is usally easy to consider a blessing... "shut up and play ball"

But, i've been surprised and thrilled to see him take a more vocal role lately, speaking his mind like he has... a guy like Albert, he DESERVES to do that, he has EARNED it... and i'm super glad he's here, ready to LEAD, ready to go once again.

LOVE YA BABY

RyFo18
03-11-2013, 09:28 PM
http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/18eh0jgv8g2btgif/original.gif

-King-
03-11-2013, 09:31 PM
He saw this thread and is doing 100MPH on the highway right now trying to get to the Chiefs facility to sign his deal.

Dave Lane
03-11-2013, 09:36 PM
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lr6wazkQoW1r2hybuo1_500.gif

RyFo18
03-11-2013, 09:37 PM
Actually, this gif is much better than my first one:

http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/TARANTINO-FISTPUMP.GIF

Nightfyre
03-11-2013, 09:39 PM
Actually, this gif is much better than my first one:

http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/TARANTINO-FISTPUMP.GIF

This .gif would be hilarious if you cut like 1/8 of an inch off the left side.

Sweet Daddy Hate
03-11-2013, 11:11 PM
ALL In. Geno and Brandon; multiple 'ships!
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Pitt Gorilla
03-11-2013, 11:26 PM
I thought that most everyone really liked the Albert pick. I mean, he was a mid-first rounder and had incredible athletic ability. I honestly don't remember anyone hating on either of our first two picks.

tecumseh
03-11-2013, 11:39 PM
Groovy ,Baby! BranDEN! make it hapPEN!

Count Alex's Losses
03-11-2013, 11:41 PM
we both know he deserves to man the spot.

He does?

What has Donald Stephenson ever done to deserve shit, besides sucking ass in the NFL?

JFC

Count Alex's Losses
03-11-2013, 11:41 PM
Post this on ArrowheadPride, mang.

Max exposure.

DaneMcCloud
03-11-2013, 11:58 PM
I wonder if Branden likes Chinese food.




Hey Branden, do you like chinese food?

Fucking childish moron.

DaneMcCloud
03-11-2013, 11:59 PM
I honestly hope he doesn't. LMAO @ Letting some fans on a message board dictate how you negotiate your 50+ million dollar contract.

Because you're such a fucking genius that you can't let someone on a football forum express themselves without making a stupid fucking comment.

Nice job, Queen.

Simply Red
03-12-2013, 12:03 AM
Did he send us a dick pic yet?

would you lick a chick's ass?

mikey23545
03-12-2013, 12:59 AM
Branden - watch out! This has nothing to do with how these bozos feel about your ability to play left tackle.

It is merely about using you to gratify their insatiable, cult-like lust for Geno Smith.

BossChief
03-12-2013, 01:20 AM
I agree with EVERY WORD.

I hope Branden Albert retires a Chief with rings.

ClevelandBronco
03-12-2013, 03:06 AM
I agree with EVERY WORD.

I hope Branden Albert retires a Chief with rings.

There's an idea. He should go get rings and come back to retire with the Chiefs.

-King-
03-12-2013, 03:33 AM
Because you're such a fucking genius that you can't let someone on a football forum express themselves without making a stupid fucking comment.

Nice job, Queen.

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4vil5J6uA1qj3ir1.gif

Direckshun
03-12-2013, 07:41 AM
He does?

What has Donald Stephenson ever done to deserve shit, besides sucking ass in the NFL?

Know the soft spots, bro.

Albert and Stephenson are close.

Direckshun
03-12-2013, 07:42 AM
Post this on ArrowheadPride, mang.

Max exposure.

Why not.

Done.

http://www.arrowheadpride.com/2013/3/12/4093298/open-letter-to-branden-albert

Rausch
03-12-2013, 07:43 AM
Branden - watch out! This has nothing to do with how these bozos feel about your ability to play left tackle.

It is merely about using you to gratify their insatiable, cult-like lust for Geno Smith.

True story...

King_Chief_Fan
03-12-2013, 07:47 AM
Dear Branden,

I've been told recently by somebody you communicate with that you do peruse ChiefsPlanet periodically. That you do pay attention to what's said here, and you are interested in what fans have to say about the team and yourself, personally. Your remarks in a recent interview lead us to believe that you're also good friends with Donald Stephenson, that you love KC, and that you believe you are a left tackle's left tackle.

Let me just put this out there: we here at ChiefsPlanet, we're the good guys.

We've been in your corner since 2008, not all of us loving your initial selection but all of us fully appreciating how well you've held down that left edge for the parade of garbage QBs you've had to protect, from Brody Croyle to Damon Huard to Tyler Thigpen to Tyler Palko to Brady Quinn and yes, Matt Cassel (who I know you have to be a professional and stand behind, but we totally know better, brother). All the while, every other Chiefs site but this one was littered with fans who've wanted to draft a new LT and move you somewhere else.

In 2010, it was draft Russell Okung, move Albert inside! In 2011, the other Chiefs sites were rooting for Bryan Bulaga -- move Albert to right tackle! In 2012 there was some movement for Riley Reiff? What!? I guess you were supposed to become a blocking tight end at that point, I have no idea.

The point is, not us. Never. ChiefsPlanet overwhelmingly stood behind you at LT for going on five years now. C'mon, you check this place. You know the love here is strong.

.

ahhh, that's nice

GloryDayz
03-12-2013, 07:56 AM
How often do you go through keyboards?

https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTqpEU9dclEzVN-C_Wi6XDnjaaxjvABpoPj68Got-q491_6yFQfcA

Direckshun
03-12-2013, 09:31 AM
So I specifically posted it in this forum because CP has always been in favor of keeping Albert at LT. Other Chiefs websites have long disputed that.

But to make the posting at AP possible, I changed all the "Chiefsplanet" stuff to "Chiefs blogosphere" to include them.

Second response to this letter at AP was by some guy suggesting we could sign Albert and Long, and move Albert to guard.

LMAO

God.

cookster50
03-12-2013, 09:37 AM
Brandon Albert's response "tl;dr"

Sweet Daddy Hate
03-13-2013, 10:46 PM
Brandon Albert's response "tl;dr"

what does that mean?
Posted via Mobile Device

Sweet Daddy Hate
03-13-2013, 11:33 PM
lol
Posted via Mobile Device

Sweet Daddy Hate
03-13-2013, 11:35 PM
Its okay, he's got Chaisey-poo and Smythy-fuck to protect now! Im sure he's thrilled!
Posted via Mobile Device

something cooler
03-14-2013, 12:24 AM
Its okay, he's got Chaisey-poo and Smythy-fuck to protect now! Im sure he's thrilled!
Posted via Mobile Device

Don't post that shit in here. Go to bed. We're working on things.

something cooler
03-14-2013, 12:24 AM
Should throw in money to put this in the star.

Sweet Daddy Hate
03-14-2013, 12:44 AM
Don't post that shit in here. Go to bed. We're working on things.

I'm sure your BRILLIANT manuscript for "Eleventy Billion Ways to Fap to Chiefs Mediocrity" shant suffer due to my presence.
Posted via Mobile Device

something cooler
03-14-2013, 12:57 AM
I'm sure your BRILLIANT manuscript for "Eleventy Billion Ways to Fap to Chiefs Mediocrity" shant suffer due to my presence.
Posted via Mobile Device

I can't tell you how much I would love mediocrity compared to these shitty years. I'm not even joking. At the beginning of the offseason you have a 1 in 32 chance of winning the title. I don't own the team. I can't make any decisions to better it. I'm going to be a passionate chiefs fan for the rest of my life, or until the nfl falls. I would love nothing more than a superbowl win. But I would also love them to just not suck every fucking week. I would love for them to at least be in it every year. Could you imagine a 9-7 to 11-5 team every fucking year for ten years? With maybe a 2007 giants run to a title? That would be pretty badass. We have never, ever, been that fucking good.

Jiu Jitsu Jon
03-14-2013, 03:33 AM
Can you write a letter to Carson Palmer while you're at it? Ask him to agree to play for less so we can trade him to Seattle for Matt Flynn.

ArmyChief
03-14-2013, 05:27 AM
Dayum.. You had me at 'hello'.. Great letter Direckshun!! Hope this get to him and the deal gets done.

ArmyChief
03-14-2013, 05:48 AM
I would love for them to at least be in it every year. Could you imagine a 9-7 to 11-5 team every ****ing year for ten years? With maybe a 2007 giants run to a title? That would be pretty badass. We have never, ever, been that ****ing good.



Do you not remember the 1990's? 101-59 during that period.. Tied for 3rd with Dallas only behind SF and Bills..
1990-1999: 11-5, 10-6, 10-6, 11-5, 9-7, 13-3, 9-7, 13-3, 7-9, 9-7

something cooler
03-14-2013, 05:52 AM
Do you not remember the 1990's? 101-59 during that period.. Tied for 3rd with Dallas only behind SF and Bills..
1990-1999: 11-5, 10-6, 10-6, 11-5, 9-7, 13-3, 9-7, 13-3, 7-9, 9-7

The first year I really recall as a chiefs fan is 1997, I was 7.

However, that sounds way better than the past 6 years.

Chiefnj2
03-14-2013, 06:37 AM
Branden,

If you are reading this - GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE.

Alex Smith is a sack magnet. He holds on to the ball longer than Cassel. Your stats are going to suffer. The sacks that Smith takes is only going to strengthen the BS argument you should switch positions.

When you are sitting on the bench watching the opposing offense you will see QB's who have the ability to quickly throw the ball downfield. And, do it accurately. I know it's a foreign concept to what you are accustomed to in Kansas City.

Your new head coach has put his faith for the next several years in Alex Smith and Chase Daniels. Think about that for a minute. You are going from Matt Cassel, to a QB that is even more conservative. Even, more, conservative. I'm sure Alex is a nice guy like Cassel was, but really? Go find a team that strives for better than average QB play. You've earned it. In the word of the famous hockey goalie Denis Lemieux tell your agent "to trade me right ****ing now", and then hang up the phone.

Best of luck to you.

Sweet Daddy Hate
03-14-2013, 09:02 AM
Branden,

If you are reading this - GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE.

Alex Smith is a sack magnet. He holds on to the ball longer than Cassel. Your stats are going to suffer. The sacks that Smith takes is only going to strengthen the BS argument you should switch positions.

When you are sitting on the bench watching the opposing offense you will see QB's who have the ability to quickly throw the ball downfield. And, do it accurately. I know it's a foreign concept to what you are accustomed to in Kansas City.

Your new head coach has put his faith for the next several years in Alex Smith and Chase Daniels. Think about that for a minute. You are going from Matt Cassel, to a QB that is even more conservative. Even, more, conservative. I'm sure Alex is a nice guy like Cassel was, but really? Go find a team that strives for better than average QB play. You've earned it. In the word of the famous hockey goalie Denis Lemieux tell your agent "to trade me right ****ing now", and then hang up the phone.

Best of luck to you.

lmao. SO much this.
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