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Pasta Giant Meatball
05-20-2013, 03:00 PM
As a spinoff to the successful NFL Network's version of this and from the drama thread, it has come to fruition that this thread must be created.

Each day Hootie will reveal a member starting with 101 and working his way in order to number 1. I will update the OP as I see the names revealed.

*Warning this thread may cause a severe case of butthurt*

Let it begin!!

Hootie's List (http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showpost.php?p=9765424&postcount=2)

Saul Good - A little about Roaster #2 (by frazod)


Positives: Cherishes the spirit of Hootie. Cherishes all things Hootie. Was once himself Hootie, right up until the day that goddamn bitch refused to get an abortion. Longs to be Hootie again. Cries himself to sleep at night remembering what it was like to be Hootie. Covets Hootie. In fact, if he actually knew where Hootie was, Saul would probably kill Hootie, eat his heart, and then fashion a Hootie suit out of Hootie's actual skin and wear it while posting in this very thread. So that's settled - he's the best man for the job. Also, is smarter, more experienced, and a bit more creative than Hootie (brain was spared the hard years of constant alcohol abuse). And unlike Hootie, who works 50 hours a week, gets 1 day off and has a life, Saul's got nothing but time, and time, and more time, to pour himself into these rankings in honor of his fallen (or at least wandered off) champion. Well, that and argue the same points over and over with Wickedson in the realignment thread, but seriously, there's no reason he can't do both. It's not like anyone outside of cyberspace will miss him.

Negatives: Can't match Hootie's energy level, goofiness or actual happiness. Vaguely remembers what it was like to be joyfully carefree, but sadly can no longer emulate that since he turned into an angry version of Phil from City Slickers all those years ago; instead substitutes vitriol and spite for Hootie's slapstick silliness. Mean and nasty can only be fun for so long. At least for normal people.

Outlook: Saul seems to have impressed the Hootiephiles with his initial offering, but they are a fickle bunch, and much like their hero, easily distracted and ohhhhh shiny. He may have the right stuff, but let's see what he does with it.

Good luck Saul! :toast:
85 BigRedChief

BigRedChief is the single most self-indulgent poster on this board. He tries to come across as everyone's buddy, but every thread he starts is nothing more than a vehicle for humble-bragging. We get it, BRC...you make a bunch of money, but you could make a lot more if you weren't so dedicated to serving others...what a great guy you are. Basically, he's the upper-middle class version of Dane. I'd say he's like Dane minus the part about treating twelve year old's sphinctors as pinky rings, but I've seen pictures of him, and if he doesn't have to turn off his lights and close his curtains on Halloween, he should. Also, he's the kind of guy who calls his
curtains "drapes".

He decorates his house in 1980s artwork that focuses on nearly nude drawings of women with butch haircuts. They remind him of his younger days when he was a keytar player in a Styx cover band. He claims that he is some black belt in karate, but the closest he comes to working out is when he invites frazod over to jack off to Jane Fonda movies on VHS.

Pros: Once got away with ripping off Columbia House by purchasing 8 tapes for a penny and then claiming to move out of the country to avoid having to buy the rest. Can wear Zubaz pants, and it actually works for him.

Cons: Calls black people "coloreds". Chews nicotine gum while smoking. Cleans his ears with safety pins.

Outlook for 2014: Exactly the same as this year. Nothing about him has changed since 1982. Why should next year be any different?

84. StevieRay

Stevie is a devout Christian. He briefly flirted with the idea of becoming a priest because he wanted a job that encouraged being a sexual predator, but he couldn't figure out how to show off his chest hair while wearing the clerical collar. Eventually, he decided to become an Elvis impersonator so that he could have the best of both worlds.

Easily the most passive-aggressive member of our fine community, Stevie loves to take cheap shots at other posters under the guise of being concerned about their emotional and spiritual well-being. He's elevated it to an art-form. This is the closest he will ever get to being an actual artist despite the fact that he fancies himself a painter. Maybe I'm a philistine, but any asshole with a can of spray paint and a bad attitude can produce the kind of "art" Stevie shits out. I've paid $3 for landscapes on cardboard in Tijuana that were better than the portraits of black people Stevie adds to the side of charter schools. Maybe if he had thought of doing portraits of Andre the Giant and writing "obey", he could have become the modern day Andy Warhol. Instead, he's Bazooka Joe without the punchlines.

His claim to fame is that he's a Chiefs superfan. Not just anyone can do that, you know...you have to have a costume...or at least some red face paint and Chiefs bed sheets to wear as a cape or something. Okay. Anyone can do that, but it's still pretty sweet. They get their own locker room at Arrowhead and everything. I mean, it's not technically a locker room per se, but he and X-factor do change in the same port-a-potty in the parking lot before games. (I guess I was right the first time. You have to be able to fit inside a port-a-potty to be a superfan, so not just anyone can do it...sorry, Fraz.)

http://i1176.photobucket.com/albums/x336/hshaebr/590174_display_zps3f65c78e.jpg

Pros: I like the way the word "pompadour" sounds. Now that the new Liberace movie has come out, his Elvis costumes actually seem relevant. Does that sweet "stick your arm out straight and wiggle your hand" thing really well.

Cons: Looks inside his kleenex after blowing his nose. (What the **** are you hoping to find?) Mixes his "Jesus Juice" too stiff. Remember, Stevie, putting it in a Pepsi can isn't enough. If the first one has too much booze, the kids are going to get wise to your plot. Fast-forwards "Passion of the Christ" to the scenes where Jim Caviezel has his shirt off.

Outlook for 2014: Let's say higher. No way does this year's list even get finished, so who gives a **** about next year, anyway?

83. Rustshack

You probably don't recognize the name, but the next time you read a random post about how ****ing great Iowa State is...think back to this thread...this is who I'm talking about. His posts are like when Bad Company is the band playing the local free concert in the park. At first, you're like "who the **** is Bad Company?" Then, when the first song starts, you're going "I didn't know they played this song". Then, an entire hour passes where you know all the words to the songs that you didn't realize were by Bad Company. You probably thought it was Foriegner your whole life, but it wasn't. Its totally understandable that someone could think that some of their songs were by Foriegner...or maybe Cheap Trick. It does kind of sound like them, but its Bad Company. Look it up if you dont believe me. Anyway, they aren't good songs. They suck shit, actually. Still, when the concert ends, you're all "all those shitty songs...they were Bad Company all along...I never knew". All those shitty posts...you'll recognize them when you see them...that's Rustshack.

So Rustshack is just your skinny, geeky kid right out of central casting. He got the zits and the glasses, and the floodwater pants and the whole bit. He tries to go goth and be all dark and mad at the world, but he just looks like a pasty queer. He's dressed up as a vampire every Halloween since he was an eighth grader in 1999. Then, when vampire movies got popular, he got pissed off because everyone else dressed up like vampires for Halloween looked cooler than him. Seriously, Rusty...you were trying for Edward from Twilight, but people were getting Count Chocula from Kellogg's. So he would cry like a bitch, and the other kids would make fun of him. He thought about hanging himself but decided against it because vampires can't die from that. So he went to one of the other vampire/goth kids the next day for advice, they told him that he had to think of something even worse, so he went to Iowa State. (Look, not all of these jokes are going to be gems.)

So, anyway, **** you, Rustshack. Iowa State sucks. Steele Jantz sucks. Paul Rhodes sucks. Frazod is fat. Larry Eustachy is awesome for sucking down cool ones from cans with pull-tabs with hot skanks at Mizzou. You suck.

Pros: Isn't a KU fan. Isn't bothered by the fact that Top Gun was laced with latent homosexuality...he appreciates it for what it was...a pretty kickass movie that doesn't need me to defend it from YOU.

Cons: If he did hang himself, he could easily be mistaken for a flaccid penis dangling from a string if the person who was looking at him was kind of far away...or was close by but wasn't wearing their necessary prescription glasses or something. Probably knows enough about computers to track me down in real life if he took this the wrong way and decided to smear goat's blood on my door (or whatever the **** renaissance festivaly people do whenever they want to convey disapproval).

Outlook for Rustshack in 2014: Everyone will forget who he is again. Years from now, people will still talk about the time Dave got a DUI on the way home from that Foreigner concert.

Outlook for the Cylcones in 2014: Somewhere in the 5-7 to 7-5 range. Just like they are every year.

82. KCnative

This little jumping bean occasionally posts about the Chiefs, but the vast majority of his work centers around accusing everyone of racism. It never occurs to him that it's not his race that makes people hate him...it's the fact that he's a fat, angry prick. I hate to break it to you, native, but you're basically frazod with a sombrero.

He came to Chiefs Planet because he is fascinated by sports in general. You see, where his family is from, sports aren't really part of the culture. After all, every Mexican who can run, jump, or swim sneaks into the US. Hootie's threads are of particular interest to him because all of native's brothers used to bus tables at hootie's restaurant, and now all of his sisters clean the rooms at hootie's hotel. In that regard, hootie is kind of the pied piper of pendejos.

He works in the financial services industry where he became a hero to his people when he realized that Mexicans in the US could write off their trucks as both a work vehicle AND an office. (I'm kidding, of course. They don't really file tax returns.)

Pros: Sells tamales out of a truck, and everything tastes better out of a truck. Has a dog that lives on the roof of his house.

Cons: Spends twenty minutes every afternoon making his chili dog at 7/11 and doesn't leave any toppings for anyone else. Brings live chickens on the bus.

Outlook for 2014: Will be higher on the list if he spends more time posting in threads about football and less time in threads about napping on other people's front lawns.

81. Notorious

Notorious has a picture of his cat, Lobo (named after his favorite WNBA player) as his avatar. I should probably end this roast with that, but...whatever. Cats are for spinsters and pillowbitergots. Notorious is neither, so you know he hates them...so what gives? Why the **** does he have a cat? Well, I'll tell you why. Notorious has always kept a box full of piss and shit inside his house. People used to think of him as the sick **** with the boxes full of turds in his foyer. Now, he's just a guy with a cat, so his bizarre fetish seems socially acceptable. It's kind of a genius move, really. I mean, if I could get away with leaving dead hookers on my lawn by buying a ferret, I'd be at Petland right now.

Still, having cats around actually comes in handy for him, as he's a little too in touch with his feminine side, and he likes to gently stroke the cat while having himself a good cry. Pretty soon, though, he's going to have to tie the ****ing thing up in a burlap sack and throw it off a bridge, or I'm taking back what I said earlier about him not being a pillowbitergot.

All in all, he's an okay guy. I'll probably take him up on his offer to babysit my kids.

Pros: Really good at tickling. Keeps working at growing that mustache even though it isn't coming in very thick.

Cons: Huge fan of Jackson Browne. Drives a Plymouth.

Outlook for 2014: His neighbors will be asked to describe him on the local news.

80. Braincase

Braincase loves to talk about how he knows all of the movers and shakers in the KU athletics department. He's always dropping tidbits of "inside information" that inevitably turn out to be wrong. I'm pretty sure the closest he's ever gotten to the Kansas athletics program is when he outbid frazod to win Mark Mangino's custom built toilet. It was a great moment for Braincase who has turned it into a shrine, but it sucked for frazod. He hates KU but was desperately in need of a toilet that could support his big fat ass while receiving the massive meat-logs he delivers. Fortunately, they were able to work out an arrangement wherein frazod can take his hippo dumps on the toilet while Braincase gives him blumpkins and imagines that frazod is actually coach Mangino.

While he may not be an insider with KU hoops, he was an assistant to the coach of an eighth grade girls basketball team...until he cracked under the pressure and got ejected from a game. (I'm not even joking. He made a thread about it that's absolutely hysterical...look it up.)
He has started over 500 threads in total, and that is the only one that doesn't suck. You'd think he would accidentally post an interesting topic every now and again, but he hasn't. Recent threads include such riveting topics as the Trans-Siberian Orchestra, licking a man's ass, and a princess Diana joke right at the height of its relevancy in 2011. At some point, he thought to himself, "CP is going to ****ing love this princess Diana joke...I can't wait to start a thread about it". We need more posters like him.

Pros: Was told that it's not butter, accepted it, and moved on...if he was in disbelief, he didn't show it. Beats the shit out of his kids. That wouldn't normally be considered a positive, but his kids are ugly and, as such, deserve every ass-whipping they get.

Cons: Wears pleated jeans. Drinks Taster's Choice coffee because he wants to celebrate the moments of his life.

Outlook for 2014: Dies when his skull is crushed under frazod's fupa. At his funeral, people will take solace in knowing that he died doing what he loved.

79. big nasty kcnut

kcnut is genuinely one of my favorite posters on this board. Normally, you have to actually read a post or two before realize how stupid the posters on this board are. Nut saves you time because you don't have to read a single word of his incoherent ramblings in order to realize how insane he is. The first time I tried to decipher one of his bizarre missives, I felt like John Nash trying to intercept Soviet communications.

If you've never seen the big nasty, you can find his doppelganger helping out in the concession stand at any little league baseball complex in the country. Look for kid with the oversized hearing aids and the random shaved patches on the back of his head. (I'm not sure if those are related to surgery, or if he is just constantly trying to cut his own hair, but I don't know who to ask.) Fortunately, his hair is mostly covered up by the old-school motorcycle helmet that he has to wear at all times.

When he's not posting on CP, he's either handing people their Doritos Loco tacos through a window or putting together a political podcast. (The realization that this is simply a statement of fact rather than a joke is unsettling when you realize that his votes count as much as anyone's...and you know he votes.) If you ever want to send yourself into a coma but can't find a rock to bash against your head, you might want to consider giving him a listen. He is to Rush Limbaugh what frazod is to Alan Dershowitz. I guess it's a good hobby for him given the fact that his mom finally stopped secretly replacing the pet bunnies he kept hugging to "sleep", so who am I to judge?


Pros: Has amazing retard strength. Incredibly, he has never eaten from a package with a skull and crossbones on the label. When he tucks his shirt in, the bottom of his shirt sometimes pokes through his fly, and that makes me laugh.

Cons: Makes LiveSteam look like the Indian kid at the Howard Scripps spelling bee. Chewed the points off all my new Crayolas in pre-school. I thought that was a shitty thing for an eleven year old to do.

Outlook for 2014: I expect big things from the big nasty. Hopefully he doesn't get cratered in a drone strike.

78. crazycoffey

Hopefully everyone is breathing a sigh of relief seeing that I'm doing coffey's roast rather than hootie. If my roast of big nasty kcnut caused an uproar, a hootie roast of cc would probably spark an international incident. But enough about me and my giant cock...

Crazycoffey has a tendency to blur the lines between CP and real life as evidenced by the fact that he posted Clay's grandfather's contact information in a thread on this very board. You'd think he might know better than to do something like that, but he's a drunk...and an angry one at that. For more evidence of this, look no further than his infamous run-in with our own hootie.

As usual, hootie was minding his own business...objectively watching Peyton Manning highlights after a long day of ladling out soup to the less fortunate...when CC stumbled onto the board three Zimas deep and started talking shit about minorities. Now normally hootie isn't one for confrontation, but he will not tolerate mean-spirited comments about others. Coffey's response was to abuse the infraction system in order to get hootie banned. Naturally, hootie was beyond pissed, created a new account, and resumed setting cc straight in a stern but fair tone (or something like that...I don't remember the exact details...**** you). Coffey then did what any mentally unstable drunk would do in the middle of a heated argument...he sent hootie a PM about the most intimate, painful details of his own life...naturally.

Let me repeat this for Rico and anyone else who missed it... Crazycoffey, while in the midst of a nasty flame war with hootie, sent hootie a private message full of personal details about the ongoing problems in his marriage. Fortunately for coffey, hootie is a classy guy with a keen understanding of boundaries, so he kept those details private... I'm just ****ing with you. Hootie immediately shoved that shit right back in coffey's face. Would any sane person expect anything less from hootie? Of course not...but coffey is not sane. He is, however, a cop.

Let that ****ing sink in... Here is a guy who can't even be trusted with the infraction system, yet our tax dollars pay for him to carry a gun on behalf of the criminal justice system. Are you ****ing kidding me? I wouldn't trust this drunk to drive a goddamned honey wagon let alone a paddy wagon, but what the **** do I know?

Fortunately, hootie made a much-heralded return, and cc has been working to get his marriage back on track. He and his wife have even started dabbling in the swinging lifestyle in order to spice things up. Being a short, fat, bald guy, he doesn't exactly get invited to the "A-squad" parties like in Eyes Wide Shut, though. It's mostly a bunch of skinny white dudes going balls deep into fat Asian hookers while frazod sits in the corner trying desperately to find his penis, but coffey works with what he's got, and I can't fault him for that. The problem is that he tends to just show up, rip off all of his clothes, and yell, "orgy time". WTF, dude? That's terrible form. I mean yes, there's going to be an orgy, but even orgies at the Ramada expect a certain level of decorum...at least take off your socks and shoes. This isn't like back when you were a scout leader and took the kids on campouts. The webelos may not have known better, but that's no excuse for you.

Pros: Gets paid to harass minorities. Is handy with a sewing machine.

Cons: Doesn't wipe after he shits if it felt like it came out clean. (I understand his reasoning, but you still have to check.) Always does the "cha cha cha" thing when singing Happy Birthday.

Outlook for 2014: He and his wife answer an ad on adult friend finder only to find out when they meet up that it's Clay...evening goes better than expected.


77. Phobia

Phil is a legend in his own mind. He has this peculiar habit of bragging over things that nobody else on the face of the earth even cares about. I swear to Christ, P, nobody gives a shit that you once called Trent Green "TrINT Green" 12 years ago. It was funny enough to generate a 44 post thread. Congratulations. Why is that throw-away of a thread in the ****ing Hall of Classics? Is that really a classic thread? In Phil mother****ing Kloster's head? Yes. To anybody else in the world? Hardly.

Phobia is the kind of guy who will only befriend people who are a rung below him in status. If you make more money than him...are smarter than him...have a better goatee than him...drive a faster Camaro than him, etc., he's going to run you off. You see, the most important thing to Phil is to surround himself with people who admire him. That makes him feel important. By weeding the successful people out of his circle, he gets to wax poetic about how he "only drinks the finest domestic macro brews" without getting called on his bullshit.

Everyone knows a guy like this. He's the guy who has his buddies over for beers so he can "big time" them. He'll make a big show about how generous he is with his beer. Then, he'll come out with a frosted mug for himself. "Nothing beats a cold one after a softball double-header, right guys? Feel free to drink my beer, but only the big guy gets the frosty mug. You guys can fight over who gets the koozie." He's also the guy who takes the extra base and slides in beer league softball games.

So that's pretty much phobia. He'll read this and pretend that he thinks it's sort of funny (but could be better if...). He may even poke a little fun at himself just to show how self-deprecating he can be. He doesn't think it's funny, though. He's WAY funnier than me. Don't believe him? Just ask any of the slightly older, slightly fatter, slightly less successful friends, and they'll back him up.

Pros: If frazod really wants to live in someone's head, phobia is the one guy who might be able to squeeze his fat ass in. Didn't really rip off a customer like billay said he did on his Facebook page.

Cons: Has a bizarre goatee size to face size ratio. Isn't a goatee supposed to at least be wider than your lips? Talks about how good he is at eating pussy to anyone who will listen...That must be a "thing" for middle aged dudes with beer guts and goatees because he's not the only one who does that, but it just creeps me the **** out.

Outlook for 2014: Bans hootie for no good reason...2,000 post threads fighting about it litter the front page for weeks...hootie comes back...sun rises, sun sets

76 Dave Lane

76. Dave Lane

Dave is the embodiment of "stuck in the 80s guy". He peaked back in the days when movie bad-guys rode dirt bikes and your t-shirts turned colors when they got hot or cold. It was a kick-ass time, and nobody kicked more ass than Dave. He bought the sweetest hot tub that Watson's had to offer, and he used to rail chicks in it with Mark Gubicza. ("With Mark" might be a bit of an overstatement, actually. I mean, it WAS Dave's wife that Gubie was dumping his nuts into while Mr. Lane cheered, but Dave didn't get to touch her until after Mark would leave. Still...Dave was sitting on the edge of the tub, and his feet were in the water, so that ****ing counts.)

Anyway, as the years went by, Dave kept doing the same things. Those things just became a little less cool with time. I mean, he was still watching Royals players with mullets turn his wife inside out in that very same hot tub, but the nineties didn't have that same magic about them. Sure, Jeff Montgomery had a mullet too...but it just wasn't the same. It's kind of hard to pinpoint what changed...Dave blames the AIDS epidemic. That does make a little sense, I guess. After all, when you have to fish used condoms out of the filter, you realize that the raw-dogging innocence of the eighties is gone forever. Still, Dave didn't exactly do himself any favors.

You see, Dave has a habit of pissing in the hot tub. No big deal. We've all done it. I'm not saying it's right, but everyone sort of accepts it. Dave's problem wasn't so much that he peed in the hot tub...it was the fact that he would do it when he wasn't even in the tub at the time, and that's just bad form. (I'm not going to have this conversation with you again, Dave. I understand that the same urine gets in the pool either way. It's still way grosser when you're arcing a boner-whiz into the tub from 15 feet away.)

So now, thirty years have passed. The party has ended, and his wife is gone, but Dave just can't let it go. He's still got the hot tub and the "Missouri Compromise" hair style, but now he has to settle for jacking it to old school porn...the kind on tapes you have to rewind when you're done. If you forget, and someone comes over and turns on the television, they immediately know what scene you finished to. In Dave's case, it's always either the scene shot from directly behind the dude's asshole or the one where they show the guy's face right as he busts.

I understand that accidents happen. The chick's titties are waggling back and forth...she's really into it...you're about to blow...and then...pow...they cut to the ol' back of the sack cam, and you can't shut it down in time. You know in your head that it doesn't make you queer, but you still just feel sad and uncomfortable the rest of the day...like people somehow know. Then, you just get pissed off at the movie because "who the **** decided that putting a camera there was a good idea? Nobody wants to see that shit". Well, people like Dave want to see that shit. And people like Dave pay for porn. So if you're looking for someone to blame, Dave's your guy.

Pros: Once saw Steve Gutterberg while eating at at the High Boy. Above-average break-dancer. Those lessons have really paid off.

Cons: Hates religion with a passion because, back when he was an altar boy, that really handsome priest touched everyone but him. (Dave...it's like your dad told you...it's not the sex he was after. It was the chase.) Has black lights in his room that make his bed spread look like it's covered in glow-in-the-dark maps of Hawaii.

Outlook for 2014: Slips into a deep depression after his VCR eats his only copy of Butt **** Sluts go Nuts volume IX.

75 KnowMo roasted by PGM

75. KnowMo2724

KnowMo is the typical, delusional Bronco fan...only on speed. He is one of the biggest homers to ever grace the board and has less football knowledge than Donger. Also, has a penchant for losing bets and welching on them in short order.*

He lives in his mom's basement and her meatloaf gives him the ability to post for hours at a time. She is pretty cool though. She takes him and his friends to Casa Bonita every year for his birthday to see the cliff divers and Black Bart's cave (ooooo scary). His most recent gift was a custom orange and blue 1974 Dodge Dart from Elway Motors.

Once, he convinced a drunken Hootie that he was a 22 year old college coed and a three way with a Peyton Manning fathead ensued. They then took pictures of the sheets covered in anal blood and framed them on the basement wall.

Positives: Went 16-0 in Madden on Pro difficulty after editing all Denver players to 99 overall. The meatloaf is pretty good. Only crossed swords once during the 3 way (swore that it was Peyton's, so it resumed).

Cons: He is Blackbob's Uncle everyone jokes about. Welches on bets. Still dresses as the Green Ranger for Halloween every year.

Outlook: After being found guilty in the trial he welches and comes back anyway. Never appears on the board again after Peydaton goes down in preseason ending his career.

74 Luv roasted by Mr. Flopnuts
Luv is a name that almost anyone on this board would recognize if they've been around for a while. You either know her as the passive aggressive old nag that tries to play mommy to the board, or you remember her antics in the beginning in which seeking out Daddy's approval she joined CP, only to have it turn into a forum to help her with her Daddy issues.

Over the years Luv has given us a litany of additions to the CP lexicon such as Grape gatorade, Moooo, and Endelt raped me. Of course that case took care of itself when in court proceedings Endelt got the case dismissed by simply asking the judge “How could it have been rape your honor? She was on top!”

Luv has also contributed greatly to our community by organizing the Springfield get togethers. Quite an accomplishment for someone to be able to organize board get togethers 200 miles away from the city the board is centrally located. There have been staggering numbers at these get togethers including 4, 3, 2, and a whole bunch of 1's.

What many people should really appreciate about Luv is that she is one of the members that takes a very personal approach to the board. And she's not afraid for the rest of us to learn from her mistakes. Such as, why you should never finance a car for a booty call you've been sleeping with for less than 3 months. How professing your illness on the board may lead someone of the opposite sex to picking up some grape gatorade for you and pounding your baby maker. Other gems include mid life crisis booty calls, and questioning the morals behind them after the deed has been done, how to find yourself in the friend zone with every individual you meet due to your own inability to hide your self consciousness, and why the postal service and their workers are such an important commodity to our society.

The good news is, after being laid off and taking the time to gain a certificate to become a paralegal from an onlinelocal instituion that offered an 18 week course, she is now no longer living with her father at 38 years of age, and only took a 40% pay cut. We should appreciate her showing us the value of a higher education. She really is an asset to the board, and someone we should appreciate being able to interact with on a daily basis.

Pros: This is a member that you have a legitimate shot of sleeping with, whether you are married or not. She's also someone that you can almost rest assured has less knowledge about the game of football than you do, which should help pump up your internet ego. Almost a guarantee to provide a laugh, and life lesson (or simple reminder) every time she starts a thread.

Cons: Doesn't include pics of numerous said booty calls (some may consider this a pro, apply to your life as needed) tends to be very passive aggressive when she disagrees with a take, or moderator decision. If you sleep with her, it may become a hot topic of board conversation for years to come.

Outlook for 2014: Luv is decreasing her activity on this board, but not in her online sexual life. This may change as her mid life crisis is transitioning from fun, to blowhard. Outside possibility of major board entertainment should she show up at this year's bash and sleep with Clay. Marriage is slim to none, as it's unlikely she'll ever take Daddy off of his pedestal and put a man in his place.

73. Mr Flopnuts (by Iowanian)

Hi Ma'am, is Chiefsplanet home? No? Well could you tell me where he is living now? Well we used to work together over at mumblemumble and I was trying to find him to pay him the money I owe him that I borrowed after we got a flat over on the bi-pass. I also wanted to tell him about the recent untimely departure of our good friend. So his number is 555-555-1122...thanks Ma'am.

Hi Chiefsplanet, It's flopnuts and your ass is being collected. Pay Video Adventure the late fees on those Disney movies or you're going to be sodomized by a 400lb man. Boom, Collected.

The name flopnuts was proven to be a poker reference when the planet learned that the poster maintaining the name hasn't been able to see his own unit under his panniculus since 1979.
If his skill in Texas holdem is similar to his track record as a mod, it's no wonder he's dealing strip club literature on the Branson boardwalk like an immigrant in front of Bills Casino in vegas.

Flopnuts brings alot to the table. Well, technically he takes more off of the table. Flopnuts has on occasion referred to as a pile of shit, well let me tell you friends I know this is not true. At his rotund stature if that were indeed true, he would be stinking out a town in Kansas.

Flopnuts is the Yin and Yang of Chiefsplanet, as it's not everyone who lives such a varying lifestyle. He buys his $3 elastic band sweat pants at Lane Bryant and his condoms at Baby Gap but he is able to maintain balance by contrasting demands of high road of moderating with low brow shots at posters unable to defend themselves. His new motto....Stay thirsty my friends.

When it comes to multitasking, flop was voted most efficient poster. It's not everyone who can fit that much dude and belongings into a smart car to relocate half way across the nation. Always the optimist, he proved the envy of NASA scientists by stretching his T-shirt collection over the top of the car, where he can both dry and keep the Hanes collection wrinkle free, but change the color every day. He wins cool points with Ricer drivers because they think the Tshirt pockets are a hood scoop. When it comes to attention, no one rivals his desire which is why he'll live the dream by entering the Nathan's 4th of July hog dog contest in his costume of nude.

Pros: Aspirations are reasonable and he will likely make his goal of having his pic on the home page of People of walmart. If you're looking for someone to take material from other posters and mold it into his own, flopnuts is your guy. Also winning in life.....just found $3.75 tucked into his fupa.

cons: Penned an epic roast of luv but spilled a jug of cookies bbq sauce on it and was unable to duplicate it.

Outlook for 2014: Successful failed diet thread, credit for continued attempts and more fat jokes.....a lot more fat jokes.

72. patteeu (by frazod)

Patteeu must be a retired lawyer. Nothing else makes sense. No one else could possibly have the time to argue about anything and everything, all the time, be so skilled at it, and get off on it so much. Some people lust for life. Patty lusts for strife. If strife was hot dogs, he'd be Takeru Kobayashi. If strife was blueberry pie vomit, he'd be Lard Ass Logan. Patty wants everybody fighting everybody else, constantly. He prefers political arguments, but any old fight will do. If you're an annoying troll, DaFace and/or Flopnuts may eventually be your personal savior, but patteeu is your champion. You complete him.

Patty's darkest day came in 2004, when he and the rest of the politards were cast down to the infernal reaches of the DC forum. And while our own little Lucifer has resigned himself to ruling in Hell (at least over the neocons), he still longs for a forum reunification, where football threads are buried beneath an avalanche of political crap, everybody is furious, and he is pleased enough to nearly remember what sexual arousal was like. In the meantime, he fans the flames of discontent in the main forum whenever an opportunity presents itself.

Pros: Despite championing anarchists on ChiefsPlanet, he is himself deeply conservative and a stalwart Republican, but really only in the stodgy, greedy big business sense. Not a big religion or NRA type of Republican. Although he did rush out to buy his first shotgun and tried his hand at hunting as soon as he heard about Dick Cheney shooting that guy in the face. Supports the troops, as long as that really doesn't entail him doing anything. Or giving them anything. Or talking to them. Or being around them. Eww. And there was a time when you'd have had to pay $400 an hour to listen to his crap, but now you get it for free!

Cons: Just because he goes to bat for you, doesn't mean he likes you. You are a vessel full of strife, and when the strife is exhausted, just as a junkie discards the empty baggie, you are of no further use to him. And his strife fix is sated via the internet, and not needed or requested in his rigidly-ordered real life. Just because he argued with Phobia for six months about the injustices of you getting banned doesn't mean you're friends, buster. Don't try to come to his gated community - he will call security.

Outlook: The world's going to hell in a handbasket, and patteeu's loving it! Expect more of the same. Over and over and over.

71. Bob Dole

To be perfectly honest, I'm not entirely sure that Bob actually exists. Sure, I've seen pictures of him, and I've heard people tell stories about seeing him in person...but I've seen pictures and heard stories about The Loch Ness Monster and Chupacabra as well. Frankly, the pictures and stories of him aren't that dissimilar to those of Bigfoot, so I remain skeptical.

When Bob was still a young schoolboy...shortly after the Treaty of Versailles was signed to end the Great War...he set out to make some friends. The popular kids played football, but Bobby was far too frail for such hurly-burly. He blamed his feebleness on polio, but the truth is...he was just a little bitch. That option being off the table, he did the next closest thing. He became a male cheerleader. Even in the dust-bowl days, it was pretty pathetic. I mean, he wasn't even one of the strong male cheerleaders who got to touch the girls' asses. He was more the "Rah Rah Rah, Sis Boom Bah" type. Unfortunately for little Bobby D, his cracking voice sounded even worse through a megaphone. Disappointed, but not discouraged, he turned in his sweater and joined the band and found his true calling.

He still had no discernible talent, but the victrolas used in those days weren't exactly high fidelity, so his shortcomings were less noticeable. Eventually, he got a full-time gig in Show Biz...as a member of the Rock-afire Explosion. It wasn't exactly Fibber McGee and Molly, but it beat working in the mines for two bits an hour, so he stuck it out for decades before ultimately being replaced by an automatonic Bear named Billy Bob.

Older, but wiser, he decided to start his own band. He went to his old high school's Battle of the Bands competition where he recruited new members by playing up his ability to buy beer for the band (a huge selling point for young teens) and get senior discounts at the Black Eyed Pea (less of a factor in their decision). Bob Dole was back.

Unfortunately for Bob and the rest of the band, this was back when MTV still played videos, and this radio star was the first casualty. It wasn't all bad, though. He did have a slight brush with fame when his song "Get Out of My Yard, Get Off of My Lawn" was overheard by a young Billy Ocean who later popularized a slightly re-branded version. Bob still receives royalty checks...and Social Security checks.

Pros: Voted for FDR four times. Invented the Hot Toddy

Cons: Still uses an old Sears catalog as spank material because he swears he saw a nipple showing through one of the lacier bras. (Bob...I know what you think you saw, but trust me on this one. The "red spot" you saw is simply an imperfection in the paper...not a nipple. I know this to be true because it's a black and white catalog). Eats dinner at 2 PM before leaving dimes as a tip.

Outlook for 2014: Falls. Can't get up.
70. Sweet Daddy Hate/Raised On Riots/Darth CarlSatan (roasted by Clay)70. Sweet Daddy Hate/Raised On Riots/Darth CarlSatan

It seems like everyone hates this douche but me, so I am well qualified to roast his ass up. Darth CarlSatan (I enjoy his original, unabashedly stupid, yet silly username the most) is often the butt of drug-related jokes, which is great because clearly he's smoking something to register on a forum where he's largely despised for a third time after being banned for reasons I've completely forgotten.

Used to be fat, like Frazod, but apparently got all lean and ripped up. Not clear whether it was completely due to illegal stimulants or some combination of those and the backbreaking manual labor that he was forced into since ex-cons usually can't get anything else. Rumor has it he's a roofer or something. Hootie tried to PM him to get some roofies upon learning this, only to discover roofing has nothing to do with selling date-rape drugs. DarthCarl hooked him up anyway, bringing his CP friend total to two.

Note: not sure if he actually IS an ex-con, but it fits with the whole "bad boy" persona he has attempted to cultivate since joining. Almost assuredly, he has posted from jail at least once.

Also claims to have wild sexual trysts from time to time in random dating threads. Unsure if he's been pleasing 190-pound soccer moms who invite him in for "a cool drink" when he comes down off the roofs he's thatching together, or if it's just luv and they're keeping it a dark, dirty CP secret. Hey, he had to do SOMETHING to bring his CP friend total to three.

Pros: Fucking hated Matt Cassel before it was cool to do so. Despite being in the top 10 most douchiest posters, has actually shown up to a pair of CP bashes. Wore a Brandon Flowers jersey that said "BMF" on the back. Oh wait, I think that part belongs in...

Cons: Yes, he was one. Is basically hated by everyone, save other douches, except Dane McCloud, who is No. 1 on Sweet Daddy Hate's "people to kill" list. I am now No. 2.
69.Setsuna (by rico) # 69: Setsuna

* I was hesitant to do this one because roasting Setsuna is eerily similar to literally roasting chocolate in a crock-pot. A meltdown is inevitable and things are bound to get messy.

* Setsuna is commonly referred to as “Token” on Chiefsplanet. I assume this is because he is our “token” Jaguars fan. Every NFL team’s message board has a Jags fan poster, since the Jags fanbase is so darn stupid, none of them have figured a way to create their own message board. So of course, they sponge off of other NFL teams’ boards. It’s either that, or he got the nickname because he has tendency to steal arcade game tokens from people. One thing that I’ve learned in life is to never trust a Jaguars fan, especially if you have any form of currency in your pockets.

* Setsuna has a year round tan. Must be freaking nice living in Florida, where the sun shines all year round. I’d love to not have to spend money on a tanning bed during the winter and I’m sure Simply Red can relate.

* Setsuna ended up making Chiefsplanet his home on accident. Initially, he was trying to locate a different planet with members who are more similar to him…planet of the apes. These people are more similar to him because in terms of science……..Setsuna is really interested in Science fiction.

* When you google the word, “Setsuna,” you will discover that it is a Japanese word meaning, “a moment; an instant.” I don’t know why, but when I read the word, “instant,” it immediately reminded me of Uncle Ben’s instant cream of wheat. I tell ya what, when that Uncle Ben’s package indicates the cream of wheat being “instant,” it means it. During the Olympics one summer, I was able to begin fixin’ a bowl of that at the start of a Michael Phelps swim race, and was finished so quickly that I was still able to catch the majority of Michael Phelps proving himself the master of the swim race. And speaking of uncles, I recently read a well-known, influential book titled, “Uncle Tom’s Cabin.” I’d recommend the book to Setsuna if I felt he was interested in any reading material besides Japanimation comics.

* Pros: I like him. He’s hands down, our best Jaguars troll. He is way better than Blackmon. With a username like, “Blackmon,” I knew that guy was no good from the start. Yup, a username based off a stereotypical trouble-makin’ Jacksonville Jaguar, racking up DUI’s and receiving a 4 game suspension for the start of the 2013 season due to violating the substance abuse policy. Sounds about right. Setsuna lives in Florida. I hear they grow good watermelon in Florida. Maybe he could bring some Florida watermelon up with him to Kansas City for a visit sometime…?!?! That would be nice of him.

* Cons: He is probably an ex-con (most Japanimation-Jaguars fans are). Ex-cons like Setsuna are the reason(s) why that bastard, Aaron Hernandez will probably get away with murder. Setsuna claimed he was going to convert from the Jags to being a Chiefs fan if the Chiefs ended up with Cyrus Gray and Tyler Bray on their roster. He did not follow through with this and honestly, I don’t know why I thought he would to begin with, for you can’t trust a Jaguars fan to remain faithful to his word. Oh well, once you go Jack, you never go back, I guess….

* Future Outlook: Chiefsplanet is like a horror movie and I predict Setsuna will be the first one to die in this shit-show. The reason being because of all this jazz I constantly hear about the Jaguars moving to Los Angeles. Jaguars fans are a dying breed.
68. Burt (by J Diddy) Burt #68

Burt is a swell guy. He's so swell that nobody knows who he is, yet has multiple posts. He lives in this sweet little land that prevents him from actually flashing his testerone and picking a side in an argument, thereby allowing him to remain anonymous.

Despite his anonymity there are a couple of things that we can gather. The first of which is he's dropping weight like a rock and by a rock we mean he's using meth. We think he's taking it from frazod because the lighter he gets, the fatter frazod gets. Also his hair is falling out too and he's acquired multiple automatic weapons for "recreational use." Overall not a bad dude but come on. You've got a problem.

Pros: Extremely mellow, has a monkey on his avatar that has more hair on his balls than burts hair.

Cons: Bad meth addiction that's turning him into frazod. Too fucking mellow, doesn't realize that "Burt" is a combination of two words "butt hurt" and needs to exercise that once. Seriously, grab some danglies.

Outlook: Most likely will die in a meth deal/gun deal/rogain deal gone bad at frazod's house in the next year or will continue to shrink to the size of an oompa loompa and go live amongst the lolliie pop kids.

67. petez28 (by PGM)

pete is best known on here for being a whiny little bitch. Anywhere there is a game thread, he is sure to be involved bleeding all over the place.

This extends to outside of the board as well. A few days ago, he became angry at his son's Little League game. A pitch to a Royal batter was called a strike even though it was a quarter inch off the plate according to the game tracker on his phone. He began cursing and a fellow dad decided to play White Knight. To the shame of his family, pete was choked out by a badass, drunk dentist.

Being a Jr. High girls softball ump gives him the right to question calls though in his mind. Unfortunately, he has to wear a cup to hide the shame boners of underage ass.

Pros: Drives a pretty sweet camaro. Mullets STILL rock.

Cons: On the rag 12 months out of the year. Boners with a cup on are very uncomfortable.

Outlook: Never posts again after a visit to Dr. Giggles

Iowanian
06-26-2013, 09:06 AM
73. flopnuts

Hi Ma'am, is Chiefsplanet home? No? Well could you tell me where he is living now? Well we used to work together over at mumblemumble and I was trying to find him to pay him the money I owe him that I borrowed after we got a flat over on the bi-pass. I also wanted to tell him about the recent untimely departure of our good friend. So his number is 555-555-1122...thanks Ma'am.

Hi Chiefsplanet, It's flopnuts and your ass is being collected. Pay Video Adventure the late fees on those Disney movies or you're going to be sodomized by a 400lb man. Boom, Collected.

The name flopnuts was proven to be a poker reference when the planet learned that the poster maintaining the name hasn't been able to see his own unit under his panniculus since 1979.
If his skill in Texas holdem is similar to his track record as a mod, it's no wonder he's dealing strip club literature on the Branson boardwalk like an immigrant in front of Bills Casino in vegas.

Flopnuts brings alot to the table. Well, technically he takes more off of the table. Flopnuts has on occasion referred to as a pile of shit, well let me tell you friends I know this is not true. At his rotund stature if that were indeed true, he would be stinking out a town in Kansas.

Flopnuts is the Yin and Yang of Chiefsplanet, as it's not everyone who lives such a varying lifestyle. He buys his $3 elastic band sweat pants at Lane Bryant and his condoms at Baby Gap but he is able to maintain balance by contrasting demands of high road of moderating with low brow shots at posters unable to defend themselves. His new motto....Stay thirsty my friends.

When it comes to multitasking, flop was voted most efficient poster. It's not everyone who can fit that much dude and belongings into a smart car to relocate half way across the nation. Always the optimist, he proved the envy of NASA scientists by stretching his T-shirt collection over the top of the car, where he can both dry and keep the Hanes collection wrinkle free, but change the color every day. He wins cool points with Ricer drivers because they think the Tshirt pockets are a hood scoop. When it comes to attention, no one rivals his desire which is why he'll live the dream by entering the Nathan's 4th of July hog dog contest in his costume of nude.

Pros: Aspirations are reasonable and he will likely make his goal of having his pic on the home page of People of walmart. If you're looking for someone to take material from other posters and mold it into his own, flopnuts is your guy. Also winning in life.....just found $3.75 tucked into his fupa.

cons: Penned an epic roast of luv but spilled a jug of cookies bbq sauce on it and was unable to duplicate it.

Outlook for 2014: Successful failed diet thread, credit for continued attempts and more fat jokes.....a lot more fat jokes.

loochy
06-26-2013, 09:24 AM
Pros: Aspirations are reasonable and he will likely make his goal of having his pic on the home page of People of walmart.

It looks like he has already achieved this goal.

http://i699.photobucket.com/albums/vv353/DUCHESS11/people_of_walmart_14.jpg

Saul Good
06-26-2013, 09:25 AM
I got paragraph deep before I realized what I was reading. Well done, though.

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 09:31 AM
Who's Nathan and what is important about his 4th of July party?

loochy
06-26-2013, 09:34 AM
Who's Nathan and what is important about his 4th of July party?

Nathan likes wieners.

His party involves guzzling many wieners.

patteeu
06-26-2013, 09:54 AM
then why am I not continually saying my side? frootie remembers it his way, I mine. I've accepted partial fault and am moving on. Why can't we all?

You're not the guy who brought it up. I think it's great that you've moved on. But others don't seem to be able to do it and Hootie shouldn't let them write the history.

patteeu
06-26-2013, 10:00 AM
Nice job, Iowanian.

Frosty
06-26-2013, 10:01 AM
So, is Flopnuts really the 73rd best poster on here or are people just going for the low hanging fruit now?

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 10:02 AM
You're not the guy who brought it up. I think it's great that you've moved on. But others don't seem to be able to do it and Hootie shouldn't let them write the history.

You are Hootie's CP Lawyer aren't you?

The Patteeu Team.

If you have a mod problem, if no one else can help, if he has time after constantly defending hootie's ignorant antics, maybe you can hire the Patteeu team.

rico
06-26-2013, 10:03 AM
That would make him the only one.

http://images.sodahead.com/polls/002865567/kjrjr-84537676062_xlarge.png

"Oh, stop it."

tooge
06-26-2013, 10:03 AM
flopnuts, low hanging fruit, coincidence?

vailpass
06-26-2013, 10:04 AM
So, is Flopnuts really the 73rd best poster on here or are people just going for the low hanging fruit now?

Flop is the goods, much better than 73.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 10:05 AM
flopnuts, low hanging fruit, coincidence?

Yup.

They're low balling him.

Frosty
06-26-2013, 10:05 AM
flopnuts, low hanging fruit, coincidence?

:D

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 10:13 AM
You're not the guy who brought it up. I think it's great that you've moved on. But others don't seem to be able to do it and Hootie shouldn't let them write the history.

Hootie is rewriting his-story.

Oh and good job keyboard - fruit of the doom.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 10:15 AM
Hootie is rewriting his-story.

Oh and good job keyboard - fruit of the doom.

It's useless. You're a cop and know it's pointless arguing with Hootie's cp lawyer. You need to get some legal aid immediately to defend against this.

Call BEP, as she may be available.

Hootie
06-26-2013, 10:31 AM
Phil why don't you link everyone to the post you made where I allegedly broke my "short leash" agreement.

blaise
06-26-2013, 10:41 AM
I don't really look at the numbers as rankings anymore. Just like chapters.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 11:14 AM
Phil why don't you link everyone to the post you made where I allegedly broke my "short leash" agreement.

Funny you mention this, Hootie. I was just researching items in the staff forum. There are literally 70 threads about you in the entire forum and that's just searching on "Hootie". I haven't even gotten to your other usernames and I'm not going to. I don't want to make a Rico post.

The original CC incident happened on 4-12-11. We corresponded about it at length. I told you that I disagreed that CC should have been able to ban you through infractions and I reinstated your account. I also told you that what CC revealed to you wasn't to be repeated or you would be permabanned. You lasted 3 days. You were permabanned on 4-15-11. At that time you told me, "I don't care about the permaban. I won't try and come back. Was tired of OTWP painting some sort of picture that didn't exist."

On 6-24-11 you begged to come back. Mods voted 4-1 against allowing you back.

On 11-23-11 You had managed to have some conflict with Frazod and (of all people) Dartgod. Your personal savior DaFace sent you this message, "OK, you're back in. However, know that 1) the mods certainly aren't unanimous in being willing to let you back in and 2) even I'm hesitant to do it. You've been banned and unbanned over and over again lately, so there's a lot of skepticism that you'll be able to hold it together this time.

Note the name change (to Short Leash Hootie). It's meant to be a reminder. If you behave yourself for a while, we might let you change it back. Until then, live with it.

The biggest thing that I can't emphasize enough is that you HAVE to learn to let things go once in a while. Frazod and Dartgod will probably try and get you riled up again, but unless they go over the line, the mods aren't going to do anything about it. If they're giving you a hard time, leave the thread. If you just can't help yourself, PM me, and I'll ban you from the thread (a new feature we added).

Suffice it to say, this will be the last chance you get. Your next ban will be your last, and there won't be any level of whining about it to get us to let you back in again."
On 1-13-12 you were permabanned again due to some continued feud with Frazod for which you had been warned to avoid several times. Even your personal savior DaFace said, "Well, at least he can't whine that he wasn't warned."

Another random regular n00b said, "Hootie committed suicide by mod."

At some point after that, I changed your permaban to 2 years because I hate you so much and because I figured you'd actually grow up in 2 years.

On Nov 17th, 2012 you registered your current account and exclaimed that you served 14 months which was more than long enough in your estimation when you never deserved to be banned in the first place. Not sure where you got 14 months but, I'm not sure your recollection is what it could be considering your Tuesday-Saturday binge drinking.

I'm not spending hours upon hours sifting through hundreds of posts about you in the mod forum. I dedicated an hour to it. I think the items I have cut and pasted prove that it's not just Phil being out to get you. I'm going to cut and paste this factual account of what actually happened each time you try to push off your "Poor Hootie never did anything wrong and is being picked on by Phil" load of horseshit. These are the facts. What you post time and time and time again are the incoherent ramblings of the town drunk. They're fiction. You're wrong, Hootie. Again. Surprise, surprise.

patteeu
06-26-2013, 11:19 AM
Funny you mention this, Hootie. I was just researching items in the staff forum. There are literally 70 threads about you in the entire forum and that's just searching on "Hootie". I haven't even gotten to your other usernames and I'm not going to. I don't want to make a Rico post.

The original CC incident happened on 4-12-11. We corresponded about it at length. I told you that I disagreed that CC should have been able to ban you through infractions and I reinstated your account. I also told you that what CC revealed to you wasn't to be repeated or you would be permabanned. You lasted 3 days. You were permabanned on 4-15-11. At that time you told me, "I don't care about the permaban. I won't try and come back. Was tired of OTWP painting some sort of picture that didn't exist."

On 6-24-11 you begged to come back. Mods voted 4-1 against allowing you back.

On 11-23-11 You had managed to have some conflict with Frazod and (of all people) Dartgod. Your personal savior DaFace sent you this message,
On 1-13-12 you were permabanned again due to some continued feud with Frazod for which you had been warned to avoid several times. Even your personal savior DaFace said, "Well, at least he can't whine that he wasn't warned."

Another random regular n00b said, "Hootie committed suicide by mod."

At some point after that, I changed your permaban to 2 years because I hate you so much and because I figured you'd actually grow up in 2 years.

On Nov 17th, 2012 you registered your current account and exclaimed that you served 14 months which was more than long enough in your estimation when you never deserved to be banned in the first place. Not sure where you got 14 months but, I'm not sure your recollection is what it could be considering your Tuesday-Saturday binge drinking.

I'm not spending hours upon hours sifting through hundreds of posts about you in the mod forum. I dedicated an hour to it. I think the items I have cut and pasted prove that it's not just Phil being out to get you. I'm going to cut and paste this factual account of what actually happened each time you try to push off your "Poor Hootie never did anything wrong and is being picked on by Phil" load of horseshit. These are the facts. What you post time and time and time again are the incoherent ramblings of the town drunk. They're fiction. You're wrong, Hootie. Again. Surprise, surprise.

Where are the parts where he did something wrong, other than bristling at the short leash that you put on him but not on the people who go out of their way to antagonize him?

Frazod
06-26-2013, 11:20 AM
I thought Flopnuts was Hootie's Personal Savior. Or is he just an additional Personal Savior?

Imagine having two Personal Saviors. That must be nice.

Does he appreciate DaFace any more than he does Flopnuts?

Donger
06-26-2013, 11:21 AM
Ouch.

loochy
06-26-2013, 11:23 AM
Where are the parts where he did something wrong, other than bristling at the short leash that you put on him but not on the people who go out of their way to antagonize him?

its super secret mod stuffs that we cant' even fathom

whatever rule he broke, it must not be that bad because he keeps getting to come back over and over and over

Phobia
06-26-2013, 11:24 AM
Where are the parts where he did something wrong, other than bristling at the short leash that you put on him but not on the people who go out of their way to antagonize him?

I'm done with it, patteeu. I've disproved every single claim Hootie makes. I've gone above and beyond what I need to do. I'm not spending any more time attempting to meet your requirements. I've done enough. Dartgod... really? Dartgod is probably the nicest guy on this entire site. I'll give you the Frazod antagonization. But DaFace was the guy corresponding most with Hootie and even Hootie claims he's the most fair of all the mods. The one quote from DaFace alone disproves everything Hootie has been saying about it being a vendetta from Phil.

patteeu
06-26-2013, 11:36 AM
I'm done with it, patteeu. I've disproved every single claim Hootie makes. I've gone above and beyond what I need to do. I'm not spending any more time attempting to meet your requirements. I've done enough. Dartgod... really? Dartgod is probably the nicest guy on this entire site. I'll give you the Frazod antagonization. But DaFace was the guy corresponding most with Hootie and even Hootie claims he's the most fair of all the mods. The one quote from DaFace alone disproves everything Hootie has been saying about it being a vendetta from Phil.

Frazod, OTWP, Crazycoffee, and Phobia seem to be his chief antagonists in this dance. Dartgod is a pretty friendly and nonantagonistic guy normally, but I suspect that he was a third man in on the side of Phobia or maybe Frazod here (am I right?).

I can't tell what you disproved other than maybe some dates that Hootie didn't remember right. On substance, Hootie seems to have it right. You put a constraint on him but let everyone else run relatively free. He bristled and rebelled, you pinched him for refusing to bend his knee to your authority.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 11:42 AM
Frazod, OTWP, Crazycoffee, and Phobia seem to be his chief antagonists in this dance. Dartgod is a pretty friendly and nonantagonistic guy normally, but I suspect that he was a third man in on the side of Phobia or maybe Frazod here (am I right?).

I can't tell what you disproved other than maybe some dates that Hootie didn't remember right. On substance, Hootie seems to have it right. You put a constraint on him but let everyone else run relatively free. He bristled and rebelled, you pinched him for refusing to bend his knee to your authority.

I suspect you don't have any idea what you're talking about. You clearly haven't read what I posted. As a result, this is my last response to you on this matter. I'm not going to waste my time on somebody who won't take 2 minutes to read and process what I took an hour to generate.

patteeu
06-26-2013, 11:50 AM
I suspect you don't have any idea what you're talking about. You clearly haven't read what I posted. As a result, this is my last response to you on this matter. I'm not going to waste my time on somebody who won't take 2 minutes to read and process what I took an hour to generate.

I read it. It didn't say much. That's my point. See you later. Maybe you should disappear more often when Hootie is around.

JimNasium
06-26-2013, 11:51 AM
I've never understood the fascination for nor the defense of Hootie or Goatboy. Both have contributed to an atmosphere that is barely tolerable for many of us.

Dinny Bossa Nova
06-26-2013, 11:59 AM
I've never understood the fascination for nor the defense of Hootie or Goatboy. Both have contributed to an atmosphere that is barely tolerable for many of us.

This. Barely tolerable is extremely kind.

Good to see ya, Nas. Can I buy you a beer sometime?

Dinny

Titty Meat
06-26-2013, 12:25 PM
Deez is a good poster. I haven't noticed that. But he's clearly bought into the Hootie hype. Too bad 98% of Hootie's recollection of the events is crap. It's all in the mod forum. Hooties version isn't in the vicinity of what actually happened.

It's the binge drinking

Dayze
06-26-2013, 12:27 PM
well damn..
:(

Frazod
06-26-2013, 12:27 PM
72. patteeu

Patteeu must be a retired lawyer. Nothing else makes sense. No one else could possibly have the time to argue about anything and everything, all the time, be so skilled at it, and get off on it so much. Some people lust for life. Patty lusts for strife. If strife was hot dogs, he'd be Takeru Kobayashi. If strife was blueberry pie vomit, he'd be Lard Ass Logan. Patty wants everybody fighting everybody else, constantly. He prefers political arguments, but any old fight will do. If you're an annoying troll, DaFace and/or Flopnuts may eventually be your personal savior, but patteeu is your champion. You complete him.

Patty's darkest day came in 2004, when he and the rest of the politards were cast down to the infernal reaches of the DC forum. And while our own little Lucifer has resigned himself to ruling in Hell (at least over the neocons), he still longs for a forum reunification, where football threads are buried beneath an avalanche of political crap, everybody is furious, and he is pleased enough to nearly remember what sexual arousal was like. In the meantime, he fans the flames of discontent in the main forum whenever an opportunity presents itself.

Pros: Despite championing anarchists on ChiefsPlanet, he is himself deeply conservative and a stalwart Republican, but really only in the stodgy, greedy big business sense. Not a big religion or NRA type of Republican. Although he did rush out to buy his first shotgun and tried his hand at hunting as soon as he heard about Dick Cheney shooting that guy in the face. Supports the troops, as long as that really doesn't entail him doing anything. Or giving them anything. Or talking to them. Or being around them. Eww. And there was a time when you'd have had to pay $400 an hour to listen to his crap, but now you get it for free!

Cons: Just because he goes to bat for you, doesn't mean he likes you. You are a vessel full of strife, and when the strife is exhausted, just as a junkie discards the empty baggie, you are of no further use to him. And his strife fix is sated via the internet, and not needed or requested in his rigidly-ordered real life. Just because he argued with Phobia for six months about the injustices of you getting banned doesn't mean you're friends, buster. Don't try to come to his gated community - he will call security.

Outlook: The world's going to hell in a handbasket, and patteeu's loving it! Expect more of the same. Over and over and over.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 12:35 PM
Heh. Patt. Somehow I'm getting the blame for that.

Frazod
06-26-2013, 12:40 PM
Ugh....that roast belongs in DC.

So does its subject.

Saul Good
06-26-2013, 12:44 PM
That was just awful.

Frazod
06-26-2013, 12:53 PM
That was just awful.

Well, I knew you wouldn't like it.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 12:53 PM
I thought Flopnuts was Hootie's Personal Savior. Or is he just an additional Personal Savior?

Imagine having two Personal Saviors. That must be nice.

Does he appreciate DaFace any more than he does Flopnuts?

Tenfold. And I worked much, much harder at actually getting him back here. It would bug me normally, but again, dude never got anything anyways. So I don't mind him licking Face's sack over it. He's sexy and all, but I'm married.

Saul Good
06-26-2013, 12:55 PM
I wasn't planning on doing one this afternoon, but I may have to just to cover that stench.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 12:56 PM
72. patteeu

Patteeu must be a retired lawyer. Nothing else makes sense. No one else could possibly have the time to argue about anything and everything, all the time, be so skilled at it, and get off on it so much. Some people lust for life. Patty lusts for strife. If strife was hot dogs, he'd be Takeru Kobayashi. If strife was blueberry pie vomit, he'd be Lard Ass Logan. Patty wants everybody fighting everybody else, constantly. He prefers political arguments, but any old fight will do. If you're an annoying troll, DaFace and/or Flopnuts may eventually be your personal savior, but patteeu is your champion. You complete him.

Patty's darkest day came in 2004, when he and the rest of the politards were cast down to the infernal reaches of the DC forum. And while our own little Lucifer has resigned himself to ruling in Hell (at least over the neocons), he still longs for a forum reunification, where football threads are buried beneath an avalanche of political crap, everybody is furious, and he is pleased enough to nearly remember what sexual arousal was like. In the meantime, he fans the flames of discontent in the main forum whenever an opportunity presents itself.

Pros: Despite championing anarchists on ChiefsPlanet, he is himself deeply conservative and a stalwart Republican, but really only in the stodgy, greedy big business sense. Not a big religion or NRA type of Republican. Although he did rush out to buy his first shotgun and tried his hand at hunting as soon as he heard about Dick Cheney shooting that guy in the face. Supports the troops, as long as that really doesn't entail him doing anything. Or giving them anything. Or talking to them. Or being around them. Eww. And there was a time when you'd have had to pay $400 an hour to listen to his crap, but now you get it for free!

Cons: Just because he goes to bat for you, doesn't mean he likes you. You are a vessel full of strife, and when the strife is exhausted, just as a junkie discards the empty baggie, you are of no further use to him. And his strife fix is sated via the internet, and not needed or requested in his rigidly-ordered real life. Just because he argued with Phobia for six months about the injustices of you getting banned doesn't mean you're friends, buster. Don't try to come to his gated community - he will call security.

Outlook: The world's going to hell in a handbasket, and patteeu's loving it! Expect more of the same. Over and over and over.

I chuckled a few times through this one. Well done!

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 12:57 PM
That was just awful.

The Kobayashi and Lard Ass Logan had me chuckling.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 12:57 PM
Saul, you have to beat it, or I'm adding it to the OP.

loochy
06-26-2013, 12:58 PM
1 pootie

Frazod
06-26-2013, 12:58 PM
The Kobayashi and Lard Ass Logan had me chuckling.

I thought the Cheney bit was the best.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 01:02 PM
The Cheney bit was a good one too. We may have to start considering shutting this thing down, and starting a new one. It's already starting lag, and double post. If we do, We'll transcribe the OP over to the new thread obviously and keep her going.

Hammock Parties
06-26-2013, 01:02 PM
I've never understood the fascination for nor the defense of Hootie or Goatboy. Both have contributed to an atmosphere that is barely tolerable for many of us.

You're such an old, farty whiner.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 01:22 PM
You're such an old, farty whiner.

JimNazium is one of the charter members and original funny posters on this site.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 01:49 PM
73. flopnuts

Hi Ma'am, is Chiefsplanet home? No? Well could you tell me where he is living now? Well we used to work together over at mumblemumble and I was trying to find him to pay him the money I owe him that I borrowed after we got a flat over on the bi-pass. I also wanted to tell him about the recent untimely departure of our good friend. So his number is 555-555-1122...thanks Ma'am.

Hi Chiefsplanet, It's flopnuts and your ass is being collected. Pay Video Adventure the late fees on those Disney movies or you're going to be sodomized by a 400lb man. Boom, Collected.

The name flopnuts was proven to be a poker reference when the planet learned that the poster maintaining the name hasn't been able to see his own unit under his panniculus since 1979.
If his skill in Texas holdem is similar to his track record as a mod, it's no wonder he's dealing strip club literature on the Branson boardwalk like an immigrant in front of Bills Casino in vegas.

Flopnuts brings alot to the table. Well, technically he takes more off of the table. Flopnuts has on occasion referred to as a pile of shit, well let me tell you friends I know this is not true. At his rotund stature if that were indeed true, he would be stinking out a town in Kansas.

Flopnuts is the Yin and Yang of Chiefsplanet, as it's not everyone who lives such a varying lifestyle. He buys his $3 elastic band sweat pants at Lane Bryant and his condoms at Baby Gap but he is able to maintain balance by contrasting demands of high road of moderating with low brow shots at posters unable to defend themselves. His new motto....Stay thirsty my friends.

When it comes to multitasking, flop was voted most efficient poster. It's not everyone who can fit that much dude and belongings into a smart car to relocate half way across the nation. Always the optimist, he proved the envy of NASA scientists by stretching his T-shirt collection over the top of the car, where he can both dry and keep the Hanes collection wrinkle free, but change the color every day. He wins cool points with Ricer drivers because they think the Tshirt pockets are a hood scoop. When it comes to attention, no one rivals his desire which is why he'll live the dream by entering the Nathan's 4th of July hog dog contest in his costume of nude.

Pros: Aspirations are reasonable and he will likely make his goal of having his pic on the home page of People of walmart. If you're looking for someone to take material from other posters and mold it into his own, flopnuts is your guy. Also winning in life.....just found $3.75 tucked into his fupa.

cons: Penned an epic roast of luv but spilled a jug of cookies bbq sauce on it and was unable to duplicate it.

Outlook for 2014: Successful failed diet thread, credit for continued attempts and more fat jokes.....a lot more fat jokes.

ROFL Holy shit. That was fantastic. You know, I don't know if you actually like me as a poster, moderator, or even a human being, but I think you're a funny, down to Earth, decent human being. So I'm honored that you decided to make your first roast, on me. It was a good one too. Although I did see my penis briefly in the early 90's, but it was a fluke. I'd never had a boner as big as the one Kathy Ireland gave me during Necessary Roughness.

All in all, a top 10 maybe even top 5 roast. Very well done, sir. :clap:

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 01:50 PM
Oh, and fuck you. I'm waaaaaaaay higher than 73. If we're just scrubbing the numbers system, we may as well do all of the awesome roasts now.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 02:01 PM
I'm assuming this thread was closed accidentally. If not, feel free to close it again. The old thread is closed for good reason, I'm assuming we made this one with the intention of it continuing on.

Frosty
06-26-2013, 02:04 PM
I figured Phobia closed it so that people would quit questioning him on everything.

ptlyon
06-26-2013, 02:04 PM
Luv sounds like the perfect woman!

Frazod
06-26-2013, 02:09 PM
I wasn't planning on doing one this afternoon, but I may have to just to cover that stench.

patteeu liked it. He gave me positive rep. :harumph:

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 02:13 PM
I figured Phobia closed it so that people would quit questioning him on everything.

Heh, Phobs is a big boy and doesn't isn't worried about explaining his position.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 02:14 PM
Luv sounds like the perfect an average woman!

FYP

loochy
06-26-2013, 02:28 PM
PHOBIA HATES HOOTIE AND BANNED HIM UNJUSTLY AND WONT EXPLAIN IT NOW

DaKCMan AP
06-26-2013, 02:29 PM
double

DaKCMan AP
06-26-2013, 02:30 PM
double

loochy
06-26-2013, 02:30 PM
i enjoy a good double double from in n out

rico
06-26-2013, 02:31 PM
I don't want to make a Rico post.

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/3555320/sheldon-sarcastic-laugh-o.gif

loochy
06-26-2013, 02:31 PM
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/3555320/sheldon-sarcastic-laugh-o.gif

tldw

rico
06-26-2013, 02:33 PM
tldw

You mean, "too wong;didn't wead?"

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 02:34 PM
Heh, Phobs is a big boy and doesn't isn't worried about explaining his position.

DOESN'T ISN'T?!!?!? WHATTA IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

loochy
06-26-2013, 02:35 PM
You mean, "too wong;didn't wead?"

it was an animated gif

it was too long so I didn't watch

tooge
06-26-2013, 02:35 PM
You know, doesn't want to and isn't gonna

rico
06-26-2013, 02:37 PM
it was an animated gif

it was too long so I didn't watch

Ohhhhhh okokok.... Flew over my head, hoochslice, but good one.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 02:44 PM
I'm assuming this thread was closed accidentally. If not, feel free to close it again. The old thread is closed for good reason, I'm assuming we made this one with the intention of it continuing on.

I'm guessing vBull automatically closed it when I copied from a closed thread. Didn't even notice but thanks.

DaKCMan AP
06-26-2013, 02:44 PM
i enjoy a good double double from in n out

Last week fucked around and got a triple double

Hootie
06-26-2013, 02:49 PM
PHOBIA HATES HOOTIE AND BANNED HIM UNJUSTLY AND WONT EXPLAIN IT NOW

it's probably somewhere in the middle

Phil's e-persona is a lot more like mine than he's willing to admit. Of course I'm more creative and garner more attention, which makes him jealous.

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 02:51 PM
I'm a pretty cool guy, right guys?

Hootie
06-26-2013, 02:53 PM
71. Thig Lyfe

Guy.

Pros: .jpg's

Cons: .gif's

Outlook: hush puppies; thigpen

Now STFU

loochy
06-26-2013, 02:56 PM
71. Thig Lyfe

Guy.

Pros: .jpg's

Cons: .gif's

Outlook: hush puppies; thigpen

Now STFU

0 pooties.

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 02:56 PM
71. Thig Lyfe

Guy.

Pros: .jpg's

Cons: .gif's

Outlook: hush puppies; thigpen

Now STFU

Hmm, this was underwhelming.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 02:58 PM
it's probably somewhere in the middle

Phil's e-persona is a lot more like mine than he's willing to admit. Of course I'm more creative and garner more attention, which makes him jealous.

I would enjoy giving you a purple nurple. Just saying.

Hootie
06-26-2013, 02:58 PM
damn I worked so hard on that one

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 03:00 PM
damn I worked so hard on that one

I appreciated the Hemingway-esque terseness but felt it lacked emotional depth.

Hootie
06-26-2013, 03:00 PM
I would enjoy giving you a purple nurple. Just saying.

I would enjoy people not on my intellectual level to stop quoting my posts...

so please, stop

how mad are you about Domino's extending that amazingly good carryout deal until Thursday? I bet you're busy.

Hootie
06-26-2013, 03:01 PM
I appreciated the Hemingway-esque terseness but felt it lacked emotional depth.

Cons: always gets erections while in the passenger seat of a car

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:03 PM
it's probably somewhere in the middle

Phil's e-persona is a lot more like mine than he's willing to admit. Of course I'm more creative and garner more attention, which makes him jealous.

I generate as much or as little attention as I please. Watch this.

loochy
06-26-2013, 03:04 PM
ROFL haha bant

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:07 PM
Summoning patteeu

Donger
06-26-2013, 03:07 PM
Well, I suppose that was inevitable. Bye Hootie. I'll admit that I was shocked to see him post that after what he wrote last night (kind of anyway).

Frazod
06-26-2013, 03:09 PM
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6lw37ejE11ra56fxo1_500.gif

Frazod
06-26-2013, 03:10 PM
0 pooties.

You've gone all Simon on us today.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 03:14 PM
Summoning patteeu

I have received a statement as he is not immediately available for comment. Here it is in it's entirety.



What we have witnessed is the most egregious of offenses. It was not racism, it was not sexism, no, it was a hatred that runs much deeper. This hatred is the vile devil's blood of the attention whore. This country cannot continue as one when the divides are so deep. Congressman need to be called, presidents need to be reached, military must be deployed. Hootie must be allowed to come back and attention whore or the fabric of the bulletin board will cease to exist. Tomorrow, we will petition the supreme court for a stay on this order and I have instructed my client to refrain from another 9 page manifesto that nobody cares to read. Hopefully, the emotional damage is not so great that he carves chiefsplanet.com in his leg with a rusty nail, as this has happened prior.

In summary, justice will be served. We will have our day in court.

loochy
06-26-2013, 03:15 PM
I have received a statement as he is not immediately available for comment. Here it is in it's entirety.

LMAO

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 03:20 PM
Cons: always gets erections while in the passenger seat of a car

Actually I lost my ability to get erections when I fought in World War I. So thanks for opening THAT wound.

rico
06-26-2013, 03:23 PM
Haha wow, I was just getting ready to post my 2nd attempt at roasting Hootie, where I predicted a ban as part of the "future outlook."

Btw, I seriously wanted to write the 2nd one in "non-tl;dr" form, but I finished it and while I didn't ramble about shit pertaining to myself...it's still long as freaking shit. I (and you assholes for that matter) just have to come to terms with the fact that I am incapable of being not long-winded.

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view4/1610321/kid-cant-kick-ball-o.gif

Sorter
06-26-2013, 03:24 PM
link to post that go him bant?

Detoxing
06-26-2013, 03:25 PM
link to post that go him bant?

There isnt one. Phobia just felt like fucking with him.

tooge
06-26-2013, 03:26 PM
Hamma time

Donger
06-26-2013, 03:26 PM
link to post that go him bant?

I'm guessing #78 in this thread. Hootie couldn't just leave it alone. But, we get to await the time of his return (again), when it all starts over (again).

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:27 PM
link to post that go him bant?

This time was just because I don't like him. I was tired of him lying about that. Now he's being truthful and he's gone. Win, win, win.

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 03:28 PM
link to post that go him bant?

It was probably his lackluster attempt at roasting me.

loochy
06-26-2013, 03:30 PM
It was probably his lackluster attempt at roasting me.

yeah probably

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 03:31 PM
This time was just because I don't like him. I was tired of him lying about that. Now he's being truthful and he's gone. Win, win, win.

Get ready. Patteeu's vagina is about to explode like Mt. St. Helens

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:31 PM
I'm guessing #78 in this thread. Hootie couldn't just leave it alone. But, we get to await the time of his return (again), when it all starts over (again).

More like #70. After I spent all that time this morning disproving him with direct quotes both from him and DaFace, he was putting blame in the middle now instead of accepting it. I'm done. He has a serious learning disability.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 03:31 PM
It was probably his lackluster attempt at roasting me.

I thought you were Simply Red

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:32 PM
It was probably his lackluster attempt at roasting me.

That was a strong factor as well.

Frazod
06-26-2013, 03:32 PM
Get ready. Patteeu's vagina is about to explode like Mt. St. Helens

http://c0190781.cdn.cloudfiles.rackspacecloud.com/499591387.jpg

Donger
06-26-2013, 03:33 PM
More like #70. After I spent all that time this morning disproving him with direct quotes both from him and DaFace, he was putting blame in the middle now instead of accepting it. I'm done. He has a serious learning disability.

Sorry, yes, #70.

Donger
06-26-2013, 03:33 PM
Get ready. Patteeu's vagina is about to explode like Mt. St. Helens

Patteeuclastic flow?

rico
06-26-2013, 03:34 PM
Haha, well FWIW (eat shit tl;dr police):

Hootie (2nd Attempt)

You moody, dramatic, prima-donna, whiney, little he-bitch.

* You are so gay (NTTAWWT). You have the CP username of an owl. You have the physique of an emu. You have a man-crush on a Seahawk (Russel Wilson). You are fruitier than the toucan on the Fruit Loops box. You have a tendency to grab cocks and brag about it on CP. To top things off, you are so light in the loafers that you are basically flying. I think the evidence is staggering. Hootie, you clearly are a man for the birds.

* Hootie is known to have a lot of "haters" on CP. He is also known to have had his share of homosexual encounters. Haters...homos....Hootie. H.H.H. TRIPLE H! Any connection to the WWE wrassler? If there is a connection, please do us ALL a favor and grab his penis and try to make out with him the next time you see him. In other words, do many of us a favor and kill yourself, Hootie. For the love of God, Hootie, if you love the members of CP as much as you claimed in your infamous womanifesto, then please off yourself so we don't have to read anymore roarin' from ROR about how you are on the path to doing so anyways...with your excessive drinking and all. And if you don't do it for us, do it for ROR, man. Stop being a selfish little prick and make ROR's wildest wishes and wet dreams come true. Will you go to hell? Yeah... probably. As I stated in my first "roast," it seems as if one of your biggest haters on this board is a user named, "luv" and considering that the name, "luv," implies "love," and Jesus is the poster boy for love, then Jesus hates you, which makes your chances of entry to heaven very, very slim, for I doubt Jesus wants to be around someone who he hates for eternity (especially if he's constantly having to swat your adulterous hands off his junk). Don't let that bother you though, Hootie. Hell won't be so bad. Darth Carl Satan will make sure your time spent in hell is enjoyable. He will take nice, nice care of you. He will be your sweet daddy...of hate.

* Hootie is notorious for his back and forth battles with a moderator named Phobia aka Phil. I remember first noticing these exchanges and thinking, "holy shit, along with sticking things up his ass, Hootie likes to stick it to the man!!!" However, recent statements made by Hootie to Phobia, such as, "you leave me alone, I'll pretend you no longer exist" and "let's truce it, you don't mention me or post about me, I don't mention you or post about you" made me realize that my initial thoughts of Hootie "sticking it to the man" were far from correct. In fact, he seems desperate to avoid Phobia at this point. Hootie has developed a phobia of Phobia. He is Phobiaphobic...and Dr. Phil refuses to help his sorry ass. What kind of weak, timid person develops an irrational fear of irrational fears? Seriously?

http://cdn.hark.com/images/000/739/452/739452/i-hear-your-sisters-goin-out_clink_large.jpg

A little bitch, that's who.

* Hootie recently mentioned moving from Dallas to Champaign. Which is ironic, for I can just imagine Clay and Hootie, drinking champagne and watching reruns of Dallas and having a gay old time together. Hootie of course, resting his champagne glass on this new “gym rat” version of Clay’s buns, while Clay simultaneously does push-ups, dreams of the day he receives his first vote on exploremodeling.com and works on his new Matt Cassel manifesto during commercial breaks. Some Hootie haters have claimes that Hootie is infatuated with Clay. Honestly, I can see it. In fact, I think it's gotten to the point where it has become borderline ridiculous. This claim is supported by Hootie's obsession with calling out Frazod for being fat. It has become clear to every member of CP that the formerly obese Clay has become a gym rat and now seems to possess a genuine hatred towards obese/fat people. No one can convince me that Hootie's obsessive rants of disgust in Frazod's weight aren't a direct result of him wanting to be like Clay, by hating on fat people. They say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. And 8 years ago, who the **** would have guessed that Hootie would become more fattery than Clay. With a beer-gut, just itching to catch up with him at age 28, it makes me wonder who else Hootie will "out-fat" 8 years from now? My guess is that Frazod is a possibility.

* Speaking of the show, "Dallas," and Hootie's time he spent living in the city, I bet when Hootie left Dallas, people weren't scratching their heads asking each other, "who shot Hootie?" If someone shot Hootie, no one from Dallas would give a shit. In fact, I assume they'd expect it. They'd be thinking, "well, it was bound to happen by some teenage girl's pissed off father anyways." If Hootie's friends from Dallas were under the impression that Hootie vanished because he died, I bet the real question on their minds is, "who ****ed him up the ass to give him the AIDS that probably killed him?" And they wouldn't be wondering because they were concerned with Hootie's well-being, but for their own safety because they want to make sure they don’t take it up the ass from that dude themselves...remember, these are in fact, Hootie's friends I am referring to. They all take it in the ass. He said it himself that his high school graduating class was “the gay class.” NTTAWWT.

* Hootie is developmentally disabled. The last I knew, “developmentally disabled” was considered the preferred nomenclature for “retarded.” (I genuinely do prefer using the preferred nomenclature). Over the years, Hootie has said some extremely offensive shit which has, on many occasions, been very hurtful to other CP members. However, any time someone confronts him of his past or present offensive statements, he immediately resorts to redirecting the blame to Dane in an attempt to justify his own actions. He references one statement made by Dane in particular. Dane apparently referred to someone who is a father of a child with special needs as a “retard breeder.” Therefore, whenever Hootie is threatened with another ban due to something he said, he immediately resorts to saying, “Dane called someone a retard-breeder!” And he doesn’t get off of it. He obsesses with that statement to justify his own actions. He is ****ing fixated with it. After a while, I began wondering why the hell he was so fixated on this one statement (in a forum that is literally an cesspool of ongoing offensive statements) and it became clear to me. Hootie is so offended and fixated with Dane’s “retard-breeder” statement because his own parents are “retard-breeders.” I understand, I would personally be little upset if someone referred to my mother as “fat.” So I can understand Hootie being distraught over his parents indirectly being referred to as “retard breeders” because of his own conception and birth. My thoughts on this were confirmed a couple days ago when Hootie posted a video of himself falling on a table and breaking it, followed by him beating the shit out of the table with one of the legs. His form, while beating the table with the leg, brought me right back to an evening where I chaperoned a Special Olympics softball practice 2 summers ago. A guy struck out due to not swinging at a pitch that hit home plate. He proceeded to throw a fit by attacking home plate with his baseball bat because he said “the plate moved” while the ball was pitched to him. While beating the shit out of home plate with his bat, his form looked exactly like Hootie beating the shit out of that table with the leg. Mirror freaking images of each other. This dude was the captain of the blue team. Due to disciplinary reasons, we had to find a new captain. This was a difficult task, for no one else on the team wanted to take his place. Damn it, if only Hootie would have been there, I’m sure he would have jumped at the opportunity to be captain. Captain Tasty Cheeks leading the blue team to victory!

* Pros: Texansplanet. I fully expect Hootie to eventually banter his way to "bant" status. And when that happens, Texansplanet may finally take off. Why is this a good thing? Well, when the Chiefs begin pursuing Matt Schaub as their QBOTF in a couple years, it will be convenient to check in to that site to see what the Texan fans have to say about the guy. (Hootie is not really developmentally disabled. Hootie is also funny sometimes, brings a lot to the board and has a unique mindset regarding football. Not to mention, he likes the movie “Baseketball,” which is a criminally underrated movie).

* Cons: Texansplanet. The loss of Hootie could potentially be a catastrophic loss for our beloved Chiefsplanet in terms of traffic and quality of posters. We all know that love him or hate him, Hootie is good for website traffic flow. Hootie has an abundance of both fanboys and haters. The majority of his fanboys MIGHT follow him to Texansplanet and his loyal haters, such as; J Diddy, Frazod, Donger, etc will SURELY follow him there and make that site their new home. That is an awful thought. I mean, honestly…how the **** will CP manage to survive a catastrophe as serious as losing Donger to Texansplanet? Donger is the driving force behind Chiefsplanet with his infinite wisdom, friendly demeanor, elaborate posts, anti-trolling stance and amazing football knowledge. I shudder at that thought.

* Outlook for the future: A permaban that lasts 6 months. A new womanifesto where we have to sift through the redundant “Dane” finger-pointing to justify his own actions which resulted in his banning. Also, a bunch of H's, for Hootie, that are likely to be prevalent in his future. In the future, Hootie will be: Hootie-style man-whoring; harassing Hugh Hefner; Herbie hand-cockin’ his hot dog to Hamas’s posts; hand-hockeying to Hustler; handling his ham; wipin’ hash-marks off his panty-hose; humpty dancin’ with heavy hippo-lookin’ chicks; happy-dancin’ with horse-cocks; hershey-squirtin’ on the chests of hefty heffers; hog-squirtin’ with Hog Farmer; hacking hairballs from huffing the hairy, hog-warty hoo-has of homeless hoes; humpin’ hoochie-mamas; hustlin’ hobos for their Hamm’s beer; heiling Hitler to heebs during Hanukkah; gettin’ hammered and hungover off Hennessey; a habitual offender doin' hard time; hunted by haters; hip-hurting the hipsters (way to go, Hootie); honking on hag-nipply hooters; receiving hummers from homos (NTTAWWT); receiving hand-jobs from hoodrats; receiving head from horny whores; engaging in hiney-sex with hemorrhoid-infested he-bitches; hooking up with hookers; hoarding STD’s such as HPV, herpes and HIV; having heart complications; denied from heaven and hell-bound to hang with Hate (Sweet Daddy style).

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 03:36 PM
I thought you were Simply Red

I wish. I think he's mad at me. :(

loochy
06-26-2013, 03:36 PM
GOOD LORD THAT WAS LONG
thats what she said

but no, even though it was all hootie focused, it was too long

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:36 PM
tl;dr

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 03:37 PM
).

could I get you to spoiler tag that so I don't have to scroll 3 pages please.

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 03:37 PM
yeah probably

This.

cosmo20002
06-26-2013, 03:37 PM
Get ready. Patteeu's vagina is about to explode like Mt. St. Helens

Donger's as well, but out of joy. I've never seen someone so turned on by ambiguous rule enforcement.

Donger
06-26-2013, 03:37 PM
Haha, well FWIW (eat shit tl;dr police)

Why did you bold the semicolons?

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:37 PM
I wish. I think he's mad at me. :(

Nah. That dude is your #1 fan. Come back Ryan.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 03:37 PM
I wish. I think he's mad at me. :(

Probably because you been jacking his fonts.

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 03:38 PM
That was a strong factor as well.

Tough, but fair.

Donger
06-26-2013, 03:38 PM
Donger's as well, but out of joy. I've never seen someone so turned on by ambiguous rule enforcement.

Incorrect. I was actually hoping that Hootie was starting to understand the situation last night. Seems I was incorrect.

cosmo20002
06-26-2013, 03:39 PM
Haha, well FWIW (eat shit tl;dr police):

Hootie (2nd Attempt)





OMG

I'm going to have to schedule a time on my Outlook calendar to get through this. Cancel my meetings today--Rico posted something!

LiveSteam
06-26-2013, 03:39 PM
Oh the Hoomanity of it all

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 03:41 PM
Probably because you been jacking his fonts.

I bumped an old thread of his so we could hang out there, and he thought I was mocking him. :(

Sorter
06-26-2013, 03:42 PM
It was probably his lackluster attempt at roasting me.

That pathetic attempt was ban worthy, IMO.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:43 PM
I bumped an old thread of his so we could hang out there, and he thought I was mocking him. :(

I like that dude but he's a big fat girl. Sorry Ryan. Girl you know it's true. Ooooh. Ooooh Oooooooooooh...

Sorter
06-26-2013, 03:44 PM
This time was just because I don't like him. I was tired of him lying about that. Now he's being truthful and he's gone. Win, win, win.

Fair enough.

NewChief
06-26-2013, 03:46 PM
Ahh, nothing like losing the moral high ground to Hootie. It takes skill.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:46 PM
Fair enough.

Not really. Now I really am being a big meanie.

Saul Good
06-26-2013, 03:47 PM
71. Bob Dole

To be perfectly honest, I'm not entirely sure that Bob actually exists. Sure, I've seen pictures of him, and I've heard people tell stories about seeing him in person...but I've seen pictures and heard stories about The Loch Ness Monster and Chupacabra as well. Frankly, the pictures and stories of him aren't that dissimilar to those of Bigfoot, so I remain skeptical.

When Bob was still a young schoolboy...shortly after the Treaty of Versailles was signed to end the Great War...he set out to make some friends. The popular kids played football, but Bobby was far too frail for such hurly-burly. He blamed his feebleness on polio, but the truth is...he was just a little bitch. That option being off the table, he did the next closest thing. He became a male cheerleader. Even in the dust-bowl days, it was pretty pathetic. I mean, he wasn't even one of the strong male cheerleaders who got to touch the girls' asses. He was more the "Rah Rah Rah, Sis Boom Bah" type. Unfortunately for little Bobby D, his cracking voice sounded even worse through a megaphone. Disappointed, but not discouraged, he turned in his sweater and joined the band and found his true calling.

He still had no discernible talent, but the victrolas used in those days weren't exactly high fidelity, so his shortcomings were less noticeable. Eventually, he got a full-time gig in Show Biz...as a member of the Rock-afire Explosion. It wasn't exactly Fibber McGee and Molly, but it beat working in the mines for two bits an hour, so he stuck it out for decades before ultimately being replaced by an automatonic Bear named Billy Bob.

Older, but wiser, he decided to start his own band. He went to his old high school's Battle of the Bands competition where he recruited new members by playing up his ability to buy beer for the band (a huge selling point for young teens) and get senior discounts at the Black Eyed Pea (less of a factor in their decision). Bob Dole was back.

Unfortunately for Bob and the rest of the band, this was back when MTV still played videos, and this radio star was the first casualty. It wasn't all bad, though. He did have a slight brush with fame when his song "Get Out of My Yard, Get Off of My Lawn" was overheard by a young Billy Ocean who later popularized a slightly re-branded version. Bob still receives royalty checks...and Social Security checks.

Pros: Voted for FDR four times. Invented the Hot Toddy

Cons: Still uses an old Sears catalog as spank material because he swears he saw a nipple showing through one of the lacier bras. (Bob...I know what you think you saw, but trust me on this one. The "red spot" you saw is simply an imperfection in the paper...not a nipple. I know this to be true because it's a black and white catalog). Eats dinner at 2 PM before leaving dimes as a tip.

Outlook for 2014: Falls. Can't get up.

Sorter
06-26-2013, 03:50 PM
71. Bob Dole

To be perfectly honest, I'm not entirely sure that Bob actually exists. Sure, I've seen pictures of him, and I've heard people tell stories about seeing him in person...but I've seen pictures and heard stories about The Loch Ness Monster and Chupacabra as well. Frankly, the pictures and stories of him aren't that dissimilar to those of Bigfoot, so I remain skeptical.

When Bob was still a young schoolboy...shortly after the Treaty of Versailles was signed to end the Great War...he set out to make some friends. The popular kids played football, but Bobby was far too frail for such hurly-burly. He blamed his feebleness on polio, but the truth is...he was just a little bitch. That option being off the table, he did the next closest thing. He became a male cheerleader. Even in the dust-bowl days, it was pretty pathetic. I mean, he wasn't even one of the strong male cheerleaders who got to touch the girls' asses. He was more the "Rah Rah Rah, Sis Boom Bah" type. Unfortunately for little Bobby D, his cracking voice sounded even worse through a megaphone. Disappointed, but not discouraged, he turned in his sweater and joined the band and found his true calling.

He still had no discernible talent, but the victrolas used in those days weren't exactly high fidelity, so his shortcomings were less noticeable. Eventually, he got a full-time gig in Show Biz...as a member of the Rock-afire Explosion. It wasn't exactly Fibber McGee and Molly, but it beat working in the mines for two bits an hour, so he stuck it out for decades before ultimately being replaced by an automatonic Bear named Billy Bob.

Older, but wiser, he decided to start his own band. He went to his old high school's Battle of the Bands competition where he recruited new members by playing up his ability to buy beer for band (a huge selling point for young teens) and get senior discounts at the Black Eyed Pea (less of a factor in their decision). Bob Dole was back.

Unfortunately for Bob and the rest of the band, this was back when MTV still played videos, and this radio star was the first casualty. It wasn't all bad, though. He did have a slight brush with fame when his song "Get Out of My Yard, Get Off of My Lawn" was overheard by a young Billy Ocean who later popularized a slightly re-branded version. Bob still receives royalty checks...and Social Security checks.

Pros: Voted for FDR four times. Invented the Hot Toddy

Cons: Still uses an old Sears catalog as spank material because he swears he saw a nipple showing through one of the lacier bras. (Bob...I know what you think you saw, but trust me on this one. The "red spot" you saw is simply an imperfection in the paper...not a nipple. I know this to be true because it's a black and white catalog). Eats dinner at 2 PM before leaving dimes as a tip.

Outlook for 2014: Falls. Can't get up.

Horrible.

Bob Dole is a saint.

Dayze
06-26-2013, 03:50 PM
"Voted for FDR Four Times" LMAO

Sorter
06-26-2013, 03:50 PM
Not really. Now I really am being a big meanie.

I'm sure he'll survive.

If not, then I suppose the world is saved from him procreating.

Frazod
06-26-2013, 03:52 PM
71. Bob Dole

To be perfectly honest, I'm not entirely sure that Bob actually exists. Sure, I've seen pictures of him, and I've heard people tell stories about seeing him in person...but I've seen pictures and heard stories about The Loch Ness Monster and Chupacabra as well. Frankly, the pictures and stories of him aren't that dissimilar to those of Bigfoot, so I remain skeptical.

When Bob was still a young schoolboy...shortly after the Treaty of Versailles was signed to end the Great War...he set out to make some friends. The popular kids played football, but Bobby was far too frail for such hurly-burly. He blamed his feebleness on polio, but the truth is...he was just a little bitch. That option being off the table, he did the next closest thing. He became a male cheerleader. Even in the dust-bowl days, it was pretty pathetic. I mean, he wasn't even one of the strong male cheerleaders who got to touch the girls' asses. He was more the "Rah Rah Rah, Sis Boom Bah" type. Unfortunately for little Bobby D, his cracking voice sounded even worse through a megaphone. Disappointed, but not discouraged, he turned in his sweater and joined the band and found his true calling.

He still had no discernible talent, but the victrolas used in those days weren't exactly high fidelity, so his shortcomings were less noticeable. Eventually, he got a full-time gig in Show Biz...as a member of the Rock-afire Explosion. It wasn't exactly Fibber McGee and Molly, but it beat working in the mines for two bits an hour, so he stuck it out for decades before ultimately being replaced by an automatonic Bear named Billy Bob.

Older, but wiser, he decided to start his own band. He went to his old high school's Battle of the Bands competition where he recruited new members by playing up his ability to buy beer for band (a huge selling point for young teens) and get senior discounts at the Black Eyed Pea (less of a factor in their decision). Bob Dole was back.

Unfortunately for Bob and the rest of the band, this was back when MTV still played videos, and this radio star was the first casualty. It wasn't all bad, though. He did have a slight brush with fame when his song "Get Out of My Yard, Get Off of My Lawn" was overheard by a young Billy Ocean who later popularized a slightly re-branded version. Bob still receives royalty checks...and Social Security checks.

Pros: Voted for FDR four times. Invented the Hot Toddy

Cons: Still uses an old Sears catalog as spank material because he swears he saw a nipple showing through one of the lacier bras. (Bob...I know what you think you saw, but trust me on this one. The "red spot" you saw is simply an imperfection in the paper...not a nipple. I know this to be true because it's a black and white catalog). Eats dinner at 2 PM before leaving dimes as a tip.

Outlook for 2014: Falls. Can't get up.

And you thought my patteeu roast was lame? :spock:

Phobia
06-26-2013, 03:52 PM
Bob Dole is entertaining. He'll get a kick out of him when somebody reads that to him.

LoneWolf
06-26-2013, 03:52 PM
Saul you have a talent for this that is unmatched on this board. Kudos, sir.

Frazod
06-26-2013, 03:53 PM
I'm sure he'll survive.

If not, then I suppose the world is saved from him procreating.

Assuming he hasn't already.

rico
06-26-2013, 03:56 PM
GOOD LORD THAT WAS LONG
thats what she said

but no, even though it was all hootie focused, it was too long

Can't help it loochay. I am the anti-Donger.


tl;dr

Yeah-yeah;yeah-yeah-yeah

could I get you to spoiler tag that so I don't have to scroll 3 pages please.

I don't know how.

Why did you bold the semicolons?

Haha, you caught that? That's funny that you noticed that. Great, now I'm beginning to like you. I didn't want the "H's" all running together.

OMG

I'm going to have to schedule a time on my Outlook calendar to get through this. Cancel my meetings today--Rico posted something!

Definitely...what I posted is VITAL information.

Donger
06-26-2013, 03:57 PM
Haha, you caught that? That's funny that you noticed that. Great, now I'm beginning to like you. I didn't want the "H's" all running together.

It's the only thing I noticed, to be honest.

rico
06-26-2013, 04:00 PM
It's the only thing I noticed, to be honest.

Haha, oh. FUCK YOU, DONGER!!!! I HATE YOU!!!!

















jk.

COchief
06-26-2013, 04:02 PM
It's getting pretty weak in here gentlemen... you know when Iowanian jumps in to try and help the ship from sinking things are getting tough.

Rico (who is this? the new "fax"?)
I read about 10% of each of your hootie roasts including the one that had like a 10 page buildup. You are absolutely terrible at these and should never do one again, your first slam was "hurr u gay sidecar-ed by a 20 year old Seinfeld joke". Just stop it please, your horde of fax-like ball lickers is warping your brain, much like Bieber fans have him believing he is a once in a generation musical talent, he's not (sorry) and neither are you when it comes to comedy.

Luv, Knowmo, and Bob Dole should have been easy homeruns for any long-time member, alas they did not meet expectations.

Is there an official list with the posters and numbers, or is everyone just picking at random? This is starting to piss me off, if I see a name I "like" I may have to jump in.

rico
06-26-2013, 04:03 PM
I liked the Bob Dole roast.

Did any other n00bs get the "pm Bob Dole, he'll be happy to answer your question" treatment whenever you asked a question? If so, how'd it go? I always wondered about the joke behind that.

Sorter
06-26-2013, 04:03 PM
It's getting pretty weak in here gentlemen... you know when Iowanian jumps in to try and help the ship from sinking things are getting tough.

Rico (who is this? the new "fax"?)
I read about 10% of each of your hootie roasts including the one that had like a 10 page buildup. You are absolutely terrible at these and should never do one again, your first slam was "hurr u gay sidecar-ed by a 20 year old Seinfeld joke". Just stop it please, your horde of fax-like ball lickers is warping where you should rank your sense of humor.

Luv, Knowmo, and Bob Dole should have been easy homeruns for any long-time member, alas they did not meet expectations.

Is there an official list with the posters and numbers, or is everyone just picking at random? This is starting to piss me off, if I see a name I "like" I may have to jump in.

I believe Saul initially tried to do it based on the rep list.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 04:06 PM
COchief:

Gay

Pros: Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Cons: Stares at your penis at the urinal.

Outlook: Penis and more penis.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 04:07 PM
I liked the Bob Dole roast.

Did any other n00bs get the "pm Bob Dole, he'll be happy to answer your question" treatment whenever you asked a question? If so, how'd it go? I always wondered about the joke behind that.

Bob Dole stopped reading his private messages in like 2002.

COchief
06-26-2013, 04:09 PM
COchief:

Gay

Pros: Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Cons: Stares at your penis at the urinal.

Outlook: Penis and more penis.

That's a pretty good summation of the recent "roasts" at least.

Saul Good
06-26-2013, 04:09 PM
It's getting pretty weak in here gentlemen... you know when Iowanian jumps in to try and help the ship from sinking things are getting tough.

Rico (who is this? the new "fax"?)
I read about 10% of each of your hootie roasts including the one that had like a 10 page buildup. You are absolutely terrible at these and should never do one again, your first slam was "hurr u gay sidecar-ed by a 20 year old Seinfeld joke". Just stop it please, your horde of fax-like ball lickers is warping your brain, much like Bieber fans have him believing he is a once in a generation musical talent, he's not (sorry) and neither are you when it comes to comedy.

Luv, Knowmo, and Bob Dole should have been easy homeruns for any long-time member, alas they did not meet expectations.

Is there an official list with the posters and numbers, or is everyone just picking at random? This is starting to piss me off, if I see a name I "like" I may have to jump in.

You've been here for eleven years, and I have no idea who you are. Get in the ring or shut the fuck up.

rico
06-26-2013, 04:10 PM
It's getting pretty weak in here gentlemen... you know when Iowanian jumps in to try and help the ship from sinking things are getting tough.

Rico (who is this? the new "fax"?)
I read about 10% of each of your hootie roasts including the one that had like a 10 page buildup. You are absolutely terrible at these and should never do one again, your first slam was "hurr u gay sidecar-ed by a 20 year old Seinfeld joke". Just stop it please, your horde of fax-like ball lickers is warping your brain, much like Bieber fans have him believing he is a once in a generation musical talent, he's not (sorry) and neither are you when it comes to comedy.

Luv, Knowmo, and Bob Dole should have been easy homeruns for any long-time member, alas they did not meet expectations.

Is there an official list with the posters and numbers, or is everyone just picking at random? This is starting to piss me off, if I see a name I "like" I may have to jump in.

I don't have any ball-lickers, like Fax. In fact, I'm generally disliked, I think, so join the circle jerk with everyone else and have fun, prag.

I am not a Seinfeld fan and couldn't quote ANYTHING from that show...so I am unsure as to what your are referring to....if it were the first paragraph, then the "this man is for the birds" is the only quote I ripped in the entire post and it wasn't from Seinfeld, it was from Norm Macdonald. And I posted that paragraph, mostly because I knew, at least Baby Lee would get the reference.

I don't know you, but man do you seem like a douche.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 04:11 PM
You've been here for eleven years, and I have no idea who you are. Get in the ring or shut the **** up.

My initial thought is that in 11 years, this page has more posts on it let alone the thread.

NewChief
06-26-2013, 04:13 PM
It's getting pretty weak in here gentlemen... you know when Iowanian jumps in to try and help the ship from sinking things are getting tough.

Rico (who is this? the new "fax"?)
I read about 10% of each of your hootie roasts including the one that had like a 10 page buildup. You are absolutely terrible at these and should never do one again, your first slam was "hurr u gay sidecar-ed by a 20 year old Seinfeld joke". Just stop it please, your horde of fax-like ball lickers is warping your brain, much like Bieber fans have him believing he is a once in a generation musical talent, he's not (sorry) and neither are you when it comes to comedy.

Luv, Knowmo, and Bob Dole should have been easy homeruns for any long-time member, alas they did not meet expectations.

Is there an official list with the posters and numbers, or is everyone just picking at random? This is starting to piss me off, if I see a name I "like" I may have to jump in.


It's Phobia's fault for unjustly banning Hootie. Without Hootie, this thread has lost its burst.
:p

loochy
06-26-2013, 04:15 PM
IN PROTEST OF HOOTIE'S BANNING, I AM GOING ON A POST STRIKE

I WILL NOT POST AGAIN UNTIL HOOTIE IS REINSTATED

loochy
06-26-2013, 04:16 PM
OK I'M DONE STRIKING NOW.

That's enough of that.

NewChief
06-26-2013, 04:16 PM
IN PROTEST OF HOOTIE'S BANNING, I AM GOING ON A POST STRIKE

I WILL NOT POST AGAIN UNTIL HOOTIE IS REINSTATED

So Hootie's ban is permanent, right mods?

NewChief
06-26-2013, 04:16 PM
OK I'M DONE STRIKING NOW.

That's enough of that.

Damnit!

loochy
06-26-2013, 04:17 PM
So Hootie's ban is permanent, right mods?

dude i already discontinued my strike

i didnt think chiefsplanet could survive without my worthless 1 liners

NewChief
06-26-2013, 04:18 PM
dude i already discontinued my strike

i didnt think chiefsplanet could survive without my worthless 1 liners

That was a two liner (three if you count the white space).

COchief
06-26-2013, 04:19 PM
I don't have any ball-lickers, like Fax. In fact, I'm generally disliked, I think, so join the circle jerk with everyone else and have fun, prag.

I am not a Seinfeld fan and couldn't quote ANYTHING from that show...so I am unsure as to what your are referring to....if it were the first paragraph, then the "this man is for the birds" is the only quote I ripped in the entire post and it wasn't from Seinfeld, it was from Norm Macdonald. And I posted that paragraph, mostly because I knew, at least Baby Lee would get the reference.

I don't know you, but man do you seem like a douche.

Where do you think NTTAWWT comes from doctor?

You do have an army of ball-lickers, hence the "come on Rico roast Hootie" for a hundred posts only to post the let down of all let downs (until your latest effort).

loochy
06-26-2013, 04:20 PM
That was a two liner (three if you count the white space).

that wasn't the type of worthless post i was referring to.

COchief
06-26-2013, 04:23 PM
You've been here for eleven years, and I have no idea who you are. Get in the ring or shut the **** up.

List son, where is it and I just might.

I did most of my noticeable posting pre 2005, I used to let loose on here from time to time. Now, I mostly stick to car threads and the occasional shit storm.

rico
06-26-2013, 04:24 PM
Where do you think NTTAWWT comes from doctor?

You do have an army of ball-lickers, hence the "come on Rico roast Hootie" for a hundred posts only to post the let down of all let downs (until your latest effort).


Meh, eat shit. Different strokes for different folks. 1st one was a let down, I admit. However, I don't care how much you, or anyone feels about the 2nd one though...I'm satisfied with it. It was long...I'm guessing that 99% of posters read less than you. But I am not ashamed of that one.

I didn't know NTTAWWT came from Seinfeld...I thought you were supposed to post that to avoid being banned from making discriminatory comments. Remember, I'm a n00b.

And those weren't ball-lickers...those were dudes eagerly wanting to laugh at my expense if (when) I tripped over my own dick...which I did.

Ya know what? You go to hell. You go to hell and you die, ****-ass.

loochy
06-26-2013, 04:27 PM
Meh, eat shit. Different strokes for different folks. 1st one was a let down, I admit. However, I don't care how much you, or anyone feels about the 2nd one though...I'm satisfied with it. It was long...I'm guessing that 99% of posters read less than you. But I am not ashamed of that one.

I didn't know NTTAWWT came from Seinfeld...I thought you were supposed to post that to avoid being banned from making discriminatory comments. Remember, I'm a n00b.

And those weren't ball-lickers...those were dudes eagerly wanting to laugh at my expense if (when) I tripped over my own dick...which I did.

Ya know what? You go to hell. You go to hell and you die, ****-ass.

It did indeed come from Seinfeld, but there's nothing wrong with that. If you are attempting to add to this thread (and site) then continue. We are just giving you a hard time about the TLDR (well kind of -your stuff IS long though that's what she said).

COchief
06-26-2013, 04:28 PM
Not even trying to be hostile rico, just flat out telling you that you are absolutely terrible at this and please stop. Look at the other responses...the people have spoken! We have commanded you to stop. Also in this case, same strokes for all folks, everyone thought it sucked.

Yes, they were licking your balls, so much so, that I found myself greatly anticipating this hero to come forth for which the people were beckoning. And then...well you know.

You might be the coolest guy on the planet, but a roaster you are not.

rico
06-26-2013, 04:30 PM
It did indeed come from Seinfeld, but there's nothing wrong with that. If you are attempting to add to this thread (and site) then continue. We are just giving you a hard time about the TLDR (well kind of -your stuff IS long though that's what she said).

The tl;dr stuff doesn't bother me. I deserve the razzing. I've been long-winded as shit on here.

Thanks for complimenting my size. Not only is it long, but it is also gerthy.

cosmo20002
06-26-2013, 04:30 PM
Meh, eat shit. Different strokes for different folks. 1st one was a let down, I admit. However, I don't care how much you, or anyone feels about the 2nd one though...I'm satisfied with it. It was long...I'm guessing that 99% of posters read less than you. But I am not ashamed of that one.

I didn't know NTTAWWT came from Seinfeld...I thought you were supposed to post that to avoid being banned from making discriminatory comments. Remember, I'm a n00b.


Jerry was being profiled by a newspaper and the reporter, observing his behavior with George (like an old bickering married couple) assumed they were gay. They didn't want that in the paper, so Jerry and George furiously protested, but then, not wanting to seem homophobic, concluded with, "Not That There's Anything Wrong With That!"

Now you know.

LiveSteam
06-26-2013, 04:38 PM
Jerry was being profiled by a newspaper and the reporter, observing his behavior with George (like an old bickering married couple) assumed they were gay. They didn't want that in the paper, so Jerry and George furiously protested, but then, not wanting to seem homophobic, concluded with, "Not That There's Anything Wrong With That!"

Now you know.

You really are Cosmo Kramer

rico
06-26-2013, 04:39 PM
Not even trying to be hostile rico, just flat out telling you that you are absolutely terrible at this and please stop. Look at the other responses...the people have spoken! We have commanded you to stop. Also in this case, same strokes for all folks, everyone thought it sucked.

Yes, they were licking your balls, so much so, that I found myself greatly anticipating this hero to come forth for which the people were beckoning. And then...well you know.

You might be the coolest guy on the planet, but a roaster you are not.

You read 10% of it and thought I was copying Seinfeld...a show that I avoid watching. And you read 10% of the first one....yet you have the audacity to tell me what I am and what I'm not? Haha, good God some of the people you'll encounter on here.

And I still don't care if everyone thought it sucked...I'm still not ashamed of the second one. It was too lengthy, yeah. Other than that, I'm fine with what the 2nd one consisted of...

Not trying to be hostile? Go to hell.

rico
06-26-2013, 04:41 PM
Jerry was being profiled by a newspaper and the reporter, observing his behavior with George (like an old bickering married couple) assumed they were gay. They didn't want that in the paper, so Jerry and George furiously protested, but then, not wanting to seem homophobic, concluded with, "Not That There's Anything Wrong With That!"

Now you know.

Ahh, I see, I see. I did not know that.

I remember Roy from The Office saying it in one episode...can't remember which one though...I think he said he thought Jim was gay and followed by saying, "NTTAWWT." Must have been a Seinfeld reference.

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 04:45 PM
hey rico, Seinfeld is actually pretty good, you should give it another shot buddy

rico
06-26-2013, 04:48 PM
hey rico, Seinfeld is actually pretty good, you should give it another shot buddy

I don't know what my dealio has been with that show...I've just never been in the right "mode" to watch it, I guess. Every time it was ever on, I was always distracted by something and didn't really know the "shticks" of the characters.

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 04:52 PM
I don't know what my dealio has been with that show...I've just never been in the right "mode" to watch it, I guess. Every time it was ever on, I was always distracted by something and didn't really know the "shticks" of the characters.

Try starting with the Chinese Restaurant episode in Season 1 and work from there.

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 04:53 PM
Nathan likes wieners.

His party involves guzzling many wieners.

Awesome, how did I miss this gem

Donger
06-26-2013, 04:54 PM
This rico person sort of reminds me of crazycoffey a few years ago. Rather.... energetic.

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 05:01 PM
JimNazium is one of the charter members and original funny posters on this site.

And he should be here more often. Tighten the leash on the drama trolls.

Hammock Parties
06-26-2013, 05:01 PM
Phobiaphobic should be Hootie's new username.

rico
06-26-2013, 05:12 PM
This rico person sort of reminds me of crazycoffey a few years ago. Rather.... energetic.

Trollin' on cc, Dongalicious?

Saul Good
06-26-2013, 05:14 PM
List son, where is it and I just might.

I did most of my noticeable posting pre 2005, I used to let loose on here from time to time. Now, I mostly stick to car threads and the occasional shit storm.

There is no list, you dong.

Donger
06-26-2013, 05:15 PM
Trollin' on cc, Dongalicious?

No, it was just an honest observation.

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 05:17 PM
Ahh, I see, I see. I did not know that.

I remember Roy from The Office saying it in one episode...can't remember which one though...I think he said he thought Jim was gay and followed by saying, "NTTAWWT." Must have been a Seinfeld reference.

Actually both Seinfeld and the office got NTTAWWT from chiefs planet.

rico
06-26-2013, 05:21 PM
No, it was just an honest observation.

Oh, cool observations, broseph! :thumb:


Actually both Seinfeld and the office got NTTAWWT from chiefs planet.

I should have known. Seinfeld, The Office, Rome.....who the hell is next?!?!?!?!

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 05:22 PM
Trollin' on cc, Dongalicious?

It's actually an insult to you. You see, CP was my very first Internet BB experience and I just didn't know proper protocol or have any real frame of reference to how it all works. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer.

And that's where donger man was headed. With an insult. Cyber slap.

rico
06-26-2013, 05:28 PM
It's actually an insult to you. You see, CP was my very first Internet BB experience and I just didn't know proper protocol or have any real frame of reference to how it all works. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer.

And that's where donger man was headed. With an insult. Cyber slap.

Ahh I see.

Up yours, Donger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:mad:

Donger
06-26-2013, 05:29 PM
It's actually an insult to you. You see, CP was my very first Internet BB experience and I just didn't know proper protocol or have any real frame of reference to how it all works. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer. Filler words and more filler words to make this post longer.

And that's where donger man was headed. With an insult. Cyber slap.

That's odd. I don't remember thinking that your posts were overly long. Just that you posted with the rapidity of a hummingbird on speed.

But, I could be mistaken.

Frazod
06-26-2013, 05:50 PM
That's odd. I don't remember thinking that your posts were overly long. Just that you posted with the rapidity of a hummingbird on speed.

But, I could be mistaken.

More like a puppy that's so happy and excited to be in the room with all the people that he pees on the rug without realizing it while jumping up and down.

KC native
06-26-2013, 05:55 PM
hey rico, Seinfeld is actually pretty good, you should give it another shot buddy

I disagree.

KC native
06-26-2013, 05:56 PM
Ahh, nothing like losing the moral high ground to Hootie. It takes skill.

ROFL

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 05:59 PM
That's odd. I don't remember thinking that your posts were overly long. Just that you posted with the rapidity of a hummingbird on speed.

But, I could be mistaken.

I was trying to post like Rico. Damn, I thought you were smart

patteeu
06-26-2013, 06:04 PM
patteeu liked it. He gave me positive rep. :harumph:

Yeah, I thought it was pretty good. I feel like I got the kid glove treatment though. It makes me think you like me more than you let on.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 06:10 PM
Yeah, I thought it was pretty good. I feel like I got the kid glove treatment though. It makes me think you like me more than you let on.

You weren't around when they banned hootie so I passed your message on.

Donger
06-26-2013, 06:15 PM
I was trying to post like Rico. Damn, I thought you were smart

I wasn't referring to his loquaciousness. I was referring to his "enthusiasm."

patteeu
06-26-2013, 06:27 PM
You weren't around when they banned hootie so I passed your message on.

Thanks. You've got a bright future as an errand boy. Did you get my text about picking up my dry cleaning?

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 06:31 PM
I wasn't referring to his loquaciousness. I was referring to his "enthusiasm."

How does enthusiasm translate in written word?

Donger
06-26-2013, 06:35 PM
How does enthusiasm translate in written word?

It varies, but perhaps you've heard of the exclamation mark?

And, I'd say that a high level of posting also shows enthusiasm.

rico
06-26-2013, 06:36 PM
How does enthusiasm translate in written word?

Depends on the language.

SAUTO
06-26-2013, 06:46 PM
I met bob dole once
Posted via Mobile Device

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 06:47 PM
DOESN'T ISN'T?!!?!? WHATTA IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Right? What the fuck was is doesn't wasn't that?

Haha, well FWIW (eat shit tl;dr police):

Hootie (2nd Attempt)

You moody, dramatic, prima-donna, whiney, little he-bitch.

* You are so gay (NTTAWWT). You have the CP username of an owl. You have the physique of an emu. You have a man-crush on a Seahawk (Russel Wilson). You are fruitier than the toucan on the Fruit Loops box. You have a tendency to grab cocks and brag about it on CP. To top things off, you are so light in the loafers that you are basically flying. I think the evidence is staggering. Hootie, you clearly are a man for the birds.

* Hootie is known to have a lot of "haters" on CP. He is also known to have had his share of homosexual encounters. Haters...homos....Hootie. H.H.H. TRIPLE H! Any connection to the WWE wrassler? If there is a connection, please do us ALL a favor and grab his penis and try to make out with him the next time you see him. In other words, do many of us a favor and kill yourself, Hootie. For the love of God, Hootie, if you love the members of CP as much as you claimed in your infamous womanifesto, then please off yourself so we don't have to read anymore roarin' from ROR about how you are on the path to doing so anyways...with your excessive drinking and all. And if you don't do it for us, do it for ROR, man. Stop being a selfish little prick and make ROR's wildest wishes and wet dreams come true. Will you go to hell? Yeah... probably. As I stated in my first "roast," it seems as if one of your biggest haters on this board is a user named, "luv" and considering that the name, "luv," implies "love," and Jesus is the poster boy for love, then Jesus hates you, which makes your chances of entry to heaven very, very slim, for I doubt Jesus wants to be around someone who he hates for eternity (especially if he's constantly having to swat your adulterous hands off his junk). Don't let that bother you though, Hootie. Hell won't be so bad. Darth Carl Satan will make sure your time spent in hell is enjoyable. He will take nice, nice care of you. He will be your sweet daddy...of hate.

* Hootie is notorious for his back and forth battles with a moderator named Phobia aka Phil. I remember first noticing these exchanges and thinking, "holy shit, along with sticking things up his ass, Hootie likes to stick it to the man!!!" However, recent statements made by Hootie to Phobia, such as, "you leave me alone, I'll pretend you no longer exist" and "let's truce it, you don't mention me or post about me, I don't mention you or post about you" made me realize that my initial thoughts of Hootie "sticking it to the man" were far from correct. In fact, he seems desperate to avoid Phobia at this point. Hootie has developed a phobia of Phobia. He is Phobiaphobic...and Dr. Phil refuses to help his sorry ass. What kind of weak, timid person develops an irrational fear of irrational fears? Seriously?

http://cdn.hark.com/images/000/739/452/739452/i-hear-your-sisters-goin-out_clink_large.jpg

A little bitch, that's who.

* Hootie recently mentioned moving from Dallas to Champaign. Which is ironic, for I can just imagine Clay and Hootie, drinking champagne and watching reruns of Dallas and having a gay old time together. Hootie of course, resting his champagne glass on this new “gym rat” version of Clay’s buns, while Clay simultaneously does push-ups, dreams of the day he receives his first vote on exploremodeling.com and works on his new Matt Cassel manifesto during commercial breaks. Some Hootie haters have claimes that Hootie is infatuated with Clay. Honestly, I can see it. In fact, I think it's gotten to the point where it has become borderline ridiculous. This claim is supported by Hootie's obsession with calling out Frazod for being fat. It has become clear to every member of CP that the formerly obese Clay has become a gym rat and now seems to possess a genuine hatred towards obese/fat people. No one can convince me that Hootie's obsessive rants of disgust in Frazod's weight aren't a direct result of him wanting to be like Clay, by hating on fat people. They say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. And 8 years ago, who the **** would have guessed that Hootie would become more fattery than Clay. With a beer-gut, just itching to catch up with him at age 28, it makes me wonder who else Hootie will "out-fat" 8 years from now? My guess is that Frazod is a possibility.

* Speaking of the show, "Dallas," and Hootie's time he spent living in the city, I bet when Hootie left Dallas, people weren't scratching their heads asking each other, "who shot Hootie?" If someone shot Hootie, no one from Dallas would give a shit. In fact, I assume they'd expect it. They'd be thinking, "well, it was bound to happen by some teenage girl's pissed off father anyways." If Hootie's friends from Dallas were under the impression that Hootie vanished because he died, I bet the real question on their minds is, "who ****ed him up the ass to give him the AIDS that probably killed him?" And they wouldn't be wondering because they were concerned with Hootie's well-being, but for their own safety because they want to make sure they don’t take it up the ass from that dude themselves...remember, these are in fact, Hootie's friends I am referring to. They all take it in the ass. He said it himself that his high school graduating class was “the gay class.” NTTAWWT.

* Hootie is developmentally disabled. The last I knew, “developmentally disabled” was considered the preferred nomenclature for “retarded.” (I genuinely do prefer using the preferred nomenclature). Over the years, Hootie has said some extremely offensive shit which has, on many occasions, been very hurtful to other CP members. However, any time someone confronts him of his past or present offensive statements, he immediately resorts to redirecting the blame to Dane in an attempt to justify his own actions. He references one statement made by Dane in particular. Dane apparently referred to someone who is a father of a child with special needs as a “retard breeder.” Therefore, whenever Hootie is threatened with another ban due to something he said, he immediately resorts to saying, “Dane called someone a retard-breeder!” And he doesn’t get off of it. He obsesses with that statement to justify his own actions. He is ****ing fixated with it. After a while, I began wondering why the hell he was so fixated on this one statement (in a forum that is literally an cesspool of ongoing offensive statements) and it became clear to me. Hootie is so offended and fixated with Dane’s “retard-breeder” statement because his own parents are “retard-breeders.” I understand, I would personally be little upset if someone referred to my mother as “fat.” So I can understand Hootie being distraught over his parents indirectly being referred to as “retard breeders” because of his own conception and birth. My thoughts on this were confirmed a couple days ago when Hootie posted a video of himself falling on a table and breaking it, followed by him beating the shit out of the table with one of the legs. His form, while beating the table with the leg, brought me right back to an evening where I chaperoned a Special Olympics softball practice 2 summers ago. A guy struck out due to not swinging at a pitch that hit home plate. He proceeded to throw a fit by attacking home plate with his baseball bat because he said “the plate moved” while the ball was pitched to him. While beating the shit out of home plate with his bat, his form looked exactly like Hootie beating the shit out of that table with the leg. Mirror freaking images of each other. This dude was the captain of the blue team. Due to disciplinary reasons, we had to find a new captain. This was a difficult task, for no one else on the team wanted to take his place. Damn it, if only Hootie would have been there, I’m sure he would have jumped at the opportunity to be captain. Captain Tasty Cheeks leading the blue team to victory!

* Pros: Texansplanet. I fully expect Hootie to eventually banter his way to "bant" status. And when that happens, Texansplanet may finally take off. Why is this a good thing? Well, when the Chiefs begin pursuing Matt Schaub as their QBOTF in a couple years, it will be convenient to check in to that site to see what the Texan fans have to say about the guy. (Hootie is not really developmentally disabled. Hootie is also funny sometimes, brings a lot to the board and has a unique mindset regarding football. Not to mention, he likes the movie “Baseketball,” which is a criminally underrated movie).

* Cons: Texansplanet. The loss of Hootie could potentially be a catastrophic loss for our beloved Chiefsplanet in terms of traffic and quality of posters. We all know that love him or hate him, Hootie is good for website traffic flow. Hootie has an abundance of both fanboys and haters. The majority of his fanboys MIGHT follow him to Texansplanet and his loyal haters, such as; J Diddy, Frazod, Donger, etc will SURELY follow him there and make that site their new home. That is an awful thought. I mean, honestly…how the **** will CP manage to survive a catastrophe as serious as losing Donger to Texansplanet? Donger is the driving force behind Chiefsplanet with his infinite wisdom, friendly demeanor, elaborate posts, anti-trolling stance and amazing football knowledge. I shudder at that thought.

* Outlook for the future: A permaban that lasts 6 months. A new womanifesto where we have to sift through the redundant “Dane” finger-pointing to justify his own actions which resulted in his banning. Also, a bunch of H's, for Hootie, that are likely to be prevalent in his future. In the future, Hootie will be: Hootie-style man-whoring; harassing Hugh Hefner; Herbie hand-cockin’ his hot dog to Hamas’s posts; hand-hockeying to Hustler; handling his ham; wipin’ hash-marks off his panty-hose; humpty dancin’ with heavy hippo-lookin’ chicks; happy-dancin’ with horse-cocks; hershey-squirtin’ on the chests of hefty heffers; hog-squirtin’ with Hog Farmer; hacking hairballs from huffing the hairy, hog-warty hoo-has of homeless hoes; humpin’ hoochie-mamas; hustlin’ hobos for their Hamm’s beer; heiling Hitler to heebs during Hanukkah; gettin’ hammered and hungover off Hennessey; a habitual offender doin' hard time; hunted by haters; hip-hurting the hipsters (way to go, Hootie); honking on hag-nipply hooters; receiving hummers from homos (NTTAWWT); receiving hand-jobs from hoodrats; receiving head from horny whores; engaging in hiney-sex with hemorrhoid-infested he-bitches; hooking up with hookers; hoarding STD’s such as HPV, herpes and HIV; having heart complications; denied from heaven and hell-bound to hang with Hate (Sweet Daddy style).

Seriously. I'm trying. Really, really, trying to read some of these posts. But I can't. If it's not funny in the first 4 paragraphs, what makes me think that will change in the next 40? I'm not trying to be a dick, but sometimes honesty is a big, fat, cock.

Donger
06-26-2013, 06:49 PM
More like a puppy that's so happy and excited to be in the room with all the people that he pees on the rug without realizing it while jumping up and down.

LMAO

Yes, or that.

rico
06-26-2013, 06:51 PM
Right? What the **** was is doesn't wasn't that?



Seriously. I'm trying. Really, really, trying to read some of these posts. But I can't. If it's not funny in the first 4 paragraphs, what makes me think that will change in the next 40? I'm not trying to be a dick, but sometimes honesty is a big, fat, cock.

Join the crowd, it's presumably a large one.

Still not ashamed of this one. I think some of the puns were lost in the verbiage...when it became too long, I actually tried doing that...so I'm fine with it. They are all mostly just a bunch of pointless gags, nothing more, nothing less... and as intended.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 06:57 PM
Join the crowd, it's presumably a large one.

Still not ashamed of this one. I think some of the puns were lost in the verbiage...when it became too long, I actually tried doing that...so I'm fine with it. They are all mostly just a bunch of pointless gags, nothing more, nothing less... and as intended.

too short; didn't read

blaise
06-26-2013, 06:58 PM
I won't read that, rico, because it's mind boggling to me that you can't grasp that you need to cut 75% of that.

rico
06-26-2013, 07:00 PM
too short; didn't read

http://www.defendernetwork.com/-art/10/07/12/03/Too-Short-300x200.jpg

Wut?! U no make no cents.

If Too Short didn't read, then how on Earth did he create such groundbreaking lyrics?

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 07:00 PM
Join the crowd, it's presumably a large one.

Still not ashamed of this one. I think some of the puns were lost in the verbiage...when it became too long, I actually tried doing that...so I'm fine with it. They are all mostly just a bunch of pointless gags, nothing more, nothing less... and as intended.

Well I'm not trolling you, don't dislike you, or any of the other nonsense. Just keepin it real. My Luv roast should've been much better. I just pussed out and didn't drop any of the really big hammers. So what the fuck do I know?

rico
06-26-2013, 07:01 PM
Well I'm not trolling you, don't dislike you, or any of the other nonsense. Just keepin it real. My Luv roast should've been much better. I just pussed out and didn't drop any of the really big hammers. So what the **** do I know?

I know your not, I know you don't, I know you are and I thought the Luv roast was fine....?

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 07:04 PM
I know your not, I know you don't, I know you are and I thought the Luv roast was fine....?

There's a lot more material on her, but it's deeply personal, and I didn't have the heart to bring all the heat because I know her personally, and know for a fact she'll take what was already said far too personally, the rest may have pushed her over some edge.

rico
06-26-2013, 07:05 PM
There's a lot more material on her, but it's deeply personal, and I didn't have the heart to bring all the heat because I know her personally, and know for a fact she'll take what was already said far too personally, the rest may have pushed her over some edge.

Understandable, man.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 07:06 PM
On another note, you're a good dude, plenty of funny in other arenas, I just think the roasts are not your strong suit. But whatev, who gives a shit what I think? I also think Saul's Bob Dole roast was the worst one he's churned out yet. But it was still better than your 2nd Hootie roast. Don't shoot the messenger. :shrug:

patteeu
06-26-2013, 07:07 PM
Catching up:

1. Rico, rico, rico. Don't let these guys discourage you. Yeah, try #2 was still a little long, but I think that if you do it one more time you can nail it. This time, try to keep it under 200 words. Don't try to compete with Saul Good, he's a master. Just try to post something that everyone will read with one or two decent jokes in it. You might think about asking seclark to help you edit it.

2. Saul Good's roasts can't be touched, but I like the way others are giving it a go.

3. I was away this afternoon working on a rico-length indictment of Phobia for capricious acts of moderation based on personal bias, but when I got back I found that he's already made the case for me. TL;DR=Thanks Phobia.

Frazod
06-26-2013, 07:09 PM
There's a lot more material on her, but it's deeply personal, and I didn't have the heart to bring all the heat because I know her personally, and know for a fact she'll take what was already said far too personally, the rest may have pushed her over some edge.

Also, she's a roller derby chick, she can probably beat the fuck out of you. :$2500:

LoneWolf
06-26-2013, 07:12 PM
Right? What the **** was is doesn't wasn't that?



Seriously. I'm trying. Really, really, trying to read some of these posts. But I can't. If it's not funny in the first 4 paragraphs, what makes me think that will change in the next 40? I'm not trying to be a dick, but sometimes honesty is a big, fat, cock.

I applaud Rico's effort because that is a shit load to type, but it simply isn't funny. Reading that whole Grapes of Wrath length post and trying to find the funny reminds me of going to a comedy club and the comedian is awful. It's uncomfortable for everyone and the few laughs and applause are forced and born out of pity. I haven't attempted a roast so I feel a little prickish criticizing Rico's efforts, but damn.

Mr_Tomahawk
06-26-2013, 07:14 PM
What's the point of a countdown when multiple people are doing the roast?

BigRedChief
06-26-2013, 07:17 PM
It's actually an insult to you. You see, CP was my very first Internet BB experience and I just didn't know proper protocol or have any real frame of reference to how it all works.And you still got voted the "King of the N00bs" that year by the vets.

rico
06-26-2013, 07:20 PM
On another note, you're a good dude, plenty of funny in other arenas, I just think the roasts are not your strong suit. But whatev, who gives a shit what I think? I also think Saul's Bob Dole roast was the worst one he's churned out yet. But it was still better than your 2nd Hootie roast. Don't shoot the messenger. :shrug:

Writing stories is more up my alley. I've actually had moderate success with that in the past....some crazy good breaks and some really shitty ones.

Roasting isn't my thing, but I do think some things did get lost in the verbiage on this one...which is fine, it's my "shtick," I guess. And the "H words" at the end...I don't care if anyone liked them or not, I straight up had fun coming up with them. Therefore it wasn't a bad dealio for me...I had fun.

Catching up:

1. Rico, rico, rico. Don't let these guys discourage you. Yeah, try #2 was still a little long, but I think that if you do it one more time you can nail it. This time, try to keep it under 200 words. Don't try to compete with Saul Good, he's a master. Just try to post something that everyone will read with one or two decent jokes in it. You might think about asking seclark to help you edit it.

2. Saul Good's roasts can't be touched, but I like the way others are giving it a go.

3. I was away this afternoon working on a rico-length indictment of Phobia for capricious acts of moderation based on personal bias, but when I got back I found that he's already made the case for me. TL;DR=Thanks Phobia.

Meh, I'm not discouraged. Definitely not trying to compete with Saul Good. He's got his own style going on, and it's working...type of stuff that no one, but Saul Good can come up with. It's unique, original and very creative...I've never really read/witnessed anyone with his exact style of generating humor, which is a huge compliment.

BigRedChief
06-26-2013, 07:27 PM
So Hootie's ban is permanent, right mods?WTH? Hootie is banned again. ROFL

What did he do this time?

DaFace
06-26-2013, 07:27 PM
What's the point of a countdown when multiple people are doing the roast?

Because it's funny?

rico
06-26-2013, 07:29 PM
I applaud Rico's effort because that is a shit load to type, but it simply isn't funny. Reading that whole Grapes of Wrath length post and trying to find the funny reminds me of going to a comedy club and the comedian is awful. It's uncomfortable for everyone and the few laughs and applause are forced and born out of pity. I haven't attempted a roast so I feel a little prickish criticizing Rico's efforts, but damn.

Fair enough.

I'm still not ashamed of this one. In retrospect, I don't like the entire Dallas to Champagne shit...but nothing any of you people say are going to make me feel generally ashamed about this one.

LoneWolf
06-26-2013, 07:33 PM
Fair enough.

I'm still not ashamed of this one.

Never be ashamed of anything you put an honest effort into. Trying, failing, and learning from those failures is what separates the Rico's from the Hootie's of the world. Keep on keepin on, brother.

Mr. Flopnuts
06-26-2013, 07:34 PM
Fair enough.

I'm still not ashamed of this one. In retrospect, I don't like the entire Dallas to Champagne shit...but nothing any of you people say are going to make me feel generally ashamed about this one.

If it was truly shameful, I wouldn't have made any criticism at all. I would've watched the train derail, and put my head down until I got home.

Saul Good
06-26-2013, 07:39 PM
Rico is the energy guy. He's not the star of the show. He may lack the pure talent, but he gets by on his heart. Riles up the crowd for when the real talent comes in.

What I'm saying is...he's kind of my fluffer.

rico
06-26-2013, 07:39 PM
If it was truly shameful, I wouldn't have made any criticism at all. I would've watched the train derail, and put my head down until I got home.

There are a couple paragraphs that are just gag-happy and pretty stupid....and obviously, I have an affinity for and inclination to generate really stupid shit. However, I almost feel the need to (BRIEFLY) explain the motives behind a couple of the paragraphs, but will spare y'all.

rico
06-26-2013, 07:40 PM
Rico is the energy guy. He's not the star of the show. He may lack the pure talent, but he gets by on his heart. Riles up the crowd for when the real talent comes in.

What I'm saying is...he's kind of my fluffer.

LMAO

LoneWolf
06-26-2013, 07:41 PM
Rico is the energy guy. He's not the star of the show. He may lack the pure talent, but he gets by on his heart. Riles up the crowd for when the real talent comes in.

What I'm saying is...he's kind of my fluffer.

Rico is your Flava Flav. Yeaaahhh Boooooyyyy!

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 07:49 PM
I disagree.

FUCK U

Thig Lyfe
06-26-2013, 07:49 PM
WTH? Hootie is banned again. ROFL

What did he do this time?

He put minimal effort into roasting me. That's not gonna fly, hombre.

LoneWolf
06-26-2013, 07:55 PM
He put minimal effort into roasting me. That's not gonna fly, hombre.

Thig Lyfe can't be roasted. He has to be deep fried just like delicious LJS hush puppies.

BigRedChief
06-26-2013, 08:00 PM
I've never understood the fascination for nor the defense of Hootie or Goatboy. Both have contributed to an atmosphere that is barely tolerable for many of us.

Missed hanging with you Jim, talking high school football. You should hang more often.

-King-
06-26-2013, 08:15 PM
Haha, well FWIW (eat shit tl;dr police):

Hootie (2nd Attempt)

You moody, dramatic, prima-donna, whiney, little he-bitch.

* You are so gay (NTTAWWT). You have the CP username of an owl. You have the physique of an emu. You have a man-crush on a Seahawk (Russel Wilson). You are fruitier than the toucan on the Fruit Loops box. You have a tendency to grab cocks and brag about it on CP. To top things off, you are so light in the loafers that you are basically flying. I think the evidence is staggering. Hootie, you clearly are a man for the birds.

* Hootie is known to have a lot of "haters" on CP. He is also known to have had his share of homosexual encounters. Haters...homos....Hootie. H.H.H. TRIPLE H! Any connection to the WWE wrassler? If there is a connection, please do us ALL a favor and grab his penis and try to make out with him the next time you see him. In other words, do many of us a favor and kill yourself, Hootie. For the love of God, Hootie, if you love the members of CP as much as you claimed in your infamous womanifesto, then please off yourself so we don't have to read anymore roarin' from ROR about how you are on the path to doing so anyways...with your excessive drinking and all. And if you don't do it for us, do it for ROR, man. Stop being a selfish little prick and make ROR's wildest wishes and wet dreams come true. Will you go to hell? Yeah... probably. As I stated in my first "roast," it seems as if one of your biggest haters on this board is a user named, "luv" and considering that the name, "luv," implies "love," and Jesus is the poster boy for love, then Jesus hates you, which makes your chances of entry to heaven very, very slim, for I doubt Jesus wants to be around someone who he hates for eternity (especially if he's constantly having to swat your adulterous hands off his junk). Don't let that bother you though, Hootie. Hell won't be so bad. Darth Carl Satan will make sure your time spent in hell is enjoyable. He will take nice, nice care of you. He will be your sweet daddy...of hate.

* Hootie is notorious for his back and forth battles with a moderator named Phobia aka Phil. I remember first noticing these exchanges and thinking, "holy shit, along with sticking things up his ass, Hootie likes to stick it to the man!!!" However, recent statements made by Hootie to Phobia, such as, "you leave me alone, I'll pretend you no longer exist" and "let's truce it, you don't mention me or post about me, I don't mention you or post about you" made me realize that my initial thoughts of Hootie "sticking it to the man" were far from correct. In fact, he seems desperate to avoid Phobia at this point. Hootie has developed a phobia of Phobia. He is Phobiaphobic...and Dr. Phil refuses to help his sorry ass. What kind of weak, timid person develops an irrational fear of irrational fears? Seriously?

http://cdn.hark.com/images/000/739/452/739452/i-hear-your-sisters-goin-out_clink_large.jpg

A little bitch, that's who.

* Hootie recently mentioned moving from Dallas to Champaign. Which is ironic, for I can just imagine Clay and Hootie, drinking champagne and watching reruns of Dallas and having a gay old time together. Hootie of course, resting his champagne glass on this new “gym rat” version of Clay’s buns, while Clay simultaneously does push-ups, dreams of the day he receives his first vote on exploremodeling.com and works on his new Matt Cassel manifesto during commercial breaks. Some Hootie haters have claimes that Hootie is infatuated with Clay. Honestly, I can see it. In fact, I think it's gotten to the point where it has become borderline ridiculous. This claim is supported by Hootie's obsession with calling out Frazod for being fat. It has become clear to every member of CP that the formerly obese Clay has become a gym rat and now seems to possess a genuine hatred towards obese/fat people. No one can convince me that Hootie's obsessive rants of disgust in Frazod's weight aren't a direct result of him wanting to be like Clay, by hating on fat people. They say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. And 8 years ago, who the **** would have guessed that Hootie would become more fattery than Clay. With a beer-gut, just itching to catch up with him at age 28, it makes me wonder who else Hootie will "out-fat" 8 years from now? My guess is that Frazod is a possibility.

* Speaking of the show, "Dallas," and Hootie's time he spent living in the city, I bet when Hootie left Dallas, people weren't scratching their heads asking each other, "who shot Hootie?" If someone shot Hootie, no one from Dallas would give a shit. In fact, I assume they'd expect it. They'd be thinking, "well, it was bound to happen by some teenage girl's pissed off father anyways." If Hootie's friends from Dallas were under the impression that Hootie vanished because he died, I bet the real question on their minds is, "who ****ed him up the ass to give him the AIDS that probably killed him?" And they wouldn't be wondering because they were concerned with Hootie's well-being, but for their own safety because they want to make sure they don’t take it up the ass from that dude themselves...remember, these are in fact, Hootie's friends I am referring to. They all take it in the ass. He said it himself that his high school graduating class was “the gay class.” NTTAWWT.

* Hootie is developmentally disabled. The last I knew, “developmentally disabled” was considered the preferred nomenclature for “retarded.” (I genuinely do prefer using the preferred nomenclature). Over the years, Hootie has said some extremely offensive shit which has, on many occasions, been very hurtful to other CP members. However, any time someone confronts him of his past or present offensive statements, he immediately resorts to redirecting the blame to Dane in an attempt to justify his own actions. He references one statement made by Dane in particular. Dane apparently referred to someone who is a father of a child with special needs as a “retard breeder.” Therefore, whenever Hootie is threatened with another ban due to something he said, he immediately resorts to saying, “Dane called someone a retard-breeder!” And he doesn’t get off of it. He obsesses with that statement to justify his own actions. He is ****ing fixated with it. After a while, I began wondering why the hell he was so fixated on this one statement (in a forum that is literally an cesspool of ongoing offensive statements) and it became clear to me. Hootie is so offended and fixated with Dane’s “retard-breeder” statement because his own parents are “retard-breeders.” I understand, I would personally be little upset if someone referred to my mother as “fat.” So I can understand Hootie being distraught over his parents indirectly being referred to as “retard breeders” because of his own conception and birth. My thoughts on this were confirmed a couple days ago when Hootie posted a video of himself falling on a table and breaking it, followed by him beating the shit out of the table with one of the legs. His form, while beating the table with the leg, brought me right back to an evening where I chaperoned a Special Olympics softball practice 2 summers ago. A guy struck out due to not swinging at a pitch that hit home plate. He proceeded to throw a fit by attacking home plate with his baseball bat because he said “the plate moved” while the ball was pitched to him. While beating the shit out of home plate with his bat, his form looked exactly like Hootie beating the shit out of that table with the leg. Mirror freaking images of each other. This dude was the captain of the blue team. Due to disciplinary reasons, we had to find a new captain. This was a difficult task, for no one else on the team wanted to take his place. Damn it, if only Hootie would have been there, I’m sure he would have jumped at the opportunity to be captain. Captain Tasty Cheeks leading the blue team to victory!

* Pros: Texansplanet. I fully expect Hootie to eventually banter his way to "bant" status. And when that happens, Texansplanet may finally take off. Why is this a good thing? Well, when the Chiefs begin pursuing Matt Schaub as their QBOTF in a couple years, it will be convenient to check in to that site to see what the Texan fans have to say about the guy. (Hootie is not really developmentally disabled. Hootie is also funny sometimes, brings a lot to the board and has a unique mindset regarding football. Not to mention, he likes the movie “Baseketball,” which is a criminally underrated movie).

* Cons: Texansplanet. The loss of Hootie could potentially be a catastrophic loss for our beloved Chiefsplanet in terms of traffic and quality of posters. We all know that love him or hate him, Hootie is good for website traffic flow. Hootie has an abundance of both fanboys and haters. The majority of his fanboys MIGHT follow him to Texansplanet and his loyal haters, such as; J Diddy, Frazod, Donger, etc will SURELY follow him there and make that site their new home. That is an awful thought. I mean, honestly…how the **** will CP manage to survive a catastrophe as serious as losing Donger to Texansplanet? Donger is the driving force behind Chiefsplanet with his infinite wisdom, friendly demeanor, elaborate posts, anti-trolling stance and amazing football knowledge. I shudder at that thought.

* Outlook for the future: A permaban that lasts 6 months. A new womanifesto where we have to sift through the redundant “Dane” finger-pointing to justify his own actions which resulted in his banning. Also, a bunch of H's, for Hootie, that are likely to be prevalent in his future. In the future, Hootie will be: Hootie-style man-whoring; harassing Hugh Hefner; Herbie hand-cockin’ his hot dog to Hamas’s posts; hand-hockeying to Hustler; handling his ham; wipin’ hash-marks off his panty-hose; humpty dancin’ with heavy hippo-lookin’ chicks; happy-dancin’ with horse-cocks; hershey-squirtin’ on the chests of hefty heffers; hog-squirtin’ with Hog Farmer; hacking hairballs from huffing the hairy, hog-warty hoo-has of homeless hoes; humpin’ hoochie-mamas; hustlin’ hobos for their Hamm’s beer; heiling Hitler to heebs during Hanukkah; gettin’ hammered and hungover off Hennessey; a habitual offender doin' hard time; hunted by haters; hip-hurting the hipsters (way to go, Hootie); honking on hag-nipply hooters; receiving hummers from homos (NTTAWWT); receiving hand-jobs from hoodrats; receiving head from horny whores; engaging in hiney-sex with hemorrhoid-infested he-bitches; hooking up with hookers; hoarding STD’s such as HPV, herpes and HIV; having heart complications; denied from heaven and hell-bound to hang with Hate (Sweet Daddy style).
What.

The.

Fuck!?!?!

cosmo20002
06-26-2013, 08:25 PM
Catching up:

1. Rico, rico, rico. Don't let these guys discourage you. Yeah, try #2 was still a little long, but I think that if you do it one more time you can nail it. This time, try to keep it under 200 words. Don't try to compete with Saul Good, he's a master. Just try to post something that everyone will read with one or two decent jokes in it. You might think about asking seclark to help you edit it.


pat...dude...c'mon.

crazycoffey
06-26-2013, 08:32 PM
And you still got voted the "King of the N00bs" that year by the vets.

Only because of the 10pm thread. With out it, smittybar would have probably won.

rico
06-26-2013, 08:58 PM
If it was truly shameful, I wouldn't have made any criticism at all. I would've watched the train derail, and put my head down until I got home.

Color me confused....so what is your definition of truly shameful?

KC native
06-26-2013, 09:01 PM
What's the point of a countdown when multiple people are doing the roast?

the countdown concept was abandoned like 500-700 maybe 1000 or like 5000 posts ago. pay attention numb nuts.

KC native
06-26-2013, 09:03 PM
FUCK U

TYLER THIGPEN IS THE WORST NFL PLAYUR EVAR. WORSER THAN TIM TEBOW

Dave Lane
06-26-2013, 09:15 PM
I gotta say mine was a bit tame and kinda lame but appreciated the effort. There are some funny truisms in there that where unknown but fit well.

Whoever did it good job, good effort.

KC native
06-26-2013, 09:30 PM
Rico is the energy guy. He's not the star of the show. He may lack the pure talent, but he gets by on his heart. Riles up the crowd for when the real talent comes in.

What I'm saying is...he's kind of my fluffer.

He's the Clay Guida of the roast thread

http://cdn2.sbnation.com/entry_photo_images/1357860/ufc_107_009_kenny_florian_clay_guida_cordova-514-1_fn_large_huge.jpg

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 09:36 PM
Where's the big crying pussy hootie is banned thread? I didn't see it.

rico
06-26-2013, 09:39 PM
He's the Clay Guida of the roast thread

http://cdn2.sbnation.com/entry_photo_images/1357860/ufc_107_009_kenny_florian_clay_guida_cordova-514-1_fn_large_huge.jpg

Johnsburg High School in Illinois. He was in my bracket at a large wrestling tournament way, way back in the day at the Silverdome.

Iowanian
06-26-2013, 09:47 PM
I am dissapoint.

This thread should read like the Red Wedding.

People should hear the Rains of Castamere just from reading this as a thread of this topic leaves so much room for barbarism. I keep popping in expecting to see skin shards hanging on the inside of my monitor and open the laptop to a puff of the stench of burning flesh.

This thread can now be legally married.

J Diddy
06-26-2013, 10:17 PM
Nothing. Phobia's on the rag.

Oh he's done plenty.

:Poke:

Phobia
06-26-2013, 10:28 PM
WTH? Hootie is banned again. ROFL

What did he do this time?

I spent an hour reviewing old discussions about Hootie from the mod forum. Then I decided he should have never been reinstated. Other mods agree. He might be back but he probably won't. Hopefully Pat, SaulG, and kstater are immensely disappointed in me.

Titty Meat
06-26-2013, 10:33 PM
Wow.

Mess with the bull you get the horns

patteeu
06-26-2013, 10:34 PM
I spent an hour reviewing old discussions about Hootie from the mod forum. Then I decided he should have never been reinstated. Other mods agree. He might be back but he probably won't. Hopefully Pat, SaulG, and kstater are immensely disappointed in me.

It's a bad look for you. It seems as if others have noticed.

cosmo20002
06-26-2013, 10:36 PM
That is some stone-cold badass mod-ing right there.

blaise
06-26-2013, 10:40 PM
I feel bad for whatever person hootie's complaining to right now.

Phobia
06-26-2013, 10:43 PM
It's a bad look for you. It seems as if others have noticed.

I definitely care what you think, patt. Please tell me more.

Frazod
06-26-2013, 10:47 PM
It's a bad look for you. It seems as if others have noticed.

I mainly don't understand why it took him so damned long.

L.A. Chieffan
06-26-2013, 10:52 PM
Hootie owns you all

Frazod
06-26-2013, 10:54 PM
Hootie owns you all

I'm here.

He's not.

The end.

Wrong as usual, dumbass.

L.A. Chieffan
06-26-2013, 10:56 PM
I'm here.

He's not.

The end.

Wrong as usual, dumbass.

Who are you?

Pasta Giant Meatball
06-26-2013, 11:04 PM
Top 5 thread of alltime

ThaVirus
06-26-2013, 11:08 PM
What did the Hootmeister do to get himself banned this time?

Phobia
06-26-2013, 11:11 PM
What did the Hootmeister do to get himself banned this time?

He challenged me to review all the old mod discussions earlier today. As I reviewed them, I realized that we were never under any obligation to allow him back in the first place. I kicked him to the curb and I don't really care. It was enlightening going through the old discussions. I have no idea why we agreed to look the other way when he registered a mult. That was a horrible idea. I am way, way too nice.

tk13
06-26-2013, 11:25 PM
I thought it'd gotten to the point where Hootie was spending as much time telling people he was the center of attention as actually being the center of attention. Don't get the appeal of that.

Pasta Giant Meatball
06-26-2013, 11:28 PM
Free Hootie.

rico don't change budROFL

J Diddy
06-27-2013, 03:15 AM
It's a bad look for you. It seems as if others have noticed.

You get em Atticus!!!

J Diddy
06-27-2013, 03:15 AM
Free Hootie.

rico don't change budROFL

He's just about as free as you can get.

Superturtle
06-27-2013, 05:08 AM
Phobia don't give a shit. Just does what he wants.

DaKCMan AP
06-27-2013, 06:13 AM
Phobia don't give a shit. Just does what he wants.

http://img.pandawhale.com/49197-Cartman-South-Park-gif--Whatev-R8fN.gif

KC Tattoo
06-27-2013, 06:50 AM
He challenged me to review all the old mod discussions earlier today. As I reviewed them, I realized that we were never under any obligation to allow him back in the first place. I kicked him to the curb and I don't really care. It was enlightening going through the old discussions. I have no idea why we agreed to look the other way when he registered a mult. That was a horrible idea. I am way, way too nice.



Thank you Phobia. Chiefs Planet is better for it & can be fun place to hang out again.

DaKCMan AP
06-27-2013, 06:51 AM
Thank you Phobia. Chiefs Planet is better for it & can be fun place to hang out again.

:rolleyes:

It never ceased being a fun place to hang out.