View Full Version : Gunther's Press Conference

Lurker Brett
09-12-2000, 01:55 PM
Q: Do you give (QB) Elvis Grbac more decision-making in terms of the offense ?
CUNNINGHAM: "I think the greatest thing about Elvis is he's growing his beard and he competes. He competed as hard as I've seen a quarterback compete.

A BEARD? Well thank God for that http://www.ChiefsPlanet.com/ubb/tongue.gif

Gunther (http://kcchiefs.com/latest/mainnews.asp?storyID=1676&cat=4&showLatest=yes)

09-12-2000, 01:58 PM
I wasn't quite sure if that was literal or figurative. And what the hell does it have to do with anything if it is literal. So he will look like Grizzly Adams... is that suppossed to make him more intimidating?

09-12-2000, 01:59 PM
What he says --

Q: What has happened to your kicking game ?

CUNNINGHAM: "I used disappointing and frustrating. I would say that would be frustrating and not disappointing. I think they're both fine kickers.

What he means --

there's nothing else out there folks. Believe me, we've looked

09-12-2000, 02:03 PM
Come on Gun, if you think Grbac is growing some nads...let him prove it and really open things up...

"I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together!"

09-12-2000, 02:07 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Helvetica, verdana, ariel">quote:</font><HR> I know what I want and I'm having to be patient and it's difficult for me at times not to be able to throw the ball out of four wides or three wides with a tight end. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Grbac - wants a more open O.
Gun - says here he wants a more open O.

What is it? Is Raye the pounder? Is gun changing his story? Why the run, run, run?

09-12-2000, 02:15 PM
Dan Fouts here we come!!!!!

Now if Don Coryell could be coaxed out of retirement the formula for a potent offense would be complete.

Gonzalez would be Winslow.

Alexander/Morris/Lockett are Joiner/Jefferson and Chandler.

Richardson could emulate Muncie if he puts on the specs.

I can see it now!!!!!

09-12-2000, 02:20 PM
Based on the way that he avoided answering just about every single question that was asked, I am guessing that he is preparing for a career in politics after he gets fired this year...

09-12-2000, 02:21 PM
He did say he felt like the president last week.

09-12-2000, 02:25 PM
Well, Gunther better focus on gathering votes in the Southeast, Northwest, and Mideast because he won't be receiving too many votes from the Midwestern States.

09-12-2000, 02:25 PM
I've seen old ladies with beards...

Maybe he meant Elvis got his first pubes.

Kids, pubes are natural part of...never mind.

This is my signature!! There are many like it but this one is mine!!

09-12-2000, 02:34 PM
I laugh harder every time I read that quote! He names his 2 favorite things about Grbac, and one of those things is, "He's growing his beard"?! Too funny!

Stills: "Hey coach! What about me? I'm growing mutton chops!"

Gun: "Forget it, Gary. When you decide to go with the full beard, then we'll talk. Get back to the bench!"

This is my signature!! There are many like it but this one is mine!!

09-12-2000, 02:36 PM

Why did he say that he felt like the President? Cause he sucks at his job? or did he just come back from a weekly penicillin injection?

09-12-2000, 02:38 PM
LOL...I'm with Clint on this one, I can't stop laughing about Gun's comments. Elvis is growing a beard and he competes. First off, what does that have to do with the question of giving him more decision-making? And second off, what does facial hair have to do with anything?? Or does this go back to Elvis' "maturing" and "developing"?

[This message has been edited by Smltheppl (edited 09-12-2000).]

09-12-2000, 02:45 PM
LMAO@#10!!! http://www.ChiefsPlanet.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

Larry Reed
09-12-2000, 02:55 PM
Have you read this article?

I found it interesting, especially the part where he quotes Gun's incoherent "stream-of-consciousness" babbles from his last press conference. I'm seriously worried about this guy's mental and physical health... ...and I don't find it surprising that his observations about Grbac are focused on facial hair.

Kurt Surber
09-12-2000, 02:57 PM
That was a pathetic answer!

09-12-2000, 03:17 PM
Lol, these are all very funny comments, (especially the Stills dialogue) but I'm SURE Gun meant that Grbac is maturing. I just cannot see anyone caring what the QB looks like, so he must have meant that Grbac is growing up.

09-12-2000, 08:31 PM
thank you yosef.....i was begining to become very worried about the inteligence of the posters here......

he meant it figuratively.......the guy is becoming more experienced.....getting better....imo....he has gotten better....and i hope they do open it up.....i think a lot of us will be suprised at how good he really is

09-12-2000, 08:49 PM
You guys keep slinging smack...it's only the third game...Karma is going to bite you in the *** ...keep setting yourselves up...<P>

09-12-2000, 10:31 PM
Karma? Try these Gunther-bites from his press conference today:

- "I watched the Jets and Patriots game (on MNF) too, and obviously closed my eyes before it was over."
- "One thing that hasn't shown up on our football team both on the staff and the players is frustration."
- "I think it's only a matter of time before we put the team on the field that we want and our fans can be proud of."
- "I feel confident with (Jimmy Raye) calling the plays."
- "I'm probably having more fun than I've had since I've been a head coach."
- "We're plus four in give-away/take aways, which is always a positive here in Kansas City."
- "It's great. He's looking for the ball more and more every week." - about Gonzales
- "If I used the word 'frustration,' I'd be wrong."

Need any more proof we're in trouble?<BR>

09-12-2000, 10:50 PM
More soundbites from today's radio programs, courtesty Sportswaves.com

- "I hate people who aren't going to get hit who want to call plays." Otis Taylor, saying Elvis should have the authority to call the plays, 980 AM

- "I think (Jimmy Raye's) always ready and has an answer for every situation." Gunther Cunningham, Metro Sports

- "I've never seen anybody run a 15-yard hook pattern and come back to the ball. (The Chiefs) run a lot of crossing (pass patterns) and outs but nothing over the middle...that's where the honey is." Otis Taylor, 980 AM

- We have too many good players to be playing the way we are and losing." Otis Taylor, 980 AM

- "What Gunther Cunningham needs to do, Gunther, if you're listening, if you watch your back and protect your back, you'll be alright. Just watch your back because somebody's trying to stab you." Otis Taylor, 980 AM

- "We're having a tough time but I think we can come out of a tough time. If anybody thinks football's not important in this town then uh, excuse me Tony, that it's turning into a baseball town. I don't know about that." Gunther Cunningham, Channel 41

I find Otis Taylor's comments very interesting!<BR>

09-13-2000, 06:30 AM
Q: Do you expect a win this Sunday against San Diego?

A: I expect a win every day. Saturday is the day before Sunday, and a lot of people are off work and go shopping and things. The mall isn't far from Arrowhead, and there will be a lot of traffic.

Q: But what about the game against San Diego Sunday?

A: I've seen the schedule for this season and we play San Diego twice. They're in our division, as are Denver and some other teams. We play 16 games this season, and I hope to be here for all of them.

Q: The game against San Diego is next Sunday. Do you expect to rebound after that painful loss to the titans?

A: I don't think I've referred to any loss as painful. I have a flexible sigmoidoscopy every other year now, and that's painful. Physicians recommend that all males over the age of 50 have those every other year and I tend to follow my physicians advice.

09-13-2000, 06:34 AM
Reading a quote is often misleading. I would like to hear the press conference before I make a decision about what he ment by the comment. But that will have to wait until tonight because I can't get real player to work through the firewall here at work.


09-13-2000, 06:53 AM
Q: The loss was painful for the fans.

A: I've got ceiling fans in every room of my house. I've got fans in my office. Did you know your car has a fan just behind the radiator? Life is full of fans, and I don't think any of them are animate, and therefore cannot feel "pain."

Q: Getting back to the San Diego game this Sunday.

A: How on earth can I get back to something that hasn't happened? It's in the future, like that movie with Michael J. Fox. Now that was a funny movie that still had an interesting plot.

Q: Let me re-phrase the question. Do you expect a win this Sunday against San Diego?

A: I've already answered that question. Next question.

Q: Are you an alien? I'm sorry...forget I said that. Your offense only scored one touchdown last week against the Titans. What changes are you making to address that problem?

A: I'd like to reply to your initial question if I may. I am a naturalized citizen of the United States.

Q: Fair enough. What about the offense?

A: The players charged with offenses are no longer with this team. We saw a need, and we addressed it before the regular season started. We're proactive here in Kansas City, and I'm getting tired of all the criticism about this team's character. This team's character is KC Wolf, and he'll be on the field and ready this Sunday at Arrowhead. He'll probably have a 4-wheeler and a dummy dressed like a Charger.

[This message has been edited by Robert_Dole (edited 09-13-2000).]

09-13-2000, 07:08 AM

I doubt that Gun really meant a "beard", but what makes you think Gun is getting better? There's no evidence of it on the field. let me guess...he's been intentionally holding back the true genius that is "Gunther Cunningham", right?

If anyone's intelligence on this BB should be questioned, it's yours.

This is my signature!! There are many like it but this one is mine!!

09-13-2000, 07:14 AM
Q: Coach Cunningham, my question is about the problem your offensive unit is having scoring.

A: I've been married for 30 years. I'm not worried about my unit, or scoring.

Q: Good googly moogly, man! I'm asking what you are doing to ensure your team scores more points this coming Sunday!

A: "Good googly moogly" reminds me of that Snickers commercial. Have you seen that? There's this guy painting the endzone at Arrowhead where we play our home games and he misspells "Chiefs" and it says "Chefs." That was funny as hel1. They call us the "Chefs" on ESPN now, you know.

Q: [deep breathing] Coach Cunningham. Your team has lost the first 2 games this season. Many people are blaming it on the coaching staff. How do you respond?

A: I respond a lot of different ways depending on the situation. For instance, when I'm sitting in my office at 4 a.m. each day, I'm looking at 3 computers. If my computer that has the email account says, "You've got mail!" I typically respond with a left mouse click. Sometimes I wait awhile to respond, and sometimes it's immediate. I'm an emotional guy and that's to be expected.

09-13-2000, 07:51 AM
Holy Crap Dole, that was hilarious!!! You forgot to mention the part about Raye and him having thier bubble baths together after he checks his email.

09-13-2000, 07:58 AM
Bob Dole will post the rest of his phone interview with Gunther Cunningham as time allows. Bob Dole did, however, just speak to Gun regarding your bubble bath reference.

Q: Rumors are that you and Jimmy Raye share bubble baths. Is this true?

A: Jimmy takes baths. I take baths. This is not the Middle Ages and everyone in this organization has excellent personal grooming habits. In the Middle Ages, they did not have running water and were tough. This football team is tough and we'd be able to walk all over those Middle Age's silly kaniggets, even if we do smell particularly floral once in awhile. I emphasize toughness.

09-13-2000, 08:08 AM
Bob Dole, that is HILARIOUS!!! I had to get up from my desk and get something to drink because I was laughing so hard.


my side hurts.

09-13-2000, 08:10 AM
RE: post # 20

Otis For Coach (or even OC)

[This message has been edited by scooter (edited 09-13-2000).]

09-13-2000, 08:55 AM
Dole you just made everyone look at me. I couldn't keep from lauging aloud and disturbing them. I especially liked the one about the fans! Now I see what you guys meant when you referred to Gun's stream-of-consciousness mumblings...

09-13-2000, 09:09 AM
Bob Dole is pleased that folks are finding the interview humorous. It's helping Bob Dole deal with the painful reality that is the Chief's coaching staff.

09-13-2000, 09:14 AM
Bob, I strung all of them together and sent them out via email. Everyone is dying.

09-13-2000, 09:26 AM
Bob, that was great! Way to lighten up a dismal situation! Where did you get the inspiration?


09-13-2000, 11:03 AM
Bob Dole isn't sure where that came from... Just sitting around drinking coffee, waiting for the d@mned gas company to get here so Bob Dole didn't have to take any more cold showers.

(If that's not an opening, Bob Dole is as stupid as JR.)

09-13-2000, 11:11 AM
TOO FUNNY! I can't wait for Bob Dole to interview Jimmy Raye!!

09-13-2000, 05:35 PM
Bob Dole doesn't recall ever seeing or hearing an interview with JR, which would make it hard to emulate.

At this point, Bob Dole's version would sound like an episode of Beavis and Butthead minus Beavis...

(Bob Dole is ready to take on Mike Judge one-on-one.)

Larry Reed
09-14-2000, 03:04 PM
Bob, that stuff is just too true to be funny! http://www.ChiefsPlanet.com/ubb/wink.gif

Still worried for Gun's health...

09-14-2000, 03:20 PM
Unbelievable interview. Keep up the good work.

He cannot ravish, he can only woo

09-15-2000, 09:45 AM
This just in. He wasn't speaking figuratively. He really thinks Elvis' ability to sprout facial hair is one of his greatest assets.

09-15-2000, 10:03 AM
Bob Dole you know how to fix the cold shower thing<BR>