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View Full Version : The REAL Aircraft #10, Report here.


Rain Man
01-21-2004, 09:09 AM
Don't let JOhn's crew bother you. They're the next airplane over.

I just wanted to let you know that I (randomly) handpicked you guys, because I think that as a team we're (randomly) the best da** crew in the sky. We're going to kick some Nazi butt over there.

You can suggest names for the aircraft if you'd like. I put a poll up that wasn't getting much action, so I made an executive ego decision to call the plane Rain of Terror, with the nose art depicted in the first post. Let me know what you think.

Aircraft #10

Pilot Rain Man
Copilot tk13
Bombardier ChiTown
Navigator whoman69
Engineer Pitt Gorilla
Radio Op. KC Jones
Tail Gunner Duck Dog
Ball Turret Gunner DrNick
Right Waist Gunner Cormac
Left Waist Gunner The Rick

Rain Man
01-21-2004, 09:35 AM
How's this for our nose art? Sophisticated yet playful. Beautiful but dangerous. Naked but...well, naked is enough there.

http://www.airpowermuseum.org/pix/ambcmz35.jpg

Rain Man
01-21-2004, 09:45 AM
Ah. We had a suggestion in the poll for "Gunther's Thunder," which I like, too. Anyone on the crew want to vote one way or the other?

JOhn
01-21-2004, 10:13 AM
Yea well you probably just switched the #'s to make me look bad. :grr:

ChiTown
01-21-2004, 10:16 AM
How's this for our nose art? Sophisticated yet playful. Beautiful but dangerous. Naked but...well, naked is enough there.

http://www.airpowermuseum.org/pix/ambcmz35.jpg

Kinda looks like the new and improved Anna Nicole Smith ;)

Me likey.

Gunthers Thunder is fine. As long as we don't have the word "spinner" included, I'm good to go :)

Rain Man
01-21-2004, 12:25 PM
I hate it when the rest of the crew goes to the pub without me.

KCWolfman
01-21-2004, 12:27 PM
Kinda looks like the new and improved Anna Nicole Smith ;)




Yeah, if she were launched from a ceiling fan at you.

morphius
01-21-2004, 01:16 PM
Yea well you probably just switched the #'s to make me look bad. :grr:
When was the last time a person had to try to make you look bad, seriously?

Morphius
Eviiiiil

tk13
01-21-2004, 03:05 PM
We should call ourselves "Howard the Dean" and put a Duck on the nose and have a warcry of YAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRH!

Rain Man
01-21-2004, 03:23 PM
You've been at the pub again, haven't you? HAVEN'T YOU?

tk13
01-21-2004, 06:01 PM
You've been at the pub again, haven't you? HAVEN'T YOU?
No sir captain sir. I was just playing with a rubix cube. Forgive me.

whoman69
01-21-2004, 08:17 PM
Ah. We had a suggestion in the poll for "Gunther's Thunder," which I like, too. Anyone on the crew want to vote one way or the other?
Since I came up with that one, I am partial to it. I just can't wait to hit those Nazi bastards hiding in Oakland. Gotta take out the entire town in my opinion. One bad seed left unattended...

Rain Man
01-21-2004, 08:24 PM
You just steer the way there. It's not like I can tell the difference between Oakland and Stuttgart from up there.

Rain Man
01-25-2004, 02:01 AM
Betty Lou Hobnobski
16 Clear Creek Lane
Rolla, MO

My dearest Betty,

I miss you and I think about you every day. It's hard to believe that I'm engaged to my high school sweetheart.

We just finished our first mission, and it's strange to be the pilot of one of these big ships. If only the guys in algebra class could see me now! I'm proud to say that we had the highest bombing rating in our squadron - 60 percent! - though that was more the bombardier's work than mine. I just fly the thing. We saw 8 enemy airplanes on our way in, but there's only seven of them now, thanks to our tail gunner.

I should describe our crew to you, or at least what little I know of them so far.

tk13 is my copilot, so he sits next to me in the cockpit. He wears the Number 13 a lot, which I don't like, and he likes to play with the dials while I'm flying. I'm still trying to figure him out.

My bombardier is from Chicago, so we call him Chitown. He sits down in the nose of the plane with the navigator, and he's really good. The best in the squadron, according to the stats, even if he does have to be dragged out of the pubs at night.

Our navigator is a great guy. When I first saw his name, whoman69, I thought maybe he was one of those woman flyers. He's not, though, and that's good. I heard that a copilot in another plane killed his pilot over a girl.

Our engineer is Pitt Gorilla. I was kind of disappointed when I met him because I thought he would be one of those trained military gorillas, but he's not, even though he's kind of hairy. He is from Pittsburgh, though, even if it's not the big Pittsburgh.

KC Jones is our radio operator. He talks sometimes about his old-style house back home, and then he tries to call his wife on the radio. He's never reached her, but we think that once he managed to reach Hermann Goering.

Our tail gunner is Duck Dog. He says he got the nickname when someone threw a dog at him once right as he bent over to tie his shoe. He's a crack shot, and killed a Messerschmidt on our first mission!

Our ball turret gunner is named Dr. Nick. I don't think he's a real doctor, but he keeps trying to convince the women in the pub that he is, so we all try to help him out with that.

Our right waist gunner is cormac. He's from another country, so we like to pretend we can't understand him sometimes even though his English is flawless. We just keep saying, "Huh? Huh?" and it's kind of funny.

Our left waist gunner is The Rick. Not just any Rick, THE Rick. You've probably heard of him.

Anyway, it's a great crew, and we've got one mission down and 24 to go. Wish us luck, and I look forward to walking down the aisle with you when I get back home!

1/LT Kevin

Rain Man
01-25-2004, 02:05 AM
Marlene Friar
23 West Point Circle
Fort Benning, GA

My dearest Marlene,

I miss you and I think about you every day. It's hard to believe that I'm engaged to the first woman I laid eyes on at basic training.

We just finished our first mission, and it's strange to be the pilot of one of these big ships. If only the guys in algebra class could see me now! I'm proud to say that we had the highest bombing rating in our squadron - 60 percent! - though that was more the bombardier's work than mine. I just fly the thing. We saw 8 enemy airplanes on our way in, but there's only seven of them now, thanks to our tail gunner.

I should describe our crew to you, or at least what little I know of them so far.

tk13 is my copilot, so he sits next to me in the cockpit. He wears the Number 13 a lot, which I don't like, and he likes to play with the dials while I'm flying. I'm still trying to figure him out.

My bombardier is from Chicago, so we call him Chitown. He sits down in the nose of the plane with the navigator, and he's really good. The best in the squadron, according to the stats, even if he does have to be dragged out of the pubs at night.

Our navigator is a great guy. When I first saw his name, whoman69, I thought maybe he was one of those woman flyers. He's not, though, and that's good. I heard that a copilot in another plane killed his pilot over a girl.

Our engineer is Pitt Gorilla. I was kind of disappointed when I met him because I thought he would be one of those trained military gorillas, but he's not, even though he's kind of hairy. He is from Pittsburgh, though, even if it's not the big Pittsburgh.

KC Jones is our radio operator. He talks sometimes about his old-style house back home, and then he tries to call his wife on the radio. He's never reached her, but we think that once he managed to reach Hermann Goering.

Our tail gunner is Duck Dog. He says he got the nickname when someone threw a dog at him once right as he bent over to tie his shoe. He's a crack shot, and killed a Messerschmidt on our first mission!

Our ball turret gunner is named Dr. Nick. I don't think he's a real doctor, but he keeps trying to convince the women in the pub that he is, so we all try to help him out with that.

Our right waist gunner is cormac. He's from another country, so we like to pretend we can't understand him sometimes even though his English is flawless. We just keep saying, "Huh? Huh?" and it's kind of funny.

Our left waist gunner is The Rick. Not just any Rick, THE Rick. You've probably heard of him.

Anyway, it's a great crew, and we've got one mission down and 24 to go. Wish us luck, and I look forward to walking down the aisle with you when I get back home!

1/LT Kevin

Rain Man
01-25-2004, 02:07 AM
Jeannie Shapiro
9292 Starfish Way
Sarasota, FL

My dearest Jeannie,

I miss you and I think about you every day. It's hard to believe that I'm engaged to you now. I still remember the first time we met at that ice cream shop as I was finishing flight school.

We just finished our first mission, and it's strange to be the pilot of one of these big ships. If only the guys in algebra class could see me now! I'm proud to say that we had the highest bombing rating in our squadron - 60 percent! - though that was more the bombardier's work than mine. I just fly the thing. We saw 8 enemy airplanes on our way in, but there's only seven of them now, thanks to our tail gunner.

I should describe our crew to you, or at least what little I know of them so far.

tk13 is my copilot, so he sits next to me in the cockpit. He wears the Number 13 a lot, which I don't like, and he likes to play with the dials while I'm flying. I'm still trying to figure him out.

My bombardier is from Chicago, so we call him Chitown. He sits down in the nose of the plane with the navigator, and he's really good. The best in the squadron, according to the stats, even if he does have to be dragged out of the pubs at night.

Our navigator is a great guy. When I first saw his name, whoman69, I thought maybe he was one of those woman flyers. He's not, though, and that's good. I heard that a copilot in another plane killed his pilot over a girl.

Our engineer is Pitt Gorilla. I was kind of disappointed when I met him because I thought he would be one of those trained military gorillas, but he's not, even though he's kind of hairy. He is from Pittsburgh, though, even if it's not the big Pittsburgh.

KC Jones is our radio operator. He talks sometimes about his old-style house back home, and then he tries to call his wife on the radio. He's never reached her, but we think that once he managed to reach Hermann Goering.

Our tail gunner is Duck Dog. He says he got the nickname when someone threw a dog at him once right as he bent over to tie his shoe. He's a crack shot, and killed a Messerschmidt on our first mission!

Our ball turret gunner is named Dr. Nick. I don't think he's a real doctor, but he keeps trying to convince the women in the pub that he is, so we all try to help him out with that.

Our right waist gunner is cormac. He's from another country, so we like to pretend we can't understand him sometimes even though his English is flawless. We just keep saying, "Huh? Huh?" and it's kind of funny.

Our left waist gunner is The Rick. Not just any Rick, THE Rick. You've probably heard of him.

Anyway, it's a great crew, and we've got one mission down and 24 to go. Wish us luck, and I look forward to walking down the aisle with you when I get back home!

1/LT Kevin

Rain Man
01-25-2004, 02:09 AM
Lucy Coopersmith
3128 Thames Street
Cambridge, England

My dearest Lucy,

I miss you and I think about you every day. It's hard to believe that I'm engaged to a woman whom I've only known for two weeks!

We just finished our first mission, and it's strange to be the pilot of one of these big ships. If only the guys in algebra class could see me now! I'm proud to say that we had the highest bombing rating in our squadron - 60 percent! - though that was more the bombardier's work than mine. I just fly the thing. We saw 8 enemy airplanes on our way in, but there's only seven of them now, thanks to our tail gunner.

I should describe our crew to you, or at least what little I know of them so far.

tk13 is my copilot, so he sits next to me in the cockpit. He wears the Number 13 a lot, which I don't like, and he likes to play with the dials while I'm flying. I'm still trying to figure him out.

My bombardier is from Chicago, so we call him Chitown. He sits down in the nose of the plane with the navigator, and he's really good. The best in the squadron, according to the stats, even if he does have to be dragged out of the pubs at night.

Our navigator is a great guy. When I first saw his name, whoman69, I thought maybe he was one of those woman flyers. He's not, though, and that's good. I heard that a copilot in another plane killed his pilot over a girl.

Our engineer is Pitt Gorilla. I was kind of disappointed when I met him because I thought he would be one of those trained military gorillas, but he's not, even though he's kind of hairy. He is from Pittsburgh, though, even if it's not the big Pittsburgh.

KC Jones is our radio operator. He talks sometimes about his old-style house back home, and then he tries to call his wife on the radio. He's never reached her, but we think that once he managed to reach Hermann Goering.

Our tail gunner is Duck Dog. He says he got the nickname when someone threw a dog at him once right as he bent over to tie his shoe. He's a crack shot, and killed a Messerschmidt on our first mission!

Our ball turret gunner is named Dr. Nick. I don't think he's a real doctor, but he keeps trying to convince the women in the pub that he is, so we all try to help him out with that.

Our right waist gunner is cormac. He's from another country, so we like to pretend we can't understand him sometimes even though his English is flawless. We just keep saying, "Huh? Huh?" and it's kind of funny.

Our left waist gunner is The Rick. Not just any Rick, THE Rick. You've probably heard of him.

Anyway, it's a great crew, and we've got one mission down and 24 to go. Wish us luck, and I look forward to walking down the aisle with you when I get a good long leave!

1/LT Kevin

tk13
01-25-2004, 03:00 AM
ROFL Very slick there captain... think you could save some action for the co-pilot here. I get to do so much work but get no glory... alas the co-pilot's life is never easy.

Talisman
01-25-2004, 09:30 AM
ROFL

whoman69
01-25-2004, 11:10 AM
You just steer the way there. It's not like I can tell the difference between Oakland and Stuttgart from up there.
Well, for the war effort I did steer our plane to Germany. I found out Oakland is out of range from England. But if we should survive the European war and take a crack at the Japs, the pull towards Oakland would be too strong. Already the threat of action has scared away any possible enemy commanders. They are staying away from that suicide mission. The latest poop reports they may have to sign a certain traitor DC from our side, even though it was found he was still working for the Donkey faction when he was supposed to be on our side. But what can you do if noone else will take the job?

tk13
01-29-2004, 12:24 AM
B17 #10 – Gunther’s Thunder

Pilot Rain Man (1)
Copilot tk13 (1)
Bombardier ChiTown (1)
Navigator whoman69 (1)
Engineer Pitt Gorilla (1)
Radio Op. KC Jones (1)
Tail Gunner Duck Dog (1)
Ball Turret Gunner DrNick (1)
Right Waist Gunner Cormac (1)
Left Waist Gunner The Rick (1)

Target: the fighter base at St. Omer
Mid-formation horizontally, low vertically (high vulnerability)


Zone 1 Out: Britain

No enemy

Zone 2 Out: English Channel (Entering Target Zone)

4 Me109s attack – 1 Me109 driven away by fighters

Chitown fires, misses
Whoman69 fires, misses
Pitt Gorilla fires, misses
Duck Dog fires, misses
Cormac fires, misses

3 Mes miss, break off attack

Entering Bomb Zone
Good Weather
Heavy Flak – 8 hits
-waist – Cormac’s oxygen hit, moves to portable oxygen
-tail – Duck Dog’s oxygen hit, moves to portable oxygen
-tail – port tailplane root damaged
-superficial damage to tail
-starboard wing root damaged
-pilot compartment – Pitt Gorilla killed by hit to face
-tail – tail wheel damaged – we’re going to drag the tail when we land.
-nose – whoman69 sustains light wound to right hip

Bombs run off target due to flak – 0% score

Zone 2: English Channel (Leaving Target Zone)

Cormac moves to the top turret, takes over top turret guns

2 Me109s attack – 1 driven away by fighters

Cormac fires, misses
Whoman69 fires, misses

Me misses, breaks off attack

5 Me109s attack – 2 are driven away by fighters

Duck Dog fires, misses
KC Jones fires, misses
The Rick fires, misses
Cormac fires, misses

2 Mes miss, break off attack

Me scores 4 hits in strafe from 6 o’clock high

-superficial damage to tail
-starboard wing root hit again, severely damaged. No more evasive actions
-bomb bay – control cables damaged (not severed)
-superficial damage to nose

Me circles, attacks again

Duck Dog fires, misses
Chitown fires, misses

Me misses, breaks off attack

Zone 1: England

Good weather
Good landing despite some big chunks out of the tail and a bad starboard wing. The tailwheel collapses upon landing and there are some fancy sparks, but Gunther’s Thunder is repairable.

Aftereffects

B-17 is repaired for next mission.

Eligible for next mission

Pilot Rain Man (1)
Copilot tk13 (1)
Bombardier ChiTown (1)
Navigator whoman69 (1)
Engineer KC Jones (1), promoted
Radio Op. Duck Dog (1) , promoted
Tail Gunner DrNick (1) , promoted
Ball Turret Gunner Cormac (1) , promoted
Right Waist Gunner The Rick (1) , promoted
Left Waist Gunner XXX

Hey, we walked away from it. Well, except for Pitt Gorilla. RIP, engineer.

Alrighty pilot let's get our act together next time. No more fantasizing about your women in apricot bikinis next time..

Rain Man
01-29-2004, 02:04 AM
Hey, we walked away from it, didn't we? I did my job. Why weren't you keeping an eye on Pitt Gorilla? It was your day to watch him.

tk13
01-29-2004, 02:59 AM
Hey, we walked away from it, didn't we? I did my job. Why weren't you keeping an eye on Pitt Gorilla? It was your day to watch him.
Oh, I'm sorry, I was busy trying to make sure the PLANE DIDN'T EXPLODE!

Rain Man
01-29-2004, 10:11 AM
I thought the sparks were kind of pretty.

Hydrae
01-29-2004, 07:17 PM
Hey guys! Just in fwom Boston. How soon until we get to fly this biwd? :thumb:
















Hard to do an accent on the Internet...

Rain Man
01-29-2004, 07:36 PM
Welcome aboard! Just set your stuff over in that bunk over there, the one with the picture of Pitt Gorilla's girlfriend on the wall.

Let me give you a tour of our hut. There's the heater, there's the bunks, and that thing over there? It's our light bulb.

We leave at dawn. Any questions?

whoman69
01-29-2004, 07:49 PM
Hey guys! Just in fwom Boston. How soon until we get to fly this biwd? :thumb:
Hard to do an accent on the Internet...
Oh my god, Mr Magoo is going to be one of our gunners.

whoman69
01-29-2004, 07:51 PM
Hey, we walked away from it, didn't we? I did my job. Why weren't you keeping an eye on Pitt Gorilla? It was your day to watch him.
Actually since he sits by me, I guess it was my job. But I was too busy shooting myself in the hip.

Rain Man
01-29-2004, 08:33 PM
I'm not going to let you pick first when we go through his foot locker.

whoman69
01-29-2004, 09:08 PM
I'm not going to let you pick first when we go through his foot locker.
Two guys at work were fired this month. I can rifle thru their desks.

Besides all that in there was a collection of Casper the Friendly Ghost comics.

Hydrae
01-31-2004, 08:20 AM
Oh my god, Mr Magoo is going to be one of our gunners.


**OOC**Glad someone finally noticed enough to comment. I started as a navigator and thought that Mr. Magoo was a nice touchy.

**Back in character**Why thanks for the welcome guys! Wow, that Pitt guy had a nice looking woman. Do I dare ask what happened to him?

Hey Rainman, are you sure that lightbulb is regulation? They sure didn't say anything to me about red lights during my training. :shrug:

Rain Man
02-01-2004, 03:16 PM
Betty Lou Hobnobski
16 Clear Creek Lane
Rolla, MO

My dearest Betty,

I think of you often, and can't wait until our wedding day after the war is over.

I got a three day pass this weekend, not long enough to come back and see you, but I will be going to Cambridge. There are lots of interesting things to do there, but I also plan to spend a lot of time just enjoying the nice soft bed in the hotel room.

I've completed three missions now, without a scratch. I can't say the same for my crew, though. We came through our first mission (to Abbeville) with just a couple of holes in the plane, though one bullet did come through the pilot compartment right next to me.

The second mission was tougher. We lost our engineer to flak while we were over the target zone in St. Omer, and the plane took a lot of damage. The tailwheel was messed up and collapsed when we landed, so the ground crew had to work hard to get us ready for our next mission.

That mission was the worst, and I sincerely wonder if it could get any worse. Our plane, Gunther's Thunder, was hit about two dozen times on our mission to Meaulte. Out of a ten-man crew, our navigator was killed, our left waist gunner (new to the crew) was injured badly enough that he was sent home, and our bombardier, engineer (just promoted from radio op), and even my copilot were injured. The landing gear didn't work right, so we made a full belly landing, which more or less destroyed the plane.

We're not complaining, though. Two of the 20 planes we came over with have been shot down, and we don't know if anyone survived either one.

Anyway, that's enough about the war. Give my regards to your folks and everyone else back home.

1/LT Kevin

Rain Man
02-01-2004, 03:19 PM
Marlene Friar
23 West Point Circle
Fort Benning, GA

My dearest Marlene,

I think of you often, and can't wait until our wedding day after the war is over.

I got a three day pass this weekend, not long enough to come back and see you, but I will be going to Cambridge. There are lots of interesting things to do there, but I also plan to spend a lot of time just enjoying the nice soft bed in the hotel room.

I've completed three missions now, without a scratch. I can't say the same for my crew, though. We came through our first mission (to Abbeville) with just a couple of holes in the plane, though one bullet did come through the pilot compartment right next to me.

The second mission was tougher. We lost our engineer to flak while we were over the target zone in St. Omer, and the plane took a lot of damage. The tailwheel was messed up and collapsed when we landed, so the ground crew had to work hard to get us ready for our next mission.

That mission was the worst, and I sincerely wonder if it could get any worse. Our plane, Gunther's Thunder, was hit about two dozen times on our mission to Meaulte. Out of a ten-man crew, our navigator was killed, our left waist gunner (new to the crew) was injured badly enough that he was sent home, and our bombardier, engineer (just promoted from radio op), and even my copilot were injured. The landing gear didn't work right, so we made a full belly landing, which more or less destroyed the plane.

We're not complaining, though. Two of the 20 planes we came over with have been shot down, and we don't know if anyone survived either one.

Anyway, that's enough about the war. Give my regards to your folks and everyone else back home.

1/LT Kevin

Rain Man
02-01-2004, 03:20 PM
Jeannie Shapiro
9292 Starfish Way
Sarasota, FL

My dearest Jeannie,

I think of you often, and can't wait until our wedding day after the war is over.

I got a three day pass this weekend, not long enough to come back and see you, but I will be going to Cambridge. There are lots of interesting things to do there, but I also plan to spend a lot of time just enjoying the nice soft bed in the hotel room.

I've completed three missions now, without a scratch. I can't say the same for my crew, though. We came through our first mission (to Abbeville) with just a couple of holes in the plane, though one bullet did come through the pilot compartment right next to me.

The second mission was tougher. We lost our engineer to flak while we were over the target zone in St. Omer, and the plane took a lot of damage. The tailwheel was messed up and collapsed when we landed, so the ground crew had to work hard to get us ready for our next mission.

That mission was the worst, and I sincerely wonder if it could get any worse. Our plane, Gunther's Thunder, was hit about two dozen times on our mission to Meaulte. Out of a ten-man crew, our navigator was killed, our left waist gunner (new to the crew) was injured badly enough that he was sent home, and our bombardier, engineer (just promoted from radio op), and even my copilot were injured. The landing gear didn't work right, so we made a full belly landing, which more or less destroyed the plane.

We're not complaining, though. Two of the 20 planes we came over with have been shot down, and we don't know if anyone survived either one.

Anyway, that's enough about the war. Give my regards to your folks and everyone else back home.

1/LT Kevin

Rain Man
02-01-2004, 03:22 PM
Lucy Coopersmith
3128 Thames Street
Cambridge, England

My dearest Lucy,

I think of you often, and can't wait until our wedding day after the war is over.

I got a three day pass this weekend, so I'm coming to see you! I'm sure there are lots of interesting things to do in Cambridge, but I plan to spend a lot of time just enjoying the nice soft bed in the hotel room, if you know what I mean.

I've completed three missions now, without a scratch. I can't say the same for my crew, though. We came through our first mission (to Abbeville) with just a couple of holes in the plane, though one bullet did come through the pilot compartment right next to me.

The second mission was tougher. We lost our engineer to flak while we were over the target zone in St. Omer, and the plane took a lot of damage. The tailwheel was messed up and collapsed when we landed, so the ground crew had to work hard to get us ready for our next mission.

That mission was the worst, and I sincerely wonder if it could get any worse. Our plane, Gunther's Thunder, was hit about two dozen times on our mission to Meaulte. Out of a ten-man crew, our navigator was killed, our left waist gunner (new to the crew) was injured badly enough that he was sent home, and our bombardier, engineer (just promoted from radio op), and even my copilot were injured. The landing gear didn't work right, so we made a full belly landing, which more or less destroyed the plane.

We're not complaining, though. Two of the 20 planes we came over with have been shot down, and we don't know if anyone survived either one.

Anyway, that's enough about the war. Give my regards to your folks and everyone else back home.

1/LT Kevin

Zebedee DuBois
02-01-2004, 04:22 PM
ROFL

You Cad!!!!

Misplaced_Chiefs_Fan
02-01-2004, 04:31 PM
Course, when those ladies get the letters, there are a lot of blacked out areas on them.

Wartime censors, you know. Can't have people talking about actual locations and actual damage.

So it probably reads a lot like:
That mission was the worst, and I sincerely wonder if it could get any worse. Our plane, *************, was ******************* on our mission to *******. Out of a ************, our *****************, our ***************** was sent home, and our ********************************* were *********. The ************** didn't work right, so we made a ******************, which more or less ************************.

I think you get the picture.

Hydrae
02-01-2004, 09:52 PM
Better be sure to send the right letter to the right girl! I would hate to see what would happen if Betty got the letter intended for Lucy. Somehow, I do not think Betty would be understanding of what your plans are for those soft beds in Cambridge.

Zebedee DuBois
02-01-2004, 09:58 PM
The beds aren't any softer in Cambridge. But Rain Man might have someone lined up to help cushion the mattress. (the dog)

whoman69
02-02-2004, 11:59 AM
Pushing up daisies.

Rain Man
02-02-2004, 02:52 PM
Hey, I'll come and put flowers on your grave every Memorial Day, whoman. You can count on it.

Talisman
02-02-2004, 03:33 PM
Hey, I'll come and put flowers on your grave every Memorial Day, whoman. You can count on it.
You realize whoman's a dude, right?

Rain Man
02-02-2004, 04:39 PM
You realize whoman's a dude, right?

What, you want me to put a bag of potato chips on his grave? Flowers are unisex.

Talisman
02-02-2004, 05:03 PM
What, you want me to put a bag of potato chips on his grave? Flowers are unisex.
He's already pushing up daisies on his own. What's he want flowers for? You should pour a can of been on his grave and then bury some porn.

Rain Man
02-02-2004, 06:24 PM
Would It have to be necrophiLIa-type porn, or just the regular Kind? I rEally don't know my PORN-memorial etiquette very well.

whoman69
02-02-2004, 07:05 PM
He's already pushing up daisies on his own. What's he want flowers for? You should pour a can of been on his grave and then bury some porn.
Now thats how to celebrate. But I don't need the porn as I'm running missions scouting out all the nurses in the hereafter. I was a navigator and have a foolproof tool to know when I'm near the target.
Rain Man, that was a touching sentiment about the flowers.

I got a younger brother who is on the replacement list. Lord knows I hope you guys won't need it but I hope he can end up on this crew. The best and toughest in the fleet. We took more punishment than someone forced to watch replays of the Chiefs-Colts playoff games.

Braincase
02-03-2004, 11:04 AM
Hi, left wasted gunner reporting... BURP!

Rain Man
02-03-2004, 11:13 AM
I swear, the new guys just get younger every day.

Braincase
02-04-2004, 08:23 AM
I swear, the new guys just get younger every day.

I'll see if a mod can change my handle to Effengi.

tk13
02-06-2004, 03:52 AM
Alright boys, we're going to need to be at our best so we don't have a mess for the third time in a row. This is what it's all about! This is what you practice for! This is where preparation meets execution! Are you ready?!?!

OFFENSE... GO TO WORK!

DEFENSE... GO TO WORK!

SPECIAL TEAMS... GO TO WORK!

YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAH!


Wait a min... Uh, yeah....

tk13
02-07-2004, 03:55 AM
Good job crew! Nobody died in mission 4.... although we did not hit the target and had to land on our belly once again, we will live to fight another day!

And remember, there will a be a quiz over selt belt operation and emergency exit location before our next mission. And before BrainCase asks, no, it cannot be open book, er, plane, er, whatever.

Rain Man
02-07-2004, 04:21 AM
We killed some enemy today, too. A flying gunship, we are.

tk13
02-12-2004, 02:03 AM
B17 #10 – Gunther’s Thunder

Pilot Rain Man (4)
Copilot tk13 (4)
Bombardier Chitown (3)
Navigator KC Jones (4)
Engineer Duck Dog (4)
Radio Op. DrNick (4)
Tail Gunner Cormac (4)
Ball Turret Gunner The Rick (4)
Right Waist Gunner DaKCMan AP (1)
Left Waist Gunner BrainCase (1)

Target: Amiens
Mid-formation horizontally and vertically (low vulnerability)

Zone 1 Out: Britain

No enemy
The crew welcomes Chitown back from his hospital stay.

Zone 2 Out: English Channel

No enemy

Zone 3 Out: France (Entering Target Zone)

5 Fw190s attack – 2 are driven off by fighters

braincase fires, misses
chitown fires, misses
dakcmanAP fires, misses
kc jones fires, misses
duck dog fires, misses

1 Fw misses, break off attack

Fw lines up at 12 o’clock high and strafes 6 hits down the fuselage!
-nose – chitown seriously wounded as his left leg is severed above the knee
-pilot compartment – rain man sustains light wound to left forearm
-bomb bay – PING! A bomb is hit, but doesn’t explode.
-radio room – dr nick suffers light wound to stomach
-waist – right waist gun is knocked out of commission
-tail – rudder damaged

Fw scores 3 hits
-bomb bay – PING! – Another bomb is hit with no explosion, but the crew is getting mighty nervous
-superficial damage to radio room
-nose – another shell hits chitown in the chest, and he dies from blood loss

2 Fws circle, attack again

kc jones fires, misses
cormac fires, misses
duck dog fires, misses
dr nick fires, misses

Despite the hits and the death of Bombardier Chitown, rain man decides that it’s better to stay in formation and fly through the bomb run. Since he’s injured, tk13 takes over the flight.

Entering Bomb Zone
Good Weather
Light Flak – 3 hits
-starboard tail root damaged
-starboard elevator out of commission
-port wing root damaged

With no bombardier, KC Jones takes over but has no training in dropping the bombs – 0% score

Zone 3 Back: France (Leaving Target Zone)

DakcmanAP moves up and takes over the port cheek gun and nose gun.

1 Fw190, 2 Me109s attack – 1 Fw190 and 1 Me109 are driven away by fighters

kc jones fires, kills Me109
dakcmanAP fires, misses

2 Fw190s driven off by fighters

Zone 2: English Channel

No enemy

Zone 1: England

Bad weather, heavy fog
Nonetheless, tk13 glides Gunther’s Thunder in to a smooth stop.

Aftereffects

None

Eligible for next mission

Pilot Rain Man (4)
Copilot tk13 (4)
Bombardier KC Jones (4), promoted
Navigator Duck Dog (4) , promoted
Engineer DrNick (4) , promoted
Radio Op. Cormac (4) , promoted
Tail Gunner The Rick (4) , promoted
Ball Turret Gunner DaKCMan AP (1) , promoted
Right Waist Gunner BrainCase (1) , promoted
Left Waist Gunner XXX



Another rough mission, and we were 'low vulnerability' this time too...

Our plane is really taking a beating. I'd like to see stats for shots taken, we've been hit quite a bit.

Oh well, the "easy" missions are over, it only gets harder from here.

Rain Man
02-12-2004, 10:26 AM
Do the birds at the pubs dig purple hearts?

Rain Man
02-14-2004, 01:25 PM
Lucy Coopersmith
3128 Thames Street
Cambridge, England

My dearest Lucy,

We completed our fifth mission today to great fanfare. We attacked the railyard at Amiens today, but unfortunately our bombardier was killed before he could sight the target. We missed, but I'm sure that the other bombers knocked out that railyard.

We've been sent all over the place so far in the war. On five missions, we've been to Amiens, Lille, Meaulte, St. Omer, and Abbeville. Our first mission, the Abbeville one, remains our most successful, though at least we didn't have to crash-land the plane on our latest one. I did get a purple heart, though, when a bullet took a piece out of my left forearm. Don't worry, though; it wasn't serious.

I greatly enjoyed my time off with you last month, and hold fond memories of our romps in the Hotel Desmond. I really had some explaining to do once the rest of the crew saw all those scratches on my back!

Yours truly,

1/Lt Kevin

Rain Man
02-14-2004, 01:27 PM
Jeannie Shapiro
9292 Starfish Way
Sarasota, FL

My dearest Jeannie,

We completed our fifth mission today to great fanfare. We attacked the railyard at Amiens today, but unfortunately our bombardier was killed before he could sight the target. We missed, but I'm sure that the other bombers knocked out that railyard.

We've been sent all over the place so far in the war. On five missions, we've been to Amiens, Lille, Meaulte, St. Omer, and Abbeville. Our first mission, the Abbeville one, remains our most successful, though at least we didn't have to crash-land the plane on our latest one. I did get a purple heart, though, when a bullet took a piece out of my left forearm. Don't worry, though; it wasn't serious.

I greatly enjoyed my time off with you last month, and hold fond memories of our romps in the Hotel Desmond. I really had some explaining to do once the rest of the crew saw all those scratches on my back!

Yours truly,

1/Lt Kevin

Rain Man
02-14-2004, 01:28 PM
Marlene Friar
23 West Point Circle
Fort Benning, GA

My dearest Marlene,

We completed our fifth mission today to great fanfare. We attacked the railyard at Amiens today, but unfortunately our bombardier was killed before he could sight the target. We missed, but I'm sure that the other bombers knocked out that railyard.

We've been sent all over the place so far in the war. On five missions, we've been to Amiens, Lille, Meaulte, St. Omer, and Abbeville. Our first mission, the Abbeville one, remains our most successful, though at least we didn't have to crash-land the plane on our latest one. I did get a purple heart, though, when a bullet took a piece out of my left forearm. Don't worry, though; it wasn't serious.

I greatly enjoyed my time off with you last month, and hold fond memories of our romps in the Hotel Desmond. I really had some explaining to do once the rest of the crew saw all those scratches on my back!

Yours truly,

1/Lt Kevin

Rain Man
02-14-2004, 01:29 PM
Betty Lou Hobnobski
16 Clear Creek Lane
Rolla, MO

My dearest Betty,

We completed our fifth mission today to great fanfare. We attacked the railyard at Amiens today, but unfortunately our bombardier was killed before he could sight the target. We missed, but I'm sure that the other bombers knocked out that railyard.

We've been sent all over the place so far in the war. On five missions, we've been to Amiens, Lille, Meaulte, St. Omer, and Abbeville. Our first mission, the Abbeville one, remains our most successful, though at least we didn't have to crash-land the plane on our latest one. I did get a purple heart, though, when a bullet took a piece out of my left forearm. Don't worry, though; it wasn't serious.

I greatly enjoyed my time off with you last month, and hold fond memories of our romps in the Hotel Desmond. I really had some explaining to do once the rest of the crew saw all those scratches on my back!

Yours truly,

1/Lt Kevin

Rain Man
02-14-2004, 01:30 PM
Uh-oh.


I just noticed something. Has the mail gone out yet?

Hydrae
02-14-2004, 02:24 PM
Uh-oh.


I just noticed something. Has the mail gone out yet?


Well look at it this way, you will only have to write one letter next time! ROFL


BTW, I would love to read the responses you get from Jeannie, Marlene and Betty! :D

Rain Man
02-15-2004, 02:31 PM
Will someone write letters to Betty, Marlene, Jeannie, and Lucy for me? You might want to be tactful with the first three.

Stinger
02-19-2004, 03:41 PM
New tail gunner reporting for duty.... Where is the Pub?

Oh, Did Rain Man leave his black book?

MOhillbilly
02-19-2004, 03:46 PM
New tail gunner reporting for duty.... Where is the Pub?

Oh, Did Rain Man leave his black book?

No doubt. Im lookin forward to alittle of that overpayed,oversexed,overhere ive heard so much about.I just hope i dont end up like the last radio man.*gulp*

Bug
02-19-2004, 07:13 PM
Hey all....replacement right waist(ed) gunner......(buuuurrrp) damn the irish wiskey is good........so this is our new ride....where can i stash a..er ummm my gear..yea thats it.....need to stow some gear....kinda fragile to no less.........anyways.....i'm goin' over to the pub for a couple anyone else???? :thumb:

4th and Long
02-19-2004, 08:07 PM
Pub? Did someone say pub? :D

I cant let my counterpart on the opposite side of the plane drink alone! http://www.mikenorris.com/smileys/all_coholic.gif BUG! WAIT FOR ME BUDDY!!!!

JOhn
02-22-2004, 05:01 PM
Gunther's Thunder III

Whooo Hoooo

All right you slackers, time to say howdy to yer new pilot. :D


Ready to kill a few Nazi's?

Stinger
02-22-2004, 06:51 PM
PBJ We live to see an fight another day PBJ

[
Well that was a good first run, well minus the whole Dr. Nick thing, not bad for a thrown together crew :thumb:......


Pilot JOhn
Copilot KC Jones (6)
Bombardier Taliswoman (1)
Navigator Dartgod, promoted
Engineer Mohillbilly, promoted
Radio Op. Stinger, promoted
Tail Gunner roger, promoted
Ball Turret Gunner Bug, promoted
Right Waist Gunner 4th and Long, promoted
Left Waist Gunner XXX


Oh yeah to celebrate I am buying the first round!!!!!!!!!!! :toast:

Well actually they forgot to close Rainman's tab.:D

4th and Long
02-22-2004, 09:44 PM
Someone let me know when we fly (have flown if Im not here) so I can keep up with this.

I have some thing I need to attend to and must sneek across enemy lines to do so.

http://www.beagleton.com/toon/ace/ace.jpg

I hope this cheesy moustache disguise works out ok.

http://www.havanafolks.com/phil/snoopy/images/snoopyace.jpg

If anyone needs me in the short term, I'll be at the local pub quaffing down a few root beers.

Careful everyone. There are spies everywhere!

http://www.bleckly.com/jason/snoopy/flyingace/ace001.gif

Stinger
02-23-2004, 12:25 AM
Someone let me know when we fly (have flown if Im not here) so I can keep up with this.

I have some thing I need to attend to and must sneek across enemy lines to do so.


Was it to do this ROFL

4th and Long
02-23-2004, 07:01 AM
ROFL :LOL:

DAMNIT! MY COVER HAS BEEN COMPROMISED!

ROFL

Bug
02-24-2004, 07:00 PM
I'll take you up on that round....or seven.....1st mission...didn't even get a single shot off at a Jerry....and get "promoted" to ball turret......I wonder who invented THAT idea...lol.

Bug
02-28-2004, 05:44 AM
To,
Boeing Aircraft Company
Wichita, KS

Thank You. This is such a beautiful airplane....we maybe got dinged a little last mission, but we are in great shape now...the ground crews just love Gunther's Thunder III, we're gonna take her out again soon a bomb another Nazi target.
I've only completed one mission, but we did a good jop and Gunther's Thunder III got us all back to base in one piece. A couple of Nazi fighters weren't so lucky.
Everything works great, the only thing I would like to know is how do you hide a bottle of first aid medicine in the ball turret? Don't worry, it won't freeze, but it's kinda cramped and I was wondering if there was a little slot or something it might fit in.
Thanks again
Your most grateful friend
Bug

4th and Long
02-28-2004, 03:24 PM
I'll take you up on that round....or seven.....1st mission...didn't even get a single shot off at a Jerry....and get "promoted" to ball turret......I wonder who invented THAT idea...lol.
Dear Maw,

Guess whut? I done flied me one of them there missions and I had no ideur that I even flied it. I think that feller named Bug done went and slipped me a mickey before we took off cuz I was a tellin him I wasnt real big on being that high up in that thar airoplane. Turns out I even got a shot off at one of Hitlers aeroplanes, but I missed. Course I was 3 sheets into the wind apparently so ... go figure.

I heard Bug got moved somewhar else on the aeroplane. Sumthin bout him havin turrets syndrome I think. Says he has to stay in some big ol turrets ball. I think thats what he called it anyways. Maybe it's so when he starts ta cussin, the rest of the fellars dont have to hear it.

Love,

Yer son

Bug
02-28-2004, 08:12 PM
Folks,
All is well here, we flew our first mission and layed our bombs right on target. There were a lot of Nazi fighters, and we shot a few of 'em down. Met this fella called 4th and long, he likes grandad's moonshine first aid medicine, but gets kinda bleary eyed after a few swigs, it does settle our pilot JOhn down though.
Got me a promotion to ball turret gunner, can't wait till the next mission. Got me two guns now, should be fun.
Mostly boring in the air, the country side looks a lot like Texas farmland. Gets a little bumpy when the flak gets close, but Taliswoman and Dartgood just give the Nazi's a moon shot. Mohillbilly is our best drinker, gotta keep hidin' the shine from him. Stinger and Roger play cards a lot, and read some kinda magazine full of pictures, not many words. Guess they like to keep it simple.
We get a new crewman this week, don't know him yet, but will share the first aid with him anyway.
Ya'll take care, see ya after 25 missions.
Bug.

Bug
02-29-2004, 09:13 PM
ok...two missions down, no ammo wasted. (gotta shoot at something first) but I am not complaining. JOhn gets first pull on the jug this time.....

Stinger
03-09-2004, 09:58 AM
B17 #10 – Gunther’s Thunder III – Rise of the Machine

Pilot JOhn (2)
Copilot KC Jones (8)
Bombardier Taliswoman (3)
Navigator Dartgod (2)
Engineer Mohillbilly (2)
Radio Op. Stinger (2)
Tail Gunner roger (2)
Ball Turret Gunner Bug (2)
Right Waist Gunner 4th and Long (2)
Left Waist Gunner Dave Lane (1)

Target: Abbeville
Mid-formation horizontally, high vertically (moderate vulnerability)

Zone 1 Out: Britain

No enemy

Zone 2 Out: English Channel

2 Me109s driven off by fighters

Zone 3 Out: France (Entering Target Zone)

5 Me109s attack

Stinger fires, misses
Mohillbilly fires, damages Me109
Taliswoman fires, misses
Dartgod fires, hits Me109
Roger fires, kills Me109
Bug fires, misses
4th and Long fires, misses

3 Mes miss, break off attack

Me sweeps in and scores 5 hits from 3 o’clock high
-superficial damage to bomb bay doors
-superficial damage to tailplane
-nose – taliswoman is seriously wounded by hits to the left calf and right thigh.
-bomb bay – one of the doors is blown off the plane
-superficial damage to nose

Me circles, attacks again
Mohillbilly fires, misses
Roger fires, misses

Me scores 1 hit
-superficial damage to pilot compartment

Me circles, attacks again

Dartgod fires, misses
Dave Lane fires, misses

Me scores 1 hit
-BAM! The #3 engine blows a puff and smoke and dies.

Me breaks off attack

2 Me109s attack – 1 is driven off by fighters

Dartgod fires, misses
Bug fires, misses

Me misses, breaks off attack

Dartgod moves to the bomb controls, and tries to figure out how they work. Although Gunther’s Thunder III is falling back in the formation and has an incapacitated bombardier, John determines that they’re better off flying over the target with the formation. After they drop their bombs, they’ll be able to keep up and stay in formation.

Entering Bomb Zone
Good Weather
Medium Flak - Misses
Despite it being his first time at the controls, Dartgod manages to nick the target – 5% score

Zone 3 Out: France (Leaving Target Zone)

2 Me110s attack

Dartgod fires, misses
Mohillbilly fires, misses
Roger fires, hits Me110
4th and Long fires, misses

Me misses, breaks off attack

Me scores 2 hits
-superficial damage to #4 engine
-starboard wing root damaged

Me circles, attacks again

Dartgod fires, hits Me110
Dave Lane fires, hits Me110
Roger fires, misses

Me misses, breaks off attack

1 Me109, 1 Me110 attack – 1 Me110 is driven off by fighters

Roger fires, misses
Mohillbilly fires, kills Me109

Zone 2: English Channel

4 Me109s attack – 1 Me109 is driven off by fighters

Dartgod fires, misses
Roger fires, kills Me109
Bug fires, misses
4th and Long fires, misses

Me misses, breaks off attack

Me scores 1 hit
-superficial damage to nose

Me circles, attacks again

Dartgod fires, hits Me109
Roger fires, kills the same Me109

Zone 1: England

Good weather
Good landing

Aftereffects

Her hosiery modeling career may be over, but Taliswoman is not. She insists on returning, and will not miss a mission.

Eligible for next mission

Pilot JOhn (2)
Copilot KC Jones (8)
Bombardier Taliswoman (3)
Navigator Dartgod (2)
Engineer Mohillbilly (2)
Radio Op. Stinger (2)
Tail Gunner roger (2)
Ball Turret Gunner Bug (2)
Right Waist Gunner 4th and Long (2)
Left Waist Gunner Dave Lane (1)

Not a bad mission considering the problems on the way in.

:thumb:

Stinger
03-09-2004, 09:58 AM
Quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dartgod fires, hits Me110
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Ladies and gentlemen, you have witnessed history in the making. Entering Bomb Zone
Good Weather
Medium Flak - Misses
Despite it being his first time at the controls, Dartgod manages to nick the target – 5% score I think you found your problem..... you just needed to use bigger ammo. ROFL

Bug
03-10-2004, 12:21 AM
Good shooting there guys!!
Now, I think I'll go down to the range and practice a little...........
maybe quit pulling my aim off......

JOhn
03-10-2004, 10:15 PM
Well men, it looks like we need a little practice with them guns you've been given. So as not to seem like an ass, I'll make a little wager.

First man to shot down 4 enemy planes, get a free 48 hour pass to London.

And for every mission we make it back, the nights beers are on me at the Pub. :toast:

Bug
04-01-2004, 09:13 PM
WHEW!!!
No fun riding around in a itty bitty little ball with busted guns......
guess the range work is paying off though..2 confirmed kills and a probable. Which, by the way. I am positive blew up after dropping under the clouds. Now I get to man the tail...hummm, gotta find a new place for the 'shine stash,,,,umm,,err..ugh..first aid medicine kit I mean.

Bug
04-01-2004, 09:14 PM
WHEW!!!
No fun riding around in a itty bitty little ball with busted guns......
guess the range work is paying off though..2 confirmed kills and a probable. Which, by the way. I am positive blew up after dropping under the clouds. Now I get to man the tailguns...hummm, gotta find a new place for the 'shine stash,,,,umm,,err..ugh..first aid medicine kit I mean.

MOhillbilly
04-08-2004, 02:33 PM
WHEW!!!
No fun riding around in a itty bitty little ball with busted guns......
guess the range work is paying off though..2 confirmed kills and a probable. Which, by the way. I am positive blew up after dropping under the clouds. Now I get to man the tailguns...hummm, gotta find a new place for the 'shine stash,,,,umm,,err..ugh..first aid medicine kit I mean.


Dood......But you have the perfect nickname for the ball gunner.....anyway we kicked ass in a major way that time out.....it seems that drinking&flying does not affect your shooting skills. :bang:

Bug
04-09-2004, 09:12 PM
lmao......perfect name...lol

B=Big
u=ugly
G=guy

ROFL