Originally Posted by Dayze (Post 10189169)

Scenario; me with a gal I knew from working at the mall food court lol.
I came home from the Navy on leave, and we had a small party, which her boyfriend was invited but was working and couldn't attend. We were talking while everyone is mingling etc. She said something corny along the lines of “Come, I have to tell you something”. I did, and she starts kissing me heavily. I was sort of shocked since we were basically friends at the time. We kind of brushed it off. Much later in the evening I told her I was going to get a beer; on my way back she was standing near my bedroom door. I said something like “man, that was a hell of a kiss”, then she just starts taking off her panties from under her sun dress thing. I was completely shocked at this point. She was a little liquored up; tosses her drawers to me, puts her hands on her hips, smiles and says “ I think we should go in here (my room) so I can **** you”. At this point, I nearly passed out. Keep in mind, we had been pretty good friends for about 2 years so this was all out of left field. I figured, what the hell. Go in there, and holy crap. This chick was a FREAK. I had barely got in there and she started kissing me and getting my pants off. Then proceeded to give me the best (even to this date) BJ of my life. She didn’t finish, but I returned the favor. Finished up like a pron scene – getting her from behind and I was about to …ya know, she pulls a 180 and takes a load right on her face. LMAO. ‘Twas awesome.

Same chick; about 4 yrs later. I’m out of the Navy; hadn’t had much, if any contact with her for about a year. I get off of work at the liquor store, come home, and watching some TV. My phone rings, and it’s her. Out of the blue about midnight. She said she was getting married and was at her bachelorette party that was about to wrap up, and asked if she could come by. I figured sure. Not anticipating anything other than just visiting etc. She gets there we watch TV for about 20 minutes, we get with it. Some foreplay etc and she proceeded to jam 2 fingers up her backdoor as I was chowing down from behind. She then says “hang on”; she goes over to her purse and gets a condom and says “here, put this on”. 10-4. I’m getting ready to plow from behind, and she grabs my wiener (I’m thinking she’ll put it in #1), and puts it on her #2. I’m thinking she must be drunk and had put it in the wrong place lol. She then starts to PIIHB. Then I’m thinking “AWESOME”! Very slow at first, then before I know it she’s pushing back like a banchee, and pounding it. At this point, due to the awesomeness/feeling, I’m not going to last very long. I advise her as such. We go for another 10 minutes or so in #2 town. She then stops, takes off the condom, and starts blowing me. Now I really know I’m only good for about another 20 seconds. Just before, I tell her “uh…you’d better move” (lol), she didn’t flinch or stop and took it like a champion. BOOM. Was the best pop I’ve EVER had. We wrap things up; chat (which is awkward after you’ve just nailed a gal thoroughly in the #2.). About 20 minutes later, she leaves. And I haven’t heard or seen her since lol. Her poor husband……

Originally Posted by KChiefer (Post 10190258)

A buddy's babies' (yes plural) Mama brought home a girl from the bar and suggested a threesome. When my buddy touched the other girl, his girlfriend started kicking the girl's ass. Does that count?

Originally Posted by dmahurin (Post 10188790)

I was married to my ex for 6 years. Came home from work one night and was sitting on the couch next to her watching tv. She was messing around on her phone for a while and then I get a text. It read "sorry babe, I'm sitting on the couch next to Drew, I'll call you later, love you". Well, I'm Drew.

Originally Posted by Flybone McTimmerson (Post 10190170)

When I got to my first duty station in the army, there was a slutty chick sleeping with every dude in the barracks. She may as well have had a "Now Serving" sign(the kind you see at the barber or DMV) hanging outside of her room.

Anyways, one of the dudes she's banging falls in love with her, and married her. They were married for about two weeks and still living in the barracks when he gets orders to an Army Training across post. He's got to go live on that side of post and pretty much be on lockdown for the whole six weeks he's there.

As soon as he's gone, she's back to her old ways. Banging every dude in the Barracks. I don't know how, but he got word of it. He snuck out of that Training one night, walked across post, and showed up back in our barracks. Late that night while everyone was sleeping, three gunshots rang in the air. When the Military Police entered the room they found both of them dead. He had shot her twice and then blew his own brains out.

Originally Posted by Flybone McTimmerson (Post 10190170)

When I got to my first duty station in the army, there was a slutty chick sleeping with every dude in the barracks. She may as well have had a "Now Serving" sign(the kind you see at the barber or DMV) hanging outside of her room.

Anyways, one of the dudes she's banging falls in love with her, and married her. They were married for about two weeks and still living in the barracks when he gets orders to an Army Training across post. He's got to go live on that side of post and pretty much be on lockdown for the whole six weeks he's there.

As soon as he's gone, she's back to her old ways. Banging every dude in the Barracks. I don't know how, but he got word of it. He snuck out of that Training one night, walked across post, and showed up back in our barracks. Late that night while everyone was sleeping, three gunshots rang in the air. When the Military Police entered the room they found both of them dead. He had shot her twice and then blew his own brains out.

Originally Posted by CrazyPhuD (Post 10190368)

Did it make the rest of the Barracks happy now that she had five holes?

Originally Posted by JimNasium (Post 10190512)

One of the guys I served with in the Coast Guard during the late 1980s went on a Mexico junket with his dad. They left his mom and his wife at home. So they are at an all-inclusive, I can't remember where but Cabo sounds right, and they start partying with a couple of girls that they met who also happened to be married.

Things get out of control and his dad ends up with one of them in their room and my buddy takes her friend back to the room he was sharing with his dad. The chick my buddy is with gets aggressive and tells him to strip naked and lay on the bed. She then proceeds to do a sexy strip tease. Once she's finally naked she hops onto the foot of the bed and tries to playfully jump onto him. Unfortunately she fails to notice the metal bladed ceiling fan spinning right over the bed. She jumps right into the spinning blades and splits her forehead wide open spraying blood all over their naked bodies. The cut is so severe she has to be rushed to the emergency room and my buddy has to go and cock-block his own father so her friend can accompany her to a Mexican hospital.

Originally Posted by JimNasium (Post 10190512)

One of the guys I served with in the Coast Guard during the late 1980s went on a Mexico junket with his dad. They left his mom and his wife at home. So they are at an all-inclusive, I can't remember where but Cabo sounds right, and they start partying with a couple of girls that they met who also happened to be married.

Things get out of control and his dad ends up with one of them in their room and my buddy takes her friend back to the room he was sharing with his dad. The chick my buddy is with gets aggressive and tells him to strip naked and lay on the bed. She then proceeds to do a sexy strip tease. Once she's finally naked she hops onto the foot of the bed and tries to playfully jump onto him. Unfortunately she fails to notice the metal bladed ceiling fan spinning right over the bed. She jumps right into the spinning blades and splits her forehead wide open spraying blood all over their naked bodies. The cut is so severe she has to be rushed to the emergency room and my buddy has to go and cock-block his own father so her friend can accompany her to a Mexican hospital.

Originally Posted by Flybone McTimmerson (Post 10190170)

When I got to my first duty station in the army, there was a slutty chick sleeping with every dude in the barracks. She may as well have had a "Now Serving" sign(the kind you see at the barber or DMV) hanging outside of her room.

Anyways, one of the dudes she's banging falls in love with her, and married her. They were married for about two weeks and still living in the barracks when he gets orders to an Army Training across post. He's got to go live on that side of post and pretty much be on lockdown for the whole six weeks he's there.

As soon as he's gone, she's back to her old ways. Banging every dude in the Barracks. I don't know how, but he got word of it. He snuck out of that Training one night, walked across post, and showed up back in our barracks. Late that night while everyone was sleeping, three gunshots rang in the air. When the Military Police entered the room they found both of them dead. He had shot her twice and then blew his own brains out.

Originally Posted by Tombstone RJ (Post 10190520)

cocain is a hellova drug.

Originally Posted by hometeam (Post 10190295)

Pics or it doesn't count. You know the rules.